Our Adoption Journey

Happy 2nd Birthday Hope

2012-07-15T20:45:00.001-04:00

Dear Hope,

You turned 2 today. We had a party for you and you had no clue it was your birthday. Even when you blew out your candles and opened your presents, you still had no idea.

I ordered a special birthday outfit for you and you were less than thrilled to put it on!

Happy Birthday Hope. We hope next year you know just how special you are! You are SO loved!

Happy 3rd Birthday!

2012-05-30T18:06:00.002-04:00

Dear R2,

I can't believe you are three. You have been SUCH a joy to me for the last three years. You are funny, sweet, smart and totally adorable. You know all your letters and colors and are completely potty-trained. You LOVE Thomas and Cailou! You decided on a Thomas party and loved your cake. Whenever I would ask what you wanted for your birthday, you would say "Thomas cake". When I asked what you wanted for your birthday breakfast, you said "Thomas cake".

You are still my little Boo and I love that you are growing into a sweet little boy but I just wish you would grow a little slower.

Happy Birthday, R2. You are so loved.

Painted toes

2012-05-20T07:22:00.001-04:00

Guess who has painted toes?

Hope's First Easter

2012-04-09T13:07:00.000-04:00

We had such a nice Easter. It was Hope's first Easter! Last Easter, I remember showing her picture to the whole family. So nice to have her home.

We dyed Easter eggs which she liked. She cracked a few by ~~throwing~~ gently placing them in the dye cups.

She hunted eggs and then hunted them again but it was hard convincing her to give them up. She clearly thought they were her eggs.

Steff

Happy 5th Birthday!

2012-03-17T20:02:00.001-04:00

Dear R1,

HAPPY Birthday! I just can't believe you are five. You were born in the middle of the night(222AM) and instead of crying you looked around for two straight hours. You were such a good baby and you continue to be such a good son. You are growing up and learning what it means to be a good friend.

You chose to spend the night at a local pool and have some good family time instead of a party with your friends. We just got back from that fun time and you had a blast! You swam everywhere and laughed!

You are truly such a blessing! Your smile lights up the entire room!

Happy Birthday sweet boy! We love you!

Pig Tails!!!

2012-03-04T12:45:00.000-05:00

Her hair is finally long enough for pig tails.

Ok, I forced it a little, but I have been waiting 8 years(or my whole life) to do my daughter's hair..and she looked so cute!

I know they are a little off-center, but I did my best...and had so much fun!

Steff

3 months

2012-02-09T09:57:00.000-05:00

Dear Hope,

You've been in this 'ALL BOY' family for three months now! You are far from the dainty girl that I imagined. You fit right in with this rowdy and loud house!

Here are the things that have changed:
1. Instead of screaming when you are giving a hug, you readily give kisses to Mommy, Daddy, and some dolls.

2. Instead of hating your bath, you hear the word "bath" and you scream and run to get your clothes off. You can't get into the bath fast enough.

3. Instead of speaking babble, you know say Hi, Bye, All Done, Jester, Mama, Yia Yia. You also repeat all kinds of words. My favorite is awesome. You can say a mean awesome!

4. Instead of preferring Mommy for everything, you are now the apple of your Daddy's eye. You scream and run when you see him and demand to be picked up and snuggled.

5. Instead of having to really tickle you to get a smile, you give lots of smiles and big belly laughs readily.

6. Instead of having your 12m pants fall off of you, you are moving into 24m clothes and growing so tall!

7. Instead of having very thin, unhealthy hair, your hair is growing thick and beautiful.

You are doing so well Hope. We are totally in love with our little princess, even if you act more like a boy :) You do still love to dress pretty. If I give you a choice of clothes, you always pick the pretty dress!

We are working through eating and playing but you are learning us as your family. You and R2 fight less and love more! I caught you both giggling and laughing together on your bed. I can often find you right beside him doing whatever he is doing.

Hope, thank you for blessing our lives. We are so happy you are home!

Next weekend, we are doing a photo shoot with a great photographer through a wonderful NEW program called red thread sessions. I'm so excited!!

Steff

Snow!

2012-01-21T16:32:00.000-05:00

Hope ecperienced her first snow and sled ride and like anything different she said "NO WAY".

She had her surgery on the 10th and things are going ok. She is eating little bits of food, but still drinking her formula. She just doesn't care for any 'soft' foods.

She is doing really well though and we love experiencing all her firsts!

2 months

2012-01-08T09:32:00.000-05:00

Dear Hope,

You've officially been ours for 2 months! What a blessing you have been to our family! You have learned so much in those two months.

