Say What?

Seeking Power

2026-03-26T22:21:00.006-05:00

In my last blog post, I talked about aging in relation to my physical performance on the bike and during my walks. Perhaps it's the Virgo in me—the meticulously organized side that tracks meaningless stuff, such as performance—but the numbers don't lie. The stats tell me I've been slowing down for many years, but a big part of my drop-off was due to my arthritic right knee. Now that I have my knee replacement rehab mostly behind me, I'm beginning to turn up the effort on my workouts, and it feels so nice.

Knowing that my days of setting PBs (personal bests) are behind me, and have been for many years, I still know there's a chance my next ride may be one where I put in an effort I haven't seen in years—a solid effort—and that motivates me.

I did that yesterday.

It may seem like a typical ride to most other fit cyclists, but to me it was a breakthrough. After years of struggling to hold 14 mph (22.5 kph) on a gravel ride, I went out yesterday (on a mixed surface route) and averaged 16.6 mph (27 kph) over 31 miles (50 km). I was so pleased with my effort. It's been the first real bright spot in my riding in years.

I came home and told Tammy about my ride, high on endorphins still coursing through my brain. In her usual sweet self, she indulged me as I told her how I did and how I felt.

I have to say that my Favero power-meter pedals and the data they display on my Garmin Edge 840 motivated me to keep pushing. I like to look at their data expressed in watts of force on the pedals per kilogram of body weight, or, as we like to say, w/kg. When I was riding strong on my indoor trainer about seven years ago, I was riding at around 3.4 w/kg. That was decent for a guy in his early 60s. In the years since, I've been nowhere near that number. I've managed a couple of indoor trainer rides in recent weeks at around 2.6 w/kg, but they were an hour or less. I started yesterday's ride at 2.15 w/kg and kept improving in strength over the remainder of the ride, finishing at 2.33 w/kg over an hour and fifty minutes, with an average heart rate of 137 (max 159) bpm. Those are good heart rate numbers for me at my age. Overall, it was a solid ride, and one that gives me confidence that I'm on the right path to regaining bike form.

I don't have a particular goal in mind for where I'd like to get to in terms of pedal power out on the road, but if I had to set one, I think 2.75 w/kg is achievable, maybe even 2.9 w/kg. But honestly, just being able to go out and put in decent efforts occasionally is what I'm really after.

I took my drone with me on a ride last weekend. I kept it behind me, only varying its height a little. It worked well. On the next ride with it, I'd like to get some other camera angles, maybe even from in front of me, for an entirely different perspective. I'm usually not in my videos; my shadow is sometimes, so this will be new for me.

That's all I've got.

"Hi Gampa"

2026-03-19T20:43:00.004-05:00

I jynxed us in my last blog post when I spoke about our mild winter. A strong depression came through Saturday night and into Sunday morning, bringing with it about 15" (38 cm) of snow, single-digit temps, and winds gusting in excess of 40 mph (65 kph). It's pretty out there, I'll say that! But a warmup is on the way! My WeatherBug app is forecasting 68°F (20 °C) for Saturday, just two days from now.

As someone who charts the progress of my rides and walks, and has for decades, I've occasionally pondered how I'll cope with diminishing returns as my pace and distance both ebb with age. I'm 68. With respect to cycling, I've mostly moved beyond the pondering stage and to the acceptance stage. I'm not the rider I was just a few years ago. But having said that, it's possible, and likely, that I'll gain speed and distance on my rides compared to recent years now that I've mostly recovered from knee replacement surgery. I'm looking forward to my right knee being able to take on its share of the work when I'm in the saddle, grinding out miles—something it's not been able to do for years due to pain from arthritis.

When I bought my first dual-sided power-meter thirteen years ago, I was surprised to learn how much power my left leg (my healthy leg) was producing compared to my right. It was generally in the 60/40 to 55/45 range. Also, my right quadriceps muscle has always been noticeably less developed than my left. Since my gravel bike is my main ride, I've recently equipped it with a set of Favero Assioma power-meter pedals so I can more accurately track the disparity between my legs' power as I work to balance them.

As for my walks, my knee isn't holding me back at all; in fact, I'm walking faster than I was in the years before my knee replacement surgery. I walked 8 miles (13 km) today at a pace of 13:55 per mile. That's a decent clip.

I biked with Tim and Bruce recently. I met up with them in Northfield and brought my drone along to see how well it did tracking us. We were all impressed by it.

As I write this, I notice the date is March 19th. It was on this day, 27 years ago, that Tammy and I had our first date. I picked her up at her home in Maple Grove and took her to dinner at Sawatdee Restaurant in Minneapolis. We both knew very early in our relationship that we were right for one another. My only regret is how fast time has flown by. I would give anything to live these last 27 years over again.

We video chat with Rachel, Drew, and Cliff nearly weekly. I'm surprised Cliff can make a connection between our small images on Rachel's phone and us. But he can. And to hear him say, "Hi Gampa", is often the highlight of my week. That little man is so special to us all.

I went to a bar in St. Paul Park a couple of Saturdays ago to attend a gig Drew was playing. Cliff brought me out to the dance floor at least four times to dance with him. I held both of his hands as he swayed around the floor while watching his dad perform. It was so sweet.

As much as I'd like to not pay attention to what is happening with our government under this fascist regime, I can't look away. I feel it's important to stay engaged and ready to defend our democracy against those who have embraced Trump, the likely child rapist masquerading as our president. His war in Iran is in its third week, and it's not going well. The Strait of Hormuz, a critical waterway through which 20% of the world's oil passes, has been blockaded by Iran, driving up pump prices by nearly a dollar per gallon since the war began. That price is only going upward with no end to this boneheaded move to strike Iran in sight. None of our allies is interested in offering their assistance, nor should they. Trump has done nothing but ridicule them while at the same time cozying up to the world's authoritarians.

Trump has successfully shifted the public's attention from talk of him being a pedophile. But we can multitask. And we will.

Only One Man to Blame

We're about to go through some things.

That's all I've got.

"Exciting Times!"

2026-03-07T18:50:00.008-06:00

Tammy had surgery on her foot last week to remove bone spurs and bone chips. Her doctor said it was a much-needed surgery for her. Over the past two years, especially, she hasn't been able to work out or walk very far the way she used to (because of pain), so we're hopeful this will give her that ability again. She was supposed to have the surgery last fall, but had to put it off for six months after her cardiac arrest experience last August. She's wearing a protective boot on her surgical foot and must avoid putting weight on it for 6 to 8 weeks. Our goal is to get her fit for a full day at the state fair in August!

We're in the waning weeks of another relatively easy winter. Nearly all of our snowfall is gone, and the long-range forecast has us well above freezing. Our last three winters have been nearly identical in terms of snowfall, with each recording less than half our usual amount (between 51 and 54 inches / 130 and 137 cm). There's still a chance that we could be dumped on in the next few weeks, but those are the numbers so far.

I drove out to my parents' former home in the cornfields of Farmington a few days ago, where they lived from 1979 until 1985. It was a nice home, just a few years old when they bought it, situated on seven acres, at least two of which were landscaped. My mom used to spend hours on her riding mower beautifying their property each week during the growing seasons. I lived with them there for a few months when I got out of the Navy in December 1979. We had many family gatherings there in the early '80s, when we were still a cohesive family unit. Those days are long gone now.

I parked out on the gravel road in front of their former home and launched my drone, flying it slowly up the driveway to avoid overhanging limbs from the overgrown trees lining it. The home looked tired. Perhaps it's the time of year with the drab color. At the end of the video, I included an aerial photo of the home that I took in 1981 when I hired a local pilot to fly me up so I could photograph it.

As I was packing up to leave, a neighbor next door approached me to ask what I was doing. He had seen the drone flying overhead. I told him my parents used to live in the home but had moved away forty years ago. He asked if my last name was Gilmore. I replied that it was and introduced myself. We chatted for ten minutes as I filled him in on what had become of our family. At 51 years old today, Brian was just a boy when we lived there, but he remembered us.

(The blog post continues below the video.)

I've been off Facebook for well over a month, and have zero regrets about leaving the platform—well, maybe just one regret. I regret not seeing the daily happy adoption stories from the Paws and Claws Humane Society in Rochester, where we found Oscar and Rudy in July 2024. I miss seeing those uplifting updates.

I'm disgusted by what has become of our country under the leadership of Trump. We are now the 'bad guys', as we wage war on countries we're assured of prevailing over, or at least we think we are, and as we turn our backs on our allies.

We attacked the sovereign nation of Venezuela recently and arrested its illegitimate president before taking some of their oil, selling it, and placing the proceeds in an offshore account controlled by Trump. We've threatened to take over Greenland, and now, partnered with Israel, we're attacking Iran, using the bogus claim that they were days away from acquiring a nuclear weapon. They're not. Besides, is a nuclear-capable Iran any more of a threat to the stability of the globe than a Trump presidency with nukes? I don't see the difference.

Speaking about his ill-conceived war in Iran, Trump commented this week that, "These are exciting times!"

What is clear to many of us is that this unnecessary and prohibitively expensive war (at least $1 billion per day) is doing what it was intended to do: draw our attention away from the Epstein files that more and more appear to show our current U.S. president as having raped little girls.

I worry about children coming of age during this administration; children who can only conclude that the criminality, cruelty, and dysfunction coming from this administration are normal politics.

It's possible that this has become our new normal, but let's hope not. Let's hope that this evilness parading as Christianity will be dealt with harshly in the years to come. Let's hope that those affiliated with and supporting this evilness will be left to feel shame at some point. And let's hope Kristi Noem is feeling that shame now.

Something that has become clear to anyone paying attention is that we cannot trust the proclamations coming from the White House or any Republican. Most people not in the cult of Trump see this administration and its supporters as being as trustworthy as state-run TV from authoritarian leaders around the globe, which is to say, not at all trustworthy.

Sobering words.

So much grief.

We could have had Kamala.

That's all I've got.

Resist!

2026-02-22T19:59:00.003-06:00

I've watched my share of Olympic coverage from Milano Cortina, Italy, over the last two-plus weeks. I mostly enjoy watching curling, but also figure skating, snowboarding, and ski jumping. I love the winter Olympics. It's been a nice distraction from our dysfunctional country. I was in a curling league two years ago and became fascinated by the sport. There is so much strategy involved. I still have much to learn about it.

I've been going to the gym (Planet Fitness) 4 to 6 days a week. It's nice that it's less than a ten-minute drive from home. I've been working on strengthening my quadriceps muscles in my surgically repaired knee, but I'm also focusing on my core—something I've neglected my entire adult life. I'm pleased with the progress I've made. I see the gym as a regular part of my workout routine for years to come. It's such a good value, too, at only $10 per month. I wish I had begun years ago, but better late than never.

