Life With Boys

Where'd She Go????

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Tue, 20 Aug 2013 20:49:00 +0000

So, I've taken a hiatus from blogging.

It was not intended but as I look back and realize I've not written anything for FIVE MONTHS, I guess I have to call it something. So, "hiatus" it is!

What have we been doing over here? Well, normal Life With Boys kinds of things. My kids have been busy this summer, we've taken a few Up North vacations this summer, I've read a lot of books, I've walked the dog a lot, we've played in the pool, gone to the library. You know, typical summer stuff.

Note that I didn't mention "garden" in that short list.

My vegetable garden? Yeah, well, it's lookin' a little sad. Pathetic, actually.

Back in late April or early May, I was in the thick of getting kids to and fro, getting dinner on the table, getting up and the crack of dawn for Boot Camp, busy going here and doing this and that. I decided that we needed to TAKE A BREAK from our crazy schedules. (not like on "Friends," just an actual break.) I didn't sign Bryce up for Tball, I didn't send Brett to our church day camp, we decided as a family that Brendan wouldn't work at a Boy Scout camp this summer (which necessitates us driving him back & forth two hours each way EVERY weekend.)

We just said "NO" to extra stuff.

Which for me also included the garden.

I've been focusing on myself the past couple of months. Selfish? Maybe. Long overdue? Definitely. Working out, walking, eating better, trying to be more in the moment with the kids. The garden? Well, the garden takes a ton of my time and this summer, I just needed to not do it.

We've survived our first year without my husband's parents, who were tragically killed last summer. This might've factored into my "no garden" thing this summer. After they died, I completely lost my garden "mojo." Not that having an empty garden will bring them back, but I think losing them kind of triggered my husband and I both into thinking about what is really important.

Without going totally philosophical on you, let me just say that I'm back. I'm blogging. And I'm more fabulous than I've been in a long time.

It wouldn't be "Life With Boys" without a silly boy thing, so here goes:

Bryce, "Brett is awesome, Mom!"
Me, to Brett, "Does that make you feel better about when Bryce is a stinker to you?"
Brett, "Well, it makes me confident that he still does care."

I'm confident. I still care. I'm back!!!!

Mom Does Something For Herself!

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 09:30:00 +0000

I should repeat--I'm actually doing something for ME. Besides gardening. I grow things because I like to, I also garden to feed my family so that doesn't really count.

I write about my boys. Everyday I do stuff for my boys. For the puppy. For my husband. For Cub Scouts. For Robotics. For this. For that.

All that stuff isn't about me.

High time I do something-anything-for ME.

Enter BOOT CAMP. Sounds boy-ish, right? A friend from church had a string of FB status updates all about Boot Camp and the stuff they were doing. And it intrigued me. I messaged her and she told me all about it-and, she offered to go with me to try out the Boot Camp location near me.

So I did.

I should back up and add that I've always viewed myself as a tomboy. My college friends might call it something else, but I'll stick with "tomboy" for the purposes of this post. I like sports. I like watching sports. I like playing sports. I like working out-truly-I like to sweat. I just haven't been working out for a whole bunch of reasons, but not because I don't like to do so. I wouldn't even call it "lazy" because honestly, "lazy" just isn't a word to describe anything about me.

If you read the ABOUT section here on the blog, one of the reasons for writing this blog is to try to find ME in this house of testosterone. Life has kinda gotten in the way of ME being me for oh, the past 15 years. Coincidentally, my oldest is 15. Crazy, right? A whole lotta stuff has gotten in the way of ME. C-section complications. Depression. Basal Cell Carcinoma. Law Suits. Losing an historic family home. Job loss. Miscarriages. Chronic back pain. Depression. Bryce's horrible food allergies. Depression. Bryce's speech. Bryce's GI troubles. Bryce's ER trips. Most recently, the tragic loss of Brad's parents.

I don't want this to be cause for a pity party. I'm also not making excuses. Life has had it's bad moments the past 15 years--but it's also had a lot of good moments. Truly, more good moments than bad. But the thread running through it all is that all those moments have gotten in the way of ME and being who I am. It's not that I just sat back and allowed life to consume ME-I was IN the middle of all that stuff, after all. I just lost sight of ME and really allowed ME to drift out of the picture.

I've been quoted as saying, "I'm not even on my own to-do list." Truth.

Ok, so back to the friend from church (Cheryl) and Boot Camp. Cheryl met me at the gym (at 5:30 AM) and motivated me through what was the toughest physical thing I'd done in a long time.

I loved it. I bought a Groupon for 4 weeks of Boot Camp and I told my friend Rachel she should do it, too. She has also lost her sense of "ME" in her house of boys and is fighting back to be herself. Please check out her blog-she's an AWESOME writer. So now, Rachel and I are partners in crime, going to Boot Camp every morning at the crack of dawn. Well, before the crack of dawn. But we go 5 days a week, sometimes 6.

We love it. I love it. I *needed* it.

I was on a scrapbooking weekend a few weeks ago with my best friends from college and I told them that I finally felt like the old Dort was back. (my college peeps call me Dort.) Since this group of girls has been with me through all the stuff over the past 15 years and they've known me for 25 years, they would be the first to disagree with me if I were wrong.

But they didn't. They agreed--I'm the most like myself than I've been in recent years. And they're happy for me! Most of all, I'm happy for me.

