eThoughts

Roomie Revenge

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sat, 18 May 2013 08:46:00 +0000

The previous two posts did speak a lot on the lines of marriage. Let's take a bit of detour from those, shall we? Before you start hovering more around the title, I'll break the ice for you. I've been traveling a lot in the last few months. I know! I know! That's SO unlike me. No, not traveling like once to the Alps and then the next day to the Kandahars. I meant - traveling to home and then my second home back and forth. Hence, the concept of packing has been a little too --- well, let's just say I've a PhD in it by now. I'm sick of it. Tired of packing and unpacking. Even reached a point where I literally did not unpack certain stuff and just took it straight out from the bag after hours of searching my closets. Closet is a very fancy term for someone who stays in a PG but that's not the point! Coming back to packing - this time it's sort of a major step forward. Yep, I'm leaving Chennai. I'm moving back to the land where I was born. Initially, I was excited about it but then once I started thinking of all the stuff that I've to give up, I was disheartened (and this is a bit of an understatement!). My roomie and I were talking on what I've to give up and we came up with a bunch of stuff.

Roomie: When are you gonna start packing?

Me: I've sort of already started if you didn't notice.

Roomie: Uh huh. Where exactly have you started?

Me: Remember, how I threw away the eggs the other day..

Roomie: Wow, score! Throwing away the eggs - that's packing alright.

Me: No no, seriously. I'm freaking out. I've so much stuff and I'm only allowed like 20 Kgs of stuff that I can drag around.

*after a few minutes of silence*

Roomie: Relax! You'll be fine. Let's figure out what you can't take with you.

*she starts listing down*

Roomie: Bucket, mugs, laundry bag, plastic trays, cereal boxes...

Me: Whoa whoa, boxes? I've a lot of them. Would you like to take away the salt/sugar I've stored in 'em?

Roomie: Sure.

Me: I've got Surf Excel as well.

Roomie: Sure.

Me: You can keep the sandwich maker, btw.

Roomie: Sure.

Me: I've got some clothes as well.

Roomie: Nah, I'm good.

Me: I've got some moisturisers and shampoo bottles.

Roomie: Plural? I'll take them.

Me: You can use my tray, btw.

Roomie: Sure.

Me: My bed as well.

Roomie: I know.

Me: Yeah, you use that anyway when I'm not around.

Roomie: *grins*

*after an hour of waking me up from almost sleeping*

Roomie: Hey! You won't be able to drink or hangout with your friends anymore.

Me: Thanks for bringing that up. Let's just focus on goods in Chennai, shall we?

Roomie: You won't be able to talk to your friends on the phone at night either?

Me: Uh huh.

Roomie: You won't have time to watch movies on your laptop.

Me: Uh huh.

Roomie: You won't be able to hang up on your mom when she talks about marriage.

Me: Uh huh.

Roomie: You won't be able to order outside food much even when you're craving for it.

Me: Uh huh.

Roomie: You won't be able to reach home early just by walking from work.

Me: Did I do something to you? Go back to sleep!

The more I thought about it, she was actually right. I was so busy in planning on what I'm looking forward to that I almost forgot about what I'm gonna be giving up - My freedom! And it did suck but then silver lining to the rescue.

*waking her up*

Me: I will be able to cook my own food.

Roomie: Uh huh.

Me: I will be able to have fish every single day.

Roomie: Uh huh.

Me: I will be able to stuff my clothes into the washing machine and not worry about handwashing!

Roomie: Uh huh.

Me: I will be able to watch TV!

Roomie: Uh huh.

Me: I can get broadband connection and download movies in seconds.

Roomie: Uh huh.

Me: I will be saving on rent. :D

Roomie: *glares at me*

Me: I will be saving in general as well. :D

Roomie: Alright. I'm real sleepy.

Me: No more power cuts!

Roomie: Get your tush back to your bed!

More in my next post which will be written soon. *tongues out*

g(ROOM) under construction

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 15:18:00 +0000

We are back with the second part of Hitchy Business. Today, I’m gonna discuss on the process of groom hunting. I started thinking on how painful the entire process of arranged marriage has been painted in the Indian society. Just think of the time when you go to the market in the scorching heat to buy some vegetables. Let’s take tomatoes, shall we? Now, you’ll obviously not pick up any random tomatoes into your basket. What do you check? If they’re firm or soft or hard err let’s just say – you check on the texture. Anyway, enough of Tomato Talk! Instead of tomatoes, picture well groomed guys and instead of the heat there’s the pressure. No no, I’m not checking out the texture of those guys here. K But you’d certainly wish I was because the criterions that me + my parents + my friends + my environment have put into filtering out the right guys are much more difficult than just plain texture checking. :(

Even if I did rule out criterion, I’d still say finding THE ONE surely is taking it out of me. Honestly, it’s the only time I actually realized the importance of Love marriage. C’mon, finding a person who’s as freaky as you and getting hitched to ‘em? That’s truly a dream come true. And it rules out the interference of your family members into choosing your soul mate (if this exists!). I guess I wasn’t bright enough to see this coming my way.

I struck up with a very worry-some conversation with my roommate (we’ll give her a pseudo name Pinki) who’s also sailing in a similar boat as I am. The stink of it is the more we discuss about this, the more we realize that we’re entering into the snake pit.

Pinki: I used to worry about spending the rest of the life with a stranger. I never thought finding that stranger would take a lifetime.

Me: That’s painfully funny. So, didja like anybody?

Pinki: Sure. Well, there’s the guy who loves his dogs more than his family. Then, there’s the other guy who shaved off his head. Ofcourse, there’s the third guy who painted his profile with all his certifications.

Me: That bad eh?

Pinki: Well, it gets worse. People should really photograph well. What’s with the glares everywhere? Do they hate making eye contact with the camera?

Me: I’m sort of judging them a bit on their profile description as well.

Pinki: Well, how much can you judge a person by words..

Me: No no, trust me you can.

I came across this profile –

Profile description: WIFE WANTED DESPARATELY. HAVE TO GET MARRIED SOON. ONLY CHILD WITH A BIKE.

Pinki: Sure. The caps is too loud.

Me: Out of all the things, you came up with loud caps as the only problem with that description?!

Pinki: Life is sad, eh. But your parents are surely making it worse for you, girl.

She’s right though. My parents are surely taking an extra mile with this thing. It’s bad enough that I cannot find a decent guy and to garnish it with their silly wants is just making it better. I happened to like some guys and I’m about to discuss them with my mother and this is what happens..

Me: Mom! I think I found a nice guy. He’s working in a similar domain as I am. And he’s smart, good looking..

Mom: Is he a manglik?

Me: Sorry?

Mom: What’s his nakshatra?

Me: You’re talking to me right?

Mom: Did he score with you?

Me: Well, I haven’t really taken my relationship with him to that level, if you know what I mean..

Mom: I meant horoscope scores!

Me: Oh, that..

Mom: Also, check if he has siblings

Me: *silence*

Mom: Also, check if he is really as old as he claims to be.

Me: Well, he has hair on his head, if that counts for something.

Mom: Also, check..

Me: Mom, I’m sure he’ll check himself out with all the checking that you’re asking me to do.

*I hang up*

And that’s how my morning starts every day. I find a guy and my parents reject him. If they find a guy, I reject him. If we mutually like a guy, the Sun, Moon, Earth, Venus and probably even Pluto is waiting to reject him. Imagine losing a good guy because he has a friggin’ Pluto in his 8^th house.

If the above sounded all Greek to you, I’m talking about horoscopes which probably belongs to astrology. It’s this board game format with planets scattered across it.

I was talking to a friend the other day regarding this and I shocked him to his very core. I don’t blame him. Poor guy didn’t talk to me for a week!

