masterwordsmith-unplugged

THE POLITICS OF LIES

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 05:58:00 +0000

Do you still read the news in MSM? I would not be surprised if your response is a firm 'NO' because many news reports do nothing positive for our sanity or blood pressure when we come face-to-face with some leaders to continue to cross the line with half- truths, falsehoods and outright lies after which there is an outburst of protests from citizens in the comments section and create fodder in coffee-shops.

As we swim through the sea of lies, we have to contend with news reports and statements which appear like a tightly woven woollen ball, each string pulled taut and tauter by those with malevolent intentions in a cunningly spun web of lies. These are embellished by $$ PR (public relations) rhetoric sometimes weakened by conflicting statements from leaders in the same camp (e.g. the BTN issue).

Recently, I came across one quotation by Ronald Reagan - "Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.”

Are you shocked that a former politician can make such a statement? Obviously, the world has seen an obvious pattern here as there exist many politicians who act and think that they have a carte blanche to say anything that gets them elected, while feeling no obligation to abide by their campaign promises. Worse still, they can do so with a smile on their faces with no guilt feelings whatsoever in their conscience assuming they have one in the first place!

Tragically, it’s unsurprising to see history repeating itself. Even though some characters may come and go, the underlying script remains intact.

Far too often, we see myths or spin tales that are not mere white lies. Experts, who have been paid MILLIONS by leaders using tax revenue, have the ability to overly distort facts skilfully to send carefully crafted messages to an unsuspecting electorate, especially those who do not have net access and lack education. For those who are working hard at the grass root level, they battle relentlessly to burst the bubble of the schemes, dreams and lies from the enemy who make empty promises. These are desperate attempts to misguide voters - a move that bears fruit as many lack net access may not be aware of the true state of affairs and may thus vote wrongly!

During any election, candidates must not be allowed to engage in demagoguery and propaganda. Oft repeated and over-killed tactics work against them and foster political apathy. They have to be intellectually challenged if they think we are THAT DUMB! What a gross insult!!

All over the world, we can see how some politicians lie because the public ALLOW themselves to be victims due to apathy or a numbed reaction. Why do some politicians get away with lying through their teeth???

1. Many voters could be disinterested in hearing the truth.

Realistically, some voters practise selective hearing. When two candidates are running and one tells the truth and the other panders to what the public wants to hear, the latter will win the election!! Why? The truth hurts. Rather than coping with the painful reality of their existence, some choose to believe in what they WANT to believe in even if they know deep in their hearts it is wrong! Does it mean that we have to lie to win an election? Food for thought!

For example, during the 1988 presidential election, the world was treated to the famous lie, "Reeeaaad my liiips, noooo neeew taaaxes" that Bush repeated to Americans. Of course Bush could declare that the public misunderstood him and he was merely saying "Know new Taxes" - a play on words that worked to his advantage!!

Bush lied because Dukakas had declared that tax increases had to be enforced to reverse the Reagan deficit. The public didn't want to hear that the Reagan debt was real and had to be paid back. They wanted to be lied to in order to ally their personal fears - so Bush told the public what they wanted to hear. Had he told the truth, he would have lost the election to someone who could lie better.

In 1992, the deficit was growing exponentially and Bush didn't have a plan to rectify things. By then, the electorate wanted a man with a plan on how to solve the problem. Clinton told the truth and because the public WANTED to hear the truth, he won! (I am using American examples for objectivity and to play safe!) Well, my question is, are our politicians ready to tell the truth when WE WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH?

We see a consistent ploy to evade the truth with frivolous (pun intended) responses, lame PR exercises that serve to tickle our ribs and make good after-dinner conversations. Isn't it pathetic that some do not realize that the rakyat are NOT that dumb as some court jesters claim???

2. Some voters may not want to hear the whole truth.

Consider the controversy of Clinton and pot-smoking. To admit to smoking pot is to admit that one knowingly and deliberately participated in law-breaking behavior. Would voters then want to elect a person who smoked pot? What kind of example does that set? The solution was a plain and simple one - to get elected, you're expected to lie law-breaking behavior! And did the electorate buy it? :-)

3. Are we being unreasonable to expect more moral perfection in our leaders?

In ancient civilizations, kings had absolute power and control over who lived and who died. Then, people didn't have books, television, and the Internet did not exist at all!!! It is a different world that we live in as so many factors have changed since then.

Our country is supposed to be one that practises democracy. Our "leaders" are public SERVANTS who work for us. They should use our money judiciously to keep law and order. They must remember their calling and responsibility. Or elected leaders wear no crown. Even if they wear a suit, are awarded titles and ride with motorcades, the fact still remains that WE PUT THEM THERE and they get paid to do a job for OUR COUNTRY.

4. We need to judge a politician on the basis of how good of a job he does doing what we elected him to do, and not based on which party he belongs to.

When our garden needs a gardener, we get one. When our country needs leaders, we elect them to lead wisely and prudently.

Ideally, politicians shouldn't lie and there are exceptions e.g. pertaining to national security issues and other confidential matters. BUT, when the voters elect politicians who lie over those who tell the truth then the voters shouldn't be surprised when these leaders get caught being less than truthful. Food for thought!!!

Let's face it. If we want politicians to tell the truth, voters must stop punishing those who speak with honesty and they must be brave enough to face the truth and the difficult decisions that leaders have to make when passing fair laws for the betterment of the nation.

The time has come for MSM and online sites to play fair. Each time a misdeed is reported, someone or some group etc will create alternative explanations and put the rakyat in a fix with such counter charges!!! Who are we to believe? Confusion rules and once again we are caught in a merry-go-round of lies and revelations and more lies and denials and more rebuttals - most tiring and frustrating indeed!

All I am asking for is for the MSM to create a coherent narrative about the truth that fits their moral conscience. They need to return to journalistic principles and be advocates for the truth, particularly, when the truth is discernable.

When a leader lies, the MSM must be allowed to do their job without painful consequences. Perhaps both sides distort the truth, but the media MUST NOT BE AFRAID to expose the side that, given the situation, distorts more. Instead, what we see is how many have shot the messenger who brought the message of truth! How sad! In such a climate of fear and assault, do you think whistle-blowers dare to even DREAM of doing their job? A very good example would be The path to truth is filled with officialdom by R. Nadeswaran which you can read at THIS LINK.

Sadly, many have been so nauseated with the sub-standard scripts being churned out almost daily till they expect leaders to be naturally dishonest. Straightforward attempts to say who is right and who is wrong go into one ear and out the other. As one trained in media and sociology, I find it saddening that public faith in institutions has deteriorated alarmingly.

The next time you read or watch anything from MSM, D. I. S. C. E. R. N. to free yourself from the politics of lies!

Please leave a comment if you wish. I would love to hear from you. Thanks and have a nice day!

CRAZY JOKES FOR MONDAY MORNING

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 21:30:00 +0000

It is Monday and some of you have to be at work after a relaxing weekend. Here's a selection of jokes to jumpstart your Monday and bring many smiles to your face. Many thanks to Angela for sending these to me. Have a great day and a fruitful week!

The next post on THE POLITICS OF LIES should be up by 2p.m. Please swing by again. My apologies for the delay.

___________________________________________________________________________
The Hi-Tech Man

Three men were sitting in the sauna naked.

Suddenly there was a beeping sound. Mr. A pressed his forearm and the beeping stopped. The others looked at him questioningly.

"That's my pager," he said, "I have a microchip under the skin of my arm."

A few minutes later a phone rang. Mr. B lifted his palm to his ear.

When he finished he explained, "That's my mobile phone. I have a microchip in my hand. "

Mr. C felt low-tech and inferior. He didn't know what to do to be as impressive as Mr. A and Mr. B.

He decided to take a break in the toilet. When he returned, he didn't realize that there was a piece of toilet paper got stuck and hanging from his backside.

The others raised their eyebrows and said, "Wow! What's that?"

Instead of being embarrassed, inspiration struck his mind.

*..*

*...*

*..*

*…*

*….*

*….*

*…..*

*…..*

*…….*

*…….*

Mr.C explained, "I'm receiving a FAX."

The other two fainted.!!!!

No insults intended to anyone. This is just to humor you.
___________________________

The old priest lay dying in the hospital....

For years He had faithfully served the people of the nation's capital. He motioned for his nurse to come near.

"Yes, Father?" said the nurse.

"I would really like to see K**** and S*** V*** before I die", whispered the priest.

"I'll see what I can do, Father" replied the nurse.

The nurse sent the request to them and waited for a response. Soon the word arrived. Khairy and Samy would be delighted to visit the priest.

As they went to the hospital, K**** commented to S*** "I don't know why the old priest wants to see us, but it will certainly help our images."

Samy couldn't help but agree.

When they arrived at the priest's room, the priest took S***'s hand in his right hand and K****'s hand in his left. There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priest's face.

Finally S*** spoke. "Father, of all the people you could have chosen, why did you choose us to be with you as you near the end?"

The old priest slowly replied "I have always tried to pattern my life after our Lord and Savior."

The old priest continued..."He died between two lying thieves. I would like to do the same."

___________________________________-

Divine Intervention

Father Norton wakes up to a beautiful and sunny Sunday morning and decides he just has to play golf. He pretends he’s sick and convinces the associate pastor to say Mass for him that day, then heads out of town to a golf course about 40 miles away so he won’t run into anyone from his parish. On the first tee, he sees that he has the entire course to himself—everyone else is in church!

Watching all this from the heavens, Saint Peter leans over to the Lord and asks, "Are you going to let him get away with this?"

Just then Father Norton hits the ball and it heads straight for the pin, dropping just short of it, rolls up and falls into the hole-a 420 yard hole in one!

Astonished, St. Peter looks at the Lord and asks, "Why in Heaven did you let him do that?"

The Lord smiles and replies, "Who’s he going to tell?"

________________________________________________

A guy and his wife are out golfing one day when they come up to the hardest hole on the course; it goes way downhill and you can’t quite see where your drive goes. So they tee off and walk down the hill and, lo and behold, this guy’s ball is right in front of a big barn.

The couple looks it over, and the wife says, “You know, if we open both barn doors, you will have a clear shot to the green.”

The guy agrees, and they open both of the doors. He hits his ball and it makes it through the first set of doors but hits the far wall and comes ricocheting back—hitting his wife in the head and killing her.

A few months pass and he is out golfing again with his buddies. They come up to the same hole and, wouldn’t you know it, the guy’s ball is right behind the barn again. One of his golf buddies says, “You know, if we open both barn doors you will have a clear shot to the green.”

The guy replies, “Nah, last time I tried that I got a 7.”

____________________________________

Have a nice day!

POLITICAL JOKES FOR SUNDAY AFTERNOON

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 05:59:00 +0000

Please enjoy this selection of political jokes which I collected over time. Some of them may seem eerily familiar to Malaysians :-). Do leave a comment if you wish. I would love to hear from you. Take care and have a nice day.
________________________________________________________________
How the Government Works

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert.
The MPs said,"Someone may steal from it at night." So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job.

Then one MP said,"How does the watchman do his job without instruction?" So they created a planning department and hired two people, one person to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies.

Then another MP said,"How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?" So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people. One to do the studies and one to write the reports.

Then other MPs said,"How are these people going to get paid?" So they created the following positions, a time keeper, and a payroll officer, then hired two people.

Then Prime Minister said,"Who will be accountable for all of these people?" So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal Secretary.

Then the Finance Minister said,"We have had this command in operation for one year and we are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost." So they laid off the night watchman.

__________________________________________________
Three Boys

Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers are.

The first one says:"Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow".

The second one says:"Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet".

The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says:"You two know nothing about fast. My father is a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45!!"

_____________________________________________________________

Political Brains

A Guy walks into a store. He sees three brains on display. One is a Libertarian Brain, priced at $250. The second is a Democrat Brain, priced at $275. The third is a Republican Brain, priced at $5,000,000.

The Guy asks the sales clerk,"Man, why does the Republican brain cost so much more than the other two?"

Clerk replies,"Well, sir, that brain has never been used.

_______________________________________________________________

A Story of Creation

In the beginning, God created heaven and earth.
Shortly thereafter God was in receipt of a notice to show cause why he shouldn't be cited for failure to file an environmental impact statement. He was granted a temporary planning permit for the project, but was stymied by a Cease and Desist Order for the earthly part.

At the hearing, God was asked why he began his earthly project in the first place. He replied that he just liked to be creative.

Then God said, "Let there be light."

Officials immediately demanded to know how the light would be made. Would it require strip mining? What about thermal pollution?

God explained that the light would come from a huge ball of fire, and provisional approval was granted with the proviso that no smoke would result.

The authorities demanded the issuance of a building permit, and (to conserve energy) required that the light be left off half the time. God agreed, saying he would call the light "Day" and the darkness "Night." Officials replied that they were only interested in protecting the environment, not in semantics.

God said, "Let the earth bring forth green herb and such as many seed."

The EPA agreed, so long as only native seed was used.

Then God said, "Let waters bring forth creeping creatures having life; and the fowl that may fly over the earth."

Officials pointed out this would require approval from the Department of Game coordinated with the Heavenly Wildlife Federation and the Audubongelic Society.

