From here to there

He's here and he has brought Cuties

2013-02-20T02:50:00.000-08:00

I want coffee at this time and hour

but I dare not tell him, as I'm sure he'd appease me and serve me a cup made just the way I like it.

Then who would rise to find my mother visiting the beach in the morning?

Not I, or maybe not we. Unless our bed was transported to the shore.

One can hope.

For now he brings me Cuties. It's peculiar how his thick, painted and stained hands, wrapped in muscle larger than the average man's, delicately removes and separates the tiny pieces to make them bite size for my tiny, almost child-like mouth. He's aware of my tedious chewing.

Unaware of his own carefulness and perfection of such a task, these moments are who make him who he is, and his portrait is once again painted in my heart.

New Years Resolution

2012-02-05T11:19:00.000-08:00

One of several resolutions is to have fresh flowers all the time. I entered the year with a fresh bouquet that I didn't have a picture of, but here are the 3 others since the first!

Poured over pages

2011-03-15T19:15:00.000-07:00

I received my Spoonfuls, and I've ravaged the pages!

I've made it a point to seek out material that inspires me and lifts my Spirit. In turn I've noticed an ease with being myself, and I engage in conversation much easier when I'm listening to others' greatness.

On that note, yesterday, I met a man in the park who flew out of Japan 30 minutes prior to the earthquake. I will have a post about that story soon.

In the meantime, check out my original post about Spoonful and have yourself a taste!

http://spoonfulzine.com/

Xox,

Sarah

Happiness sent from Australia to me

2011-03-04T14:31:00.000-08:00

Happiest of Friday's my dear friends!

I recently purchased a subscription to an incredible publication titled "Spoonful"
and I wrote a quick email saying "hello". The editor wrote me back with a
beautiful response and I wanted to share the correspondence with you for
multiple reasons.

   1. She's adorable and writes beautifully! (I love writers who have a grace
   and flow with their words)
   2. Check out the publication and buy it for yourself
   and your girl friends! www.spoonfulzine.com
   3. I love being surprised with responses when I step out to just say hello!
   and acknowledge others for who they are in my life (small or big.) It's fun
   connecting with other people I've never met. If I hadn't emailed her, we may
   have never made contact! I love connecting with new people, if only briefly.

Enjoy, my hearts-of-sweetness!

Xox,

Sarah
...........................................................................................................................

Subject: Hello, hello!

From: Sarah Westergren

To: Spoonful

On 2 March 2011 16:28, Sarah Westergren wrote:

Spoonful!

Greetings one and all! I'm so glad I found your blog today. Sometime
late last year my close friend sent me a postcard that included pieces
of your "issue 1". Her craftiness combined with the few words I was
able to read from your publication created a magical moment while I
stood next to my mail drop one wintery afternoon in San Diego,
California.

I finally took the time to find your site today. I absolutely love it!

Thank you so much for contributing to the your friends, family,
community, and the world!

Xox,

Sarah Westergren
............................................................................................................................

Re: Hello, hello!
From: Spoonful
To: Sarah Westergren

Ah, wonderful Sarah!!

I just wanted to say thank you so very much for your fabulous email, you have
completely made my day! It's super lovely to know that people like yourself are
out there and have found Spoonful across the oceans!!

It is with huge pride that I shall be sending you your first ever subscription(!)
issues of Spoonful.I am completely chuffed that you have subscribed to our
humble little happiness project, and am delighted to be able to begin this Spoondiful
journey with you.

I shall be sending your first issues in the post first thing. They tell me it should take
up to 7 working days to reach you, I hope this is not too long.

Looking forward to hearing what you think of the various issues coming your way,
& please let me know if you have any comments or questions, I would love to be
of help.

Thanks again, & have a beautiful day...

Anthea.
Editor & Seeker of Hope.
www.spoonfulzine.com

...........................................................................................................................

Transformation

2011-03-03T19:59:00.000-08:00

Welcome! If you've been here before you will notice some changes. If you're new here, thanks for stopping by. I've changed the blog layout and colors. My brother Matt is a graphic designer, and after spending time discussing colors and design for a business card I realized I could draw from photo's I've been accumulating over time. Here is a snap shot of what inspired me to change the blog layout.

I'm grateful for your eyes that read these words and caress my imagination portrayed through these pixels.

Xox,

Sarah

A commercial friends and I contributed too.... Clifbar Lightwaves

2011-03-02T13:54:00.000-08:00

I'm ticklin' the ivories in this clip.... enjoy.

Video editing and graphics: Troy Page
Didgeridoo: Troy Page
Djembe: Matt Westergren
Guitar: Nathan Westergren
Keyboard: Sarah Westergren

Xox,

Sarah

Hugged by a forrest

2011-02-25T10:50:00.000-08:00

The sun falls filtered through your hands that hang low to the ground

Evergreen, you’re never mean

to my eyes.

You soften the outer corners of my face and lift me to heights your summit knows.

Sample the realism of my breath that’s released when I expel the words, “You move me.”

You’re enchanted, and more than once have I believed I was made to dwell fully in your soul.

The First Man to Woo Me with His Words

2011-02-19T22:56:00.000-08:00

During my high school career I day-dreamed a lot, and remember very little other than the moments of regret. Once I tried to impress a guy by belting out that I got the latest “Deanna Carter” CD for Christmas. I’d hoped my attempt would have him realize that I too liked country music and therefore we would have a powerful connection, somehow. Unfortunately, it was ill timed and his 3 friends turned to stare at me with bewilderment. He was 3 years my senior, and not only did I blow my chances with him, but I set myself up for recurrent embarrassment every time I made eye contact with anyone from the class of ‘97. He was my “boyfriend” for 2 weeks during the prior summer, so my time had already come and gone anyway.

Regardless of my social status, it was clear during those years that I became a hopeless romantic. A pivotal moment in my younger life was during my Creative Writing class. My teacher, her face I don’t remember, had limbs like a Tim Burton character and smelled of vodka, moth balls, and cats. She was, however, encouraging of my writing abilities which had a great impact on me in comparison to my English teacher who once told me my poem of a ship-at-sea was worthless. I really couldn’t see how even the football players in the class wrote something better than me, but he also didn’t have the image of them crushing beer cans on their foreheads from the weekend prior. I decided at that point that I wasn’t going to try to do well in that class. I think I skipped it for most of that semester.

During my favorite Creative Writing class I came across a poet during a specific assignment. At that time I didn’t know it would alter the way I viewed writing. The authors name was Rod McKuen, and the first book I picked up was titled Stanyan Streets and Other Sorrows. His words spoke directly to my romanticism married with my teenage hopelessness. Oh the hardships of a teenager!

I feel safe, powerful, and untouchable in the world of language and the assembling of vocabulary. Credit is due to the poetaster who conveyed writing is whatever you want to make it. I was unleashed!