I was putting on my socks recently when I noticed I had a nice bend in my surgical knee. I took a photo of it, then used an app on my phone to measure the flexion. It was around 127º. I recall my doctor telling me, after he performed a manipulation under anesthesia (aka an MUA), where he got my knee to bend to 130º, that I would be doing well to maintain 110º to 115º. I left physical therapy last March with a maximum bend of 117º. Achieving 127º makes me super happy. But there is a problem with my knee's alignment. The portion of my leg below my knee isn't lined up with the upper half, and is off by about 7º (it flares outward). I brought this up with my doctor at our one-year follow-up. He acknowledged its misalignment, but seemed unconcerned. He felt it would improve when all of the swelling had subsided. My concern was that it would lead to hip issues over time. Again, he seemed unconcerned. It's not as though there's an easy fix for it.

We got to see Rachel, Drew, Cliff, Jenny, and PJ on Valentine's Day. Our Christmas get-together was the last time we saw them. Rachel is good about Facetiming with us, usually every week or two for thirty minutes. Surprisingly, at a little over two years old, Cliff can recognize that it's Grandma GG and Grandpa KG on the phone. A few weeks ago, he was showing off to us his ability to jump on the couch, something he hadn't done before, Rachel said. He has a pleasant, curious demeanor. I love it when he calls me Grandpa. It's the sweetest thing.

He loves playing with his trucks and cars, and I love getting down on the floor with him and rolling them around. He's talking a lot. We can't always understand him, but he's working on it. I like to say I will never tire of him asking me questions, as I'm told little ones do. We're going to have some good talks together, and I can't wait for that to happen.

The photo of us from last weekend has Cliff's face turned away from the camera. For now, Rachel would like to avoid posting any photos of him online due to concerns about AI. I get that. I'll post pics of him if her sentiments change, but for now, this will do. His smile melts my heart. You'll have to trust me about that. We're loving being grandparents!

Our democracy is in peril. All the guardrails we rely on to keep our three branches of government in check and prevent them from running roughshod over one another are, for the most part, gone. The most troubling part of all of this is seeing how Republicans have rolled over and allowed this to happen, essentially removing all the guardrails that are necessary for a democracy to withstand a president who goes rogue. Heather Cox Richardson, the historian I rely on to help make sense of what's happening, has been reluctant to say we're under fascist rule, but she's there now. (Please see the video below.)

I've been wearing t-shirts to the gym with short statements of resistance, such as "Resist fascism," "Support democracy," "Resist," "Just say no to fascism," and so on. A woman at the gym stopped me a few weeks ago and thanked me for wearing them. I commented that I'd rather not feel the need to bring this sort of thing into the gym, but that I need to continue this small act of defiance for as long as necessary. She came up to me last week with a big smile. She wanted to show me her t-shirt, which said, "I run to support democracy." That made my day! But for every person who appreciates expressing concerns through t-shirts, there's probably someone else who disapproves. I can't concern myself about offending those who either support fascism or those who don't realize yet that that's what they're supporting.

Resist!

That's all I've got

I've Had Enough

2026-02-08T17:51:00.001-06:00

I've had enough. Like many people, I've toyed with the thought of deleting my Facebook account. Earlier this week, in a spur-of-the-moment decision, I decided to toy no more and did it. More accurately, I stopped short of deleting it and deactivated it instead. Not deleting it gives me continued access to Messenger, where I can still connect with friends.

Perhaps it was the algorithm I had cultivated, but maybe not. I used to manage a Facebook page that I started a while back as a tribute to a lighted oak tree in Bloomington. I let the page go dormant for years and was shocked when I looked at it a few months ago and found that it had been overrun with hard-right propaganda accounts. I've heard of this happening before. A quick search shows it's not uncommon for that to happen.

My experience of late on the platform shows a trend toward more racist and hateful comments, especially on pages for local TV stations, where the comments are primarily from residents of the metro area. No doubt, some of the interaction comes from bots, but regardless, if Facebook isn't going to try to police it, I have no use for it. I was getting the same ugly vibes on Facebook that I got on Twitter a few years ago after Musk took it over. It became a cesspool of intolerance and racism. I have no use for that. It's also not lost on me that I can easily turn the hate off, while others aren't so fortunate because of the color of their skin. They have to live with it every day.

It's possible I'll take my Facebook account out of hibernation at some point, but I don't see that happening anytime soon. I may make an exception, though, when the fascist and likely child-rapist finally exits this life, to give him a heartfelt sendoff I've already crafted. I give him three months, tops. He's not looking well.

We took a trip out to Las Vegas with some friends last month to see The Wizard of Oz at The Sphere. I didn't realize they had taken entire scenes and rearranged them with AI—the tornado scene comes to mind. I've since learned that some people are unhappy about using AI to adapt the film for the venue's 360º screen, which meant adding elements to each scene that weren't there before. We're not purists, and none of us were bothered by it. It was an immersive and impressive show that left us all in awe. I had high hopes going into the show, but even those were blown away by the experience. If you have an opportunity to see it, take it! You won't be sorry you did.

While we were in Las Vegas, we kept seeing a funny sort of vehicle, unlike any we'd seen before. We soon realized they were self-driving cars. Tammy and I took rides in them twice, with a forty-minute wait each time before it arrived. The driverless cars are called Zoox, and they're a subsidiary of Amazon. They're being tested in 7 other states, but are used only by the general public in the Las Vegas area. They're on a short leash of just a few miles for now, and they're free to use. Neither of us was hesitant about riding in them.

Tammy and I went with friends, Jay and Cindy, yesterday to visit the memorials to Renee Good and Alex Pretti in South Minneapolis. Jay is a minister and is very involved in working with the Muslim community (not in an effort to convert them, but to bring people closer together). He brought us through the Karmel Halal Market, where shops there cater to people from East Africa, primarily Somalia. I was struck by how friendly the people were towards us. I expected them to be a little suspicious of our presence, considering the attack the Somali people have been under, both on social media and by ICE thugs as they target them and others, but they were exceedingly warm and welcoming. I wish more people could experience what we did yesterday. Here are some photos from the day.

We also drove to Powderhorn Park, where there was a memorial service for Renee Good and others who have been killed by Trump's administration. As we were leaving the park, we were trying to climb a fairly steep and snow-covered hill. I was trying to help Tammy up, but we were both slipping. A young Somali man came down toward us and reached out his hand to help Tammy up the hill. That's the kindness I'm talking about. It put a bow on our experience.

Well said.

That's all I've got.

A Thank You

2026-01-22T22:20:00.002-06:00

This is a continuation of a blog post I wrote today. You can find it here.

I began using a more critical eye in my future devotions, and soon found myself doubting the validity of some of what I was reading. Was this really from God, or was this actually Moses editorializing with the writing of God's laws? I thought, wow, Moses can pretty much tell his people anything he wants—that it's direct from God to him—and they don't question it.

I was well on my way to leaving the faith during Trump's first term. I had been jumping out and jumping in over the span of a few years. But when I saw the way Trump's supporters believed every one of his huge and ridiculous lies, I thought about the origins of my faith. I wondered, what if Moses were a Trump-like figure who would tell his people grandiose stories, and they would believe him? Could this religion of mine be built on something like that?

I thought about how a man could easily assemble the basic structure of a belief system and pass it off to the masses as a divine message directly from God. And along the way, men with agendas add to it so as to better control the masses with both a promise of eternal life and a threat of eternal damnation. It all seems so plausible.

That's when so much of my belief in Christianity began to fall away. Even though I had been open to new ideas and understandings, it was still a punch in the gut to realize I could no longer trust what I was reading in the scriptures.

Funnily enough, I have the MAGA movement to credit for my leaving Christianity. This isn't meant to guilt anyone, because I'm not mad at them. I'm thankful for their unwitting help. But in all honesty, I am a little sad that I no longer live in that world. I found comfort there, and I miss that.

I'm still a person of prayer, and I pray that conservatives will open their eyes to the cruelty and the lawlessness from our government that they're gleefully supporting, while calling for more.

This is very reminiscent of 1930s Germany and the rise of the Nazi Party, something Christians supported then, too. There is nothing Christian about this.

I pray that they will come to see what so many of us have been trying to show them. That God is not with them in this—certainly Jesus isn't.

Watching the horrors of a fascist government, masked and unidentified, terrorizing and snatching people off the streets in our neighborhoods, is not something I ever imagined I would see. It isn't just immigrants that they're targeting, either. They're taking children and citizens, people peacefully protesting, and veterans. They're taking school staff who are trying to protect their students, and they're taking moms as they pick up their kids from school. They're being excessively rough with people of all ages. It's out of control, and it needs to stop.

It's so disheartening to see large numbers of Christians cheer this disgusting behavior. If what we're witnessing is the fruits of their faith, it's sending a horrible message. But seeing them take this awful side just confirms for me that I made the correct decision in leaving Christianity. And that's the point of this blog post. I would rather have been wrong. I would rather have seen Christians standing arm in arm with us, protecting the refugee, the immigrant, and the downtrodden—the same people Jesus calls us to protect.

Siding with fascism is never the right thing to do.

I need to add that I do believe in a higher power, but I can't name it. It's my own personal belief system that works for me and evolves as I reflect on it over hours of contemplation. I like to say that I think we're all going to be surprised when we leave this life, because none of us can imagine what awaits us.

A little good news!

That's all I've got.

Becoming Lost on My Faith Journey

2026-01-22T14:54:00.006-06:00

Like many people living in the Midwest, Christianity is in my DNA, or was. It was part of my core. I was raised in a Lutheran household, where we regularly attended church and Sunday school and, when I was old enough, weekly confirmation classes. There was never any talk among our family of questioning our faith, nor did we discuss religion that I can recall. What was there to discuss? If it was good enough for my parents, it was good enough for me, or something like that.

I've come to see my faith life as a winding journey. For most of my life, I was strong in my Christian faith, but then I began questioning the entire church apparatus that I'd been indoctrinated into, because there's a part of me that isn't content to embrace something I'm struggling to understand. This was maybe fifteen years ago. I still felt committed to the faith, but I recall some doubts creeping in—and I found myself open to new ideas.

My core belief centered around Jesus and the understanding that I would be with him when this life ended. I would imagine what heaven would be like: A few times a day, God would gather us before him, and we'd sing praise songs to him. The thought of singing praise songs did nothing for me. I'd rather be out riding on the beautiful black ribbons of highway, devoid of traffic and unnecessary rumble strips, that could only be found in heaven. Or spending time with our dogs that had passed years earlier. That, to me, is heaven.

I used to see my faith journey as having a destination; I was so certain my belief and obedience would lead me to heaven, but that's not me anymore. Like I said, it's a winding journey.

The earliest memory I have is of my baptism. I know, it sounds unbelievable, and it is. I can envision myself in a baptismal gown being held by someone, I can't recall who, with a lot of other people gathered around me. I see the color burgundy with subdued lighting, and what feels like we're gathered at the front of a church. I couldn't have been more than a few months old. That's why it's unbelievable. But it's a memory and a vision that I've carried with me my entire life.

I've always considered myself a seeker more than a religious person. I didn't need religion to speak to God. I had a direct line to Jesus, and I would use it often. I was, at some low level, always questioning the tenets of my faith—just a little, and I like to think God/higher power approves.

