LaLa Land

Easy My @ss!!

2012-01-16T16:06:00.000-05:00

So, how bad is it to cook a chicken with giblets in it?

Because I can’t get them out.

Seriously. The f@#$*&s won’t come out.

I put it in the fridge for 22 hours, people. TWENTY-TWO.

AND I put it in cold water for two hours, using clean water every thirty minutes for two hours. (Do you have any idea how little I needed something else forcing me out of my office chair every thirty minutes?? Cuz kidlets doing that isn’t enough?)

Yeah, I used BOTH defrosting methods and those giblets were frozen to the inside of the bird.

So now, I’ve whipped off my rubber gloves in a bold move born of pure frustration: I am touching the bird with my bare hands. A raw chicken. On my hands. Are you hearing me? Cuz I’m about to ruin dinner by puking into the cavity of this bird. (Salmonella poisoning, here I come!!) I’m going to have to spray bleach *this whole area* to keep from getting sick. Not to mention my hands, which will never be clean again. And the little droplets of salmonella-laded water, which are currently flying in gentle glee everywhere, don’t even get me started on those!

Most frustrating?

It’s labeled an “EASY Roaster Chicken.”

I hate liars.

The bird is now double-ziplocked and back in the fridge.

We’ll save “easy” for tomorrow night but today?

Who’s feelin’ like a burger?

Review: The Oxymorons

2011-10-27T02:38:00.001-04:00

So my sisters (and Leigh, who's LIKE a sister) and I decided to have a girls' night. On a Wednesday. We're such rebels.

I put forth the idea that we should go to improv night with The Oxymorons at Magooby's in Timonium, MD because it would be fun (and because I'm awesome like that!). Now, in the interest of full-disclosure, I know one of the self-proclaimed "Morons"....but I don't have to tell you which one! ;) (you can guess in the comments!).

There were 3 other improv groups there but truth be told, I didn't know that going in and consequently....well, my mom brain didn't retain them. Sorry guys. (Hey, "mom brain" is one of the few perks of being a mom, I'm going to use it. To. Death.)

Now, the Oxymorons were different from the other groups in that they used a ton of audience participation and model themselves after Whose Line Is It Anway? (one of my absolute favorite shows ever, btw). My favorite games are the bell game and mannequins. And they did both right at the beginning of their set, so I was a happy girl. ;)

The bell game involves two people having a conversation about whatever the audience has suggested and that MC/director Andy has chosen from those suggestions. Every time Andy hit the bell, the actor speaking had to change the last thing he said. Of course, it's funnier when the bell is hit a good 3 or 4 times in a row (presumably stressing the actor out but funny as hell for the audience). For us, it was Randy and Toby as father and son respectively, talking about prom which devolved into a conversation about how mom was a nympho and why the mailman lived upstairs!

Mannequins is the game where two actors are once again having a discussion about an audience-picked topic (disco dancers for this one!) while two members of the audience tap the actors' body parts to make them move. Hilarious because of course, the actors are trying to keep up with their dialogue and are also trying to match said dialogue to whatever wacky positions their volunteers are putting them in! By the end of this skit, Andy and Toby were embracing and Andy was remarking on the fact that his hand was not on a disco ball! (the one I have inserted is not the one we saw last night....just in case you were wondering...cuz it's not.)

My sisters and I were laughing terribly hard, making it difficult to consume the chicken fingers and fries we ordered (which were good!) and after all that laughing and drinking of alcohol (oh, did I forget to mention that? It's really not necessary to consume alcohol in order to find the actors funny, I swear!!) we were sweating to death and removing our cardys, so layer up for Magooby's!! Where was I?

Oh right. Made us laugh. Fun audience participation (Andy took my soccer player suggestion for the Gibberish Murder Mystery game; I felt like a rock star!). As a matter of fact, while the other improv groups were also very very funny, with super smooth transitions between skits, they had virtually no audience participation. My sister Steph and I (both over the age of 30) found them all funny, but the Oxymorons the most fun. Kate and Leigh (both 22) thought Oxymorons the best!

We all liked the audience participation aspect of it.

All in all, an incredibly successful girls' night and I'm already checking the schedule to see when I can drag other friends to an Oxymoron show! Who's with me?!

The Oxymorons can also be found on Facebook here.

Magooby's Joke House is also on Facebook. (I mean, who isn't?)

The Rules of Lara: Memorize Them

2011-10-27T01:34:00.001-04:00

Disclaimer: These rules may be changed or become null and void at any time at the sole whim of Lara, with no advanced warning...well, except this one.

Lara's Rule #18: Never chastise me for being impatient. I will turn on your ass faster than you can blink!

Lara’s Rule #17: Use your common sense around me at all times. If you choose not to exercise your common sense muscles, I will use my physical muscles and head-bonk you.

Lara’s Rule #16: I don’t share my men. If you’re with me, you’re under my laser-sharp focus and no one else’s. Or I’ll turn my laser-sharp focus on her and you’ll get a free preview of what’s coming. Got it?

Lara’s Rule #15: No horror movies if I will be in the house alone in the succeeding 24-48 hours. It’s just cruel and I’ll make you suffer along with me cuz guess who I’ll be calling at 2am when I can’t sleep? Additionally, don’t watch them with me unless you are prepared to have bruising on your arm---I hold on tight. Or, if you’re “mine”, I’ll be in your lap. (see rule #11)

Lara’s Rule #14: I don’t ever bring people back from the dead. It’s not right, so don’t ask me.

Lara’s Rule #13: Do not talk while I am interrupting.

Lara’s Rule #12: If I am obviously having some kind of bad day and am starting to get upset (this will be indicated by much cursing and gesticulating) (that means, “waving my arms around” people.) do not ever say to me “Now Lara, calm down.” When has that ever worked when you said that to someone? When? Exactly.

Lara’s Rule #11: Do not come into my bubble. I have a very large personal space bubble. If I am related to you by blood….no wait, that’s not always true either…hmmm, ok, if I obviously love you, be you family or friend, I will be very affectionate. But if I don’t know you: No touchy touchy. You will find yourself flat on the floor, holding your crotch, bleeding from the nose, with a headache. Go ahead. I dare you.

Lara’s Rule #10: Do not ever, under any circumstances, make repetitive noises. Anywhere. Ever. I don’t care what it is. The penalty for this is an abrupt loud noise coming from my mouth that sounds like this: “Knock it the fuck off!!”

Lara’s Rule #9: Always compliment Lara. I can be insecure and uncertain. Rather than telling me to suck it up (which can result in a bitch slap) it is better to just stroke my ego. Then everyone’s happy. For example, “Lara, you are the Queen,” is an excellent one to start with. (Since 99% of men require this, I feel it is my duty as a feminist to require the same.... in the interest of equality you understand.)