Is is going to Boot Camp daily for the past 9 weeks and losing almost 12 pounds and 9 inches that made me finally be ME again? Not directly. It's going to Boot Camp daily-for ME-and doing something with Rachel and all the lovely women I've met at Boot Camp. It's pushing myself physically for no other reason than to push myself physically. It's doing things at Boot Camp that I didn't know I could do. Squat thrusts. Push ups (real ones, not always girl ones!). Planks. Bicep curls with 20lb dumbbells. 1000 reps. 100 squats. Pushing every.single.muscle to it's limit. Then getting up the next day and doing it again. For fun.

I do this for ME so I can be better with THEM.

Food Allergies Still Suck.

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sun, 17 Mar 2013 13:12:00 +0000

I haven't written about Bryce's food allergies in a while mostly because, well, they're pretty static. No real changes. No new allergies, thank goodness. But also no reduction in allergies. If you're a new reader, Bryce is allergic to: Dairy, Egg, Wheat, Rye, Peanut, Tree Nut, Sesame, Cinnamon, and maybe mustard. He cannot tolerate soy as it flares his eczema. He's proven to be anaphylactic to ALL of those listed allergens, so this is some serious stuff.

I had Bryce in for his 5 year well child visit last week. He's missed most of these "well child" appointments because he's at the doctor so much! The pediatrician he sees is great and she herself has a child with food allergies. Additionally, she knows Bryce's allergist personally and that is very helpful as they have the same mindset regarding Bryce & vaccines, Bryce & school, Bryce & eating, etc.

Here's the bad news--and the reason why I do not understand why people take their children off whole categories of food without solid evidence it's necessary: Bryce is sliding off the growth charts. I've managed to keep his weight in the 90% via as much healthy food (bacon, anyone?) as I can get in him, but his growth is starting to stall out. He was in the low 90% at age 3, the low 80% at age 4, and now at age 5, he's slipped to the 73%.

For many families, this would be normal. In our family, this is not normal. The ped agrees--Bryce is smaller of stature than he likely would be were he consuming a full range of foods. My husband is tall. I am tall. My cousins are tall. Heck, Brad is Dutch--100% Dutch, and we all know that the Dutch are the tallest "race" of people on Earth. My older 2 boys have consistently been off the chart for height since birth (Bryce, too, actually). My 9th grader is 6 feet tall and my 4th grader is almost 5 ft tall. Bryce is supposed to be tall!

But now, he stalls. He hasn't changed shoe size in almost 1 year. Is he healthy otherwise? Yes. No real illnesses this winter (knock on wood as winter is NOT over!) He's enjoying school. He's learning to read. He's learning to add.

He's not growing. A friend commented something to the effect of "he's shorter than you expected, what's the big deal?" Maybe she wasn't so crass as that, but that was the basic premise. She's right-it's not a big deal. He's healthy and we're keeping him safe from his allergens.

But so much of who I am as a person is wrapped around BEING TALL. I am TALL. My kids are TALL. My family tree is full of TALL. Bryce is supposed to be TALL. I don't want him to be short. I don't want him to look at his older brothers who will both likely top 6 feet and have him be sad because he isn't tall, too.

It sucks enough that he has to eat differently from everyone else.

It sucks enough that he has to carry around drugs to save his life everywhere he goes.

He shouldn't have to be short.

Food allergies suck.

Newton the Babysitter.

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Tue, 12 Mar 2013 12:14:00 +0000

This photo pretty much sums up what we love about Newfoundland Dogs around here. They are so dedicated to their families, especially the children under their care. Newton is about 4.5 months old in this photo and about 55 pounds (1/3 of his adult size). He sat at the fence, patiently watching Bryce play with the neighbors next door. He sat like this, without moving, for almost 45 minutes. Never laid down. Never changed position, other than turning his head side to side as Bryce & the other children ran and played. Heck, he didn't even move when I came out to snap this photo!

I know that lots of dogs and dog breeds are dedicated to their families, but there is something special about a PUPPY whose instincts have already kicked in and enabled him to do what he's supposed to do. Newton is one super dog.

Newton the Newfoundland, 4 months old

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Thu, 28 Feb 2013 10:00:00 +0000

Our Newfie pup, Newton, is now 4 months old and weighs in at 50 pounds. He's adorable, but never get a puppy in the winter. It's messy and you have to constantly go outside with a puppy in the snow, sleet, hail, wind, freezing temperatures and what not. Newfoundland puppy fur is a snow magnet & he's a hot mess most days. That said, this pooch is so fun to have around!

He really is a great puppy and truly does not get into much. He mostly picks up whatever stray toy or item is left within reach and is quite good about letting us take it from him. He kennels up nicely at night and is doing better with car rides and leash walking. He has learned "sit" and "down." The only trouble spot we're working on currently is his table manners--as in, how HE behaves when we're sitting at the table eating. He likes to try to jump on the table or on our laps to get at the food. It's a work in progress!

He has learned to love ice cubes and "begs" for one each time we get ice for our drinks. How does he beg? He sits in front of the fridge and gives us his most pathetic look, similar to this shot of him outside:

He is a pro at ringing his bell to let us know he wants out. How did we train him to do this? Simple. I tied the bell to the doorwall ("sliding glass door" to you non-metro Detroiters) and and rang it once against his nose as I let him out. He had it mastered the next time he wanted out. No joke. It only took once to show him this trick! I've had to raise the height of the bell almost as frequently as we've had to adjust his collars because he grows so quickly.