Instead of soothing yourself(in unhealthy ways), you cry when hurt.
Instead of screaming at bed time, you put your thumb in your mouth and fall to sleep on your own.
Instead of being underweight(at 19lbs), you've gained 3 pounds and are almost a healthy weight!
Instead of drinking 5 bottles, you are eating some solid food and completely on a sippy cup.
Instead of not knowing how to play with ANY toys, you love your stethoscope and to steal all of brothers trains.

You learn new things each day and we're so happy you're home with us!

Christmas

2012-01-02T09:04:00.000-05:00

Long past due post about Christmas!

Hope had a good time opening the presents! She liked the paper more than the gifts. She is still learning to play with the things and has little patience to figure out how things work.

Real life starts again tomorrow with medical appts, early intervention etc. It was nice to have a break from the medical things for a few days!

This week she has a consult with two surgeons and an evaluation with early intervention. On Tuesday, Jan 10th, she'll have her palate surgery. Please be in prayer for her.

A few fun Christmas photos!

Steff

gingerbread house

2011-12-21T16:03:00.001-05:00

We've been busy with medical appts and surgeries and follow ups!.The four kids finally together...

The Good News

1. Hope is doing really well. She's eating and sleeping well.

2. Shes learning new words and signs everyday.

3. She's so happy all the time.

4. Shes the sweetest little girl.

5. She's gained two pounds and grew an inch in one month.

The bad news

1. The surgery to unblock her tear duct didnt work...so we wait for follow up. It's tearing and gooping less but it is not normal.

2. She and R fight constantly.
3. She is still learning how to play with things and sit for a little bit. She never sits...

Today, C made a gingerbread house. Because he doesn't eat food dyes, it was slightly challenging...

Pretty good results, I think...

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!!

Steff

Cookies

2011-12-11T20:44:00.001-05:00

Cookie dough $4.00
Cookie decorations $12.00
Making cookies with my boys-priceless

One month

2011-12-07T19:51:00.000-05:00

We've had Hope for one month today! The last month has been so joyous and difficult! I am so happy to have this last month under our belt. I would not want to go back a month and do it all over again. Hope has come far in many aspects but has some major catching up to do still.

We found that she has a clogged tear duct so she will need surgery on that. Her surgery is next Tuesday. We also met with her cleft team and she will likely have surgery again in late jan/february.

Other than that, we are getting ready for Christmas. We are so excited for Hope's first Christmas!

Steff

How are things?

2011-11-27T22:18:00.002-05:00

Another adoptive parent wrote this. It's called after the airport and describes this part of journey.
On another note, there's an elf in the house!

Favorite food

2011-11-25T21:53:00.003-05:00

So, we're at a local Thanksgiving buffet and Steff asks to the table, who'd like this extra fried chicken leg? Hope extends her little hand out as far as it goes and leans so far forward that she's in danger of falling out. I really think hope was actually stunned that Steff then gave it to her. We were even more stunned, however, when she ate it. All. And then at family Thanksgiving buffet dinner number two :-)

She's been doing muuuuuch better with eating more and more foods, pbj being the recent favorite. She's not very neat, taking the trophy as the messiest kid in the house, the previous holder, our oldest, more than pleased to be passing that torch.
Sleeping is going much better. She fell asleep tonight with no one having to go back with her. The last few nights, we've sat in the room with her as she fell asleep, but it would seem she's beyond that.

Lastly, we hit target today around 10 am. One major realization: black Friday holds nothing on every day shopping in China. Not even close.

Brian

2 weeks later

2011-11-22T12:26:00.001-05:00

Well, its been two weeks and a day and how's she doing? She is doing well, on the whole. She is playing well, although often by herself. The older are too fast for her and r2 has lost patience with her and has become possessive... its been a learning process, but he's been doing well. Its been a lot of changes for him, but he's a real trooper and doesn't usually complain.

She enjoys rolling/bouncing a small ball back and forth, being tossed in the air, and bashing balloons.

The dogs are also not much of an issue either. She even pet the pug earlier today, then realized what she was doing and smacked him in the face instead. :-)

She's eating well as well. She just ate an entire pbj for lunch! That's been an uphill battle that we are slowly winning. Steff even managed to get three bites of banana yesterday, which she usually hates. She's not big on fruit. In fact, she won't eat any of it. Her favorites are anything starchy, breads, rice, etc. Steff is doing a really good job at being persistantbas well as trying different foods.