Lara’s Rule #8: Never touch my chocolate. (That’s it. There’s no further instructions here.)

Lara’s Rule #7: I ride shotgun. If I’m not riding shotgun, it’s because I’m driving. If I’m not riding shotgun and I’m not driving, I’m barfing. That’s all there is to it. It’s like a mathematical equation: Lara + backseat= barf. Don’t do it.

Lara’s Rule #6: Don’t drink while I’m talking. It will inevitably come out of your nose because everything I say is funny. This is more a warning or a caution than a rule, but still….it needed to be said!

Lara’s Rule #5: I only drink sweet wine. Don’t bring that fancy, dry shit and try to sell it to me. I’m not drinking it; I’ll spit it back into the glass and then dump it down the drain. Don’t test it. I’ve done it before.

Lara’s Rule #4: I like things just-so. Some people call it anal. I prefer “detail-oriented in a way you obviously are not.” Don’t touch my stuff. You will get your hand smacked. Big Joe taught me that.

Lara’s Rule #3: Don’t buy me items containing satin. I have huge issues with texture. Satin reminds me of this hideous bathrobe I had as a kid. It was quilted. And my hang-nails caught on it. And it made creepy noises….

Lara’s Rule #2: I never answer call waiting calls on my cell phone. Sure, the phone tries to give you little icons to work it out, but they’re like men: they don’t do what they say they’re going to do and then I’m all aggravated and pissed off. I hate that!

Lara’s Rule #1: Memorize the Rules of Lara!

E is for.....

2011-10-25T01:09:00.000-04:00

.......Excellent.

As in: "Why thank you, I am having an excellent day, how about you?"
As in: "This chocolate is so excellent, I forget why I cannot eat this as my every meal..."

My day started off rotten---forget to set my alarm, got kids to school in record time, got home to realize neighbor still had my keys, I was locked out AND I had left my cell phone on the kitchen counter, so no help there.

But then, the owner of this new place where I'm trying to get employed called and we ironed out some issues. Then I literally hung up and the phone rang and the other chronic problem I was having has a potential solution: a sitter that can work any hours and is willing to work with me! THEN , one of my friends wants to know how much it would cost for me to re-vamp his blog and design it! Things were just hunky dory from there! It's all in your attitude folks! I decided, while sitting in the car, waiting for the ex to show up, "I'm not letting this one stupid moment define my whole day. I refuse. And if I refuse, you lose. That's all there is to it.

Where I Am From....

2011-10-25T01:01:00.000-04:00

I am from VCR’s, from Star Wars and ET.

I am from a little cottage; cozy, sunlit, with the smell of coffee in the morning.

I am from the strawberry plant, the climbing lilac, the hosta and the rose.

I am from Scrabble games and reading and stubbornness; from Joe and Judy; Thomas and Jewel; from McKusky.

I am from sarcasm and wit and laughter.

From real Santas and Easter bunnies.

I am from traditional Mass. From incense and Mary and tiny folded dollars for the poor box.

I'm from Baltimore and Bohemia, from icing’d desserts and pot roast and sauerkraut.

From motorcycles on days cold enough for frost bite, from ribbons twirling to Whitney Houston, milk crackers and ocean vacations.

I am from shoeboxes and photo albums, brittle curling sepia and single cherished copies.

** this lovely gem came from a template, found here. And *I* found it by way of my good friend over at Lessons from the Queendom. Thanks Nic!

D is for....

2011-10-20T15:32:00.000-04:00

Dog.

TRINITY

March 25, 2003-October 20, 2011

R.I.P. honey

I will miss you, especially during this next phase in my life, but I know you are with Shadow, happy, healthy and whole. Be a good girl. Mommy loves you.

C is for....

2011-10-17T22:46:00.001-04:00

...Crazytown.

And here's the Mayor:

I've seen this in several places today and I finally watched it.

Yeah.

You know, people like this give REAL protestors a really really bad name. Really.

All these college kids, who have no idea what they are actually protesting about/for, but there they are, on the streets, talking to people with cameras even!! If I were the organizer of this protest, I'd have trustworthy people walking around with clipboards, taking names and asking questions to test stupidity levels....and then tell the ones that fail that they are under no circumstances, on pain of death, to talk to anyone with a microphone or camera. And then I'd confiscate their cell phones. ;)

This guy is just reinforcing the idea that it's a bunch of dingbats out protesting with nothing real to say. Where is his mother?? And better yet, where is the mother of the young girl---she needs her glasses back by the way---who is actually sobbing about what this dingbat is saying!?

By not monitoring who's recording--and everyone has a cell phone and camera these days---well, they are a bunch of dingbats. With big signs and loud voices. That no one is listening to.

I say: actually. get. organized.

If you need a marketing person, I'm your girl! ;)

(This blog post has been brought to you by:
Siostra: a La Carte Marketing
www.facebook.com/siostra.marketing)

B is for....

2011-10-07T00:47:00.000-04:00

...Beautiful.

Ok, eventually, I'm going to put some SAT words in here, but really, here in southern PA, it was indisputably a bea-u-ti-ful day! Lots of sun, crisp and cool most of the morning before it became warm. I took a long drive down some scenic backroads for a job interview and all I saw were rolling hills, curving roads and ...corn fields. Less exciting, but beautiful nonetheless!

And of course, it's always a beautiful day when Handsome has texted me. :) I know. I sound totally silly and smitten, don't I? I make myself sick!

Isn't it beautiful though? :)

View from my office window today. Hot air balloons rock!!

A is for.....

2011-10-05T22:05:00.000-04:00

Asinine.

I don't know why. It's the first word that popped into my head.

I'm going to try to showcase a word every day, that encapsulates how I feel about that day, going through the alphabet in order. Today was actually NOT asinine, come to think of it, unless you use it like, "It was asinine how I couldn't stop smiling over a text." Ok, that would be appropriate.

See, there's this guy....

That's all I'm a gonna say. He's shy. (LOLOLOLOLOL) Ok, that's totally not true. It's me. Our relationship is complicated right now. And the complexity of our relationship is in direct proportion to how close I am to being officially divorced. And he's...prudent, I believe is the word my mother used. And you know what? That makes me smile too. It's him, being respectful. And I greatly appreciate that (did you see that? How I slipped in another good "A" word? Right? Right?)

Ok. Now THAT's all I'm gonna say. ;)

But me, hard-core smiling (um, yeah, there might've been school-girl-like giggling) over him texting me back was really....asinine. Yeah. That's appropriate.

Tomorrow's letter: B. Cuz I'm anal like that. (another "A" word!! Go me!)

