Diva Incarnate

Twitter Review: Madonna - Erotica (1992)

2012-01-25T05:29:00.000Z

Something I seem to do from time to time is pop an album on and post a tweet per track as a mini review (an activity I don't put much thought into, but enjoy an awful lot, just because it's simple and not like writing a conscious review at all). So whilst in terms of writing I don't have the time or focus to blog much, since I have a dissertation to do), I thought I would post some of my twitter mini reviews every so often, starting with Madonna's starkly intriguing masterpiece Erotica. Please also take on board that tweets really do carry their own irreverent tone and not meant to offend.

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Languorous, drowsy Secret Garden could very well be Saint Etienne. Can't give a higher compliment if I tried. Not one stinker on the album

7 Jan

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I remember using lyrics from the Erotica album in an English essay, aged 14. Madonna's love everyone agenda on this album really worked IMO

7 Jan

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AIDS downer In This Life is incredibly haunting I'm proud of her for writing about it. Almost too sad to listen to, but has a waltzing aroma

7 Jan

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"brothers, sisters" gets my neck snapping, privately. The whole thing is terrible embarrassing, yet inanely stylish. Delicious whingeing

7 Jan

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The undulating Why's It So Hard gets a hard time from its critics, Madonna goes Ace of Base. Tongue-curling whatdowhahavedododoberespected

7 Jan

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1 of the finest displays of her talents, Rain finally relents the tension. Characteristically expressive sleek stylish she surpasses herself

7 Jan

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Morbidly obsessed, overwhelmingly fragile. Words: strong choked-up verses, middle-8 that leaves the ground, chorus plays 2nd-fiddle to both

7 Jan

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It would be a divine treat for her to perform this on tour. My most wanted, absolutely. Campy, statuesque and aloof - the perfect M facade

7 Jan

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Starkly vulnerable bruised & rouged Thief of Hearts was the original Vanity but has depth & genuine merits not least its ice-cold pathos

7 Jan

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Locking into the groove, Waiting speaks under her breath. The rhythm experience is divine. Luscious Jackson with a boner

7 Jan

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VERY different to the image I must have had in my head. She was wearing clothes, glamorous and alcoholic. Pining in an almost funky manner

7 Jan

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The morning-after pill Bad Girl, my first concious and private witness of a Madonna video on the ITV Chart Show. I was impressed but it was

7 Jan

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Translating innuendos into heartfelt grooves, giving her the wrong exposure. Convincing songwriting, strong delivery, engaging. Life Begins

7 Jan

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The first of the drowsy after-hours jazz moments, Where Life Begins is years beyond the contemporary reaction to its lyrics.

7 Jan

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Deeper can't surpass Vogue; indeed it submits to it, as if adding fuel, by ordering "go with the flow". Maybe she just had a heavy period

7 Jan

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Deeper's sweeping disco, once again yearning for solutions regarding her mother and father. Throwing herself head first into love's excess

7 Jan

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Such stylistic shifts gave us Bye Bye Baby, a nice original stroke with the phone-call kiss-off. Deee-Lite's Call Me did the concept better

7 Jan

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Bittersweet, dance-inspired Fever moves elegantly, playfully, the voice is cool but melts like ice. It sort of just fits there, but rich

7 Jan

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Considered dated on it's arrival, Erotica's mumbles still breathe down my neck, I feel immobile to its commands.

7 Jan

Rating: 9/10

The Return of Betine Zetlitz

2012-01-19T15:13:00.001Z

Calling all electro gays and their admirers: it's time to lose your shit to the new Bertine track Electric Feet featuring Samsaya (think Madonna featuring M.I.A, but more chic). Sadly the link cannot be shared on blogger, or else I am not able to figure out how to do so. Instead, 'like' her page and hear it for yourself. Listen Here.

Freak Asylum - Album Sampler Review (2012)

2012-01-12T00:19:00.004Z

FREAK ASYLUM ALBUM TEASER MIX by freakasylum

Two well-established pros in the music business, Andy Lee and Kelly Llorenna, reinvent themselves as dance music’s new biggest threat Freak Asylum on their debut album Let The Madness Begin. The songs have a thrilling immediacy and their sense of all or nothing pays off in spades. Built on a sonic landscape of slick guitars and high-speed dance adrenaline, the music is slick, bulletproof and in hot pursuit of the charts.

With its knock-out chorus that’s as subtle as a tsunami, You Better Leave’s eager verses concentrate on a hostile romance: “and I’m scared, scared of what you’ll do to me” sounds more like a threat from Kelly and not the other way around. Because it’s so stylish and well-pasted together, the sounds are rich and tightly constructed into unabashed hyper-pop with electronic underpinnings.

Scandalously charged opener Something To Say spits a furious F-you to the haters and recalls Garbage with its huge dirty guitar riff that practically licks you on the face, and it’s inescapable chorus. Kelly’s earthy vocals compete confidently with such a beast of a track. The rabid force doesn’t relent; an array of illuminating rock and electronica sounds all fuses together to create the album’s highest voltage.

The distinct sense of accessible pop song-craft of the gutter-glam Wasted is tinged with melancholia and a wistful yearning, the chorus is swirling and (yet again) anthemic to the nth degree. The perfect soundtrack to waking up in a police cell with bits of kebab and condom packets stuck in your hair. We’ve all been there, no? Kelly's sensitive vocal control really showcases a more vulnerable side to her timbre, not to mention the gleaming production gloss. A serious single contender. I'm having palpitations for this one.

Future single Throwaway Girl is anything but disposable. Sultry and surly, think Rachel’s I Said Never Again, but with an 18 sticker.

Filth-fest Fetish oozes glamour from every pore: thrashing guitars, and Kelly’s cackling purr is fired up. The bursts of off-kilter momentum play to Kelly’s pugnacious strength, it’s the album’s loudest carnage. Snarling “yeah” sarcastically to the point of sounding violent.

Above: Kelly lezzing it up with a tranny, making lesbians wetter than Niagara Falls nationwide.

Draping the songs with guitars, the dance-injected pop-rock formula creates a brutal and bruising dancefloor experience, with many moments to admire. The songs are filled with hooks like it’s an addiction. Whatever they’re taking, Freak Asylum are well over the limit and will leave your ears ringing for more. The album’s consistency easily outmatches even the highest watermarks of either Kelly’s or Andy’s previous work. Aggressively pitched towards the club, their throbbing arousal for high-impact melodies are defined by an unwavering commitment to every song. The robust production fizz kicks into gear at every turn and Kelly’s ‘Lola Leethal’ persona loses none of her trademark steel-reinforced vox, completely in her element amongst the 'madness' of thumping rhythms and the glam-soaked euphoria. Do I sound like I love this or what?

Rating:

9/10

Ultimate Pop Star Countdown: 15-11

2011-12-02T22:13:00.001Z

11. Gina G - Ooh Ahh ... Just A Little Bit

From it’s immediately recognisable camp siren, it’s gushing sprint to articulate her groin-orientated feelings, and simultaneously the most embarrassing song to own up to loving (oh yes it is). My obsession with Gina just won’t ever diminish. The album was a total fluke of course, but it was near immaculate (only the soggy Missing You Like Crazy wasn’t invited to the party). Every track a dance-pop convulsion or ballad with a sleek and chic mid-tempo gloss, MYLK might only have been a remix away from sounding just as polished, but Fresh! is Gina getting to have her cake and eat it quite frankly - everything about the songs and presentation felt so ripe, the songs at their best are bursting with Gina's gushing lyrics and the fast-lane Motiv8/Metro production adrenaline. Album highlights include the swooning Ti Amo, rampant Rhythm of My Life ("my brother doesn't like you, my sister thinks your cool" is blurted out in typical blushing speeed from Gina), sumptuous I Belong To You, kitsch hollering of the title track, the emotional peak of It Doesn't Mean Goodbye, the flamenco-flutter of Everytime I Fall (although the essential versions are the Todd Terry pop radio edit and the Metro dance version), the euro-groove of Gimme Some Love, the fixated Hi-NRG mantra on the giddy head-spin of Higher Than Love and the floaty trance-wave of Follow The Light.