Everything went along smoothly until God declared that he intended to complete the project in six days.

Officials informed God it would take at least 200 days to review his many waiver applications and environmental impact statements. After that there would have to be a public hearing, and then there would be a 10-12 month probationary period before....

At this point, God created Hell.

DR. PHIL'S TEST - WHAT IS YOUR SCORE?

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 01:18:00 +0000

It is Sunday today and I thought I'd post something light and easy. This morning, when I checked my email, I found this delightful test that Angela sent. Try this test and let me know the score if you like in the comment box. :-) We need to answer these questions as honestly as we can. Take care and have a lovely Sunday!

____________________________________________________________

Dr. Phil's test...I'm a 40. And I can vouch that the results are 100% accurate!

Below is Dr. Phil's test.

(Dr. Phil scored 55, he did this test on Oprah and she got a 38.) Some folks pay a lot of
money to find this stuff out!

Read on, this is very interesting!

Don't be overly sensitive!

The following is pretty accurate and it only takes a few minutes.

Take this test for yourself and send it on to your friends.

Place your score in the subject box if you want to forward this test to your friends
and send it back to the person who sent it to you if he/she let you know his/her score.

Don't peek, but begin the test as you scroll down and answer.

Answers are for who you are now and not who you were in the past. Have pen or pencil
and paper ready.

This is a real test given by the Human Relations Dept. at many of the major corporations today. It helps them get better insight concerning their employees and in their prospective employees.

It's only 10 Simple questions, so grab a pencil and paper, keeping track of your letter answers to each question.

Make sure to change the subject of the email to read YOUR total.

When you are finished, forward this to friends, family, and also send it to the person who sent this to you.

Make sure to put 'YOUR' score in the subject box.

Ready?

Begin.

1.. When do you feel your best..

A) in the morning
B) during the afternoon and early evening
C ) late at night

2. You usually walk...

A) fairly fast, with long steps
B) fairly fast, with little steps
C) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
D) less fast, head down
E) very slowly

3. When talking to people you....

A) stand with your arms folded
B) have your hands clasped
C) have one or both your hands on your hips
D) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
E) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair

4. When relaxing, you sit with...

A) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
B) your legs crossed
C) your legs stretched out or straight
D) one leg curled under you

5. When something really amuses you, you react with...

A) big appreciated laugh
B) a laugh, but not a loud one
C) a quiet chuckle
D) a sheepish smile

6. When you go to a party or social gathering you...

A) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
B) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
C) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed

7. You're working very hard, concentrating hard, and you're interrupted...

A) welcome the break
B) feel extremely irritated
C) vary between these two extremes

8. Which of the following colors do you like most...

A) Red or orange
B) black
C) yellow or light blue
D) green
E) dark blue or purple
F) white
G) brown or gray

9. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are....

A) stretched out on your back
B) stretched out face down on your stomach
C) on your side, slightly curled
D) with your head on one arm
E) with your head under the covers

10. You often dream that you are...

A) falling
B) fighting or struggling
C) searching for something or somebody
D) flying or floating
E) you usually have dreamless sleep
F) your dreams are always pleasant

POINTS:

1. (a) 2 (b) 4 (c) 6
2. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 7 (d) 2 (e) 1
3. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d) 7 (e) 6
4. (a) 4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d) 1
5. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 2
6. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 2
7. (a) 6 (b) 2 (c) 4
8. (a) 6 (b) 7 (c) 5 (d) 4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g) 1
9. (a) 7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d) 2 (e ) 1
10 (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 6 (f) 1

Now add up the total number of points.

OVER 60 POINT: Others see you as someone they should 'handle with care'. You're seen as vain, self-centered, and who is extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don't always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.

51 TO 60 POINTS: Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality, a natural leader, who's quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once, someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.

41 TO 50 POINTS: Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting, someone who's constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding, someone who'll always cheer them up and help them out.

31 TO 40 POINTS: Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & ; practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expects the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you, realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.

21 TO 30 POINTS: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively
or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. They think t his reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.

UNDER 21 POINTS: People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions and who doesn't want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don't exist. Some people think you're boring. Only those who know you well, know that you aren't.

Now forward this to others, and put your score in the subject box of your e-mail, like this: Dr. Phil's test...I'm a 45. Have a nice day!

NATURALLY NIZAR

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 04:35:00 +0000

Confidently, he walked into the hall at his own pace without the rhythmic beat of kompangs that befits the status and stature of the Menteri Besar of Perak. No ordinary man, he exuded a calmness and demeanor of a godly person who knew and accepted his place on earth in the greater scheme of things as determined by the Almighty. A sudden hush filled the hall when he walked down the aisle with his aides. And as he neared the stage, the crowd clapped as they rose in awe and respect of this great man, YB Dato' Nizar Jamaluddin (Menteri Besar Perak,) who spoke on "Perak Crisis: The lessons for Two-Party System in Malaysia" at Kompleks Penyayang last night.

In the welcoming address, Penang Deputy Chief Minister I Dr.Mansor Othman emphasized that Pakatan Rakyat wants to establish a system of government based on needs, not race. YB Sim Tze Tzin then gave a brief rundown of the tragic Perak Constitutional Crisis before YB Dato' Nizar Jamaluddin began his speech.

With a deep and authoritative voice, Dato' Nizar recited a Quranic verse followed by translations in Bahasa Malaysia and English, purposeful reminders to all that we are the Almighty's creation and we should not emphasize differences but instead, remember our roots:

O mankind! Be careful of your duty to your Lord Who created you from a single soul and from it created its mate and from them has spread a multitude of men and women.

*taken from THIS LINK

I was awestruck by the charisma and powerful presentation skills of Dato' Nizar. Fluent in Arabic, English, Mandarin and even a smattering of Tamil words, he certainly bedazzled the audience with his powerful oratory skills. With much mastery, he displayed the correct intonation, nuances and lilts in vocal quality required for each language in his deep baritone voice. Splendid! The only other leader I can think of who has such abilities is Dato' Seri Anwar Ibrahim.

Dato' Nizar defused some tension that filled the air by thanking 'the police from the nearest police station' for ensuring the security of the event by their presence. Laughter filled the air and soon everyone was at ease. After setting the mood for the evening, the Menteri Besar shared the lessons learnt from the Perak Constitutional Crisis.

He started with a historical perspective of our political scenario by reminding us of how for 52 years, Malaysians have been living in a climate of fear because the three component parties of the ruling party played on ethnic differences in the way they reminded members and Malaysians that they had to maintain status quo to prevent social upheaval, messages sent out with the support of media which echoed such racial overtones leaving many suppressed and oppressed. In many ways, Perak is a microcosm of Malaysia. Interestingly, many leaders actually come from Perak!

Next, Dato' Nizar opened a window for us to take a peek at what actually happened after it was announced that they had won the right to rule in Perak. His riveting account left many with eyes wide open and mouths agape as he recounted in great detail, the sequence of events that followed with so much sincerity, openness in a no holds barred approach. Awesome!

Layer by layer, Dato' Nizar peeled the circumstances of that historical event to reveal the true heart of Pakatan Rakyat. The lesson learnt was a plain and simple one - The PR leaders put aside all differences to work together for the well-being of Perakians and are sincere in their effort and dream to achieve a two-party system.

* The PR leaders who assembled to deliberate on the next step to take after victory decided to abide by the Perak Constitution and unanimously agreed to give the position of MB to PAS.

* PAS leaders met to decide which of the PAS elected leaders would be the MB. The five winners, including Dato' Nizar, declined the position of MB. YB had the crowd in stitches when he said that there they were - each with the golden opportunity to become the Menteri Besar of Perak and NO ONE wanted to accept the position whereas in another party, one would pay millions for a meagre position in a division!!! His revelation of the reasons why each candidate declined was such a riot that I could not believe the resounding laughter that came from the crowd. It is really so funny that I dare not post the rationale given by each candidate so candidly. :-)

* Finally, the PAS heads decided who would be the leader - Dato' Nizar.

From this point, Dato' Nizar gave a very detailed explanation of the events that transpired and the plot to topple the PR government. He revealed two names that were primarily responsible and reiterated that these two would go down in history. He also gave an explanation of the Constitutional Crisis and what transpired in the Istana.

After that, Dato' Nizar shared some statistics that impressed us deeply:

* The Auditor-General's Report gave the PR govt a score of 4 (excellent) which is much higher than the general acceptance level. In 52 years of BN rule, the maximum that the BN government of Perak ever collected was RM530 million and zakat collection was RM 40 million.

Contrastingly, in 10.5 months, despite the spanners thrown in the works, the PR government in Perak succeeded in collecting RM633 million and zakat collection was RM 58 million.

* As for the V6 issue, Dato' Nizar explained that the reports against PR failed to mention that the figure was cumulative expenditure for four years.

* He emphasized that all steps taken by PR in Perak was to show respect to the decision of the rakyat to vote them into power. The PR government believes in upholding five principles in governance namely:

* justice
* trustworthiness
* transparency
* integrity
* welfare

He also shared the stark differences in the amount of investments brought into the state by BN compared to PR.(I cannot cite the exact amount as I cannot decipher my handwriting in my notes!!!) YB also shocked us with the revelation that the Perak budget was passed by the BN state government in 20 minutes!!!

With much vehemence, Dato' Nizar emphasized that any racist tendencies will be sand mined by PR government and he lamented how "racist tendencies are deeply ingrained in the hearts" of many due to the ploys of certain parties and reiterated that PR will work together to bury UMNO.

The Q & A session was very vibrant and saw questions being asked by guys from different age groups and races. YB Dato' Nizar tackled each question sincerely, earnestly and in great detail too! In response to one question from an ex-commando, YB urged each and every one of us to raise our prayers and supplications to God that truth and justice be restored in this land and emphasized the need for unity, cohesiveness and togetherness in our mission to build a better Malaysia. With much vehemence and conviction, YB reiterated that PAS is NOT RACIST and will reject all any racist sentiments. He did not mince his words when he identified racist parties/leaders who had dented the psyche of Malaysians to the extent that we have so much emotional baggage to carry in our journey to build the nation.

The hall was full last night and I was certainly pleased that this time, many youths were there. PAS supporters gave a resounding roar and 'yell' of support after YB ended the forum with a very meaningful Quranic verse. The audience clapped furiously as we gave him a standing ovation.

As I walked out of the hall, I was overcome with much emotion after coming face to face with YB Dato' Nizar - truly a great Malaysian leader with so much in his heart, so much to give to our nation. He had spoken very sincerely and elegantly and what we saw of him last night without any airs was his natural self, no holds barred with no masks on his face. Here is 1Malaysian Leader - all real,untainted.

Will you walk with him and other leaders to build a better Malaysia for us all?

1Rakyat for Malaysia!

--------------------------------------

This forum was organized by Biro Komunikasi, Parti KeADILan Pulau Pinang under the leadership of YB Sim Tze Tzin, Penang State Assemblyman for Pantai Jerejak.

SIXTY-FOUR THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT THE BENEFITS OF VINEGAR

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 21:30:00 +0000

My dear friend Angela sent me this post via e-mail about the sixty-four uses for the all-purpose household wonder - VINEGAR! Do read it and leave a comment if you wish. Thanks. Have a great day!

*My review of last night's forum will be up soon. Am writing it now :-). My apologies for this delay. I had to take an antihistamine last night and could not stay up to write the review. Please swing by again. Sorry for the inconvenience caused. Thanks.

___________________________________________________________________

1. Kill grass on walks and driveways. Pour full strength on unwanted grass.

2. Kill weeds. Spray full strength on tops of weeds. Reapply on any new growth until plants have starved.

3. Increase soil acidity. In hard water areas, add a cup of vinegar to a gallon of tap water for watering acid loving plants like rhododendrums,gardenias, or azaleas. The vinegar will release iron in the soil for the plants to use.

4. Neutralize garden lime. Rinse your hands liberally with vinegar after working with garden lime to avoid rough and flaking skin. Clean pots before repotting, rinse with vinegar to remove excess lime.

5. Deter ants. Spray vinegar around door and window frames, under appliances, and along other known ant trails.

6. Keep car windows frost free. Coat the windows the night before with a solution of three parts vinegar to one part water.

7. Polish car chrome. Apply full strength with a soft cloth.

8. Soak new propane latern wicks in vinegar for several hours. Let dry before using. Will burn longer and brighter.

9. Clean milking equipment. Rinse with vinegar to leave system clean,
odorless, and bacteria free without harmful chemical residue.

10. Remove skunk odor from a dog. Rub fur with vinegar.

11. Keep cats away. Sprinkle vinegar on an area to discourage cats from walking, sleeping,or scratching on it.

12. Keep dogs from scratching ears. Clean the inside of the ears with a soft cloth dipped in diluted vinegar.

13. Keep away fleas and mange. Add a little vinegar to your pet's drinking water.

14. Keep chickens from pecking each other. Add cider vinegar to their drinking water.

15. Make buttermilk. Add a tablespoon of vinegar to a cup of milk and let it stand 5 minutes to thicken.

16. Tenderize meat. Soak in vinegar overnight.

17. Freshen vegetables. Soak wilted vegetables in a quart of cold water and a tablespoon of vinegar.

18. Replace a lemon. Substitute 1/4 teaspoon of vinegar for 1 teaspoon of lemon juice.

19. Firm up gelatin. Add a teaspoon of vinegar for every box of gelatin used to keep those molded desserts from sagging in the summer
heat.