Waking Up in Strange Places.....

2011-10-02T18:36:00.001-04:00

So Ian wakes me up in the dead of night. Kate has no clock in her room, so I have no clue what time it is. He's naked. (No, I'm not dreaming, but I'm irritated) and he says,
"Mom, I overflowed my pull-up. I need a new one!!" and he's all bent out of shape.
All I can think of is my mother's couch, which he was sleeping on, and hoping he is confused as he often is about just peeing in his pull-up and actually overflowing it and getting his pj's wet.
But he's being really loud and Kate and Morgan are trying to sleep and I'm completely annoyed I'm not sleeping (I may have mentioned that). So I jump out of bed, shushing him and, sans glasses (this will be important later) I rifle through one of our suitcases and hand him a pull-up.

The next morning, I come down and Ian is just in his pajama shirt and a pull-up.
A pink, size 2T/3T pull-up with princesses on it.
Because he's wearing Morgan's pull-up.

;)

I'm Coming Out

2011-09-16T12:48:00.002-04:00

I’ve made a big decision.

I’m outting myself.

The big secret?

This is me.

That’s it.

I know, shocking right?

I’ve been perusing online dating sites, trying to figure out how to find this soulmate I’m longing for and I’ll tell ya I’ve discovered some things about myself:

I curse. More than most people are comfortable with. I slip up in front of the kids now and again. I’m working on it.

I’m a food slob. Especially if I wear my special white shirts with the food magnets? Then you can trace all my meals on it.

Sometimes I’m cranky, even when it’s not my time of the month.

I read comics. And lots and lots of books. I would almost rather read than do anything else. (Ok, well most things, but not EVERYTHING else…oh, you get my meaning, dammit!)

I find I’m judgemental. I don’t like morbidly obese men. (more on that later)

I don’t like piercings on your face….or nipples….or anywhere that is not your ear. And even then, don’t wear bigger diamonds than me!

Your hat’s crooked and I like things symmetrical.

I don’t like guys that have pictures of them with their arms thrown around other guys and big cheesy grins. It’s suspicious.

I don’t like guys that have pics where they are with women, unless they state it’s their mom or aunt or sister or cousin or whatever. It’s suspicious.

If your trailor is in the background of your profile picture…..yeeeeeah. No.

If you send me a message and your profile heading is along the lines of: hey baby, I like what I see, how about you?

Yeah. Again: No.

I am not looking for a guy to protect me, to do FOR me, to take care of me. There will most certainly not be ANY type of asking permission or obedience. Go find a cult if that’s what you’re looking for. But this? This is the wrong tree buddy. In fact, you’re in the wrong damn forest for that shit.

I know how to do a lot of things for myself, but certainly not everything. If I need your help, I will ask. And if I find you competent, I’ll ask again. And again, and again (you can see the pattern here…).

This is me:

No Make-Up Me, First Thing in the Morning. Not even had my coffee yet!

This is me also:

Sorry. Thaaat's actually a picture of Emily Blunt.

But this isn't:

All or nothin’ baby.

So you know what I don’t want from you; here’s what I do like:

I want a partner in crime; a P.I.C. if you will. A best friend….with benefits. Someone to stand back to back with me while the baddies circle. I want my own gun and my own horse when we ride off into the sunset, dammit!

I like to snuggle. A lot. I want your attention, frequently.

I want to be able to depend on what you tell me you’re going to do.

I want to be able to trust you.

I keep myself up, so should you! I wash my face twice a day! My nails and toes almost always match in color! I cover my gray hair! I shave my legs regularly! I keep my weight as close to 120 lbs as possible, I eat healthy----NO I AM NOT ATTRACTED TO SOMEONE WHO COULD SMOTHER ME WHILE WE’RE NAPPING!! Ok. I’m sorry. I think it’s important to be honest. I know the fat guy with the cute little woman is all over tv, but that’s just not me. I need someone who has a similar active, healthy lifestyle.

Handymen: PLEASE APPLY!! I love it when things are NOT broken and can actually be used. (this includes my car)

No. Slobs.

Slobs = Stress.

I want you to laugh at the same things I laugh at....and at the things I say because frankly, I'm funny. And if you're not laughing at me, something's wrong. With you. And I don’t like a crude or low sense of humor. I like stuff that’s actually FUNNY. Witty. Sarcastic. Snarky. Take your pick, but nasty sex jokes or body humor is not me. American Pie? Makes me gag. Real funny? Friends. Will & Grace. Situational comedy. (look it up)

I am not this funny all the time. Be prepared for long boring moments with me. Dry spells happen.

But generally, I am super high energy, I do a lot in the day. I don’t like to be bored. I am not super adventurous but I’m getting better in my old age, more sure of myself. I’d like to try rock/wall climbing, motorcycle riding, hot air balloon ride, snowboarding, snowmobiling and other cool (but essentially safe) stuff! ;) I’d also like to get a tattoo or two, just can’t afford it right now. And no, I don’t want you to take me because what if it ends up like this: “Yeah, I went and got this tattoo, isn’t it cool? Yeah, I went with this guy that I was dating at the time.” That sucker is gonna be on my skin FOREVER. I don’t want to be forever reminded of you when I look at it, just in case. I’d rather have my sisters or one of my best friends there. I’m thinkin ahead here.

{*whispering* whole paragraph about s-e-x removed because I suddenly realized my 14 year old nephew could click on my facebook link and get here....geesh, totally cramping my style Steph, why you gotta let your kid on facebook??! Now I've gotta be all responsible and sh----crap. Geez}

*crickets chirping*

See? That really helps to narrow the playing field. All you guys looking for a desperate, easy to romance divorced lonely woman? Not this chick.

So, maybe I end up alone.

Have I ever told you about my back-up plan? It involves a lot of quiet, relaxing time, singing, and a black habit….

Please Hold While We Figure Out How to (Not) Assist You...

2011-09-12T22:40:00.001-04:00

Hello.

Please listen carefully as our menu options may have changed.

For really boring Muzak with frequent repetitious computer interruptions, press 1.

For all options in Spanish (even though you don’t live in California, Texas or Florida), press 2.

For a wait time of approximately 4 days, 32 minutes and 21 seconds, press 3.

For dead silence for an unnerving amount of time until you think you hear breathing, press 4.

For eighties music you can sing to until someone abruptly answers the phone during an embarrassing high note, press 5.

To speak to a computer that will constantly give you options you don’t want, press 6.

Otherwise, all operators are busy. Please call back at another time, preferably between 9 am and 3pm while you’re inconveniently at work and can’t call anyway.

Thank you. Have a fantastic day.

BEEP!

I'VE Won an Award! Go Me!