Every once in a while I’ll happen upon a poem of Rod McKuen, and sometimes I’ll read my own and find a direct influence from the man who’d woo me from the pages of his works. While perusing through a few of my writings from this last year I came across several that I will share with you, but first a taste from the poems of a man I'd learned of in high school:

Comfort

If we could do it

all again

motorbike

through Roman cities

in the rain

watch the cats chase lizards

in the forum

and drink bad wine

from mouth to mouth

I probably would try

to love you harder than I did

I probably would smile a smile

much better than the ones

you knew

for I was just rehearsing then

imagining what easily might happen

in years to come.

It is not just you I love

(or even Roman rain)

or all the time you rattled

on my window

after twelve o'clock.

I love the smell of rooms-

where you have been

the foreign touch

of things I never knew

until you came along.

I even love your enemies

because they drive you

to my arms

for comfort.

Some of my recent:

The Awaited Journey

Where will I follow you too?

Into tomorrow and all through the day

up the mountain and during the belay.

I've got a world picked out for you.

Let's head down roads leading to nights

filled with fires

and daylight naps

in fields filled with wild grass

and noisy bugs

where ponds lay still and streams trickle over hillsides.

I'm ok with dirty finger nails and unwashed jeans

as long as we're sorrounded by mountains

and filled with the air they supply.

I'm a mountain girl, mountain boy.

And I'm ready to trek the world 100 times over.

B Street

I’ve vanished from my body

I’m lost in your eyes

and imagine where they’ve ventured too in your lifetime.

Your mouth distracts me from the words you’re saying

I can’t hear you.

What woman hasn’t been mesmerized by you?

I can’t form a thought that doesn’t have to do with touching you

Withholding myself seems pointless

the resistance slowly weakens me.

Your skin glows as warm as Bora Bora beaches

and I’m certain your cheek bones would cradle perfectly in the cup of my hands.

The canvas that presents

your lips, nose, and eyes

beckons me to explore it

with all of my being.

The temperature around my heart has slowly risen

and I’m certain you can tell something is up

by the way I have to intently focus on your eyes

still I can’t hear a word you're saying.

I want to be close to you

with no intention

but to feel you’re very existence next to me.

What have you been saying?

What have I been saying?

Have I said anything?

Do you know what you’ve been saying?

Are we both experiencing this together?

Wow, your smile.
You’d turn my world upside down

if you’d intended one only for me.

There’s no place I wouldn’t want to go with you.

This experience has my thoughts running in different directions

I'm as light and unpredictable as the air surrounding

after this heavy rain.

I can feel what it would be like

for my lips to graze near yours

and I’m in a whirlwind.

My mouth has gone dry

I lick my lips

I lick them again.

I bite them as they’re swelling.

Who are you that you do this to me?

What spell is this?

I never want to walk away from you

and though I know we won't kiss goodbye

I’d love to look at you

for

few

more

moments.

I now understand the endearment "honey."

You are honey to my eyes and lips.

I’m salivating at the possibility of tasting you one day.

For now, that's all. Enjoy the words and go love on someone who gives you the permission to graze their lips with yours.

Xox,

Sarah

I'm considering a life and health transformation through a 45 day Bikram Yoga Challenge. Don't tell anyone.

2011-01-27T21:17:00.000-08:00

I went out for drinks and appetizers with my friend Jon. His girlfriend recently received her Yoga teaching certificate, and from the beginning of their relationship (over a year now) he's been practicing Bikram Yoga.

"I'm doing a 60 day challenge for the 2nd time. I start February 1st and go until my birthday. You should do it with me," he suggested.

I stared off into a far corner and took a big drink of my wine. Could I commit to a physical activity for 60 days? I've been wanting to try my body at different sports with the intention of finding something I love and keeps me in shape. Could Bikram turn me into a 10? I'd even take being an 8. It would clear my skin, and I could wear less make up. I know guys like a natural woman. Maybe I'd be turning away date invitations after only 3 weeks of Bikram. All those thoughts trucked through my head. I lit up inside about being a size 4 and as hot and nimble as Tinker-bell. If I loved Bikram perhaps I could keep at it until summer. I live next to the beach and don't have a beach body. I've been complaining long enough about my size. I dislike pictures of myself.

"Let me think about it," I said with a smirk knowing full well that I was really considering it. If I'm going to do this, I need to beef up the stakes, and put it all on the line. I want to get as much out of this for my life and not just my body. There is a list of dreams I've had going for a year, perhaps this discipline and focus would gear me towards getting what I want. From experience I know being in action gets results.

Maybe this could be the thing to get that hot vegetarian, yoga, surfer guy's attention. Or maybe I would choose to date him. Am I that shallow? Maybe I should just do this for myself. Crap, am I really that consumed with what I look like? Yes.

Though hesitant to reveal what I want, I think it's time I put my ass on the line. Here is the list of things that I'm seeking for my life:

Love

Friendships with creative and entrepreneurial-minded people

Freedom and full self expression

Financial abundance

A radical relationship with Creation and creativity itself

A career I love (that doesn't feel like a career)

Make my own schedule

Be physically active every day

Have lunch and drinks with the above people and my close friends

Regular travel and road trips

New car

Cabin at Priest Lake

Clear complexion

Eat 75% raw

Surf regularly

Record music regularly (and perform somewhere)

Six pack (why not, I've never had one)

There are a few other things that I'll later mention, as of now that's the main list.

Tonight I granted myself me time and a long shower with the allowance of letting my dreams run wild. I love indulging in the "what if" process!

I haven't committed to this 45 day challenge. Forty-five is all I can do; I'm leaving town during the later portion of March. However, February 1st is approaching quickly. I tried Bikram a year ago, and enjoyed it. I'm going to go this week, and then one last free session before I purchase a month unlimited package.

I'm ready to transform, but am I ready to face the challenges that come with it? What is there to give up? Nothing and everything.

Spot the twice used Yoga mat!
Is it time for its 45 day challenge debut?
I'll be the judge of that.

Xox,

Sarah

A Tribe, Their Music, Their Stories, and Life as I know it with My Friends

2011-01-25T18:22:00.000-08:00

This is an article I wrote about my friends and our "Tribe." My friend found a sticker with a small totem-pole of cartoon characters that had the words "Mellow Tribe" printed on it. The sticker was placed on the front door of one of our houses, and as time passed we became known as the Mellow Tribe.

Photo by Troy Page

To my tribe members: thanks for the mellow times.

A New “Old” Tribe Discovered, Reportedly Mellow

By Sarah Westergren

Mellow Tribe Members

CALIFORNIA - A unique and clever culture, the Mellow Tribe inhabits the southern coast of California. A civilization who originated around the Emerald period can often be found in the hills of Cardiff by the Sea, and stretched east to “waiting view”, also known as Linda Vista, and south to the neighboring areas by the Pacific Ocean’s Beach.