20. Boil better eggs. Add 2 tablespoons of vinegar to each quart of water before boiling eggs, keeps them from cracking.

21. Prepare fluffier rice. Add a teaspoon of vinegar to the water when it boils.

22. Make wine vinegar. Mix 2 tablespoons of vinegar with 1 teaspoon of dry red wine.

23. Debug fresh vegetables. Wash leafy greens in water with vinegar and salt. Bugs float off.

24. Scale fish more easily. Rub with vinegar 5 minutes before scaling.

25. Dampen your appetite. Sprinkle a little vinegar on prepared food to take the edge off your appetite.

26. Soothe a bee or jellyfish sting. Douse with vinegar. Will soothe irritation and relieve itching.

27. Relieve sunburn. Lightly rub white or cider vinegar on skin. Reapply as needed.

28. Conditions hair. Add a tablespoon of vinegar to your rinse to dissolve sticky residue left by shampoo.

29. Relieve dry and itchy skin. Add 2 tablespoons of vinegar to your bath water.

30. Fight dandruff. After shampooing, rinse with a solution of 1/2 cup vinegar and 2 cups of warm water.

31. Soothe a soar throat. Put a teaspoon of vinegar in a glass of water. Gargle, then swallow. For another great gargle: 1 c. hot water, 2 tbsp. honey, 1 tbsp. vinegar, gargle then drink.

32. Clear up warts. Apply a lotion of half cider vinegar and half glycerin.

33. Treat sinus infections and chest colds. Add 1/4 cup or more vinegar to the vaporizer.

34. Feel good. A teaspoon of apple cider vinegar in a glass of water, with a bit of honey added for flavor, will take the edge off your appetite and give you an overall healthy feeling.

35. Deodorize the kitchen drain. Pour a cup down the drain once a week. Let stand 30 minutes and then flush with cold water.

36. Eliminate onion odor. Rub on your fingers before and after slicing.

37. Clean and disinfect wood cutting boards. Wipe with full strength vinegar.

38. Remove fruit stains from hands. Rub with vinegar.

39. Cut grease and odor on dishes. Add a tablespoon of vinegar to hot soapy water.

40. Clean a teapot. Boil a mixture of water and vinegar in the teapot. Wipe away the grime.

41. Freshen a lunchbox. Soak a piece of bread in vinegar and let it sit in the unchbox over night.

42. Clean the refrigerator. Wash with a solution of equal parts water and vinegar.

43. Unclog a drain. Pour a handful of baking soda down the drain and add 1/2 cup of vinegar. Rinse with hot water.

44. Clean and deodorize the garbage disposal. Make vinegar ice cubes and feed them down the disposal. After grinding, run cold water through a minute.

45. Clean and deodorize jars. Rinse mayonnaise, peanut butter, and mustard jars with vinegar when empty.

46. Clean the dishwasher. Run a cup of vinegar through the whole cycle once a month to reduce soap build up on the inner mechanisms and on glassware.

47. Clean stainless steel. Wipe with a vinegar dampened cloth.

48. Clean china and fine glassware. Add acup of vinegar to a sink of warm water. Gently dip the glass or china in the solution and let dry.

49. Get stains out of pots. Fill pot with a solution of 3 tablespoons of vinegar to a pint of water. Boil until stain loosens and can be washed away.

50. Clean the microwave. Boil a solution of 1/4 cup of vinegar and 1 cup of water in the microwave. Will loosen splattered on food and deodorize.

51. Dissolve rust from bolts and other metals. Soak in full strength vinegar.

52. Get rid of cooking smells. Let simmer a small pot of vinegar and water solution.

53. Unclog steam iron. Pour equal amounts of vinegar and water into the iron's water chamber. Turn to steam and leave the iron on for 5 minutes in an upright postion. Then uplug and allow to cool. Any loose particles should come out when you empty the water.

54. Clean a scorched iron plate. Heat equal parts vinegar and salt in a small pan. Rub solution on the cooled iron surface to remove dark or burned stains.

55. Get rid of lint in clothes. Add 1/2 cup of vinegar to the rinse cycle.

56. Keep colors from running. Immerse clothes in full strength vinegar before washing.

57. Freshen up the washing machine. Periodically, pour a cup of vinegar in the machine and let in run through a regular cycle (no clothes added). Will dissolve soap residue.

58. Brighten fabric colors. Add a 1/2 cup vinegar to the rinse cycle.

59. Take grease off suede. Dip a toothbrush in vinegar and gently brush over grease spot.

60. Remove tough stains. Gently rub on fruit, jam, mustard, coffee, tea. Then wash as usual.

61. Get smoke smell out of clothes. Add a cup of vinegar to a bath tub of hot water. Hang clothes above the steam.

62. Remove decals. Brush with a couple coats of vinegar. Allow to soak in. Wash off.

63. Clean eyeglasses. Wipe each lens with a drop of vinegar.

64. Freshen cut flowers. Add 2 tablespoons vinegar and 1 teaspoon sugar for each quart of water.

"No trees were killed in the making of this blog post... however, a large number of electrons were horribly inconvenienced."

LESSONS FROM MANDELA

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 09:45:00 +0000

I find Nelson Mandela a most inspiring world leader.His book "A Long Walk To Freedom is easily my favorite autobiography. Recently, I came across an article by Richard Stengel in TIME magazine on Mandela : His 8 Lessons of Leadership which is an excellent read. As such, I thought I'd blog something along those lines for this evening before going for YB Dato' Nizar's Forum at Kompleks Penyayang later @ 8.30p.m.

The biography of Mandela is available at THIS LINK.

According to Wikipedia:

Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela( born 18 July 1918) is a former President of South Africa, the first to be elected in a fully representative democratic election, who held office from 1994–99. Before his presidency, Mandela was an anti-apartheid activist, and the leader of the African National Congress's armed wing Umkhonto we Sizwe. The South African courts convicted him on charges of sabotage, as well as other crimes committed while he led the movement against apartheid. In accordance with his conviction, Mandela served 27 years in prison, spending many of these years on Robben Island. Following his release from prison on 11 February 1990, Mandela supported reconciliation and negotiation, and helped lead the transition towards multi-racial democracy in South Africa.

Since the end of apartheid, many have frequently praised Mandela, including former opponents. In South Africa he is often known as Madiba, an honorary title adopted by elders of Mandela's clan. The title has come to be synonymous with Nelson Mandela.

Mandela is currently a celebrated elder statesman who continues to voice his opinion on topical issues. He has received more than 250 awards over four decades, most notably the 1993 Nobel Peace Prize. In November 2009, the United Nations General Assembly announced that Mandela's birthday, 18 July, is to be known as 'Mandela Day' marking his contribution to world freedom. Read more at THIS LINK.

The eight lessons of leadership as expounded by Richard Stengel are in bold followed by my thoughts.

1. Courage is not the absence of fear, it is inspiring others to move beyond their fears.

Most of us are scared of the unknown which can be scary. Mandela was imprisoned for 27 years and it must have been most difficult for him. In fact, Mandela said, "I can't pretend that I'm brave and that I can beat the whole world, but as a leader, you cannot let people know." I think what Mandela hopes to teach is that even though there are many times when we are scared beyond belief, we need to show confidence and optimism to others lest they become as scared as us. I don't think he means for us to suppress our emotions but rather, to remember that our behavior and lives can affect those around us.

2. Lead from the front, but don't leave your base behind.

When in leadership positions, there are times when others may expect us to lead but we cannot be too innovative or progressive until we get too far ahead of our base supporters that they are left behind. When working together, in due time, things will get better. What is important is that we convince them to work with us. This can be frustrating at times so we will have to develop patience, tolerance and fortitude.

3. Lead from the back and let others believe they are in front.

Mandela, when he was in power, would always listen when others gave their views in discussions and debates before he made his contribution. He said that a "chief's job was not to tell people what to do but to form a consensus. Don't enter the debate too early." From my observation, there are leaders who love to talk but hate to listen to their subordinates. What a tragedy! Proper strategy can ensure greater success in the scheme of things.

4. Know your enemy and learn about his favorite sport.

A great leader is one who can unify friends and understand enemies. Mandela used this strategy to understand and speak his opponent's language to understand their strengths and weaknesses and to formulate strategies and tactics to win. It is better to make a friend than to keep an enemy.

5. Keep your friends close and your rivals even closer.

Some people show their displeasure with their rivals on their faces but Mandela teaches us to charm our rivals and make sure they are in our circle of influence. According to the Time article, Mandela believed that he could control his rivals by embracing them, as they were more dangerous outside his circle of influence. Mandela valued loyalty but was never obsessed by it; he understood that people acted on their own self-interests.

6. Appearance matters and remember to smile.

Mandela was usually very well dressed and careful about how he looked, acted, and dressed. He was sure to wear the proper fatigues with a beard when he was photographed. Despite the trials and tribulations that he always had a smile on his face. I think this is a precious lesson to learn because so often, we can allow our troubles to weigh us down.

7. Nothing is black or white.

In any political situation, we can see that a great leader faces uncertainly and contradictions. Mandela believed that life is never either/or. Leaders have to make complex decisions by considering competing factors. Life is not that simple and explanations may not be found or given that easily because in reality, things are never as straightforward as they seem.

8. Quitting is a way of leading too.

Real leadership is the ability to know when it is time to step down and let others lead. Before that happens, a great leader always trains others to take over for him/her. The sign of greatness can be seen when a leader knows when and how to abandon a failed idea, task, or relationship. In the history of Africa, only a few leaders knew when it was time to step down. Nelson Mandela was one of these leaders.

I believe that all of us, especially the leaders of our country can learn from these eight great pointers shared so simply and yet profoundly by Mandela. He is certainly the stuff that great men are made of.

Have a lovely evening and swing by later for my review of the forum. Please leave a comment if you wish. Thanks.

YOU CANNOT AFFORD TO MISS THIS!!

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 17:55:00 +0000

Are you going to be in Penang tonight? Are you free and wondering what to do on a Friday night? Think no more. I have the perfect solution for you - and the best part is it is FREE OF CHARGE. All you need to do is to drive to Kompleks Penyayang at Jalan Utama, Pulau Pinang and be seated before 8.30p.m.. You will be enlightened by certain precious gems that will be shared tonight.

Nope. I am not talking about any religious event. Neither am I talking about a sales presentation or some crummy poorly rehearsed concert. So what on earth is this all about?

As Malaysians, we must realize that the Perak crisis is a bitter pill to swallow for Pakatan Rakyat if they intend to cherish and further ambition to march to Putrajaya. Since the crisis happened, did you ever think about the lessons that can be drawn from the Perak Constitutional Crisis?

For the first time in Penang, you can have the opportunity to listen first hand to a leader who painstakingly went through the challenges of that crisis and he is none other than YB Dato' Nizar Jamaluddin (Menteri Besar Perak)who will be speaking on "Perak Crisis: The lessons for Two-Party System in Malaysia".

This forum is organized by Biro Komunikasi, Parti KeADILan Pulau Pinang under the leadership of YB Sim Tze Tzin, Penang State Assemblyman for Pantai Jerejak. It will be conducted in English and Bahasa Malaysia. Mark it in your organizer and come tonight! See you there, folks!

NO BUT'S FOR BUTTS

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 09:18:00 +0000

Would you show your butt to someone who is not your spouse or doctor? I am sure that question would have elicited a vehement 'NO" from you. I read with raised eyebrows and much horror in my heart the Malaysiakini report HERE on the alleged butt-showing incident which resulted in a walkout staged by BN state assemblymen after Penang's opposition leader Azhar Ibrahim, from Umno, was suspended from the state assembly this morning.

Malaysiakini reported:

The drama today started when Sim informed speaker Abdul Halim Hussain that Azhar showed his butt to him when he was ejected from the House by deputy speaker Tan Hock Leong for using unparliamentary words yesterday.

However, Azhar denied showing his butt to Sim. He argued that he was bending down to pick up his bag before leaving the hall.

The speaker then told Azhar that he had viewed the video footage of the incident in private and was convinced that there was an element of truth in Sim's allegation.

Speaker Abdul Halim then told Azhar that he had viewed the video footage of the incident in private and was convinced that there was an element of truth in Sim's allegation.

He also offered Azhar to view the footage with him in private to verify the incident. However Azhar declined the offer and said he will not apologise for the incident.

Abdul Halim then told Azhar to leave the hall and announced that the opposition leader was suspended for the rest of the current session.

Now if he really did not show that part of his anatomy, why then the reluctance to view the footage with the Speaker in private????

I applaud the Speaker's elegant and sensitive way of handling this delicate situation and for opening avenues for Azhar Ibrahim to clear the air.

But he declined this offer and worse still, refused to apologise for the incident.

If one is innocent, it is understandable that one would NOT apologize for something that one did not do. However, in the face of allegations, would it not be best to clear the air by looking at the evidence to justify one's innocence?