My first big break from our faith doctrine came not quite fifteen years ago, when I could no longer accept the Trinity: the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost/Spirit. The Trinity is a man-made construct, not mentioned in the Bible. And at the time, I didn't have room for such constructs within my faith. They had to go. They're still gone.

The other part of my faith that took a lasting hit was scripture. For years, I would do the Bible-in-a-Year lesson plans, year after year. It was a daily devotional for me. At one point, I read over some scripture in Deuteronomy 22: 28-29 that jumped out at me. I had been over those verses numerous times before (it's super dry to read), but I never grasped the horror of what I was reading: A virgin woman raped by a man, resulting in the woman having to marry her rapist, with the rapist paying his victim's father 50 shekels. They shall never divorce. I read it several times more over the next few minutes and tried to make sense of it.

I could not come up with a reasonable justification for this being an acceptable solution. I compared the text with many other versions, figuring there must be a more acceptable text elsewhere. I never found one. The liner notes along the bottom of my Bible had a few sentences about the scripture. It said that a woman defiled in such a way in those times would have been considered damaged goods and undesirable. It was better for her to live with her rapist than to try to make it on her own. I probably squinted my eyes to make sure I was reading the fine print correctly.

I couldn't imagine why, among all of the other laws God passed down—from not mixing fabrics, to the length of one's hair, to the specifics about what one could and couldn't eat—why couldn't there be a law that would require people to care for those among them who are in need, such as the woman who was raped. (A teaching would come later through Jesus to address this.) It troubled me to think that an abused woman wouldn't be valued more.

I was going to share a little about my transition out of organized religion in this post, but I recalled something I'd written a few years ago, when I was deep in my exit from the faith: "I Will Never Stop Seeking."

Not much has changed since I wrote that, but there is one thing I should mention: I'm comfortable with my decision to leave the faith. I will expand on that later because, in a roundabout way, it's the point of this blog piece.

This is getting lengthy, and I have a fair amount more to say. I'm going to finish this in a continuation post in a day or two. Thanks for reading.

That's all I've got.

Here is a link to part 2

We Had Whistles; They Had Guns

2026-01-10T20:53:00.017-06:00

As much as I can, I avoid using my blog to recount the endless provocations and destructive actions Trump and his administration are taking. I would rather spend my time writing about what these offenses mean to me and holding up a mirror to those who support this madness, hoping to appeal to their better angels. If there is a goal with a post like this, it's to help people see another perspective and, hopefully, to cause them to think outside the lines conservative media and conservative politicians would like them to remain in, in steadfast loyalty to them and their narrative.

I recall learning about propaganda in middle school. I was fascinated by the thought of so many people being lied to and not realizing it. I never imagined it could take root here in the United States. We're too smart for that, or so I thought. But I lacked imagination. I lacked the understanding of what billions of dollars fed into a media conglomerate could do as they invited people to come for the headlines, but stay for the culture wars — culture wars designed to appeal to the most base part of the brain while disregarding alternative considerations — and making fertile the ground they needed to plant their seeds of propaganda.

And neither did I think fascism had a chance of taking root here, either. Again, we're too smart for that, or so I thought.

What is propaganda? An internet search says: "Information, especially of a biased or misleading nature, used to promote a particular cause, doctrine, or point of view." It's straightforward and easy to spot, but you have to want to see it for what it is; otherwise, you're simply a mark. I was.

Most propaganda has a kernel of truth woven into it to make it more persuasive, but sometimes not. George W. Bush's administration propagandized the public with outright lies about "weapons of mass destruction" that they claimed existed in Iraq but did not. We went to war over that at huge expense, both in lives lost and the enormous cost ($1.8 trillion through 2023). I naively gave them the benefit of the doubt then, swayed by their lies/propaganda. I was also swayed by the lie that tax cuts for the wealthy would "trickle down" to the rest of us as the billionaire class shared in their windfall. I'm embarrassed by my naivety then, but as George W. Bush once said, roll the video — or something like that.

So yes, I've been swayed by propaganda in the past — I'm sure we all have. But what do we do when we find out we're being lied to? What lies are we willing to overlook, and what lies cross a line where they expose a more sinister, devious action that depends on my ignorance, and am I okay with being used in that way? Am I okay with being lied to again and again and again?

Nearly all of us watched January 6th, 2021, play out on our TVs. We were horrified by what we saw, only to learn later that Trump sat and watched the destructive and riotous behavior of his supporters for 3 hours and 18 minutes, sometimes replaying more gruesome segments to watch again, before finally asking his supporters to please go home, and that he loved them. How anyone could watch that and still support the man speaks volumes about the role propaganda can play in deluding people's minds. But conservative media, with the help of Kevin McCarthy, did just that; they breathed life back into Trump and set him on a course for another term as president. Fox News' lies to its viewers about Dominion Voting Systems may have cost it $787.5 million, but its viewers were likely none the wiser, as the story had been buried on its network.

This past week, we've seen a master class lesson in propagandizing the public by Trump and his administration as they wasted no time blaming the death of Renee Nicole Good, a 37 y/o woman shot three times in the head by an ICE agent in South Minneapolis, on her "radical left behavior," saying she was a "very high-level paid agitator," a "professional troublemaker," "a domestic terrorist," and other defamatory remarks about her. And not only that, but they also mischaracterized her actions, saying she "behaved horribly" and that Trump claimed "she ran over him" when none of that was true.

The actual story is that she behaved very cordially, waving other ICE vehicles ahead of hers before turning around. In fact, she waved through the car that the officer who murdered her was riding in. She wasn't obstructing them. Her last words to the officer, 25 seconds before he shot three bullets into her face, were, "That's fine, dude. I'm not mad at you."

His last words to her were, "Fucking bitch."

Here is a video of Renee's murder.

We had whistles; they had guns.

That's all I've got.

Making Sense of Our World

2026-01-03T21:17:00.020-06:00

I don't always ride for my physical health; I ride for my mental health as well. My bikes and my walks are my escapes from the world and its problems. They're what I use to help sort out my thoughts, just as writing in my blog does.

I remember the exact stretch of highway I was riding, just east of Lydia on a beautiful Sunday morning in October 2008, when I stopped being owned by the Republican Party for my pro-life vote. I took it back. I had been contemplating the presidential endorsement Colin Powell gave Obama on Meet the Press a couple of hours earlier. It was a powerful endorsement and one I couldn't ignore. I made a conscious decision in that moment to open my mind to switching my support.

Before that morning, I had always been a reliable vote for conservatives, primarily because of reasons centered around abortion. But they were using me. Putting the issue of abortion aside, it became clear to me that I could no longer support a political party that was heavily weighted toward the support of business at the expense of the masses. Trickle-down economics, something I believed in, proved to be a failure (yet, here we go again). Our ill-fated foray into Iraq for a lie about weapons of mass destruction also played into my decision, as did Bush's assault on the federal workforce with a 5-year pay freeze directed solely at air traffic controllers but not management.

Why was I supporting and defending these people?

Over the next several months, I would work to disabuse myself of so much about conservatism that I had been conditioned to accept, mostly from conservative talk radio personalities, which I had allowed to influence my understanding of so many issues. It would soon become the single most freeing thing I've ever done, to walk away from the dysfunction of the party and no longer feel the need to defend it. As I've previously written in my blog, my decision to leave the party also stemmed from years of debates with progressive voices on a forum that predated Facebook; debates that I was often on the losing side of. Those online friends were instrumental in helping me see another perspective that I'd been wilfully ignorant of. It took years to reassemble the bricks of the foundation I'd torn down into something that was actually functional and made sense to me. The abortion issue no longer took precedence as I came to understand that there are myriad valid reasons why women choose to terminate pregnancies. And besides, I was only ever pro-birth, like the rest of those who call themselves pro-life.

This morning, Trump launched an assault on the country of Venezuela and arrested their illegitimate leader, Nicolas Maduro, ostensibly because he's involved in drug trafficking. It's a flimsy excuse considering how, less than a month ago, he pardoned the former president of Honduras, one year into a 45-year prison sentence for his role in trafficking 400 tons of cocaine into the U.S. Many of us see this action by Trump as an attempt to take control of Venezuela's oil production and distribution, likely enriching bad actors along the way. I can't help but wonder, had Maduro 'paid to play' in Trump's corrupt world, would he be a free man today? No doubt. And we also see Trump's assault on Venezuela as an attempt to distract us from his failing and flailing presidency and the release of the Epstein files that will likely show Trump is a pedophile.

For those wanting another perspective about Trump's role in what may have happened between himself and underage girls, please check out this video of a woman who goes by the pseudonym Katie Johnson and her claims that Trump raped her numerous times in 1994 when she was 13 years old. There's nothing about her words or the way she says them that leads me to believe she's lying. The video is part of a lawsuit she filed in 2016, only to rescind her suit in the weeks before the presidential election of 2016 due to death threats she received.

My Christian conservative friends: what are you thinking? Did you get your SCOTUS judges? Did you get to vent publicly with no shame about transgender people? Is that what mattered? Is that a fair tradeoff for seeing peaceful, hard-working immigrant seniors and young adults who add so much to the fabric of our communities, and who have only ever known this country, being stolen off the streets and whisked away in ICE vehicles? Can I ask you to put yourselves in the shoes of a 20-, 30-, or 40-something-year-old, or even a teenager—especially a teenager, and to imagine how you would feel if you woke up in a foreign land with no money, no cellphone, no family, no support, and no idea what to do next? Does that thought trouble you? Good. Keep expanding on it. Take it further and see if maybe your vote to punch down on immigrants, end abortion, gay marriage (next), more guns, and for a felon and likely pedophile presidential candidate wasn't perhaps a wrong choice. We're better than this.

One of the people I rely on and trust to highlight important happenings and how they mirror our history is Heather Cox Richardson. I'll sometimes link to her daily updates here via her Substack or her YouTube channel. Her Substack letter is usually the first thing I read in the morning. It's very informative.

Heather's video below was done this morning after a night of little sleep. She's dedicated to using her expertise as a historian to help us navigate the troubling era we're living in. Please watch her video below. If you don't have time, just check out the last few minutes.

My intention isn't to upset anyone with my words, but if I cause you some discomfort, I'm good with that, because this shit's getting old.

That's all I've got.

So Long, CI

2025-12-21T19:56:00.014-06:00

I attended the official lighting ceremony for the Glowing Tree in Bloomington earlier this month. I was worried that the new version of the lighted oak wouldn't live up to years past, but it did. It's every bit as beautiful as it ever was, and likely even better. I spoke with one of the workers and one of the owners of the home where the tree resides. They said it took 40,000 lights and 160 man-hours to string the lights. I've included a video of the tree's lighting at the end of this post.

If you're in the Minneapolis metro area, you can find the tree less than a mile southwest of the Mall of America, just west of Cedar Ave. Here's a link.

