A Laugh A Day

Extra Cash - For Real!

2012-05-01T11:02:00.001-02:30

Superpoints is an easy way to make a little extra cash. Earn points and redeem them; you won't get rich but you can earn a little extra dough! I've earned over 1000 points and reached gold level membership in one day! You can too.
http://superpoints.com/refer/brownzey

Does Size Matter?

2012-02-20T18:02:00.000-03:30

Pregnant woes

2012-02-13T12:13:00.000-03:30

Since I became pregnant, my breasts, rear-end, and even my feet have grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?
~Yes, your bladder.

The elephant

2012-02-07T14:02:00.002-03:30

Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A. "How do you breath through something so small?"

Now I have returned!

2012-02-06T20:00:00.001-03:30

So I was gone for a very long time. Kinda forgot about this blog. Glad I found it again though. I will try to keep up to date with it from here on out, promise. :D

OMG! Lol

2012-02-06T19:59:00.000-03:30

2010-12-07T10:42:00.002-03:30

God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her and foolish, that she might love him.

Rattlesnake Bite

2010-12-06T09:20:00.000-03:30

Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. "I’ll go into town for a doctor," the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the town’s only doctor, who is delivering a baby. "I can’t leave," the doctor says. ‘But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground." The guy ruins back to his friend, who is in agony. ‘What did the doctor say?" the victim asks. "He says you’re gonna die."

A Great way to get more traffic to your site!!

2010-11-29T12:05:00.000-03:30

I know this isn't a joke but bear with me. This is a great little gizmo I stumbled across and I wanted to share it too. The best part is it is FREE. Actually free with no strings attached. You click a couple times and you got it. No Credit cards, phone numbers or PIN numbers required. :D Just click on the link below to get started. I didn't believe it was free at first either but you have to try this. :D

http://trafficsword.com/024444

Counting

2010-11-29T10:11:00.000-03:30

One man said to the other, "You know, there are really only three kinds of people in the world: those who can count, and those who can't.

Canon LS-82Z Calculator

The Best E-Reader around. Get one for christmas!

2010-11-18T11:26:00.002-03:30

Kindle Wireless Reading Device, Wi-Fi, 6" Display, Graphite - Latest Generation

Blonde Computer Virus.

2010-11-18T11:25:00.002-03:30

On Your Knees!

2010-11-17T09:02:00.000-03:30

Can't get my slipper on!!

2010-11-16T18:35:00.000-03:30

A Woman's Wish

2010-11-11T19:48:00.002-03:30

The bride tells her husband

2010-11-04T13:22:00.000-02:30

The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know
anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"

"OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'the
prison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is: put the
prisoner in the prison.

And then they made love for the first time.

Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction.

Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped."

Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him."

After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes but
the girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives him
a suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!"

The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a recently
born foal.

Afterwards, he lays back on the bed, totally exhausted.

She nudges him and says, "Honey, the prisoner escaped again."

Limply turning his head, He YELLS at her, "Hey, its not a life sentence,
OKAY!

Size Matters

2010-11-02T16:18:00.000-02:30

Alien Abduction

2010-11-01T15:51:00.000-02:30

0 to 200 in 6 seconds

2010-10-31T10:48:00.002-02:30

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really pissed.

She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!"

The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought
the box back in the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Bob has been missing since Friday.

Two guys in a Bar

2010-10-27T09:07:00.001-02:30

Two guys are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, "I slept with your mother!"

The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do. The first again yells, "I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!"

The other says, "Go home dad you're drunk."

The Redneck Lottery Winner

2010-10-24T21:44:00.002-02:30

A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Austin to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number.
The Redneck says, "I want my $20 million."
The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you a million today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 years."
The Redneck said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it."
Again, the man explains that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 19 years.
The Redneck, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my $20 million right now, then I want my dollar back!"

Gambling

2010-10-23T20:44:00.000-02:30

It was little Johnny's first day in a new school, so his father looked up the teacher. He told her that little Johnny was a good kid but that he was an avid gambler. He warned her that little Johnny might win lunch money from the other kids if he was not watched closely.
The teacher did not seem disturbed, assured the father that she had handled many such problems and was very capable of taking care of little Johnny's urge to gamble.
Shortly after lunch, the father called the teacher and asked her how things were going.
"Oh, everything is going very well." She said. "I think I may have cured little Johnny of his gambling habit."
The father asked her what had happened.
"The little tyke absolutely insisted on betting me ten dollars that I had a mole on my rear." She said. "I finally agreed to the bet and took him to the teacher's lounge to show him that I had no mole."
"Damn!" The father said. "He bet me fifty dollars this morning that he would see the teacher's ass before the day was over."

I Like The Way You're Thinking

2010-10-22T21:37:00.000-02:30

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question. "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left ?"
"None.",replied Johnny. "'cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like the way you are thinking."
Little Johnny said, "I have a question for you now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nevously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger. But I like the way you are thinking."

Beautiful

2010-10-21T10:30:00.002-02:30

One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands for who could use the word 'beautiful' in the same sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.
"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully," he said.
"Excellent, Michael!" Then, the teacher called on Little Johnny.
"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said, 'Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!'"

Mysterious Tracks

2010-10-20T16:35:00.002-02:30

Two dumb blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks.
The first dumb blond said "These look like deer tracks,"
and the other one said, "No, they look like moose tracks."
They argued and argued for a while and they were still arguing when the train hit them.