2011-09-02T14:28:00.001-04:00

What I need to do:

1.Thank the wonderful person who gave the award and link back to them in your post.
2.Share 7 things about yourself.
3.Pass this award along to up to 15 recently discovered blogs.

1. Well, first and foremost, there is Miss. Fenny, over at The Crazy Rambler, who has become a dear friend via a contest I held over on Frugal Blog Make-Overs, if you can believe it! I was giving away blog re-designs and she won one! ;) I wasn't as much help as I would've liked to have been, as she uses WordPress and I, obviously, use Blogger, but still. We struck up a conversation. And the coolest thing about our friendship? She is halfway around the world, speaks several languages (and is totally fluent in English, had no idea it was not her native tongue for the longest time!!), is totally interesting and is super nice and super supportive! I heart her. :) So thank you Fenny, for thinking of me and giving me the award for The Versatile Blogger. I really appreciate it!

2. SEVEN things about myself?? That is a lot. Hmmmm

      A. I have always wanted a tattoo. Of a phoenix. Not huge, but wrapped horizontally around my ribcage... Never more relevant in my life than now. And since working at Planet X Comics, I want a small Wonder Woman tattoo on the inside of my left wrist, so I can cover it if I want to ...however, I have been too chicken to do so before now. Not because of the needles. Not because of the pain (ok, a little because of the pain) but because of the permanency of it. Story of my life (as I'm going through a divorce!).

     B. I want to write and draw my own comic. All. By. Myself. (which is, stupidly, how I try to do everything. I strain something every time.)

     C. I dream of staying home with my kids and writing and drawing in a fabulously cozy, sun-filled space and making a lovely living for myself.

     D. I've always wanted to be a part of a movie. I'm bossy enough to direct.

     E. My family are all my BFF's. It's like I'm a fish out of water when I'm here in PA but as soon as I go home and my family (ok, and mad chaos) are around me, it's like I've slipped back into the water. I can breathe. I'm back with my tribe. People can make me laugh (and vice versa) almost without trying. Everything we do is connected to a memory.

     F. Patience might be a virtue, but it's not one I possess.

    G. I can draw pretty well.

Now, passing it on to up to 15 other bloggers?? That's a lot!! I have to run up and get my son's birthday supplies (cuz hey, I don't procrastinate or anything!) so I'll try for 5, ok?

1. Untypically Jia. Hilarious. Like, milk-is-coming-out-of-my-nose hilarious. Like desk slapping, Imma gonna pee my pants hilarious.

2. Blog.SpoonGraphics   Chock-full of handy info, inspirations and awesome tutorials. It is my new absolute fave place to get lost in!!

3. Copyblogger. Ok, totally not recently discovered, but how about recently RE-discovered? I read what comes in my inbox. Every.Day. They do not put out crap, ever. It's all worth reading!

4. Fresh Fiction. I read (free) books and review them for Fresh Fiction. They also have a blog component which I'm just getting acquainted with. (I know, don't end a sentence with a preposition but look, you, I have to leave soon!! Give me a freaken break, ok??) Don't ever complain about not knowing what to read next with this extensive blog at your fingertips!

5. Siostra: a la Carte Marketing. Ok, so this is blatant self promotion!! I tried graphic design once before but found my technical skills lacking. Now that I've got 1 year of art school under my belt and experience, I am psyched to try again, this time with my sister Kate, a professional writing major.

Thanks again Fenny for the award!!

Where Have I BEEN All Month??

2011-06-04T12:11:00.001-04:00

Well people, I got a part-time job. The upside? Some extra cash, a fantastic work atmosphere, the best bosses ever, an artist mentor and tons of new friends! The downside? Leaving my babies to go to work and not having as much blog time! I miss you my cyber friends!

So here's the dealio: I'm going to write when I can and schedule them out. I'm going to try to maintain the Movie Mondays and the What's Cookin' Wednesdays at the very least.

I have worked too hard to design and organize this site and at getting and maintaining relationships with my followers to quit now! Please be patient while I get myself sorted out and am learning a ton of new stuff at work; my brain is on overload!

So where am I working you ask? Why, the fabulous Planet X Comics! It's located at 2085 Springwood Road, York, PA. I'm excited to work in an atmosphere rich in stories and art. The owners, Tim and Kim Fling, are fabulous, flexible, and fun. They have brought me right in with open arms! We find ourselves facebooking long into the night, ripping on each other and cracking up. I have found my niche and life is good!

On the horizon: Strawberry Chocolate Oreo Cupcakes, Cinnamon Muffins, Movie review for "Hanna" and more!

LaLa's Cozy Corner Thursdays

2011-06-01T23:16:00.000-04:00

I am reading books like a CRAY-zy person! I have a few that I got myself, including some graphic novels I bought at the comic book store, and then a bunch from Fresh Fiction. Go to my Fresh Fiction reviewer profile here and you'll see a complete list with blurbs so you can see which ones you might want to read. Here is a link-less list of what I've covered so far:

The Soldier by Grace Burrowes

Daybreak Zero by John Barnes

All by Parker Blue: Fang Me, Bite Me, Try Me

Saving Zoe by Alyson Noel

Then I've got these reviews all written up but pending:

Department 19 by Will Hill (vampire book)

Dressmaker of Khair Khana by Gayle Tzemach Lemmon (women's contemporary literature)

The Provence Cure for the Broken-Hearted by Bridget Asher (women's literature)

Sphere by Michael Crichton (science fiction, thriller)

and

Mercy by Rebecca Lim (YA, paranormal, romance)

I have 14 other books to read! So plenty there!

I will also be reviewing here on LaLa: Timeless Conflict by local York, PA author, Ute Perkins and the graphic novel version of Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief.

WWJSD: What Would Jason Statham Do?

2011-05-27T16:20:00.000-04:00

I have hit a plateau.

My 34 year old body says: That hollow leg you used to fill with 2nd’s and 3rd’s at dinner? That super high metabolism? That bone-skinny body that never gained weight?

Yeeeeah. That’s gone. Not comin’ back. Get over it.

Move. On.

Man. So now I have to actually WORK to get skinny? I have to feel the burn? Watch what I’m eating? But that sounds so much like….work. Yuck.

But I desperately want abs, real, cut, washboard stomach abs. And since people do accomplish this, professional trainers or not, that means it IS humanly possible to attain.

Ok, so now what do I do??

Well first I stumble upon (no pun intended!) an article about the one and only Jason Statham. For those of you that may (be living under a rock) not know him, he is an action star. He used to be an olympic swimmer back in the day and now he’s more stuntman then actor. He’s well trained in mixed martial arts and kickboxing, according to his IMDb profile. He’s ripped, that’s what he is. And how does he get that way…and stay that way?