Our 17-year-old furnace began acting up when we turned it on last month. It was an ignition issue. The tech who came out to service it said the manufacturer no longer made parts for our Ruud furnace and that it would need to be replaced. Thankfully, the tech was able to get it working again, but cautioned us that it was a temporary fix and not to expect it to hold up for long. We opted to replace both the furnace and air conditioner, but instead of an air conditioner, we chose a heat pump. The heat pump does dual duty as both an air conditioner and a heater. It does the work of our furnace down to 20°F (-6.6°C), after which the furnace takes over. Heat pumps are gaining in popularity here in the Midwest, driven by technological advancements that allow them to operate in extreme cold and by their energy savings. Our new furnace is a Bryant. We used Streitz Heating and Cooling in Dundas and are very pleased with the work they did for us.

It's been a dozen years since I last hung outdoor Christmas lights, and about five years since we decorated the inside of our home for Christmas and sent out Christmas cards. We haven't become anti-Christmas, but at some point, with just the two of us here, we decided to pull back on immersing ourselves in the tradition. Our lives are easier for it, but with Cliff and a baby brother on the way, we plan to add limited holiday decor to our home again when they're old enough to enjoy it. We had tossed out our artificial tree a couple of years ago, as it had seen better days. A spur-of-the-moment decision led us to purchase a replacement tree a couple of weeks ago. We like it. It's nearly the only Christmas decor in our home.

Tammy and I made a quick trip up to Duluth last Tuesday to take in the Bentleyville USA light display made possible by Nathan Bentley and his crew of (they say) more than a thousand volunteers. The light display originated at his home in Esko, about 10 miles west of Duluth, in the early 2000s. Its popularity led to traffic congestion, so it was moved to Bayfront Park in 2009. It's quite the sprawling display of lights! Here's an Instagram post I made about the light display.

It's no secret that I love the city of Duluth and the North Shore. I wasn't sure if I'd have time to put in some walking miles along the Lakewalk while we were in town so briefly, but I was able to—twice! I can't get enough of the walk along the lake. For me, there's something about having that large body of water to look out over that I find calming and beautiful.

Trump announced this week that the White House will host the “Patriot Games,” a competition with young athletes from across the country, as part of the celebration of the United States’ 250th anniversary next year. Tammy had a better idea. She suggested a reality show in which uber-wealthy people would compete with regular people to eke out a living. Contestants would be given a meager amount of money to start with, but then they would be on their own to provide for themselves. Without their network of friends, they would have to fund their schooling and living expenses, such as transportation, healthcare, childcare, etc., with no family or friends to rely on. They would be placed in the shoes of so many who are struggling to keep up. It's a thought-provoking scenario. Sure, some would do exceedingly well, but many others without the benefit of old family money and connections would likely struggle. Our world today is much different than the one I came of age in and ventured out into.

My fellow air traffic controllers and I lost a friend this past week. Dave Celski, aka CI (his operating initials at work), passed away due to heart failure. Dave and I had a falling out a few years ago over politics. Sad face. About six weeks ago, I had him on my mind and decided to text him to see how he was. We immediately resumed our friendship as if there had never been an interruption. We weren't close, but we enjoyed many rounds of golf together and chats at work. He told me of some heart-related issues he was having, resulting in his heart only functioning at 20% efficiency. But he didn't dwell on that. We chatted about our grandkids and our lives. It was so nice to hear from him again. We talked about getting together soon in person, but sadly, I figured we may never get the chance.

So long, friend. You were a good guy.

Happy holidays!

That's all I've got.

The Glowing Tree will Soon Glow Again

2025-11-19T19:16:00.000-06:00

Fifteen years ago, I set up a Facebook page called Glowing Tree in Bloomington, dedicated to a beautifully lit oak tree west of Cedar Ave and south of Old Shakopee Rd. The tree was lit each year from Thanksgiving through January 1st, but it went dark eleven years ago when it became more of an attraction than the owners were prepared for. I spoke with Bob Little then, the man who owned and maintained the tree. He said they were getting so many people driving through the neighborhood to get a closer look that it was becoming a nuisance for what used to be a quiet suburban street just southwest of the Mall of America. It was also a significant expense to maintain and operate, he said.

Who didn't love crossing the Cedar Ave bridge to look out across the marsh and take in the beauty of the tree shining brightly for all to see?

After the tree went dark, our holiday seasons seemed lacking in the years that followed, without the lighted tree that so many looked forward to seeing each year. I still look out at the tree and imagine it being lit again.

Well, I have some good news! The tree will be lit again this year, beginning on December 7th!

I recently received a message on the Glowing Tree Facebook page from a woman who works for the assisted living company that now owns the home where the tree resides. She was seeking permission to post to the page about plans to light the tree again. "Of course!" I replied. The owners are seeking $10,000 to get the tree ready for lighting. Here's a link to their fundraising page. Marlena told me the tree was dying, she thinks, from the massive number of lights wrapped around it, but in the last few years, it's made a remarkable comeback. I trust they're taking precautions to prevent stressing the tree with the new lights. She's invited Tammy and me to attend the lighting event on December 7th. We'll be there.

We were treated last week to a stunning display of the Northern Lights. When I first became aware of it, I stepped outside to have a look, but there wasn't much to see. An hour later, all of that changed. I can't recall ever seeing such a rich crimson color from previous Northern Lights displays I've witnessed. I, and thousands of others, took to social media to post our photos. I especially enjoyed scrolling through my Threads feed, which was nothing but pictures of the Northern Lights from all across the country and beyond. Here is a collection of photos I took.

I'm taking a break from my regular routine this week and spending time in my basement glass shop working on suncatchers for my Etsy site. It's been too long since I've thrown myself into my hobby, and I've missed it. If you're interested, you can follow my glass art on Instagram.

I was hoping for some breaks in the clouds today to get some photos of my latest work to upload to Instagram and my Etsy site. Tomorrow looks promising for that.

Friday marks one year since my knee replacement surgery. It took me until a few months ago to finally be able to say I'm glad I had the surgery done. I'm working my knee hard at the gym several days each week, and I'm also trying to get miles in on my indoor bike trainer. Last week, I logged about 115,000 steps, mostly from walking Oscar and Rudy (about 4 miles / 6.4 km per day). I need to take more time for recovery, as it's become a little too much for where I'm at in my rehab. I'm mostly lying low this week to give my knee a proper, and well-deserved rest. It's feeling much better already.

That's all I've got.

Faith Talk and More

2025-10-21T22:32:00.005-05:00

In December 1974, my dad's job took him—and what remained of our family at home (two younger brothers and our two pups, Mopsy and Toto)—to Pottstown, PA. My father allowed me to stay behind and finish my senior year of high school. I was a troubled kid, so I'm not sure why he placed any amount of trust in me. I had been actively using a variety of recreational drugs up to just a few months before this point (primarily speed, LSD, mescalin, etc), but I had stopped all of that activity after a frightening trip on LSD one night where I prayed to God that if I survived, I would straighten up. And I did.

My parents allowing me to remain behind felt like they were ready to be done raising me. While I was grateful not to have to uproot my life and move with them, I quietly harbored resentment about it for years. It felt like they had given up on me. I recall them stopping by the apartment they had rented for my sister and me on their way out of town—one last goodbye. As my dad and mom made their way down the stairs from the hallway outside our apartment to their car, my dad yelled up to me, something about making them proud and that I was a man now. "This is how my childhood ends?" I remember how sobering a moment that was for me for a variety of reasons. Actually, I was still just a kid. I was 17.

Unsurprisingly, I ended up in the military, enlisting in the Navy for a four-year term six months after graduation.

My mother was a Lutheran her entire life, and my father was raised Catholic, but he had nothing but disdain for the church, where nuns used to occasionally ridicule him as a young boy for being poor. He had lost both of his parents before the age of ten. Father Quilty, the Father at the church, was my dad's father figure. He left such a mark on him that he kept an old sepia photo of him in his wallet for the rest of his life. I never saw my dad as having a strong faith, but I could be wrong. To me, he seemed to play the role of a churchgoing husband as a favor to my mom. I respected him for that, as all marriages have some give-and-take.

The one thing I took away from my childhood, thanks to our weekly church attendance at St Michael's Lutheran Church in Bloomington, was a faith in a higher power—God, or more specifically, Jesus. As I ventured out into the world as a young adult, I always had the sense that I was being watched over and that God had a plan for my life. I still believe that, and I still believe in a higher power, but my belief in Christianity is a dying ember now, and that saddens me because my faith and my time spent quietly praying to Jesus used to be so integral to my life.

I started the process of leaving the church and the faith in the 2010s. This series of posts about the marrying of religion with politics that I witnessed at Hosanna, my former church, helped to put me firmly on the road to deconstructing my faith, even if I didn't realize then what I was doing. I thought I was merely questioning it.

I know I'm not alone in this. Many people are leaving the church for a variety of reasons, and I think chief among them is the coupling of Christianity with politics for the purpose of power and control. The church has a long history of wedding religion and politics, going back to the rule of Emperor Constantine, who used the faithful for political power. We're witnessing the same thing today with the current administration in a very gross and off-putting way. I've tried to put aside what evangelicals are doing; still, I can't get beyond the understanding I've come to, that Christianity is a religion derived from men with agendas, and not so much God-inspired. I don't come to that belief easily. It's taken me years to get here, but I'm not at any sort of destination yet. My faith walk is a journey.

It's not my purpose to cause anyone to stumble in their faith. I know how important it is to many. All I would ask is that you clearly see what's happening on the streets of some of our major cities here in the U.S., as ICE agents/thugs whisk away people—people who in many cases have only ever known this country—out of their peaceful law-abiding lives and take many of them to lands they've never been to where they don't even speak the language. As I said in my last blog post, any church that is ignoring what our government is doing to these people, and skipping over the matter like they do the red letters of the New Testament, that's a church devoid of Jesus. If it's yours, find a new church.

So, I find myself at an uneasy place at this stage in my life. I had hoped to have questions about salvation and eternal life figured out by now, but I'm as far away as I've ever been from an understanding of such matters.

And I worry about losing our form of democracy. I think about it regularly throughout the day. I see the militarization happening on our streets with tanks and men with weapons, dressed for war in a fascistic display of power. And I cringe. I see a president taking heavy machinery to the East Wing of the White House—the People's House—and demolishing it and its history, and I'm saddened, all to make way for an obscenely large ballroom that seems to thumb its nose at the ordinary person. Most of us saw the images of the destruction and thought of it as a metaphor for what he's doing to our nation.

As I keep hearing, if we're waiting for the courts to save us from what's coming, don't. They won't save us. And the media is seriously failing us. Much of our media has been neutered by threats of retaliation if they color too far outside the lines of what the administration deems acceptable, or they've been bought out by billionaires with eyes fixed on compliant politicians who will make them even wealthier.

It will be we-the-people who either uphold our democracy or allow it to die. Please, if you're not able to get involved, try to inform yourself through reputable media sources so you can better recognize the threats this administration poses to our government, our democracy, and our freedoms. You will not find those voices in conservative spaces. Be sure of that.

We're in a bad place. I hope you can see that. If not, let's talk.