She and I went out this morning to get her blood work. It took 3 techs, one to hold her arm, one, o a age the needle, an one to manage the vials, all while I was holing her. She's a strong cookie :-) the good news? We'll probably have to go back next week, since she's so small and they can only take so much from her. Poor thing.

The bad news? She's stopped sleeping well. Rather, going to sleep well. One out, she typically has been doing well. I suppose its that she's comfortable enough to tell us that she's scared to be alone. We've trie night lights and all that and she shares a room with r2. What she wants is us in the room. I'm not a fan of Co sleeping, but we may have to try her in a pack and play for a few days until she's more comfortable. 2 nights ago she as up until midnight, which is probably also a factor of jet lag.

Please be in prayer for us, as going to sleep is very frustrating. Its situations like those that bring out the grouse in me and my family doesn't need to be the target of my pointless anger and frustration.

Also plz pray for Steff, as she isn't sleeping well. She's been waking around 2 and staying up until 5. Its starting to affect her health.

If i don't check in before then, have a great Thanksgiving everyone!! Thank you to everyone for your prayers and for your support with comments and even by simply reading the blog. Its very comforting to know that people are curious enough to want know what's going on and by taking an interest and the time to read he blog. I think that last sentence was worded poorly, but you know what I mean. :-)

Brian

Sleep

2011-11-21T02:58:00.001-05:00

Some rough sleep issues happening here. Hope did not fall asleep until 1130pm tonight and I am up since 1am. Pray that we can get some sleep and meet her needs without it taking us 3.5 hours each night. We desperately need some sleep.

Steff

Spelling

2011-11-20T06:19:00.001-05:00

So far all seems to be going well. She's doing much better with the dogs and the boys are continuing to dote over her, although some of that newness is wearing off. She was able to repeat 'all done yesterday, one of her first English words, the first being 'hi.'

Personally, Steff and I are doing well, but adjusting slowly back to the time. We seem to be taking turns at being up at nite, tonight being mine :-)

As for the trip, we're glad to be back, but also happy to share our stories, most of the major ones already being recorded here. For my Facebook friends, I posted an album of our trip.

There are a few things I missed about China, I'll put a few here:

1. Bfast consisted of eggs, bacon, sausage, toast, potatoes, mushrooms, omlettes, all at one sitting :-) is it any wonder I only ate two meals a day?

2. No where to be. Hotel rooms can be cramped and it happens from time to time that one person blocks the other. It was really nice being able to say to her apology, don't worry about it, I've got no where to be.

3. Guangzhou weather is awesome this time of year.

4. The last few days, it was nice to be able to talk with other families in the exact same stage of life. Its sort of like having a baby added to your family, but with a different set of challenges. Imagine if they came out walking, moving, eating, etc. but still had no language ability. They still cry a lot and sleep continues to be an issue with international adoptions because of the time change. Nor does she have the experiences that a normal 16 month would have: no idea what a car seat is, let alone a car, never seen a dog, we just learned today that dogs bark loudly, no concept for stairs, doesn't know what a book is, falls off of couches, thinks the word for 'more is to scream like the Tasmanian devil, has already seen, in the last two weeks, more different rooms than in her entire last year, doesn't like ice cream or apple juice, in short she's a lot like a grown up new born.

5. Lets go back to that buffet. They had the best mushrooms I've ever eaten and I'll never be able to get them again...grrrr

6. Water pressure. Our trickle of a faucet pales in comparison to the Chinese fire hose they call a shower. Its like washing with a power washer. Grunt.

7. Driving has become boring here. When I watch some poor sap slowly trying to pull out into traffic, while being careful not to offend other drivers or put any car t risk, I am reminded that we may have invented the car, but driving is being invented in other countries. I've seen two busses merge from opposite directions into the same lane with a car in between and all come out happy, with no trace of panic nor even concern in anyone's face. We don't know how to drive. They've mastered the merge and cut. They wait until the narrow gap appears between cars and in full, heavy traffic make a full 45 degree turn into that line, filling the space between cars. Now, as long as the other car stops, and the merging car pulls straight, after making he initial cut, all will be well. The maneuver works identically for busses and trucks, and doesn't produce that primal fear we all get think that a truck's trailer is going to merge right over my car. The mistake we make which causes that is too deep a turn into the opposite lane. 45 degrees, no more, then pull straight into the lane. Works great in a country that legally has to ground 1 7th of its drivers everyday due to over trafficking.

