masterwordsmith-unplugged

CAN YOU THINK OF OTHER WAYS TO SPEND RM 89K?

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 00:28:00 +0000

Did you know that a total of 973 tear gas canisters costing RM89,000 were used to disperse the anti-Internal Security Act (ISA) illegal demonstrations on August 1st this year? Are you surprised that such a large sum of money was used on innocent people who were expressing their sentiments about an archaic law?

The Malaysian Insider at THIS LINK reported:

Home Minister Datuk Seri Hishamuddin Tun Hussein said 663 policemen were deployed during the demonstrations while 442 were on standby at various locations around Kuala Lumpur.

He said 182 Federal Reserve Unit members were also tasked with dispersing the demonstrators, while 22 traffic police officers and members were assigned to control the traffic flow at the locations identified.

“There were also 187 members of uniformed bodies on duty because of the demonstrations on that day,” he said in his written reply to Teo Nie Ching (DAP-Serdang) in the Dewan Rakyat today.

Teo wanted to know the number of tear gas canisters fired during the anti-ISA demontrations and the cost incurred by the government, and the strength of the security forces and enforcement bodies involved in handling the demonstrations.

Let's do a bit of simple mathematics:

663 policemen were deployed
442 policemen on standby
182 FRU personnel were on duty
22 traffic police officers were on duty
187 members of uniformed bodies

TOTAL: 1496 persons were deployed to the scene.

If you can, do try to estimate:

a) the labour hours lost i.e. the opportunity cost of this move as these personnel could otherwise be fulfilling other tasks

b) the cost of labour for these personnel which could otherwise be directed to other expenditure for the betterment of the nation

c) the external cost to be born by this deployment e.g. the impact on the businesses in the areas concerned, granted that some gave ridiculously colossal figures

Resources used: 973 tear gas canisters costing RM89,000.

Perhaps the Home Minister can enlighten the rakyat:

a) why the peaceful demonstration necessitated the deployment of such a large number of personnel to the scene

b) the reason why tear gas was fired.

c) why women, children and teenagers were arrested

d) what is being done about the ISA review and when this will be made public.

To me, 89 000RM is a lot of money. Don't forget all the additional expenses as highlighted in my post AT THIS LINK.

As a Malaysian citizen, my heart bleeds when I look at what is happening in my country.

How do you feel, dear reader?

TAKE ME BACK TO THE SIXTIES

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 12:30:00 +0000

As many of you know, I am a baby-boomer born in the 1960's. I loved my childhood and I grew up with Cliff Richard, The Beatles, Elvis, Nat King Cole, The Black and White Minstrel Show, Andy Williams, Flintstones, Bee Gees and many other unforgettable artistes and movies.

At every family gathering, I let my hair down with my cousins and we would gyrate our hips and do the Twist or the a-go-go dances with our heads shaking to the left and right, hands moving up and down in a most rhythmic fashion. Such glorious days!

I remember how as a four year-old I was singing "Yellow Submarine" this way:

eee ol ladeee yellow submarine instead of We all live in a yellow submarine!!!

It was when I learnt how to read that I realized what utter nonsense I had been crooning and the best part was - everyone sang the same mumbo jumbo.

More importantly, I was so young when May 13, 1969 happened. The only thing I remember was my mom coming to school to take me home and how I rejoiced because all the cousins were at home and we made such a racket until we heard the sirens and saw the truckloads of soldiers in front of my grandmother's house. Silence. Then we knew what it was all about and our hearts were filled with fear. Such innocence gone in the twinkling of an eye.

After the storm, I remember how we were all so patriotic and sang "Berjaya" and "Negara-ku" with so much gusto and the schools and media pumped us with so much propoganda.

Fast forward forty years later. We may be more developed but are we really one nation now? I cannot believe that this nation has grown 40 years older but we seem to be more backward in mentality than what we were then back in the 1960's.

My uncle was Tunku Abdul Rahman's very close friend and I remember how I was filled with so much awe and respect when I went to his home as a young girl. His presence seemed to fill the whole room and his calm and serene demeanour complimented his princely air and yet, there was this humane and humble note about him. Great men have such characteristics indeed. I still have the handwritten testimonial that Tunku wrote for me in 1983 - a real treasure indeed.

I believe that what made the sixties special was not so much the music or movies or that black and white television was introduced. It was because then - we had a Prime Minister who truly loved the people. He was a Prince and yet so much a man who could relate to the rakyat, a leader who led without imposing on others, a politician who exuded integrity and fairness in all that he said and wrote. It was truly leadership by example and he commanded the respect of the masses.

Did you know that in 1977, having acquired substantial shares in The Star, a Penang-based newspaper, Tunku Abdul Rahman became the newspaper's Chairman? His columns, "Looking Back" and "As I See It", were critical of the government. In 1987, we all know The Star was banned by a certain leader.

I doubt we can ever have a leader like Tunku Abdul Rahman...Of course I hope that there will rise from amongst us one with his wisdom, stature and perspective ...Is that idealistic me speaking?

The 60's and 70's ...such wondrous years for Malaysia....

Anyway, if you want a more international flashback of the 60's, please click on THIS LINK which Angela sent me today. It will take you down memory lane and give you a summary of important events, music and icons.

I will be changing the template of this blog soon. I hope that my dear readers will not react negatively to the new template. The truth is, I am quite sick of the sweet pink template with hearts which does not really gel with the content that I post these days.

So this is advance warning that this pink template will change into something else soon.:-)

Please bear with me and stay with me, dear reader. Thanks!

Here's wishing you a lovely evening!

MIDDAY MADNESS (JOKES)

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 03:15:00 +0000

Cinderella was now 75 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now dead Prince, she happily sat upon her rocking chair, watching the world go by from her front porch, with a cat called Alan for companionship.

One sunny afternoon, out of nowhere, appeared the Fairy Godmother.

Cinderella said "Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all these years?"

The Fairy Godmother replied "Well Cinderella, since you have lived a good, wholesome life since we last met, I have decided to grant you 3 wishes. Is there anything for which your heart still yearns?"

Cinderella is taken aback, overjoyed and after some thoughtful consideration and almost under her breath she uttered her first wish: "I wish I was wealthy beyond comprehension."

Instantly, her rocking chair was turned into solid gold. Cinderella was stunned. Alan, her old faithful cat, jumped off her lap and scampered to the edge of the porch, quivering with fear.

Cinderella said "Oh thank you, Fairy Godmother".

The Fairy Godmother replied "It is the least I can do. What does your heart wish for your second wish?"

Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said: "I wish I was young and full of the beauty of youth again".

At once, her wish having been desired, became reality, and her beautiful youthful visage had returned. Cinderella felt stirrings inside her that had been dormant for years and long forgotten vigor and vitality began to course through her very soul.

Then the Fairy Godmother again spoke "You have one more wish, what shall you have?"

Cinderella looked over to the frightened cat in the corner and said: "I wish you to transform Alan my old cat into a beautiful and handsome young man".

Magically, Alan suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his biological make-up, that when complete he stood before her, a boy, so beautiful the like of which she nor the world had ever seen, so fair indeed that birds begun to fall from the sky at his feet.

The Fairy Godmother again spoke: "Congratulations, Cinderella. Enjoy your new life." And, with a blazing shock of bright blue electricity, she was gone.

For a few eerie moments, Alan and Cinderella looked into each other's eyes. Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most stunningly perfect boy she had ever seen.

Then Alan walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her rocking chair, and held her close in his young muscular arms.

He moved close to her ear, and into her ear breathed as much as whispered, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath, "I bet you regret having me neutered now, don't you?"

___________________________________________

Bill's all excited about his new rifle. So, he goes bear hunting in Alaska. The first bear he sees is a little brown bear, and he kills it with his first shot. There is a tap on his shoulder, and he turns around to see a big black bear.

The black bear says "You've got 2 choices. One, I maul you to death or Two, we have sex."

Bill bends over for the bear. He's sore for 2 days, but he recovers and vows revenge.

Bill heads out on another trip to Alaska and he finds the black bear and kills him. At that moment there is a tap on his shoulder. A huge grizzly is standing right behind him.

The grizzly says, "That was a big mistake. You've got 2 choices, "Either I maul you to death or we have sex."

Bill bends over. He survives, but he's really hurting and takes quite a bit of time to recover, and, he's outraged. Sure enough, he heads back to Alaska and finds the grizzly and shoots him at point blank range.

There's a tap on his shoulder. He turns around to find an enormous polar bear, and the polar bear says, "You don't really come here for the hunting, do you?"
___________________

A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at Burger King. He noticed that they ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries. One for him, one for her, until each had half of them.

Then he poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup, and set it in front of his wife. The old man began to eat, and his wife sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap.

The young man decided to ask if they would allow him to purchase another meal for them so that they didn't have to split theirs.

The old gentleman said, "Oh, no. We've been married 50 years, and everything has always been and will always be shared, 50/50."

The young man than asked the wife if she was going to eat, and she replied, "Not yet. It's his turn using the teeth."

_________________________
Goodbye Mother

A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him.

"Pardon me," she said, "I'm sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It's just that you look just like my son, who just died recently."

"I'm very sorry," replied the young man, "is there anything I can do for you?"

"Yes," she said, "As I'm leaving, can you say 'Good bye, Mother'? It would make me feel so much better."

"Sure," answered the young man.

As the old woman was leaving, he called out, "Goodbye, Mother!" As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he saw that his total was £127.50.

"How can that be?" He asked, "I only purchased a few things!"

"Your mother said that you would pay for her," said the clerk.

________________________________

All The Thanks I Need

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned.

The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny, so the husband offered to donate some of his own skin.

However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!

One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice. She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."

"My darling," he replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
________________________________________

Have a lovely day!!

A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY INDEED

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 17:15:00 +0000

Newly launched Free Malaysia Today carried an article on PKR won't lose sleep over RPK's warning which reinforced my suspicion that this party is heading for troubled waters.

I find it absolutely ridiculous for Parti Keadilan Rakyat (PKR) strategy director Chua Tian Chang to oversimplify things and claim that "Pakatan Rakyat (PR) assemblymen in Selangor should just focus on raising their performance and the people’s standard of living, and not be too distracted by Raja Petra Kamarudin’s warning that the state government could be toppled by Barisan Nasional (BN) next January."

Honestly, I expect a Strategy Director of any political party to exhibit sharp thinking skills and prowess in strategy to counter any real or imagined threat to a party but such a light-hearted response to a very real warning from Raja Petra Kamarudin reveals Tian Chua's deficiency in combat skills to play the game of politics!

His argument that "UMNO chief Najib Razak and other BN leaders had always had it in them to abuse their powers–like using the ISA or MACC–to frustrate the opposition" reflects his immaturity in his understanding of key issues at hand.

To add insult to injury would be Tian Chua's lackadaisical statements :

“But I won’t want to spend more than a minute over such a possibility,” he said.

“PKR wakil rakyat need to concentrate on doing our job, that is, governing Selangor well,” was Tian’s central message in responding to Raja Petra, also known as RPK.

I wonder if Tian Chua actually read the article at all. The fact that he even refused to spend more than SIXTY SECONDS over the possibility shows his lack of respect for a highly seasoned, experienced and most respected icon in blogosphere who has such a large following of readers who love Malaysia.

In his Nov. 3 posting “Will Selangor Fall in January,” RPK had said that he warned PR leader Anwar Ibrahim that Perak would fall, and it did two weeks afterwards. Is this not enough proof to Tian Chua that RPK knows his stuff whilst he himself is resting in blissful ignorance and idealism that all is well as long as PKR improve their delivery of services?

Can you imagine how other readers would react to Tian Chua's arrogant and high-handed response to a very passionate post written by someone who has nothing but the welfare of the country in his heart, someone who has paid a very heavy price for his stand oh issues to the extent that he and his family have had to leave the country in a self-imposed exile? Would Tian Chua be ready to stick his neck out the way RPK has done for Malaysia?

Those of us who read Malaysia Today and many other news portals or blogs are well aware of the goings-on in PKR. Almost daily we read of absurd statements that reflect irrational thinking and rash claims that are made to protect oneself and to dent the party image. A good example would be the Zulkifli-Sivarasa spat which you can read over HERE and Anwar's reaction to that spectacle OVER HERE.

Is governance of the state which is akin to the crown jewels as simple as what he claims?

He said the PR government’s job was to improve on the state’s delivery of services to the people and implementing more welfare programmes for the needy.

Tian stressed that party members and supporters must not be distracted by unnecessary worries but focus on building up the party by doing the right and important things.

Yea right! We were all born yesterday without the ability to read, think and analyze. How do you expect us to react when we read disconcerting reports about members of PR such as over HERE?

Most foolishly, Tian Chua claims that “At the end of the day, the voters will decide in elections, which must be held even after a state government has been overthrown; so the final power is still in the hands of the electorate.”

He is totally resting on his laurels and viewing Selangor through PKR-tinted lenses so to speak. Does he not know that even though the rakyat have power vai the polling box, at the end of the day, we have to see who is really running Selangor - PKR or UMNO.

Indeed Tian Chua is enjoying a false sense of security because PR ’s control of the Selangor State Assembly does not mean that it is in control of the state government. Blind idealism and delusional thinking are strong forces that can undermine any political party.

The following is extracted from Will Selangor Fall in January?

“Many within the Selangor state agencies and government departments are Umno loyalists. They were in fact placed there and promoted because of their links with Umno. So, while Pakatan Rakyat may control the top, it will never be able to control the bottom. …

“And the first thing that Khir Toyo did when Selangor fell to the opposition (other than to shred all the evidence of wrongdoing) was to instruct the Selangor state agencies and government departments to sabotage the Pakatan Rakyat government. And this is what they are doing, every day of the week. Thus the ‘funny things’ that are happening in Selangor, including the beer issue and the arrest of the ex-Perlis Mufti and the temple demolitions and what not.”

If Tian Chua's statement/reaction is a representative of many leaders within PR, then it is a clear indication that their confidence and complacence will be their undoing!

Is he out of his mind? His own case for biting the policeman is enough evidence that trouble is brewing in the cauldron of deceitful plots to bring down the Selangor government. Why can't he be gracious enough to accept the warnings from a seasoned and experienced political activist and take the necessary steps to ward off any potential attack from the other side?

Perhaps he is living in another realm of existence.

Judging from his pompous statement, reinforcing the home base is the last thing on his mind and I am sure the enemy is clapping gleefully that there exists one character like Tian Chua in the enemy camp who is preparing the way for their assault with his sheer ignorance and arrogance!!!

The Pakatan Rakyat government in Selangor needs to take the warnings most seriously and take immediate action to consolidate their position. This should include:

* Cold storage of all unfriendly PR officials, best to fire some. Set an example. Let these officials cry all the way to UMNO and let real people serve Selangor., not robotic retards that move to the rhythm of UMNO warlords.

* State government department heads must be replaced with PR friendly civil servants. to ensure that moles cannot instigate disloyalty.

* Get all component parties together to think hard on how to counteract BN and to sniff out their traps.

* Moles must be trapped and eradicated

* Display unity in their stand on issues instead of all the intra-fighting for powers

* Prepare a fool-proof game plan to fight BN on the uneven playing field

* Go on the offensive. The best form of defense is attack!

If PR does not want to see the Perak debacle occurring in Selangor, Tian Chua had better read that article carefully and consolidate his position and that of PR. If they continue to fight amongst themselves, then they had better prepare to surrender the seat of power to BN!

So what we have before us is a plausible warning from RPK and indifference to the warning from a young upstart who is supposedly a Strategy Director. What strategy? Strategy for the road to destruction?

Wake up from your false sense of security and be complacent no more! Take heed to the warnings lest you grovel in shame. By then it will be too late!!!

Act now to consolidate your position or regret at your leisure!!!

TIME TO UNWIND WITH SOME HUMOR

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 09:12:00 +0000

One day there was a man who was walking through the forest and got lost. He wandered around for over a week, and was beginning to starve. He spotted a Bald Eagle who had just caught a fish and chased it, hoping to get it to drop the fish so he could eat it. Then he saw the bird land on a tree stump not far from him, so he picked up a stone to toss at it--hoping the bird would be frightened and fly away without the fish. But, weak as he was, his aim was off and he hit the poor bird square on the head, and killing it.