I have not seen the video and have no wish to see the video!!!

I am NOT a PKR member but I know YB Sim Tze Tzin. To me, he is a fine example of a promising, dynamic and passionate assemblyman who truly cares for the rakyat and goes to the grassroot level to help those in need. He certainly strikes me as a man of mettle who would not mince his words or distort situations to his own advantage.

I do not know BN assemblyman Azhar Ibrahim personally but I certainly hope that this situation can be resolved amicably and as speedily as possible. I would appeal to him to view the footage with the Speaker to clarify the situation and to make amends with YB Sim if the evidence necessitates such a move.

For me, there are no 'but's' if the evidence demands a verdict. Elected representatives must give nothing but their best to serve the rakyat who put them there in the first place. There is no time to waste over petty issues such as this one and no one, regardless of age, status, gender, color or creed should partake in such acts!

--------------------------------------------

Please leave a comment if you wish. I would love to hear your views. Thanks and have a lovely evening, dear reader.

WAS IT REALLY POLITICALLY MOTIVATED?

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 02:20:00 +0000

When RM2.3billion is to be used to purchase 'the scandal tainted' Eurocopter Cougar EC725 helicopters supposedly the best choice to replace the ageing Nuri, are we expected to be glad that such a huge sum of tax revenue is to be used for allegedly 40-year old aircraft redeveloped and refitted and given a new name? Click HERE to read more.

I blogged about this last year in my post WHAT NOW MY LOVE? BLIMEY! HELICOPTERS OF COURSE! Malaysiakini has a post HERE on that topic.

According to Free Malaysia Today:

* "Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak said today the choppers are the best choice to replace the ageing Nuri."

* He said the Public Accounts Committee (PAC) had cleared the inquiry process on the proposed purchase of the Eurocopter Cougars. (Google eurocopters and you can find lots of sites debating this

* “There’s no doubt that the Defence Ministry and the Royal Malaysian Air Force want that particular aircraft and the government is satisfied,” Najib said.

* “The integrity of the whole process cannot be questioned. So it is now a question of affordability.”

*In defending the Eurocopter deal yesterday, Najib said: “We will have to work out the financing capability and affordability. It is a very high performance helicopter.

“It is the best performing helicopter of its class; so let’s not get involved in this (argument on the choice). Whatever happened in the past, it was all politically motivated.”

With due respect, I would like to pose the following questions:

1. In what ways are the choppers the "BEST CHOICE" to replace the ageing Nuri?

Could someone in the Ministry allay the fears of the public about the dollars and cents of this decision and also safety issues?

What about other options such as the Sikorsky S92 or the Bell 214ST?These options make more sense as they are cheaper both to buy and to maintain and have a good track record in terms of reliability.In fact, an older version of the 214ST was used in the Vietnam War.

Is our Malaysia government buying the BEST aircraft in terms of value for money? From whom are they making this purchase? Was there a feasibility study conducted to compare prices and functionality of these copters? Or is it merely wastage of public funds that can weaken our country economically and morally?

2. In the first place, why was there an issue with the proposed purchase that necessitated the PAC to conduct an issue? Such a development does not augur well for anyone's credibility. Read this LINK and THIS SITE and a report at THE SUN (11th Nov 2008).

3. Can someone tell me how the government can be satisfied with the WANTS of particular people who WANT a particular aircraft?

According this site, a "want" is defined as having a strong desire for something. The word " need " is defined as lack of the means of subsistence. In every arena of life, the two concepts are opposing elements (Merriam-Webster Online).

As a citizen, I wonder why the WANTS of some people can cost RM2.3billion when the NEEDS of many other citizens in terms of public goods and services are HAVE NOT BEEN MET for many decades? Just look at how many in East Malaysia and the east coast of the peninsular still do not have access to electricity, piped water etc? I need not elaborate further.

4. Perhaps our leaders can explain how the ministry concerned will work out the financing capability and affordability of this purchase, in the light of recent reports that RM28billion have been lost indiscriminately as reported HERE.

Besides, our PM also recently remarked that "It is morally wrong to ask for bonus as the country is still struggling to sail out of the economic downturn" as reported by the Sun.

5. Finally, why did the PM say that whatever happened in the past was politically motivated?

What threat is there when people question how tax revenue is being used, especially when we have seen in recent years how so much money is going up in smoke?

I sincerely hope that our resources will be used prudently for the benefit of all and not that of a few. How do you feel about this, dear reader?

Do leave a comment if you so wish. Thanks and have a nice day.

________________________________

My apologies for posting fewer socio-political posts for the past few days. I am currently writing on three topics at the same time and it has been quite taxing to read so much and to cope with social engagements. The next post will be up later in the afternoon. Thanks for your patience with me. Have a nice day.

A point of clarification - My post on WHAT NOW MY LOVE? BLIMEY! HELICOPTERS OF COURSE was deleted last year in this blog when I deleted my entire blog in January this year. Newer readers may not be aware of this. What you see here would be posts from January till the present. All deleted posts are available in another locked site. If you wish to read it, please leave your email address and I will send it to you. Sorry for the inconvenience caused. Thanks.

THIS AND THAT FROM HERE AND THERE

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 21:30:00 +0000

A mother passing by her son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, she saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed to 'Mum'. With the worst premonition, she opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands.

Dear, Mum.

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings and tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am.

But it's not only the passion, Mum. She's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!!

Don't worry Mum, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren.

Love, your son, John.

“P.S. Mum, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on my desk”

I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.

___________________________

To Be 6 Again...
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife, looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday.

'I'd like to be six again', she replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park. What a day!

He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything there was.

Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.

He then took her to a McDonald 's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate
Shake.

Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!
Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.

He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear, what was it like being six again?'

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.
'I meant my dress size, you idiot!!!!'

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna get it wrong..

SEND THIS TO ALL THE
WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH
And all The Men that need……! .whatever..!!!

___________________________

2 tough questions

Question 1:

If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?

Read the next question before looking at the response for this one.

Question 2:

It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts.
Here are the facts about the three candidates. Who would you vote for?

Candidate A.
Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologist
He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.

Candidate B.
He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C
He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be our choice? Decide first... no peeking, then scroll down for the response.

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Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question:
If you said YES, you just killed Beethoven (the great German composer of instrumental music ).

Pretty interesting isn't it? Makes a person think before judging someone.

A TALL TALE TO TELL - political satire

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 03:50:00 +0000

While flying to the City YYY for a forthcoming by-election, a Super Country's Most Important Minister airplane is tragically hit by lightning and the passengers die. They soul arrive in heaven and are met at the judgement entrance.

“Welcome to heaven,” says an Angel. “Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see four Super high Political official around these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you.”

“No problem, just let me in,” says the man. “Well, I’d like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we’ll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Just like what the Head of government would allow the citizens to hear a one-day campaign speech from the ruling regime & a speech from the Opposition to decide. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.”

“Really, I have made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,” says the 4 Super VIPs.

“I’m sorry, but we have our rules,” says the Angel.

And with that, the Angel escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other titled politicians who had worked with him in the regime.

Everyone is very happy and dressed in the finest Billion $$$ branded clothes and gems. They run to greet him on red carpet and with full trumpet fanfare,shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had playing with bribes while getting rich at the expense of the people.

They play a friendly game of golf and then indulge themselves on lobsters, extra large crabs and the most expensive feast there is in their many palaces. Even with sexy girls provided like what we had used in recent by-elections.

Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell, wish them to come back again and waves while the elevator rises.

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where the Angel is waiting for him.

“Now it’ s time to visit heaven.”

So, 24 hours pass with the VIPs joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing living modestly like some sages of old. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and the Angel returns.

“Well, then, you’ve spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.”

The VIP reflects for a minute, then he answers,“ I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think WE are better off in hell.”

So the Angel escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he’s in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage.

He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.

The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.

“I don’t understand,” stammers the VIP. “Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster at a feast, drank a tasty fruit juices, and danced and had a great time. Now there’s just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?”

The devil looks at him, smiles and says, “Yesterday we were campaigning just like you during an election…… Today you voted.”

-Author Unknown-

_________________________________________________________________

*I modified this tale which was sent to me by a friend....

MORAL OF THIS TALE: VOTE WISELY IN THE NEXT ELECTION! Do not be ensnared by empty promises and cosmetic trappings put up just for show and then to pay for the wrong decision in the years that follow.

WHY? PLEASE TELL ME WHY...

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 21:30:00 +0000

Why .....do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Why .....do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke?

Why ...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Why ......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Why .....do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Why . .....do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

EVER WONDER ...

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin ?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Why? Good question.

POLITICAL CONSCIOUSNESS - MALAYSIANS Vs SINGAPOREANS Part 1

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 09:16:00 +0000

Malaysia and Singapore have more in common than surface issues. Whilst many may feel that Singapore is far more advanced than its Malaysian neighbour, the fact remains that both nations face the underlying threat posed by some citizens who are not too happy with the current government. The difference is in the way and avenue by which this dissent is expressed and the psyche of the unhappy lot.

It is only after the Head and Shoulders Above Us All post that I realized that anti-LKY sentiments are stronger than anti-TDM/BN feelings and that too because Singaporeans have a greater ability to think as they have higher standards of education than Malaysia and have been able to harness their human resources to their advantage while Malaysians are generally divided thanks to certain divisive policies designed in the name of development. Also, their quality of leaders is much better because of that not forgetting a lower rate of corruption and many other factors.

Following that, I asked Mr. P from Singapore to share with me his thoughts on this and to perhaps offer some explanations as to why Singaporeans seem to be more vocal about their discontent despite being more developed in many areas than Malaysia and in spite of the 'kiasi' attitude that many seem to display.

He offered the following explanation in his response via e-mail and has allowed me to republish it in this post:

"Singaporeans" where do I start? Let's start with my generation,the current and the in-between. I dare say that my generation, "the baby boomers", were the ones that built the corner stone for modern Singapore. We did what the govt. or LKY pushed down our throats without questions accepting that being English educated was an advantage in civil service and commercial firms. The Chinese stream especially those from Nantah or Nanyang university were "marginalised" in the commercial/civil service owing to their poor command of English but excelled in the boom business of construction/infrastructure/trading.

When Nanyang or Nantah was amalgamated with Singapore Uni as NUS with English as first language and mandarin the mother tongue 2nd language for all Chinese,a new generation evolved with the better English educated no longer having the upper hand against the bilingual offshoots of the Nantah generation. NUS produced these children of successful Chinese educated businessmen in the construction/infrastructure and white collar English educated civil service/commercial/financial companies.

The Chinese educated never forgot their marginalization even though more successful than others. The English educated remember their bitter pills and this becomes the core subject of their children who are enjoying the best education system where lecturers from western countries are brought in to give them a totally different approach to education.

Being smart and analytical in their thoughts, they will question and debate/argue everything the government throws at them unlike our generation who are more submissive. These are the in-between generation that includes my daughter.

The current generation are so cosmopolitan and so IT savvy it really frightens me. These are the ones commenting in the nets with their articulate command of English and the Opposition political parties are courting them. Even with the best brains in their fold i.e.PAP/Govt. a freak election may happen. Most of the young are happy with the status quo they are protesting because they felt stifled as compared with the western culture where children are given more rein to speak and decide for themselves.

I am not saying that the PAP is indispensable nor the oppositions are lacking. Singapore just happens to be UNIQUE, with no resources, they have to live by their WITs and in this area LKY is truly Head & Shoulders above the rest and he hopes to inculcate this to the new leaders before he passes on.

The two subjects which were, are and never will be resolved regarding PAP & their governing styles are i) ISD internal security act ii) the monstrous salary of Cabinet & top civil servants. Not forgetting the 15% Malays, most are PAP supporters and they thrived in the civil service and govt.back or owned companies.

Let me tell it in my simple way which again, all HELL will break loose if posted in the net. ISD- was and is still used against oppositions or anyone using RACE,RELIGION and issues that DESTABILISES the country,the last being the most difficult to pin and the opposition or people with agendas knowing that exploit it to the fullest.

Why weren't David Marshall, founder and leader of Workers Party, Dr. Lee Siew Choh leader of the breakaway Barisan Sosialis and JB Jeyeretnam the most well known leader of the opposition until his demise ever locked up??

They may get personal in their vociferous ways but they never crossed the line and are not communists or sympathizers. As for Dr. Chee Soon Juan who is getting support from those with agendas but not daring to expose themselves for fear of ISD is using him to voice their issues and like the novice he is in politics fell for it.That's why he is repeatedly trounced in election by PAPs lightweight.

Singapore, having lost its hinterland and surviving with nothing - not even drinking water, is run like a Corporation in fact many in the west wrote that Singapore is not a country but a corporation and should be know as Singapore Inc.For years there was a standing joke that the Singapore govt. is in every business except "Funeral Palour' even that has been breach today.

LKY, being the master tactician he is knew that devoted selfless leaders are fast diminishing and the new generation of young intelligence will not be so devoted as the Old Guards,most were chasing the five Cs and will not go into politics to do a thankless job. Hence the humongous pay packet. "Pay peanuts and you will get monkeys to do the job". With the pay goes the responsibilities and sacrifices.