12. Dannii Minogue - All I Wanna Do

Dannii’s plaintive vocals and the majestic production splendour were something of a revalation for the then sibling-obscured Australian singer. Sultry self-loathing or just lust and morbid self-inspection – she is almost certainly singing this song to herself, a craving to connect and face rejections head on. After her remarkable make-over at the time, I imagine this must be what looking in the mirror must have felt like: so much wide-eyed marvel and euphoric stillness trying to convince or take it all in, but haunted by overwhelming disbelief. It’s a compelling lyric, and her finest composition to date. Aching for an illusion she seems to articulate an equal amount of contempt for ("I may not be the innocent girl that you wanted me to be"), and her confessional anguish might be restless but the delivery is remarkably poised and accomplished (not to mention deliciously cold in places), which creates a synergy between the internal themes she wrestles with. The appealing production is an illuminated cascade of graceful dance sounds - no other song on the album Girl quite matched this elaborate construction. The album's other highlights included the regal and orchestral Disremembrance (imagine Ladytron meets Whigfield), the low key Am I Dreaming that washes over you, Heaven Can Wait (this one sounds lifted from a 60s Dionne Warwick record, and also ignites into its definitive dance incarnation on the strident Trouser Enthusiasts remix), the ecstatic Movin' Up, giving Italian diva Alexia a run for her euro on the rampant piano stampede on Keep Up With The Good Times, the deliciously twisted post-divorce calculation of the dark speed-ballad So In Love With Yourself, and the introspective Everything I Wanted. However, the treacling and jubilant scintilation of the original 'Innocent Girl Mix' edit that appeared on the belated Unleashed collection, which remains the definitive Dannii long-player (somewhat ironically surpassing her botched greatest hits job with luxurious ease), has additional ad libs that are absolutely crushing in their prettiness and introduce new persuasive subtilties: coinciding with the drum and bass hurriedly splashing like water, spritzing synthesizers that beam like rays of sunlight, and swirling currents of indispensable 90s dance decadence par excellence creating the irresistible rippling charge, usurping melancholic momentum and optimum setting for Dannii's intriguing lyrical bite and enticingly expressive nasal-navigated vocal juice to truly shine.

13. Depeche Mode - Enjoy The Silence

The perfect pop song, drenched in gleaming synths, house music pumping galore, Dave's distilled drawl and impish beauty on the verge of destruction, the lingering backing vocal, world-weary verses, an awe-struck chorus that remains jaw-dropping in both its sheer intensity and simplicity, and not a second wasted.

14. Kim Wilde - Can You Hear It / You Came

You Came is her best full-pelt single, but the slinky ballad Can You Hear It has a sulky appeal washed into a mixture of regal nu-wave. Kim has a habit of blowing me away with her gentle serenades such as this, Thought It Was Goodbye and Someday.

15. Spice Girls - Move Over / Spice Up Your Life

Move Over, to me, is the blueprint for the style of No Good Advice, a chorus and spat out soundbites like graffiti. The most exciting time being a Spice Girls fan: anticipating THAT second album. I still know the dance routine to Spice Up Your Life and am only ever a full bottle of vodka away from proving it. Move Over was like their mission statement beyond being the Madonna’s next door girls or whatever.

Ultimate Pop Star Countdown: 20-16

2011-11-27T19:46:00.001Z

16. Prince – Gold

Quite grand and pompous, but it’s completely mesmerizing, a soft-rock renewal awash with pristine pop shimmers. It’s no surprise he covered Joan Osborne’s One of Us – they sort of (lyrically at least) burn from the same candle. That was NOT a waxing lyrical pun I promise.

17. Eurythmics – Beethoven (I Love To Listen)

Pyscho meets Donna Summer. From its violent throbbing intro, to the unhinged rapture of it all, lyrics splatter like blood and Annie’s razor-blade delirium would almost be upsetting if it weren’t so mind-blowing. The home-wrecker/home-maker violations and schizophrenia is rooted in glamour, angst and desperation: the manic, seething turbulence of Beethoven is such a dizzying height the album threatens to implode in itself on the very first track.

18. Billie Ray Martin – Hearts / Where Fools Rush In

Ambient and lush, Billie’s song is shy to be heard and ripples like the reflection of moonlight. Hushing “calm down” has to be the softest emotion I’ve ever heard from anyone’s voice.

19. Smashing Pumpkins – Perfect

Serene and pensive, Billy’s voice tenderly bristles and we even get to hear D’arcy. It’s hook is not as obvious as 1979, but their ink is leaking from the same pen.

20. Alexia – Uh La La La (Almighty UK Radio Edit)

Hearing this on the Pepsi Chart, and then changing channel to Radio 1’s own top 40 coundown straight away (there was always a 1 song delay between both), I was sure Alexia was Jocelyn Brown's 55 stone sister having the time of her life before having cardiac arrest. I wanted in on the fun. It actually came BEFORE Spice Up Your Life, a stampede of piano keys and a voice that sounded like she was bound to have lipstick on her teeth – loud, brassy and just fabulous.

Ultimate Pop Star Countdown: 25-21

2011-11-25T17:06:00.003Z

21. Vitamin C - Sex Has Come Between Us / Last Night

10 years too old. Poor Colleen, she made the best pop princess album of the naughties, but looked like Britney’s babysitter. The slightly morbid lust of Sex Has Come Between Us is slithery and agile enough to rival Holly Vallance’s State of Mind and B's In The Zone alike, and pre-dating them by nearly two years. The More album is an outstanding pop document. Last Night is of course the well scratched cover of The Strokes breakthrough hit put in the disco spin cycle with Blondie's Heart of Glass instrumental: utterly cheapskate but creates a high price tag for itself.

22. Alanis Morissette - Front Row / Thank U

Like having a million dictionaries thrown at you and being completely transfixed – like being in the chaos of someones dream. Thank U's unforgettable dangling carrots and Glenn Ballard's production that was on the same scale as Massive Attack in moments like both of these songs. Other album highlights: Baba, Are You Still Mad, Unsent, Joining You, I Was Hoping and The Couch.

23. Garbage - I Think I'm Paranoid

Pugnacious robo s&mer Shirley has 'issues'; confrontational and angrily beautiful. Manson’s irrational desire reaches breaking point, the fury of the chorus is channelled into one of their biggest and best choruses (the glam-grunge sneer-fest Only Happy When It Rains probably should have been my choice, but this song is just cooler). Her heartbreak sounds like an anorexic staring at someone eating pizza: completely miserable and just waiting to pounce.

24. Liz Phair - Polyester Bride

Polishes herself off to play Sheryl Crow at her own game and music wins. “You’re lucky to even know me, you're lucky to be alive.” Whitechocolatespaceegg will also see you around if you’re clever enough to be alive and buy it. Go on ahead now.

25. Luscious Jackson - Naked Eye

Hypnotically aloof and ice-cold, Jill’s calculating rap decides “wearing nothing is divine”, the sleek vocals compete against murkier sounds, all working together separately but in unison. The chorus is built from three lanes: the main vocal and two shades of backing vocals that wrap together like ribbons. Quite the package. Like this then try: Under Your Skin, City Song, Lady Fingers and Nervous Breakthrough.