Mino’aka

A tribe gathering, though sporadic, can number anywhere between 3 to 30 members at a time. Often engaging in tribal sounds that seem to hypnotize the people, the sound leads to a reported facial transformation. Few Mellow Tribe words have a direct translation, but in Hawaiian, a cousin language, the facial transformation is referred to as mino’aka. In American-English we know it as smiling.

The life giving energy, results in a power that filters through their main tree-house dwelling and into the surrounding lands.

The energy, once absorbed and broken down in the soil, produces evidence of its existence by its lush and edible gardens near each member’s lodging.

“Listener”

The most recent member whose name means “listener” pronounced sah-MAN-tha, is an example of the tribes overall child-like attitude and depicts a common theme of “lightness of spirit” which primarily manifests in the tribe member’s eyes.

The peaceful tribe, easily distracted by four-legged beings, has an overall bronze to their skin that exists throughout the year. It still remains a mystery as to how this smolder is sustained through all months.

Some of their unique traditions consist of didgeridoo blowing directly at each other’s hearts, eating insurmountable amounts of handmade humus and guacamole, consuming healthy amounts of Yerba Mate’, removing their clothing at the beach to be replaced with a black neoprene covering prior to submerging themselves in a large mass of water, and blowing, hitting, or banging objects referred to as “sound makers” or instruments.

Mellow “instrument”

Many tribe members have admitted to the following: touching the plant species makahiye also known as “touch me not,” routinely informing visitors of the difference between the compost and the tribe’s main salad dish that evening, and being followers of the god brothers, Chester-Buster and Walter, and have reported reaching personal enlightenment from their teachings and presence.

Makahiye

Chester Buster

Mellow Tribe outdoors near fire

“Soul Nourishment”

When not all at a tribal gathering it is said that individually each Mellowan man and woman are out gathering multiple types of soul nourishment, also known as “fun activities,” in anticipation for the next assembly. Some of these nourishments are common amongst all members while others have been known to branch outside of the typical habits. Nourishment consists of the following forms: remaining perpendicular to planks ranging from 5 to 11 feet while enduring the varying surface of a large body of water, adorning cups of cake, carving Agave trees into long hollow tubes, saddling miniature and life size horses, digitally documenting mundane events and adding drug-like induced music, stringing small glass pieces on thin clear threads for Mellow Tribe’s people, spreading a wide range of colors over a variance of surface sizes, mixing earth’s fruits for consumption, immensely perspiring in unusual postures and stances in a small enclosed area with natives of other tribes, generating vociferous sounds while rocking back and forth in public display with a device made up of a wood block painted black and 4 metal chords, feeding tortoises, recycling small clear sacks that are known to “zip and lock”, and roaming for the purpose of staring at organic wild life to “come to a mental space” of tranquility. The later of those is often performed in pairs.

The Mellow Tribe often greets one another with full body embraces, mino’akas, and an armful of edibles. The Melwomen (female tribe members) spend time mixing and creating food for the Mellow people, and though it’s challenging to decipher what they are discussing, the topics are suspected to range from personal experiences with other tribes people, animals, plant species, their Mellowmen, and their unique expressions of soul nourishment.

Melwoman

The Mellowmen, confident with themselves, retreat to what they call “hacking a sack” which necessitates the use of their feet, and if one tribesman uses his hands during this event it is common to hear a verbal disturbance expressed as the game resumes. Periodically a Melwoman will enroll herself in the game.

Mellowman and Melwoman co-mingling

Easy to mino’aka, the Mellow Tribe is a people who easily find the nectar in life. It’s difficult to not slip right into their song, comprised of a euphoric love, happiness, peace, creativity, and synchronicity within the tribe that is united with the flow and balance of the earth.

If ever graced by the presence of their people, be sure to pick up any instrument nearby and unify yourself with the sound of heaven. It’s an experience you won’t find at any resort or spa, and it’s a guarantee your molecular structure will warp into what Chester-Buster and Walter refer to as your true self.

Mellow Tribes People

Melodies and Sunshine Memories

2011-01-20T19:22:00.000-08:00

Here comes the sun... and my smile.

My brother sent me several links to the band The Radio Dept. I've been listening to their stuff, particularly Heaven's on Fire. The electric melody, poppy beat, and surf undertones awaken my summer senses and visions of youth. I'm ready to get out of work, slip on my Chuck T's, ride the day's flow, and get lost on the boardwalks and beaches of San Diego.

My teenage summers were always filled with good music, tan and leathered skin, and a continual state of dirty fingernails. I drank water and juices like they were going out of style, hardly ate a thing, and found myself energizied by oxygen and sun. I was too busy to concern myself with chores, eating, and dressing well.When I discovered boys, the added element of emotion had me singing from cloud 9, and the summers were that more fun, or maybe dramatic. With the exception of the emotional recklessness, I'm ready to slip into that attitude of warmth and sunshine and let the good times roll.

Check out my latest two favorite songs that send me down summer's memory boulevard:

I'm anticipating summer. This one is going to be unbelievably good.

Kissing and hugging you,

Sarah

Stay sunny San Diego

2011-01-17T12:41:00.000-08:00

The sun is straight up as I approach the waters edge to take witness to sea life revealing its wet backside. It's lunchtime and I have this same route planned for the remainder of the week. The forecast calls for sun everyday, and as far as I'm concerned so does my epidermis.

There is not a cloud in the sky, and the marine layer is nonexistent with the exception of the sheer joy that blankets the tourists. There is a sweetness in the afternoon, as if the earths' summer is stirring. Time will pass until the fullness of the heat and long days grace those who inhabit and the travelers who find themselves in San Diego. Meanwhile I find solace in the afternoons that are a benefit for being a resident.

A couple's afternoon stroll

Near Broadway Pier, Downtown San Diego

A smile was irresistible while taking this shot

Today consisted of many smiles and moments enthralled in beauty. I've been attracted to light and color lately. I took a picture on my drive home tonight. Once I returned home I finally put together a red bouquet of flowers.

On my way home from work. I stopped at Sunset Cliffs to watch the sunset (3rd day in a row)

My red bouquet

Xox,

Sarah

Love on my eyes

2011-01-16T20:12:00.000-08:00

Ocean Beach weather today was incredible. In the low 70's mother nature was calling people out of their houses. Around noon I took my beach cruiser and towel to the sand and fell asleep dreaming of the summer. It was warm and magnificent. With my dog, I returned to the beach minutes before sunset. It's a typical sight to see any number of people watching as the sun falls on the day. Tonight was incredible and I couldn't stop smiling. I loved the evening and what the sun left behind; colors that cast love on my eyes and peace in my being. I took several pictures, and though they may all be similar, enjoy.