Are you aware that Presidents,Ministers and high profile civil servants were removed and replaced when found they are not up to expectations or involved with scandalous or corrupt issues??? I may be wrong but most talented young Singaporeans aspire to be in the Cabinet,top civil servant and CEO of govt. back or own companies. Many aspire but few will reach that goal.Some my join foreign and multi corporation and make good in their careers and there are those that are enjoying the fruits of their fathers' labour, the rest will complain when unable to make the grade along with coffee shop scribes and MBA taxi drivers,failures through their own follies??? Who knows??? Only they can tell.

As for me, I am enjoying my retirement doing what I like and I still love this little REDDOT hoping that one day we may re merged with the land of my birth.

In a nutshell, that is how I see it as an ordinary 65 year old dinosaur. I am sure my generation and most of the in between will vote PAP with a few seats going to the oppositions but the current ones may create a freak election and that is the fear that one term of the wrong people in govt. will wipe out almost two generations of hard work.

This has been a very long post. I will explore the roots and malaise of the political consciousness of Malaysians in another post. Frankly, I am very grateful to readers who have been writing to me and sharing very intellectual exchanges with me which have actually helped me to develop maturity of thought, even as an older person. I am truly humbled that some sacrificed their time to pen their thoughts to me. If there be any of you who wish to be in touch with me, kindly leave your email address in the comment form and I will respond accordingly. Your contact details will not be published as comment moderation is enabled.

We live in very challenging and exciting times and the balance of power could tip either way. Please leave a comment if you wish. I would really love to hear your views and hopefully engage you in a lively debate. Thanks and have a pleasant evening!

WHY YOU MUST GET A DOG OR A CAT - Humor

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 02:10:00 +0000

Recently, my old friend Jan, who is also my boy's art teacher, showed me three lovely puppies (see pic above). Her son had saved them from the pound and had seen how one worker put one of the pups in a plastic bag and smashed it to death on the road. Jan is now desperately looking for people to adopt these cute pups. I would love to adopt one but my house has no garden or space for the darlings to run around. She has until this Saturday to find homes for these pups as she cannot house them in her home due to an agreement with her tenant. If you find it in your heart to adopt any one of these darlings, please leave your number/e-mail in the comment box and I will ask Jan to get in touch with you. Your contact details will NOT be published as comment moderation is enabled.

Enjoying the following post which might help you to decide to adopt one of these darlings. Thanks and have a nice day!

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WHY YOU MUST GET A DOG OR A CAT
*specially dedicated to Cat-in-Sydney and Pug

If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him, and never say its not quite as good as his mothers , please buy a dog.

If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want ... then buy a dog.

If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn't care about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies, then buy a dog.

If you want someone who is content to get on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores, then buy a dog!

If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn't care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually . . . . . then buy a dog.

BUT, on the other hand . . .

If you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness . . . . . . then buy a cat!

Have a nice day, dear reader. Please leave a comment if you wish. Thanks and have a nice day!

ABRAHAM LINCOLN, DR. ADRIAN ROGERS AND THE NEP

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 21:00:00 +0000

An anonymous commenter left this post in my blog yesterday evening at 10.49 p.m. in response to my post on THE COLOR OF HATRED. Many thanks to him/her for sharing with us. Do read it and leave a comment if you wish. Thanks and have a nice day.

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What has Abraham Lincoln and Dr. Adrian Rogers got to do with our failed NEP that UMNO seems to feel is their only lifeline to survival in this globalised world?

Answer:
You cannot take away what little the strong has and simply giving away to the so-called weak to make them strong. Everybody has to work equally hard.

Abraham Lincoln once said "You cannot make the weak strong by making the strong weak!"

An economics professor explains the whole concept of socialism extremely well. Back in 1931, Dr. Adrian Rogers was teaching at a local college. There, he made a statement that he had never failed a single student before but had once failed an entire class.

There, during an economics lesson, his students had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.

The professor then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class on socialism. All grades would be averaged and everyone would receive the same grade so no one would fail and no one would receive an A.

After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B.

The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy.

As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.

The second test average was a D! No one was happy.

When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F.

The scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.

All failed, to their great surprise, and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great but when government takes the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed.

The good professor went on to say:

"You cannot legislate the poor into freedom by legislating the wealthy out of freedom. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for; that my dear friend, is about the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it."

ROUGHED UP DEALS

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 09:45:00 +0000

School's out and my boy is at home. Today, I met up with a friend for lunch at Kirishima Japanese Restaurant and was pampered with a sashimi set and Belgian chocolates :-). I seriously believe that there is an international conspiracy to make me look the part for a Weight-loss program er...the "before weight loss part" in an advertisement, that is. Jokes aside, when I zoomed off for that appointment, I locked my bedroom and the computer room, brought the keys along and gave him ONE assignment and the password to my laptop :-). The assignment - my boy had to write and type Chapter 4 of this fantasy children's novel that he is writing. You can find Chapter 1, 2 and 3 of my son's story called BLAKELEY'S JOURNEY TO NOBLICLE at THIS LINK or you can read all three chapters at the end of the post.

* My boy is 11 years old and loves Sue Townsend's Adrian Mole series, the Diary of the Wimpy Kid series. He reads a lot including all of Roald Dahl and many classics, not forgetting the insane Horrible Science series. At the rate he devours books, I have to spend a tidy sum each month to feed his reading habit. I cannot wait for the time when he can enjoy my collection of books :-). He wrote this on his own and I did not change or correct anything so this is the RAW version.

Just in case you think he is tops in English in school, I want to say he is NOT. In fact, the teacher gives him very low marks for essay writing and it does not bother me and I have never gone to school to have a show-down with her as she is entitled to her opinion and I respect her marking and have my opinion which I keep to myself. For me, I love my boy and I know his abilities and his many stories are testimony of that so I have never and will not sweat over marks, not my style at all. His enjoyment of books, writing and the ability to express himself are far more important to me than marks in an exam. I know it is strange to some as I have been in the education industry for over 20 years. Anyway, here's CHAPTER 4 of my boy's story. Enjoy and please leave a comment if you like. Have a lovely evening.

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CHAPTER 4 ROUGHED UP DEALS

Blakely and Scorchio dashed through the swamp to make it to Mount Urrulorgh. It was a thirty-five thousand feet high volcano. After it erupted , it became a habitat for the giant. Blakely opened the Book of Knowledge and looked under the name "giants".The Book of Knowledge said that giants had only one weakness, and that was magic. Blakely immediately turned to a page which listed down all the spells all wizards will know.

The lists of spells were as many as six pages in "8" font size! The spells were like "transfera identica" to switch bodies with another person and "fireballs" to shoot deadly chunks of fire. Blakely couldn't wait to fight the giant because he was going to surprise it with a fireball. Blakely started climbing up the volcano with the help of Scorchio. By the time Blakely reached the entrance of the cave, Blakely was exhausted. He had been climbing up the volcano for more than nine hours.

The cave was gigantic! Blakely and Scorchio ran to the deeper part of the cave, and there laid the giant. He quickly super-sized himself by shouting "Superior Analatica" and that woke up the giant. The giant was not happy that it had an unwelcome visitor. Blakely did not waste any time so he blinded the giant with a spell. He quickly took this opportunity and stabbed the moaning giant on its chest. It was over. Blakely got back to work and sawed off one of the giant's tooth and pulled out a strand of its hair. Blakely sawed off a few more teeth from the giant to be kept as souvenirs.

Blakely quickly returned to Snubby's caravan. It was around midnight when Blakely returned to his caravan. Snubby was asleep. Blakely needed some sleep too, therefore he sat an antique chair and closed his eyes. The next day, Blakely got into the bathroom to have a shower and changed into his old uniform. Snubby was going to drive to a small town called "Papillion" in his caravan. He also added that his second quest was also going to be a bit difficult. After Snubby drove for an hour or two, he finally reached a town called "Papillion". Blakely and Scorchio were terrified as they entered the gates of the run-down town.

Snubby brought Blakely to see a black magician who lived in a small atap house. The black magician identified himself as Le Patron. Le Patron was an old man who has been having a small business for the past twenty-nine years. He had a sharp crooked nose just like any other magician. Snubby spoke to Le Patron in a foreign language in a distinct manner. Blakely was brought to an underground tunnel to take down the most wanted person in the town "Papillion". The thirty-seven year old criminal was known as Pablo Dmitri.

It was said that Pablo Dmitri was found dead by the moors but apparently, he had a coincidental plastic surgery to make some adjustments on his face. The smart but evil man must have dug out a dead body from the graveyard, change its face to make it look like him and left it by the moors. Blakely was up to the fight. He was warned that Pablo Dmitri's hideout was surrounded by security guards and they were armed. The whole underground tunnel was CCTV activated. Scorchio was ready to get rid of some guards.

"You are to wear this helmet and carry this torch to light the way into Pablo's hideout. Many people have tried to break into Pablo Dmitri's hideout but all have failed,"said Le Patron.

"Watch out for obstacles, good luck on your adventure," said Snubby.

Blakely and Scorchio then ran into the deeper part of the tunnel to continue their adventure.
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BLAKELY'S JOURNEY TO NOBLICLE - written by Nicholas Khor (copyrighted)

PROLOGUE

The city of Larousse was in danger. The fairy king's emerald crown had been stolen by SBSN (Secret Branch Society of Noblicle). The sun never shone again after that and the people lost their power because of the magic sunshine. Lives were lost when a trail of wagons crashed into the gates of the castle and strange explosions caused a fire that spread through the city. It was bad enough that the city was having drought problems but the Nobgoblins had to worsen the situation with their vicious attacks.

In a bid to defend his city, King Alteon, the fairy king, fought the leader of the SBSN in a hand combat and ended up being pushed out of the window of his castle. Before slipping into a coma, the fairy king put a princely sum for the Nobgoblins' heads. Two months later, he died.

Blakely, a villager from far off near the coast, heard about the reward from his grandfather and decided to go on an adventure to the city of Larousse for more information and to help them.

CHAPTER 1 THE FIRST OBSTACLE - WITCHES & LEPRECHAUNS

"Blakely, you don't have to do it. You will suffer pain and it might be hell throughout the journey," said his grandfather while Blakely was packing his bags.

Blakely did not mind the burden or the challenges ahead. All he wanted was for peace and sunshine to return to the city.

"Grandpa, goodbye," said Blakely while he put his magic sword in his bag. Those were his last words to his grandpa. He walked down the lane that led into the wilderness, where the leprechauns and medieval witches lived.

Soon enough, his intuitive senses told him that something was wrong. Suddenly, there were funny sounds coming from behind him. He turned around and saw something green and yellow moving in the bushes. Blakely was terrified and picked up a rock and walked to the bushes.

A cute little creature popped out from the bushes and smiled at Blakely. He was so relieved that it wasn't any leprechaun that could transform him into a rat with the snap of his finger. All of a sudden, three leprechauns pounced on him and captured him with their "Gravity Force Net".

Blakely was then taken to their hideout deep in the forest. He was tied up with the roots of strange plants and was forced to explain why he had ventured into their territory. When they threatened to imprison him forever, Blakely told them about his quest to Noblicle to retrieve the fairy king's emerald crown.

To his surprise, they all smiled at each other and then one of them said "You, a simple human being, have a good heart. We are happy with you and want you to meet our queen."

With that, they led Blakely to a secret chamber in the cave, a place that showcased the treasures and wealth of the leprechauns.

Blakely gasped when he saw a familiar face. It was a lady from his village who was being pampered by leprechauns and she was dressed in robes of a medieval witch.

"Sheila! What on earth are you doing here?" cried Blakely in surprise.

"My name is not Sheila when I am in this land that I own. You shall call me Alianor. Guards! Make him sit on the chair of heads! You still remember Grimlock, right?"

The guards forced him to sit on the chair and he was tied up again. These were no ordinary guards but Minotaurs.

Obviously, Blakely was not going to enjoy this conversation.

Sheila waved something in the air and soon they were transported into an empty room.

"Alright, Blakely, you want to see the Nobgoblins pay for their evil deeds, don't you? Well, the Gordon you have right now is going to help you to get what you want," said Sheila.

"This is a Gordon? What are Gordons used for?" asked Blakely.

"You will need this book. Although it is quite hungry, it is still useful," replied Sheila while taking out a book from a puff of smoke that appeared before her after she summoned it. Then she gave Blakely the book with a faint smile on her face.

To Blakely's horror, the book was slimy and breathing. "Is this drool from somewhere or someone?"asked Blakely.

Sheila said, "It's the book's drool. Remember - the Nobgoblins are very merciless creatures. Before you go to Noblicle, please go to the red swamp of Tyrantland. Find Snubby the imp and he will reward you with something after you accomplish the mission that he gives you," said Sheila."Farewell my brave friend and I bid you good luck."

Sheila then summoned a ring of fire that teleported Blakely out of the magic room.

Blakely then found himself in the wilderness again. "I'm going to find Snubby no matter what, even if it means death." Feeling tired, he took out his tent which was kept in his bag and set up camp on an empty plot of land to rest for the night.