Ultimate Pop Star Countdown: 30-26

2011-11-25T17:06:00.001Z

26. New Order - Regret

Neon-lit rueful depression: “have a conversation on the telephone”. It does get like that sometimes. Aching guitars that seduce you into the seductively drowsy eloquence.

27. Sheryl Crow - If It Makes You Happy

The whole album I have now decided is loosely bases on her friend she now realises cannot be helped: Oh Marie, Sad Sad World (“if I was unhappy I’d be someone you could care about … enemies make the most interesting friends”) and this are home truths served bitter-sweetly. Taking her own advice, Every Day Is A Winding Road makes every day your birthday. 1996. Now that’s what I call miserable (that's quite a specific reference - basically it was on a Now compilation I wanted specifically to have this song).

28. The Killers - Mr Brightside

Dripping in dread and anxious hesitance – “but it’s all in my head” – and revelling in it. The Stuart Price remix is a masterpiece, and turns in into the one song that was out of New Order’s reach, even at their vintage peak.

29. Dead Or Alive - Nukleopatra

The original Bad Romance. Sorry to be a bore. This is an avalanche of scathing venom, vicious narcissism, dated 90s rave thunder and unflinching decadence.

30. Ladytron - Destroy Everything You Touch

Stark pulsating discothèque, apocalyptic Hi-NRG exotica, that brittle and waspish voice and Game of Thrones style video.

Ultimate Pop Star Countdown: 35-31

2011-11-25T17:04:00.001Z

31. Christina Aguilera - Little Dreamer / Dirrty

The melancholic disco lullaby Little Dreamer is packed in the same pop noir suitcase as Rachel’s Nothing Good About This Goodbye and Margaret Berger’s Robot Song. At least in my head. Dirrty, on the other hand, was the first of its kind in terms of today's modern female pop star launching an album with a tour-de-force full-pelt club banger. It remains massive club song staple in the UK.

32. Corona - Baby Baby

Rampant and bullet-proof eurodance, Sandy’s uncredited vocal hysteria and Olga’s equator-stretching grin was the complete package as far as 90s dance anthems go.

33. Sister Sledge - Thinking of You

Blue sky disco pop, radiant and still fresh. So clean and pure it’s like they’ve dental-flossed their vocals. Timeless.

34. PJ Harvey - A Perfect Day Elise

Muffled goth clatter, a monstrous bass that sounds alive, Polly’s weird and eerie vocal, and overall perverse theatrical vamping that enhanced where she’d left off on 1995's To Bring You My Love. Taken from her career-best? Is This Desire?

35. Ace of Base - Never Gonna Say I'm Sorry

Sulky and defiant. The one song to maintain their trademark whistle-motif from The Sign. Cock-blocked from the UK charts, it missed the Billboard Hot 100 altogether after their US record label seemed somewhat displeased at almost every aspect of their output by this point.

Ultimate Pop Star Countdown: 40-36

2011-11-24T01:00:00.001Z

The next batch of posts (counting down to number one) originally stemmed from participating in an Ultimate Pop Star countdown on the Popjustice message-boards, which has been one of the most fascinating and enjoyable pop discussions of the website's entire history. Yes, I do post over there, under the alias Undisco_Me, and felt compelled to share my thoughts on the choices I made. The rules for submitting individual lists was to choose you favourite artists and select your favourite song by them (and a back-up song if the song was too obscure). Had the idea been to choose favourite songs then it might be a very different list, but I have enormous affection for pretty much any composer or performer of the songs I love anyway. However, I forgot Madonna, which I am still kicking myself about. Rather than slot her in, I am going to stay faithful to my authentic selection submitted, and have made additional comments where I have felt it necessary. 2012 will be an interesting year to sharpen my pen and re-evaluate my thoughts on Madonna's career so I will happily post-pone my decision on what is her best song for now.

36. Tori Amos - Space Dog / Bliss

Like Front Row by her former headliner Alanis Morissette, Tori's technique is, at the arrival of the spiraling chorus, beguiling as two lyrical strands are combed through and delivered in parallel as a unit of sound together. This gives the song a ghost like serenity, an echo to offer another tense. It makes me think of the Margaret Atwood novel Cat’s Eye where the protagonist is haunted by a childhood bully Cordelia, which has many detailed observations that always manage to remind me of my own thinking with regards to friends I felt betrayed me growing up, or even the understanding of one's family. Tori's final breath “those girls are gone” still lingers with me. Actually, go read Atwood with Little Earthquakes on (although Space Dog is from the follow-up Under The Pink). The marble-glare, accumulating momentum of 1999's steady-as-it-comes Bliss is the nearest anyone will ever get to submit to the same scope and groove as Running Up That Hill, this I swear. Lifted from 1999's opulent electronica masterpiece To Venus & Back, the last truly special album from the songstress.

37. Ani Difranco – Shy

Vulnerable and defensive, but self-aware, emotional, naked, temperamental, a WOMAN, and stop me if you’ve heard this one before…

38. Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Zero

Revving up from the get go, this song is just a mad dash from start to finish. Maps, Heads Will Roll and Turn Into are my other recommendations. Taking perspective from the outsider, the video follows Karen O take full command of the San Francisco landscape, and I'm proud to say I got an A for a paper I did on this theme with regards to an American Landscape History course I took in my third year at university. All together now: oooooooooh. It's the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, I'm allowed to boast.

39. Cristina Monet – You Rented A Space / What’s A Girl To Do

Cristina’s songs really have not dated (the song comes from my romanticised year of 1984), the only improvement would be to have her album Sleep It Off remastered as the sound quality on the CD re-issue from 2005 is terrible. However, her biting lyrics and brilliant arrangements are undeniable. I always enjoyed You Rented A Space so much as it’s like a soliloquy from the perspective of some love-stung, drunk-sounding southern belle. Cristina’s drawl makes her lyrics hang like chandeliers (Monet was English, but her stylized southern American accent adds such bruising to it all). What’s A Girl To Do would be the obvious song I’d play someone to impress them – no other pop star has set out to do something so sardonic and addictive, ever. It’s so impressive it sounds as if you’ve been waiting to hear it all your life. You Rented A Space is tamer by comparison, but my throat burns with vodka just thinking about it. A hugely endearing quality about this song in particular, but her music in general, is that she articulates and conveys extreme emotions, but through her lyrics and clatter-tastic arrangements (only the chugging tale of a date with a misogynist banker on Ticket To The Tropics and the glossy guitar riff on Don’t Mutilate My Mink come anywhere near to sounding slick) and executes it all with a perfect balance that’s just relentlessly unflinching. Chic.

40. Genevieve Waite – Pink Gin & Lime

Oh this one was mocked slightly in the countdown, but this song is so sweet, Gen is a true one off and thank god music reviewers never used the word “quirky” much in the 70s. The song is gin-soaked and deliriously merry and slightly insance. “Pink gin and lime for a fake ballerina / Out of her mind from sniffin dry cleaner.”

The Dandy Warhols Comes Down (1997)

2011-11-19T23:23:00.001Z

Deadbeat-chic anthems such as Boys Better, the top twenty single Not If You Were The last Junkie On Earth, and the exhilarating and rippling spasms of Everyday Is A Holiday (it's sonic fuel of synthesizers, indie-disco and overall sulky magnificence, which sustains its grip at the center of such speeds, is pretty unbeatable). Shoe-gazing album tracks such as Cool As Kim Deal, Minnesoter, the glum I Love You and the shimmery Iggy Pop-esque stand out Good Morning (the jangly psychedelia creates a hauntingly somber euphoria that continues to fizz for exactly 5 epic minutes, taking full flight in no small part to its layered backing vocals gliding above the gauging grunge and sweet-sounding sneers). Admittedly, some of the songs just float away, but the big pop hooks are sky high.