Here's Newton catching a scent outside in the snow. The white flakes are snow falling. He loves being outside and we have a hard time keeping him in when there's snow on the ground. He is a winter loving dog for sure!

Happy Birthday!

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Wed, 27 Feb 2013 22:06:00 +0000

My oldest and youngest share a February birthday, which is nice because it means ONE PARTY for 2 kids. It's a drag for Brett, who is still young enough to whine about the fact that his brothers have birthdays right after Christmas and he has to wait "soooo long" for his. Whatevs.

Brett's birthday is in May. Like that's a long time away or something.

Anyway, we are now the parents of a 15 year old and a 5 year old. Come May, they will be 15, 10, and 5 which is awesome for me because I like numbers that are divisible by 5. I'm just strange that way.

Here's Bryce:

Brendan (that's pretty much a smile when you're 15)

Here's some pre-blowing out candle silliness:

Here they are blowing out their candles:

Happy birthday, boys!!!

Better Early Than Never, Right?

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sat, 02 Feb 2013 18:03:00 +0000

The worst weather forecaster in the USA has predicted an early spring. (it's Groundhog Day, folks.)

I, for one, do not understand WHY weather predictions from a rodent are important. Ok, they're not important, but sheesh, why the heck does this tradition persist?

Considering I want to be rid of the furry little varmints via some Looney Tunes-style ACME dynamite, I certainly don't take heed to what he "predicts."

Those root-eating, lawn-destroying, ankle-rolling critters make my life miserable. Oh-the ankle rolling? Yeah. Well, when they dig their lovely tunnels through your freshly mulched flower beds, and you step on one of those tunnels, the earth gives way and if you're me, that means you roll your ankle. Not very gracefully.

So, anyway, how did I celebrate Phil's prediction of an early Spring? By getting in the mood.

THE GARDENING MOOD, people.

I strolled through Pinterest for some garden inspiration and found a few things:

Source: hgtv.com via Dorothy on Pinterest

Source: houzz.com via Dorothy on Pinterest

Source: iheartearlgrey.tumblr.com via Dorothy on Pinterest

Bring on Spring!!!

Stuff My Dog Eats.

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sun, 13 Jan 2013 13:08:00 +0000

It was unseasonably warm here, reaching 60 degrees yesterday. Crazy for January in Hockeytown! But a perfect day to send Brendan outside to clean up Newton's, ah, piles. You know what I'm talking about--the stuff dogs leave behind.

*I must warn you that I'm truly going to talk about dog piles and what we find in them*

Brendan spent the better part of an hour cleaning up piles and we learned a couple of things about Newton.

1. He hasn't managed to designate one spot to leave his piles.

2. He has managed to eat things that he shouldn't have, which leaves evidence behind in his piles.

I really wanted to call this post "Sh*t My Dog Eats," but since I've made a point of not using foul language on the blog, I nixed it. If you know me personally, you know I can drop a curse word like nobody's business, but I wanted more for my blog. Anyway, while "Sh*t My Dog Eats" won't be appearing as a title for a blog entry, I will keep a tab on the side bar for Stuff My Dog Eats.

Because everybody does want to know what my dog eats. Right?

In this entry, we feature a few colorful items:

Red
Blue
Green

Yep. He ate a red crayon, a blue crayon, and a green crayon. Newton seems to prefer primary colors but that green one must've just lept into his mouth. It would appear that crayons make it safely through a dog's digestive tract, ending up in piles in the same bits and chunks that they went into his mouth.

A lime green sticky hand toy. What is a sticky hand toy? It's one of the silly party favor-type toys that parents feel obligated to put in party favor bags. It stretches and sticks to stuff, which evidently is fun to play with if you're 4. This item, thankfully, went through whole. It really could've caused a lot of problems, but as Brendan pointed out, it's made of lots of nasty petro-chemicals, so it probably just slid on through the dog.

Ugh. I'm really glad that's all we found. We will be more careful with crayons as they seem to be some sort of Newfoundland Dog treat.

Finishing Out 2012

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sat, 05 Jan 2013 22:31:00 +0000

I have been quite absent from the blog the past few weeks, mostly because of this little guy:

That's Newton, our new Newfoundland Dog. Isn't he just so cute?! He has taken up my "free" time over the past several weeks as in addition to being the head chef and chief bottle washer, I am also the resident dog trainer.

We managed to get the boys to see Santa at our favorite little store (Dixboro General Store.) They even have live reindeer with Santa! I'm mostly impressed that my nearly 15 year old son will sit with Santa and play along for his younger brothers. It's very sweet.

The kids were in the annual Christmas Pageant at our church. Here's Brett, dressed as a chicken (yes, a chicken-it was a story of the birth of Jesus from the animal's point of view!)

I also went to Cub Scout Winter Camp with my favorite Webelos scout, Brett. Camp is held at D-Bar-A Scout Ranch, about 90 minutes north of us, and it was a fun weekend. We went with my co-leader and her 2 boys and even managed a "private" room for the 5 of us in our cabin.

We made the traditional stop at the windmill on our way out of camp. My (step) grandparents donated that windmill and lots of other things (and a lot of TIME) to Scouting and to D-Bar-A.