Friend: Anaa! What’s new with you? You seeing someone?

Me: I’m seeing many, if that makes sense.

Friend: Wow, that happening eh?

Me: Yep, totally! In the afternoons, I talk to them. At nights, I score with them. In the mornings, I turn them down or vice versa.

Friend: Err, them?

Me: I can’t recall how many though..

Friend: Are you high? What are you talking about?

Me: I’m talking about guys.

Friend: Uh huh, sure you are. So you are with these guys like in a group?

Me: Oh no no, I try them one by one.

Friend: Wokay, I have to go. Let’s talk later, shall we?

Well, that came out wrong. Can you blame me though? I’ll be sharing my encounters with a gay guy, with a normal one, with a weirdo and also men from different communities/castes/races in the next post. Adios for now! I’ve got some selection and rejection to face.

Hitchy Business

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Wed, 20 Mar 2013 15:44:00 +0000

Well well well, here we are again with my stupid brain trying to do the thinking. I’ve been coaxed by my near and dear ones to write a post since I’m so frequent, if you know what I mean. The tragedy is that I don’t have to think on what to write anymore as my life has been a total drama for the past few months. Let’s share some of that here. Well, it’s that time of my life where I’ve to be wrapped inside a big dusty bag stuffed with some stocked up assets and kicked off to a place where people claim to be the end of ~~freedom~~ living. In case some of you bright minds missed that, I’m talking about marriage. That’s right – the great big Indian arranged psycho marriage phase has dawned upon me err my parents, I meant. I know you all must be tip toeing into asking me the very first question “How’s the groom hunt coming along?”. Brace yourselves! Before you get all excited about that part, I’ve a little bit of a tragedy over here to share with you. Remember the time when life was easier and you thought you could adopt dogs/raccoons or even a hot partner for a change? Well, apparently that’s out of the window and it got a lot more scarier than that. I’ve to adopt a human being for a lifetime. It doesn’t stop there. I’ve been getting dreams related to how disastrous this can get as well. Let me explain my dream now (yeah, I know I remember my dream! Boo you!). Anyways, back to the point. :/

Suddenly everything seems to be pointing towards marriage or everything I do has some connection to it.

I’m sitting at home trying to have homely cooked food.

Mom: Eat well. Try the fish. It’s good for your skin.

Me: Yeah, I know fish is good for the skin! Can I eat now?

Mom: Try licking the curry leaves as well. *pointing at the curry leaves inside the fish curry*

Me: Err, why exactly?

Mom: Oh, you’ll get a handsome boy if you do that.

*thud*

I slide into the next scene where I’m hanging out with my friends at a beach.

Friend: Oye lemme a click a snap. Go pose behind that tree.

Me: Dude, why a tree?

Friend: It’ll give a nice background for your matrimonial pics.

*boom*

I’m in conversation with my father on the phone

Dad: Do you know the three steps of face care?

Me: Err, yeah I guess..*before I start to explain*

Dad: It’s face washing, cleansing and..*interrupting him*

Me: Dad, I cannot believe I’m actually having this conversation with you. I don’t even talk about this with my gal pals for crying out loud.

Dad: Oh c’mon. You’ve to look good for the groom hunt.

*crash*

I’m talking to an old school friend (married)

Me: Girl, we don’t belong to the same boat anymore, do we?

Friend: Umm, why not?

Me: Cuz you’re always talking about..

Friend: Hold on! Lemme go check on the baby. I think he’s spitting up.

Me: Err, yeah. Exactly what I was talking about.

Friend: Alright, back! So what were you talking about?

Me: Nothing. Nevermind.

Friend: So, when are you getting married? You know life’s so different after marriage especially when..

Me: Can we talk about anything else besides babies and husbands and diapers or utensils inside the kitchen, please?

Friend: Jeez, calm down. I mean I do have to do the dishes but..

Me: OMG! Gah.

*digs into the ground to bury and cover self with mud*

Alarm rings as I’m trying to wake up but I don’t think I want to wake up. It’s just one of those wake up calls you get when everything around you is changing. The generation or even the people whom you used to know have suddenly transformed themselves into matrimonial oracles to help you get settled in an organized fashion. Dream’s over but reality hasn’t! Hence, we’ll proceed to the actual groom hunt and its side effects in the next post. ;)

2012: Let's do a quick review of myself

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:59:00 +0000

Mind & Heart - In the words of Ana, we're binding by the state of total forgetfulness, the following promises/resolutions made at the beginning of this year.

Slimming down.
Subscribing to the gym.
Being regular to the gy...*gets interrupted*

Me - Hey! Can we not fixate on the gym part too much? Now, what do we have next on the list?

Mind - Alright, the next items are:
Cutting down on junk.
Testing the true colours of some close friends.
Adopting a street dog.

Me: What? That's it?

Heart: No, you also mentioned that you'll break up with the ones that you don't gel well with.

Me: Which one?

Heart: No idea. You said ''ones''.

Me: Alright smartass, which ''ones'' ?!

Heart: I'm not the memory person here. Ask your mind!

Me: Well?!

Mind: What you looking at me for? I never liked the idea of breaking up in the first place.

Me: Nevermind. So, big deal if I wasn't regular to the gym or if I'm consuming a little too much of that junk. And those street dogs get really worked up after 1 AM. Now, I need a goodnight's sleep, you know.

Mind: You sleep at 3 AM everytime.

Heart: Well, she has friends to talk to, you big stone.

Mind: You really want me to start on you, Mr. Stone Heart?

Me: Alright, you two! Stop it. I know I didn't stick to my resolutions. Maybe, I'm not really a resolution fulfilling kind of a person, you know. Maybe, I'm good at other stuff. Stuff like..

Heart: Breaking hearts, breaking eggs before they boil, not picking up calls, deleting music to stuff in movies which you've never seen..

Me: Alright, not those kinda stuff! Stuff like...you know..

Mind: Oh! I know. Teasing people, teasing their accent, their fashion sense, ditching plans, not good at keeping secrets...

Me: Maybe, I should just NOT do the thinking. C'mon, you guys! I'm not that bad. I did make some new friends this year. I also learnt to make new dishes in my PG! I ended up saving some money and buying some cool gifts for my parents. I mean - that's a fun time eh?

Mind: What about the time when you promised yourself you'll save up for new years' and ended up spending that on a really lousy weekend?

Me: Well..you know..Alright, shut up! I may not be good at planning then.

Heart: Planning 'too'. *grins*

Me: *glares at heart* Yeah, thanks for adding that.

Mind: Anyway, now that the year is on its way to wrap up itself, why don't you become the softy you used to be and treat your friends and yourself nicely. Pick up calls, workout more and sleep less so that you have more time for yourself.

Heart: I can't do all that. Do you realize how much time it takes in managing all the veins and the pumping of blood?

Mind: I'm not talking to you, drill hole!

Me: Oh, right. Yeah, I guess I can do that. I'll try to be a better person. But my resolutions circle too much around me. Are you sure there isn't any else?

Mind: Well, there's the pet stuff but you cringed about that idea when you saw a dog taking a big poo..*gets interrupted again*

Me: ..Okay! Let's shush you now. Hehe. Let's not give out too much data here, shall we?

Mind: Alright, whatever. The story ended well with you cleaning up stuff and being a nice social worker, but whatever.

Heart: Ana! Just follow your heart. Don't let your mind rule everytime. If you wanna adopt that dog, I say go for it.

Me: Uh huh. Alright, folks! Thanks a lot for the briefing. So, we'll meet again in 2013.

Mind: IF it ever sees the light of the day.

Heart: You really think too much.