On a side note, I have been rightfully accused of horrific spelling on prior posts. Please first let me apologize, as I certainly want my posts to be easily legible and having a semblance, however slight, of common literacy. Secondly, by way of explanation, please let me explain that most of my posts have been made on a 7 inch tablet. If you've ever typed on one, you are aware that here is no comfortable way to do it for long periods of time, the best probably being to hold it in one hand while typing with the opposite index finger. This takes a while to do accurately, so i play a balance game between accuracy and speed, and sometimes as my neck and finger get tired, speed wins. :-) my apologies.

Brian

Up early

2011-11-18T03:40:00.001-05:00

Well, we're both up and it's around 3am. Should have taken an ambien I suppose. :-) One of the things I was thinking about while laying awake is all the things that went well, so I wanted to make a list of praises to share with you. (I did have one dream, I dreamt I was Troy Polomalu). I would like to point out too, that I am deliberately avoiding mentioning some of the more obvious points.

1. Despite that 5 of 6 flights had some kind of delay, they all left relatively on time and safely.

2. It's always a little concerning when you leave one city and come into another. You're wondering if anyone's going to be there to meet you. We were greeted happily by our guides, on time, in each city. We came to find out later that they were in constant communication with each other. They called the next one when they dropped us off and then called the previous one when they got us. We thought, until the end, that they were working independantly.

3. We had 3 very excellent guides. They were all very thorough, very pleasant, very helpful people.

4. After we entered China (which means that the pen debacle at the beginning doesn't count, since we hadn't technically entered into China yet through Border Patrol), we had zero problems, not one technical glitch. Everything worked out perfectly. Any potential problems were headed off long before they became anything to be concerned about. Literally, nothing went wrong.

5. We both had some stomach issues upon arriving that we associate with the time shift, as we both have them again now, but aside from that, no one got physically sick.

6. I was warned by a friend that Satan often likes to take your joy from you when you should be most joyful, and that warning included an exortation that I "get on my knees" on the weeks before heading over, that Satan would not use the stresses to drive a wedge between us, instead of letting us enjoy the time. While there were some stressful moments, we never fought, never argued.

7. The kids were in excellent hands back home. Thanks to all those who helped out!

8. We were so worried about the flight back and really super confused with God regarding why we were not issued a basinette, however His provision of an extra seat was far better and cheaper.

9. The flight home went as smoothly as possible.

10. We learned a lot about the local culture that we are able to share with her as she grows. While we don't necessarily want her to mimic the CHinese lifestyle 100%, we want her to know of it.

11. Despite that food that was edible was not readily available, we still were able to find healthy meals.

12. We were worried about not knowing how to feed her with her disability. This was not an issue.

13. She slept well.

There are probably more, which I'll think of as soon as I lie back down, but there it is for now. We are very aware that many of you were praying for us while we were gone, and we are very thankful. Please continue to pray for her acclamation into the family.. At this point, the kids love her and most is going well. The major concern here is the dogs. She hates them and can't be within 15 feet of them. We need wisdom as to how the handle the situation as you want to teach her that her needs will be met, at the same time we don't to teach her that she gets picked up everytime she sees a dog, which is often.

Thanks again!

Brian

We're home!

2011-11-17T22:01:00.001-05:00

I sent a brief report yesterday as to our arrival, but I wanted to send a little more detail about the return and how today went.

The flight went as well as possible. Hope allowed me to hold her, even sleeping in my arms at one stretch for 4 hours. There was more leg room this time, and Steff was able to eat all the food (as opposed to none of it one the way down). Praise God for this fantastic turn of events. It didn't look like it was going to go well, until we boarded and the stewardess and teh nice lady next to us teamed up to get is an open seat. We were actually pretty down when getting on the plane, thinking it was going to be miserable.

The mini-flight to our last airport was very bumpy. I even wondered if we were going to stay in the air, some of those chops were rough.

We had a good reunion and then drove home. Todd only needed to remind me once that we use lanes in the USA and I sleepily drove home. I'm sure he was more glad to be out of teh car than I was, it was a little rough at spots.

Anywya, in short, the kids adore her and she seems to really like being here. She and R2 played for quite some time today at the frigde with one of those leapfrog alphabet singing toys, R2 taking the time to try to show her how to use it. He was really cute yestrerday too at the airport. Once the crowds around her died down, he made his way over to the stroller, leaned in and introduced himself. "Hi! My name's R2!" The ony issue at present is the dogs. She is horrified. Petrified. She screams like they're eating her, though thye are 10 feet away. Even the pug is horrible. But other than that, all is going well. We are just adapting to the difference in parental management, learning about her, and all the little stuff in between. She has her doctors appt tomorrow, so we assume that all will go well.