"Well," he thought to himself, "no sense letting it go to waste, if I leave it here it will just rot, and it could save my life if I eat it."

So, he built himself a little fire--using a couple of stones and cooked the eagle to eat. While it was cooking a ranger stumbled upon the man, and when he saw what he was up to, he immediately arrested him--because as you know, that is quite illegal!

The man told the ranger what had happened, and asked for a trial so he could explain the situation to a judge.

So, the day of his trial he told the judge, "Please your Honor, it was a life or death situation! I was lost and starving, and I didn't mean to harm the bird--I only wanted the fish! And when I accidentally killed it, well, I felt terrible but couldn't see any reason to let it go to waste!"

The judge listened to the man's story and deemed him, "Not guilty, on the grounds of extenuating circumstances."

The man was very grateful, and thanked the judge for his fairness.

Then, the judge leaned over and quietly asked the man, "Just between you and me, what DOES a Bald Eagle taste like anyway??"

The man comtemplated this for a moment and then spoke, "Well, it's kind of hard to explain... but, I would say somewhere between a California Condor and a Spotted Owl."

________________________________________

Three women were in a bar talking about their husbands and how they made love. The first woman said, "My husband is a psychologist, and before we make love, he brings me flowers and candy. I like that."

The second woman proclaimed, "My husband is a mechanic, he makes love a little rough, but really tunes my engine; I like that!"

The third woman replied, "Well my husband works for Microsoft and all he does is sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how good it's going to be, when I finally get it..."

____________________________________

You may be a geek if....

You've ever used a computer on Friday, Saturday and Sunday of the same weekend.

You find yourself interrupting computer store salesman to correct something he said.

The first thing you notice when walking in a business is their computer system and offer advice on how you would change it.

You've ever mounted a magnetic tape reel.

You own any shareware.

You know more IP addresses than phone numbers.

You've ever accidentally dialed an IP address.

Your friends use you as tech support.

You've ever named a computer.

You have your local computer store on speed dial.

You can't carry on a conversation without talking about computers.

Co-workers have to E-mail you about the fire alarm to get you out of the building.

You've ever found "stray" diskettes when doing laundry.

Your computer has it's own phone line - but your teenager doesn't.

You check the national weather service web page for current weather conditions (rather than look out the window).

You know more URLs than street addresses.

Your pet has a web page.

You get really excited when Yahoo adds your link.

_______________________________________-

Be Sure You Know The Subject Matter

The male teacher in a girls' school asked the science class: "Who can tell me what organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated? Mary, can you tell me?"

Mary blushed furiously as she stood up. She said: "Sir, how dare you ask such a question? I will complain to my parents, who will complain to the principal."

The male teacher was taken aback at first by Mary's reaction. Then, as understanding dawned on him, he called for another pupil, this time a volunteer.

Lily put up her hand. "Yes, Lily?"

"Sir, the correct answer is the iris of the eye."

"Very good. Thanks, Lily," said the male teacher. He then turned to the first girl, who threatened to complain to her parents and principal: "Well, Mary, I have three things to tell you: First, you have NOT done your homework. Second, you have a DIRTY mind. And thirdly, I fear, one day, you are going to be sadly disappointed."

___________________________________

Heavenly Transportation

Three men die and go to heaven. At the gate St. Peter tells them, "Before you go into heaven, we are going to give you each a vehicle with which to get around. The way we determine what type of vehicle you will get is by how faithful you were to your wives. Now," he says, turning to the first man, "were you true to your wife?"

Yes, I was, St. Peter," says the first man. "I never strayed. From the day I married her to the day I died, I slept with no woman other than my wife. I loved her very deeply."

"As reward for your complete fidelity," says St. Peter, "I now give you these keys to a beautiful Roll-Royce."

The man happily accepts the keys, and St. Peter turns to the second man. "Sir," he says, "were you faithful to you wife?"

"Well, St. Peter," says the second man a little shyly, "I must admit that when I was much younger, I did stray once or twice. But I did love my wife very much, and after those minor indiscretions, I was completely faithful until my dying day."

St. Peter looks down at the man and says, "As a reward for good marital conduct, I am giving you these keys to a Pontiac."

As the man takes the keys from him St. Peter turns to the third man. "Sir," he says, "were you faithful to you wife?"

"St. Peter," says the man, "I screwed everything I could, every chance I got. There wasn't a week of my marriage that I didn't sleep with someone other than, wife. But I must admit to you, St. Peter, that it was a problem I had, because I really did love my wife very much."

"Well," says St. Peter, "we do know that you did love your wife and that does count for something, so this is what you get." With that he rolls out a ten-speed bicycle and gives it to the man.

The gates of heaven open, and the three men enter.

Some time later the man on the bicycle is riding along, when he sees that the man with the Rolls Royce has pulled over and is sitting on the bumper of his car. He is sobbing uncontrollably.

The man pulls his bicycle up next to the car and says, "Hey, pal, what's the matter? What could possibly be wrong? You have a beautiful Rolls Royce to drive around in?"

"I know," says the man through his sobs, "but I just saw my wife on roller skates!"

____________________________________

Washing The Dog

A young boy, about eight years old, was at the corner "Mom & Pop" grocery picking out a pretty good size box of laundry detergent.

The grocer walked over, and, trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do.

"Oh, no laundry," the boy said, "I'm going to wash my dog."

"But you shouldn't use this to wash your dog. It's very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he'll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him."

But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog.

About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing.

"Oh, he died," the boy said.

The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was sorry the dog died but added, "I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog."

"Well," the boy replied, "I don't think it was the detergent that killed him."

"Oh? What was it then?"

"I think it was the spin cycle!"

__________________________

Have a lovely evening, dear reader!

HONESTLY, DO THEY EXPECT US TO TRUST THEM?

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 02:30:00 +0000

When I look at children these days, I wonder what happened to the beautiful process of growing up and enjoying one's childhood. Those formative years seem to be dotted with pressure to conform at the expense of the development of creativity and zest for life .The element of humanity seems to be missing. Could this be the reason why many citizens today have such a cold regard for the betterment of our nation? More importantly, is this why we have before us a generation of leaders who do not have the welfare of the nation or the citizens in their hearts?

I often wonder how a nation that had so much potential can wither away to where we are today. So often, we tend to look at others with so much suspicion and doubt. What led to such a scenario? Trust should be present instead of suspicion but alas, it has to be earned. It is not easy to build trust. Whatever trust has been developed in the past can be shattered easily with just one error.

Where the nation is concerned, many citizens have been vocal in expressing their desire for justice, integrity and transparency in governance but these cries have fallen on deaf ears and the status quo seems to be more bent on achieving their evil agenda to deprive citizens of what is rightfully theirs.

In such a situation, can there be trust?

On one hand some declare their desire to serve the rakyat but go about doing the exact opposite. Then there are those who engage professionals to expertly craft their media messages or campaigns which they regurgitate happily at official functions BUT when they speak off the cuff, nothing but farcical and fallacious statements are spat from their mouths.

So how do you expect the rakyat like us to feel?

Do they really think we are so dumb as not to have the ability to put two and two together to see the hypocrisy and the inconsistency of the statements? Granted that some of them have their neurons centred on deceit and other devious schemes to plunder and re-direct what rightfully belongs to the citizens to other accounts.

What about the Opposition? Do they have much to offer?

I am a very fair and objective person. Whilst I may lambaste the status quo, I am also aware of the shortcomings of the other side. No one is perfect in this world, including myself. BUT, there is one thing that the Opposition must realize - their public relations strategy is totally a washout to say the least.

On one hand, we see how some can spend RM20million to boost their public image and international repute or the little that is left of it. On the other hand, we see how representatives from component parties of PR do not think before they speak and spew statements that dent the already heavily dented armour of the Opposition.

What are some of the issues that Pakatan Rakyat leaders have to realize?

1. Do not wash dirty linen in public to earn the rakyat's trust and confidence in the party.

Party unity and cohesiveness are vital to earn the trust of supporters. Identifying areas of weakness within and lambasting guilty ones in public do nothing for its public image! For instance, a cry to shape up or ship out may come from a sincere heart to reinforce areas of weakness BUT can't this message be communicated in such a way that puts the Opposition side in a more positive light? At the same time, the antics and independent statements of some quarters and the reaction of the leaders to these have undermined the credibility of the Opposition front. They must act to reinforce areas of weakness lest they disintegrate from an impending implosion.

A lot would depend on their public relations/media strategist for them to vet the messages and to ensure that the message is communicated via the right medium/channel to effect the correct response from the target audience. As it is, I think the negative effects of their statements have outnumbered positive effects, if any.

2. Slow responses to attacks from the other camp does not mean resilience. It only shows that the victim of such attacks is contributing to the lack of damage control.

A good example would be the Kampung Buah Pala issue. There have been so many attacks on the Penang Opposition government which have dented their image and to the extent that many have a negative perspective of the issue/opposition. Lies have to be put to the test. If there are certain quarters who persist in spewing these lies, the Opposition government must immediately respond with media statements as a damage control measure.

Silence or indifference does not mean that one is innocent. Neither does it show the resilience of the victim of such attacks. To the public, it could mean that they are silent because they are guilty.

As a mass communications undergraduate, I was blessed with excellent lecturers who emphasized the importance of dealing with crisis messages or damage control. As a lecturer in business communication, journalism and other writing courses years ago, I passed on this message when I trained my students to formulate the right response in good news/bad news situations. And now, as a concerned citizen, I am appealing to the Opposition to pull up their socks and think before they speak lest they lose ground support.

I have seen the media statements from some quarters and to me, it is all but rhetoric which saddens me deeply.

Words carry no meaning per se because it is the receiver of the message who give meaning to the words - that is a basic principle that I impart to my students in the first few lectures of my courses. It is sad that some quarters think that just because they say something, their audience will swallow whatever they communicate to them.

What utter nonsense!

In communication theory, the meaning of any message is in the person and not in the words. We are the ones who give meaning to the message according to our frames of reference, past experiences, prejudices, expectations and so on. Thus, it is time these leaders think about the rakyat before they open their mouths to speak!

Apart from that, we must remember that a literate person would exercise selective exposure and selective retention of messages. For instance, I choose what I want to read and I decide what to remember. There could be thousands of messages out there but it is up to me to expose myself to those messages just as you, dear reader, chose to read my humble blog.

3. Pakatan Rakyat need better PR (public relations) strategy.

I strongly believe that the time has come for Pakatan Rakyat to concentrate on damage control because they are resting too much on their laurels. Please do not think that the citizens will always support you. They will continue to give you their support IF you continue to show that:

* you are serious in offering a better alternative to the present regime

* you are carefully selecting and training better leaders to take over

* you have a blue-print for national development which is beyond mere rhetoric

* you are capable of dealing with the attacks from the other side because you have a system that is impenetrable.

Dear reader, my heart is deeply saddened when I see the developments in our country. I love my country as I am sure you do and I am sure you would want to see a better environment than what we have today.

The fact is this. If we want to see a better country, we need better leaders. If we want better leaders, we need quality in Malaysians which can only come about if there is serious reform in education policies and many other areas and that can only come about if there is a new government in place because if status quo is maintained, I am quite certain you all know what may happen to us.

So what do we do then as citizens?

EXERT PRESSURE.

We need to pressure our elected representatives - ADUNs and Members of Parliament to perform and to fulfil their moral obligation to us and to keep their promises. Ultimately, the time has come for us to take a more active role in our country. If we fail to do so, rot which has already set in will beget maggots and can you imagine what will happen then?

I sincerely hope that there will come a time when we can place our complete trust in our government that can walk the talk, practice what it preaches and govern this country justly with transparency, accountability and stability. I pray for the time when we can see quality leaders standing for elections - people whom we can look up to, respect and vote for confidently with no doubts or feelings of suspicion.

Does such a situation exist now? So can they blame the rakyat when they are filled with suspicion?

Honestly, do they expect us to trust them?

----------------------------------------------------------------

To my regular readers, my deepest apologies for not posting as much as I normally do. The reason is because I am still unwell and my head is spinning due to vertigo. Please pardon the lack of unity/flow of ideas in this post. I had wanted to write about this since Sunday but could only do so today. Thanks for your patience with me. Have a good day.

POLITICS EXPLAINED AND OTHER JOKES

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 03:00:00 +0000

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. Your Mom, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,"

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said.

Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room.

Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I Understand the concept of politics now." The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about." The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."

---------------------------------------------

Einstein dies and goes to heaven. Saint Peter says, "You look like Einstein, but you have no idea the lengths some people will go to, to sneak in. Can you prove who you really are?" Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?"

Saint Peter snaps his fingers and a blackboard and chalk instantly appear. Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his theory of relativity. Saint Peter is suitably impressed. "You really are Einstein! Welcome to Heaven!"

The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again Saint Peter asks for his credentials. Picasso asks, "Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?" Saint Peter says, "Go ahead." Picasso erases Einstein's equations and sketches a truly stunning mural with just a few strokes of chalk. Saint Peter claps. "Surely you are the great artist you claim to be! Come on in!"

Then Saint Peter looks up and sees George W. Bush. Saint Peter scratches his head and says, "Einstein and Picasso both managed to prove their identity. How can you prove yours?" George W looks bewildered and says, "Who are Einstein and Picasso?" Saint Peter sighs, "Come on in, George."

-----------------------------

Bill Clinton is visiting a school. In one class, he asks the students if anyone can give him an example of a "tragedy." One little boy stands up and offers that, "If my best friend who lives next door is playing in the street when a car came by and killed him, that would be a tragedy."

"No," Clinton says, "That would be an ACCIDENT."

A girl raises her hand. "If a school bus carrying fifty children drove off a cliff, killing everyone inside...that would be a tragedy."

"I'm afraid not," explains Clinton. "That is what we would call a GREAT LOSS."

The room is silent; none of the other children dare volunteer.

"What?" asks Clinton, "Isn't there anyone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally a boy in the back raises his hand. In a timid voice, he says: "If an airplane carrying Bill and Hillary Clinton was blown up by a bomb, *that* would be a tragedy."

"Wonderful!" Clinton beams. "Marvelous! And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?"

"Well," says the boy, "because it wouldn't be an accident, and it certainly would be no great loss!"

---------------------------------------------

This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida... and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!

NAME: Greg Bulmash

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries.

-----------------------------------------

One day, Mr. Phillard rushed his pregnant wife over to the hospital. As the doctors were prepping his wife, Mr. Phillard's idiot brother Bill arrived to watch the birth. But when Mr. Phillard saw the blood and everything else, he fainted. When Mr. Phillard woke up he was in a bed with the doctor standing above him.

"Mr. Phillard," the doctor said, "you are in the recovery room. Don't worry, your wife is fine and she had twins, a boy and a girl. Because you were unconscious and your wife was still under anaesthesia, she requested that your brother Bill name the kids."

"What! My brother, the idiot! I can't believe you let him! What did he name them?"

"He named your daughter Denise."

"Hey, not bad! I underestimated my brother. What did he name my son?"

"He named your son Denephew."

--------------------------------------------------

A lady approaches her priest and says, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

"What do they say?" the priest inquires.

"They only know how to say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Want to have some fun?'"

"That's terrible," the priest exclaims, "but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house, and I will put them with my two male talking parrots whom I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to praise and worship."

"Thank you!" the woman responds.

The next day, the woman brings her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her two female parrots in with the male parrots, and the female parrots say, "Hi, we're prostitutes, want to have some fun?"

One male parrot looks at the other male parrot and exclaims, "Put the beads away. Our prayers have been answered!"

---------------------------------------

Have a nice day!!

THIS IS IT!!!

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 19:26:00 +0000

Have you watched Michael Jackson's "THIS IS IT" yet? If you have not, please book your tickets asap. I watched it tonight and savored every single nanosecond of this movie. This awesome and mind-blowing film shows us that even at 50 years of age and despite suffering from arthritis and prescription drugs, Michael Jackson could move like no one else on earth and put on the kind of show that befits his title of King of Pop. I am so bowled over by the music, the powerful choreography and terrific music that bears testimony to Jackson’s singular genius and ability to entertain people of all backgrounds and ages. Truly, none can ever come close to being compared to even his shadow.