Mr. Statham’s got access to this cool gym for stuntmen. They climb walls, throw weights around, spar with every kind of weapon imaginable---it sounds like you can do just about anything you want and if it’s something a knight, superhero or hitman would do? All the better! He did an interview with Men’s Health magazine a few years ago where he describes his routines and work-out schedule: 6 days a week, no more then 35 minutes a day. I’ve been doing like 60 minutes, 3-4 times a week. This man’s abs are “shredded” as they say and mine? Well, not so much. What gives?? (I want my abs!!!)

I’ll tell you what: that man did not have 3 babies!! AND I’m not eating like a monk. (A little whiny:) and I LIKE food! I’m not sure I could survive if I was eating power shakes and protein bars in between meals of spinach salad (no, not the good kind, with dressing and hard-boiled eggs and bacon, trust me) and a grilled chicken breast. Plain. I mean, what’s life if you aren’t enjoying things like EATING for God’s sake?? Look, I’m not a pig, I eat cookies but make sure it’s the serving size, not flopped on the couch eating half the package at once. I don’t eat chips. There’s no candy in my house. I rarely imbibe either alcohol or caffeine (except some regular green tea once in a while or a 75% defac/25% regular cup of coffee). No soda here. High fructose syrup? Me no likey. Organics, as much as I can afford. Whole grain all the way (or at least whole wheat!). Salad a few times a week. Activia yogurt every day. Digestive enzymes with at least one meal a day to aid my poor tummy in digestion.

Alright, to be fair, the man does a different combo of exercises 5 days a week, then does a sustained trail run for an hour every Saturday! Obviously, he’s working his butt off. On the other hand, he hates it. Just read the Men’s Health article and you’ll see what I mean!

My weakness: ice cream and baked goods. Sigh. Had me some excellent chocolate cookies and cream ice cream. And it wasn’t any ½ cup serving either!! I eat lots of fiber but don’t consume enough water to help it along. I exercise pretty hard, but not a consistent 3 days a week, like I did for about a month.

I need to make some changes.

This is what I have been thinking about making those changes:

1. My mother always says, “Our bodies are made to work.” Whenever I think “I’m too tired to workout, I don’t feel like it….” I remember that this is what my body is made to do and OF COURSE I can do it!

2. Having a wimpy mental partner will not help you. Whip that whiner into shape and make that voice your biggest cheerleader instead: “You can do this! You’re almost done, don’t quit now!”

3. Make. It. Fun. I use Just Dance 2, the Just Sweat option. I do the second program (I think it’s labeled “tough.”) I do that as my warm-up, then go lift weights, do crunches, etc or I go right from there to the Tae Bo Advanced 8 minute work-out (which is a reeeeaaallly long 8 minutes by the way!). Lately, I’ve been working out in the mornings and at about 4pm when the boys are getting wild, we all go for a walk. Like, a 45 minute walk! I’ve lost 2 more pounds this week just from doubling up my exercise like that. Also, rockin’ work out music helps you to keep going mentally.

4. I’m making an effort to steer clear of sweets and empty noshing. That’s the hardest part for me. When I find myself in front of the pantry, scanning (both the pantry and my taste buds: hmmm, what am I in the mood for?) I think: What Would Jason Statham Do?? (from here on to be shortened to “WWJSD?”) He wouldn’t eat cookies that’s for sure. I knew I had to get some things in there that I wouldn’t feel guilty eating. I found some organic white cheddar with flaxseed crackers that are great: crispy, crunchy, flavorful. I eat them with slices of cheese on top or with my yogurt. (great for digestion also!) I eat oatmeal now for lunch or my evening snack. The High Fiber kind, which I add raisins to. It’s filling and low fat. I go fix myself a cup of hot tea. And if I’m doing it because I’m bored? I turn to one of my hobbies: reading, blogging, graphic design, working on my novel. Crap, even getting something done on my To Do list is better then eating some junk and then feeling guilty! I don’t do guilt. I eat cake at birthday parties (it’s one piece, not the whole cake, nor is it daily) and ice cream during the week but try not to do it two nights in a row.

5. I need more sleep!! It makes me feel less crazy, my memory is better, and it is supposed to help you lose weight; heavy people tend to sleep less and they think there’s a connection there, a cycle. Your body goes into panic mode or something and starts storing up that fat, ready to burn for energy because you’re not resting enough!! Get some sleep already!! (Sadly, a picture of a woman on a cozy pillow, fast asleep, is one of the images on my vision board.)

So the next time you’re facing the pantry, feelin’ a little hungry, needin’ a little pick-me-up, wanting your sugar fix think of this:

What would Jason Statham do?

TV Preview: Once Upon a Time

2011-05-17T14:29:00.001-04:00

Could this show BE more up my alley??

I love fairytales and finding (good) variations on them. Loved Enchanted because it was a conglomeration of a bunch of Disney favorites. Now we'll be able to see a similar idea in action via Lost and Tron: Legacy talents Adam Horowitz and Edward Kitsis on ABC Family this fall! Here's the blurb for the new show ONCE UPON A TIME:

"Welcome to a world where fairytales are real. Anna Swan is like any other 28 year old, until she discovers she's a lost princess destined to save her world from darkness. Experience the passion project of executive producers/creators Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz (Lost, Tron). Once Upon A Time is a thrilling twist of our most beloved stories."

Lots of familiar faces but best of all? Ginnifer Goodwin!! LOVE her! (by the way, she has totally cut all her hair off!) This looks like a movie on the small screen. Action-packed, romance, costumes, special effects, drama---you name it, they seem to have it! And at an 8pm time slot, maybe even something I can DVR for my 2 older kids who, by the time this airs, will be 7 and 5 but will be getting ready to go to sleep at 8pm on a school night. Additionally, I like the fact that this is different from anything else on TV right now. Check out the video and let me know what you think!

Many thanks to Technorati for giving me this preview opportunity!

Book Reviews: Too Many to List in the Title!

2011-05-10T14:59:00.001-04:00

Well, all it’s been a crazy week! I feel horrible for neglecting my readers but not only did a massive Mother’s Day digital scrapbooking frenzy (of my own making, OF course!) take over the last 10 days, my computer froze up on me then refused to acknowledge my power pack….again.

I am now typing on a brand-new Acer. The first brand-new computer I’ve owned in over a decade! My last two were re-furbished hand-me-downs from the hubby. It has twice the RAM as my other one; for techies, I am very excited about this! For non-techies: this computer, run very fast.