Makaya

Light lovers

Tower 5

As the night winds down, I sit on the porch in the company of a freshly bathed dog, wine, and lit tiki torches.

Many smiles and hellos were exchanged today, and I wouldn't have had it any other way. Life is beautiful and so is Ocean Beach.

Wish you were here!

Xox,

Sun-kissed Sarah

My new winter

2011-01-11T06:56:00.000-08:00

The nearest ski resort is 2.8 hours from my house in San Diego and the beach is 3 minutes. (Time calculations courtesy of google maps) I don't take for granted my proximity to the beach, I fall asleep with my window open so I can smell the sea salt. Yet, I miss my home state mountains this time of year.

Flipping through winter pictures has me reminisce of the early morning winter months. I'd wake up well before sunrise, stumble to my toothbrush, disapprovingly glance at my disheveled hair and over-packed bags, saddling my nose and skirting my eyes.

Mountain gear in tow, me and company would be off to an elevation of 4,500 feet. The snow muddied tire tracks guiding all who trekked to find solace in the quite of the white and the still of the timbers. Between moments of pivots, carves, and bombing down the hill, the crisp air would have my full attention. Like clock work, by the length of the sky I'd be reminded that the earth's inhabitants are positioned high up on this massive rock rotating in space. The mountain's girth and height speak of this world's greatness and how magnificent life is. We are so small and so mighty.

Our San Diego house was home to a 5' Christmas tree. A year ago I would have thought it strange to have a Christmas tree in a house beside the ocean that keeps its windows open in December. This year it's not odd to have spent the winter holidays in San Diego. Not until the moments I can almost feel the chill of the snow, hear the quiet crisp of the mountain air, and taste the the thin air from the elements cupped by the mountains. It's those moments I miss the effort it took to plan even a simple outing to meet friends for dinner or coffee.

Whatever the season, winter, spring, summer, or autumn, it's always my favorite one. Thanks for sharing each season my dear friends. To many more!

I love you.

Xox,
Sarah

What I learned during the 2010 holidays

2011-01-03T22:21:00.000-08:00

This year was special for me. Especially because I wasn't entirely sure if I'd be able to return home to Washington. If I remained in California it was my intention to work on setting up myself to live an empowering 2011. I have several writing projects that have been in the works, and I wanted to organize my mind about a few life matters that have been weighing on me.

Fortunately I flew home on December 22nd. Due to delays I missed my connecting flight home and was comped a hotel room for the night in Salt Lake City. I appreciated the time alone. I enjoy hotels, and I wanted a full nights rest more then anything because I had been fighting an infection for over a week. Once I was home, my health rapidly improved.

During my stay in Washington I was battling with my mind. Being around my family members I felt like the same bratty little sister I've imagined myself to always be. This year it was different; I could see my old ways of being with my family and I wasn't going to be that. Afraid and not knowing how to "act" I remained quiet and kept my nose in a book. I did not go through a drastic change, but I was happy that I distinguished what I once acted like. Christmas day I was able to spend a full day up on the ski slopes with my family. It felt good to be back in the snow and cruising the mountain as I had before.

I spent a calm New Years Eve night with my parents. We saw a chic-flick and had dinner together. We watched the ball drop on television while sitting around a heater with my parent's dogs. For the first New Years I did not resist the way in which I was celebrating. I've always wanted to do something on a grand scale and dress up in a gown. This year, I was happy and at peace to spend it with Mom and Dad.

New Years day my friend Dave married the love of his life. Celebrating with his friends and family was an integral part of setting up a powerful 2011. I didn't know that then, but looking back I can see it has effected me. I was able to apologize to many friends about my past shenanigans and fess up to being a dramatic, emotionally driven, at times a psychotic controlling dominating friend. We all laughed as everyone fessed up to their own idiotic behavior, and in the process I experienced needed closure and completion. One friend asked me how I came to realize that I was being "leachy" in our friendship. I explained that it was due to conversations with new friends that had me see what kind of friend I've been. Being able to apologize for my actions in the past was important for me in having more fulfilling friendships now. Here is what I have learned from all my experiences:

I am more sure of who I am now more than ever.
I've always wanted people to see how great I am, and I made it a point to make sure others see that about me. Once relentless in doing so, I know who I am and have nothing to prove to anyone.
I love spending time with family more than I love meeting up with large masses to grace them with my California presence and show them how "great" I'm doing. (I gave up my act)
I've learned how important it is to have friends that listen for the sake of letting me clear my mind and know that I'm not my crazy thoughts.
I love reading "Success," "Do It Yourself," "Cottage Living," and "Entrepreneur."
I learned Oprah is going to launch her own Network. The network is intended to bring empowerment to people's lives and have them get what they want. Never a huge Oprah fan, I will now be subscribing to "O" (I bought my first one in the airport on my return flight home)
I learned that I like to take my time on my hair and make up and make it a point to be "put together."
I learned the correct form of using "lie" verses "lay."
I learned that I can really love and be a great friend to someone I thought that I never would speak to again in my life.
I now have a peace about what to do with family possessions if my mother and father were to ever pass. Several conversations about death ironically put me at peace.
It is highly critical that I continue to dream and read inspirational material on a regular basis.
I love my family more then ever.

The holidays were unforgettable. I have big ideas for 2011 and I'm more than elated to watch them come to fruition.

My favorite quote of this holiday season was made in passing by my own mother on Christmas day and I will never forget it, "It doesn't cost anything to dream."

I love you.

Xox,

Sarah

Note to self:

2010-12-08T22:52:00.001-08:00

Live an awesome life.

My kind of gossip

2010-10-13T22:19:00.000-07:00

Seventeen years old, sitting in drivers education in eastern Washington, an effervescent blond lit up the room with her smile and authenticity. Her confidence intimated me. I'd never seen a young woman carry herself the way she did. Her name, Melissa. I don't recall the introductions we originally exchanged 11 years ago, but from a let-me-watch-you-from-over-here attitude I was watching her and taking note of the way she interacted with others and played with life.

Melissa's voice captivated me. She delivered her words with intention and grace, and when I heard her sing I was certain this young woman was an immortal who'd been living for centuries. The way she carried herself was unseen and unheard of at my age. (I found out later that she too was 17.)

Melissa has always impressed me. During life's low points she remained dauntless. After high school we were both equally indecisive and simultaneously trying our hands at different "careers." Always involved in the community and giving back to others, Melissa also participated in pageants throughout the years. She had access and interacted in a world I'd always dreamed of, and once I had shied away from. In a sense, she was my hero. I succumbed to my own fears when I had changed my mind at the last minute to participate in a pageant at the age of 13.

One of the last times I saw Melissa was when she was in the budding stages of a long distance relationship. As usual she was giddy about the possibility of where it was going. He sounded like an amazing man, and every time I saw her I begged for updates on their latest dates as quickly as she could spit them out. That was the last I saw of Melissa. A year down the road we connected on a social networking site, and I was elated to see her beautiful wedding pictures to this man that once, only seemed like a dream. He had finally become her reality.