His gentleness, creative talent that is par excellence, zeal for perfection in the way he orchestrated his rehearsals and desire to please his fans, not forgetting his marvelous professionalism in which he handled the people involved in the rehearsals must never be forgotten. Tragically, his sold-out concerts never came to pass because of his untimely death.

Michael Jackson's THIS IS IT is the documentary that chronicles the intense rehearsals of his 50 London-based concerts that failed to take place due to the his drug-induced death in June. It gives Jackson fans and music lovers worldwide a rare, behind-the-scenes look at the performer to enjoy how he developed, created and rehearsed for his sold-out concerts that would have taken place beginning this summer in London's O2 Arena.

The film is produced with the full support of the Estate of Michael Jackson and is made from efforts to put together more than one hundred hours of behind-the-scenes footage, featuring Jackson rehearsing a number of his songs for the show from April through June, 2009.

In raw and candid detail, THIS IS IT captures the singer, dancer, filmmaker, architect, creative genius and great artist at work as he creates and perfects his final show with Kenny Ortega, Michael Jackson's creative partner and the director of the stage show which is produced by Randy Phillips, Kenny Ortega and Paul Gongaware.

The film opens with a footage of the backup dancers bursting into tears as they describe their hopes for working with Michael Jackson, but eventually it becomes clear that it was a mentorship as much as a work environment on that stage. His instructions to the dancers and musicians, while soft-spoken and polite, are regarded as though they are instructions from heaven above! The adulation from the crew is utterly inspiring!

The film is special to me because I learnt how MJ pays so much attention to minute details showing sensitivity to music, his art, the feelings of his supporting team and a deep love for the environment as well. The exchanges in the movie between various quarters revealed a lot not only about MJ but also the kind of people he was working with - all of whom had the highest respect for this music icon that none can ever hope to emulate.

During one of the interviews where the principal dancers are being selected, the guy in charge reminded them that they were to be 'the extensions of Michael Jackson" and truly, they met expectations even when the real spectacle is MJ front and center. The rough camera angles and bare stage are fascinating even though MJ looked very gaunt and thin in this movie. The elegance, fluidity in motion and superb dancing skills displayed by MJ are echoed beautifully by the back-up dancers, usually in glorious high-def. I enjoyed the subtle shoulder movements in "Human Nature" and my feet were tapping to "Billie Jean" not forgetting his beautiful vocals and expressiveness in the slow numbers. However, I must admit that his voice was not as good as when he was younger.

I really love the way MJ spoke so gently even though he's in control of pretty much everything,at times having minor tiffs with director Kenny Ortega about timing and asking the band to hold off on their next cue, to give time to "let him sizzle." The dancers and back-up vocals are simply astounding!!!

Click on THIS LINK to enjoy this clip of the theme song and the magnificent guitar work of 24 year old Orianthi Paranganis whom many regard as the other star of THIS IS IT. This Greek-Australian virtuoso guitarist has blonde hair blowing in the fans and fingers blazing on the frets of the guitar burning up the stage next to the entertainment legend.

There are a few unfamiliar numbers such as "Earth Song," and the fantastic military exercise known as "The Drill" and the old I Want You Back". MJ gave a soulful rendition of "I'll Be There," that seemed so perfect and heartfelt. Another sequence that I love is the new film footage shot to introduce "Thriller". At certain parts, it feels overly slick until the dancers arrive onstage in zombie regalia to join Michael in the iconic dance - most powerful indeed. His synchronized and well-timed movements are superb and I really marvel at the energy that he displayed.

Most significantly, Jackson's death is wisely never mentioned in the film at all and it is as though the producer wanted the audience to remember him like this. With Ortega becoming his own character in the film, and a final scene of the entire crew in the prayer circle almost as if they are worshipping MJ as a demi-God, this is first-class artistic collaboration that is simply unbelievable!!!

The usual hits such as S mooth Criminal, Billie Jean, Beat It, Black or White, Thriller and so on reminded me of those days when I used to go for jazz dance classes and how difficult it was for me to follow the dance sequences that the instructor tried to teach me. As such, I can appreciate the amount of effort that these dancers put in for their performances. These dancers simply oozed with sensuality, style and showmanship. It reminded me of those days at night-spots such as Borsalino, Cinta, Hippodrome, Carmen Inn etc - days gone by in my youth when grooving to the beat was so easy. Then, clubbing mainly centered on dances unlike today. Alas, at my age, albeit younger than MJ, I don't think I can ever moonwalk no matter how hard I try!!!

The following is one of my favorite songs clips from the movie:

When you are watching the movie, please stay remain seated until after the credits of the movie as there are some surprises at the end. For MJ fans, I have to admit that THIS IS IT represents an unforgettable and honest account of a life that was cut far too short, a life that has made the difference to the lives of many others. This isn't Michael Jackson at his best but rather Michael Jackson showing the world he is the best and what is the best! You must watch it! Believe me - you won't regret it.

THE FOUR WAY TEST

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 03:45:00 +0000

The following is an inspirational story which I found in the net (Author Unknown). I am posting it as an inspirational piece to all who aspire greatness in your life be it at work, in the family, in the political arena or in your social circles. Have a nice day!

-----------------------------------------

The man was Herbert J. Taylor who surveyed the way the company did it's business, which was the sale of aluminum pots and pans. The nature of the industry was fraught with unethical business practices. To bring the business out of bankruptcy Taylor knew that he had to change the way business was conducted. Ultimately he developed a very simple business philosophy that all employees were to follow in all of their business dealings with customers, suppliers and associates. The philosophy changed the business, turned the business around and ultimately brought it out of bankruptcy.

The business philosophy is a simple four step decision making tool. It didn't tell people what to do or how to think, but it did give them a tool to use in all of their business dealings. The tool is now well known to anyone that has ever associated themselves with Rotary International. It is simple The Four Way Test. The tip is to use this simple decision making tool in your life and see if it doesn't make a difference. As people, we must all stand by our personal honesty and integrity. This is a handy and simple test of what you say, do or think. Give it a try in your life.

The Four Way Test

1. Is it the TRUTH?

2. Is it FAIR to all concerned?

3. Will it build GOODWILL and better friendships?

4. Will it be BENEFICIAL to all concerned?

By the way, this tool made Herbert Taylor a multimillionaire in the 1930s. So it's also a very profitable way of doing business.

-Author Unknown-
-------------------------------------

And may I add...a very good lesson for all politicians. Have a nice day!

WHY EVERYONE MUST VOTE AT THE NEXT GENERAL ELECTION

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 21:30:00 +0000

Sometimes we take life for granted..sometimes we even take voting for granted. Do you know that voting is vital for a democratic country?

Imagine this conversation:

“The Government is useless, there is nothing they can do to make our lives better. The rising prices, the unemployment, the escalating crime rate etc. they have no answers”, said Ah Meng.

“Well, if you are really concerned about all these things, you should have voted, Ah Meng!”, said Joven. “Maybe a better candidate would have won, and may be he would have taken some effective measures for improvement…Unless you vote you cannot blame the government!”

Well if you are one of those people who think voting is a waste of time but keep on complaining about how our government is a complete failure; then it is time you realize the importance of voting. Do your bit towards enhancing the governmen! Here are some reasons why people should vote…

1. Vote in an election for a state councillors, ADUNs, Members of Parliament etc because they have the rights to formulate policies that will affect :

* your children and descendants,your loved ones and friends
* your job
* your taxes
* your town
* your country
* your entire life

2. Voting gives you the right to choose the leader that YOU want

3. People elected set the educational policies which in turn shape the future of children and the nation.

4. Elected representatives have the power to decide most vital issues in our life. Health care, highways, jobs, taxes or even food.

5. So would you be comfortable in letting “anybody” take over these powers?

6. Voting is necessary for a healthy democracy.

7. If you are a registered voter, exercise your right to opinion. Your right to vote is your right to expression and opinion. Do not take your right for granted.

Take leave to go back to your hometown no matter how inconvenient. Try and appreciate the power of voting.

You can make the difference. EXERCISE IT. REGISTER TO VOTE TODAY.
-----------------------------

*Many thanks to Romerz for this comment which I have included in this post :
Even if you don't believe that a single vote may count or that none of the candidates or parties offered are up to your mark, you should still register as a voter or at least turn up at the polls.

This will make it more difficult for cheating to take place.

If you do not wish to vote for anyone but by going to the polls to claim your ballot, you would have at least made it more difficult for someone else who covets your vote.

JOKES FOR GEEKS, NERDS AND NET ADDICTS

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 09:30:00 +0000

Bill Gates died in a car accident. He found himself in Purgatory being sized up by God. "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world and yet you created that ghastly Windows 95. I'm going to do something I've never done before. In your case, I'm going to let you decide where you want to go!"

Bill replied, "Well, thanks, God. What's the difference between the two?"

God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly if it will help you make a decision."

"Fine, but where should I go first?"

God said, "I'm going to leave that up to you."

Bill said, "OK, then, let's try Hell first." So Bill went to Hell.

It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters.

There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water,laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the temperature was perfect.

Bill was very pleased. "This is great!" he told God, "If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!"

"Fine," said God and off they went.

Heaven was a high place in the clouds, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for a quick minute and rendered his decision.

"Hmm, I think I prefer Hell," he told God.

"Fine," retorted God, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell.

Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When God arrived in Hell, he found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons. "How's everything going, Bill?" God asked.

Bill responded - his voice full of anguish and disappointment, "This is awful, this is not what I expected. I can't believe this happened. What happened to that other place with the beaches and the beautiful women playing in the water?"

God says, "Ah! That was the screen saver."

-----------------------------------

Badtimes

If you receive an e-mail with a subject of "Badtimes," delete it immediately WITHOUT reading it. This is the most dangerous e-mail virus yet. It will rewrite your hard drive.

Not only that, but it will scramble any disks that are even close to your computer. It will recalibrate your refrigerator's coolness setting so that all your ice cream melts. It will demagnetize the strips on all your credit cards, screw up the tracking on your VCR and use the subspace field harmonics to scratch any CDs you try to play. It will give your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend your new phone number. It will mix anti-freeze into your fish tank.

It will drink all your beer and leave its socks out on the coffee table when company is coming over. It will put a dead fish in the back pocket of your good suit and hide your car keys when you are late for work.

"Badtimes" will make you fall in love with a penguin. It will give you nightmares about circus midgets. It will pour sugar in your gas tank and shave off both your eyebrows while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing the dinner and hotel room to your Visa card.

It will seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if she is dead, such is the power of "Badtimes." It reaches out beyond the grave to sully those things we hold most dear.

It moves your car randomly around parking lots so you can't find it. It will kick your dog. It will leave libidinous messages on your boss' voicemail in your voice! It is insidious and subtle.

It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It is also a rather interesting shade of mauve.

"Badtimes" will give you Dutch elm disease. It will leave the toilet seat up. It will make a batch of Methamphetamine in your bath tub and then leave bacon cooking on the stove while it goes out to chase High School kids with your snowblower.

These are just a few of the things this virus can do. Be warned......."Badtimes" is Bad!

---------------------------------

Computer Problem Report Form

1. Describe your problem: _________________________________________________

2. Now, describe the problem accurately:________________________________________

3. Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:__________________________________

4. Problem Severity:

A. Minor__

B. Minor__

C. Minor__

D. Trivial__

5. Nature of the problem:

A. Locked Up__

B. Frozen__

C. Hung__

D. Shot__

6. Is your computer plugged in? Yes__ No__

7. Is it turned on? Yes__ No__

8. Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes__ No__

9. Have you made it worse? Yes__

10. Have you read the manual? Yes__ No__

11. Are you sure you've read the manual? Yes__ No__

12. Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual? No__

13. Do you think you understood it? Yes__ No__

14. If `Yes' then why can't you fix the problem yourself? _____________________________

15. How tall are you? Are you above this line? __________________

16. What were you doing with your computer at the time the problem

occurred?

_________________________________________________

17. If `nothing' explain why you were logged in.

_________________________________________________

18. Are you sure you aren't imagining the problem? Yes__ No__

19. How does this problem make you feel? ________________________

20. Tell me about your childhood. _______________________________

21. Do you have any independent witnesses of the problem? Yes__ No__

22. Can't you do something else, instead of bothering me? Yes_

---------------------------

12 Step Internet Recovery Program

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Internet.

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.

3) I will get dressed before noon.

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Internet.

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Internet-deprived.

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the
Internet.

7) I will read a book...if I still remember how.

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Internet.

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Internet.

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Internet will always be there tomorrow!
----------------------
Seventy-three year old Sol had worked in the garment center all his life, never finding the time to get married. But one day a beautiful seventeen-year-old girl walked into the store and it was love at first sight.

Within a month Sol and Rachel were married and on the way to Florida for their honeymoon.

"So how was it?" asked Herschel, Sol's partner, on the couple's return.

"Oh, just beautiful," replied a starry-eyed Sol. "The sun, the surf . . . and we made love almost every night, we--"

"Just a minute," interrupted Herschel. "At your age, forgive me for asking, you made love almost every night?"

"Oh yes," said Sol, "we almost made love Saturday, we almost made love Sunday . . ."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Have a lovely evening!

OF SCARS, PAIN AND LOVE

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 04:07:00 +0000

As a teenager, one of my favourite habits was squeezing my zits. Shocked? Come on. I am sure many of you did that when you were young ;) Yet, as I grew older, I soon realized that the unbecoming habit of expelling pus from ripened PIMPLES and painstakingly collecting the yellow harvest on a tissue paper would not only cause pain but leave behind crater-like scars. At one stage, my complexion was so bad that I did not even dare to look at myself in the mirror! Fortunately, a healthy diet plus loads of vitamin C soon healed those unsightly marks left behind by my itching fingers. But are we all that lucky?

In our individual lives, we may be carrying scars – the inner fears and pains, bad memories of painful experiences which are very latent obstacles that hinder the way to open communication, loving and being loved. For over twenty years, I counselled many people with all kinds of hurts, scars and traumatic experiences and learnt so much about others and even more about myself. Physical scars can be rectified via cosmetic surgeries, medication or ointments but one takes a longer time to recover from the deep and painful emotional scars inflicted by others, ourselves or circumstances.

There are scars of time…

Those memories that we carry with us...painful but never forgotten experiences that scarred us for life, beautiful and evergreen memories of memorable moments in our lives that we wish we could live again - so much so that we wish we could go into a time machine and do it all again or even perhaps, differently...

Then there are the scars from physical strain...

Perhaps our loved ones worked and toiled to give us what we needed at the expense of their own opportunities in life. And when we look at the scars on their hands, the rough calloused skin or even the wrinkles on their faces, we realize that they love us so much to sacrifice that part of them, that we may live, that we may go to school, that our lives may be richer...that their dreams and hopes for us may be fulfilled...

Then there are the scars formed from rituals or ravages of war...

There could be those who had scars inflicted on them because of customs and rituals.. Because they honored their tribe, they went through the pain and bore the scars as a mark of manhood or womanhood...Such strength is seldom seen in modern society, right?

There are many who may have lost a limb or an eye because they fought for their motherland...And the sacrifices they made - a true love lost, a lifetime of happiness gone in the twinkling of an eye because of a war that never should have been...

But then again, to what extent did/do these scars cause pain and affect us?

Sometimes, we act ‘roles’, wear ‘masks’ and play ‘games’. To me, these are our built-in defenses which we use to protect our vulnerability to the formation and development of scars. Our defense system form patterns of action and reaction in such a way that it can sometimes be so intense that they may take over our true self to the extent that we lose sight of our true identity and worse still, integrity. Is this what has happened to modern society and worse still, the leaders of our country?

What then makes one live a lie or to spread lies and make others believe in them? That is a mystery that I can never unravel...

In reality, each of us experiences deep fears which reveal who we are and that can be quite disconcerting indeed. Perhaps we fear we would be rejected on that count and so we resort instead to seek refuge in our roles, masks and games – a reflex action that has become second nature to many.