Christmas was lovely for our family. Brad took off quite a bit of time, so he was home when the kids were on school vacation. Here's them on Christmas morning:

Brad & I bought the kids a Wii U for Christmas. I have to say, we've really enjoyed playing it as a family!!

And that "little" Newfoundland pup of ours just keeps growing! This is his front paw and my hand. I should note that I really have freakishly large hands. Newton is just 10 wks old in this photo.

And because he's gorgeous, and because I got a new D-SLR camera (thanks, honey!), here's some more shots of Newton:

Newton, 9 weeks old

Newton, 10 weeks old

Merry Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Tue, 25 Dec 2012 20:47:00 +0000

May the blessings of the season be with you and yours!

God's Peace to all from Life With Boys!

Meet Newton, the Newfoundland!

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sat, 22 Dec 2012 13:51:00 +0000

We've brought a new family member home...he's a BOY, of course, and his name's Newton. Like Sir Isaac Newton. Newton the Newf. He's just a baby, barely 7 weeks old when we brought him home from the breeder.

Our previous Newfoundland, Toby, was a rescue. We got him at about 1 year of age and he was a wonderful dog, a great companion, and was loved by everyone who met him. Rescue was very positive for us, but missing that first year meant that our Toby who only lived to age 9, spent just 8 years with us. Newfs are a giant breed, so their life expectancy is anywhere from 8-12 years. 12 is VERY lucky. Our Toby had terrible degenerative arthritis in his spine and we had to say goodbye to him at age 9 when he could no longer walk. We tried a rescue St. Bernard last winter, but while he was a lovely dog, he was NOT safe around our children. Call that a "bad placement," but it put a bitter taste in our mouth for rescue. At least at this stage of our lives.

We also decided that after the loss of Brad's parents this summer, a sweet little puppy was a great idea. Something to love, something that would love us all back, something to do together as a family project, something to distract us all from the sadness we feel. Yes, yes, I know--the sweet little puppy will grow into a ginormous dog that drools, sheds, digs--but we're game!

So we researched breeders, selected one, checked her references (which were great!), and brought home Newton. At not quite 7 weeks old. Which is too young, I agree. I won't be writing any glowing reviews for this breeder, but I will say our little Newton was well cared for, the dogs in the breeders care were well-cared for, and Newton is just a little doll.

He is sleeping through the night, has learned to sit to get a treat, and comes when called (most of the time!). He also has a fascination with shoes.

Bryce is REALLY enjoying playing with him!

He has gained over 5 pounds since we brought him home two weeks ago and is starting to escape his very expensive and elaborate containment system:

Yeah, I know. Rubbermaid tubs aren't exactly the best containment system-but they worked for 2 weeks! Now we'll just get out bigger ones, hee hee. In the above photo, he's crying for me to rescue him. Big baby!

Now my gardener readers are probably thinking, "what about your garden?! Won't a ginormous dog ruin it?" Well, yes. He probably will ruin my garden until I can get him trained to leave it alone. Most of my perennial beds were around when we had Toby and he learned to just leave them alone. I love the dog more than I love my plants (anyone believe that? lol) and I'm sure Newton will get into trouble with my plants come Spring, but my kids have trashed my plants before and they're still here....

Welcome to the family, Newton!

Book Review

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 15:07:00 +0000

168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think by Laura Vanderkam
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The basic premise of this book is that we are all given the same 168 hours each week and it's up to us to figure out how to prioritize our activities in those hours to get the most from them.

The author has the reader chart exactly how you spend your day-from sleep to making lunch, to playing on Facebook, and then has you sit back and analyze what you find. She suggests that we each have "core competencies" and that we shouldn't waste our time doing things we don't love to do or aren't talented at doing. One caveat: the author has the means to hire out those things, which many readers will not. She talks about paying someone to shop with her, paying someone to do laundry, to cook, to clean, to do the lawncare.... This is just not reasonable for many folks.

That said, the takeaway for me was the jotting down of my week and totaling up how much time I spend on various things. It made me evaluate how I spend my days and make them more productive and less stressful.

View all my reviews

Book Review

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sat, 01 Dec 2012 20:37:00 +0000

Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids by Lisa M. Ross
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This book was the motivation for me to clear out the kids' toys and purge them to a more manageable level. While this book is not really full of new ideas, it is a good list of things to consider to make parenting a simpler and more enjoyable experience. I found that this book really supports the idea that less is more when it comes to material things and more is more when it comes to time spent with your children.

View all my reviews

Quotable Kids

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Wed, 28 Nov 2012 15:17:00 +0000

Bryce has been getting in the habit lately of climbing into our bed in the middle of the night. Sometimes, it's because he's gotten up to use the bathroom. Sometimes, he gets cold. Sometimes, he just wants to.

We've been encouraging him to sleep on our floor, in a sleeping bag. It was sorta working.

Then we decided to ~~bribe~~ behavior mod him. We told him that if he stayed in his bed ALL NIGHT for 3 nights in a row, we'd buy him "fry fries" (french fries). Fries are a huge treat for him. We had success! Then, we let the treat part go and for about a week, he stayed in bed at night all on his own. Over the holiday weekend, he was climbing in bed with us by 6:30 or so, which was tolerable because that's his normal wake up time. But he stayed in bed otherwise.

Until this morning. Brad had a talk with him last night about remembering to stay in his own bed, and if he did it 3 nights in a row, he'd get fries.