I completely missed Movie Monday yesterday somehow. Oh I know how, I was cleaning like a crazed maniac because my house was in such a state, from ignoring it for 10 days straight! It still needs mopping and some of us need to be brushed to within an inch of our lives (she has 4 feet and All.White.Hair.) but it feels much better in here! (I know you’re relieved too!)

Where’s the book portion of this post, you ask?

Right here:

I am writing for Fresh Fiction. As such, the reviews I write for them are copyrighted. If I reproduce items on my blog, it looks like one of us (either Fresh Fiction OR LaLa Land) are a “farming” site (non-original content that is gathered from other sites) and could bump us both down on the search returns for Google. SO, the books I receive from Fresh Fiction get Fresh Fiction only reviews. Those books I get direct from the author/publishing house will be reviewed in their entirety here on LaLa. If I have the energy, I might post a little somethin’ somethin’ on GoodReads and/or Amazon…you know, if I’m feelin’ nice.

So, the lovely ladies at Freshfiction.com have graciously given me permission to BLURB my reviews for you, with a link to their Fresh Fiction pages, so you might be seeing this on LaLa Land frequently . Please don’t gripe to me about having to click out. You don’t have to! :)

First up:

THE SOLDIER by Grace Burrowes is full of strong-willed characters; from the soldier himself, Devlin St. Just, to his love interest, Emmaline, to the young girl Winnie, personalities are clashing left and right. Things are going along just fine for Emmaline Farnum, or Emmie as she is called…. READ MORE>>

Alyson Noel is not new to the teen scene when it comes to books. Her latest teen protagonist is Echo, who is trying to make sense of life after the murder of her sister Zoe. Echo is now dealing with overprotective parents who ignore her when she's home and hover when she tries to leave, as well as entering high school. She is struggling with being in Zoe's shadow in more ways than one while her two best friends approach high school with enthusiasm and an old friend latches onto Echo in an uncomfortable way. READ MORE >>>

I have FIVE other reviews in pending:

The trilogy of the Demon Underground by Parker Blue, which includes Fang Me, Bite Me and Try Me.

Next is Mercy by Rebecca Lim:

And then Daybreak Zero by John Barnes:

Sorry this looks so crappy, but if someone can figure out how to FORCE Amazon Associates to put something in that is in any other configuration besides on the left, the would be friggen fantastic!! Geesh....

Movie Mondays: DVD Review: Tangled

2011-05-02T07:00:00.003-04:00

I'm just going to say this: I heart Mandy Moore. Seriously, she's too cute, she's maintained a good reputation and she's great in this movie. As is the actor, Zachary Levi ("Alright, you give me no choice. I'm going to have to pull out....'the smolder.'" so funny!)
My favorite part is where Rapunzel finally gets out of the tower and she is a yo-yo of emotion. First she's all happy to be free ("This is greeeeeaaattt!!") then she's fearful her mother will come after her (something to the effect of "What was I thinking?? She's going to kill me!") then she's like "Beeeessttt ddaaaaaaaayy eeeevvveeerrrrr!!!" lol She's having a great time, then she's sobbing, then she's thrilled, then she's wringing her hands. I thought it was a great reaction.
The little chameleon is adorable. They've got the fight scenes, the romance and the humor. They've got that great Disney misunderstanding/twist towards the end as well. I liked this a lot better than The Princess and the Frog.

Movie Mondays: DVD Review: Toy Story 3

2011-05-02T07:00:00.001-04:00

If you haven't seen this movie, why the heck not?? If you have watched these movies, they get progressively better and better. This one was just as funny and fast paced as the others, with the intensity really ratcheted up in my opinion. Towards the end, there are moments where you are gasping, where you are squinching your eyes shut, biting your lip---you're just not sure what is going to happen to these toys you've become so emotionally attached to! And there is an extra large heaping of what the Toy Story franchise does best: nostalgia. I'm not sure the kids get the whole wistfulness, memory, sadness combo, but boy, I was all teary-eyed by the end! Best scene: Ken trying on clothes for Barbie in the Dream House. Michael Keaton as Ken was hil-arious!
You will definitely enjoy this as much as your children...and be prepared for request to make a "tortilla Potato Head." Watch the movie. You'll see! ;)

My Deck Needs a Make-Over!!

2011-04-15T09:00:00.002-04:00

This post brought to you by Pier 1. All opinions are 100% mine.
My parents, God bless them, gave us an outdoor set when we first moved in six years ago. Unfortunately, we haven’t kept it in the best shape, leaving it on the deck all year ‘round. Consequently, the bolts have rusted through and now the backs of the chair are swinging in the breeze!
Now I’m looking around at outdoor furniture (with COVERS this time!) and I love many of the lovely outdoor items I’m seeing while prowling around the Pier 1website. You know, I am such a plain Jane all the time (food, clothes, etc) I am really trying to make an effort this to branch out and use more patterns. It makes it easier to decorate in the long run, with more colors to choose from in a multi-color pattern, like Pier 1’s Angelique pattern. Soooo cute!! I am really drawn to more old-fashioned patterns. I can’t say “retro”---it makes me think of the 70’s! I’m thinking more: what was in Grandma’s kitchen? No, not the olive green. Or maybe the olive green but with a lot of other colors thrown in! And so much easier to grab a bunch of cushions to get the latest patterns and colors rather then trying to revamp your whole outdoor setting, you know, like we’re going to be trying to do!

But what really surprised me when I went on Pier 1? Their big papasan chair!! I immediately remembered those from vacation at the beach when I was little. I was kind of surprised they had them because even then we didn’t think they were that fashionable but you know what I else I remembered? Sinking into that chair and curling up with a book. And fighting with my sibs over who was going to sit in it every evening for TV time!! And then I thought about that papasan on our nice long deck in the morning sunshine or breezy afternoon shade, with a book, curled up while my kids play and thought, “That would be soooo nice!” And if I could figure out a way to hang a swingasanfor my kids? Perfect!!! Hey, maybe we could hang that under the deck….hmmmm. A thought for the patio we’d like to create on the underside of the deck in the near future!