Through time, we may be so adept at this that it may be difficult for us to distinguish who we really are, at a given moment in time. What we are and who we are – are these the same?

Such is the complexity of the human condition – a very human problem indeed.

Nonetheless, it is one where we can try to find ourselves, and when we really do, can take off towards the path of growth, integrity and love. Then only do we really begin to live.

I am in a philosophical mood today as my head is reeling from my vertigo. It is tough enough to finish this post so pardon the lack of flow or unity in the writing. Sometimes, I wonder how much longer I have in this world and it is my desire that before I go, I understand how the sum of all my scars, pain and the love I have given and received in this world has made me who I am. Life is not an easy road to travel. We are born, we go through the different stages of life and there is so much that we can choose to experience or to avoid. I just hope that this humble post of mine can make all of us think of how precious indeed are all the various experiences that have enriched our lives in ways that we could never imagine.

We all have our scars, pain and stories of love to tell and it is my prayer that each of us will leave behind a legacy by which we can be remembered...

*This post is specially dedicated to all my blog readers, friends and relatives who may still be struggling with the scars from our past....May you be freed from the pain and receive the love from those around you in your road to recovery....

Have a great weekend, dear reader!

FALLACIES, FOOLS AND FACTS

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 07:00:00 +0000

What do you see when you enter a news portal in cyberspace? We are faced with an onslaught of headlines deriding the folly of political leaders as demonstrated in their actions or lack of it, protests about the discriminatory ways in which laws are enforced to gladden the hearts of a wicked crust of society, battles between individuals fighting for higher positions of power - the list is endless.

Such is the pathetic state we see before us. It is about in-fighting, nepotism, cronyism, racism, corruption, power struggles to strengthen their own positions, the despicable low-handed manner in which some try to reinforce their strongholds, slime balls lolling in mire that is as black as their evil hearts.

Do our leaders lead the country and the people to a better future, the ones who elected them to power? Instead, they squabble amongst themselves, then they sing their differences for the greater good of their party, meet to talk balderdash and then make incredulous announcements that rattle the already shaky stock market. It is nothing but an Catch 22 situation of moronic creatures masquerading as Einstein wannabes or Churchill fakes that lead the people into a maze of confusion till many lose their vision. The leaders spew crap and expect us to swallow their fallacies and carefully packaged PR(public relations) myths.

Since I am retired and have lots of time on my hands, I have modified some of my lecture notes for Fallacies of Thoughts in the context of Malaysian politics. I believe it is important to understand the context and motivation of their messages and spin tales to avoid being beguiled or swayed by their propaganda.

-------------------------------------------------------
What is a fallacy?

A fallacy is an error in reasoning. A fallacy is an "argument" in which the premises given for the conclusion do not provide the needed degree of support.

A factual error is being wrong about the facts.

A deductive fallacy is a deductive argument that is invalid (it is such that it could have all true premises and still have a false conclusion).

An inductive fallacy is less formal than a deductive fallacy. They are simply "arguments" which seem to be inductive arguments, but the premises do not provided enough support for the conclusion. In such cases, even if the premises were true, the conclusion would not be more likely to be true.

There are many types of fallacies and these are used in many forms of communication. The following is just a few that I selected at random. For more, please CLICK HERE.
-----------------------------------------------------
The Bare Assertion

This is when our leaders distort a question by denying that there is one.

Example : Why didn’t so and so get arrested/questioned when he said this and that whereas so and so had a different treatment differently?

Their response: THAT’S THE WAY IT IS. He has been suspended so end of story. FULL STOP. NFA - NO FURTHER ACTION....screeeeech...brake!

---------------------------------------------------

Begging the Question

Begging the Question is a fallacy in which the premises include the claim that the conclusion is true or (directly or indirectly) assume that the conclusion is true.

It is a logical fallacy in which the proposition to be proved is assumed implicitly or explicitly in the premise. Begging the question is related to circular argument, circulus in probando or circular reasoning.

---------------------------------------------------

Oversimplification

Do you realize that our leaders use phrases like “It all boils down to….”

“It’s a simple question of…”

E.g. So and so was detained to protect her/him. No further questions.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Black and white thinking

Black and white thinking means seeing the world only in terms of extremes. In real-life, situations are almost always in shades of gray, not black or white.

GUILTY or NOT GUILTY (no need for trial or discussion. Their word is LAW!!!)

A THREAT or NOT A THREAT.

EITHER YOU ARE FOR THEM or AGAINST THEM. No discussion. Black is black. White is White. It is like that. Too bad if you don’t like it. Just keep quiet.

Well, many leaders choose to practise black and white thinking (actually I am surprised if they think at all).

----------------------------------------------
COMPLEX QUESTION

Also known as loaded questions, this is when the leaders try to rephrase a certain issue in such a way that they cover an even larger and more urgent question.

The following example is from Wikipedia:

"Are you still beating your wife?" Whether the respondent answers yes or no, he will admit to having a wife, and having beaten her at some time in the past."

------------------------------------------
Appeal to Force

This is when a moron tries to sabotage a person’s argument by implying it is NOT TRUE because his own is in the majority.

Example: When A complains about &&&, certain quarters file police reports against A for insulting the ###. The real problem persists in the light of such developments. Tsk tsk tsk...

-------------------------------
Hasty Generalization is another popular fallacy and you can read more HERE.

------------------------------
If you scrutinise statements of certain leaders, you can actually spot illogical, dishonest and dangerous arguments from certain characters used deliberately for their personal vendetta. I cannot comprehend why they persist in making such a fool of themselves and expect the rakyat to tolerate this?

If you cannot be a true leader, don’t be one.

If you cannot act like a leader, don’t call yourself one.

If you have no genuine intention to serve this country, please step down!

What is wrong with leaders in Malaysia?

Of late, we've had a surfeit of fallacies and fools. What we need now would be hard facts to tell us how our country can be a better place.

We want the facts in real terms tangibly in dollars and cents. E.g. When a stimulus package is announced, we want full disclosure of the 5Ws and 1H of things - where the money went and how much $$$ or investment or jobs have been stimulated that we can all rejoice together instead of hanging our heads down in doom and gloom. A blog reader, Pug, has also suggested that we have a written reports of where every ringgit and sen went since 1957, a KPI report, a 5-year revenue forecast and also if I may add, any economic data (none from any PR company) which would help to boost our international standing to woo more investors to our country and to strengthen our ringgit.

No more fallacies or lies, please. We are not fools but we know who are the real fools.

WE ARE MALAYSIANS!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

FYI - What is a fool? extracted from Wikipedia

A jester, joker, jokester, fool, wit-cracker, prankster or buffoon was a person employed to tell jokes and provide general entertainment, typically by a European monarch. Jesters are stereotypically thought to have worn brightly colored clothes and eccentric hats in a motley pattern. Their hats were especially distinctive; made of cloth, they were floppy with three points, each of which had a jingle bell at the end. The three points of the hat represent the donkey's ears and tail worn by jesters in earlier times. Other things distinctive about the jester were his laughter and his mock sceptre, known as a bauble or marotte.

In societies where freedom of speech was not recognized as a right, the court jester—precisely because anything he said was by definition "a jest" and "the uttering of a fool"—could speak frankly on controversial issues in a way in which anyone else would have been severely punished for.

Monarchs understood the usefulness of having such a person at their side. Still, even the jester was not entirely immune from punishment, and he needed to walk a thin line and exercise careful judgment in how far he might go - which required him to be far from a fool, in the modern sense.

TGIF BEST OF THE BEST JOKES FOR EVERYONE

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 01:35:00 +0000

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there was an madman who was committed to an asylum. The asylum had a rule that if any 'resident' could pass a special 5-question test, he could go free. No resident had passed in the 20-year history of the asylum. It was the madman's turn to take the test.

After a grueling 4 hours of testing, the examining officer said, "Well, you've passed four of the five tests. I'm very impressed. However, the last test is the hardest of all."

The examiner lead the man to a dark room, switched on a flashlight, and pointed it at a light bulb hanging from the ceiling. "For your fifth test, you must walk on the beam of light and change the bulb."

The madman looked at him with an outraged expression and exclaimed, "Are you NUTS?!?"

He continued, "Yeah right, when I reach half-way you'll turn it off and let me fall!"

*This joke is specially to all blog readers who enjoy humor :-).
-----------------------
Her First Visit (specially dedicated to all my friends in the medical fraternity including Dr. Murali, Dr. Saravanan, Dr.Justine, Dr. Roopi, Dr. Tranquility, Xinch, Lyn, Nisha, Nicholas Aw, Thomas, etc)

A pretty young woman visiting her new doctor for the first time found herself alone in a small waiting room. She began undressing nervously, preparing herself for the upcoming examination. Just as she draped the last of her garments over the back of a chair, a light rap sounded on the door and a young doctor strode in.

Coming to an abrupt halt, the doctor looked his nude patient up and down carefully and with considerable appreciation. "Miss Jones," he said finally, "it seems quite obvious to me that until today you have never undergone an eye examination."

-------------------------------
Washing Your Cat (specially dedicated to Cat-in-Sydney, Chahya, Datin Mamasita & all my blog readers who are cat lovers - don't take this seriously...it's just for laughs)

Some people have the misconception that cats never have to be bathed.

That somehow they "lick" themselves clean. Well contrary to this popular belief, cats do NOT have some enzyme in their saliva that resembles soap flakes (with or without bleach).

Cats, like their nemesis, the dog .... do get dirty and have a variety of odours... from smelling like the outhouse where you camped last year to the same odour as your dog's breath. (Remember ... your dog will try to eat anything.) Now we all know that cats HATE water.

And we know that giving the cat a sedative to ease this process of a bath is out of the question, so, the best approach is both sneaky and direct. Remember now, this is not the dumb dog who can be led to tub with lies and a trail of Kibbles and Bits.

Although your cat has the advantage of smarts, quickness and total lack of concern for you .... you have the advantage of size, strength, and the ability to wear protective garments.

1. First .... dress for the occasion. A 4-ply rubber wet suit is suggested, along with a helmet, face mask and welders gloves.

2. A Bathtub with a glass enclosure is preferred to the one with a shower curtain. A frenzied cat can shred one of these in about 3.5 seconds.

3. Have the Kitty Bubbles and towel in the enclosed bathtub area before hand. No ... blow drying the cat after the bath is not suggested.

4. Draw the water, making it a little warmer than needed as you still need to find the cat. Position everything strategically in the shower, so you can reach it even if you are face down or prone in the tub.

5. Find your cat. Use the element of surprise. Pick the cat up, nonchalantly, as if you were simply carrying him/her to the supper dish. No need to worry about the cat noticing your strange attire...the cat barely notices you anyway.

6. Once you and the cat are inside the bathroom .... speed is essential. In one single liquid motion shut the door to the bathroom, step into the shower, close the sliding doors, and drop the cat into the water. While the cat is still in a state of shock, locate the Kitty Bubbles and squirt whatever part of him is above the water line. You have just begun the wildest 45 seconds of your life. Remember that cats have no handles and add the fact that he now has soapy fur. His state of shock has
worn off and he's madder than a wet hornet.

7. As best, you can, wearing welder's gloves, try to field his body as he catapults through the air toward the ceiling. If possible, give another squirt of Kitty Bubbles with his body now fully exposed.

8. During the 5 seconds you are able to hold onto him, rub vigorously. No need to worry about rinsing. As he slides down the glass enclosure into the tub, he will fall back into the water, rinsing himself in the process.

9. Only attempt the lather and rinse process about 3 times. The cat will realise the lack of traction on the glass by then and will use the next attempt on the first available part of you.

10. Next, the cat must be dried. No...this is NOT the easiest part. By this stage, you are worn out and the cat has just become semi-permanently affixed to your right leg. We suggest here that you drain the tub and in full view of your cat, reach for the bottle of Kitty Bubbles.

11. If you have done step 10 correctly, the cat will be off your leg and hanging precariously from your helmet. Although this view of the cat is most disgusting, he will be in a much better position for wrapping the towel around him.

12. Be sure cat is firmly wrapped in towel before opening tub enclosure. Open bathroom door .... put towel wrapped cat on floor and step back quickly. Into tub, if possible, and do not open enclosure until all you can see is the shredded towel.

13. In about 2 hours .... it will be safe to exit the bathroom. Your cat will be sitting out there somewhere looking like a small hedgehog while plotting revenge.

---------------------------------

Are You Stupid? (specially for former colleagues/students)

One day a college professor of Psychology was greeting his new college class. He stood up in front of the class and said, "Would everyone who thinks he or she is stupid please stand up?"

After a minute or so of silence, a young man stood up.

"Well, hello there sir. So you actually think you're a moron?" the professor asked.

The kid replied, "No sir, I just didn't want to see you standing there all by yourself."

-------------------------------
The following joke is dedicated to all blog readers who are animal lovers...

A single man wanted someone to help him with the household chores, so he decided to get a pet to help out.

He went to the local pet shop and asked the owner for advice on a suitable animal. The owner suggested a dog, but the man said, "Nah, dogs can't do dishes." The owner then suggested a cat, but the man said, "Nah, cats can't do the ironing."

Finally the owner suggests a centipede, "This is the perfect pet for you. It can do anything!" "OK," the man thought, "I'll give it a try," so he bought it and took it home.

Once home he told the centipede to wash the dishes. The centipede looks over and there are piles and piles of dirty dishes that look to be a month old. Five minutes later, all the pots are washed, dried, and put away. "Great," thought the man.

Then he told the centipede to do the dusting and vacuuming. Fifteen minutes later the house is spotless. Wow, thought the man, so he decided to try another idea. "Go down to the corner and get me the evening paper," he told the centipede, and off it went.

Fifteen minutes later, the centipede hadn't returned. 30 minutes later and still no centipede. Forty-five minutes and the man was sick of waiting, so he got up and went out to look for the centipede.

As he opened the front door, there on the step was the centipede. "Hey, whatcha' doing there? I sent you out for the paper 45 minutes ago and now I find you out here without the paper! What gives?"

"Hold on a minute!" said the centipede, "I'm still putting on my boots!"

------------------------------------
Five Stages Of Inebriation (FOR NON-MUSLIMS ONLY - Please forgive me if this part of the post offends you. My intention is to humor and not to insult. Thanks for understanding.)

Stage 1 - SMART
---------------
This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known universe. You know you know everything and you want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are always RIGHT. And of course, the person you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for an interesting argument when both parties
are SMART.

Stage 2 - GOOD LOOKING
----------------------
This is when you realize that you are the BEST LOOKING person in the entire bar and that people fancy you. You can go up to a perfect stranger knowing they fancy you and really want to talk to you. Keep in mind that you are still SMART, so you can talk to
this person about any subject under the sun.

Stage 3 - RICH
--------------
This is when you suddenly become the RICHEST person in the world. You can buy drinks for the entire bar because you have an armored truck full of money parked behind the bar. You can also make bets at this stage, because of course you're still SMART, so naturally, you will win all your bets. It doesn't matter how much you bet because you are RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that you fancy, because you are also the BEST LOOKING person in the world.

Stage 4 - BULLET PROOF
----------------------
You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone, especially those with whom you have been betting or arguing. This is because nothing can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to the partners of the people whom you fancy and challenge them to a battle of wits or money. You have no fear of losing this battle, because you're SMART, you're RICH and Hell, you're better looking than them anyway!

Stage 5 - INVISIBLE
-------------------
This is the final stage of Drunkenness. At this point you can do anything, because NO ONE CAN SEE YOU. You dance on a table to impress the people whom you fancy, because the rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You are also invisible to the person who wants to fight you. You can walk through the street singing at the top of your lungs because no one can see or hear you - and because you're still SMART you know ALL the words."

----------------------------

Surprise Package

A man was drinking in a bar when he noticed this beautiful young lady sitting next to him.

"Hello there," says the man, "and what is your name?"

"Hello," giggles the woman, "I'm Stacey. What's yours?"

"I'm Jim."

"Jim, do you want to come over to my house tonight? I mean, right
now??"

"Sure!" replies Jim, "Let's go!"

So Stacey takes Jim to her house and takes him to her room. Jim sits down on the bed and notices a picture of a man on Stacey's desk.