I've been seeking out women who exhibit fearlessness, stories of victory, and an intention to live powerfully. Melissa was one of the first women to come to mind. It's now been close to 2 years since we've last spoke, and catching up a week ago had me enamored at a far greater level. Last week she shared what she'd really been up to after we got past the initial "How are you's?" Melissa was told years ago she'd never be able to have children of her own, and she planned her future with that in mind. As she stated, "It's not like I was selfish back then, I really just had a plan for my life." Melissa became pregnant and because she wasn't married and didn't plan on a child she scheduled an abortion.

When she told me the story I was frozen. After realizing that she could have what she thought she would never have, she changed her mind and kept the baby. Melissa is now a proud mother, deeply in love with her son.

Not being a mother myself, I asked questions like, "What was the process like?" and "Do you feel different now as a woman?" and "How have you changed?" Feeling slightly naive for asking the questions, Melissa answered me with her usual grace. One of the things she said had me pull over to stop and take in her words. I wrote them down, "I read so many books on what to expect so I was prepared, and I couldn't have read enough to prepare me for what was to come." I've heard this phrase, but it felt like a deep part of me was about to be awakened if I pressed for more. "Melissa, going through that experience, would you prepare to do something even if you knew you would never know enough prior to doing it?" (I think in a sense I was really asking myself that.) Melissa paused to grasp what I was asking. Her response was, "Yes."

More than likely I'll never achieve the "enough" prior to actually accomplishing my big dreams. So as of this last week I've been asking myself the same question I asked Melissa, "Would you prepare to do something even if you knew you would never be 'ready' enough prior to doing it?"

I'm living my dreams the moment I'm in action and taking the steps to achieve the fin.

Whenever I run into Melissa it's clear she is alive and present and always standing in a glow. She has a heart of gold to match her hair, and a smile that begs you to have a seat and unfold your heart.

She has left a mark upon my life.

Xox,

Sarah

Taste-testing sounds

2010-10-07T23:00:00.000-07:00

It's Thursday night and I'm flying solo at a restaurant/bar on Newport Avenue in Ocean Beach. It's a small southern Californian beach town that to the average passerby it would appear slightly rough around the edges compared to neighboring coastal towns.

I'm in an audience of 10 others, 11 if you include the doorman, and 13 if you include the older couple sitting in the corner who are preparing to leave once the music starts. They more than likely didn't do their research prior to coming and therefor don't know this band is soon to release sounds of indie-surf. I did my research, I know the sound, and that's why I'm here.

When I got home from work this evening I perused Craigslist looking to score some last minute free tickets to any local concert. As usual there was plenty of "free fill dirt" and gadgets that even your knick-knack-hoarding grandmother wouldn't go out of her way to obtain. I looked at an events page of a local publication and found a free show to attend several blocks from my house.

As the day grew distant and the night welcomed the west coast, my bedroom invited me to stay through until the morning with its warmth accompanied by my laziness. I was growing tired, but after a glass of wine, half of a can of Trader Joes Natural Baked Beans, and the Netflix ordered Flaming Lips documentary titled The Flaming Lips: The Fearless Freaks, I decided to throw on my red checkered flannel and coconut oil and depart my bedroom world and into the night and OB world of Thursday. I budgeted $4 for the evening's events, meaning that's all the cash in my wallet so I transfered it to my pants pocket. I accidentally budgeted the perfect amount: beer specials were $4 at the Portugalia. Prior to ordering I apologized to the bartender that I didn't budget enough for a tip, nonetheless she kindly poured my Hefewiezen.

The show began, and it went on, but I decided to leave early as I've grown tired of cover songs, in fact I've never been a big fan. The music wasn't great and I realized I'd soon be standing in a larger audience of music lovers and listening to a "southern metal band," Lead Burns Red, a friend's band who is releasing their 2nd album and is playing their release party this Saturday at the Onyx Room in downtown San Diego. Check out their website and their sound at www.leadburnsred.com. For those who dig the sound and can't attend, grab your digital copy at cdbaby.com/cd/leadburnsred.

In the meantime, get your booty out to local upcoming events and stretch your creative spirit, even if you go it alone. See you at the show!

Xox,

Sarah

Waiting for corn chowder

2010-10-04T16:34:00.000-07:00

I'm at lunch alone on a Monday afternoon. I stopped by one café and when I wasn't satisfied with the soup of the day I turned around and moved on to another restaurant serving up my soup of choice: corn chowder. It's overcast and wet outside here in San Diego, but my heart is quite the opposite.

A friend was sitting in my room yesterday and crying tears of deep joy and relief when she articulated the words with a soulful push, "I can feel that things are changing for us both, and I'm just so happy we're finally going to get what we want."

I fell in love with her even more in that moment. When she opens up it unmasks this profound human side of her that I long for in all my friendships. My body seems to pulsate with the heartbeat of the earth when I have conversations that come from the very vein of emotion running within people. Our conversation left me warm and beyond hopeful for this next stage in my life.

While at lunch and waiting for my corn chowder a memory came to mind. Years ago I was sitting in a restaurant in Bend, Oregon, with my best friend and love at that time. We both agreed we would visit that café as a trip-tradition. I was sure that we would both experience that moment again and again throughout our lifetime. It's not going to happen, and I'm so happy it's not. I was overwhelmed back then by the love I felt for him, and now I'm overwhelmed with the love I have for life and I'm sitting in that feeling of love right now.

I'll pass up a relationship and a bowl of soup until I find exactly what I want, even if I go hungry for a little while.

I am where I am, and I love it. I'm alone eating lunch on a cold fall day, unattached, and living with a knowledge that all the possibility in the world is staring me in the face.

Xox,

Sarah

Bruno and friends

2010-10-02T16:18:00.000-07:00

Makaya, my "Good girl"

Several weeks back I took my dog Makaya (pictured above) to Petco to get some much needed dog treats and accessories. While purchasing my goods, the cashier asked if I'd like to round up my purchase to the nearest dollar and donate money to support a local pet organization (I don't remember which one or what I was supporting) ...I said yes. I paid a little extra and in return the cashier graciously gave me 2 rolled sausage dog treats and 2 tennis balls. Makaya was treated and I was proud to finally say yes and give money to a good cause, even if I only donated 21¢ .

That donation inspired me to continue giving. Just outside Petco was San Diego's Second Chance Dog Rescue. Two large play pins contained spirited pups and smiling volunteers. The people were happy and the dogs were happier; it was hard to deny that life was good for everyone in that 40 ft. radius. I stopped by the organization's booth and after speaking with several of the friendly volunteers I filled out a volunteer application.