Rating:

8/10

The Opiates - Hollywood Under The Knife (2011)

2011-11-10T22:36:00.001Z

Drenched in decadence and atmospheric eloquence, The Opiates debut album Hollywood Under The Knife marks the legendary singer Billie Ray Martin's first album since her soul-enriching 2001 solo set Eighteen Carat Garbage. Her partner in crime and co-producer is Robert Solheim who filters the singer's unmistakably soulful voice (in turns plaintive, expressive, rueful and sometimes plain paranoid) through electronic veils, dramatic guises and a disturbing clatter of upscale arrangements.

The pulsating, sole uptempo Reality TV originally took shape as a demo submitted for consideration to go on Britney's Blackout album. Lyrically, Billie bites a little too close to to the bone to the Britney breakdown for this to have been realistically included on a Spears album. And thank god. It ranks among Martin's highest pop peaks. So much so I can only imagine holding it back for a future Billie solo album proved too hard to not share. Soldhiem perfectly spikes Billie's exquisitely prescription-pumped ballad-as-pop-song with electronic tinkles like a beard made from fragments of ice, tailoring it with the synth-pop equivalent of luxuriously gaudy sequins.

It is a song that fits in with Billie's winning batch of electro-disco or otherwise just plain outstanding singles from 2003-5: the manic head-rush and disorientating vanishing-point disco of No Brakes On My Rollerskates (experience your feet feel as if they've left the ground), the panting prostitute anthem Twisted Lover ("I'm all tied up, not strings attached"), the gelid-eyed gutter diva moment of Bright Lights Fading (where she wants to "spend my royalties on poor boys"), the murky Elvis tribute Dead Again, the seething orgasm of all available orifices Undisco Me and the smoldering and morbidly chic Je Regrette Everything (one can only hope the singer scoops these incredible songs together for an eventual solo album). Reality TV transmits a broody and no less euphoric energy that isn't replicated anywhere else. Tinkling like watery salts and electronic silver metals, Billie almost sings sweetly about the morose subject matter of fame's extreme and irresistible torment.

The album opens like an oozing mist with the somber-probably-not-sober Rainy Days and Saturdays. Billie's plaintive, solitary and taut emotional expressionism is complimented with a sparse ambiance that captures the poignancy of private inspection, long-lasting ennui and rueful loneliness. The beauty builds largely due to the singer's expert, or resigned, restraint.

The seductively strange Silent Comes The Night is arguably the album's peak of alienation, with the creepy whispers about watching too much TV generating an odd, unhinged exotica. Clattery. Floorboard-creaking. Viciously reclusive. Perfectly shaded. This is what being the old lady expertly looking out her window behind the vintage 80s Venetian blinds at night time might sound like. Like Reality TV, it was also initially scheduled for her own solo album and not surprisingly is another stand out.

Atmosphere-swept Dinah & The Beautiful Blue caught me completely off guard. Like a cool night-time breeze hitting you at just the right moment with just the right view, I had to pause and silence everything both during and after it just to appreciate what I was had just gone through. This album is very stylistic, but here the tension has been released. Startlingly sparse and yet emotionally huge. Sadness as a privilege. It must take a huge heart to feel this sad. The remains of the album are percolating discoid-driven affairs or more gradual, guarded items where Billie offers yet more expensive secrets, drama-queen paranoia and tranquil tenderness.

The Opiates are largely geared towards an aesthetic of self-scrutiny through a careful lens of perfection-craving, a diet of the finest Depeche Mode album tracks and both a glinting and detached sardonic commentary on Hollywood as a subtle concept to hinge these elegantly mysterious songs onto. The album may be too dimly-lit for its own good for some, but this is not a Billie solo album and in the understanding of the duo's ambiguous agenda is a sculpted masterpiece aiming to be appreciated in the most perverse ways possible. As Siouxsie Sioux once sang, "transfixed by the inner sound". Buy this album without delay.

Rating:

9/10

Paris Hilton - Paris (2006)

2011-10-27T02:29:00.000+01:00

Bitchy, talentless, insincere, superficial, deeply vapid and deeply penetrated, the debut album from Paris Hilton benefits all such truths, and whilst her feelings go no deeper than her vagina, her KY-breath vocals really show off what money can buy. Scaring the wormy shit out of Jessica Simpson, Haylie Duff, and Ali Lohan, the slut-pop bar was raised to impressive new lows. Like crabs, some of these songs are a bitch to get rid of. Hilton took time out from standing in clubs and 5 years later the world is still in her debt (just look at Greece).

With vocals that sound stickier than cloths found under the beds of teenage boys, Paris manages to be at the centre of a Billy Steinberg ballad that is actually worthy of all his biggest 80s hits. It's not impossible to imagine Cyndi, The Bangles or even Madonna all having an iconic 80s #1 smash with it. Oh, the song is called Heartbeat, which she says beats purely for the thrill of hearing her latest jock "cum" whilst sounding like her mouth is full of it. A delightful image: her designer vagina must spin fluids like a washing machine. If that doesn't sound delicious enough, the heiress elsewhere sings/opens-her-piehole about more muscle-ripped jocks having sword fights in her gob (maybe the song is in tribute to Veronica Sawyer from the film Heathers?).

Alcazar famously declined Paris's offer to record a duet called Camel-Toe At The Discotheque

The Kelly Clarkson climate of the moody Jealousy is almost too deliberate to ring true, but the years that have passed since the tabloid-drama of the singer's fall out with Nicole Ritchie has removed this issue. Engagingly glum, it is also restraint, and Paris chooses a careful and poised delivery to add just the right amount of disdain. Having close friends be jealous of you is actually a horrible experience. Some people just don't want to be helped. You just need to let go. How can you stay friends with someone who wants you to be as miserable as they are? Paris handles the track with atypical class and persuasion of a different kind than her usual references to consistent hotness. Not so much friends with benefits than friends with hepatitis.

Nothing sluttier on this table anyway.

The euphoric itchiness of Nothing In This World is an unexpected triumph and deserved to be more widespread than a drunk cheerleader in a changing room. Memorably throwaway, the slickly pseudo-anthemic I Want You soars with the glossy Grease Is The Word siren-led sample, it's playfulness enough to rival Mariah's own 80s-bingeing Loverboy.

Several stand outs appear on the album, but the filler is typical Scott Storch fodder: synths ignite well enough for Turn You On, which is as self-prepping as you can imagine; the sparse opener (or arse opener depending on how you interpret the lyrics) Turn It Up is a whisper-reel for her then-catchphrases such as "I'm hot" and "yeah" (although money can't buy choruses apparently); Fighting Over Me is just a generic hip hop influenced track Paris just happens to breathe on, and she probably gives her chauffeur more consideration.

Initially going by the much better working title of Paris Is Burning, music fans were salivating for her album as far back as 2004 with the Alex G remix of Screwed. Originally geared up to be recorded by the horrifically sibling-obscured, oblong-faced beauty Hayle Duff, Paris opted for the dryer, credible rock chug option but the Alex G edit remains the song's definitive lubrication.

Not one to turn down cock, Not Leaving Without You is one of the album's peaks. First single Stars Are Blind is sunkissed and doesn't surrender to her club crusades for rich cock (it's the personality of the cock that counts, duh!). Thinner than her friendships, her VOICE on Da Ya Think I'm Sexy is relatively sedate and not worth being awake for beyond pointing out how bad it is. Middle of the road-or-rehab trash.