"Stacey, I noticed the picture of a man on your desk," Jim says.

"Yes? And what about it?" asks Stacey.

"Is it your brother?"

"No, it isn't, Jim!" Stacey giggles. Jim's eyes widen, suspecting that it might be Stacey's husband.

When he finally asks, "Is it your husband?"

Stacey giggles even more, "No, silly!" Jim was relieved.

"Then, it must be your boyfriend!"

Stacey giggles even more while nibbling on Jim's ear. She says, "No, silly!!"

"Then, who is it?" Jim asks.

Stacey replies, "That's me BEFORE my operation!!"

---------------------------
The following joke is dedicated to all my blog readers (especially Andrea, Walt, Nick,Pug, Sandy, Edward etc who have to partake of this activity : WORK.

There is a dangerous virus going around. It is called WORK.

If you receive WORK from your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else, via E-mail or any other means, DO NOT TOUCH IT!

This virus wipes out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with WORK, put on your jacket, take two good friends and go straight to the nearest pub.

Order the antidote known as BEER. Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

Forward this warning immediately to at least 5 friends. Should you realize that you do not have 5 friends, this means that you are already infected and that WORK already controls your life.

REMEMBER, THIS VIRUS IS DEADLY!

Have a great weekend, dear reader!!! THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MORALLY IMMORAL

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 09:03:00 +0000

Guess who made this statement: 'It morally wrong to ask for bonus as the country is still struggling to sail out of the economic downturn and people in the private sector are being retrenched.'

The Sun reported:

It is morally wrong to ask for bonus as the country is still struggling to sail out of the economic downturn and people in the private sector are being retrenched, Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Abdul Razak said today.

"It's morally wrong to ask for bonus when the economy has not recovered. I keep telling Cuepacs (president Omar Osman) that it cannot be just like a trade union, shout for bonus every time (there is budget) because you want to (remain) popular among your members," he said.

Cuepacs, the umbrella body for public sector unions, is pushing the government for a two-month bonus for the 1.2 million civil servants in the country.

"In the private sector, the people are getting retrenched and it doesn't happen in the government service.

"However, that does not mean excellent workers cannot be rewarded, but unfortunately such a system was not in place. (RATIONALE?)

"If you have a system that motivates them, even the civil servants can rise and become high-performance workers. We should reward these entire people. "We should not settle for the second best, push them high. CLICK HERE to read more.

In view of such developments, it is time for Malaysians to take a revision course in Moral 101. Please click on the activated links to get a full understanding of each moral issue.

Course Outline Moral 101 Course in Malaysia

1. It is morally wrong to ask for a bonus for civil servants when the economy has not recovered.

2. It is alright to spend RM20 million on a Apco Worldwide, an international public affairs and media relations company, to boost the government's image overseas.

Najib is not the first prime minister, however, to use expensive foreign help to boost his image and that of his administration.

Tun Abdullah Ahmad Badawi also used a foreign-based public relations firm to help project a positive image of himself as a progressive Muslim leader, and Malaysia as a modern Muslim nation.

The Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad administration had used disgraced lobbyist Jack Abramoff.

3. There is no moral dispute over the loss of more than RM 1.4 billion in Rawang-Ipoh double-tracking project. (CLICK HERE for the 2005/2006 Economic Report)

4. There is no moral issue that Mara paid RM84,640 for two units of Acer notebooks plus millions for other overpriced computer equipment.

5. There is no moral issue that Government guarantees failed Prasarana bonds of over RM 7 billion.

6. It is perfectly normal for buildings collapse. The roof of the RM300mil Sultan Mizan Zainal Abidin Stadium in Gong Badak collapsed . Ceiling panels at theJalan Duta Court Complex collapsed, Perak State Parks Corporation Complex in Pulau Banding collapsed, and now a 3-week old bridge collapsed in Perak!!!

7. It is perfectly moral to construct the Kuala Lumpur Courts Complex at a final cost of RM290 million. There is no moral issue that months after the start of its operation, the courts complex experienced a series of faults and technical failures, raising questions of the building's reliability and the parties involved in the construction of the building, which was only very recently opened. Click HERE to read the detailed report.

8. It is not a moral problem when a country has lost RM28 billion through excessive payments for contracts and procurements as announced in the Auditor-General's Report. It is the norm and not a form of deviance.

9. It is morally upright alright that RM2.37bil has been spent to finance the national service (NS) programme since it was introduced in 2004. RM608.6mil was spent in 2004, RM604.8mil in 2005, RM588.2mil in 2006 and RM565mil in 2007. Defence Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak had said earlier that the programme would not exceed RM500mil a year.

10. No moral issues are involved in the Port Klang Free Trade Zone RM12.5 billion loss.

11. No one is caught in a moral quandry with regards to the RM70 million (originally priced at RM 490million) Brickendonbury Sports HPTC and establish an inquiry to ascertain who were responsible for the folly of wasting RM2 million in pursuing the project and who had really benefited.

12. It is indeed moral for a Budget 2010 allocation of RM394 million to compensate toll concessionaires for not raising toll rates without remembering that the government had also paid RM180 million in 2009 and RM380 million in 2008 under the Works Ministry as similar compensation.

Malaysians forget easily so Moral 101 ends here. This will enable us to remember these facts and issues fresh in our minds.

Warning: Please do not use your calculator to compute the total figures listed. Your calculator could go into 1Destructive mode.

Readers are welcome to add to the list. Do you think we could hit #100 within three hours?

MALAYSIA BOLEH?

THINGS THAT WOMEN WISH MEN COULD UNDERSTAND

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 03:00:00 +0000

As a woman, I have to admit that it is very difficult to understand women and quite difficult to understand men :-). Each of us is different regardless of our gender and our psychological make-up which makes us unique. Here's a collection of stuff about women that could help men to understand them better :-). Have a great day, dear reader!

---------------------------------------------------
Top 10 Things That Only Women Understand but wish Men could understand as well!

#10. Why they have pleasure in owning five pairs of black shoes.

#9. Why they have pleasure in differentiating between cream, ivory, and off-white.

#8. Why crying over the phone while talking to their best friend does not mean they are insane - they are just having a therapeutic session.

#7. Why they must have clothes in different sizes to fit their dynamic bodies which can be fat during one period and slim in a different period.

#6. Why a salad, diet drink, and a hot fudge sundae is definitely a balanced meal.

#5. Why the process of discovering a designer dress on the clearance rack can be
considered one of life's ecstatic experiences.

#4. Why women believe in the inaccuracy of every single type of bathroom scale ever made.

#3. Why women lament that a good man might be hard to find, but a good hairdresser is next to impossible.

#2. Why women wish that men could understand why and how a phone call between two women never lasts under ten minutes.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THING ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND:

1. OTHER WOMEN!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------T

To be fair to the men, here's a list of men's semantic patterns to help women to understand men.:-)

"I can't find it," REALLY MEANS, "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

"That's women's work," REALLY MEANS, "It's dirty, difficult and thankless."

"Will you marry me?" REALLY MEANS, "Both my roommates have moved out, I can't find the washer, and there is no more peanut butter."

"It's a guy thing," REALLY MEANS, "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

"Can I help with dinner?" REALLY MEANS, "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"It would take too long to explain," REALLY MEANS, "I have no idea how it works."

"I'm getting more exercise lately," REALLY MEANS, "The batteries in the remote are dead."

"We're going to be late," REALLY MEANS, "Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."

"Take a break, honey, you're working too hard," REALLY MEANS, "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"That's interesting, dear," REALLY MEANS, "Are you still talking?"

"Honey, we don't need material things to prove our love," REALLY MEANS, "I forgot our anniversary again."

"You expect too much of me," REALLY MEANS, "You want me to stay awake."

"It's really a good movie," REALLY MEANS, "It's got guns, knives, fast cars, and naked women."

"You know how bad my memory is," REALLY MEANS, "I remember the words to the theme song of "F Troop", the address of the first girl I kissed, the Vehicle Identification Number of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."

"I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses," REALLY MEANS, "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe, wearing a thong."

"Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself. It's no big deal," REALLY MEANS, "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt."

"I do help around the house," REALLY MEANS, "I once threw a dirty towel near the laundry basket."

"Hey, I've got reasons for what I'm doing," REALLY MEANS, "I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."

"What did I do this time?" REALLY MEANS, "What did you catch me doing?"

"She's one of the rabid feminists," REALLY MEANS, "She refused to make my coffee."

"I heard you," REALLY MEANS, "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."

"You really look terrific in that outfit," REALLY MEANS, "Please don't try on another outfit. I'm starving."

"I brought you a present," REALLY MEANS, "It was free ice scraper night at the ball/hockey game."

"I missed you," REALLY MEANS, "I can't find my sock drawer, the kids are hungry and we are out of toilet paper."

"I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are," REALLY MEANS, "No one will ever see us alive again."

"This relationship is getting too serious," REALLY MEANS, "I like you as much as I like my truck."

"We share the housework," REALLY MEANS, "I make the messes. She cleans them up."

"I don't need to read the instructions," REALLY MEANS, "I am perfectly capable of screwing it up without printed help."

HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY, DEAR READER!!

ALL THE HOO-HA OVER THE MOOLAH

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 20:28:00 +0000

If you are entitled to a first class seat on a flight to your destination but were ushered to a seat in the economy class and then to be told this move was made on compassionate grounds how would you feel? Outrage? In the same vein of thought, there is currently a big hoo-ha over the oil royalty moolah in Kelantan where Kelantanese do not want alms given to beggars but the legal entitlement of their oil royalties amounting to RM1 billion since 2004.

The Malaysian Insider reported:

“We have decided to give goodwill payment to Kelantan. This decision is made considering the need to develop Kelantan in line with the federal development programme,” he told the Dewan Rakyat, adding that the state will be receiving the allocation beginning next year.

But Najib’s statement immediately sparked an uproar, with Kubang Kerian MP Salahuddin Ayub saying the Kelantanese are not expecting goodwill payment but what is rightfully theirs.

“So all this while, Terengganu have been receiving goodwill payment and not royalties? Under Section 144 of the National Petroleum Act, Terengganu is receiving royalty and not courtesy payment, so how is this possible?” blasted Salahuddin.

“We are not beggars. We are demanding for what is ours,” the PAS vice-president said.

Najib, visibly annoyed by Salahuddin’s attack gave a smirk and merely replied, “You’re trying to politicise the issue. Tak habis-habis dengan politik (never-ending politics).”

However, the prime minister’s statement contradicts the Statistics Department’s State/District Data Bank which lists Kelantan as one of the four oil and gas producing states. The other three are Sabah, Sarawak and Terengganu.

The federal government has argued that oil and gas extraction activities are located about 150km off Kelantan’s shores and is jointly developed with Thailand, and thus beyond the legal limit of state/national boundaries. Also, the territory is being disputed by Thailand and Malaysia.

At a press conference later, Salahuddin said Najib was deliberately trying to mislead the House with his reply that Kelantan does not have rights to claim for oil royalty.

“Under the Act, it is clearly stated that oil producing states must receive 50 per cent of the revenues and it was clear that Najib lied when he said that Terengganu is receiving goodwill payment and not royalties,” he said.

He added that he will refer the prime minister to the privileges committee for misleading the House.

Some felt that .the payment was related to the possibility of a snap polls being called You can read more about it HERE, HERE, HERE and also at THIS LINK.

The Malaysian Insider also said:

Prior to this, the state government had written officially to the federal government seeking RM1 billion in oil royalty since 2004, based on Statistics Department figures.

Nik Aziz said he would convene a meeting of the state executive council to further discuss the oil royalty demand. The mentri besar was disappointed over Najib’s remarks that, from the legal point of view, Kelantan was not entitled to receive the oil royalty.

Thus it appears that the government has a legal obligation to pay the oil royalties and not 'compassionate payment'.

For Tengku Razaleigh's take on this issue, please CLICK HERE.

Please also read THIS ARTICLE on Sarawak Oil Royalty where you can see that Sarawak is only receiving 5% of oil royalty. What a miserable pittance indeed!

In Nigeria, oil royalties have not been directed to the citizens and certain quarters are allowed to cheat the citizens openly while they remain underdeveloped as a whole. It comes as no surprise that ethnic unrest and conflicts broke out when the citizens rebelled to disrupt oil production activities through attacks on wells and pipelines as an expression of the outrage to the injustice. Click HERE to read more.

I certainly hope that what happened in Nigeria will not happen here. It truly saddens me to see how income from the natural resources of a state does not benefit the citizens of that area but fills the coffers of another account. I am also very saddened that some of the richest states e.g. Sarawak, Kelantan and other oil-rich states are not as developed as other states even though they are the richest in terms of natural resources!! Many areas still do not have water/electricity supplies even though dam after dam is being built. Basic infrastructure is still lacking and so much can be done if only the states are enjoying the rewards of their resources that are rightfully channelled back to the people.

So can you blame them for the hoo-ha over the moolah?

*moolah is a slang term for money

MENDING WALLS IN MALAYSIA

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 09:35:00 +0000

I love Frost because of the air of mystery and melancholy surrounding his poems. A few scholars regard Frost as a nature poet who writes in the tradition of Ralph Waldo Emerson and William Wordsworth or even an Imagist in the school of Ezra Pound; however, Frost did not classify himself that way. A look at his poems reveal how his poems deal with the theme of nature in a colloquial tone and have allusions to the American dream.

The following is a post I wrote last year on MENDING WALL. I am re-posting it with a few amendments here and there in synch with current developments in our country/

Mending Wall by Robert Frost

Something there is that doesn’t love a wall,
That sends the frozen-ground-swell under it
And spills the upper boulder in the sun,
And make gaps even two can pass abreast.
The work of hunters is another thing:
I have come after them and made repair
Where they have left not one stone on a stone,
But they would have the rabbit out of hiding,
To please the yelping dogs. The gaps I mean,
No one has seen them made or heard them made,
But at spring mending-time we find them there,
I let my neighbor know beyond the hill;
And on a day we meet to walk the line
And set the wall between us once again.
We keep the wall between us as we go.
To each the boulders that have fallen to each.
And some are loaves and some so nearly balls
We have to use a spell to make them balance:
“Stay where you are until our backs are turned!”
We wear our fingers rough with handling them.
Oh, just another kind of outdoor game,
One on a side. It comes to little more:
There where it is we do not need the wall:
He is all pine and I am apple orchard.
My apple trees will never get across
And eat the cones under his pines, I tell him.
He only says, “Good fences make good neighbors.”
Spring is the mischief in me, and I wonder
If I could put a notion in his head:
“Why do they make good neighbors? Isn’t it
Where there are cows? But here there are no cows.
Before I built a wall I’d ask to know
What I was walling in or walling out,
And to whom I was like to give offense.
Something there is that doesn’t love a wall,
That wants it down.” I could say “Elves” to him,
But it’s not elves exactly, and I’d rather
He said it for himself. I see him there,
Bringing a stone grasped firmly by the top
In each hand, like an old-stone savage armed.
He moves in darkness as it seems to me,
Not of woods only and the shade of trees.
He will not go behind his father’s saying,
And he likes having thought of it so well
He says again, “Good fences make good neighbors.”

His poetry speaks to the ordinary person with simple yet evocative images. It is easy to approach Frost's poetry which is not esoteric or verbose; besides, he uses words that allow the reader to connect with tangible objects and authentic emotion. He uses no pretense, as shown by this straightforward line from “Mending Wall“:

“We keep the wall between us as we go.”

Ok. Enough background information and now it is time to look at the poem.
———————————————————————————————-
“Mending Wall”, which was written in 1915, is Robert Frost’s tribute to one man’s notion of being a good neighbor even as that concept is the opposite of his own. It is the opening poem in Robert Frost’s second collection of poetry, North of Boston (1915). He wrote it with homesick feelings as he was living in England with his wife and four children before WW1.

It is said that French-Canadian Napoleon Guay who had been Frost’s neighbor in New Hampshire a few years earlier inspired him to write this poem because he often repeated the phrase, “Good fences make good neighbors,” during the routine repairs on the wall between their farms.

“Good fences” symbolically refer to personal boundaries that remind us of the American pioneer mentality of staking a claim and taking ownership. Personally, I believe that Frost does not subscribe to this dream and in fact, hints at another version.