Two weeks later I received an email asking for my support at the next event. My schedule was clear and I said yes once again! Today I met many great volunteers ranging from young girls participating to accumulate community service hours for their school, to a German woman who moved here 7 weeks ago and was in need of some animal love! The system Second Chance Dog Rescue uses is all volunteer based. Doggies get to be treated to temporary loving homes until a family comes along and adopts the dog into their own home.

This morning, one of my initial duties was to sign dogs in as the foster parents dropped off the pooches. When a temporary foster dropped off "Bruno" an American Eskimo-mix, the foster mom, Julie, became silent for a moment. At first I didn't know why she wasn't answering a question I asked her, but I then realized that she'd fallen in love with Bruno in a weeks time.

Bruno

I could feel her pain in that moment; she was about to leave him. If someone was to adopt him that was the last time Julie would see Bruno. I reached out and put my hand on her shoulder. Bruno looked a little confused when he left Julie and entered the pin full of rowdy-happy puppies. It was an innocent and unexpected separation that brought me to a quiet stillness. I'd hoped that either Bruno was adopted into an amazing family that day or that Julie would return to find him hers again if not for another week. Either way it was for sure to be a win for one of them. It was in that moment of watching Bruno and Julie that I understood: volunteering isn't only giving up time, space, or money. Volunteering is giving a part of yourself that cannot be measured. Julie and Bruno will forever remind me of the bond that can be formed when 2 experience what it is for 1 to be selfless and the other to be in need.

During my volunteer time I was able to run around with my camera. The pictures shown are from today. I took the picture of Makaya (shown at the beginning of this post) after I returned home from volunteering. After spending time with all the hounds, I couldn't wait to get home to my buddy.


San Diego Second Chance Dog Rescue Volunteers

Slider has feeling in his legs, but he can't use them.

Slider gets bandaged by a volunteer.

If you're not in the San Diego area and you're interested in finding out more about volunteering at a local pet adoption agency, please contact your local veterinarian or pet store and ask for information. Give back to the community in some way, and be sure to give back in a manner that you feel drawn to help. If you don't have money, then give your time, do administrative work, take pictures, make phone calls or send emails. Help in a way that leaves you fulfilled. Volunteering isn't sacrificing, it's using and giving of the already abundant skills and resources that exist in your life.

Go love the world!

Xox,

Sarah

Rosie the Riveter didn't wear a watch

2010-09-28T22:26:00.000-07:00

Tonight I cried. At first I cried out of frustration and then it felt like all the emotions that I could possibly contain at once had suddenly collided. I couldn't decipher joy from pain. I couldn't distinguish the inner woman from my inner child. It was as if the two were embracing each other while screaming so loud that neighboring galaxies could hear their cry.

My "world" was loud in my moment of emotional-supernova and I was fed up with the chaos. I suddenly wanted power and peace like I've never had it.

I've been waiting for things, people, circumstances, and myself to "perfectly align" with what I think SHOULD happen before I can make grandiose moves to fulfill my dreams. Truthfully, I've been waiting for my husband to complete my life, and that's only one area of many that I had been waiting. Throughout my lifetime I've heard and have been told my husband won't complete me. I knew it to be true, but it became real when I looked at all the areas of my life that I've been waiting. Let me share my evening experience:

I received a wedding invitation from my dearest male friend from my home town. I've known him since we were both eleven years old. As we've grown older we've grown closer. He's held me accountable, pushed me to pursue my dreams, given me grace, and remained steadfast in our friendship. If I am capable of loving a man as much as I've loved my friend how much more can I love the man of my dreams? I don't know the answer to that, but I can tell you I've been waiting longingly for such a man.

A pit in my stomach grew deeper with envy and jealousy after reading through the sections of "How we met" and "The proposal" on their wedding site. I wanted to know where my soul mate was. Don't I deserve a fairy tale? I found my stomach-pit revolting when I realized I hadn't initially chosen happiness at the realization of how deep their love was for each other.

I felt low in that moment. As usual my dear friend and roommate came home at the perfect time and asked the question "What's going on with you?" and thus began our conversation. My answer was provided in the form of tears, and my friend knows me well enough to just let me "ride" my Sarah-train. After letting 'er rip through words and tears I realized that when I "wait for life to happen" this gets me off the hook for taking the actions necessary to get what I want in life. For example, I've been waiting to buy a large camera so I look more like a fashion photographer when approaching strangers on the street instead of using the point and shoot that I currently own. I've let life happen to me, instead of making life happen.

Well my friends, I think it's about time we take this bull that we call "Life" by the horns and steer it where we actually want to go.

Where do you want to go? What dream do you want to accomplish? Is there something you haven't done yet because your waiting? If yes, define what you're waiting for.

Be honest with yourself with this next question, and you don't have to tell anyone your answer if you don't want to:

Is what you're waiting for really a requirement to accomplish what you want or would getting what you're waiting for make achieving your dream easier?

So you've been "waiting" for something to happen; how's that working for you?

When I see that I'm "waiting" for something I just go do it! Tonight I was studying and I was waiting for my roommate to walk by to ask him to turn on a light. Instead of waiting I got up and did it myself and it felt great. All of a sudden I had the power to do what I wanted! I've been studying for a test, and instead of waiting until I felt like studying this evening I just started studying.

I'm looking forward to this change playing out in bigger areas of my life. I understand that it takes confidence to go do something that I wouldn't normally do, and when I take the initiative and try something new it's best if I allow myself some room to screw it up. It's more fun to mess it up then to play it safe.

An interview with Drew Barrymore was one of the many articles in October's Bazaar that I poured over last night. Drew is quoted to say, "I never have been insecure, because I see what a waste it is." Reading that last night may have paved the way to my realization of my own time wasting.

I'm ready to love life again.

Xox,

Sarah

PS. You're going to see some new posts my friends. The long awaited story will soon be made public. In addition, I'm now a volunteer for a local dog rescue organization here in San Diego that gives dogs a second chance at a loving family. I'll be helping out at my first event this Saturday, and I'll keep you posted!

The perks of jerk pulls

2010-07-28T09:46:00.000-07:00

Alright ladies, who doesn’t like to double-take an attractive guy? Do you not coyly watch an attractive man from a distance while salivating? How many of you can’t help but rubber neck when you see a guy who looks like he just stepped off the shoot for GQ’s August cover? I have and I’m glad I was wearing mirrored sunglasses that morning.

I’ll be honest, sometimes I feel guilty putting the shoe on the other foot and ogling, but when there is beauty in front of me I want to stare in wonderment. I know us females aren’t the “visual” type of the two sexes, but I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that I am and I wouldn’t be astonished if a few more of you ladies came out of the woodwork. We can appreciate beauty amongst each other in the hen house, and some of us may have a hard time admitting to it but we check out the other roosters, a lot.