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CHAPTER TWO - A DAY WITH THE GORDON

Blakely gathered some firewood to set up a fire to keep warm for the night. Before dusk, he started reading the book that Sheila had given him. He placed the book on his lap and all of a sudden, the book began to spit at him.

"I wish Sheila had not given me this idiotic book!" screamed Blakely. He picked up a few leaves and dropped them into the open book and closed it angrily. After a while, he opened the book again and to his surprise, the leaves had disappeared. Instead, there were some digestive juices that stained the pages. Blakely then flicked to the first page of the book.

"Hello. I am the Book of Knowledge and I shall serve you because you have saved me from starvation," said the book. "Flip to page 36 to discover more about Gordons.

The Gordon stood on its hind legs looking at Blakely happily. It had green fur on it back and fluffy yellow fur on its chest.The Gordon also had two legs and a pair of long arms.

Blakely was amazed to find out that Gordons love to steal and to play. However, they did not like to fight. There were various names Blakely could give his Gordons such as Publies, Scorchio, Bluror and Muggary. He named his Gordon Scorchio. At once, it started to act like a warrior and he found its actions very cute.

Night was drawing close so Blakely had his dinner - plain herbs and wild fruits. His meal did not smell so fresh so he left it aside. He was going to starve that night. Suddenly, he heard a zapping sound. Scorchio shot some laser beams from its eyes onto his food and then growled at Blakely. Turning around, Blakely caught the smell of escargots that came from the herbs on his plate. Scorchio smiled at Blakely while he ate the escargots and herbs hungrily. Then, Blakely knew that Scorchio had magical powers. Feeling satisfied after a good meal, Blakely put out the fire and slept in his tent.

The next morning, he took a walk and stumbled upon a house in the woods.

Scorchio growled at Blakely and started to push Blakely into the bushes. Scorchio ran towards the door and hit it hard with its head, causing the door to break open. Scorchio dashed inside and Blakely followed behind.

Scorchio ran towards a chest of drawers and opened one drawer after another, looking for money. It squealed in delight when it found a few gold coins. Blakely quickly grabbed Scorchio and forced him out of the house and then they jumped into the bushes to hide. To his surprise, Scorchio still had a bit of coins in its mouth and it spat them onto its hand and kept them in Blakely's coat pocket.

There was no where left to go and nothing left to do so Blakely decided to return to the tent. Blakely took out his bag, dismantled the tent and kept it in his bag. He decided that the time had come for him to go to Tyrantland straight away.

CHAPTER 3 SNUBBY'S QUEST

Blakely calmly took the road that led to Tyrantland. He had heard that Tyrantland did not have any clean drinking water for the ground was covered with cracks and dried leaves shed by the barren trees. He crossed many bridges and hiked many hills before reaching Tyrantland. By then, he was completely exhausted.

While he was walking along a narrow road, he heard the beating of some drums and the sound of some ancient music being played from afar. Scorchio ran straight ahead and Blakely had no choice but to catch up with him. After a few minutes, he was panting and saw a sign that read "TYRANNIA". Then he became quite confused between Tyrantland and Tyrannia so he continued to run after Scorchio who had surged ahead.

At last, Blakely found Scorchio with a group of strange people who were gasping in delight as they gazed at a fire-eater who was juggling a few torches.Blakely then took the opportunity to ask a few of them for some information about Snubby the Imp. He was then told to go to the edge of the town where he lived in his caravan.

Blakely opened his Book of Knowledge to find out what attracted imps. "You must have plenty of water and some honey. They love to gamble with cards most of the time. By then, Scorchio started to have a headache and jumped into Blakely's bag to rest. Blakely remembered the money that Scorchio had stolen . With it, he bought three jars of honey. Scorchio started to whimper when they were at the stall. Blakely suspected something was amiss and turned to his left.

A small dwarf was standing beside him and staring at the bottles of honey.

"For me? asked the dwarf, pleading again and again.

"For Snubby," replied Blakely.

"Get into my caravan and I'll tell you something. Who does not know the famous gambler in Tyrannia? Hah!" laughed the dwarf.

"I am the person you are looking for, Snubby, the King of Cards. Muaaahahahaha! cried the dwarf.

Blakely had no idea that this would happen.

"What I want from you is for you to explain in detail my character as you must be very intelligent since you are such a good card player," said Blakely softly.

"That's kids' stuff for me. Correction - donkey work to be more precise. You are very good when it comes to outdoor activities but you do not have much brains, air head!" laughed Snubby wickedly.

"But you can be very emotional and have great potential to be a good leader," added Snubby with a smile on his face.

"What is my precise task over here? Why was I told to come to Tyrannia to look for you?" asked Blakely as he shrugged his shoulders with a puzzled look on his face.

"Your mission is to retrieve King Alteon's crown. A witch told you that you have to go on my quests for some reward. Alianor never knows how to keep her mouth shut, does she? replied Snubby.

"Well, since you want my quest, you've got it," said Snubby with a sneering look.

"So what is my quest?" asked Blakely again.

"It's quite simple really. But you will need an armour to protect your body from danger. I'll also give you some robes that belonged to a famous wizard of old. Your pet would need something too. I'll give it a solid iron armour that belonged to one of my pets," said Snubby.

"Do you have a changing room in your caravan?" asked Blakely.

"Go straight till you reach the end. The room is on your left. Be careful, though, because the caravan is a bit run down," replied Snubby.

Blakely looked quite odd in the very mythical-looking robes and so did Scorchio in his iron armour that had many Aztec designs.

"Your first quest is to run on the tracks to cross the red swamp which is just behind my house. Climb the mountain and enter the cave where a giant lives. I want you to get me one of his teeth and a strand of his hair. By the way, what's your pet's name?"

"Snubby, meet Scorchio. Please don't pat him as he will bite," warned Blakely.

"You had better set off on your quest before time runs out. The color of the crown is starting to change from green to red. The city of Larousse will become extinct if the crown turns completely red," said Snubby.

"Alright! Off we'll go now!" See ya!" cried Blakely as he ran off with Scorchio.

"Good luck! Remember - the tooth and just a strand of hair.

*to be continued*

Written by Nicholas Khor

WITTY SAYINGS FROM TOMMY COOPER - COMIC GENIUS

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 01:00:00 +0000

My friend Freddie emailed the following list of witty sayings to me yesterday. They are truly gems which will certainly make you smile and jumpstart your Monday. Enjoy these and have a great day!!

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1. Two blondes walked into a building..........you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

2. Phone answering machine message - '...If you want marijuana, press the hash key...'

3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Gladwrap for shorts. The shrink says, 'Well, I can clearly see you're nuts.'

4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

5. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, 'No, the steaks are too high..'

6. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.

7. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, 'Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!' The doctor replied, 'I know you can't, I've cut your arms off'..

8. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.

9. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

10. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands.. Police say that he topped himself.

11. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc says 'I'll give you some cream to put on it.'

12. 'Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home'. 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.' 'Is it common? ' 'It's not unusual'.

13. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. 'My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?' 'Well,' says the vet, 'let's have a look at him' So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says, 'I'm going to have to put him down.' 'What? Because he's cross-eyed? 'No, because he's really heavy'

14. Guy goes into the doctor's. 'Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my backside.' 'How's that?' the doctor asks. 'Don't you start' says the guy.

15. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!

16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

17. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'

18. Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I think it's Colin.

19. Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other 'Your round.' The other one says 'So are you, you fat bast**d!'

20. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

21. 'You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.'

22. A man walked into the doctors, he said, 'I've hurt my arm in several places' The doctor said, 'Well don't go there anymore'

23. Ireland 's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.

THE COLOUR OF HATRED

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 05:00:00 +0000

The current BTN debate reeks of pathetic denials and lame statements to justify the perpetuation of a course that is supposedly held for government servants and scholars of ONE race even though a leader publicly announced that it is "for all and not just for federal government supporters". Click HERE and HERE and also THIS LINK to read more.

When a nation has a program which blatantly emphasizes ethnocentrism and accents racist tendencies abetted by media on a mission to promote racist slants in their reports to obscure political, social and spiritual process, how are we expected to react? The mass media disseminates and processes distorted/bias information on a continual basis orchestrated with the sole objective to turn the minds of the young against groups perceived to be threats to the nation (even if these are against moral/religious beliefs) as instruments of social fragmentation! With that, the puppet masters, who pull their strings via controls on the media, are utterly delighted that their schemes and ploys are given public endorsement by these puppets and other players in the game.

With all the progress that we claim we have achieved, we must acknowledge that the term/concept of racism has become nothing but a misnomer, as there are no other races on Earth, other than the Human Race. Let us remember that the word "race" is a singular term that refers to a singular family of man, with a common ancestry, of spiritual and biological descent from the first man and first woman. However, realistically, a pluralized term for race, in reference to mankind does not exist. So why emphasize differences and breed prejudice?

Many fail to realize that racism is actually a deceptive political policy, devised by political and economic scientists for many reasons including :

* to disrupt social order
* to conceal and justify the implementation of covert political agendas
* to stabilize or improve the economic advantages of the privileged elite, and thereby maintain the political position of the ruling party.

Much as we hate to admit it, we can see that by deliberately dividing the members of one society into ethnic groups and then to deliberately emphasize those differences overtly and covertly, governments are actually protecting the elite and consolidating their power over the masses.

What sort of mentality will those graduates of BTN develop when the facilitators ram the propaganda of BTN down their throats? How will they perceive the deprivation concealed in legislation that overtly favors corporate development over the survival of politically oppressed citizens? I wonder if they would justify government campaigns of public misinformation, waged through government regulated or owned media that have been professionally designed to sway public opinion to favor the governing practice of elite accommodation.

Chances are, many would not be able to engage rationally in political process and economic advantage because they have gone through sessions that centre on and delight in the vilification of its intended victims who are wrongly perceived as a threat to the nation. When groups can be targeted and promoted in 'racial' campaigns and designated as socially inferior or politically inept or as enemies, I shudder at the thought of what awaits us in the near future, a future which is being manipulated by the forces/powers that be for their evil and greedy agenda.

Do not forget that the current deterioration in education standards has practically robbed the youth of the ability to think, to rationalize and to go through logical patterns of reasoning. If so, it may mean that those who go through the BTN, may accept, believe and endorse all the propaganda and worse still, spread this message to others with whom they come into contact.

The young are the nation's human resources and valuable assets which should be nurtured and then we can harvest the fruit of these resources. However, if we put weedkillers in their minds, we would be harvesting poisoned fruits of destruction in the future!!!

We must acknowledge that the whole concept of “racism” is a deliberate political act - one that has its roots in history because we can see that it was programmed to enable colonial and industrialized world governments, to justify the unequal distribution of wealth, through the vilification of their intended victims.

Verifying the faulted reasoning via statements of denial or fallacies that the government presents to us and vilifying the victims would enable a government to establish them as detrimental to the development and general welfare of the state. What we see is a system capable of the mass manipulation of public opinion who are unwilling to deal fairly and share, on equal terms, the wealth in future economic prospects.

This prejudicial political process, allows governments the freedom, to discriminate against groups of people/races, to acquire unfairly their resources without payment. Government sponsored, socially engineered programs are used to misdirect public perception as to origin of social issues, thus 'race card' is depicted as innate to various ethnic traits, groups and social classes to confuse and misinform the public about social issues for social division.

Many individuals who make a lot of money using their personal 'Race" card will not want to give up their specially acquired but natural status.

We see a tendency to perpetuate labels which are for those who can't think independently. Labels are for lemmings! Everyone has the capacity to think and feel the correctness, truth and quality of a person and his/her message.

Ignorance and prejudice are not spontaneous or natural occurrences, they are choices. Racial prejudice is conduct-based, racial superiority, instilled through example and not behavior learned through previous experience, as it is said to be. Ignorance is not an inborn hatred nor is it an excuse for not knowing the truth. Ignorance is choosing not to recognize the truth. Today, we can see that on every level of social strata, government to citizen, landlord to tenant, employer to employee.

Racism and ignorance are subtle political and business techniques and now, we see it being publicly endorsed in the name of nation building! What a joke!

Theoretically, when racism and ignorance become techniques for hiring, selling or legislating it is discrimination. Discrimination is not discernment, nor is it wise, as those who practice racial discrimination would have you believe.

A climate of fear does not spell much hope for our nation and yet some spread such fears in institutions that brainwash others! Fear can take the form of racism, sexism, lying, cheating, name-calling, rumor and innuendo mongering. It's ugly and it does not become us, not if we want to be a developed nation in every sense of the word. Let's face it. Fear is irrational. It has no reason; it simply lurks within a heart and obliterates the light. Fear is the very reason why nations are at war. It causes sicknesses!

In a climate of fear, people may pass on information that is without verifiable truth, because it supports their fear that stems from a false notion that the benefits enjoyed by others will be at the expense of “their” personal good. This is categorically a lie. My good is not at the expense of yours. There is enough, plenty, for everyone, if only we learn to respect each other and learn to share!!!

Malaysians can figure out for themselves what is Truth and not; but the key to this is that we have assess each scenario with an open mind and an open heart without fear that can obscure us from ever hearing what others have to say, let alone giving ourselves the opportunity to FEEL the truth or experience their beauty. Fear and hatred that we harbor in our hearts would define our experiences!