Right now, we have that uncomfortable set of table and chairs (I should have just called this post, “Sorry I didn’t like the table and chairs you got for us, Mom and Dad”! Oy.) and the idea of furniture out there that is beautiful, has style and comfy cushions….ahhh. I cannot express to you how fantastic it would be to have furniture out on the deck that we would actually USE! You know what I love, when I watch HGTV? When they go to those foreign countries and they have double sets of sliding glass doors that open all the way, so they merge indoor and outdoor? Rugs on the deck, side tables, cushions---it looks just like my living room, only out in the sunshine!! Expanding my living space, that’s what I like to hear! I have a large family and if I could utilize that deck when we have people over in the summer, that would be great! They have these large, brightly colored metal beverage tubs($69.95) that I just LOVE and would be so convenient to put out there with some drinks. I really need to stop looking, my wish list is getting longer and longer!
And frankly, something that is easier to take care of as well. I really like the idea that a lot their furniture is indoor/outdoor, so I could always bring it in for extra seating in the winter, without having to figure out how to get it from our second-story deck down to the front of the house and into the garage! Things you don’t have to put into storage but can just rearrange every season? Sold! NOR would I have to purchase covers and then [have to badger my husband to] go out and put them all on at the end of the season [only to end up doing it myself!]. I’m all about easy!
Did I mention that bright morning sunshine? They have these awesome fade-resistant umbrellas. I love the one pagoda umbrella! (see?? I’m not a plain Jane after all---there is a funky, artsy, ethnic-pattern-lovin’ decorator trying to get out!!) Fade resistant and all! Plus, it’s not attached to the table or even the separate base. We have our deck on the second floor up on the back side of the house (built into those PA hills!) and so I need something I can pull down quickly and get inside when it’s super windy and stormy. This looks to be about perfect!! Actually, I’d go so far as to say, if I got nothing else, I’d get an umbrella this season, so we can use our deck more without forking out $2,000 for an awning. But that’s just me!
Also, you might, if you love Pier1, want to check out these cool Pier 1 Tweetups they do! Don’t know what a TweetUp is? Click here to check it out!

What are your plans for your outdoor spaces this summer? Have an event you’re sprucing up for? Share! I demand it!

Movie Mondays: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

2011-04-11T23:55:00.001-04:00

This movie is based on a comic book series, which…neither Jay nor I had ever heard of, let alone read! However, I liked the guy who plays the lead, Michael Cera. The hubby and I were talking about that circle of young men who are all geeky, around the same age, who are so popular in Hollywood right now; Michael Cera is one those of course! Cute in a totally nerdy way. What’s so funny is that he had all these fight scenes and he was pretty good!

The premise of the movie is that Scott Pilgrim becomes infatuated with one Ramona Flowers while dating a high schooler who is actually 5 years younger than he is, whose name is Knives. Yes, Knives. She is so sweet and innocent and just loves Scott’s band, he feels like he can’t break her heart, so he continues to date her as he woos Ramona. However, he soon finds he has to fight all 7 of her exes in order to win the right to court her.

Mae Whitman

I was delighted to find Ms. Mae Whitman (currently the voice of “Tinkerbell” as well as playing dark-haired “Amber” on Parenthood on NBC) playing an ex of the character Ramona Flowers. She actually had a fight scene!! It was pretty awesome. That was my favorite scene.

Anna Kendrick

Then they had Anna Kendrick, of Twilight and later, Up in the Air Oscar nominated supporting actress, as Scott’s sister. She is ruthlessly common sense in this. Love her.

Chris Evans

And then, the actor who plays The Human Torch in Fantastic Four, Chris Evans, is an ex who is now a Hollywood hottie. That scene is also pretty funny! He gets all his look-alike stunt doubles to fight for him!

Finally, Jason Schwartzman gets in on the act as the ultimate baddie who wants to take Ramona back. He also gets a fight scene. That’s also pretty funny and unexpected.

Jason Schwartzman

I have to say, I wasn’t sure what to expect when we got this movie, but hubby and I were laughing out loud in a few places. Now, this is like a comic book come to life. They have the old-school TV-Batman call-outs of “BAM!” and “POW!” during the fight scenes, which can be a little distracting, but really, the fight scenes are well-choreographed, the fighters unexpected, the humor dry, and the storyline a unique perspective on the ole’ “boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy fights for girl” scenario.

I’d give it an “A.”

A plain old respectable “A.” If you like quirky movies and comics, you’ll like this.

What's Cookin' Wednesday: My Anal-Retentive Kitchen

2011-04-06T07:00:00.003-04:00

This is not the first time I have spoken of my anal retentive tendencies. I’ve talked about how not to pack my groceries and what not to do to my dishwasher. Now I’m going to talk about how my kitchen is organized.

1. Don’t mess with my pantry when you unload groceries.

We didn’t have room, really, for food once we had moved in and unpacked my kitchen 6 years ago. So we went to Ikea and bought a wardrobe and filled it with fixed shelves and slide-able baskets which would be our pantry. I filled it logically (duh) with heaviest items on the bottom. I need a stool, being 5 foot nothing, so that’s on the bottom with a bag full of paper bags we re-use, plus extra bottles of juice and our recycling bin. Then I have a shelf of cans (extra items that replace already opened ones in the fridge and other places) on the left to soups, veggies then fruit on the right. Then beverages (coffee mostly), bread and baking supplies. Then a shelf of carbs: pasta, rice, potatoes in a basket and a basket for items that won’t stand on the metal basket drawer: raisins, small container of sunflower seeds and anything in a zipper-top bag or packet. I put snacks all together in another place. And then cereal super high up. I actually had to do that (PLUS put a baby lock on the handles!) because Ian, when he was about 3, started being all Mr. Independent and getting into EVERYTHING “like a big boy”! That included helping himself to cheez-its and cereal. So I put them up insanely high where it is almost uncomfortable to reach to keep the kids out of everything.

But DON’T put the granola bars (less sugary and more fiber then cereal bars) on the snack shelf. They go with the cereal. And for the love of God, snacks do not go on the bread shelf! I know cheez-its can be classified as carbs, but they just don’t GO with rice and pasta! Oh, and turn all the boxes so the nutrition info is facing the wall; I like to see the label of what’s in the box facing out and typically, they label the panel opposite the nutrition label. Check, you’ll see.

2. First rule of the cabinets containing dishes: like goes together.

This means first, all bowls go together, then all bowls of the same size and then pattern go together. I mean, look with your EYES people, it’s all quite logical! It makes finding the right sized bowl for the job that much easier. Kids’ plates? All different funky shapes and sizes, so group like ones together and largest plates on the bottom. Obviously. Kids’ bowls, on the other hand, go down the bottom, under the island, again, like items stacked together. Don’t go all hodge-podge-y on me people! I don’t do leaning towers of bowls that topple over when I open the cabinet thanks. Why are bowls not with the kids’ plates you ask? Because first of all, there wasn’t enough room in the big cabinet.