To me, “Mending Wall” illustrates the idea of personal and natural freedom, as well as limitations, of a rural existence. The poem questions the necessity of a wall, like questioning the wisdom of perpetuating an old habit/tradition. Interestingly, Frost later became American “goodwill ambassador” first to South America and then to Soviet Union during President Kennedy’s administration. Obviously, Kennedy thought Frost should foster positive relations with other people and cultures internationally in the light of his interest in the dilemma of borders in “Mending Wall”.

I find this poem particularly meaningful as Frost shows us the complexities of humanity through the relationship between man and nature and even in communal and personal space. A deep thinker, Frost asks us to contemplate the meaning of “neighbor” and “boundary”.

“Mending Wall” has two characters: its narrator and his neighbor who are owners of adjacent farms. They meet each Spring to repair the stone wall that separates their properties. Initially, the narrator seems be skeptical in his attitude toward property. but later Frost shows that it is in fact more complicated.The poem opens with his words “Something there is that doesn’t love a wall”—a phrase he repeats later, making it a kind of slogan for the position on property he personifies.

The poem seems to imply that if a stone is missing form the fence, you can bet that the two men are out there putting it back together piece by piece. Now let’s think of this in the Malaysian context. Do we see people ready to mend fences or do they make walls higher or new barriers?

Frost’s description of every detail in this poem is quite interesting, very pleasant to read, and extremely imaginable.

On one hand, Frost makes literal implications about what the two men are doing. For instance, they are physically putting the stones back, one by one. Their dedication, commitment, and constant drive shines through when reading how persistence these men seem about keeping the wall intact.

Quite the contrary however, is the inferences that something even deeper is going on. There is a sharing experience taking place here. Indeed, by laboring so hard, each man is experiencing physical repercussions, but they are also using this time as a “meet and greet” period.

One can deduce from the beginning of the poem that the wall has many forces that keeps it in shambles. For instance, Frost writes:

“…that sends the frozen ground swell under it and spills the upper boulders in the sun…”,

and also:

“I have come after them(hunters) and made repair where they have left not one stone on a stone…”

The man and his neighbor don’t seem to have time for anything else, for it sounds as if they are constantly making repairs. Is there a reason for this? Doesn’t it sound familiar?

It is important to note that not only are these men completing a manly task, they are also “building” some type of relationship. If this were not an issue, the neighbor would not repeat;

“Good fences make good neighbors.”

As the man tells his story, it seems that while the two men may be conversing and interacting, there is some distance between them at all times. The man says:

“…on a day we meet to walk the line and set the wall between us once again.”

I believe Frost is telling us that while there is a need for friendship in each of us, it is equally as necessary for us to have our own space.

As the poem continues we see that what is taking place is almost like a game. In fact, he says;

“We keep the wall between us as we go”.

This is almost like there is this game of leapfrog taking place!

I find the following line most intriguing:

“He is all pine and I am apple orchard,”

That line reminds us that each of us are different in our personality or likes, dislikes, etc. One of the men grow “apples” while the other only has “pines”. Nonetheless, each are special and both of them contain separate, yet endearing qualities.

I spent some time thinking of Frost’s use of the “stone” itself. What could he have meant by this poem?

“Stay where you are until our backs are turned“.

He is speaking to the stones. It seems as though he is telling them that if they are going to fall, please wait until he is not looking. This seems to be quite strange as the man appears so bored at times that he would talk about or to anything.

Maybe the neighbor is not as much of a talker as one might have imagined. Maybe the man only has himself and these inanimate objects to converse with. After all, the only quote by the neighbor in this poem is:

“Good fences make good neighbors.”

In another light however, there is the idea of separation, or segregation. The two men are consistently kept apart by this wall. I think Frost contrasts his “wall” of separation with the idea of segregation in our world. We are left with the impression that if two people have differences, no matter the extent, they are not considered equals by society.

There is the recurring idea that the wall should not be there in the first place.

“Something there is that doesn’t love a wall.”

In the final analysis, I think what Frost is trying to say in this poem is that walls don’t make good neighbors simply because walls are unnecessary. Some of you may disagree, but if the poem is read in-depth, it is obvious that Frost does not condone mending walls between people. The beginning of the poem makes the speaker seem like he’s alright with the wall.

I seriously believe that it is actually just because he’s following tradition and conforming without thinking individually. The speaker meets up with his neighbor to repair the wall and the neighbor says,

“Good fences make good neighbors.”

Then the speaker is able to start thinking about the actual purpose of the wall/fence which doesn’t really do anything except keep the neighbors apart or keep in livestock (which is not present). The speaker likens the neighbor to a savage, making him appear old-fashioned and traditional. The neighbor keeps true to the beliefs held by his father and repeats,

“Good fences make good neighbors.”

The main theme of this poem is to stir us to question traditions. The fence (wall) divides the neighbors and alienates them from each other–not exactly a “good neighbor” in itself. From the way the speaker likens the neighbor to a savage, it is obvious that the speaker thinks the neighbor is in the wrong when he believes in mending walls.

The fence/wall represents old traditions, especially traditions that are actually bad for society. Frost is sending a message to the readers that we should do away with this “wall” and commit to new ideas which will benefit human relations. However, the pessimistic message he also sends us is contained in the last three lines.

The neighbor remains faithful to his father’s tradition and continues thinking well of fences. This represents the way members of a society are so susceptible to conformity to traditional views and thus are hard to change. Frost is negatively saying that most of the time, no matter how bad the tradition is, people still refuse to accept change. Does it not sound familiar again?

It seems that his neighbor can appear dangerous as well, and Frost ends with his neighbor’s statement, “Good fences make good neighbors”. In short, the fence is what physically keeps the two neighbors apart, but also brings them together each spring to mend it once again.

May this happen in Malaysia. May the differences that keep us apart also draw us together as we yearn for progress in our country.

This sentence infers that the wall separating we as a people, needs to come down. It is virtually impossible for us to build lasting relationships while we are still possessed with hatred and discrimination.

May the walls that separate us from one another in Malaysia come tumbling down!!!! The choice is ours – to build walls or to tear down the walls.

What is your opinion of this poem and your dream for the walls in our country?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

FYI

Due to his immense popularity and resonance with common Americans , he has been nicknamed America’s Poet. He writes of home, of yelping dogs, apple trees, and rough fingers. His poems recall a simpler, idealized time of prosperity and fertility.

Frost received such a wide range of awards and distinctions, including four Pulitzer Prizes!! Despite his popularity, Frost did not participate in the modernistic, free-verse experiments of his fellow poets. He preferred to convey his thematic messages through meter, rhyme, and form. The U.S. Senate passed a resolution dedicated to Frost on his seventy-fifth birthday, declaring that “His poems have helped to guide American thought and humor and wisdom, setting forth to our minds a reliable representation of ourselves and of all men.”

HE COULD HAVE, BUT HE DIDN'T. YOU?

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 04:15:00 +0000

It was in late October when I first met Uncle Bernard aka Zorro at one of the vigils in Petaling Jaya. Then and even now, I was completely awed by his commanding presence. To 'baby' bloggers like me, he is the Father of Malaysian bloggers. Looking like a white-haired sage from old Chinese sword-fighting movies, his gruff and deep voice commands a respect that has a deep-lasting impact, reverberating even through cyberspace. When Zorro speaks, Malaysia listens!

As a Khoo clanswoman, I am proud of Uncle Bernard. He could have been puffing his pipe, drinking his beer, playing with his grandchildren, reading his books, doing social service or enjoying golden oldies from days of old, but he didn't. He stood up for justice, integrity, accountability and for the downtrodden without fear or favor, even to the extent of risking his own safety on many occasions.

Through all the challenges he has encountered in his life, he has never ever wavered from the cause or the course that he chose to walk. His latest posting exudes a sense of serenity and calmness that only one close to the Almighty can possess. Not one to be vanquished or threatened, Uncle Bernard plods on with smiles on his face and a deep sense of camaraderie with his supporters and beloved friends who are too many to list.

Many of us would agree that his incisive writing, witty headlines/quips, not forgetting the colorful illustrations reveal the many facets of his deep character, brilliant language/writing skills and perspective of issues. His fearlessness has won him many enemies and fans alike and one cannot help but marvel at the courage of this Malaysian who has walked so many different paths in life but in his senior years, chose to walk for Malaysia and all that is good within.

When I went through the valley of darkness in last November, Uncle Bernard was the one who called me EVERYDAY to see how I was coping and to encourage me to emerge from my grief and fretting. That is something that I will never forget till the day I die. I am forever indebted to him for his love, support and kindness. He wrote about my predicament and did the needful on three occasions and I will never forget his kindness or sensitivity to the situation and my feelings. I salute his patience with my irrational rants, emo outbursts and insecurities. Patiently, he allowed me to fumble and fall and was there to give me a gentle push and prod to push me out of my cesspool of worry. It was not words of condemnation that he imparted but words which built me within and after a while, he took a step back. Thanks to him and a few close friends, I survived, Gloria Gaynor style!

Today, I am very sad that I cannot go down to KL to be with him and the others when he turns up for his date at Bukit Perdana at 3 p.m. for a Malaysian afternoon tête-à-tête with his 'hosts'. But I would greatly encourage the rest of you who are in the vicinity to turn up as a show of solidarity for this man who walked the extra mile many times for Malaysians.

I hope the rest of us who cannot be there for one reason or another can support him in prayer to ask the Almighty to continue to bless Uncle Bernard with peace, joy, courage and favor with les hommes dans bleu at Bukit Perdana.

Uncle Bernard, we are standing with you and behind you!!! For all that you have done for me, for Malaysia and all that you hope and dream to do - we love and respect you!!!

God bless you Uncle Bernard!!!

MID-WEEK JOKES SPECIALLY FOR YOU

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 02:30:00 +0000

A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach contemplating how badly treated she got over the divorce settlement, when she spies a magic lamp washing up onshore. She rubs the lamp, and out pops a magical genie!!

The genie notices her anger and lets her vent her troubles to him. As a consolation, the genie informs her that he will give her three wishes. But, he cautions her that because he does not believe in divorce, he will give her ex-husband ten times the
amount of whatever she wishes.

The woman is steaming mad, thinking that this is hardly fair, but she makes her first wish. The first wish was for a billion dollars. The genie grants her wish and she finds herself sitting in pile of one billion one-dollar bills.

The genie then reminds her that her husband is now the recipient of 10 billion dollars.

The woman can barely contain her anger when she makes her second wish. The second wish was for a beautiful mansion on the shore of her own private beach. In an instant it was granted, but the genie then reminds again that her ex-husband now owns ten of what she wished for, and points out at the beach to a small development of ten such mansions.

Upon hearing this, the woman takes her time to contemplate her last wish. Just as the genie was about to give up on her, the woman informs the genie that she wants to make the last wish. But, before she can do this, the genie again warns her that her ex-husband will get ten times what she wishes for.

"No problem," said the woman as she grinned in ecstasy. "For my last wish...I'd like to give birth to twins."
----------------------------

Irresistible To Women

A man is walking down the beach and comes across an old bottle. He picks it up, pulls out the cork and out pops a genie. The genie says "Thank you for freeing me from the bottle. In return I will grant you three wishes."

The man says "Great. I always dreamed of this and I know exactly what I want. First, I want 1 Billion dollars in a Swiss bank account."

Phoof! There is a flash of light and a piece of paper with account numbers appears in his hand. He continues, "Next, I want a brand new red Ferrari right here."

Phoof! There is a flash of light and a bright red brand-new Ferrari appears right next to him. He continues, "Finally, I want to be irresistible to women."

Phoof! There is a flash of light and he turns into a box of chocolates.

-------------------------

The Brain

In the Hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.

"I'm afraid I am the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces, "The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, semi-risky, and you will have to pay for the brain yourselves."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"

The Doctor quickly responded, "$5000 for a male brain, and £200 for a female brain."

The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile,avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.

A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?"

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and then to the entire group said, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've been used."

*No offense meant to men - this is solely for laughs*
----------------------------------

Playing Mummy And Daddy

Little Johnny rushes home from school. He invades the fridge and is scooping out some cherry vanilla ice cream when his mother enters the kitchen. She says, "Put that away, Little Johnny. You can't have ice cream now. It's too close to supper time. Go outside and play."

Little Johnny whimpers and says, "There's no one to play with."

Trying to placate him, she says, "OK. I'll play with you. What do you want to play?"

"I wanna play 'Mummy and Daddy,'" Little Johnny whines in reply.

Trying not to register surprise, and to further appease him, she says, "Fine, I'll play. What do I do?"

Little Johnny says, "You go up to the bedroom and lie down as if you're taking a nap."

Figuring that she can easily control the situation, Mum goes upstairs. Little Johnny, acting a bit cocky, swaggers down the hall and opens the utility closet. He puts on his fathers old fishing hat. As he starts up the stairs, he notices a cigarette butt in the ashtray on the end table. He picks it up and slips it in the corner of his mouth. At the top of the stairs he moves to the bedroom doorway. His mother raises her head and asks, "What do I do now?"

In a gruff manner, Little Johnny says, "Get your ass downstairs and get that kid some ice cream!"

-----------------------------------------

HOW TO SATISFY A WOMAN

Caress, praise, pamper, relish, savor, massage, make plans, fix, empathize, serenade, compliment, support, feed, tantalize, bathe, humor, placate, stimulate, jiffylube, stroke, console, purr, hug, cuddle, excite, pacify, protect, phone, correspond, anticipate, nuzzle, smooch, toast, minister to, forgive, sacrifice for, ply, accessorize, leave, return, beseech, sublimate, entertain, charm, lug, drag, crawl, show equality for, spackle, oblige, fascinate, attend, implore, bawl, shower, shave, trust, grovel, ignore, defend, coax, clothe, brag about, acquiesce, aromatize, fuse,
fizz, rationalize, detoxify, sanctify, help, acknowledge, polish,upgrade, spoil, embrace, accept, butter-up, hear, understand, jitterbug, locomote, beg, plead, borrow, steal, climb, swim, nurse, resuscitate, repair, patch, crazy-glue, respect, entertain, calm, allay, kill for, die for, dream of, promise, deliver, tease,
flirt, commit, enlist, pine, cajole, Anglicize, murmur, snuggle, snoozle, snurfle, elevate, enervate, alleviate, spotweld, serve, rub, rib, salve, bite, taste, nibble, gratify, take her places, scuttle like a crab on the ocean floor of her existence, diddle, doodle, hokey-pokey, hanky-panky, crystal blue persuade, flip, flop, fly, don't care if I die, swing, slip, slide, slather, mollycoddle, squeeze, moisturize, humidify, lather, tingle, slam-dunk, keep on rockin' in the free world, wet, slicken, undulate, gelatinize, brush, tingle, dribble, drip, dry, knead, fluff, fold, blue-coral wax, ingratiate, indulge, wow, dazzle, amaze, flabbergast, enchant, idolize and worship, and then go back, and start again.

HOW TO SATISFY A MAN
Show up naked with beer and food.

-----------------------------
You Can Almost Feel The Irony...

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation.

"How'd you die?" the first man asks the second.

"I froze to death," says the second.

"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"

"It's very uncomfortable at first", says the second man. "You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How about you, how did you die?"

"I had a heart attack," says the first man. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died."

The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic," he says.

"What do you mean?" asks the first man.

"If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive."
-----------------------------
*This selection is from the jokes that friends and readers sent to me over the past few months. Many thanks for sharing. *

HAVE A NICE DAY READERS!!!

THE ROAD AHEAD FOR US

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 11:30:00 +0000

Back in the 1970's, Diana Ross crooned the Theme Song from "Mahogany" known as "Do you know where you're going to?" which you can enjoy at THIS LINK while reading this post. Today, I would like to pose the same question to Malaysians.

Do YOU know where you're going where our nation is concerned? Have you given any thought about the road ahead? Have you given up hope and are you waiting in the shadows thinking that all will crumble and that nothing will ever put it back in order again? Have no fear...there IS hope after all despite the nonsense that we see before us.