With just enough successes seeping through the music-as-accessory club jams, the debut album from cock-magnet Paris Hilton is far more listenable than haters would think it ought to be. It's every bit as icky, disinterested and utterly trashtastic as someone like myself wants it to be. The only time Paris would show emotion would be if her card got declined, Paris - The Album is about feeling good and looking even more expensive. A once in a lifetime moment in pop.

What's taken more of a beating - the drums or her...

Rating:

8/10

Diva Incarnate Back To The 80s October Playlist

2011-10-25T04:43:00.000+01:00

For me recently on a 4am girls and guitars bender: Cyndi Lauper (the fizzy acceleration of Money Changes Everything that doesn't touch the ground or the sides); The Bangles's Going Down To Liverpool (blue-sky jangly pop par excellence, it really sets sail with their harmonies, but of course it is Debbie hear who makes it so irresistibly wistful and imaginative this time - the Susanah Hoffs spotlight was yet to be switched on); Patty Smyth (her 1987 debut album is basically Cyndi meets Springsteen - lots of hightlights, her collaborators are in actual fact Eric Brazilian, Rob Hyman, William Wittman, Rick Chertoff, Billy Steinberg and Tom Kelly, so this is no surprise); the enchanting Rooms On Fire from the bewitching Stevie Nicks, and Voice of The Beehive (the fleshed out expensive chorus of Scary Kisses never fails to set my adrenaline to a high setting). I'm also listening to the Divinyls, but it's the song Only Human On The Inside, and that was in the 90s - I always knew it as a Pretenders song (and that it was a cover), but Chrissy Amphlett's recogniseably expressive voice delivers the killer blow of the lyrics with more charm and radiance - and you need to wait for it's gentle fade out, at which point I wish it could go on for another 3 minutes itself. I do need to mention the Go Gos, and so Our Lips Are Sealed is their bubbliest moment, Jane almost over-took it with her own Rush Hour, and Belinda's girlier efforts were rendered iconic by her voice of steel alone - the Julia Roberts of the radio.

Gloria Estefan - Miss Little Havana (2011)

2011-10-06T21:37:00.000+01:00

Miss Little Havana is half celebration of the music Gloria Estefan grew up around, half soundtrack to falling in love again with the one you fell in love with in the first place. Rhythm is everything and everywhere. Gloria's lyrical themes range as broad as the musical traditions she scoops from navigate are varied (Cuba, Miama, Mexico and South America to be exact).

Hair today, hair tomorrow.

Working in sync with Pharrel, and the match is magnetic, she injects so much fervor and zest that was missing from her last album. Gloria bumps up against her man in the club on the sweat-drenched sticatto of the title track. Punctuated by precise production flourishes, Gloria gets the game going with a smart and fun lyric. Evolving steadily but expertly, it sets the pulse of the album, is exuberant and yet initially feels mild on the surface - it requires the listener to dig deep into both her rueful considerations and the rewarding texture of Pharrel's ear for detail. It's a groove that finds its power in its control and structure. The crisp, undulating and humid rhythms are enhanced by the noticeably deepened, gritty and fully-committed vocals. The experience is sharply executed, driven by cocktails, sly dance-floor tactics and flirtatiously conceived moments of eye-brow raising humor. With the hair and the flair, Gloria's lyrical command, grace and sheer bite is the ultimate ignition. Once again intoxicating when the rhythm gets her.

Gloria has yet to sign on for the new franchise: Housewives of Havana.

Less is much more on the gentle romantic calm of I Can't Believe, which introduces jazzy and mellow piano riffs mixed with some understated Latin lounge aroma, which is formidable in its own right, and rendered so via Gloria's delivery of a gorgeous lyric about catching the same glimpse of another, and herself, all these years later. This is a truly heartwarming song, and its Cuban inflection helps create an unassuming appearance that only experience could pull off to such a high standard. A fine pick among the more emphatic contenders for album highlights. Estefan's soothing voice perfectly conveys the strain of being once mudled up in life's obstacles and now finding herself marvelling "isn't life really something?" This moments kills me. The tight rhythm section accompanying the quick step middle-eight is also really something.

The frenzied first single Wepa is a dizzying burst of sizzling attitude. Disrinct, disorientating and highly addictive, it sadly doesn't have a chance in hell of becoming a hit. The song does hit though - it hits you right in the face, if it was more in your face it would give you a rash. At once startling, the jarring jerks and rabid visceral observations are unexpected and worth getting used to.

Proving it pays to have junk in the trunk, the album keeps peeking in the far reaches of the second half. The album's zenith, Hotel Nacional is a hilarious standout, and Susan Lucci just won the highest accolade of her career. Gloria's wry depiction of getting down via flirtatious rhyming is laugh out loud stuff. It's impossible not perk up at such sleek, clubccentric salsa-induced neck-snapping when the alternative is Madonna's unasked-for crotch-thrusting from her own Pharrel-favoured Give It To Me. Hotel is one of the few songs unassisted by Pharrel, which is a testiment to how much Gloria is giving herself to the record (although the fact that it was recorded in 4 weeks is a little telling in that is has no obvious hit singles). The point of all the silliness is that you should be moving your body, and you will be. Whenever the intensity seems to reach a peak, the song retreats and gears up for another charge.

Hands off Gloria.

The modest salsa shuffles of Heat, Say Ay, So Good, Right Away and Make Me Say are further consecutive hip-shakers. Gloria gets to relax a bit and enjoy the contemporary edge that never deviates from her tradition and warm capabilities. They have much the same flavour, but importantly have connection. Cutting to the bone, Time Is Ticking is Reach 15 years on. With more than a hint of velvet to her vocals, where her lyrics fall into well-versed ground it is the deluxe emotional depth I'm most grateful for.

Sweeter than the rest, Medicine is a tonic of sleek and sharp electronica that injects into the same vein as the best vintage Peter Rauhofer remixes. I am overdosing on it. The stoic momentum builds into a surreal unidentified pathos. Gloria's husky and thickly-textured timbre gets hot and cold, mischievous, rebellious and caring. The hot to trot Make My Heart Go implements a usurping blend of na na na na's with emphatic club accents, and feels slightly less authentic than Medicine, but it's equally pleasant nonetheless. Synthesizers galore make their presence known throughout the dancefloor dosages of Medicine, Make My Heart Go and Hotel Nacional. Most impressively of all, Gloria herself remains the focus: smart, vivid and in her exquisite comfort zone. Indeed the presence of the few songs, bonus or otherwise, that are not produced by Pharrel only thickens the plot.

Because of its ten year exposure, Gloria's belated recording of Let's Get Loud isn't winning many fans, which might be due to the fact that for many it might sound a little exhausted. It represents where she left off with Gloria! and therefore feels slightly out of place here. A signature song for J-Lo (co-written by Estefan, but left off her own album), it wasn't even a hit and yet has became a ubiquitous reference point for Latin cross-over pop. Estefan herself missed the so-called Latin pop heatwave of 1999, ironically led by J-Lo among others (even Geri Halliwell managed to be ready for it without knowing). Had it been included on Gloria! these doubts would not be considered, and it would have been a sure-fire signature anthem for her at a time when she really needed it. However, despite lacking the sheer spontaneity and flamboyant virtuosity it would have delivered back in 1998 it is a very welcome recording to finally own. Contrived as hell, it's a classic hand-bag anthem. 10 years on, Gloria's going to different clubs where you'd get thrown out for that kind of carry on.