Me & Mind: We know. :)

Feasting like there's no tomorrow

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sat, 17 Nov 2012 17:27:00 +0000

Before I go ahead, I wanna say that this blog will not be shut down and has re-opened on the account of many requests. Also, the fact that it shows how stupid I am to have abandoned such a memorable site. Now, enough of that trash talk and let's get down to business, shall we? Let's ruffle up my life here in Chennai a bit more. Don't gimme the sympathy looks - I know you all enjoy reading stories on me facing situations where I totally make a fool out of myself.

The cook from our PG has decided to run away because she's afraid she has to please our appetite a little too much. Well, that's not really true. The truth is that we're a hungry set of girls. Hence, the demand for crispy hot dosas never go down unless we're served biriyani (google it!) for lunch, rotis (google it!) for dinner and more. It's dosas and idlis for all 3 meals. Sometimes, she used to feel sorry for our taste-buds and cook a very questionable Dal once in a blue moon.

Anyway, so I'm here to say that I actually miss the 5 star chef of our PG because the current situation is worse than I could imagine. My roomie and I keep checking on food every 5 minutes. Of course, we've to keep a check on when the power goes away because that really takes away the fun of fans in our rooms. I decided to have lunch today in my PG thinking that it's time to give Dominos and semi cooked bread a break. Oh, boy! That was a big mistake. As soon as the food arrives, I see girls taking multiple plates of food (not for themselves but for their roomies). How I wish I had such a doting roomie as well but I'm sure it comes with a price. It's really a mess when the food arrives because you've 2-3 items down on the table and when you're taking one, your eyes wander on the next one thinking it shouldn't be over before you go to take it. By the time, I go to take the next item, I suddenly can't seem to care enough about it because they all look the same. It's really a bunch of white rice surrounded by a mix n match or orange and red curries. We all know what a challenge that is to pick curries based on their colors.

I've decided to bring tiny portions of food during lunch and stock it for the night as well. Desperate? Not really. Hungry monkey? Right on!

Goodbye Muscles!

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Tue, 02 Oct 2012 15:24:00 +0000

You all must know that I’m good at bragging. It almost involves everything right from coming to work on a holiday or skipping junk for a week or doing anything I basically detest or that isn’t too comforting. Well, a person should get some credit for going through that pain, eh? Now, I’ve started going to this place which will probably make you pay for your own murder (quoting a friend) – yes, I’m talking about the gym.

It’s probably not as bad as it sounds but it’s definitely growing on me. One of the many experiences I’m going through right now is not having the ability to feel my arms or legs. Oh well, it’s fun for others as they get to watch me walk like Bambi (the baby deer) almost pretending to not fall down after the trainer keeps increasing the incline level on the treadmill that I was using.

Ever saw the look inside a chicken’s eyes when they’re just ~~caught off guard~~ or maybe totally expected by the butcher? Well, I’m one of those chickens in this gym where I try to make an excuse to go for a glass of water every now and then just to avoid my trainer from actually saying the words “Give me 10 more sets of push-ups, crunches or whatever comedy act they make me do”. Yep, I’m going to die in here. Just bear with my frequency of posts in not being so frequent because I probably am busy thinking of writing my obituary soon here.

The music is probably the only thing that keeps me going and distracted. There are these moments when I look into the mirror (which is placed in front of every cardio machines) and can see myself being cursed by those countless no. of pizza slices that I consumed. It feels like a sin which even a murderer wouldn’t commit.

That reminds me how heartbroken I was when I was being told what’s included in my diet. Of course, I my grin didn’t take much time to fade away when the trainer went from “eggs” to “only egg whites”. My meals include only oats. Ah well, a little bit of generosity was showered upon me as I’m allowed to have a bit of rice and wheat bread as well. BTW, what’s up with all the healthy food being ~~tasteless~~ not-so-tasty? Do you realize that if we had yummy food helping us in not putting on weight, the world would have fit and beautiful people all over? Never mind. :\

The quote: Don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time is very apt in my case these days.

Trying to save myself a tan!

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sat, 29 Sep 2012 08:38:00 +0000

Just so you all know, my life here in Chennai isn't a Disneyland ride. Now, of course, there's the talk of ''Who the hell asked you to go to that godforsaken city in the first place?" but I'm just going to gently avoid that. Who knows? Maybe someday the sun will be merciful and hear out my cries. Or let's just keep that in the bucket of distant dreams.

I've read and received tons of tips on how to save the skin from burning every single day I step out into the streets. My parents take the extra mile in being concerned and convenient so they just go the easy way of asking me to buy the goddamn umbrella. There's absolutely no problem in buying one but when you've to cross two-three main roads which BTW is NOT unidirectional. No wait, let me be more specific. The individual lanes themselves have parted them into a couple of more lanes which means you can expect ~~a truck~~ or a car (trying to reduce the level of horror) coming right at you from any direction. Hence,you see unless one really ensures that they're looking both-ways almost each step forward, one is bound to get hit and land up inside their umbrella probably. That's how I ruled out the ''umbrella'' concept.

Next option? Covering up myself like a terrorist! Alright alright, well just covering up myself. Apparently, that had a style as well. I ended up buying couple of stoles just for the sake of that. Why a couple? Well, some of them weren't accommodating lengthwise. And no, we girls don't always shop without thinking. Maybe sometimes. Anyways, coming back to the point! I, somehow, managed to learn to tie around the stole which covers my face, neck and well shoulders partially. What am I left with? Hands! (Oh, and legs as well). I can easily show multiple shades of rather fading shades of skin color on my arms, wrists and feet as well. Since, I've already done the damage to my skin, it's time to recover. Before I think of recovery, I must tell you it wasn't easy to just agree with the stole idea either. It just ~~spilled~~ spills water on my very little but conscious efforts on applying make up to work. Why? It gets washed and wiped away by the stole and Chennai sweat respectively anyway! No, carrying a make up box to work is really not an option that I look forward to.

I'm sure some of you must have some excellent ~~recipes~~ tips to make this save-the-skin-from-burning process easier. I hope it does not include "Leave the damn, city" or "Applying tomatoes all over my body". What? The latter one actually is an expert opinion.

Be understood as well as understand.

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sun, 09 Sep 2012 13:36:00 +0000

It's funny but that's the kind of situation I'm dealing with these days. My previous post was just a filler but I wanted to take my life seriously, which means each and every bit of it should be taken seriously - which also means that my blog gets counted in it. No more funny business with it. Anyways, back to the point. Ever since I came to Chennai (oh yeah, that's news BTW) - I've been trying to understand or make myself being understood.

With people - It has been a challenge dealing with people here. People aren't bad in Chennai. There, I said it. Not all of them are bad. Some really try to understand me and some..I had to try to understand. Let's take the rickshaw guys - they are sometimes hard to deal with but when they pop in the fuel/diesel worries, I totally cave in. :( BTW, I'm gonna beat up all my southern friends who never warned me about them. The first day I tried to catch an auto to go to Dominos, I had the longest conversation with the first tamilian. We discussed everything right from the fact that I'm not an alien from another planet to the fact that I want to go to the nearest store and not visit all the pizza stores in the city. Felt like I'm in an auction when it boiled down to the ''~~fear~~ fare factor''. We literally tried all combinations of

100 for one way

50-50 for both ways

40 for no ways

20 if he made me walk too much

And that's how it went on.

With accommodation - Another big pickle. Visited a few tenants but somehow the idea of a single girl who eats non vegetarian and hails from a city like Mumbai wasn't very pleasing for them. However, when they learned the fact that my parents will visit me from time to time (a big fat lie), they sort of settled down. Anyhow, I landed in a PG. There are tales you don't wanna know of.