Thanks again too all those who came to make her reunion, or union for the first timers in the party, a success!

-Brian

At newark

2011-11-16T21:34:00.001-05:00

This message won't post until I get home, but I wanted to let every one know we made it back to the states safely, we're just waiting for our local puddle jumper flight. This message won't send tho, until we're home. In short, the flight went much better than expected. We're extremely tired, its been 26 hrs since we've slept, (pray for Todd, as he's riding home in the car with me driving :-)

Hope did great. She was busy, of course, but slept through the last 4 or so hrs, along with a few shorter naps. We didn't get the bassinette e were hoping for, but God had better plans as the fantastic lady next to us gave up hers so we could have an entire row. I've never been so comfy on a fllight, never mind that it was 15 hrs. In short, praise God for as positive as flight as possible, and much better than we thought.

Hopefully we're able to get on the right plane, as we're having trouble performing the simpleest on tasks, such as calling on a cell. We're pretty zonked.

Unfortunately, this message won't send until we are home, so if you're reading it, it means we're home safe.

Leaving on a jet plane

2011-11-15T17:04:00.001-05:00

This begins our 25 hour journey home. Please pray for safe travels and that hope would be an angel in the travels. See everyone soon.

Preparing to leave

2011-11-15T03:56:00.001-05:00

Well, its our last day here, and I've got butterflies. I'm excited to be home, but I'm going to miss this time alone with Hope and Steff, both being excellent company.

Today, we went on a rather long walk to an old house, which is itself an art museum. The roof is made of sculpted clay and depicts scenes from folk history. The walls are all hand carved, dad you'd love it. They also have some ivory carvings, a tea house, in which time I spent much longer than the last, and even bought some of their jasmine tea and a mug that changes colors, I'm such a sucker.

Steff and Hope went up to follow jack through the local herbal market, where he told me what each of these do for your health. I remain impressed by his English, being able to carry on a very deep conversation. They sell all kinds of things, from dried sea horses, dried mushrooms, ginseng in over 100 varieties, and lizard on a stick. They keep snake in alcohol that they drink and make soup from scorpions, which they sell live.

We leave early tomorrow morning, so plz be in prayer for us, as the trip will be very long and we're really hooping for a bassinette, which can only be confirmed at counter.

Brian

Citizen!

2011-11-14T19:41:00.001-05:00

She's a citizen! Or so they say... there seems to be a difference in opinion over when it actually becomes official, but the leading voice seems to be when the lady at the us consulate goes stamp stamp. There a re remaining formalities, but legally she's a citizen. There's really nothing to say about the process. You go in, give your paperwork, they stamp, you go home. I'm just thankful we didn't have to go back to Chongqing to get or change something.

We finished much of our souvenir shopping as well. The ppl here expect you to barter, and I can never tell how badly I lose, its probably better that way. Went back to lucy's again, had Chinese this time shana, beef and basil stir fry.

Please be in prayer for us as we prepare for tomorrows flight. Also, we're pretty tired of being here, and we're both getting a little edgey.

Hope is doing very well, showing a lot more personality. She likes to wiggle and dance when she's eating something yummy. She's really enjoying life right now, which is great!

Today, we're off to an old house/art museum and an herbal market. Todd, Steff says I should buy you some dried sea horses, which apparently are an herb?!

Brian

Random thoughts

2011-11-14T06:24:00.001-05:00

1. Hope finally let brian give her a bottle. Major progress, folks.
2. Hypothetically speaking, if you clog the toilet twice they will send at least three people and then when they leave mutter something in Chinese as if we can understand.
3. The smell of fried squid makes my stomach churn.
4. The weather in Guangzhou rocks, sunny high 70s
5. I would pay big money for some breyers Icecream.
6. The buffet here has the best bananas and potatoes.
7. I really thought I would be sick the entire time we are here but I've been more healthy than at home.
8. Reading emails/comments from loved friends and families makes me cry each time.
9. Leaving the kids at home was the best choice but I miss them more than I could ever predict. I cannot wait to touch down in the USA.
10. Besides the obvious, I can't wait to have ice, eat a salad or use a fork. I can't wait to use dollars because every time I hand someone a 100 rmb I feel like its highway robbery until I remember its only $15. I can't wait to stop doing laundry in the sink and hanging it out the window,
11. Hope is the sweetest little girl and I still can't believe she was born half way around the world.

steff