5:29AM today. I hear little feet run into our room and Bryce stands next to me and says, "Mom, I don't want fry fries." And he climbed into our bed!! sigh.

Quotable Kids

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sun, 25 Nov 2012 14:03:00 +0000

It was 60 degrees here in Hockeytown on Thanksgiving.

Unseasonably warm. Truly something to give thanks!

The bottom fell out of the mercury yesterday and the reality that Winter is coming hit hard today. We have a nice dusting of snow and flurries falling. It's really quite pretty.

Bryce came downstairs and hollered, "What happened?"

I thought he was referring to the pile of bins in the kitchen that represents all of our Christmas decor. I told him we were putting up the tree today.

He said, "Not that--the snow!!"

and he ran to the window....and wait for it...

"I didn't even hear it snowing last night!!"

gotta love kids.

Creating A Minimalist Lifestyle Toys Part 2

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Fri, 09 Nov 2012 23:21:00 +0000

I took a drastic step today and packed up the kids' toys today. See that photo below?

That's the kids' toys. Plus some empty storage pieces which you can't really see (there's an empty bookcase, an empty Trofast frame, an empty Lego table and an empty workbench in there.

Now, before you get all judgemental at me for "having so many toys" blah blah blah, let me remind you that I have 3 children who are each 5 years apart. They are 14, 9, and 4. That means we have big trucks for my 4 year old, legos for my 9 year old and Nerf guns for my teenager. My children have grandparents who like to buy them nice things and I have a talent for finding things for free or cheap.

Some items are enjoyed by all 3 of my kids. They will all play with the 4 year old's Duplo Legos, they will all 3 play with the regular Legos. The Thomas trains are still enjoyed by my 9 year old and 4 year old, and we have indoor riding toys that all three kids use.

We just have to eliminate a few categories of toys. Or narrow them down. Or get rid of them. Or something.

Anyway, I boxed everything up yesterday and when they came home from school, I expected some drama.

there was no drama. none.

I thought that my 9 year old and 4 year old would cry or have a fit or something---but they didn't. Was I a bit disappointed? Maybe a little. I packed up the toys for it's sheer shock value AND so I could really clean in there. That they didn't react says that they probably knew something like this was coming.

So, after I showed Brett & Bryce the boxes, told them that EVERYTHING was in there (including the Wii), and told them that I haven't quite decided what the next step it, they went and read books in their room. Then they went outside and played with the neighbors.

They found something else to do! My friend C told me that it only proves they don't need so many things.

She's right.

I'll keep you posted as I figure out what to keep and what to eliminate.

Creating a Minimalist Lifestyle: TOYS

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sat, 03 Nov 2012 13:32:00 +0000

American kids are spoiled & have too many toys. Mine included. It's partly my fault-I like toys. I don't think that I'm compensating for something in my childhood; I had toys, I had books, I had a skateboard, I had balls and mitts and ice skates and board games. I even had Fashion Plates! I don't really recall feeling deprived. We had neighborhood kids to play with and a park AND an ice arena at the end of our street. But fast forward out of the '70s, and I have to ask myself, "Why do my kids have so many toys?" I like finding great toys for them at rummage sales and garage sales, the grandparents buy them a lot of nice things for birthdays and Christmas, and with having 3 boys spaced 5 years apart-EACH-it means that we store away age appropriate toys in the basement. Justify much, don't I?

{stuff purchased from church rummage sale in 2010--the only thing we still currently own is the Sonic figure}

My boys have too many toys. Plain and simple.

{photo from July 2011, when we were TRYING to clean out for a yard sale. sigh.}

Brad & I have been battling with the kids and their toys for a lot of years now. We've tried various solutions like keeping only books in their rooms and then toys in the playroom. The toys always end up spilling out of the very nice-sized playroom! The toys end up in the kitchen, in the dining room, and even in our bedroom. We then go and spend 2 hours "cleaning" the playroom (really, we're just "un-tornadoing" it, and yes, that's a word I just made up). What happens? About 1 week later, the toys are spilling out of the playroom and into every crevice in the house.

{photo of playroom in 20010}

I guess the problem is that yes, kids can have too many toys. How many toys is too many? I think if the toys are causing you stress in your household because the toys are everywhere and they never seem to stay neat or if you're tired of stepping on Legos in your bare feet (and I live with boys, so guess how many Legos we have?!), then you have too many toys. If your kids are just dumping the toys they have and not really investing any time with them, you have too many toys. If the kids stand in the middle of a room which is littered with toys and they claim they have nothing to do? Yep. They have too many toys.

{photo of playroom, Septemeber 2012}

You know the thing where you buy something for a 1 or 2 year old and all they want is the box it came in? Yeah. Big kids are like that, too. We spend so much time and money and energy trying to give them the right toy or the latest toy that we forget that they can just play with some boxes and a roll of masking tape--and spend all afternoon doing it.

So I'm setting out on a mission to minimize our toys. While I've promised Brad that throughout this journey towards minimalism I wouldn't touch his things, I made no such promise to the kids. They have shown me time and time again that they have too many toys because they are always strewn all over the floor. Time for a toy-intervention!

Real Mess.

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Fri, 02 Nov 2012 10:00:00 +0000

From the files of "keeping it real," I present to you The After-School Explosion, as created by my 3 boys.