Preamble

Before I attended the Sembang-Sembang Forum where Datuk Zaid Ibrahim and Dr. Mansor Othman, Penang Deputy Chief Minister I spoke about The Two-Party System in Malaysia, I had a very fuzzy vision of what lies ahead for my beloved country. Being a natural born pessimist converted to optimist through hard knocks in life, I oft wondered if things would be any better if the Opposition took over the reins of power. Too often, my heart did not leap for joy or in excitement in the light of the many depressing developments. Last night's forum, however, made a difference in my heart and I would like to share my perspectives with you.

From the minute he entered the hall that was filled with about 300 people, I was struck by Datuk Zaid Ibrahim's humble demeanour. It was the second time I came up close and personal with him and I knew deep in my heart there stands a man who lives by what he says and who speaks with much earnestness and sincerity. Similarly, Dr.Mansor had charisma and his smiling face throughout certainly reinforced the fact that this was the first time that a Deputy CM of Penang could sit so informally with the rakyat sharing his views and listening to us. Dr. Mansor, who holds a doctorate from Yale University, is definitely one leader who is down-to-earth with no airs! Click HERE for his biodata.

For the first time, I made 15 pages of notes at a forum. I have to confess that I usually carry a book with me just in case....and last night, I had Kurt Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse Five" in my bag and I did not have to read it at all but was instead, making notes furiously till I came home with cramps in my arm. Enough said. Allow me to give you a brief run-down of the forum.

Dr. Mansor Othman

He began his speech with a brief chronological development of Malaysia and how a loose pact between DAP, PAS and PKR was formed in 1998 following a crisis in the ruling party. That marked the beginning of new politics - a strong shift from communal politics for this time, it was a pact based on mutual need. Following the disastrous 2004 elections, the Opposition scored a political tsunami in 2008.

He gave a few reasons for this:

a) Fundamental levels of understanding had changed and the salient point was that political change can only come about with political reform via a two-party system where people have a clear choice of one out of two parties.

b) There is a need for the government to be more responsive to the rakyat in terms of the delivery system to put an end to injustice and corruption. As such, change is inevitable.

Datuk Zaid Ibrahim's Speech

Following this segment, Datuk Zaid Ibrahim gave his speech which I posted earlier at THIS LINK. I am not going to repeat contents from his speech but wish to highlight some of the issues raised during the forum.

* Anti-hopping law

Datuk Zaid reminded us that currently, there is no anti-hopping law in our country and that anyone can jump from one party to another. One can’t stop a person from joining whoever they want but on the other hand; one must respect the citizens of the country who have voted one particular group to power. For further reading, please read this excellent article in the Malaysian Bar website over AT THIS LINK.

He said that if and when Pakatan Rakyat comes to power, they will respect that a candidate won because of a particular party's platform

* Two-Party System

Most importantly, Datuk Zaid opened a small window for us to see how the three component parties are working together for a Common Policy Framework in the event that they take over the helm of government. He did not go into detail for obvious reasons but it was most comforting to listen to the many assurances that he gave the crowd pertaining to some of the common doubts expressed about the system.

The basic premise is that people have to be given a choice - one that is either good or bad. People need to realize that we need sound policies to understand what are the aims of Pakatan Rakyat. In reality, there are differences but the parties concerned are frank with each other and work on the basis of consensus in order to have unity to work out problems on a common platform. With the analogy of a marital relationship, Datuk Zaid reassured us that no one party is dominant and each component needs the others in order to function effectively.

He emphasized that PAS has to go beyond Islamic rhetoric to frame their policies in an acceptable way to other communities in order to generate the support that is needed to win the next election. In other words, it is how we skin the cat to get the vote to form the next government! He stressed that a totalitarian government that has their own understanding of the law MUST go. If there is such a situation where money politics is not recognized as such and where different concepts mean different things to different people at different times, then something is seriously wrong and as the rakyat, it is up to us to do something about it and up to the other concerned leaders to do likewise.

He outlined some main points re an upright government:

* a government that is consistent in its policies
* a government that is truthful, decent and transparent

Most importantly, the government must engage its citizens.

Datuk Zaid acknowledged that there whilst there are differences, all have to change to accommodate each other and to exercise tolerance. At the same time, he advised us not to underestimate UMNO as all are not on a level playing field. Most importantly, he correctly identified the existence of FEARS in the hearts and minds of the rakyat which had been planted there by our enemies and exhorted us all to exorcise those fears if we want to defeat the status quo.

Following this, in the Q & A session, Dr. Mansur Othman stressed that if the rakyat collectively want good governance, they must be prepared to change and to go beyond the next level of March 2008. Dr. Mansur explained how the present Penang saved RM20 million by NOT travelling first class when flying but they travel economy class. With this savings of RM20 million, the state government designed a policy to return the $$ to the rakyat whereby each citizen above the age of 60 years will be given 100RM a year to teach society to respect their elders. At the same time, come March 2010, they will implement a policy whereby 1000RM welfare payment will be given to the families of the elderly to help ease the burden of funeral expenses.

In the pipeline if Pakatan comes to power would be a comprehensive review of education policies to put standards in place and to give states more power and control over institutions of higher learning. Total reform is badly needed.

Since Datuk Zaid is a true blue Kelantanese, he gave a run-down of how PAS won the confidence of the Chinese with all the positive changes that they had brought to Kelantan and the tolerance they have shown to the Chinese there. For instance, there is a mosque in Rantau Panjang which has Chinese architecture and there are also many religious statues in the state. Such trends show that there is tolerance and that there can be positive changes in the future.

He also said that if Pakatan Rakyat come to power, there will be efforts to improve the administrative and judicial system. Efforts will be made to appoint judges who have caliber. The quality of people must be enhanced and to that end, they will try to restore trust but trust needs time to be embraced. Datuk Zaid also said that the Common Policy Framework encompasses many areas which are being discussed at party level and which cannot be revealed. What he assured the crowd last night was the fact that Pakatan Rakyat is serious about enforcing good policies and to find good leaders who are smart, experienced to be the right political leaders for our nation.

I don't know about the others, but when I left the forum last night, I was filled with a deep sense of peace knowing that it is not all hot air in the Pakatan Rakyat. True, there are cracks. No one is perfect - the same applies for political parties. Beyond the imperfections, we have to see that we definitely need an alternative government in a two-party system to ensure that the ruling government does not become one that is totalitarian or authoritarian or dictatorial or arrogant or corrupt etc. I am sure you get my drift.

It is my sincere prayer that somehow, somewhere, some time in the future, there will come a time when this nation has a two-party system in place and many of the woes and issues that we see before us will be in the past as new leaders propel us forward.

Malaysians, this is where I hope we are going.....Do you hope the same? Let's hope for the best in the road ahead. It may be a long and winding one but one worth taking. Will you join me in hoping for a two-party system?

DATUK ZAID IBRAHIM'S SPEECH - FORUM

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 05:34:00 +0000

Dear reader, This is the full text of Datuk Zaid Ibrahim's speech on the Two-Party System which was delivered last night at Sembang-Sembang Forum, Kompleks Penyayang Pulau Pinang. My post on this forum will be up later. This is a must read for all who love Malaysia. Thanks to Seng Hai who gave me this speech via email and thanks to the organisers and YB Sim Tze Yin who organized this event. Have a nice day folks!

If you want to read it in another format, please CLICK HERE or the full screen format at THIS LINK, both available at my Scribd account.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

INTRODUCTION

Ladies and Gentlemen. Thank you for inviting me to speak this evening on a very important subject; that is the prospect of a two-party system for Malaysia.

A two-party system is one where two major parties or two major grouping of political parties dominate the voting in an election, at all levels. The obvious examples are Labour vs. Conservatives in Britain; the Moderate Justice party with Islamic roots vs. the secular westernised grouping in Turkey; and the Republicans vs. the Democrats in America. The two-party system is the outcome of an evolutionary process where the main political players gravitate towards a common political philosophy. Ultimately, we discern in most countries the creation of two separate groups that are philosophically distinguishable. So one can say that Labour is more oriented to the centre left with strong union and workers affiliation whereas the Conservatives are more right wing and more averse to Big Government. Most importantly, both parties represent the interest of all segments of society.

Malaysia has never been short of having an Opposition. But some parties in the Opposition got offers that were too good to refuse and joined the Barisan Nasional and one point or the other in our short history. These are political parties from Sabah and Sarawak. We have also an Islamic Opposition Party in the shape of PAS and a secular Opposition Party in the shape of DAP but only Malays would support PAS, and mainly non-Malays would support DAP. So Opposition parties thus far continue to be segmented, are not broad-based, and have narrow communal appeal. This helps to justify the authoritarianism of UMNO, in the name of ensuring that an acceptable coalition to all communities remains in power. That’s why the BN has ruled for 52 years.

But it is time for a change.

It is time for us to have two-party system/coalition ala Malaysia. In which both sides are equally appealing to all communities in Malaysia. On one side the Barisan Nasional, and on the other side the Pakatan Rakyat. And both have to be as strong and representative as each other. But a Pakatan Coalition is different from the BN and in a most significant way. BN is nothing more than an UMNO hegemony supported by the wealthy Chinese and Indian upper class. Pakatan, on the other hand, is a people’s pact where its component parties - the PKR, PAS and DAP - stand together as equals. UMNO can dictate what peace means in MCA and who becomes its Deputy President but the parties in Pakatan have no direct influence over one another, other than through discourse and discussions. Consensus is the way for Pakatan, directives and orders are the way of the BN.

Of course in our country the process of a two-party grouping is in its infancy. Before the 2008 General Election the presence of Opposition parties was minimal in Parliament. Now the Opposition has 82 seats out of 222; it’s a big step forward but it’s still a long way from reaching the magic figure for them to govern. We all know that the Opposition pact today is fragile and some people have described them as a one-term wonder. This is mainly due to the constant bickering in public between the parties and also internal disagreements over policies and political ideology. Some bloggers have questioned the leadership and quality of leaders in the Opposition. The recent spat between PAS spiritual leader Nik Aziz and its party president is not helpful but having said that some changes need to be made to strengthen the Coalition and if it means having a public spat is the way to do it, then so be it, we will accept that.

Whatever the weakness of the Opposition parties, or our expectations of them, I would like to appeal to the public to continue to support the Opposition. A weakened Opposition will ensure continued authoritarian and corrupt rule, and we must not let that happen. On the other hand the problems facing the Opposition parties are surmountable. “We can work it out!” as the Beatles would say. I am optimistic because I am close enough to them to know that some of the problems simply stem from a lack of engagement with each other. Other reasons being that our political parties do not devote that much time and energy on policy deliberations, whether amongst their members or with their partners. But I’m sure that much of these problems can be solved in due course, if we are able to spend more time talking to each other.

Confusion will reign when previously separate parties come to power as a coalition. Hassan Ali probably thinks not selling beer in some areas in Selangor is actually a good social policy. So he thinks it’s a PAS policy that he seeks to implement and therefore he was prepared to ride roughshod over the Menteri Besar who is not from his party. If PAS has a clear social policy to discourage alcoholism and dependency amongst youth on alcohol and drugs, for example, and such policy is discussed within the framework of a Coalition then a more enlightened and less threatening policy can be implemented. PAS has a commitment to the Federal Constitution; the issue is merely how to tailor its social and moral policy accordingly. Engagement and public discourse is the way politics work in a democratic system and that must be respected. I don’t think we want or need a strong theocratic movement to contend with within the Opposition, always at odds with its partners. For that, my friends, will be the end of the Pakatan Rakyat.

Public discourse and engagement will instead get the people’s support and at the same time showcase to the public that the Pakatan is a group of thinking politicians who can formulate good policies and who care about the community. Not a group of reforming zealots who use religion as an excuse to deny others of their lifestyle and freedom.

The case of Zulkifli Noordin putting forward suggestions to ban condom sales and to include the syariah as part of the Federal Constitution is another example where his party (and mine too!) spends little time making clear their political stance on many so-called sensitive issues. This fuzziness and lack of commitment to a clearly defined policy in PKR allows characters like Zulkifli to champion his cause, whatever that might be. He, like Hassan Ali, knows he is not going to be disciplined because he suspects his own party has not made a categorical stance on the nature of the Federal Constitution. In the absence of such a position, it’s open to Zukifli to want to promote his version of an Islamic State where the syariah rules supreme. He is not alone. Dr Mahathir Mohamad too has declared Malaysia to be an Islamic State, although his own understanding of that concept I suspect is different from Zulkifli Noordin.

So it appears to me that the three parties in the Opposition have to spend time together to deliberate on a Common Policy Framework. They must first agree on these matters with their own party members and then move forward together as a Coalition. They must be clear of the key policy areas they wish to adopt and what they want to do when in power. They must abandon their suspicion of one another and not only be interested in maximising their party’s seat allocation in the next election. They must put their best people forward if they harbour any hope of changing the government.

I am fortunate to have been given the role of facilitating policy discussions amongst the three parties. I will continue to offer suggestions that hopefully they will accept to bring strength and depth to the Opposition. The Opposition has to speak on major issues with one voice, and with promptness and decisiveness. The public will not accept in the future knee-jerk and populist posturing from Pakatan leaders. They want to know where we stand. And they must rein in and discipline without fear or favour those within their parties who choose to disrespect the Pakatan’s Common Policy Framework.(CPF)

The CPF will undoubtedly require sacrifice on all sides. They must be willing to depart from their present position, or the presentation of those positions, to gain support. PAS and PKR must recognise and respect the sanctity of religious freedom. They must recognise in the constitutional sense the limited role of Islam as the country’s official religion. Limited, in the sense that Islam is a matter of state laws and the states can only legislate on matters relating to the precepts of Islam. Limited, in the sense that these laws must not violate the Federal Constitution. What is the limit imposed by the Constitution must be deliberated and discussed and finally accepted. It’s this acceptance that will distinguish those who want to live in a democracy under a written Constitution from those who want a religious theocracy.

PAS should not strive to enforce compliance but instead seek acceptance of its policies by consent and genuine support. Its religious platform should be modelled on social and moral premises that are acceptable to many religious faiths. A dynamic social and moral policy will be more acceptable; in fact it is very much needed in the present times of drugs dependency and a fragile social fabric. PAS’ moral policy must take cognisance of common values amongst people of different faiths, must articulate about family values and about stable social order. That is the only way PAS can further its religious agenda without harming its support amongst all Malaysians. PAS must accept that the laws and policies of the country are all interconnected. Any law even if its applicability is confined to Muslims has grave implications and consequence to non-Muslims. We live in a multi-religious country. We live in an interconnected world. To live in harmony, laws and policies must emanate from the consent of the governed. Laws must be discussed and deliberated before they are enacted. The citizens, who belong to all faiths, will then accept just laws irrespective of their source.

This is the meaning of the expression “to abide by the Federal Constitution.” This is the meaning of accepting the Constitution as the highest law of the land, which PAS has done so in its manifesto.

Penang is a DAP fortress so I have to be careful of what I say about the DAP. DAP too must recognise the importance of affirmative action as a tool to help reduce the economic gaps between communities. DAP too must accept that the economic gaps between the Chinese and other bumiputras and natives are wide. There is therefore a need to provide special assistance to these bumiputras, even to the Indians and the Orang Asli. DAP must work harder to shed its image as a Chinese party in that it must be more visible as a champion of other communities’ interests too. The powerful Chinese business community must reach out to help build the businesses of the other communities as well. There are many programmes that can be undertaken to show solidarity of the Pakatan.

We need to show that Pakatan is about the well being of the people, not about big business, not about promoting conglomerates and monopolies, but about giving the opportunity to all Malaysians to be successful in business and making a head start in life. Business skill and experience can be shared. A richer and more equitable economic system will benefit all communities. There are enough in the country for the people to share if only we can stop the massive corruption and wastage perpetuated by the present government. I am saying all these as a friend and such changes will be better for the DAP in the long run.

If we in the Opposition remain disunited, ideologically at odds with each other, and unable to parade capable and scandal free leaders, to inclusively represent all communities in Malaysia in a complementary way, then the abuse of power, endemic corruption and nationalist extremism we are experiencing today will remain because BN will continue to rule.