Dan McClellan is a biblical scholar whose online content I find compelling, as he uses his knowledge to challenge misleading dogmas within the church, such as the misplaced focus on same-sex relationships and, a big concern of mine, the issue of scriptural authenticity. He also uses his platform to push back on what many of us see as a slide into fascism under an administration that is looking more authoritarian every day, while proclaiming a faith that would cause Jesus to overturn the merch tables of these false Christians. Please watch Dan's recent video below if you have the time.

That's all I've got.

Chip Dipper and I'm Concerned

2025-10-13T22:26:00.023-05:00

Cliff turned 22 months old a couple of days ago and is already certified in chip dipping. He also let out an "oh shit!" recently. What will he do or say next? I have no idea, but the thought of what it may be makes me smile.

The pups and I have been getting in lots of miles walking in our neighborhood and beyond. For now, we're averaging about 4 miles (6.4 km) a day, with 2 miles in the morning and 2 in the evening. Once the cooler weather sets in, we'll walk less. It's good therapy for my knee's rehab.

Like many others here and abroad, I'm saddened by what I'm witnessing happening to our country. We're being ruled by people who, at their core, are white supremacists. They've formed the MAGA (Make America Great Again) movement by co-opting, to a large degree, the Christian church and have launched a Christian nationalist agenda using the Evangelical Church as its springboard. What's disturbing about it is the unholy alliance between the church and the tech-world billionaire class, who will fund their movement to a degree that may be hard to counter.

What is the most unnerving part of all of this is the understanding that the MAGA movement is absolutely sure that their god is on their side, so there is no need to do any amount of self-reflection to see if maybe they're not seeing a larger picture, one with at least a measure of kindness.

I know this is going to sound harsh to some of you, but I don't know how else to say any of this.

Daily, we're witnessing neighborhoods being terrorized by roaming bands of masked ICE agents in full riot gear, snatching people off the streets, out of their cars, and out of their homes in front of family and friends, with no regard given to the dignity of the people they're stealing away. ICE agents are staking out courtrooms and snatching people as they show up for immigration hearings. Their current focus is on people of Hispanic origin, but they show little hesitation in arresting anyone who looks at them wrongly.

Is this okay?

A minister on a street in Chicago last week had his arms outstretched in prayer, facing three ICE officers on the rooftop above with weapons pointed at the protesters below. They shot him in the head with some sort of non-lethal round, sending him to his knees in pain. What in the actual fuck is happening? Are your churches talking about this and condemning it? If not, find one that is. There is no Jesus in the ideology of what is driving these people, although they mention Jesus a lot. And smile.

I look at the masked ICE agents and I see mostly angry white men hopped up on hard-right propaganda, looking at those undesireables and seeing them, not as people in need of apprehension, but as the enemy.

If you can, please try to imagine yourself in the shoes of those being targeted, having only ever known this country as home and English as your language, being deported to a place you've never been to and where you don’t speak the language and have no one to help you. It's genuinely frightening to spend a little time contemplating that scenario, but we owe it to ourselves to do just that—because it's happening.

And to be sure: this is Fascism. Please know that.

I watched an interview with Tim Miller from The Bulwark, where he interviews a man named George Retes, who was wrongly arrested and held for days without contact with his family or an attorney. George is a US citizen who served in the US military. And yet they dragged him out of his car as he was on his way to work and hauled him away. They abused him and disrespected him in a most un-American way. It's a little long, but give it a few minutes if you can. Here's the link.

At the root of all this is Trump's desire to create a conflict so significant that he must assume total control. That's been clear for a while. So far, cooler heads have prevailed among those being targeted and those protesting. But there may come a point when someone reacts violently, triggering panic or an incident, giving Trump what he's been after: an excuse to invoke the Insurrection Act. It's bound to happen.

I don't know where we go from here, but it won't be good. I'm generally an optimist, but not now. I'm not in any way defeated, but I am greatly concerned. Our democracy hangs in the balance. If you're not seeing that, I would love to chat with you.

There is a march this Saturday called the No Kings rally. Tammy and I will likely be riding the light rail to the Capitol in St. Paul. Please consider attending a rally near you. They need to see that you care and that you will raise your voice in opposition to what they're doing. This is a critical point in our nation's history. You want to be able to look back and say that you got involved. Somehow.

This is a good piece from Heather Cox Richardson today about the origins of Columbus Day.

That's all I've got.

A Follow-Up and an Anniversary

2025-10-06T21:13:00.000-05:00

Tammy had a follow-up appointment last Friday with a member of her medical team to discuss the findings of an MRI she'd had done the previous week to check for any damage to her heart after her cardiac arrest event in August. We're happy to say that her heart shows no signs of damage. That was such great news to hear. The nurse practitioner we met with said, "You're a very lucky lady." We're relieved and thankful.

We paid a visit to the Lakeville police department a few weeks ago to inquire about meeting with the team that responded on the morning of Tammy's emergency, to determine a suitable time to meet the crew and express our gratitude. An officer we spoke with told us they were having an award ceremony for Officer Russel Spearman, the officer who first responded to our 911 call, the following Wednesday at the start of the shift. Officer Spearman knew nothing of the ceremony, nor did they tell him we would be there.

They had us wait just outside the room where roll call was taking place, then had us go forward as the presentation began—the first order of business. Officer Spearman was surprised to learn that he was receiving an award, and even more surprised to see Tammy. It was an emotional moment for all of us, but especially for Tammy and Russel.

Blogs may have gone out of fashion, but this little blog of mine turns 22 years old today! I don't write to it as often as I used to, but it still plays a vital role in my life as it's where I go to sort through my thoughts. It's served me well in that regard. When I began writing here in my mid-40s, I was a fairly staunch conservative and someone who had never seriously challenged my beliefs. It was only a few years' worth of writing before I began to see cracks and inconsistencies in some long-held politically related beliefs of mine, which were brought to light through contemplation in my writing and with the help of some friends I'd made online through a forum where we discussed music and politics.

We had some heated discussions in the forum that often left me at a disadvantage due to my own willful ignorance, by allowing conservative pundits to be the basis for my limited knowledge. At some point, I left the forum, still stuck in my conservative ways, but never forgetting all of the many differing perspectives I'd learned there.

My blog was instrumental in helping me sort through my thoughts as I undertook the self-reflective work of challenging and dismantling my way of thinking and allowing other perspectives to gain a foothold as I worked to rebuild and understand this entirely different way of thinking. It would take a few years of being away, but I eventually made my way back to the forum to thank them all for opening my eyes to so much of what I'd been blind to. I'm grateful to have had the benefit of some patient people through that forum who didn't give up on me.

If you find yourself facing a similar dilemma for whatever reason, consider starting a blog or journal to sort through your thoughts. There's something about putting my thoughts in written form and making them public that causes me to dive deeper into what I honestly believe. Because when I write them down and share them, I own those words, and I want to be certain I get them right. Also, you can keep your blog/journal private, and nobody has to know, but it will still serve the same purpose.

Having an open mind when undertaking such a task is not only helpful, it's necessary.

Letters from an American

That's all I've got.

Bloomington, Minnesota Thomas Jefferson Class of 1975 50-Year Reunion

2025-09-13T21:50:00.013-05:00

I didn't attend any of my high school reunions until our 25th in 2000. Our 50th was last weekend. For our 10th reunion, I was so out of the loop that I didn't realize we were having one. I found out about it while watching the Johnny Carson Show, where one of Johnny's guests, Teresa Ganzel, mentioned it. Teresa was a regular on his program, and although I recognized her from some appearances she had made in film and on The Tonight Show, I didn't realize she was the same young woman who used to walk past our home on Saturday mornings on her way to drama practice at the high school we both attended. I knew her as Terry Ganzel in high school, but in her professional life as an actress, she went by Teresa Ganzel, with a different emphasis placed on the last syllable of her last name.

Johny asked her what she had done the previous weekend, and she replied that she attended her 10-year high school reunion in Bloomington, Minnesota—a 1975 graduate of Bloomington Jefferson high school, as was I. It clicked for me then that she was a classmate of mine.

Part of our 50th reunion last weekend was a tour of our high school. I had been there once since graduation, about 15 years ago for a dance competition Rachel was participating in, but I was limited in how much of the inside of the school I could see. I enjoyed the tour very much. Here are a few photos I took.

(I was a mediocre student, never reaching my potential. There was an excellent education to be had at Jefferson, but I was too immature to see that and take advantage of it. I regret that now.)

Saturday evening's reunion was a very nice time. I had several lengthy conversations with classmates, which cut into my time for visiting with others, but such is the nature of these gatherings. I stayed until last call and wished I'd had a few more hours to spend chatting.

Charlie Kirk, podcaster and right-wing provocateur, was shot and killed a few days ago while speaking with students on the campus of Utah Valley University. President Trump took to the airwaves to spew hate and divisive speech to those who can't get enough of his lies and, without any proof, blamed the killing on "radical leftists." It wasn't. Late yesterday, a 22-year-old man from Utah, steeped in conservative and MAGA politics, confessed to the killing. Apparently, Kirk wasn't conservative enough for him.

And so it goes.

I don't take pleasure in Kirk's death. Still, better him—a man who routinely pushed for an armed society, and stated that deaths by guns of innocent people are a price worthy of paying for our 2nd Amendment right to bear arms—than someone like me who would rather we do more to contain this scourge, like the rest of the developed world does.

Kirk is being memorialized by conservatives as a beacon of virtue. He was not.

Dan McClellan responding to Charlie Kirk on Christian Nationalism.

The founder of Supertramp, Rick Davies, died one week ago of cancer. Rick was 81. I first heard of Supertramp in the summer of 1974 while driving with my friend John in his Plymouth Duster, listening to Crime of the Century on John's 8-track player. One of my favorite songs by Rick is Rudy, from Crime of the Century, a masterpiece of an album!

That's all I've got.

Ten Years After

2025-09-03T10:20:00.002-05:00

Today marks ten years since my mother's passing, ten years since having the hearing in my left ear restored, and ten years since I retired. It feels fitting to make mention of it. The years are passing by so fast in my life now. I recall how my four year enlistment in the Navy seemed to play out at a pedestrian pace, but now, four years gets away from me in such a hurry. And this train just keeps rolling down the tracks faster with each passing year.

Here's a blog post I wrote where I talk about that day ten years ago. Until Tammy's recent brush with death, it was the most emotion-filled day of my life.

Tammy continues to work to regain her strength from a cardiac arrest event 2 1/2 weeks ago. She was discharged from transitional care on Saturday. Her ribs are still very sore, and she's extremely tired from some meds she's taking for her heart. It's going to take time before she feels normal again. Oscar and Rudy are happy to have her home.

Cliff loves his balance bike, and recently learned how to steer it around corners, but he's still working on not running over PJ. It's so fun to watch him ride it.