With weather - I understand it's a coastal city and I've accommodated myself with that fact but the city can probably be a little gentle on the clothes when it downpours at unpredictable hours, or stop burning all of us to ashes.

With food - I've discovered million ways to cook without the use of an oven or a gas. All I needed was an electric kettle and a sandwich maker. No no, I do not cook maggi all the time. My roomie has inspired me to make khichdi in it as well. If you wanna know how - just ask me.

With language - I'm still learning the common terms. Just not into the bad words yet because even pronouncing a hello is making my mouth hurt.

Anyway, all of this has made my life in this city worth living with a bit of comfort if none at all.

I've cut down on a lot of things which I love like watching my favorite TV series, spending a little too much on things that I really don't care about, hanging out with friends (the very few I befriended here), traveling frequently to places nearby - all of this for saving time and money (which is never enough for a first job). All for what? Just so that I could share a part of my life with my readers. I've got some valuable feedback on my writing skills. I was asked not to write dialogues always and to portray my posts in the form of stories. I don't know how to do that yet but I guess I'm a big never ending chapter ;)

Learn to accustom yourself with situations and life will seem easy. Like I said - be understood and understand as well.

Beating around the bush.

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sat, 08 Sep 2012 16:05:00 +0000

Instead of trying to act all smart, I admit I've run into a writer's block or a blogger's block. There are two reasons for that - I've stopped thinking, or I think all the time but I'm too busy to jot them down for you guys. Just to self-motivate myself, I ended up creating multiple blogs which only took a second but the whole day/noon-naps went into deciding what should I name my new blog, what should the colors be, the look of the template and all that jazz. Guess I was just trying too hard to not think on the lines of the actual content. It's funny that I'm out of content because stupid things keep happening to me always and I know people love reading about those.

Hence, I decided to write about this block in my mind till I unblock the block. Umm? Makes any sense? No, right? That's what I'm talking about. I'm going to write on things that do no make sense anymore. I know you guys must be hmph-ing in your head going "Girl, when did you EVER write sense?!" but hey - I'm serious. Let's just stall for a while till I hit a note or maybe get tips from you all on what to write on. I'm an expert in stalling, believe me. I've been doing this to my parents for a while now whenever they bring up the marriage talk. I've also used this on many guys when they popped up ''the'' question. No, not that question.

What I'm trying to say is that it's okay to beat around the bush. If you did read this till here then I'm sorry to say it was an absolute waste of time. Now, go back to fishing/chatting/pulling your own hair or just resting your cheeks on your palm.

At least, I wrote something. *sheepish smile*

The power of closure

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Mon, 25 Jun 2012 09:57:00 +0000

The world keeps cribbing about all good things coming to an end...How about the fact that some bad things also come to an end? I wanted to write this post for a while now. My readers - whoever you are, wherever you are, you must have been reading my blog on/off. I haven't been in the best of mindsets and shapes lately. No making fun on the ''shapes'' aspect - I'm curvy and I like it. The reason? There were some major relationships lying pending without any answer or let's just use the term ''life''. Without any life! Sounds good enough? I wanted to give them a life either by defining them that where it stands or how it should stand. I know it's not always important to give everything a meaning and one should just leave it as it is but sometimes it's very important to discuss certain things and get it out of the system.

Damages always kick in when one relationship affects the other and then that goes on and on. It's a chain reaction, you see. I won't call it a vicious cycle because every relationship deserves a certain amount of respect.

I took my loved ones for granted for people who took me for granted. Most of us do that unknowingly or maybe purposely. I just got closure from two most major people in my life because their actions/life affected mine in every way till date. I also found out that my best friend's mother is no more in this world (i still cannot believe that it's actually true). And to top all this, I talked to my baby sister after years just to hear her bickering on how sad life is. Not even a courtesy "Hello or How are things?".

You know what the best part was? I am not feeling that tinge of pain which I feel after anything sad or surprising happens. I never expected certain changes which did take place recently and I'm still okay. I'm still here writing this post. I'm still here thinking that it's okay to blog about it and get some sympathy or company. I was wondering if I've become a stone or have I become matured? Is God helping me to motivate myself so much that I actually look forward in life to set things right and not hurt people who love me anymore just because of my own problems?

One answer: Maybe.

I don't feel anything anymore. No, I'm not numb. I'm happy I don't feel anything.

But I did learn one thing for sure - Some people don't deserve the truth and some don't deserve to be lied to.

Everything is momentary

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 04:10:00 +0000

The feeling of nostalgia doesn't really let go of things that I'm close to. It feels like just yesterday when I came to Pune for university studies and it's all over now. This was like one of those *poof* moments when everything is over in a jiffy.

Tears are rolling down my cheeks..My heart's kinda numb...My eyes are...Wait a second! I'm not insane. None of those things are happening to me. Well, it did a few days ago but now I'm living in a bubble of fear. Eventually, this fear is going to eat me up because I'm letting it sink in. Trying to find something that actually stays with me forever is like an impossible task. The problem lies with me. I'm letting go of things so easily that I end up blaming the things which are gone. This taken for granted attitude has got to stop.

If things like friendship, love, phases, life, people, jobs and even cute pets - are all temporary then there's nothing to fear right? Because I know all of it is going to end someday. I might as well enjoy every moment.

The bad times are temporary - great! Hence, look forward to the good ones.

The good times are temporary - so live these times like you've lived never before.

I can only preach myself till the extent I want to be preached. Truth is I haven't even started preaching myself.

Now, don't feel sorry or miserable for me. I'll bounce back someday.

Get your presentation skills right

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 14:32:00 +0000

No, really! This one was coming anyway from my end. I figured I'm doing an MBA so I might as well learn and at-least let others know what are the ''Do's and Don't s" while making, giving your presentation. Alright, let's just do the Don't s because nobody likes to hear what one should do. It's like the time in F.R.I.E.N.D.S when Rachel yells at her Sister Jill:

Jill: Don't tell me what I should do

Rachel: I'm not telling you what to do, I'm telling you what NOT to do.

Whew, I know I can't get over that soap but let's get back to the point. A few basic pointers where people go wrong and I've seen this over and over again and today it just hit me that I wanted to take a big ball of stone and hit someone. I'll calm down but before I do, let me just get it out of my system.

Does anyone understand the significance of bullet points? I mean not ACTUAL bullet points, you know. They're supposed to be key ~~pointers~~ words that'll help you remember the rest of the what you're going to speak to the audience.

Oh, btw, there's a set of creatures called the ''Audience''. You need to look at them while presenting. No no, they would not want to see your butt, your side-pose, your ~~hairy~~ arms, your hair or anything else. All they would like to see is your face. Yes, remember face and if they aren't paying attention, it's probably you aren't as pretty or peaceful to look at. I'm just kidding about that bit but face the audience while you deliver your presentation. By deliver, I do not mean walk into the podium like a postman, deliver the mail and run! Deliver slowly and gradually by making all your point very valid and understandable. Let me be honest with you: I am horrible at delivering a good presentation. In fact, I am worse than a postman. At least, the postman comes and stays with you for a while, takes your signature and all. I probably would deliver my presentation in a jiffy and leave. Did I confuse you guys with the postman and the presentation too much? Fine, sorry. The bottom line is to never rush through the points but speak clearly.

When I talk about speaking here, I mean speak and not over-emphasize every point or try to pull each word like a strand of rubber till the point it breaks. Don't be so slow in delivering your speech that you make the audience as well the mentor who is assessing go off to a snoring ride. Be crisp but not as crisp as the bullet points on your slides. If you just plain read what your slide ~~speaks~~ has in it, you're just trying to insult the audience by depicting that they're blind and that they wanna hear what's on the slide. Bring out your own points.