As such, we in the Pakatan have initiated a process of change. The registration of Pakatan Rakyat as a single party/coalition has been agreed to in principle. I am now sorting out the details. The Common Policy Framework has also been circulated to the three parties. It’s my hope and that of many that we will overcome all obstacles and have a successful Convention in December.

I have been brutally honest about the Pakatan’s problems. Allow me the indulgence of being just as honest about the BN and why if you keep voting BN as it is today, yesterday and tomorrow, Malaysians will lose out.

Many people still believe that only, UMNO by way of the Barisan Nasional, can offer a workable power-sharing leadership to run this nation and to prevent infighting from factionalism and racial polarisation. But this is a dangerous delusion. In fact, it is these beliefs that are at the centre of UMNO’s political hegemony. This self-indulgent sense of indispensability and self-importance is causing them to steer the nation to an authoritarian rule. . It is this that has helped justify in their minds their right to quell any one who threatens the status quo, whether it is a group of politicians or activists protesting against abuses in government, or a group of Indians protesting against their treatment and lack of opportunities.

The PM, or as some of his admirers would say the Thinking PM, says his government is not a racist government. He might just as well add that his government is also not a fascist one. After all BN and UMNO have a different understanding from the rakyat on the more important terms and precepts. Like corruption in UMNO is not corruption but money politics, like gratification and bribery under the Election Offences are not applicable to UMNO Ministers. And if bribery to the voters does not produce the desired result, then just bribe the people’s elected representatives. Also in Malaysia separation of powers means state legislatures can take over by force, as was the case in Perak. In most democracies an independent Election Commission is the final determinant of whether there is a vacancy in the State of Federal legislature but not in 1Malaysia. In this wonderland one can give any description or interpretation to fit one’s political agenda. Whatever the description one gives to our country the fact remains that today the rudiments of democracy are dead and gone. We live in a country where the underlying philosophy is the glorification of the PM and the subordination of the individual to the authority of the government, and where the suppression of dissent is harsh. We live in a country where UMNO is the law, or as King Louis IV says, “C’est a la moi..” I am the law.

What is the price that we ultimately pay as a nation, if this disease is not addressed? Clearly to start with, we would continue to be cursed with a non-transparent government without the capability of functioning in a way that respects the rule of law: a government that condones abuse of power; a government ruled by a group of oligarchs whose economic interests will supersede that of the rakyat; and a government whose economic policy favours the monopolists and big businesses.

If the public believes that the government is not beholden to a set of commonly revered values and principles, and its actions are tainted by racial biases, there will continue to be physical and emotional segregation of communities, regardless of what is done to break such divisiveness. Our economy too will suffer.

The ultimate price that the country suffers from the present political culture of the BN is that that Malays and non-Malays will continue to be denied a common sense of ownership of Malaysia’s nation-building journey. The Sabahans and Sarawakians will never feel they belong to Malaysia. And instead of becoming partners in this voyage to mature nationhood they will continue to bicker and remain suspicious and distrustful of one another. And there will continue to be a brain drain of Malaysian talents who would have decided that they would rather make their home elsewhere. And there will be further exodus of capital and brainpower that this government will not be able to stop. This is a high price that the country can ill-afford to pay given the increasingly challenging global outlook.

Authoritarianism, patronage, and nationalist extremism from any quarter destroy the key ingredients necessary for the Malaysian community to really build on and retain that wealth and knowledge. True economic and scholastic success and competitiveness is a function of instilling in the hearts and minds of beneficiaries a set of new behaviours, around the capacity and desire to take personal accountability, to trust one another, to be achievement oriented, to develop a sense of curiosity, a sense a solidarity that goes beyond your own ethnic clans and groups; so that together we are able to build this country together. We must do away with unprincipled politics and with Machiavellian methods, and instead seek to change with reforms that encourage the development of a viable democracy and a prosperous country for all.

So the people of this country must decide what kind of Government they want. And the country that our grandchildren will inherit. I believe the majority want a country and a system that will restore faith and hope for a united country. Not the slogan and hype of 1Malaysia but that of abiding unity based on respect, trust and recognition that all Malaysians are equal irrespective of ethnicity, religion or region. We want a country that will ensure the best possible future for all Malaysians and a government that will practice good economics, uphold democracy and the Rule of Law. We want a government that promotes a Malaysian mindset change, premised on personal accountability, rational and independent thinking, hard work and a sense of fair play.

If we want all of the above then the only option available to the well-meaning people of this country is to work hard towards a stronger, united and more cohesive Opposition parties that can, given the mandate, become an alternative Federal Government. A former PM has said that the Opposition would be the ruin of this country. I beg to differ. Only a united and credible Opposition can save this country. The growth of anything new comes not without pain and uncertainty. So will it be with the Pakatan Rakyat. The road to success is not without its trials and tribulations. And success comes not without hard work, not without courage and not without hope.

Ladies and gentlemen,
The only way to have leaders who are accountable for their actions, to have fair and just system and good governance is to have a strong alternative choice that can compete toe to toe with Barisan Nasional and can act as an effective check and balance. It’s therefore imperative that we move towards a two-party system.
Let us not shy away from the hard work that is to come. Let us not lose hope. Pakatan will succeed.

Thank you.

WHAT YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT WOMEN - jokes

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 03:00:00 +0000

One day a passenger plane on a cross-country trip runs into a terrible storm. The plane gets pounded by rain, hail, wind and lightning. The passengers are screaming. They are sure the plane is going to crash and that they are all going to die.

At the height of the storm, a young woman jumps up and exclaims, "I can't take this anymore! I can't just sit here and die like an animal, strapped into a chair. If I am going to die,let me at least die feeling like a woman. Is there anyone here man enough to make me feel like woman?"

She sees a hand raised at the back of the plane. A muscular man starts to
walk up to her seat. As he approaches her, he takes off his shirt.

She can see the man's muscles even in the poor lighting of the plane. He stands in front of her, shirt in hand and says to her, "I can make you feel like a woman before you die. Are you interested?"

Eagerly, she shakes her head, Yes!

As the man hands her his shirt, he says, "Here. Iron this."

-----------------------------------------------------

UNFORGETTABLE QUOTES FROM FAMOUS WOMEN

* I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. - Marie Corelli

* Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths. - Baroness Edith Summerskill

* If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck? -Linda Ellerbee

* I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. -Zsa Zsa Gabor

* I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde. - Dolly Parton

* When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

* Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. - Maryon Pearson

* I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch. - Gilda Radner

* In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

* I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine
marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinhem

* Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. - Glori
Steinhem

* You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

* I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours. -Rita Rudner

* My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

* I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

* Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

* If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing 'em. - Sue Grafton

* I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. - Roseanne Barr

* I think, therefore I'm single. - Lizz Winstead

------------------------------------------
What I Want In A Man, ORIGINAL List
-----------------------------------
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially Successful
4. A Caring Listener
5. Witty
6. In Good Shape
7. Dresses with Style
8. Appreciates the Finer Things
9. Full of Thoughtful Surprises
10. An Imaginative, Romantic Lover

What I Want In A Man, REVISED List
----------------------------------
1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Works steady
4. Doesn't nod off while I'm emoting
5. Usually remembers the punchlines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat lid down
10. Shaves on weekends

HAVE A NICE DAY!!!

PENANGITES - WE'VE GOT A DATE TONIGHT

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 19:10:00 +0000

Please make yourself free if you are in Penang tonight. We've got a VIA (Very Important Appointment) with Datuk Zaid Ibrahim, coordinator of Pakatan Rakyat to form a formal coalition for the Pakatan who will be speaking on the Two-Party System for Malaysia at Kompleks Penyayang from 8.30p.m. to 10.30p.m. tonight.

The formation of Pakatan Rakyat as a legal entity will mark the beginning of a two-party system in Malaysia. There will emerge a multiracial mass-based political coalition capable of challenging and replacing the Barisan National as the government of Malaysia.

Such a two-party system will offer a more level field for political competition in Malaysia, provide better representation of the interests of the rakyat, expand the democratic spaces necessary to protect of the rights of the people, and at the same time force the implementation of the much overdue reforms in the Barisan National which has so far refused to listen to the people as it holds on to its monopoly of power at the central level.

Efforts of Datuk Zaid Ibrahim in forming a legal entity for Pakatan Rakyat can be seen as a first step towards the realization of the two-party System for Malaysia.

This forum is part of The Sembang-Sembang Forum organized by YB Sim Tze Tzin (Adun, Pantai Jerejak which takes place at the beginning of each month.

Sembang-Sembang means having casual conversations. After the presentation by the speakers, participants will be invited to ask questions and they can also offer their views and suggestion on the subject being addressed.

This free flow of exchanging ideas will help us achieve a better understanding of the issues. With this, it is hoped that mutual understanding amongst the different ethnic communities within Malaysia will be promoted.

The organizers also feel that such social issues can be better understood if we examine these issues through a free and open discussion as we are a multi-racial, multi-religious, multi-cultural and multi-sectoral society.

Through attaining a common understanding on such social issues, we hope that a consensus can be reached and any proposed solutions can be acceptable to most, if not all, Malaysians.

Mari-lah sembang-sembang! Come, let's sembang!

Let us better understand one another so that we can build a Malaysia that is just, democratic, progressive and united.

PENANGITES/EVERYONE IN PENANG - WE'VE GOT A DATE TONIGHT!! SEE YOU THERE!!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*This post was written based on the information from THIS LINK. I hope to see as many of you there as possible. Do try to be early to avoid parking problems. Thank you.

THE ART OF WINDOW DRESSING

noreply@blogger.com (masterwordsmith) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 01:22:00 +0000

It seems there is a lot of hot air over both new and old public issues to the extent that it appears that the government are doing much in the name of unity, efficiency and integrity and yet NOTHING in real terms. Let's view these issues.

1. RM28 billion through excessive payments for contracts and procurements

In response to the revelation about the massive losses, our Prime Minister announced:

A high-powered task force will be set up immediately to scrutinise wrongdoings reported in the recently-released Auditor-General’s Report, said Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak.

This is to ensure that those involved in any misappropriation of funds or abuse of power would not “get away with it” but face the consequences. To read the rest of the article, CLICK HERE.

What really irks me in this report would be the following statements:

a) The Cabinet felt that serious action against those involved was needed to ensure that matters like abuse of power and misappropriation did not repeatedly appear in the annual report, he told a special press conference in announcing the setting up of the task force here yesterday.

Why are investigations on the way only after a colossal loss of RM28BILLION when such revelations from the Auditor-General have been common occurrences yearly? How do you feel about this, dear reader?

b)“They will not necessarily face legal action. They might face administrative action like surcharge, demotion, having their promotions frozen or be transferred,” Najib said.

In the private sector, the culprits would be history with CBT charges and the whole works! This a slap on the wrist is definitely no deterrent and will encourage such acts to persist. After all, they can and will get away with it.

c) Najib also said the Government would be fair and act compassionately if there were mitigating factors that led to the actions of the offenders.

SPEECHLESS!!

RM28billion lost and we are talking about COMPASSION!!!

These thieves who have stolen $$$ from our very pockets are to be treated with kid's gloves?

Where is the compassion for the rakyat who daily have to face increased prices of goods and services and a shrinking ringgit in our wallets?

So many contradictions. Earlier, he said that SERIOUS ACTION was needed.

New equation in Malaysia ~ SERIOUS ACTION = COMPASSION = WOW!!

Please read A-G’s report leaves many to ponder if anything has changed through the years.

d) More contradictory statements from the same article:

Later, Sidek said the task force would make sure that those who deliberately did not follow the rules were brought to book.

He said this was part of the Government’s efforts in enforcing existing rules and regulations.

Another case of the left hand not knowing what the right hand is doing - this time, at the same function.

Hello! I thought enforcement and regulation of procedures are part and parcel of everyday operational requirements in ANY organization????

Feeling angry now?

2. Bridge Collapse and National Service

STOP MESSING AROUND WITH OUR CHILDREN!!!!

a) Such programs were launched in the name of unity but to what purpose? These children have had to pay with their lives for the irresponsible acts of certain group so that the gravy train can......

1Malaysia camps - Three innocent girls died. Why target primary school kids? I discussed this in my post COLLAPSE!!

Children are innocent. Let the rebel rouser leaders attend these camps!

The problem of disunity can never be solved as long as we have leaders who show their arrogance and insensitivity to people's feelings and religious beliefs (e.g. cow-head incident). All leaders should be put into such camps where they can be taught the Rukunegara so that RM28 billion can be rightfully spent on the rakyat! Currently, KPI of most leaders seems is 1 out of 10. In private sector, these leaders would have been history.

National Service -Why subject youths to this program? More than 16 have died. I could not get the latest statistics (could someone help me please?)

What has been the outcome? From 2004 to 2008, there have been increasing cases of missing trainees, food poisoning, assault, rape, fever etc. Please CLICK HERE for detailed reports.

Apart from all these mishaps and illnesses, don't forget that those youths who went for National Service had to face delays in their entrance to programs at tertiary level or even work opportunities.

Please remember the amount spent so far on National Service (and don't forget to add in the RM28BILLION loss per year plus expenditure for other white elephant programs and also the amount of money spent on open houses and other task forces to investigate issues).

For your information (extracted from THIS LINK)

Budget and Spending

Trainees were initially given a RM300 allowance by the government. Beginning in January 2008, this amount has been raised to RM150/month, or RM450 total.[6] Trainee allowances come in the form of a Sijil Simpanan Premium (Premium Savings Certificate) from Bank Simpanan Nasional, or an account with Bank Pertanian Malaysia. The accounts with Bank Pertanian Malaysia have been criticized for taking out RM 20 from each account, for processing and ATM card fees.

According to Deputy Defence Minister Datuk Wira Abu Seman Yusop, RM2.37 bil has been spent to finance the national service (NS) programme since 2004. RM608.6mil was spent in 2004, RM604.8mil in 2005, RM588.2mil in 2006 and RM565mil in 2007. Defence Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak had said earlier that the programme would not exceed RM500mil a year.

3. Changes in educational policies and the ongoing debates about:

* BM to English medium for the teaching of Science and Mathematics and vice versa
* Vernacular schools - please CLICK HERE for the latest report

Again the government cannot decide on the educational policies and go to and fro and those affected are lost in a maze of indecisions? Most frustrating!

4. BIRO TATA 1Malaysia Courses

Did you know this (extracted from THIS LINK)?

Biro Tatanegara (National Civics Bureau) is set to organise courses and seminars to explain 1Malaysia for the people to better understand the concept introduced by Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak.

Deputy Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department Ahmad Maslan said the courses and seminars on 1Malaysia, with its slogan of “People First; Performance Now”, would be held at the “Bina Negara” (nation-building) camps nationwide.

“It cannot be denied that many people are still confused about the 1Malaysia concept,” he told reporters after visiting the National Civics Bureau office, here.

Ahmad, who is also Umno information chief, said the courses and seminars were expected to begin this year and employees of the public and private sectors were the main target groups.

He also said that a nation-building camp costing RM23 million in Sempadai, Lundu, near here, was expected to be completed in December. — Bernama

We know the covert aims of BTN, don't we?

The list is endless and the issues listed here are but the tip of the iceberg of many pressing issues that the rakyat have to contend with in their daily lives.

Why spend so much money on futile programs or complexes to build harmony, unity when we know who are creating disharmony, disunity and feelings of animosity in their speeches, actions or lack of it and other programs? All this is sheer insanity and carried out purely for window-dressing !

Singapore must be having a good chuckle at our expense. With no natural resources but well harnessed human resource, they have stepped up to become a developed nation. What have we to show??

Let's also not forget HOW MANY TASK FORCES, COMMITTEES AND INVESTIGATION TEAMS have been set up to investigate questionable practices, collapse of buildings or bridges etc. Findings are always later, preferably much later (and preferably forgotten). Click HERE to see an example.

There you are - with all these on our platter, Malaysia is doing very well. We are progressing economically. Reports say we should be out of recession but are we?

Do you see anything concrete for the rakyat? Or are some saying one thing and meaning the other?

It appears that some leaders have perfected the art of doing something achieving nothing.

Is this all not window dressing?