So, here's the deal. The kids come home and pretty much drop their stuff wherever it may land. They do this quickly, such that they may then head to the kitchen to consume anything in sight. After some ~~nagging~~ reminding, they ~~joyfully~~ ~~gleefully~~ begrudgingly (I'm keeping it real, after all) empty their lunchboxes which typically does not include actually putting the lunchbox away.

I think what they do next is some sort of spin move, whereupon they chuck their stuff to and fro, hoping it hits the closet. When it doesn't hit the closest, they leave it in place, hoping it will levitate itself into the closet.

Next, my oldest grabs his computer and disappears up to his room to do ~~homework~~ chat on google+, my middle boy & youngest boy grab coats and run outside to play with the neighbors. The wake of debris that remains will stay just like in the photo for days. DAYS. Seriously. Unless I pitch a fit and use some sort of guilt trip on them, the after school explosion will still look like this in the morning.

Sigh. Life With Boys.

31 Days to a Minimalist Lifestyle Day 31

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Thu, 01 Nov 2012 19:38:00 +0000

I am writing every day in October--taking on the challenge set forth by The Nester for bloggers to write a "31 Days to..." blog series. I'm tackling Minimalist Living and you can click here to read Day 30's post

I'm so glad I decided to do a 31 day challenge. It's been GREAT to clean things out around here!

Things that I have learned:

1. I don't need so much stuff.

2. Less stuff makes me less stressed.

3. I am not my stuff.

It sounds simple, but it's all truth. I don't need so much stuff. Is it nice to have stuff? Sure. It's nice to have stuff. But then you have to deal with the stuff. Find a place to store the stuff. Clean the stuff. Put the stuff back. Holler at the kids for touching the stuff. You get the idea.

I don't need so much stuff!

Getting rid of stuff makes me less stressed. Why? Well-less stuff means less stuff to deal with. Less stuff to store. Less stuff to clean. Less stuff to put away. Less stuff for the kids to destroy.

Less stuff makes me less stressed!!

*I* am not my stuff. I am not the things that I've been saving in the basement. I am not the trinkets that I've saved from my kids' babyhood. If my kids were to go through my stuff, would they see "me?" OR--would they see a bunch of stuff that has no meaning to them?

I am not my stuff.

I am me.

I have so much more to do to achieve a more minimalist lifestyle that I've decided to make it a regular feature here on the blog.

Day 1 email

Day 2 magazines

Day 3 kitchen tools

Day 4 junk drawer

Day 5 bathroom counter

Day 6 first aid & medicines

Day 7 kitchen sink

Day 8 plastic containers

Day 10 spices

Day 11 mail

Day 12 linen closet part 1

Day 13 linen closet part 2

Day 14 donate!!!

Day 15 outdoor spaces

Day 16 bakeware

Day 17 pantry

Day 18 laundry

Day 19 office

Day 20 dresser

Day 21 closet

Day 22 sentimental items

Day 23 sentimental items/scrapbook room

Day 24 scrapbook room

Day 25 files

Day 27 more kitchen cabinets

Day 28 WHY be minimalist?

Day 29 drinkware

Day 30 dining room

Happy Halloween!

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 22:05:00 +0000

Happy Halloween from my trick or treaters! Brendan is a Yip Yip (from classic Sesame Street!), Brett is an M & M (umm, duh!) and Bryce is a "construction guy." His costume came straight outta the dress-up box!! Gotta love that!

A special shout out to the blog that helped me figure out how to make a Yip Yip costume for Brendan--
Twin Dragonfly Designs. I had to modify it to fit my 6' son...and I had to modify it again so he could PLAY A TRUMPET while wearing it. (umm, I cut arm slits and a mouth slit! I'm crafty that way!) Check it out in action.

Brendan is the blue Yip Yip. In case you didn't already know.

Happy Halloween!!

31 Days to a Minimalist Lifestyle Day 30

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Tue, 30 Oct 2012 10:00:00 +0000

I am writing every day in October--taking on the challenge set forth by The Nester for bloggers to write a "31 Days to..." blog series. I'm tackling Minimalist Living and you can click here to read Day 29's post

Our first floor is open concept. The living room opens into the dining room which opens into the kitchen. This space is really the heart of our home & is where we do the majority of our living. It takes a lot of abuse.

As dining rooms go, ours is pretty basic. Table. Chairs. Barrister bookcase in lieu of a china cabinet. My Grampa bought me this barrister bookcase when I went to college :)

The corner cabinet was something I found several years ago. Not a lot of stuff in it, really, but I've been thinking that the corner cabinet is a bit redundant and needs to go.

In the corner cabinet, I was keeping stuff like kids' art & awards (already moved those to our awards wall upstairs), tchotchkes (knick knacks), photos. The space on the bottom is where my teenager stores his laptop. He'll have to find a new spot. Probably in that old chest of drawers you see in the photo. He has already claimed the top drawer-maybe I can clear out another drawer to give him more room.

Once again, I emptied the 2 cabinets and made quick decisions as to what stays and what goes. I already had the boys go through their artwork (pottery stuff) that they wanted to keep. I was surprised at what they chose as it definitely is not what I would've selected. GOOD. This way, the BOYS keep what's meaningful to THEM and not me. It is *their* stuff after all.

Below is the "donate" pile:

nope. We just don't use candlestick holders. Even lead crystal ones. Are they pretty? Yep. But we don't use them, so out they go!