Can people please please please avoid theories on their slides? It's high time that one realizes that slides are meant to be more of a guide to help you out when you're speaking so that you don't stammer or pull on a lot of ''Oh, Umms and Aahs". Who the heck would wanna read an entire piece of theoretical paragraph on the slide? You can try that if you think your face is that uninteresting to look at, divert the audience to the slides. I mean if that's your agenda but the key to a good presentation is to make people see your face and hear what you're speaking (and not any rubbish).

And also, make sure what you speak does match with what's on your slide behind you. Yes, it is embarassing when there's a donkey posing on the slide and you're busy talking about cats. Or worse, you bring out an elephant when there's absolutely no sign of that giant on your slide. To some level, it's acceptable that you talk about some stuff which is not present on your slide but going overboard is just plain stupid. A small reference would help.

Watch the time! - Yes people, you do not have all the time in the world to deliver what you wanted to present. For that maybe you should really pay the audience to listen to you because trust me listening skills don't come for free after a while. With mothers, it's a different story but not with people who're trying to present on a topic that has been probably been presented on many-a-times before.

Voice modulation - It really helps a lot of people. I think that's the key to a good speaker too. But who said you've to be the best? Just be audible. When I mean audible, I don't mean to yourself, I meant ''be audible to your audience''. Don't scream because you may wanna buy them hearing aids and that's not a very good deal. Don't be too subtle -- it never helps! Don't be afraid of being heard. Relax, they won't kill you. They probably are just as dumb as you are. (this was just to make you feel better)

Did I miss out anything? If I did, pardon me. I'm human too, hence, I tend to forget every though that gets recollected in this teeny tiny brain of mine. I won't lie to you all but I make most of the blunders I've written above but I'm trying my best to improve. I suggest everyone starts doing the same or else someday the reason of people getting fired from their job would be just an embarassing boring presentation excuse. Now, you wouldn't want that on your recommendation letter stating ''Good player, Bad speaker'', do you?

I blabber but I too get bored

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 17:13:00 +0000

Well, since my last post had done a lot of bashing on the toppers and the people who love to study, I figured I bash myself up a bit this time. It's not so much of a self-criticism per se but more on the lines of wanting-to-improve-but-failing-big-time! I blabber a lot. My ~~friends~~ listeners, parents have complained a lot on this habit of mine. I'm an excellent listener to a stranger and exactly the opposite to someone I know very well. Now, you know the trick to getting the listening side from me - Don't get too acquainted with me. Before I go on to explain how much I blabber, some of you must be out there trying to prototype me into being a ''girl''. Yeah, I know you must be going on like, "You're a girl! Of course, you'll blabber a lot." It's almost as corny as the ''99% sound and 1% sense" joke. To be honest, that one did hurt but I'm glad we girls inspire people to come up with such creative jokes at times. Anyways, don't wanna divert from the topic.

Oh yes, I've been literally asked to shush by almost everyone? Yes, everyone. I mean I remember even a KID asked me to shut the hell up once upon a time. Yes yes, I believe I was that annoying. It's not the annoyance so much but more of the constant ''BLAH" material that I throw upon people! I don't ask questions. I don't answer them either. I just don't let others speak when I'm around. I remember ~~I was trying to~~ a friend was trying to have a conversation with me about Samosas. Let's call her 'L'. I don't want to take her name here because she might come down here and actually bring out my other bad habits. But today is just about my Blabbering.

L: Hey, you know I had some amazing Samosas in Bombay. I think they use some secret ingredient in their fillings or..

Me: I know! I know. I mean they top it off with green chutney! And the best part is that they put yummy aloo ki sabzi (cooked potato fillings) inside it. In calcutta, they put peas, carrots and almost all kinds of vegetables.

L: Wow, really? That must be..

Me: Yeah yeah, it's disgusting. I mean to think of it, I actually love food in calcutta but the samosas and the fillings.. Argh and *insert a lot of blah-ing about samosas*

*it's been over 5 minutes*

Somehow, I've been talking about food and all the other kinds of food dishes in Calcutta and there's no stopping me and I fail to notice that L has gone silent all this while.

Me: Oops, did I speak too much?

L: Nah, it's.. I'm used to it.

Me: So, what were you saying?

L: I don't even remember.

Yeah, I hate it when that happens.

Now, the challenge here is that I'll make an excellent talkative moron and probably the worst person at a debate. And I have made many girls ''shut up'' just because of me talking my dash out. Don't even bother asking the guys what I do to them. They're just too nice to listen to me because of the whole ''respect-her-because-she's-a-~~girl~~ (or creature, if I may?). I guess my talkative nature is very reflective in my posts too. :|

The secret to shut me up is to offer me a nice dish once in a while or some candies maybe. What? You think it's easy to just blah nonsense forever? Some people find it entertaining and cheer up because of my crap.

The Topper Syndrome

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 15:05:00 +0000

Relax, I'm not a topper. I'm glad I'm not. You wanna know why? There are some crazy species out there. They know what their ~~ultimate~~ penultimate aim is and they work towards it. Well, these people are the reason why you see yourself far away from the top 10, top 50 or worse top 100 in the list of best students or why you get that horrible yelling from your mother and you end up having an hour argument defending yourself and explaining as to why you cannot be compared to the ~~coolest~~ lamest topper kid in your class. They are also the reason why your open house days in school always sucked grease. They can be also blamed for your very fluctuating or let me call the famous ''CGPA" performance. Don't be disheartened. There are millions who fear them. I'll classify them in some categories that I've visualized the most in my life.

The Hard Workers - Oh, come on now. Did you really think I wouldn't give you guys some respect? I respect you. I respect you a lot. In fact, I respect you till the point that I fail to respect you and find it difficult to believe that how do you manage to achieve such amazing performance in all your academics. You guys are the same who get interviewed by the media sometimes whenever you achieve the state or the city or the country champion award. To be honest that interview freaks me out. There's a mention of ''no lights'', ''no food'', ''no coaching/guide/tuitions'', ''no resources/books'', ''no money'' and sometimes ''no stationery items''. I'm not mocking you guys. I'm just saying that the motivation you guys get to study and reach the top position by hook or by crook is what is ...I don't know what. What pisses me off is you guys already win the first rank and after that the whole sympathetic story that goes on -- like we're supposed to feel bad for you that you went through all that hell. Why does every ranker have some or the other sad story out there? Is it not possible to get a good rank even if you come from a well-to-do family and have absolutely no hurdles at all? I believe it is the brain at work and not the other issues that leads you to the topmost position. Oh wait, you had a troublesome maid maybe? Nice try of using such stories to win a scholarship. It doesn't work forever though.

Well, I guess then the saying of "Every winner has a tragedy behind it'' must be true.

Exception - Some of you are geniuses. You automatically have the best-brains and understand a concept in a minute. Yeah, I envy you guys. It's like what some people would like to call? A gift from birth. Wow, I must say that's the best of deals. Or, is it?

The Vomiting Birds - Let me talk to you guys for a second. No offense but do you NOT have brains? I mean it must be pretty challenging and remembering every single ~~sentence~~ word exactly the way it is written or depicted in the books/notes. I know some of you even remember the page numbers just in case by creating a photographic memory of the references in your mind. It's like creating a virtual notebook in your head. It stays only till the exam. One question regarding what you studied after the exam and you act like an Alzheimer's bird. What's that about? Of course, it helps in getting the output -- MARKS!

The All Rounder Freaks - You guys wanna be good at everything. When I mean everything, I mean everything. Topping in everything -- right from maintaining a good body to being a good sports person to being an amazing artist to being a great academician to being a great what-not. Sometimes, you forget the part of being a good friend. Well, if you do, you would have to compromise and let your friends win sometimes too and you're not going to let that happen eh?