Joyful sounds ablaze on a dynamic return to dance. This is a richly textured document of an original and important voice in modern music. Miss Little Havan re-captures the bravura that made her such a potent threat in the first place. More chic than extravagant, why bother trying to be anything less?

Rating:

9/10

Joan Osborne - Little Wild One (2008)

2011-10-06T20:19:00.000+01:00

12 years after most would have remembered her, Joan Osborne re-connected, rather than re-visited, her Relish roster of collaborators and re-kindles the bluesy, ballsy soft-rock that she made her name with. I have always been long intrigued by Osborne’s one-hit-wonder status, with her striking voice and starkly beguiling follow-up single St Teresa being especially welcome on my music players. After Joan hit the high heavens with her ubiquitous 1996 hit single One of Us, her career didn't stop but her radio stamina seemed to end without any clear indication as to why. For one thing, it took 5 years for her record label issues to iron themselves out for a follow-up, 2000's Ritcheous Love, to be released. After this point, Osborne has steadily released music in the form of 2002's covers set How Sweet It Is, 2006's country-tinged Pretty Little Stranger, 2007's Breakfast In Bed and finally came 2008's Little Wild One. Presumably it was the album her label wanted her to make 10 years previously as it reunites her with her Relish regulars of Eric Brazilian (One of Us, Billie Myers' Kiss The Rain), Rick Chertoff (Cyndi Lauper's She Bop, Sophie B. Hawkins' Right Beside You) and Rob Hyman (both Lauper's Time After Time and The Water's Edge). These guys have long fascinated me: they have written some incredible material for female artists over the years, most of which have had huge hits and then continued with a cult following). Boasting her enigmatic vocal authority, the record contains slightly jazzier pop-rock sounds, layered with subtle keyboards here and there, R&B-inflections, and sporadic orchestrations arriving like warm night-time breezes. Her voice is like a power-steering mechanism: her ease, energetic runs and sheer fluidity between the different forces whilst sounding modest and restrained is a thing of beauty.

Album opener Halleluja will immediately draw comparisons to One of Us, but is more of a restraint folk song than radio bait. Sweeter Than The Rest was the album's single and it sustains a haunting sense of romance that immediate rekindles the same flame as St. Teresa or perhaps even Planets of The Universe by Stevie Nicks. Haunting ballad built on a bridge of piano keys that slightly imitate Imagine, Cathedrals is the album's biggest surprise, radiant and deeply touching. Her bracing contralto is on fine balladeering form. The soft tempo of Meet You In The Middle is full of Joan’s lilting, dulcet harmonies and even the harmonica is tuneful, even if it sounds like the theme from Roseanne.

One of my favourite tracks from last year was a gorgeous, lo-fi strummy ballad called Loser Dreamer by country queen of stoic melancholy Shelby Lynne, and Osborne gives this song a run for its money with her own haunting acoustic torch song To The One I Love. Both tracks are pensively considering life as it passes by, musing almost stream-of-concious world-weary lyrics. Adding soul-drenching organs, To The One I Love flourishes in every way.

The soaring dirt-kicking Rodeo is her own Everyday Is A Winding Road, built on a series of seductive and frolicking high and low vocal journeys. Softer still, Daddy-O relies on Joan's earthy wail to ignite its yearnfully plaintive seduction. More organs add further chills. An isolated electric guitar riff is also welcome here. Seeking an Indian influence in her mesmerizingly off-key introduction notes, Can't Say No could almost have been a Billie Myers song. Can't Say No has a stronger momentum than most of the songs here and even almost has a chorus.

The overall thrust of Osborne’s vocals is something very special. Its mystical quality, tempered with occasional steel , gives me tingles. Every song fits so well here, with songs like To The One I Love softly working their magic, and highlighted by the more purposeful Sweeter Than The Rest, cautious torch ballad Cathedrals, the sensual Can’t Say No and energetic Rodeo. The conviction to her voice adds a legitimacy to the songs that her lyrics never quite achieve on their own, but the sense of renewed vigor makes this her best album to date. The arrangements do well to compliment her rootsy qualities without making things too glossy at the expense of sincerity. It can be heard that there is not as much money being thrown at this record as Relish, but this overdue album finally delivers a set of songs engaging from start to finish even if they will never be as exposed to people in the same way her signature song was and remains to this day. One criticism might be that this album is echoing Relish too much, but that album was never this melodic and cohesive. However, Little Wild One does not merely play it safe, her haunting drawl is there, the tender moments are the result of experience and the overall effect is one of skill, assurance and a connection between the musicians writing this album alongside a vastly underrated singer who just happens to have one of the very best voices of an entire generation.

Rating:

8/10

I Know You Wanna Say: Corona Interview

2011-10-04T12:55:00.000+01:00

If you lived under a rock during the 90s let me tell you about the Hi-NRG Euro-disco legend of Corona: originally sung by Sandy Chambers who was locked in a cupboard for 5 years whilst the gorgeous and charismatic Brazillian model Olga De Souza, with the legs as tall as sky-crapers and the shit-gritting grin that stretched as far as the equator, fronted the act, lip-synced for her life and had everyone's eye out with her enviable dreadlocks whilst spinning round on stage in a cackling frenzy (she's famous for laughing at pretty much everything, and has actually been banned from funerals in her native Brazil and adopted home of Italy). She has been dining out on the batch of hits taken from the landmark debut album ever since (these are the slightly unknown minor worldwide hit Rhythm of The Night, the more pugnacious Baby Baby, the open-to-offers anthem Try Me Out, and the disco-drunk funk of I Don't Want To Be A Star). High ranking album tracks include the heavy demands of I Gotta Keep Dancing, When I Give My Love, I Want Your Love and Don't Go Breaking My Heart.

On the much-delayed 1998 follow-up album Walking On Music, the arrangement continued, as did their fast-forward attitude to sensitive love issues on the singles: the strident groove of Walking On Music, the sumptuous glide of The Power of Love and the energetic mayhem of Magic Touch (they were not massive hits, but continued the same rampant and euphoric euro-dance formula as before). The other track worth mentioning happens to be the best of the bunch, I Belong To You (80s), which sounds like PWL circa 1990 - it almost has the same scintillating elements as Donna Summer's This Time I Know It's For Real, only this time we knew for real she really wasn't singing.

In 2000, Olga released an album called And Me U under the alias of Corona X, but the material was slightly rock influenced and every bit as appealing to fans of their vintage style as that sounds (Diva Incarnate scored it a reasonable 6 out of 10): hidden delights included the Donna Summer-esque I Only Came To Dance, with its timeless marriage of disco yearning and plaintive exhiliration, and the single Good Love, which was accompanied by a slightly more accessible dance remix. Olga also sang all the songs herself and even sounds a bit like that faceless bird Sandy Chambers who had fled for her life by this point.

Olga continued to sporadically release one-off singles (going down a slightly Dannii Minogue-esque route if you will), with the best to comment on being the Spanish-tongued hypnotico dance jam La Playa De Sol, but it was not until last year that Corona came back with a selection of trance-identified dance-pop songs as part of an actual album campaign. It was called Y Generation and ignited the charts in Italy, reaching NUMBER ONE on the Italian itunes dance album charts (you can just imagine the stiff competition - thank goodness Lisa Scott-Lee wasn't releasing anything that week). I was a fan of this album, it kept an obsessed Corona crusader like myself fairly happy, and the seething trance temperatures of the single Angel even produced a True Blood inspired video (Olga's first promotional clip in 12 years), and was number 1 on the Diva Incarnate 'Best Singles of 2010' countdown. The 2nd single Saturday was delivered to itunes with a dollop of decadent remixes, and the final release was called My Song. Once again, the most infectious creation was left as an album track, this time a lust-fueled trance orgasm snappishly called Gimme Love (not saying please is just plain rude if you ask me). A new song to launch a re-release of the album is on the way...