I'm left with a corner cabinet to re-home via Craigslist:

And a barrister book case that I need to purge a little bit more:

Day 1 email

Day 2 magazines

Day 3 kitchen tools

Day 15 outdoor spaces

Day 16 bakeware

Day 17 pantry

Day 18 laundry

Day 19 office

Day 20 dresser

Day 21 closet

Day 22 sentimental items

Day 23 sentimental items/scrapbook room

Day 24 scrapbook room

Day 25 files

Day 27 more kitchen cabinets

Day 28 WHY be minimalist?

Day 29 drinkware

31 Days to a Minimalist Lifestyle Day 29

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Mon, 29 Oct 2012 14:54:00 +0000

Ok, another day, another kitchen cabinet. This time, I'm attacking the cabinet that holds our glasses and medicines. Glasses and cups seem to multiply around here like solo socks in the dryer. I've been purging from this cabinet over the years, tossing those big plastic cups like you get at a sports stadium and the junkier plastic cups in general.

It's not too bad, but honestly, how many glasses does a family of 5 need?

We definitely DO NOT NEED that many. I didn't bother to count, but jeez, that's a lot of drinkware. Why did we ever buy plastic cups for parties, anyway? We had enough that everyone could've had a REAL glass.

After emptying the cabinet, I wiped everything down, sorted the glasses into keep/donate, and adjusted the height of one of the shelves.

Here's the pile of stuff to donate or dump:

Believe me, once the owners of the EIGHT glass handled root beer float mugs are home, I'm cutting those back too.

I also grouped the medicines into two small drawer organizers and put my coffee filters in a basket. I moved all the glasses down to the bottom shelf, the meds all to the next higher shelf, and my coffee up on the third shelf.

Looks a lot better and it makes more sense, too. Having the glasses lower means my 9 year old can access them more easily. I'm tall, so reaching to that 3rd shelf for my coffee isn't a problem. Even in a non-caffeinated state of mind I can find it! ha ha Believe me, I'd like to purge even MORE from this cabinet, but I have to go slowly lest I upset the boys who live here.

Tackle your glasses today. Do you REALLY need 47 cups for a family of 4? Or even a family of 10?

Day 1 email

Day 2 magazines

Day 3 kitchen tools

Day 15 outdoor spaces

Day 16 bakeware

Day 17 pantry

Day 18 laundry

Day 19 office

Day 20 dresser

Day 21 closet

Day 22 sentimental items

Day 23 sentimental items/scrapbook room

Day 24 scrapbook room

Day 25 files

Day 27 more kitchen cabinets

Day 28 WHY be minimalist?

31 Days to a Minimalist Lifestyle Day 28

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Mon, 29 Oct 2012 13:12:00 +0000

I am writing every day in October--taking on the challenge set forth by The Nester for bloggers to write a "31 Days to..." blog series. I'm tackling Minimalist Living and you can click here to read Day 27's post

I've been asked by some of my "real life" friends & acquaintances the reason behind attempting to thin out our belongs and adapt a more minimalist lifestyle. I have written about some of my initial attempts at "trimming the excess" here on the blog before.

In January 2011, I talked about being tired of having too much "crap" everywhere and wanting to "decrapify" my home.

I participated in a friends' garage sale in the summer of 2011, and I amazingly got rid of many "sentimental" items, including some of my kids baby toys. (baby steps, people, baby steps.)

After the garage sale, the kids and I cleaned out the playroom (again!) and discovered that when it's clean and tidy, they actually PLAY in it.

I spent several months reading what seemed like every.single.book.ever.written about organizing, and motivated myself to clean out the corner cabinet in my kitchen. (October 2011) Which still, to this day, has no lazy susan.

I then had an organizational epiphany of sorts. I realized in late October 2011, that if I organized my home and cleared away the excess, I'd create a space which welcomed PEOPLE and not stuff. This is my most viewed post---it's been viewed 3,777 times!!!! I have to say that everything I wrote in there is TRUTH. As I have less stuff kicking around, it really makes for less to maintain which in turn, gifts me with more time to do other things. Like ~~scrapbook~~ play with the kids.

I think the final event that really kicked me into high gear to want to have less STUFF hanging around was the loss of Brad's parents this summer. Please understand-his folks were by NO MEANS hoarders. Or messy. They had a lovely, large home and had spent a lifetime collecting things. Things that Brad, his sister, their spouses and various family members had to spend a LOT of time going through trying to determine if there was some kind of meaning behind each "thing". Did this lace hanky belong to Grandma H or was it made by Auntie K? Whose baby blanket was this? Brad's, because it's blue? This old clock--what's the deal with it?

I am not criticizing his parents. Because of their sudden death (they were killed by storms that knocked down trees on their cottage), we were left standing dazed and confused and had to go through their things, looking for meaning or sentimental value.

Because there was so.much.stuff--enough that truly, Brad & his sister could EACH stuff their homes to the GILLS with all their parents' stuff, we had to start parting with things. We had to look for the handmade things (Brad's mom was a very talented quilter, crafter, seamstress and Brad's Dad did AMAZING wood work). The things his folks had touched--personally--were the things we wanted.

Not all the other crap. You know, the crap we all keep because "someday when I die, my kids might want it" kind of crap. We wanted photos. Things they'd made. Things we remembered them using at holidays or special events. Things the kids would find meaning in-that toy shopping cart that DROVE US NUTS--or the chess set that both my older boys remember their Grandpa playing with them & cheating. (again-this in not an insult. Brad's dad ALWAYS cheated when he played games with the kids. It's one of our funny memories of him.)