The Hidden Miracles - Yes yes, I'll call you guys miracles because you guys just HAPPEN to get good marks after acting all normal like the other students. I can count multiple things here.

Yes, you lie when you say you haven't started studying

Yes, you lie when you say you haven't understood anything

Yes, you lie when you say your paper went bad. -- like seriously?!

Yes, you lie when you say you don't know squat on the day of the exam

Dude, we know you're studying your dash out at nights or during the day or whenever you find any free time. Probably, in the washrooms too. Although, that's a little crazy. And to top it all, when the results come out, you act like it's some sort of a miracle that just happened. What's crazy is this miracle happens only to you guys over and over again. If asked genuinely, you guys respond by calling it a ''mistake''. I gotta tell you -- that's a well planned mistake.

The TMI birds - You always have to occupy or surround yourself with too much information. If we have one book assigned to us, you have to get hold of every reference book that leads to the subject. Be it a magazine, a website, a journal, a blog, a video -- the maximum resources possible. You call it the knowledge gain? I call it plain crap. It's just another way to manipulate and add extra dump in your exam paper to play around with the examiner's head. The concept of ''the more the better'' - it actually works with a lot of examiners. But there's always going to be a debate about quality vs quantity.

Yes, I know bashed you all a lot and we can do all these things too to get good marks. I don't need marks. Well, to be honest, I'm too lazy to do all these things that you guys do. :|

P.S: I do respect those people who get good marks and never brag about it or how difficult it was for them to get in and help others to score better as well.

Blame the bed, not me.

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 14:19:00 +0000

That evil wide long thing standing on four legs with a delicate mattress resting on it and some incredibly soft pillow calls out to me, "Get back here you! You know you need me."

Let me be honest. I'd probably not spend SO much time with even my special someone as much as I spend on my bed. And there's no this bed or that bed or my bed. When I see a bed, I know it's time to sleep. In fact, I even sit on it and study because it's just easier to go to sleep when I get bored of books which happens all the time.Not to mention the time when I'm already in my bed but I don't feel like sleeping. Whether I'm asleep or not, it doesn't matter! The amount of lethargic air that my bed pumps into me is what makes me so lazy.

Lazy is very undefined there. Let me define it for you.

Too lazy to get up and switch off the fan when I'm freezing cold.
Too lazy to get up and actually put the covers back on me when they're lying around my feet. I almost do kung fu on my bed just to kick back those covers on me.
Too lazy to go to the washroom --> This one's pretty famous with everyone, I guess? Hence, the bad habit of not drinking water before hitting the bed even though I make everyone hear that suggestion from me everytime.
Too lazy to get up and search for the water bottle when thirsty
Too lazy to even look at the phone sometimes (when there's a message or a call alert)
Too lazy to look at the time.
Too lazy to turn off the alarm. It's just easier to slap all over my pillow and search frantically for the goddamn phone.
Too lazy to get up from bed :| (Exception: Winter mornings. I won't blame my bed. I myself don't feel like getting up then.)

I've a bad feeling I'm falling asleep because I'm sitting on my bed and typing out this post.

So, if you think I'm lazy, it's not my fault. Blame the bed!
P.S: Even a comfortable couch is a culprit. Actually, any place with a seat. Alright alright, I love sleep! :|

Bold & Upfront

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 19:52:00 +0000

When I started blogging, I was going through a hazy phase of my life. I was disconnected from almost everyone I knew and I was isolated. It did work as a therapy for me. But this was two years ago. A lot has changed since then. You can get a hint of those two years if you go through my Old Blog. The sad part since then is that everything and everyone I knew has changed. Changed is like an understatement but life has moved on and given everyone a fresh new start. I thought I was left out but I wasn't. This is where we fail to realize that not only other things change but we change with time too. I changed too and I realized that when I started seeing the change in others. I started blaming them, making false assumptions, got depressed and blamed myself a lot of times because honestly...Who the hell likes change? Unless, it's a pretty dress or a new dish or a new game. Well, let's not get into that. When it comes to the critical elements in life -- the change in those seems very challenging at first but eventually everyone learns to roll on with it with time. I don't know if I have moved on yet from whatever happened in the past but I surely know that knowing the change in others, I'm slowly getting the motivation to forget and move on.

Friends, know this that nobody is a better doctor for you than you are. Not even time. Time can probably heal you but it will still remind you of the other happier times and memories that were fond of or even disliked. But when it comes to you, only you know what you want and whether you want to forget it or brood over it. Before I go all you-ing and finger pointing again, I wanna tell you about myself. I have started to accept those changes. It wasn't easy but I have. Sometimes, it gets a little challenging knowing that you'll be reminded of the past but I've learnt to not let that affect me anymore. The sooner everyone does that, the better for them. The phrase ''Ignorance is bliss'' is indeed a true statement. If not in the short run, one will realize it in the long run.

Let's not regret anything that has been lost or has happened in the past and look to a better change. How can we make the world a better place? By putting a GIANT smile! So, let's SMILE! Allow everyone else to smile. It's contagious ;)

On a rhyming note

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 09:43:00 +0000

I loved you
Then I lied to you
About time and other things too
Dawn of the realization came upon me
A little late than never to be
Made me see the reality
That I actually missed you
I shouldn't have lied to you
Doesn't matter what has faded away
It's high time to kick away
Cheers to the same old life
With a sparkle similar to the shiny knife
And here I am waiting to scribble again
On only you and forever... AMEN!

Shoo-ing away awkwardness

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 18:20:00 +0000

You ever had that feeling of being in an elevator and feeling awkward about that silence that dawns upon you till your floor comes? Well, I always get it. It's weird and I know there's nothing I can do about it. I can't speed up the elevator to reach the damn floor. I just have to stand there and bear the silence with a bunch of strangers and wait till my floor shows up. Now, my life had become that elevator. Everything was silent. Everyone was a stranger. Popping up weird questions like "How's your pet rabbit?" made things worse. What made things easier? Be okay with everything that's going on. In fact, the more I apply my head into things, the complicated it gets. My nature doesn't give up. It works too hard on finding out the details of all the What(s), Why(s), How(s). I had to let them go. Well, do I feel better? Of course. Is this what I wanted? Maybe not but my brain gets less tired. Be happy for that!

From now on, the gossip town of all the troubles will come to an end. It'd probably range from conversations like, "Remind me why did we NOT talk for so many days again?" to "Hey, what's new with you man?"

Alright, fine, they weren't exactly ''gossipy'' kinds but you know what I mean. Never bother much with the details and just move on. Or, in short, be like a ''guy''. :P Okay, I hope I don't get stones thrown at me by boys for this.

Keep smiling. I'll try to write a lot more.

There's always a first

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 04:32:00 +0000

First time of everything seems weird but can be pretty exciting as it counts to be a new experience. Yup, you can say that it has been happening with me a lot lately. Just yesterday I celebrated Diwali in my college campus for the first time away from home. I thought it'd be awkward but watching all the firecrackers and bombs light up the sky was the greatest feeling ever. It's a thing about India - no matter wherever you are, you always get to celebrate the joys of every festive season with people around you.

Hope you all had a great Diwali! God bless us all. :)

Judge yourself instead of being judged by others

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 16:20:00 +0000

I hate it when that happens. When I'm serious, people ask me to stop taking tension and be cool. When I actually play it cool, people ask me to grow up and be serious in life. Lesson? People always talk but you do what you wanna do!