Secondly, I needed something that I didn’t mind the kids getting into in the island because it was right on their level. This was because: hubby not putting locks on those cabinets + being on their level = contents constantly on the floor. So I put their little plastics bowls in there and then I encourage some independence by asking the little ones to get their own bowls for snacks and cereal. Awkward corner cabinets? Up top are cups and mugs (but NOT on the same shelf! Eesh!) and down the bottom, all my hardly-used oversized pans, vases, coffee carafes (is that “care-effs” or “kuh-raffs”?) and pitchers. I remember once, there was a woman in my mom’s group (mother of 4 whose kitchen was such a mess, you had to duck and cover when you opened a cabinet!) who came to my house for coffee and as I was finishing up unloading the dishwasher, she abruptly said: “I can’t believe how neat your kitchen is!! Can I see how you organize your cabinets?? “ She started whipping open doors and exclaiming over them. When she got to those corner cabinets she said,

“CUPS! What a great idea! I hate this cabinet. So awkward, I didn’t know what to put in there.”

I gotta give props to my mom, that’s what’s in HER corner cabinet but I asked the other mom,

“well, what’s in yours?”

She said, sounding puzzled,

“Casserole dishes.”

3. Drawers.

I put those items I use the most into drawers. I have 4 wider drawers and 3 smallish drawers. I did a LOT of rearranging the first 2 years we were here, trying to find the right place for everything. But one thing that never changed: I have a tea drawer. Right next to my stove (and it was a toss up: tea or spices in the only drawer beside the stove) where I boil my tea. I have an (ex) sister in law who had a tea drawer when we were in our twenties and I thought it was the coolest thing since sliced bread. I couldn’t wait until I actually had a drawer to put tea in (we were in a townhouse with literally one drawer in our kitchen that had my pot-holders in it!) When I got to this house, I created a tea drawer (I drink a lot of tea!!). *sigh* I love my tea drawer. It makes me happy every time I open it. Regular tea on one side, decaf on the other (Most of it’s decaf. I know, you wouldn’t know by…anything about me that I was decaf, but I am! Have been for years!) You know what’s really cool about tea? It all comes in boxes. Nice neat, square little boxes that fit so nicely together in my nifty, handy-dandy very square drawer. One of my other fave drawers? Spices!! I wanted a leveled spice drawer organizer shelfie thing but I couldn't find it to purchase after I'd seen it a few years ago online! Figures!

4. Lastly, there is my fridge.

*sigh again* My fridge is a lost cause, but every once in a while (ok, about once a month. You feel me, right?) I grit my teeth, take Clorox wipes to the whole thing and then rearrange it. But my family (read: my husband) will not keep up with my system. For some reason, he understands and follows the system in the pantry, does reasonably well with how our cabinets are organized but just pays no attention to where anything goes in our fridge! The door is the worst. I try to put all the cups of fruit together, dairy items together, dressings and marinades together. But inevitably, the salsa is in with the jellies and jams. He tries to cram my grapefruit cups in with the butter. And I can never find the damned parmesan cheese; it migrates all over the door. Most days I just shimmy things around as best I can, shake my head and shut the door. Other days, when I’m in a hurry, I am greatly annoyed I can’t find what I need. Greatly. Annoyed.

When you cook regularly, it is important to be able to be able to find things and move freely and quickly about your kitchen. When someone messes with the system, it’s like going 60 over a speed-bump, missing a step in a dance. It can be the difference between snatching that boiling-over pot off the stove with potholders, and a burned hand. Or getting that spill juuuuust before it rolls off the edge of the counter and having to re-clean a just-mopped floor.

Don’t mess with my kitchen system. It works. Work the system.

Movie Mondays: DVD Review of Beezus and Ramona

2011-04-04T07:00:00.003-04:00

Beezus and Ramona is about a modern family with traditional values. They go through some tough times (dad loses his job, mom goes back to work, dad flubs being a stay at home parent, house needs work, etc) but they work in a determined fashion through each and every problem.

Now, it’s been a long time since I read this book, but I really like Selena Gomez (I think it’s because she looks like an older version of my 5 year old niece!) and John Corbett is in it and Ginnifer Goodwin. Not to mention Bridget Moynahan, Josh Duhamel and Sandra Oh as the ever-patient teacher.

I loved the mood of this whole movie. It really seemed to match what I remembered of the book (other than that, I don’t really remember what happens in the book!). But what I loved about this movie? No foul language. No racy scenes. Good old-fashioned family movie watchin’ fun! I thought it was adorable and if you’re looking for something to watch on family movie night, this is it! (Especially if you have little girls! But this is a softer version of Dennis the Menace with Ramona’s antics, so I don’t think the boys will mind it…much. My boys, 6 and 4, both watched it!)

I give it an A+.

What's Cookin' Wednesday: Healthier Trail Mix

2011-03-30T07:00:00.003-04:00

You know, I never understood how people could get away with saying trail mix was healthy! Nuts in moderation, great, all those mono- and polyunsaturated fats, raisins are good----but m&m’s? C’mon people! Nice try! (ok, maybe dark chocolate of some kind!)

So today, I came up with this (ok, this is nothing new for you, but it's new for us!):

A healthy trail mix bar. I set out organic craisins and pumpkin seeds. That was all the organic I HAD so I also put out chocolate Cheerios, raisins, and sunflower seeds. In the organics section at Giant, I wanted to check out their craisins, as Ocean Spray’s had been kinda slammed in Eat This Not That for adding too much sugar. So I check out Nature’s Promise, a plastic tub of craisins: $4.99!! And a crap-ton of sugar!! WTF Nature’s Promise?? So I go to the bulk in the same aisle and find bulk craisins with several grams less of sugar. Win! And, if you can believe it, they were OUT of pumpkin seeds. So I grabbed a packet of pumpkin seeds which just happened to be organic.

And that, my friends, is how I accidentally ended up with two organic products in my pantry. As you might have read before, I’m not too keen on buying uber-expensive organics all the time. I do what I can and that grocery trip, that was probably it for organics!

Other things you can add include popcorn (preferably something that isn’t coated with butter….but not so little butter it scorches in the microwave. Here is a an OLD family trick: place a paper plate upside down in your microwave and place the popcorn bag on top. Keeps the bag from direct contact with the super hot glass plate, which contributes to scorching. Thanks Dad for using your big brain for something so small as keeping your popcorn from scorching! We heart you!) or chocolate Mini Wheats or whole wheat or whole grain pretzels (Snyder’s I believe it is makes several types of organic pretzels now…they’re probably expensive, just an FYI!). Just about any kind of nut besides a peanut has some sort of nutritional value. Walnuts have those omega-3’s you’ve been searching high and low for cuz you don’t like fish (or large, nasty, oily supplements that actually smell fishy! Ugh!). Almonds are good for you and so are pistachios. Eat what ya like!

Image Credit: Rex Roof

Remember peeps, I am not a medical expert. I read a lot. That’s not really a qualification, just an explanation as to where I get all this stuff! Call your doctor or ask a nurse or someone who plays one on TV. But don’t rely on me for your nutritional or medical advice. Thanks!