But all the other "stuff"? The holiday decor, the books, the baby items Brad's mom saved? Yeah. We didn't want it.

Eye-opening to say the least.

I have been keeping things that have "value" to me because I think my children will find value in them some day.

WHY would I put that kind of pressure on my kids? Why would I make them have to sort through MY lifetime of possessions, trying to decided if this or that should be saved or be donated. My STUFF is not a record of who I am today, and honestly, it really isn't a "record" of who I was 20 years ago.

It's just stuff.

Day 1 email

Day 2 magazines

Day 3 kitchen tools

Day 15 outdoor spaces

Day 16 bakeware

Day 17 pantry

Day 18 laundry

Day 19 office

Day 20 dresser

Day 21 closet

Day 22 sentimental items

Day 23 sentimental items/scrapbook room

Day 24 scrapbook room

Day 25 files

Day 27 more kitchen cabinets

Day 28 WHY be minimalist?

Linked to Delightful Order

Linked to A Bowl Full of Lemons

31 Days to a Minimalist Lifestyle Day 27

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Sat, 27 Oct 2012 16:29:00 +0000

Believe it or not, I still have more cabinets in my kitchen to go through. We are truly blessed to have such a lovely & large kitchen! It's main drawback, however, is that having so much storage means so much stuff accumulates.

I had been putting off dealing with the cabinet over the fridge as well as the cabinet under the junk drawers. Like many of you, the cabinet over the fridge is for stuff we don't typically use on a regular basis. Plus the electric can opener. It's the red item on the bottom left of the cabinet.

Can openers, especially heavy electric ones, are best stored above your reach, right? NOT!

I digress. Here's the other cabinet. It holds my china, the kids' art stuff and a couple of kitchen appliances. This is a picture I took when I realized I started emptying the cabinet without taking a before shot. Shame on me!

After emptying both cabinets I came up with a nice size pile for trash, another nice size pile for recycling (from the craft stuff) and nice pile of stuff to donate.

That rack thingie would be the rack that goes to our microwave so you can nuke two items at once. We've had this particular microwave for about 12 years and have NEVER ONCE used that rack!!! TIME TO GO!!! The two serving pieces are redundant since I have other large bowls and platters and that little mini-chopper is so rarely used, it seems silly to keep it. I can just use my large food processor instead.

I moved the china and some of my Christmas dishes to the cabinet above the fridge. Look-I'm a minimalist at heart, but I *LOVE* dishes. It's a sickness. I admit it. Don't try to talk me out of my dishes. I HEART them.

Here's the kids art cabinet. Sorted, cleaned out, but not thinned out as much as I'd like. There are more art supplies in the play room, so before I do a major purge I want to get everything together in one space.

I only have 1 kitchen cabinet left to go!!! After dealing with more sentimental items, purging a kitchen cabinet or two is a breeze!

Day 1 email

Day 2 magazines

Day 3 kitchen tools

Day 15 outdoor spaces

Day 16 bakeware

Day 17 pantry

Day 18 laundry

Day 19 office

Day 20 dresser

Day 21 closet

Day 22 sentimental items

Day 23 sentimental items/scrapbook room

Day 24 scrapbook room

Day 25 files

Day 26 more kitchen cabinets

31 Days to a Minimalist Lifestyle Day 25

noreply@blogger.com (Dorothy-Life With Boys) — Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:55:00 +0000

I am writing every day in October--taking on the challenge set forth by The Nester for bloggers to write a "31 Days to..." blog series. I'm tackling Minimalist Living and you can click here to read Day 24's post.

I felt so great purging all the papers and trinkets I'd been ~~collecting~~ hoarding in my scrapbook space that I decided to keep on that track. I have folder in my office filing cabinet for each of the kids' accrued paperwork from school. I save notes and schedules and papers and things with the intent of going through it at the end of the school year and then putting some of it in their school scrapbook and dumping the rest.

Intent--that is the key word here.

I have not gone through this paperwork in 2 years. It just keeps building and building in my file cabinet. I leave it there because I know it's a good spot for it, but honestly, with hanging file folders that are 2" or more thick, it's time to clean it out.

It's a mess just WAITING to be purged, right?

I started by pulling everything out and going through each file folder. I had a lot of stuff hiding in the bottom of the filing cabinet that needed re-homing, too. Like this Lego guy.

Piles waiting to be sorted:

I had a large pile of "shred" and a smallish pile of "deal with in the kids' scrapbooks."

I made a list of the files to be created and then put the remaining paperwork back in the filing cabinet:

Why yes, yes that IS the bottom of the filing cabinet. It holds no Legos or extra papers or ANYTHING! The kids' files and my files are thinned out and waiting to be filled back up with this year's papers. However, I will do a better job at PURGING them when school is done this year. That I didn't purge them for TWO years is a little ridiculous.

Purge some files today! Maybe just tackle one drawer in a filing cabinet or maybe just purge a few files.

Day 1 email

Day 2 magazines

Day 3 kitchen tools

Day 15 outdoor spaces

Day 16 bakeware

Day 17 pantry

Day 18 laundry

Day 19 office

Day 20 dresser

Day 21 closet

Day 22 sentimental items

Day 23 sentimental items/scrapbook room

Day 24 scrapbook room