Hi Olga, thanks for agreeing to interviewed.

Following the mostly pop-rock sounds of And Me U, Y Generation was something of a return to dance music – although it also successfully pursues new sounds, was it a conscious decision to go back to your roots as it were?

Yes, because i love dance music, the dance with good melodies and so I deciced to went back to my roots

The single Angel's video seemed to be inspired by shows such as True Blood with its elements of folklore - what was the overall meaning behind it?

[Olga did not answer this question]

You also sing a Capella different lyrics to the recorded version...

[Olga did not answer this question]

A lot of people didn't quite understand the product placement for the hair product.

But in this case jean louis Italy just help to do my hairstyle in the video, so we just put a fast show of their products.

It took more then 3 hours to do my hairstyle in the video, so its was just a thank

The Corona project has endured many changes with regards to the machinery behind it (different producers, record labels, etc): did you ever consider giving up the name and releasing music under your own name? Olga de Souza is an amazing name...

No, I LOVE Corona. . I like changing labels and producers, but CORONA is always my name.

You have been using your own vocals for well over a decade, starting with 2000's And Me U, and I must say I absolutely love hearing it on the new album - it's so expressive and I love the cackles of laughter on Angel. It seems to have improved - is this due to practicing?

Yes, i always study and improve

Will there ever be a chance of working with original Corona songwriters and producers and songwriters ever again?

No, they are old now and i am still young . .ahhh ahhh

Are there any plans to perform, release and promote in the UK again? The UK record label

AATW seems like a good company to release Angel with.

We contated my labels in UK , there was some interest but after . . nothing happen, but we will keep pushing

What has been the success of the Y Generation album in Italy, and what other countries has it been released in?

After ITALY where we had a # 1 on I TUNES DANCE ALBUM IN ITALY , we did Germany, Austria and Swiss, Singapore, Malasya, Greece and we exported some copies in France, Benelux and many other countries.

And Angel the single, with some new remixes, will be released soon in France.

My knowledge of Italian pop is limited to the singers Alexia (Uh La La La), Gala (Tough Love, Freed From Desire and Lose Yourself In Me) and Sabrina Salerno (A Flower's Broken) - they seem to have a huge appetite for female

dance-driven music - what has been the key to Corona finding its most enduring success there?

I think the songs, ITALIAN DANCE means always good melodies, and the italian producers are perfect for the good melodies

It's very hard for international fans to keep up to date with the latest Corona news - will there be

plans to keep fans more up to date on your website?

All please look my new official you tube . . http://www.youtube.com/CORONAOFFICIAL. .

All the updates will be there. There will be a good news soon, with a collaboration with an important dj.

There were so many dance acts and female dance divas in the 90s - do you ever keep in touch with any?

Yes, Alexia, ice mc, Spagna are good friends

My favourite song from Y Generation is the euphoric Hi-NRG trance temperatures of Gimme Love (the productions is ecstatic and very fresh) - are there any plans to release it as a single? And will there be more videos for the project?

I am not sure Gimme Love can be a single. Thanks for your compliments.

What is your favourite song from the new album and why?

Angel and Saturday. I think we create a good groove ! and the new single ( not in the album) is hot.

Does it ever feel strange when people mention songs from the first two albums as being their favourites when you never actually sung on them? For example, I love the song I Belong To You (80s) as it is so glitzy and glossy, and also sounds like a Donna Summer song from her PWL-produced Another Time album (1989), but sadly would never expect you to perform it...

[Olga did not answer this question]

Speaking of Donna Summer, my favourite And Me U song was I Only Came To Dance, which is VERY Donna Summer. Who exactly are your musical influences, past and present?

My influence is all the 70’ disco and also the new wave of the ‘80s and of course the brasilian music.

Have you ever met Sandy Chambers, and how did the agreement to be the face of Corona come

about, and what were your overall feelings about the arrangement over time?

We were all a big team and big friends

You have successfully fronted the Corona project for almost 20 years - without naming names, what is the most scandalous, jaw-dropping story about another celebrity you can tell me?

Top secret.

Who is your most famous friend?

Top Secret about the most famous. . my real friends are my fans

Angel was my blog's 'Best Single of 2010' and Y Generation was an artistic triumph. What plans are next? Will you record a new album soon?

The new single . .and a new edition of Y Generation . . stay tunes. . Thank you everybody.

Thanks for your answers Olga x

Gala - Lose Yourself In Me (New Single 2011)

2011-09-17T23:35:00.000+01:00

Gala's decision to embrace her dance legacy was clearly a close shave.

Owner of possibly the best sculpted cheekbones short of a 90 degrees angle, enigmatic musical hero of mine Gala has impressively sent shock-waves through my shivering body upon my first half a dozen listens of her very new spine-tingling single called, you might have guessed, Lose Yourself In Me, a dance-identified electronic, throbbing dance ballad.

Positively drenched in all her trademark Gala quirks, its melancholic splendor finds the Italian dance warrior on beguiling form (fans would expect nothing less). I simply cannot think when I am enjoying new music as much as this - what a fine treat for my ears to hear it, an unexpected return to unequivocal dance music from the creator of the 90s classics Freed From Desire, Let A Boy Cry, Come Into My Life, Everyone Has Inside and Suddenly (which were all Italian top 5 smashes). The song has already been embraced by a random German radion station and is #5 on this chart. Gala continues to reek havoc around the world whilst touring and rigorously sharpening her game. If we get a video, expect her signature androgynous posturing. Fed on a diet of visceral rhythms and philosophical lyrics, Lose Yourself In Me falls nothing short of mesmerizing.

What is happening with Diva Incarnate.

2011-09-15T19:15:00.002+01:00

At the moment I am not able to consistently update the blog: the quality control has been uneven in terms of tone and content. Initially, much of the writing consisted of subtly imposing an irreverent fiction onto the subjects of my album and song write-ups, and more recently the humor became less vulgar and less obvious. A recent 'return to form' post was my review of Sabrina Salerno's flop 1999 album Broken Flowers, but writing track-by-track articles can take a whole evening of listening to music, which is fine if I'm not tired or busy with other distractions. My plan is to post when I can, but try and post at least one album review per month and aim to share a few songs or news of various happenings with the artists that I like. My blog has never aimed to simply regurgitate news that is heard on other blogs (although I will always credit my source whenever this is the case, which is something I deleted another blog from my links section when they copied-and pasted material from my blog to theirs without even linking their source); and my blog has never been merely about building up readership by commenting on other sites simply to get my own web-page promoted. So basically, if you have enjoyed my blog then I appreciate that enormously, but I simply can't go back to posting 20-30 posts per month ever again. I am in my final year of studies but am keen to keep Diva Incarnate thriving one way or another. Feel free to follow me on twitter (the link should be at the top right of the page), and I would love to hear from people.

Best,

G xx

Aqua Head Over To Venus (Via Uranus, Probably)

2011-09-12T13:58:00.003+01:00

Is there a man telling us to purchase this from iTunes, or has Rene's voice just really improved?

Head over to Chart Rigger for a more thorough Aqua seeing to.

The Opiates - Hollywood Under The Knife

2011-09-02T14:40:00.003+01:00

Above: Britney Spears may have turned down Reality TV, but Billie still managed to snatch her wig.