Sounds kinda brutally stupid, doesn't it? I say if you wanna break that gate of your pathetic neighbors, go do it. If you really wanna go tell your ex girlfriend that she's with a wimp, go tell her. Why think of consequences then? What's the worst thing that can happen? People would consider you rude or a horrible person? Well, big surprise, they'd consider that you are one ten or twenty years down the line anyway. All it will take is one stupid action from your side. That's gonna be the day when they'll forget all the good deeds you've done. Hence, screw the Mr. Goody Shoes in you and do what you want. It's a short life and you may end up being someone else just for pleasing others instead of being yourself and that's just plain stupid. Sure, a little bit of adjustment here and there to accommodate people in your life is always better but don'\t overdo it. Don't be completely ignoring the innate yourself just so that others like you better. If they cannot deal with who you are or how are you then screw them. It's better to survive alone than to survive with people constantly judging you or telling you what you should be and what you shouldn't be.

Honestly, you know the best what you are doing or the kind of person you are. I mean c'mon, don't tell me that you do something horribly wrong and think you did a great job. It may not be a quick realization sometimes but you do learn it eventually, don't you? So why wait for others to tell you or let them change you beforehand? Be your own boss.

Look at dogs for a minute. Let's take a bloody second and look at dogs! Now, what's wrong with them? Nothing. They go lick everybody. They go growl at every person. They are happy with a bone and they don't care if a big fat alligator or a baby threw the bone at them. What I'm trying to say is if dogs can be themselves and what they are then so should humans. They don't change their characteristics or nature. All they do is adjust themselves around us. How? Adjust themselves with the food we provide them. Adjust themselves with the crappy names we give them. Adjust themselves with the priority we give them. They get sad too. They are unable to express it and that's why we take them for granted. Does that mean they care such a great deal about it? They forget it the very next moment they see you and come and lick your face off!

So for the sake of hecks, care but don't overdo it because you'll be termed as a dinkus in the end or treated like dog-shit someday. Don't forget yourself or who you are. It's just not worth anyone in this world.

I posted some crap after a long time because I was frustrated with myself and not with this blog or life in general. Can't I rant? I don't care if you guys think I'm too whiny. That's how I am. But I do care that you guys care to read this space.

My 50th post.

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Sun, 10 Jul 2011 05:38:00 +0000

I wanna thank everyone who kept reading this space even when it was damn irritating.

Thanks to my precious fans too who took the pain to follow me!

You all get a big hug from me on my 23rd birthday.

LOVE YOU ALL! <3

The Impossible Gift Idea

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Thu, 07 Jul 2011 05:56:00 +0000

What's more heartbreaking? When a person breaks your heart or a person dismisses your gift that you've spent months on trying to make it perfect? Duh! The latter one. Imagine to have to live through that moment of guilt and anger till the person is done talking ill about your gift.

Let's take Jack and Jennie for example here. Now, Jack spent months trying to get Jennie the perfect gift. What did he get her? A custom made barbie doll that says ''I love you, Jennie'' in its own colorful ways.

Jack: So didja like it?

Jennie: Mmm. Uh hmm. Mm.

Jack: Hehe, err what's wrong?

Jennie: No, I loved it. I mean who won't like a doll that says your name, I mean..

Jack: *has a puzzled look on his face*

Jennie: I mean who wouldn't like to see a barbie say your name! I mean this is exciting, I mean..

Jack: Erm, honey?

Jennie: Yeah?

Jack: You know the old classics like "It's a really nice gift'' is still OKAY!

Jennie: Yeah, I know. But nice would just mean nice. I wanna say that it's nicer, you know. I wanna say..

So this went on. Finally, Jack understood that she didn't like the gift and Jennie came out with the truth that it's a lame gift.

The challenge is to decide the perfect gift by not putting much thought into and just come up with a random idea. Here's the part which gets tricky! Now, there are SOME people who already own everything. Let's take a ''guy'' for example. He'd always give you the I-already-have-a-watch thing on your face, you know. Whereas, it's always always easier to get a girl chocolates. You get her a pack of Cad bury and she'd go crazy on them. Gifts that are consumable are easier than the gifts that'd make a permanent stay in one's lives.

Let's take my dad for example. I mean now that I'm getting a nice stipend, I thought it'd a great idea to get my parents some nice gifts first, you know before I go around spending it on myself or my favorite dogs across the street. The conversation never goes well with my father. My mother is easily convinced. She'd take anything I wanna get her but dad...

Me: Dad! Dad! How about I get you a coat?

Dad: No, thanks. I already got one.

Me: Oh...Then how about a nice watch?

Dad: I've a watch that's working for 15 years. (there comes the stats. 15 years of watch experience, 10 years of shoe experience and what not)

Me: Ohh-kay! How about I get you a nice pair of Ray Ban eh?

Dad: I already got a better brand of the Police.

Me: What about shirts? Let me buy you a shirt and trouser set?

Dad: Got too many of them, dear.

Me: *I get mad obviously* Alright, so let me get this straight. You already have everything that I'm willing to afford within my reach. So there is absolutely nothing that I can buy you?

Dad: Oh well, I don't know..

Me: How about I get you a nice dinner?

Dad: You mean if you cook yourself? Sure.

See? That's the key. Consumable gifts!

Now that I think about it I never cared about the idea behind the gift. I don't want a huge building with diamonds on it. You get me a pair of earrings and I am happy. You get me some chocolates and I am happy. And I'll never give you the - I've had chocolates for 10 years (stats) ! I'm speaking for myself here because I've known both girls and guys who give each other a hard time regarding gifts. So the key here is to get something that can be finished within minutes and cannot be said no to (irresistible)

Couple of pointers -

Food

Food again.

Movie Tickets

Oprah Tickets

Lottery Tickets (alright, this one's lame)

Take a Trip together!

And if you're thinking of something that'd be a permanent gift then get a picture of that person's family members including that person in it and get it photo-framed! What? Family's gonna stay forever!

Family Anecdotes

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 12:01:00 +0000

Scene: Morning call for breakfast at home
Mom: There's bread and peanut butter
Me: Noooo
Mom: There's puffed rice and some snacks
Me: Noooo
Mom: There's corn flakes
Me: Chocolate flavoured?
Mom: Umm, no normal ones
Me: Then, noooo
Mom: Alright, that's all we have at home
Me: Nooo
Dad: *as he passes by my room* You know people who miss breakfast grow fat
*I rush to the kitchen as soon as I hear that*
Mom to Dad: How do you manage to do that?
Dad: You gotta pick your battles.

Scene: Me and my dad are watching some bollywood song dance
Me: Oh, good. Another song in the middle of the movie. Exactly why I prefer english movies
Dad: I always thought the junior artists are cuter than the main artist.

Scene: Deciding what's gonna be for dinner.
Me: I want a gravy dish.
Dad: I want a curry dish.
Mom: So, what should I make?
Me: GRAVY!
Dad: CURRY!!
Mom: Aaand curry it is.
Me: Why do I always forget in an argument that you'd take your husband's side!

Scene: Venting on life.
Me: I want some freedom! I am not 16 anymore. Why can't I just go out and get some fresh air?!
Dad: There's a park right by our building.
Me: That's great :D *I hurry to go get dressed*
Mom: Honey, on the way back, could you please get some peas and onions, a jar of mustard and..
Me: *I glare at mom* AND?
Mom: Umm, and a can of mushrooms? *grins at me*

Scene: Having dinner at home.
Me: *halfway through dinner* Argh! Why can't we order KFC or McD or some nice chinese?
Dad: *while eating* Because by the time they reach, the food becomes cold.
Me: Then why don't we go and eat outside?
Dad: In this weather and traffic? Are you kidding?
Me: When you didn't have a car, that used to be your excuse. Now, you have a car and the weather is your excuse?
Dad: I never said I'm buying a car for a hunger ride. *keeps munching*
Me: Then why'd you buy a car if we can't go outside at all?
Dad: Honey, it's for official err office purpose.
Me: :|

Scene: Dad talking on the phone.
Dad: Alright, peter. Will see you in the office and talk about it tomorrow.
Dad: *about to hang up* Hmm. Mmmm. Alright. Alright
Dad: *listens to some more* Okay. Okay. Bye!
Dad: *responds to another query* Well, we'll talk tomorrow on this.
Dad: *finally hanging up* Ooookay. BYE!
Mom to Dad: Perhaps you should wait till the other person finishes before you hang up.
Dad: That's the only way to let the other person finish ASAP!