I made it out with friends on Labor Day for a 48 mile (77 km) ride on some beautiful gravel roads south of Northfield. I did okay but I'm still lacking strength, and struggled at times to keep up with Bruce and Tim who did some soft-pedaling for me when needed. (I have to remind myself that I'm riding faster than I have in a few years, so there is that.) I was thankful for the offer to ride with them again as it's been a couple of years since we last rode together.

That's all I've got.

Every Day is a Bonus Day

2025-08-27T20:35:00.008-05:00

We had a scare, but I'd like to begin by saying that Tammy will be okay. She woke me up at 4:35 on Saturday morning (11 days ago), saying, "I can't breathe, call 911!" She repeated it at least twice more. I hurriedly called 911 and explained to the dispatcher what was happening—what little Tammy could tell me and what I could observe. They continued to ask questions about Tammy and her condition. I explained the best I could, having only just awakened, while pleading with them to please hurry. Time seemed to crawl as we waited for help to arrive. I paused the 911 operator and ran to disarm our alarm and prop open the front door to save the arriving help whatever precious seconds I could.

A Lakeville Police Department officer arrived shortly after Tammy appeared to lose consciousness. He announced his presence at the front door, and I yelled for him to come up the stairs. He hurried up the ten stairs to our bedroom and stood assessing the situation for a few seconds. He bent down and asked me to help put some pillows under Tammy's head, but before we could do that, he said, "We need to do CPR." Just as he began the compressions, paramedics from Allina Health arrived to take over. I stood in the room opposite where they were working; everything seemed surreal. After a short time, an officer called me out of the room to ask me some questions about Tammy's age and such. He may have needed the information, but he no doubt didn't want me to witness what was happening.

We made our way downstairs while the paramedics worked to restart Tammy's heart with a combination of defibrillator paddles and a LUCAS device that performs chest compressions. I don't know how one is supposed to feel when they're in shock, but I felt numb and a little outside my body. I stood at the island in our kitchen and spoke with one of the officers, answering his questions. I excused myself to phone our friends across the street, Mark and Becky, to let them know what was happening and ask if they could come over to be with me. Not many minutes later, I saw them carrying Tammy out, not on a stretcher, but supported by what seemed like a blanket/tarp with straps for hand-holds on either side.

I don't remember closing up our home; I just walked with Becky outside to their house across the street, where Mark was backing their car out. The ambulance sped ahead of us as we left the neighborhood for the ten-minute drive to Ridges Hospital ER. Thank you to whoever closed up our home.

I won't go into all of the details of what happened in the moments and hours that followed, but I can say this: Lakeville PD and Allina paramedics did an outstanding job of saving Tammy's life. She flatlined twice between our home and while in the ER. They performed CPR on her for approximately 25 minutes, giving her 10 shots of epinephrine during that time as they worked to restart and stabilize her heart. As I look back on the heroics they went through, I can't help but think that another team might have given up and not saved her. But they continued to work to save her, and they did. We're forever grateful. We plan to visit the Lakeville PD to speak with them in person and to find a way to personally thank the paramedics from Allina Health for all they did, as soon as Tammy is up for it.

Tammy was intubated for a little more than two days and in the ICU for three days before being moved to a standard hospital room. She has since relocated to a Transitional Care Unit (TCU) at Masonic Home in Bloomington as she works with physical therapists to regain her strength and to be overseen by medical staff before she comes home.

The doctors said her heart wasn't the reason for her cardiac arrest. It showed no signs of blockage, and her arteries showed no plaque buildup. What they think might have happened is that she may have coughed or choked on her phlegm, which in turn set off a cascading event that led to her heart losing its electrical signal and being unable to reestablish it on its own. But they can't be sure. A doctor doing a follow-up with her yesterday assured her that this was a freak event and to not dwell on the thought that it may happen again. That's reassuring, but not entirely comforting.

Her recovery has gone so well that a good friend of ours visiting with her today told me that, had he not known, he would never have known that she recently went through something so traumatic. She's made a truly miraculous recovery.

I can't express how relieved, happy, grateful, and thankful I am to have her back. She means the world to me. For some of us, we can't appreciate how much we love and care for someone until we nearly lose them. I now look at each day with Tammy as a bonus day in our lives together.

The second chance we've been given is priceless.

That's all I've got.

Road Bike Action and a Debate Worth Watching

2025-07-22T21:24:00.007-05:00

I finally went for a ride on my road bike last night for the first time since last summer. I've been content to ride my gravel bike until now because it allows me to unclip from the pedals more easily, placing less lateral force on my right knee than I experience when unclipping from my road bike pedals. (My nephew just reminded me that I can adjust the pedal for the amount of force it takes to unclip.) I nearly forgot how much fun it is to ride this bike—how nimble and responsive it is. It was a shorter ride of only 24 miles (39 km), but I had so much fun and returned home amped about my ride. More of this, please.

One thing I noticed right away from my Favero Assioma power meter pedals was how much less power I'm generating with my right leg compared to my left. The data indicate that my left leg accounts for 60% of my power output, while my right leg accounts for 40% (approximately the same as before surgery). This is despite my focus on trying to involve my right leg more in the pedal stroke, suggesting it's likely worse unless I'm focused on power distribution. This is actually a hopeful sign because once I'm able to engage my right leg more, I'll generate more power and speed. I need to be cautious with my right knee the day after I push myself somewhat hard on my bike, as it feels a little sore and unstable the next day. (These notes about my knee are mostly for me as I document my recovery from knee replacement surgery last November, but feel free to follow along.)

I was hoping to resume walking the links when I golf at Valleywood tomorrow, but after hiking Lebanon Regional Park last Sunday, it's clear that I'm still not ready for the hills over a full round of 18 holes. I do fine walking on flat surfaces and inclines, but downhills are a more difficult challenge. Typically, I use a challenge like that to build strength, but I'm struggling enough with my game on the links as it is. I'll continue to rent a riding cart for at least the next few weeks.

Speaking of golf, I had a golf lesson today with a teaching pro that I've been working with for nearly a year. His approach to the swing is foreign to me (it's a more outside-to-in swing path, whereas my normal swing is inside-to-out), but I'm beginning to see the fruits of his efforts. I was close to giving up on his swing style toward the end of last year, but I'm sticking with it. Today's lesson was humbling, but I'm eager to apply what I learned today on the links tomorrow. Our former neighbor, Bob, is in town and will be part of our foursome. I'm looking forward to catching up with him.

The video below is disturbing to watch, but I think it's important to hear what conservatives, especially youthful conservatives, are saying. There's an abundance of racist and authoritarian sentiments in their words. If you're at all concerned about the direction our country's leadership is taking us, these individuals will provide an unfiltered lens into it. Mehdi Hasan does well to remain calm throughout the debate.

The second video I'm sharing is from this afternoon's chat with Heather Cox Richardson. She's a clear and thoughtful voice in these sad and worrying times.

The third video is an acknowledgment of the passing of rock legend Ozzy Ozborn, who led Black Sabbath. Ozzy passed away today. Although I'm not a big fan of Black Sabbath, I loved their Technical Ecstasy album.

That's all I've got.

Gotcha Anniversary and More

2025-07-13T19:46:00.005-05:00

The odometer on my 2014 Subaru Forrester turned over 100,000 miles (160,934 km) this week. There are a few small areas of light rust that will probably be full-blown rust spots in a few years. I don't have plans to address them, but I may rethink that. I don't usually purchase extended warranties, but I made an exception for this car. The warranty is a lifetime warranty and has more than paid for itself already.

I've never been one for flashy, expensive cars. My only desire is that they roll me safely and relatively comfortably from place to place. My Forrester is my first vehicle with a temperature and directional gauge, so I'm living large. It's been a good car for me.

Last week, we celebrated Oscar and Rudy's first anniversary with us. They have fully wormed their way into our hearts and are enjoying family status. Their antics have us smiling and laughing at them throughout the day. We can't understand how anyone could abandon them the way they did by moving away and leaving the pups to roam free and fend for themselves. They're such resilient boys. We've never had a more talkative pup than Rudy, and I don't think I've ever had a more loyal pup than Oscar—he doesn't like to let me out of his sight. They both enjoy watching TV shows with nature settings, especially Rudy.

Here's a link to the Rochester Humane Society Facebook page where we adopted Oscar and Rudy. It's my favorite stop online for all of the happy adoption stories they post throughout the week. I wish we could adopt them all.

We had a scare last week when a neighbor's dog broke free from their yard's invisible fence and attacked Oscar. It all happened so fast and was unexpected, as we've literally walked past their home hundreds of times over the years with all of our pups, and never had any problems. Oscar is still wearing his cone for a few more days, but he's doing well. Mochi's owners didn't hesitate to offer to cover the cost of Oscar's vet bills. They're good people.

My riding and walking activities are progressing well, as I'm showing steady improvement in stamina with both. I'm still using a golf cart for golfing, but I plan to discontinue that soon (I still struggle walking downhill). I had my fastest walk of the year this morning, covering 5.78 miles (9.3 km) in 1:24:00 for an average pace of 14:32 per mile. I managed a pace of 13:50 for my 4th mile. This effort puts me well within the range of speed I had before my surgery. It's been a lot of work to get to this point, and for a while, somewhat all-consuming. I'm pleased and grateful for my progress.

I received a complimentary book in the mail a few days ago, a book that I was a minor contributor to. The author is a writer for the NYT and National Geographic, and like me, is also a cluster headache sufferer. He made a request to a forum a few years ago that I'm an occasional participant in, looking for personal accounts of how these headaches impact our lives and how we manage them when they appear. We spoke on the phone once or twice and exchanged some emails about my experiences with a condition I've had to contend with since my senior year of high school. I haven't had a chance to read it yet, but I hope to do so this coming week.

We finally made it back to Cruise Night a couple of nights ago with Mark and Becky. It's been years since we attended the annual event, which is part of Lakeville's Panoprog (Panorama of Progress) celebrations. I'm glad we made it, as it also gave us a chance to check out our friend Dhruv's band, Five Day Forecast, who were playing a gig there at an outdoor venue at a downtown bar.

I worry that we're becoming desensitized to the inhumaneness of Trump's administration, and I fear that our mainstream media outlets are both failing us and becoming obsolete. People have confined themselves to media outlets that tell them what they want to hear, leaving many woefully ignorant about what is actually happening. The Big Beautiful Bill, recently signed into law with no support from Democrats, is a prime example. The bill will strip healthcare from tens of millions of people and defund programs designed to help the most vulnerable, to provide substantial tax savings for the wealthiest among us.

The bill allocates an obscene amount of funding for Trump's unmasked and unidentified thugs to assault and haul people away with little to no due process, all in the name of preventing illegal immigration. However, many of the people they're targeting are here legally. Trump and those he's placed in charge of these unlawful practices say they're going after the "worst of the worst," but there's no truth in that. They're primarily targeting people with no criminal record who are appearing in court for scheduled hearings on their immigration status; they're going after day laborers as they congregate at places like Home Depot looking for work; they're handcuffing parents as they attend their children's graduation ceremonies at school—all regular activities of law-abiding people trying to live their lives. And they're arresting and spiriting away people who have served in our armed forces who are here legally.