Billie Ray Martin is all set to release her long-awaited Opiates album called Hollywood Under The Knife. To say it has been hard work for her to get to this stage would be an understatement, the project clearly means a lot to her and Diva Incarnate cannot wait to hear it all. Personally, I have stayed away from hearing snippets as I want this to be a fresh experience. The song Reality TV (Lonely, Lonely Girl) has been a huge favourite for a few years now, and was first touted to Britney of all people back in 2007! The song is definately pop, but Billie has a voice that cannot be covered and I would never be satisfied hearing anyone else sing her song first. BRM also submitted a proper pop song to Dannii Minogue's older sister Kylie called Sattelite, so fingers crossed we get that on an eventual Billie Ray Martin solo album, which is promised. The album Hollywood Under The Knife is out 17.10.11 preceded by an EP 19.09.11. These can be pre-ordered on iTunes now.

Dannii's new album Fear of Releasing Music track-listing revealed!

2011-09-01T18:11:00.000+01:00

Above: Dannii was 'floored' when she heard Healing On The Dancefloor.

Former sunlounger tyrant turned frumpy MILF Dannii Minogue must be scoring as high as her sisters right eyebrow right now as all her unreleased post Neon Nights recordings seem to be hitting the back of the net. Hard. Whilst we all anticipate how disappointing, lazy and half-assed her next bootleg single will be when it arrives in 2015, Team Minogue must have decided to get our juices flowing with an unexpected array of 'buzz' singles. Late to arrive, Healing On The Dancefloor comes just days after its sister tracks Fear of Flying and Karma Is A Bitch were exposed to mixed responses, in turns blown away, moderately pleased and lukewarm. Diva Incarnate is very much in favour of how sophisticated and artistic they are - take Fear of Flying for example where Dannii tells heartfelt tales about homophobia, office worker ennui and domestic violence before rejecting any responsibility herself by blurting out "answers? I don't know". Healing On The Dancefloor is a low key stunner, but no single. Who is to say whether any of these would have done well for her as singles? We must remember that Spend Your Love On Me sounded a tiny bit like that slightly successful #1 single Just A Little Bit by Liberty X, but in a distinctly Dannii way (ie. bitchy, aloof and tinged with drug-induced glamour). The only other track that has yet to leak, that I have long wanted to hear anyway, is a Kara DioGuardi co-write called Message In A Bottle. Maybe Nathansayz forgot to wash all the KY off his hands when he logged into gaydar to persuade guys to have sex with him and the whole thing just backfired - however we have got these tracks doesn't matter, it is a bittersweet time to be a Dannii Fannii yet again.

My own 'imaginary' Dannii 2004 album called Fear of Releasing Music goes ... something like this:

01. Fear of Flying

02. Karma Is A Bitch

03. Spend Your Love On Me

04. Going Going Gone

05. Sex Dice

06. No Romeo

07. Message In A Bottle

08. Welcome The Teardrops

09. Karma Sutra

10. Invitation

11. Do You Believe Me Now

12. Healing On The Dancefloor

13. Loving You All Over Again

Dannii's Belated 'Buzz' Singles

2011-08-31T14:57:00.005+01:00

In an effort to create some 'buzz' for Dannii Minogue's stagnant pop career, two of her most highly-anticipated unreleased tracks have recently leaked. Both Karma Is A Bitch and the supposed lead single that never was Fear of Flying are 'out there'. Recorded for the follow-up to 2003's nice n' sleazy Neon Nights album, they were produced by Korpi and Blackcell along with another as-yet unreleased song called Healing On The Dancefloor. Karma is by far my favourite, silky, smooth and seductive, it simply glides into your ears and is good enough to make me believe Guy Sigsworth produced it! It also contains the bitchy lyric "is that baby on prescriptions just to get into a zone?" Fear of Flying is not as instant, but has even dirtier beats and contains a heartfelt plot about a gay guy coming out of the closet (done much better than a certain try-hard tranny I could mention), and the rippling middle-8 followed by a stream of piano keys are utterly divine. Both tracks ooze classic Dannii iciness and yet are luxurious and touching. What they both highlight is how lazy she became with her AATW mash-ups such as You Won't Buys This Either, Rejection and Douche Me Like That. If she had an album ready to go containing these two leaks, not to mention the 'odds and ends' Unleashed compilation album highlights Spend Your Love On Me and No Romeo, then she was a major nong for choosing the easy option of releasing disparate dance mash-ups with AATW every 6 months.

New Gala EP In The Works

2011-08-05T22:26:00.004+01:00

I am rather busy these days, but the return of Gala with a new EP has brought me back. The enigmatic Italian music creator is working on the project in New York, but has been busy on the road in Europe performing her classic 90s hits as well as her more recent Tough Love album material, including the bristling dance-rock hybrid Different Kind of Love and the passionate title track. From the same album, the pre-civil partnership dance-pop ballad You & Me remains one of my favourite songs of all time and I just cannot wait to hear what the singer has came up with next!

Kim Wilde - Snapshot tracklisting revealed

2011-07-27T20:38:00.005+01:00

Here we are folks, the dream we've all dreamed of. Green-fingered goddess Kim Wilde has revealed the tracklisting for her covers album Snapshot and, as far as these stopgap projects go, it is not too shabby. You can be the judge:

01. It's Alright (East 17)
02. In Between Days (The Cure)
03. About You Now (Sugababes)
04. Sleeping Satellite (Tasmin Archer)
05. To France (Mike Oldfield)
06. A Little Respect (Erasure)
07. Remember Me (Diana Ross)
08. Anyone Who Had A Heart (Dionne/Dusty/Cilla)
09. Wonderful Life (Black)
10. They Don't Know About Us (Kirsty MacColl)
11. Beautiful Ones (Suede)
12. Just What I Needed (The Cars)
13. Ever Fallen In Love (With Someone) (Buzzcocks)
14. Kooks (David Bowie)

Originally released by the Triga-chic East 17, It's Alright reached #2 in Kim's main market Germany so I guess she is picking some clever songs. This version may be slightly tame, but it does the trick. Kim has recorded 2 other music videos: for Sleeping Satellite and To France.

If you can't wait for the album, try reading some of my previous in-depth, track by track Kim Wilde album reviews here.

After All Is Said & Done

2011-07-08T20:42:00.005+01:00

Above: not even a flop could stop Eddie Gorniak (having one and one and one more plastic surgery after the other - looking good, girl).

I have long been obsessed with the 90s wintry dance-ballad hit One & One by the gorgeous Robert Miles and sung by English singer Maria Nayler (was her school nick-name "nail her"?), and so when I finally looked it up on wikipedia my jaw dropped lower than my trousers when I realised it was in a fact a cover. Written by the ever-reliable Billy Steinberg and Rick Nowels (one day you'll make it big guys), Polish Eurovision has-been and dance-pop surgery-addict Edyta Gorniak recorded it first, but was slow off the mark and didn't actually get around to releasing it herself until it was far too late. Her own version could only limp in at #79 in Germany (get that smash, girl). Major disappointment. Gorniak has a great set of pipes, and gives it some welly alright, but the fragile, almost Ladytron-like vocals of Nayler's more expressive and shivvery (although perhaps a tad mannered) outting remains the definitive recording for me. Now that I have discovered this song I can't wait for my copy of Gorniak's 2002 album to arrive through my box, which she recorded with the producers of the Spice Girls (although apparantly it sounds nothing like Wannabe and 2 Become 1). However, after all is said and done, Gorniak does have the better video, delivering beautiful male torsos, her own androgynous crew cut that would made Ellen leave Portia for, a jawline that could slice through timber and eyebrow movement Kylie would kill (her botox Dr) for.