I can appreciate a good looking guy, and what’s even more attractive is a guy of great character, but let’s be real - most of you women reading this are still single and you haven’t quite been able to land the guy who has both the GQ assets and the cowboy-character-quality to tame a wild mustang that you’re looking for, and yes… the man of your dreams would do it and in a pair of classic Levi’s, and he looks something like this guy.

If you’ve read this far and you are frustrated that I’m elaborating on a shallow topic, I’ll let you know that I do have a point, however you might not like it. Thanks for getting this far, please press on my beautiful friend!

I was getting my semi-annual pedicure several Saturday’s ago, and I felt it was well deserved even if my pocket book didn’t indicate so. The Friday night prior to my indulgence consisted of an unplanned 6.5 mile run heading north along the California coast line, in which during my shin-splints intensified, and still I kept going. Why you might ask, because I couldn’t fill my line of site or my nose up with enough wide shouldered men and Aqua De Gio; both two regular Friday night attendees of the San Diego boardwalk. My legs were hurting, there was no question, but I would pay the extra $5 for a 10 minute calf massage the following morning for the price of taking in the scenery. The male pheromones were acting like natural steroids, and I wanted to swim in the testosterone.

For the record, I can scrub my own feet, rub my own legs, and paint my own nails, but there is something different about getting pampered. Let me tell you why I was really at the nail salon. I feel likened to Esther readying herself for her King. I feel like I’m preening my feathers for a mate. While I was gyrating in the salon’s massage chair I realized that I, as many women do, was indulging in a ritual of beautification; a rarity nowadays for me, and not because I’m lazy or I don’t have time, but because I’ve transformed in the area of spending my well earned money. I find myself engaging in free activities much more than I use to, and they are fairly healthy activities. I run no less than 2 miles a day several times a week, I spend more time outside then I once did by walking the dog or playing at the beach. I read up on subjects and events that actually interest and inspire me, and since I’ve started to I feel CONSIDERABLY more attractive. I should say I feel more attractive to myself which in turn increases my confidence, and thus results in being attractive to the opposite sex. Confidence is my latest accessory.

I used to artificially tan (minimum $20 a month) the result: an olive-orange tint. Color my hair (anywhere from $8 from a drug store’s box to $70 at the salon) result: a gamble every time; to say the least, I didn’t always like my hair color. Bi-weekly manicure and pedicure ($40 with tip) result: less in the bank account and nail color I could have bought for $8 that would last me two years. A membership to a gym ($30 a month) result: going 3 times a month, little-to-no routine, and no quality male suspects as I had expected. There is plenty of muscle to be had, but definitely no GQ or cowboy characters standing around the bench press waiting to ask me for my phone number.

The list goes on, and I only mention the above because I used to partake in the indulgence which would leave a hefty dent in my wallet and a phone call to the parentals asking them for moral and financial support.

Buying those things did not leave me fulfilled or feeling beautiful and alive. What does leave me feeling that way is running on the sidewalks of my own neighborhood; I see more of my local surroundings, and get a greater sense of community by seeing the same people regularly, and it sure beats seeing the meatheads in the gyms I attended. It’s also FREE!

In addition, I spend time in local shops as a result of running by them. Which contributes to the support of local mom-and-pop joints that I once swore I would never work outside of. It’s almost become a Saturday morning tradition for me to go to a local café called Newbreak, order my favorite latte and baklava and read up on fashion, travel, and wild-whimsical women.

Lastly, I eat healthier! I love shopping in the fruit and veggie section of the local People’s market. When I’m physically active, I have a natural tendency to take in what the earth’s surface brings out.

Other bonuses are clearing of the complexion, stamina, slimming down, increased energy, etc … and this all happens because I’m physically fit, and the fitness has taken the form that I love to engage in, and it’s free.

What I am getting at is that us women should spend less time buying the things that we think make us look beautiful, and instead get our beautiful bums out the front door into mother nature and PLAY! Guys LOVE to play, and they are fiery over women who know how to have fun. I promise, that if you forgo something small this month, and in turn at the very least replace it with a 30 minute physical activity every couple days, your smile will be brighter, your confidence will start to break through the glass ceiling, and your honey (or potentials) will take notice. Let’s face it, even if a guy isn’t the immediate result of your new pursuits, you’re more than likely to transform into a new lifestyle and a healthy way of being.

Going back to what I said, I love a man who is in shape, and more often than not I date a guy with muscle. (If he doesn’t have muscle his music abilities make up for it.) But now I see that if I want a guy who is in shape, he more than likely appreciates a woman with a great physique. I’m not saying I forgo my own health or personal morals to change myself for a man. No, in fact the opposite! I am more confident in pursuing my favorite physical fitness to live a healthier more powerful existence, and in the meantime I will cross my fingers that I attract my GQ-Keith Urban.

For those of you who are blessed with the love of your life don’t think you’re going to get off the hook easily. Your guy digs you, and probably loves you to no end… even if he’s got a little more going on around the mid-section than you’d prefer, that doesn’t mean you can’t get your hot-pants into new workout maneuvers. He’s into you, but what if you were to present the transformed you - and I’m talking about the “boss woman” that you are - not the physical Suzanne Summers you’ve never wanted to be.

Girls, take a “me” night this week and stay in, soak your feet, shape your own eyebrows, clean up your cuticles, all while sporting a face mask that’s been collecting dust at the back of your hallway closet. Load your ridiculously favorite romantic chick flick into your DVD player, pour your favorite drink, and let the good times roll!

The challenge is to spend less money on yourself this month, work your bootylicious body out, and once you do that… your beauty will begin to emerge like you’ve wanted it to. I’d encourage you to cut back on spending money, and be more physically active. Did you love riding your tricycle as a little girl? Get back on a 2-wheeled land cruiser! Loved building forts with the boys around the neighborhood? Get going on the projects in the yard this summer! Feeling lazy and loved being poolside with all your childhood girlfriends gabbing over Devon Sawa in Tiger Beat? Grab Augusts’ issue of Vanity Fair and pour over the articles that fuel your heart.

Bottom line, do you want a good looking guy? Be a beautiful bombshell to yourself!

Make purchases that you actually love to treat yourself with, and let the other “perks” take the back burner.

Xox,

Sarah

To you, from thine own heart.

2010-07-26T21:44:00.000-07:00

“Thank you.” I mean it from the depths of my heart. I have received amazing feedback and incredible encouragement to continue writing. Your emails, phone calls, text messages, and conversations have indicated the impact my expressions have had on you.

Since I was a little girl, I longed to make a difference and to one day see the influence I’ve had on people, and thus… that journey has begun.