Scene: A normal discussion
Me: Hey, you guys, why am I the only child?
Dad: It's hot! I better go take a shower. *rushes to the bathroom*
Mom: I've got something on the oven. Lemme check.
Me: *to myself* Ask a question just to shoo them away. :|

We all have a crazy family. It's the craziness that makes it fun, innit?

A letter to me from my childhood.

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 06:46:00 +0000

Dear Anamika,

First of all, I'd like to say ''Hahahahahahahahahaha!". Confused? Well, you know you're a big dinkus, right? You should know that. Great job growing up by the way. And why on earth do you make people call you ''Ana''. I remember when you were little people used to call you Anamika or Mona. I mean what's wrong with that now? Both are really good names. Stop being such a wannabe and trying to fit in better.

And what's with all the emotional crap? Remember that things are simple. Treat others the way you want to be treated. Why do you have to go out of your way to impress or depress someone just because you think it's the ''right'' thing to do. BTW, we also need to talk about right and wrong. Let me tell you that life is the same as it was back when you were little. It's you who has changed. It's you who made all the choices. If you made a booboo, then suffer! Why cry about it?

I looked much prettier than you too. I don't know what you eat or sulk yourself into. Look at your hair! Mine was so much better. People even adored me. Nobody tried to give me all the lifelong advise. I was a good girl and most importantly a naive girl. Why are you such a cunning little masquerading pest?

On the parents thing - since when did mom and dad become hell for you? No, answer me. When you were little, they protected you from all those evil neighbours and that big dood with a bat who was coming to hit you or the rich girl who made you cry with all her pride. They love you and they don't keep 10000 conditions before you. It's not like they asked you to clean the dishes or make the bed everyday. You were the sweet little princess and you owe them for that by not cribbing 24/7.

Freedom, my ass! What freedom are you talking about? Going out and meeting your friends and having a lovely time with them? Well, I did it too and they never stopped me. What's stopping you? Only that I never returned after 11 or 12. I came home back at 8. Alright, I grant you 2 more hours. Come back home by 10! I bet they'll not stop you from meeting your friends.Well, I never made friends with strangers. If you do and don't tell your parents about it, I guess that answers why your freedom was snatched away from you.

For god's sake, exercise, woman! I used to ride the cycle everyday! I used to go running. Heck, I even fell into the gutter while playing hide and seek with my friends. Remember how my hands used to pain after playing badminton for long hours with my best bud? What happened to you? Sitting at home, staring in front of the screen, hooked on to your stupid Facebook! I managed to survive without social networks. I made friends in real life. Why can't you?

I'm a lot jealous of you. I didn't have many things which you have today and still I was happier than you are today.

I could never make my legs reach the ground and the waiters had to get me extra cushions for me to reach the table at the restaurant. Do you remember how embarassing that was for me? You don't have to deal with that now.

My cousins used to make a fool out of me asking to me to pray from Santa till I realized he doesn't exist. You don't have to wait up all night waiting for the fat round man to bring you apparent gifts.

My parents banned me from taking to a movie because it was an adult film. I stayed home with granny having coconut cookies and staring at the sky, cursing my parents to the core! You don't have that obligation. You don't get to curse your parents for not taking you an adult movie because you CAN go for it. Oh, wait. They never took you? Why would they? You're a sad wuss.

I could never wear jeans or write with pens or wear nail paints to school! You can do those things.

I couldn't watch the late night cartoon shows because it was past my bedtime! You can watch more than late night cartoon shows if you know what I mean!

Hence, for once stop trying to think that you're a loser because you achieved all those things which I could never achieve! These teeny tiny achievements -- they count missy!

And what's with all the heartbreaking story? If you love someone, stick with that person. You don't have to be in love with 10-12 guys and then choose. What do you think this is? The princebowl for the princess? Just love and be loved. Be free like me! Be cute like me!

Most importantly, don't kill me. Trust me, you need me. Not only for my great ideas, but for giving you a constant reminder that you've won many battles!

Now, go blog this out to the world. See? I couldn't even blog back then! DARN YOU! Lucky rat!

Love,

Your sweet little yourself

*evil grin*

Don't sell your thoughts!

noreply@blogger.com (Ana) — Fri, 17 Jun 2011 15:49:00 +0000

Go ahead. Judge me all you want! I never liked the idea of having blog contests worth insert-some-price-here bucks. If you want money, then let's do something meaningful with it or for it. Like cleaning the roads of our neighborhood or buying some medicines for the stray dogs who've been wounded for years or feed the hungry and the poor.

But writing some cooked up story or some words that will blow others minds which you'll never ever do them in real life just for a great prize is just plain rubbish. Some say that actions speak louder than words. It's the same thing with our writing. Sure, it's easy for me to sit here in my comfy room and write a couple of words that might influence a lot of people. What will really influence the world is when I step up and actually apply my words in real life.

If the sponsors have loads of money to give out, then they should give it to people who are needy and cannot afford food or cannot afford to live, not the ones who can manage to write some influential words and wait for grabbing the money when they want.

I see contests all around. In fact, I even subscribed to a couple of blog contests a few days back. This is what happened! I saw this contest where there was a prize money put for a 1000 dollars and a couple of other freebies. For a moment, I lost my mind and got so greedy over those incentives that I decided to write for it and win it. And as soon as I made up my mind to write, I started thinking of the topic. No matter how much I thought, there was this need and urge in my mind that it has to make an impact on people, on others, on the ones who'll judge my writing, on the ones who'll actually decide if I deserved the money. I started thinking about my real life stories. They were too precious but not 1000 dollars precious. That's right, they were priceless. They may not have made an impact on others but they made an impact on me. Truth is your life only makes an impact on yourself. A few others too maybe - the ones who care about you the most. So after thinking all this, I started thinking of making up stories. I thought about fiction. I thought about fairy tales. I thought about tragic endings or beginnings. I thought about animals, the nature, the birds, the people. I thought about relationships. But I failed to cook up something interesting for winning that ''money''. I got so mad at myself that I dropped the idea of writing for the money. It had this evil influence on my mind. It was making my feelings too commercialized. It was manipulating my heart and I could not let that happen to my thoughts!

I say that never sell your thought, your blog or your heart for the money. Your thoughts are too pure and precious for just some contest grab-on. The day you sell your thoughts for the money, it will be sold forever. The things written from your heart is SO not worth the price they are putting on them.

It's sad to see that 90% of the posts written for the contests are so fake and commercial that they have no impact except scream out loud for the money. Sure, writing for a living is a different thing. But then again, the people who write for a living have their posts manipulated, reviewed, refined like 50-60 times before they actually get it published. That's not the real outburst of thoughts. Our real thoughts are raw, fresh and drafted in our hearts for a long long time. Do you really want to sell them?

If we had put our passion, our heart in our jobs, it wouldn't be frustrating. Heck, it wouldn't even feel like we deserve the stipend they pay us. Think about it. When was the last time, you did a job you really loved? And if you did really love it, did you care about the money so much? I bet no. If yes then maybe that's the way it is. What I feel is already spoken.

The saying - "If you're good at something, never do it for free" has its own limits too. Remember that.