Let us come to terms with the fact that some may be afraid of those of different colors, different creeds, and different ideas. Still, let us love them and listen with an open mind and open heart and not to do as what is taught by bigots.

This is no airy fairy exercise!!! Our country is only as good as the citizens who comprise it. If we proclaim 1Malaysia but clearly hate certain Malaysians, how can this Nation stand? It won't. If this situation persists, our nation cannot stand tall in this global village and may disintegrate with seige mentality while doing a 'jaguh kampung' jig without realizing that we are but a small dot on this planet! It will crumble from within; and it won't take any foreign enemy to bury us. All it takes is ourselves!!!

Our country is 52 years old. It takes clear hearts and clear minds to deal with serious problems that beset this nation and show respect to fellow citizens in a harmonious environment.

It's time to grow up, Malaysians. We can conduct healthy, spirited debates and actually learn from each other. Only fear closes our ears to what someone has to say. It costs us nothing to listen with our minds and our hearts. Times are changing, as they always do. Let us be good stewards of democracy. We have nothing to fear, except fear; because fear will undermine us and crumble us from the inside out.

The rakyat are crying for positive change.Let us act responsibly as instruments for change. Change is a Choice. Work together with the right perspective without clinging on to blind and foolish party loyalty. Stand up and identify ourselves simply as HUMAN BEINGS, members of the Earth, humans sharing this land, this Planet with others of our KIND without forgetting that We are born to One Race, the Human Race.

This will not eliminate the Hatred that has been taught and promoted by many over the decades by the powers that be through various programs both overtly and covertly. Bollocks to such overtures! Knowledge is Power. With it, we can see truth as the Light that changes perceptions. With love in our hearts, we can change the World but it has to begin with you and me. We must stop whining about change; instead, we have to go out and make that change. Spread the word that there is only ONE COLOUR - that of the human race, not of hatred! Are we ready?

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If you have time, please check out my post called HITLER'S POLICIES - DO THEY HAVE A FAMILIAR RING?. Thanks! Have a lovely evening.

REFLECTIONS AND MORE REFLECTIONS

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 10:05:00 +0000

Throughout my life, I have made friends and enemies. Who hasn't? In school, while appearing quiet and subdued in class, I was vociferous and boisterous with my friends. It is normal for us to behave differently in a variety of situations. Having said that,that I have a very sharp tongue and unknowingly hurt some students in the past. With the passing years, I learnt much patience,tolerance and the importance of sensitivity to the feelings of others with the occasional hiccups and bungles in interpersonal relationships - after all, I am human.

Sometimes in life, when we meet those who have hurt or disappointed us, it may not be that easy to forgive and even if we do, it may not be easy to forget. Frankly, I do not bear grudges at all, especially while serving as a teacher and lecturer, or even in my social circles. Some students could have been absolutely rude, naughty, rebellious, lazy etc. but once I pointed out their faults, they would be reminded that I was correcting the fault and not attacking the person and that those run-ins would have no bearing on the way I assessed their assignments or exam scripts. The usual stunned response would follow but in time, these students would know that I meant every single word that I said.

When I was teaching in an international school, a lovely Gujerati girl joined my Year 9 Sociology class. My Sociology classes were very energetic, challenging and required lots of reading, assignments, presentations and discussions on current sociological classes - only the tough would dare to join my Sociology/Economics classes (in fact, this pattern persisted when I was lecturing in another college).

Somehow, the vibrant tempo of my lessons scared her off to the extent that she did not come to school for one week!! At that time, I was the Head of Pastoral Care for the Upper School (Year 10,11) and my colleague (Head of Pastoral Care, Lower School) told me the news. Naturally, I was flabbergasted. How on earth could I have terrified her to the extent that she was willing to face disciplinary action for skipping school? Immediately, I called her home, spoke to her parents and later on, exchanged a few words with her. She came back the next day. Subsequently, her father came to see me during Parent-Teacher Conference and we discussed the situation most amicably.

That was in 1993.

From that time, Nital and I developed a friendship that went beyond the classroom. After I left that school, we never lost touch. She went to KL to do her A levels and then to University of Bath for her first degree and then to KL for her masters and then she joined an American MNC as an engineer. Recently, she resigned from her job and is in the process of applying for her doctoral studies in US.

Nital and I meet up quite often for tea, dinner, sometimes lunch and occasionally visits me at my home. A few weeks ago, when I was down with a very bad bout of vertigo, she took me to the clinic and much later, I realized that it was her birthday! Such is her selfless-nature!

Last night, we met up again for dinner with my family and a mutual friend with whom she worked with in the same department. The other friend treated us to dinner at Paddington's House of Pancakes. I had Alabama - grilled chicken with creamy sauce over pancakes, my dear husband had smoked salmon while my son had some stuff with salami and another friend had sausages etc and Nital had a vegetarian dish.

Later that evening, Nital treated us to chocolate ice-cream fondue at Haagen Daas. i am glad Nital saw beyond her fear of me and that we forged and have maintained such a beautiful friendship through the years....Thanks, sweetheart. Love you lots! (And I am trying to find her a good match :-).Hint!!!)

In times like these, I look back on the years or even months that have gone by and I think about the many friends I have made and lost. A friend is someone who is honest and we can trust, with whom we can hang out with a lot, and some one we rely on because we share a common bond.

The events in the past year have made me into a social recluse. There have been times when I felt I could click with someone and then my words or actions could have caused that person to exit from my life. And believe me, it is very painful indeed when that happens and when overtures to make amends hit a brick wall. I am still trying to come to grips with some scenarios, one of which was with the closest friend that my husband and I had for over 22 years. All of a sudden, it was silence after one last dinner at Jade Garden in Pavillion. And of course there are one or two more friends I lost along the way...Yet, I still hold them dear to my heart despite the wall of cold silence and remember them very fondly, replaying the moments shared, emails exchanged and beautiful moments that I cherish deeply.

When waves of sentimentalism hit me, tears begin to flow and I wonder why some cannot forgive or let go of the mistakes I made, despite my apologies. In one or two cases, I honestly did not do or say anything wrong and till today, know not why things developed as such. Friendship isn't be inseparable. It is being separated and knowing nothing will change.
In other situations, I was wronged and I walked away without bothering to explain myself. I used to but not anymore for I feel that it is not worth it. There are some things of worth and others which are not and I have learnt to hold on to what matters and to let go of what does not. Some may wonder why I do not adopt a harsh or hard-hitting approach in my social interaction or in my blog and some may even wonder if I am too soft or compliant.

The truth is, I am a very fierce, hot-headed and aggressive woman with a very sharp tongue indeed. However, my experiences in the past few years have taught me that sometimes it is better to win the person and lose the battle than to won the battle and lose the friend/student. Aggression gets me nowhere, at the same time, groveling is not my style. I think the worst thing in any relationship is not a quarrel but cold-blooded silence of rejection as seen in the facial expressions or in e-mails that elicit no response or heard in the coldness of one's voice or seen in the body language or worse still, in all the areas I mentioned! Often times, I wonder why some choose that path but I judge them not but mourn the loss and move on, still, with the hope of reconciliation some day.

Yet, I cannot imagine a life without friends. Friends bring about a sense of balance in one's life and allow one to enjoy life fully. As Samuel Johnson remarks, "True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in their worth and choice."

Friends are not quite like anyone else in one's life, one is apprehensive in others' lives, concerns, and general well-being. Friends make others feel superior, are attentive, and long to be around under any circumstances. With time, the result of such qualities allows a relationship to be factual, blissful, emotionally stable, and have a unique bond. A friend "for a lifetime" provides respect, integrity, loyalty, and honesty in a relationship.

Making friends for a lot of us comes naturally, but maintaining these friendships may become somewhat difficult. This is because true friendship cannot survive without love, respect and honesty. If any of these aspects are lacking in the friendship, it will slowly disintegrate. True friendship needs equal shares of love, respect and honesty. Therefore, to maintain true friendship, you need the whole package, just not apart of it.

Love is naturally a part of any relationship. In a friendship, love can mean so many things. It means being there when your friend needs you, no matter what the circumstances may be. It means listening to your friend’s problems and giving them advice to help them out when they are not sure what to do. Or love can just mean giving your friend a hug to show them how much you care. When each friend feels this love, they feel respected. Love ties into respect, which is another important part of true friendship.

Respect is a quality in which one views others in high regard. One shares respect in a friendship. To gain one's respect, one should show respect for others. For instance, if the respect is not mutual the relationship will not have an assured outcome. A friend is respectful when one is content to be oneself. The amount of respect will never change under any situation. One's thoughts and perception is the same no matter who is around. Respectful friends do not violate or interfere with one's personal space. True friends understand the appropriate actions to take to clarify the issue. Not only do true friends protect one another, but one also knows when to back off. Respect is the treatment of others in a kind and considerate manner. Respect in a friendship is just not given, it’s earned. One appreciates the ways in which he or she is unique. An open mind allows a respectful friendship to be everlasting - and that is a precious lesson that I have learnt from blogging.

Human survival is based on friendship. From the highest authority to the lowest bums living on the streets all of them have experienced in some way or the other one of different kinds of friendships. We take this friendship for granted because it is something that exists naturally in society and most of us never really have to actually go out into the world looking for a friend. We cannot thrive successfully as individuals or as a society without having some form of friendship with other individuals at different stages of our lives. Mark Twain said, "Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it with."

Frankly, I am deeply grateful that you, dear reader, has taken the time to read my post. It means a lot to me - the knowledge that someone out there is reading my thoughts and even more, when/if you leave a comment. Thanks for allowing me to divide my joys with you and I pray that we will be blessed with more real and genuine friends in our lives. Remember that true friendship cannot be seen with our eyes...but felt in our hearts...

To all my friends in the past and present, thanks for enriching my life! Those moments will never be forgotten just as sure as your precious e-mails or sms messages are not deleted. This is for you...

Please leave a comment if you wish. I would love to hear from you. Thanks.Take care and have a lovely evening!

CHUCKLES FOR SATURDAY MORNING

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 22:00:00 +0000

The following jokes were sent to me by Freddie, my cousin's friend, who has now become a friend. Freddie and I love movies, good food and jokes. If any of you have stuff to share, do send it to me via the comment form and it will be published separately as a post. Comment moderation is enabled so if you need to contact me via the blog, what you write will not be automatically posted. Thanks and have a nice day!

_________________________________________________________________________
1) NUDITY

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'

2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'

3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'

5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop? Yes,' I answered and continued writing the report. 'My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police.

Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as
she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'

6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked.

'It sure is,' I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do?'

7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'

8) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.'
'And why not, darling?'
'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.'

9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt.

Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.

The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Father, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!)

10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'

11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. 'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out.

'What have you got there, dear?' With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam's underwear!'

Have a nice day!!!

HITLER'S POLICIES - DO THEY HAVE A FAMILIAR RING?

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 07:50:00 +0000

Do you know how Hitler won support for his policies? Many must have wondered how on earth a narrow-minded, low ranking racist colonel and his ideas could catapult to such a powerful and well-respected position in his extremist party to put in place a reign of terror that led to the deaths of millions? It is through propaganda - the use of usually biased or misleading information to promote or publicize a specific political view or cause.

Its objective is to influence the attitude of a community toward some cause or position. As opposed to impartially providing information, propaganda in its most basic sense, presents information primarily to influence an audience. Propaganda often presents facts selectively (thus lying by omission) to encourage a particular synthesis, or uses loaded messages to produce an emotional rather than rational response to the information presented. The desired result is a change of the attitude toward the subject in the target audience to further a political agenda.

Wikipedia provides a detailed account of this man who shaped history:

Adolf Hitler, 20 April 1889 – 30 April 1945) was an Austrian-born German politician and the leader of the National Socialist German Workers Party, popularly known as the Nazi Party. He was the authoritarian leader of Germany from 1933 to 1945, serving as chancellor from 1933 to 1945 and as head of state from 1934 to 1945.

A decorated veteran of World War I, Hitler joined the Nazi Party (DAP) in 1919 and became leader of NSDAP in 1921. Following his imprisonment after a failed coup in Bavaria in 1923, he gained support by promoting German nationalism, anti-semitism, anti-capitalism, and anti-communism with charismatic oratory and propaganda. He was appointed chancellor in 1933, and quickly transformed the Weimar Republic into the Third Reich, a single-party dictatorship based on the totalitarian and autocratic ideals of national socialism. Please CLICK HERE to read more

Learn about Hitler and the Nazis

Under Hitler, the hospital was a living graveyard where Nazis wanted anyone who was Jewish, Catholic, homosexual, mentally or physically handicapped and not considered ideal ( by Hitler's definition) to die! With the rise of Hitler, one of the greatest travesties in history occurred: the rise of the Nazis, World War II, and the Holocaust.

Hitler was a firm believer in the need to indoctrinate Nazi ideology early and the power of young people in ensuring the continued vitality of the “Thousand Year Reich.” The Hitler Youth was based on Hitler’s anti-intellectualism, focusing on military training in preparation for becoming a soldier at 18.