This is fascism.

The part of this that troubles me greatly is that it's Christians at the forefront of this harsh treatment of the immigrants among us. They should be the last people to involve themselves in this cruelty, but they're cheering it on. Evidently, the latter verses from Matthew 25 are missing from Trump's bible.

Letters From an American

That's all I've got.

The F Word

2025-06-13T19:15:00.029-05:00

When Trump walked out onto Lafayette Square in Washington, DC, in June 2020, in the wake of the George Floyd protests and after having a peaceful gathering of people broken up by tear gas, he stood in front of St. John's Episcopal Church and held up an upside-down bible—a prop. He didn't quote any scripture from it. He just held it in his tiny hands.

It was then that I began referring to him as a fascist.

For the most part, then, he had people in his orbit who kept him reigned in from his more fascistic tendencies. Later, retired U.S. Army Gen. Mark Milley would say former President Trump is "a fascist to the core." Other senior staff in Trump's administration echoed the same concern. None of those people (respected people with decades of experience) are part of his administration anymore, and it shows.

It should be clear to anyone paying attention to the destructive moves Trump's administration has made since his inauguration that fascism has arrived here.

A disturbing event occurred yesterday when California Senator Alex Padilla (D) attempted to ask a question of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem during a press conference she was holding. He was doing his oversight as the ranking member of the Judiciary Committee's Subcommittee on Immigration, Citizenship, and Border Safety. She ignored him while her security needlessly assaulted him by throwing him to the ground and handcuffing him in a disturbing act of authoritarianism.

If you've ever wondered what fascism looks like, what happened to Senator Padilla is but one example. Other examples include:

A lack of due process, such as we're seeing with the warrantless arrests and lengthy detentions of people suspected of being here illegally.
Masked unidentified men pulling people out of cars, arresting people walking with their children, arresting innocent people just living their lives, taking them and stuffing them in a van with no official warrant, and speeding off.
Book bans and the elimination of and the rewriting of our country's history, such as is happening all across the country where Republicans hold power.
Demonizing immigrants, saying nonsense like, "They're eating the cats! They're eating the dawgs!" or constantly labeling them as criminals, rapists, and killers when they're less likely to get into trouble with the law than are U.S. born citizens. That's a fact.
Attacking the media. Trump's routine claims of "fake news" have had the desired effect as his followers appear to be in lockstep to discount factual reporting in favor of conspiracy nonsense. It's not hard to find examples of media conglomerates caving to Trump as they pay millions in extortion fees to keep their licenses. (That's actually what's happening and is not a stretch to state it that way.)
A showy use of our military, such as the parade Trump has planned for tomorrow, when our military apparatus will roll down the streets of D.C., tearing them up in an embarrassing and expensive display akin to something Russia, China, or North Korea does. (I'm thrilled to see a 70% chance for thunderstorms in the D.C. area for tomorrow to hopefully rain on Trump's parade.)
Propaganda. Our country is awash in disinformation, and it's predominantly on the right as conservative media networks such as Fox (link to $787.5 billion judgment against Fox for lying to their viewers), podcasters (link to report of Russia paying right-wing U.S. influencers to spread lies), and elected officials, including Trump, literally parroting Russian talking points, while waging nonstop culture wars that keep us from ever coming together as a unified country.
Undermine faith in elections. I never imagined people being so gullible as to believe Trump's claims that the 2020 election was stolen from him, but they were and they are that gullible.
Approving of violence enacted on the leader's behalf. Trump's pardons of 1600 convicted felons who attacked our Capitol on January 6th, 2021, are a glaring example.
Corruption at the highest levels. There's never been a pay-to-play presidency of the kind we're seeing now. Trump has raked in hundreds of millions, perhaps a billion or more dollars, as he assembles obscure deals leveraging his position as president. He's also profiting greatly through cryptocurrency, a market he deregulated and removed oversight of. Also, Trump's pardoning of criminals who are wealthy enough to pay him an exorbitant fee is highly corrupt.
Attacking science, and in the process, defunding vital ongoing research that has been years in the making, such as cancer research and Alzheimer's research, and so many other areas of research that benefit not only us but the world.
Attacking the judiciary. Republicans are threatening to remove judges they disagree with. The Department of Justice has been thoroughly compromised under the leadership of Pam Bondi as Attorney General. She's a rubber stamp for Trump and acting as his personal revenge attorney as she targets people who stood up to Trump, with Miles Taylor and Chris Krebs being two examples.
Consolidate executive power. This is happening in an insidious way as Trump fills important appointments with people who lack the qualifications needed for the appointment but will do whatever Trump asks of them, even if it's illegal—it's why he chose them. He has also fired career federal workers and replaced them with individuals loyal to him.
Marginalizing and demonizing those in the queer community. There's been a ridiculous assault on transgender people relatively recently—a community of people who make up less than 1% of the population.
Attacking diversity. I've never imagined an attack of the kind that conservatives are waging on DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) programs and policies as we've witnessed since Trump took office again. Mentions of prominent people of color and women who have made significant contributions to our history are being removed from the Library of Congress and other institutions.
Attacking our institutions of higher education. There has been an assault on these institutions with threats to withhold funding unless they clamp down on the free speech of students who hold views that the administration disagrees with. Some universities have had their research grants rescinded unless they agree to eliminate any references to DEI.
Economic policies that benefit the wealthy and corporations at the expense of everyone else. Our system has been massively corrupted by a few individuals with malicious intentions, who have no lack of money to fuel propaganda and fund their chosen candidate to carry out their desires—desires that don't benefit the rest of us.
Embracing of Christian Nationalism—an ugly form of Christianity that lacks any sort of Jesus.
Taking away human rights, especially a woman's right to make her own bodily decisions. Suppressing minority votes through a variety of means. Trying to eliminate Birthright Citizenship from our Constitution. (And, speaking of the Constitution, it's still missing from the White House website. Enter a search for it in the box that comes up in the link to see for yourself.)

The list could be longer, but I believe it gives an idea of what it looks like to live under a fascist regime. We're there, and it will get worse if we allow it.

How long before we can no longer exercise our 1st Amendment right to free speech or to publicly assemble in protest? Will I have to delete my blog because I'm critical of Trump? Will I have to delete my social media accounts? Because I'm a dissenter, will they come after my pension? These are things I actually think about. I hate to have to say that, but this is what we are becoming, and for some, it's already thrown their lives into upheaval.

Now is the time to let your voice be heard. Stand up for your family, your community, and your country, because this doesn't end well for us if we don't take that opportunity while we still can. There is a nationwide protest rally tomorrow called No Kings. Tammy and I will be attending the gathering planned for Northfield. Go to the link to find a No Kings protest near you to stand with others and be counted among those who are horrified by the direction Trump and his MAGA Party are taking us.

If you ever look back on important moments in our nation's history, such as civil rights legislation, and wonder how you would have responded or whose side you would have taken, we're in one of those moments.

There will be a right side to this history. Will you be on it?

That's all I've got.

Working My Way Back To Me

2025-06-03T21:21:00.009-05:00

Rudy and Oscar have been with us for 11 months. Because they were strays, I sometimes wonder how they came to be abandoned. The scenario I've thought makes the most sense is that their original owners moved out of wherever they were living at the end of May and turned Oscar and Rudy loose when they left. They may have been on their own for a week or two before some kind person was able to get them and take them to the Humane Society. They were initially adopted by a woman, but she returned them after five days. They were probably too much for her. That's when we were contacted. Because I'm curious about where they were left to wander, I asked the Rochester Humane Society if they could provide us with an address for where they used to live. They're unable to divulge that information. I get that. It was worth a try.

I've been a member at Planet Fitness for not quite a year. It's such a good value, and it's never overly crowded when I'm there. It feels great to say that I'm a regular at the gym again after being away for too many months recovering from knee replacement surgery (I'm sure you're all tired of hearing about this, but I make these notes for myself). I had to ease back into it, as I had lost a noticeable amount of strength during my time away. However, I'm making progress again as I work to return to the level I was at last November. I try to get to the gym three times a week.

I had a breakthrough walk this afternoon. My goal since beginning rehab was to complete a walk at a pace of less than 15 minutes per mile. I did that today with a 5.77-mile (9.3 km) walk at a pace of 14:48 per mile. I had to focus to keep my speed up, and I did. Before surgery, I generally walked at a pace of around 14:20 per mile.

I have a new wallpaper on my phone. A photo of Cliff and me taken on Mother's Day. It makes me smile each time I look at my phone and see him sitting next to me with his little hand on my pants pocket.

I've limited my riding to rides on my gravel bike for now. I plan to be on my mountain bike riding the river trails later this summer, but I'm not ready for them yet. Riding more technical trails, such as Murphy and Lebanon, will have to wait until next year.

I have a friend who's taking over for me, giving trishaw rides to the residents at the assisted living facility in Farmington. The trishaw bike is an e-bike, but given the load I sometimes carry on it, it can be more than I'm ready to push for now. It's mostly a matter of strength at this point. I can push my new knee hard when I'm cycling and not feel any pain in it. It's an odd feeling to not have pain in my right knee. I try not to overdo it, though.

I went out for a 47-mile (76 km) gravel ride on Memorial Day. It was such a nice day to be riding gravel roads, and it felt good to be doing something I've missed doing regularly for too long. I have two new pieces of technology accompanying me on my rides: a new Insta360 Ace Pro 2 front-facing camera and a Garmin Varia radar/light combination for the rear of my bike. I'm very impressed with the Varia. If I had any criticism, it would be that I would like it to give me a heads-up a little sooner. I'm accustomed to using a mirror that allows me to easily see traffic a quarter to half mile away, or even more. The Varia notifies me of overtaking traffic at 153 yards (140 meters) away. But I like it.

Letters From an American

Politics Chat with Heather Cox Richardson.

That's all I've got.

Happy Easter, a Tale of Two Men, and a Whistleblower Speaks

2025-04-20T18:56:00.007-05:00

It's Easter Sunday. In my previous life, I would have been rubbing elbows with the faithful at Hosanna this morning while listening to a condensed sermon from one of four or more services they would hold to be able to accommodate the demand of the C and E (Christmas and Easter) crowd. I used to love Hosanna—the convenience of its location, the meaning I would take away from the sermons, and the grounds (I used to mow the lawn at the church). I knew it was the right place for me at that time. I wrote about what I felt, and still feel, was a God experience the first time I attended a service there. It's an interesting read if you have the time. But it wouldn't last. Many years later, I would have a falling out with the lead pastor, and that left me disillusioned with organized religion. It's where I remain today. It too is an interesting read.

I still see Easter as a time of renewal; a time to reevaluate my life and consider changes I can make to be a better person. I don't need a religion or belief system to do that, but my Christian roots still influence me in much of what I do. I'm in a far different place today, due to the politicization of the church at large, which caused me to question the authenticity of the religion. I was moving in that direction before MAGA people came along, but they caused me to speed up my departure.