To provide proof as to how much your encouragement means to me, I broke out a readily available box appropriately labeled “Words” that I keep on my desk at home. I have photographed its contents for your viewing pleasure. For several decades I have stowed away things as small as notes scribbled on café napkins to hand written 5 page letters. Each item is either words of thank you, affirmations, encouragement, or acknowledgements for the silliest of times I’ve spent with people. At any job I’ve ever had email at I create a file titled “W,” and I keep emails available for when I need a little pick me up in the day. It's simple, I save words because I cherish them. I am sharing this with you because I want you to experience the impact you not only have on me, but can have on the remaining world population that you so happen to grace your presence with. Whether its your written or your spoken word, you have the ability to contribute to the life of others.

When I was young my little brother and I each had a miniature mail drop that we’d leave outside our bedroom doors. For several weeks we would write notes and leave them in each other’s tin mailbox. I found one of his notes that read, “I’re sary that I choket you and puncht you but I still love you and I hope we dont get in a fite.” (He was 6 when he wrote it.)

Here is a snap shot of my favorite book since 1996, the Thesaurus. It has been well loved and well-travelled.

I would like to share with you what I’m up to with this blog. I have an intention and I suspect as time passes the direction may change. The current theme is to empower people, to move them, to bring you to moments of contemplation through the written word. I want you to enjoy the guilty pleasure of thinking about yourself and what moves you to feeling powerful and “fearless” so you have the ability to transport yourself there, day or night.

In the meantime, I wait in eagerness to hear what you’re doing in your life that moves you powerfully. What makes you, you? What lights a fire under your rump every morning, every afternoon, evening and night?

Your words are fuel to my fire. Thank you.

Xox,

Sarah

PS. I have interviewed fierce women on the topic of power and their experience of “fearlessness.” Many men have openly contributed their involvement in regards to what it’s like to be with their woman in her moment of fearlessness. The article is still underway, please stay tuned!

Words that move a woman

2010-07-19T21:09:00.000-07:00

I once heard that it's important for a single woman to be hugged at least 6 times a day. I don't know whether or not the number is statistically correct, however I do understand the importance of touch. I often go several weeks without something as simple as someone brushing my arm, and then I notice that a hug sends me into an emotional spiral and I recognize I've been missing the physical attention of another human being. To clarify, it's not necessarily a form of a romantic physical connection I'm speaking of, but the same feeling you might get when your mother or close friend hugs you or taps your leg during a conversation.

A similar reaction was stirred in me with the use of a single word this morning. I received a text message from a relative who I recently formed a powerful bond with. He began a text message with the endearing name "Baby" and I was basically thrusted into the same emotional-fit physical touch has on me. My entire life, I have appreciated the power of a word, but this morning's word emphasized an internal personal craving. The innocent use of the name “baby” knocked me off my morning routine, and I was emotionally shaken like something had been called forth from the depths of my soul.

A word that routinely rolls off my lips was directed at me, and I was overwhelmed by the powerful reaction I had. I am the friend to quickly nickname or refer to people as something other than their legal first name, but the tables had been turned. What I thought was a playful way of referring to my friends, was actually what I had been longing for myself. For the first time in my life I recognize how important it is to me that the men I dearly love use choice words when we converse. I see the impact words have on my heart, and I long for the nectar of adoration that drips rich in their vocabulary. For any young girl or woman, it is almost necessary and certainly healthy to be adored by the men closest to them (fathers, brothers, relatives, friends, etc..) and something as simple as "Hun" from any of them can fill my love cup up for days.

I draw from the love of those around me, as most everyone does, and I'm encouraged by their recognition of my presence in their life. It is important to me to know I've touched people or have moved them in some way. Since I tend to use words to communicate my ardor and loyalty, it profoundly affects me when others return the favor in the same form; it melts me. As I age, my desire increases to encourage people through the spoken word to press forward in life and achieve what they truly want.

Even if am never told that I've influenced or have moved someone I would still like to think I have stirred even complete strangers I've only had the pleasure to smile at.

If you know a single woman or man, be sure to embrace them or acknowledge who they are to you and your life.

Xox (If I could physically “Xox” each of you I would)

Sarah

On Texas' time

2010-07-19T19:24:00.000-07:00

I left San Diego Wednesday morning and returned home Sunday evening. Check out several days of my travels....
Wednesday, July 14, 2010

I'm currently sitting in the Denver airport at Gate B54, waiting to board a flight to Dallas. Tomorrow I will be attending my aunt's memorial service and spending time with relatives I haven't seen in 23 years. It's during times of travel that I feel free, I feel alive, and at peace with myself. I feel like a woman who can stand on top of the world with fearlessness. (And in that moment I feel like any man's dream – I’ll expound more on this later - men, you'll want to check that blog out, I'll be interviewing women so you can gain a little insight on what to do when a woman is feeling that raw power) It's the journey, and the thrill of knowing anything can happen that brings me to levels of freedom. The feeling stirs me to a deep sense of power, an untouchable, immovable power. Traveling is a seductive dance with time and geography, and I am aroused by the adventure.

Many have already stated the following regarding our advancement, but I'm deeply elated with the capability of being able to travel to three major cities in one day. Of course more earth has been covered in a day, but this travel time is specific to me, and I feel alive right now.

Of course I don't always feel so powerful. I’m an occasional stubborn, always independent, know-it-all, self-titled cool woman. Due to these “qualities” I missed my flight from San Diego to Denver this morning because I wanted to keep my cool by walking through the airport at an I’m-comfortable-with-life pace. Looking back at the morning mishaps, it is clear that I'm in my mind much of the time. I'm continually trying to achieve a state of looking good and avoiding looking bad. I’ve taken a make-believe chill pill. I’m now content and enamored with the current state of my wanderlust.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Note to self: Write a blog on the relationships from a woman’s point of view. Elaborate on how a lack of confidence can be a deal breaker. Emphasis on the “approach and pounce” method and how detrimental it can be. Yuck!

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Though I'm flying home after a long weekend with family and new friends I find myself unusually optimistic. Perhaps it's the good company I was with, or it's the current realization that life actually IS good and that the control I’ve tried to have on life was completely unnecessary. Speaking with a cousin of mine only reaffirmed a longing to encourage women to be bold and confident with who they are. Another cousin was an astonishing example of what a husband and father can be and has therefore caused me to readjust my sites. I was able to spend time with beautiful children who clearly understand the real beauty in life and how to be the very essence of joy. The time spent with them reassures me that I will one day be a spectacular mother. All in all, I will wait for these things.

There is more I wish to accomplish before adding more responsibilities, and this includes constantly loving those who surround and support me. At the end of this weekend I still cannot forget to acknowledge what brought us all together: my beautiful, free-spirited aunt. Though she passed over a month ago, we celebrated her life this week. Thank you to my cousins, and thank you to my Aunt Linda, you are forever loved.

I also want to acknowledge my cousin Angela for being a powerful inspiration to me and to, I suspect, so many other women. I'm proud to have you in our family.

All my love,

Sarah