We can see that in Germany, propaganda did all kinds of things successfully; it included tricking people like young boys into becoming a Hitler Youth, or a soldier for his country. Hitler’s right-hand man and Reich Minister of Propaganda was named Joseph Goebbels. Goebbels was one of the main reasons that Nazi Germany got so far and was so successful. Without him, Nazi Germany would not have even lifted off the ground. Without him, no one would have listened to what Hitler had to say. Because of him, Germany gathered a strong army and was able to invade most of Europe, some of Asia, and some of North Africa.

According to Wikipedia on Goebbels:

One of his first acts was the burning of books rejected by the Nazis. He exerted totalitarian control over the media, arts, and information in Germany. In that position, he perfected an understanding of the "Big Lie" technique of propaganda, which is based on the principle that a lie, if audacious enough and repeated enough times, will be believed by the masses.

Does it not sound familiar to you?

Propaganda did not happen just with Nazi Germany. We see it all over the world and even closer to home if you get my drift. It can be issued every day in speeches, articles, programs and other formats. Leaders use propaganda to express ideas in a biased and misleading form to fulfill THEIR agenda. For example, one could use propaganda in daily conversations to express feelings about one subject by giving false information to support a cause.

At this point of time, we have to separate the wheat from the chaff, to separate what is useful or valuable from what is worthless and to teach everyone regardless of age, color, creed to do the same in the name of nation building. We must not fall prey to any form of deceitful or malicious propaganda but see each other as one. Perhaps then we can together proclaim 1Malaysia.

In closing, let's consider the beautiful lyrics of my favorite patriotic song Malaysia Berjaya, written by Saiful Bahri and performed by Jamaludin Alias which was given wide air-time play by Radio Televisyen Malaysia (RTM) in the late 1960s and early 1970s. With one voice, let's proclaim MALAYSIA BERJAYA!

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN TO MALAYSIA BERJAYA

Malaysia kita sudah berjaya,
Aman makmur bahagia
Malaysia abadi selamanya,
Berjaya dan berjaya!

Berbagai kaum sudah berikrar
Menjunjung cita-cita
Satu bangsa satu negara
Malaysia berjaya!

Dari Perlis hinggalah ke Sabah
Kita sudah merdeka
Negara makmur rakyat mewah
Kita sudah berjaya!

Dengar semboyan kita berjaya
Bergema di angkasa
Satu bangsa satu negara
Malaysia berjaya!

English translations

Our Malaysia has succeeded
Peaceful and radiant
Malaysia forever shall you live
and achieve more success!

The people have pledged
to strive for the aspiration
Of one people, one nation
Successful Malaysia!

From Perlis to Sabah
We are now free
A prosperous nation, with affluent people
We have succeeded!

With the bugle we sound our success
Shooting for the stars
One people, one nation
Successful Malaysia!

SPECIALLY FOR MY MUSLIM FRIENDS AND READERS

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 00:37:00 +0000

Eid al-Adha "Festival of Sacrifice" or "Greater Eid" is a holiday celebrated by Muslims (including the Druze) worldwide to commemorate the willingness of Ibrahim to sacrifice his son as an act of obedience to God. Eid al-Adha is the latter of two Eid festivals celebrated by Muslims, whose basis comes from the Quran. Like Eid al-Fitr, Eid al-Adha begins with a short prayer followed by a sermon (khuṭba).

Eid al-Adha annually falls on the 10th day of the month of Dhul Hijja of the lunar Islamic calendar. The festivities last for three days or more depending on the country. Eid al-Adha occurs the day after the pilgrims conducting Hajj, the annual pilgrimage to Mecca in Saudi Arabia by Muslims worldwide, descend from Mount Arafat. It happens to be approximately 70 days after the end of the month of Ramadan.

I would like to wish all Muslim friends and readers, Selamat Hari Raya Eid al-Adha. May the Almighty accept all the sacrifices and good deeds you have made in the past year.

Special wishes to my blogger friends, readers and followers:

*My apologies if I have left out your name - it does not mean you are not important to me but it is due to my forgetfulness :-)

Datin Mamasita and Dato' Sakmongkol
Cat-in-Sydney
Saudara Nick
Chahya
Oldstock
Nerdcore
antimamak* updated
Kak Ezza
Kak Teh
Shinelight
Kak Pah
Saya/Freda
Ahan
Dr. Tranquility
caupcakesconfetti
Nazli Bakht
Wafi Selamat
dinwaja
Arshad Ahmad
Wenger Khairy
and all other followers listed in invisible mode and other Muslim readers who read my blog

If there be any of my Muslim friends and readers who are presently in the Holy Land as the guests of Allah, I pray for your safe return and may you have spiritually meaningful experiences in the Holy Land.

REVAMPING BTN? - A FORMIDABLE TASK INDEED!

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 09:09:00 +0000

If something does not work, do you still use it? The answer is obvious. Now, if you have been appointed as the chief executive officer of Performance Management and Delivery Unit (PEMANDU), the organisation that oversees the implementation of the Key Performance Index (KPI) initiatives, you would be driven to revamp BTN courses after acknowledging a week earlier that it did not promote the 1 Malaysia concept. I am sure you would expect a firm backing such a move from fellow leaders. However, life is almost always full of mysteries.

The Malaysian Insider OVER HERE reported:

The deputy prime minister denied that the courses, which are compulsory for civil servants and public university undergraduates, are aimed at “converting” participants to the political ideology of Umno and Barisan Nasional (BN).

His defence of the BTN courses comes a day after the Selangor Pakatan Rakyat (PR) administration moved to bar its civil servants and students from state-owned institutions from the course described as racist and a form of political indoctrination by the federal government.

PR leaders have accused the federal government of using the BTN courses to “brainwash” participants.

It has been reported that participants of BTN courses were repeatedly told of the concept of Ketuanan Melayu, or Malay superiority. Participants are also told not to question “Malay rights” and the “social contract.”

“There are no ulterior motives. These courses are well intended,” Muhyiddin said in Muar today.

He claimed that the Selangor state government had been misinformed and given a wrong impression of the courses.

But his comments today appear to run counter to a proposal by his own Cabinet colleague Datuk Seri Idris Jala to revamp BTN courses in an acknowledgement that it did not promote the 1 Malaysia concept.

You can read another version in The Star AT THIS LINK and what the Selangor government feels about the BTN at THIS LINK. Please read the comments from readers as well.

According to THIS LINK:

The Malaysian Insider had reported last week that the proposal to revamp BTN courses is part of initiatives being pushed by Datuk Seri Idris Jala and a task force set up to promote 1 Malaysia, Datuk Seri Najib Razak's concept announced when he took the top job on April 3.

1 Malaysia is one of several laboratories set up to push through ideas on Key Performance Index (KPI) and National Key Results Areas (NKRAs) that Najib knows will be the tipping point in the next general election.

His ruling BN coalition was badly beaten in Election 2008 under the leadership of former Prime Minister Tun Abdullah Ahmad Badawi when it lost four more states and 82 federal seats to give up its customary two-thirds parliamentary majority.

It was felt the BTN needed a complete makeover to promote inclusiveness.

Datuk Idris Jala and his wife were my varsity mates in USM. He was one year my senior and his wife (who was one year my junior) and I worked together in musical presentations. Even then, he stood out from all the others with his funky pony tail and more importantly, as one with much drive and the tenacity to succeed where few dared to tread. In fact, when we were members of an organization in USM, he struck me as one who did not conform to pressure and had no qualms whatsoever in being different as long as he remained true to himself and to God. My friends in Shell have nothing but praises for the legacy he left behind when he joined MAS. Today, I truly applaud his courage to put right what he deems to be wrong. How many would dare to move against the grain in such a move?

At least one person in high places is aware of the need to deliver the nation from further destruction via propaganda. It is absolutely necessary for the BTN to be completely revamped from without and within if this nation intends to move on and to be united. If we consider the report from Merdeka Centre, we must realize that it is the younger set that are more resistant to change than the older one who went through May 13 and many other challenges in the course of nation-building. Could that finding be the result of the propaganda from BTN?

As one who worked with youths for over 25 years of my life, my heart wept when I read that our DPM provided a stout defence of the BTN courses today, and asserted that the programmes promoted nationalism and unity.

If so, why then did Datuk Idris moot for change? Check THIS LINK for a summary of the module being taught at BTN.

A former BTN participant commented in The Malaysian Insider that the first song you learnt in the BTN course is ANAK KECIL MAIN API. I wonder about the connotations of that song. In objecting to Datuk Idris Jala's proposal, can this action be seen as one that supports the PM's pet project of 1Malaysia? Please read the many comments left by readers in The Malaysian Insider because they took umbrage to our DPM's statements and had no holds barred in speaking from their hearts.

I sincerely hope that Merdeka Centre can do a study on BTN graduates to assess whether it meets its official aims to ascertain whether or not political indoctrination is actually being carried out there as alleged by State Education, Higher Education and Human Capital Development Committee chairman Halimah Ali (picture) on Wednesday at THIS LINK. Once such an objective study is done, the results and testimonies of the respondents will provide the documented evidence of what really goes on there. In the mean time, I would encourage readers to voice their sentiments and to share their experiences at BTN.

Young people have impressionable minds and form images, stereotypes and concepts that remain with them for a long time. I believe it is the responsibility of the government to harness them for positive outcome and not to achieve their personal agenda, whatever that may be. Failure to do so is akin to setting a time bomb for our nation because by then, national unity will be nothing but a pipe dream if young people are made to see others according to the dictates of policy makers!

All that we can do now is to hope, dream and pray that indeed Datuk Idris Jala will be able to moot that change for the betterment of our nation with his proposal for a revamp of BTN. May all obstacles be cleared for his noble ambition for this nation.

FUNNY STUFF FROM ALL OVER

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 05:35:00 +0000

Have you seen funny signs that bring a smile or two to your face? Well, my dear friend, Freddie, sent me these a few days ago. Some are a real riot and will surely bring a smile or two to your face. He left for a three-week vacation in Europe together with a few other friends. I was invited to join them but the thought of being away from blogosphere is enough to give me a cardiac arrest so here I am, still staring at my laptop whilst the gang is in Amsterdam now for a few days before flying off to Germany and then Austria. My next post will be a socio-political one so stay tuned.Enjoy this selection... Have a nice day, dear reader!
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NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION.

Hotel bedroom--Japan:
GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIORS IN BED.

Doctor's surgery--Rome:
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Cocktail lounge--Norway:
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

Hotel--Acapulco:
THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED HERE.

Hotel air conditioner instructions--Japan:
COOLS AND HEATS: IF YOU WANT CONDITION OF WARM AIR IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF.

Zoo--Hungary:
PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY.

Restaurant--Nairobi:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

Car rental brochure--Tokyo:
WHEN PASSENGER OF FOOT HEAVE IN SIGHT, TOOTLE THE HORN. TRUMPET HIM MELODIOUSLY AT FIRST, BUT IF HE STILL OBSTACLES YOUR PASSAGE THEN TOOTLE HIM WITH VIGOUR.

River highway:
TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.

Men's lavatory--Japan:
ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP.

Restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.

Automatic hand dryer in public lavatory:
DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS.

Maternity ward:
NO CHILDREN ALLOWED.

Cemetery
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES

Restaurant menu--Switzerland:
OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

Bar--Tokyo:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Temple-- Bangkok:
IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER IF DRESSED AS A MAN.

Japanese public bath:
FOREIGN GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO PULL COCK IN TUB.

Hotel bedroom--Thailand:
PLEASE DO NOT BRING SOLICITORS INTO YOUR ROOM.

Hotel brochure--Italy:
THIS HOTEL IS RENOWNED FOR ITS PEACE AND SOLITUDE. IN FACT, CROWDS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD FLOCK HERE TO ENJOY ITS SOLITUDE.

Hotel bedroom-- Japan:
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel-- Yugoslavia:
THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel lobby-- Bucharest:
THE LIFT IS BEING FIXED FOR THE NEXT DAY. DURING THAT TIME WE REGRET THAT YOU WILL BE UNBEARABLE.

Supermarket-- Hong Kong:
FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE, WE RECOMMEND COURTEOUS, EFFICIENT SELF-SERVICE.

Hotel-- Moscow (opposite Russian Orthodox monastery):
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.

From the Soviet Weekly:
THERE WILL BE A MOSCOW EXHIBITION OF ARTS BY 15,000 SOVIET REPUBLIC PAINTERS AND SCULPTORS. THESE WERE EXECUTED OVER THE PAST TWO YEARS.

Newspaper, East Africa:
A NEW SWIMMING POOL IS RAPIDLY TAKING SHAPE SINCE THE CONTRACTORS HAVE THROWN IN THE BULK OF THEIR WORKERS.

Black Forest-- Germany:
IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Hotel-- Zurich:
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED

Laundry-- Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.

Advertisement for donkey rides-- Thailand:
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

Hotel bedroom-- Moscow:
IF THIS IS YOUR FIRST VISIT TO THE USSR, YOU ARE WELCOME TO IT.

Tourist agency--Czechoslovakia:
TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS. WE GUARANTEE NO MISCARRIAGES.

Dentist's advertisement-- Hong Kong:
TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS.

Airline-- Copenhagen:
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

Have a nice day, dear reader! Next socio-political post will up later.