I believe God exists, but I no longer subscribe to the belief that the God of the Christian bible is the true God. I cannot say for sure–none of us can, no matter how much we believe we can. I'm agnostic these days, and mostly believe that there is a non-denominational higher power that I can't begin to describe with any certainty. It would be a big step for me to claim atheism. I don't see that ever happening. I believe we will all be stunned by how wrong we are in our beliefs when we breathe our last breath.

Having said all that, I wish those who celebrate a happy Easter.

Joe Biden often said he was "fighting for the soul" of our nation, and he was right to frame it that way. He was a good president and man; he wasn't perfect, but most people would love his steady leadership again if they're honest with themselves. I know I would. This was Biden's Easter message from one year ago, and this was Trump's from today. See the difference?

One man is a man of decent character while the other is a racist rapist who had to pay his victim, E. Gene Carroll, $83,300,000. One man is of decent character, while the other had to pay $350,000,000 for running a criminal enterprise called Trump Org. One man is of decent character, while the other was fined $25,000,000 for running a sham university and ripping off its students. One man is of decent character, while the other was fined $2,000,000 for stealing from his fake charity. See the difference?

The illegal deportations by Trump of immigrants without due process have been dominating the news. It's important because, without the eyes of the media focused on this illegal activity by our criminal president, it's only a matter of time before U.S.-born citizens that he deems an 'enemy of the state' will be targeted for deportation to whatever hellhole of a prison in whatever dictator-led country Trump can find to accept them.

There have been and will continue to be protest marches in cities nationwide in the weeks and months ahead. Tammy and I will be attending whenever we can.

Other news deserves attention, but it's had scant coverage. NPR reported earlier this week about Trump's DOGE (Department of Government Efficiency) stooges infiltrating the NLRB (National Labor Relations Board) and accessing sensitive data maintained there, some of it related to criminal cases that had been brought against Elon Musk, the person in charge of DOGE.

Rachel Maddow interviewed the whistleblower within the NLRB (from the NPR article) a few nights ago. Daniel Berulis described some nefarious activity that should concern us all. One of the more disturbing claims he made was how someone taped to his front door a threatening message with recent aerial photos of him walking his dog. He had only lived in his current residence for two months, but they knew where to find him. He wasn't deterred. He said his knowledge is too valuable to not elevate it. He knows of others in various agencies experiencing the same kind of data breaches, but they're afraid to come forward out of fear of retaliation. Daniel finished the interview by saying, "Fear and apathy are the death of democracy."

Please take the time to watch the interview below.

That's all I've got.

Cliff Notes, Free From Therapy, and Moving Toward Authoritarianism

2025-04-15T18:50:00.024-05:00

Cliff has learned to turn light switches on and off and control the dimmer switch from his perch atop his highchair. In the few weeks he's been walking, he's become very fast on his feet, no longer walking like he's inebriated but with purpose to his steps. It's been so much fun watching him grow and become himself. Rachel and Drew occasionally send us videos and photos of Cliff throughout the week, and they always bring smiles to our faces.

We had fun with friends a few nights ago using ChatGPT to make our own personal action figures (a social media craze I wasn't aware of). Our results! Use the script in my Instagram post to make your own. Part of the fun was the wait for the program to render the result, which usually took a few minutes, and then the laughter that followed.

I was released from physical therapy for my knee three weeks ago today after being a regular there for ten months (most of those months were for pre-hab ahead of my surgery). My doctor also gave me the green light to resume my life and activities, and he said there's no need for additional follow-ups. I still have much rehab ahead of me, but I've got it from here forward.

I'm becoming more active each week. I rode outdoors last weekend for the first time since before surgery. My knee feels fine under a moderate load, but anything more than moderate causes me to immediately back off. I'm still unable to pedal out of the saddle, something typically done when cycling up steeper climbs. I will have to do better about salting in more off days in my schedule where I allow my legs to recover. Yesterday and today are off days for me as I've been overdoing my activities, and one day of rest isn't enough for now.

Tammy and I went to the Capitol in St. Paul via the light rail a couple of Saturdays ago to join 25,000 others to protest Trump's administration and their trashing of our essential agencies and institutions. When we reached the Capitol, our rail car was packed beyond capacity, with many others joining the demonstration. We feel it's important to add our presence to these events while they're still allowed—but even when they try to stop us, and they will, we'll still be showing up. I guarantee it.

We've crossed the Rubicon into that of a lawless society with Trump's administration—most notably when Trump pardoned 1600 January 6th, 2021, insurrectionists and freed them from prison, referring to them as hostages while sending a clear message that if you perpetrate violence on his behalf, he's got your back. He now stands in defiance of a SCOTUS ruling that he return an innocent man from a hell-hole of an El Salvadoran prison that he was illegally sent to by Trump—a county he's been granted asylum from out of fear for his life. Trump is refusing to have him returned even though he was here legally, is married to a U.S. citizen, and has three children, one of which is autistic, say nothing of the SCOTUS ruling.

Once Trump ignores a ruling by SCOTUS, where does that leave us? Key to the foundation of our form of democracy are the three equal branches of government that ensure a system of checks and balances essential for our government to function as it should. If Trump goes rogue and ignores the judiciary (he's already effectively neutered the legislative branch), we're no longer a democracy. There's no other way to say it. That begs the question: Does our 2nd Amendment right have a role to play in how we respond to a tyrant? As Tucker Carlson was so fond of saying, I'm only asking the question.

The only realistic pressure we can bring to bear is our numbers—numbers so significant that elected officials, even in heavily gerrymandered districts, won't be able to ignore them. The threat of being primaried will pale compared to the threat of people voting them out. That's why protest marches/rallies are now as crucial as ever. If you care about keeping this grand experiment of ours alive for your children and grandchildren, please join us and make yourself heard. Use your voice while you still can because the last thing you'll want on your mind if we lose our democracy is that you were quiet as it all was shattered. That's not something I'd like to live with.

If you limit yourself to conservative media sites, what I'm saying here will sound like hyperbole. It's not. Please become informed and involved. It's much easier to lose your freedoms than to get them back. Be sure of that.

For those who care, the Constitution is still missing from the White House website, having been removed in the first hours of Trump's presidency.

Letters from an American

That's all I've got.

Baby Steps, Seeing Clearly, and VOA

2025-03-21T17:25:00.004-05:00

Cliff took his first official steps last week! He had been taking some baby steps with the aid of furniture, keeping in touch with it as he worked his way around a room, but these steps were unaided. Talking can't be too far behind. Rachel, Drew, Cliff, and PJ spent a night with us last weekend. At one point, I counted more than 40 continuous unaided steps by Cliff. Impressive! We're loving our role as grandparents!

Oscar and Rudy have been with us for nearly nine months. We feel blessed to have them sharing their lives with us. Like all of our pups before them, they've wormed their way into our hearts in a big way. We have so much love for them. I tell them they're not just loved; they're "super loved!" I often think about how they beat the odds to remain together when they were strays and found their way to us. We're grateful.

Rehab for my knee is ongoing, and I'm pleased with how far I've come, considering how difficult my recovery has been. Before my manipulation under anesthesia (MUA) on January 13th, my range of motion (ROM) was stuck at 68°. I've steadily increased that to 117°, which gives me all of the ROM I'll need for cycling and walking. After the MUA (where he got me to 130° of bend), my doctor told me I'd be doing well to maintain 110°-115°. I'm there, and I'm relieved.

I've been walking outdoors, doing a 3-mile (5-km) loop a few times a week as I work to build stamina in my knee. I get frustrated that my recovery rate hasn't been faster, but when I look back at where I was a few weeks ago, I'm encouraged by my progress. Somewhat against my better judgment, I went golfing with Steve last week at Emerald Greens, a mostly flat course. I only intended to play nine holes, and I was glad that's all I planned for. After two hours of walking the links, I was ready to return to my car and take a load off. My knee was tired and sore. I told Steve I'd wait a few weeks before trying again.

I've been wearing my new glasses for a week. I wanted to see how well the prisms (I spoke of in a recent update) in my new lenses would work to fix my issues with double vision. I couldn't be more pleased. I no longer see two TV screens while watching a program or two computer screens when using my laptop. I'm so impressed with how well they eliminated the problem. I feel stupid for not seeing an eye doctor sooner.

If it's not clear to everyone by now that our country's president is an unapologetic white nationalist, it should be. He's currently removing from our government archives any mention of remarkable achievements made by minorities throughout our nation's history. I'm talking about thousands of such references, all in the name of anti-DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) nonsense. He was elected because people were upset about inflation, disregarding that inflation had been brought down to less than 3% and that our economy was the envy of the developed world. Thanks to his ill-proposed tariffs, our economy is beginning to show signs of contraction. The stock market has been taking a beating as well, with the DOW down by 3.5% in the last month.

The red meat of late for Trump's MAGA base is hate speech directed at transgender people. They've been singled out for his ridicule as much or more than any other group, even though transgender people account for less than 1% of the population. If this sort of divisive culture war rallying cry appeals to you, please, be better. Our democracy is on life support, but hate for transgender people is what energizes the MAGA movement. This juvenile pettiness at the expense of serious internal threats to our republic will be our undoing. (No offense to juveniles.)

I'm sad for our country as I watch an ever-entrenched oligarchy take over the reins of our government and lurch it in a direction away from working for the benefit of the people and, instead, cede more power to the wealthy—power and influence that could leave millions without healthcare or meager Social Security retirement benefits. Unless Republican politicians grow a spine, those entitlements will likely be gutted and privatized. It won't end well for many millions—many of whom make up his base.

Voice of America was established in 1942 as an anti-propaganda outlet against Axis propagandists during World War II. It continued to provide news and information in nearly 50 languages to an estimated weekly audience of more than 354 million people until last Saturday when Trump shut it down. For my conservative friends, what did you think when you learned of that? Are you okay with that? VOA is a service meant to help those living under authoritarian oppression understand actual world news and not state-run propaganda. It's no surprise that this move did make some very happy.

It wasn't enough that he turned friends and families against one another; now Trump has turned Canada against us.

Are you seeing a pattern yet? If not, please try harder.

Letters from an American

Wishes for an enjoyable weekend.

That's all I've got.

What are We Waiting For?

2025-03-04T09:12:00.002-06:00

Serious question: now that all aid to Ukraine has been halted, and in light of all of the capitulations Trump has made to Russia — shutting down early warning agencies; halting intelligence gathering aimed at Russia; turning our backs on our allies; talk of removing sanctions on Russia; placed stooges in prominent roles; removed critical oversight, did I mention turning our backs on our allies as well as relinquishing our role as leader of the free world, etc. — how long will it be before Trump moves to help arm Russia? It’s terrifyingly shocking, but this is where we find ourselves.

Trump Is clearly acting on Putin’s behalf. Sorry to be blunt, but it takes a whole other level of gullibility not to open your eyes and mind to the possibility that you’ve been conned if you’re still supporting this pretender. We are watching the dismantling of our country and, with it, our democracy, our freedoms, and our way of life.

What are we waiting for?

That's all I've got.