mamazilla

moar reversible bags! :)

2013-05-16T09:31:00.002-05:00

recently, we dedicated a week of school to give thanks to the teachers who truly go above and beyond... i modified the reversible bag pattern i usually use by shortening it a little and adding a pleat in the middle... i kinda dig it:

this was my pattern test. i loved it so much, i kept it. (four.eyed.deer.)

this one was made for a teacher who is also a whovian. we picked out the fabrics for the similar tardis console room geometrics and the space whale episode.

the art teacher at school is an accomplished mosaic artist - a common icon/inspiration she uses is the sugar skull.

this bag was for porkchop's teacher. i really liked the doodles in the grey fabric which remind me of his love of doodling...

this bag was for paloma's teacher who was wearing a similar color combo and whose fave color is green.

lastly, i wanted to update you on the status of the Colette Laurel contest. sadly, i didn't make it into the readers' choice round, but i had some stiff competition. please check out the finalists and vote for 5 of your faves here!

thanks for coming by and reading!

Colette Patterns - Laurel Dress

2013-04-27T15:43:00.000-05:00

so i've been a little busy sewing bee lately... :)

i decided a while ago to enter the colette patterns' laurel sewing contest. but i was having trouble deciding how i wanted to alter the pattern and what fabrics i wanted.

i ended up altering the pattern by simply 1) making the yoke, 2) the horizontal band under the yoke, 3) the vertical print stripe down center front, 4) the solid band at the front hem and lastly, 5) facings for the front and back. i also made my own bias tape for the arm openings. (i love making my own bias tape. whee!)

i also decided on these three fabrics:

michael miller malibu stripe
riley blake ombre green - sadly you can't tell from the pics that the green fabric is ombre. but it is! and it's really cool looking!
michael miller coral cotton couture solid

i was really inspired by all the color blocked dresses i've seen on the runways. i was curious if i could emulate something similar myself.... i have to admit, during the process, i was really second guessing what this dress might become, but i'm really happy with it.

i'd really like to try altering the pattern again with more asymetrical blocks of color... and with different prints/colors.

this really was an easy and fun pattern/dress - even with all of my alterations - to make.

ennyhoo... thanks for coming by and reading! please forgive me for the brief post... i spent most of the day at C2E2 yesterday and then some drinkin and dancing in the evening... and i'm plum tuckered out. if you have any questions about the dress, please leave them in the comments! :)

Wish you were here!

2013-04-03T15:37:00.000-05:00

Greetings from Hilton Head Island, SC!

Greetings from Tennessee!

2013-03-30T09:49:00.001-05:00

At the local Tar-zhay. C'mon Chicago, show the local schools some love! :)

collaboration

2013-03-25T12:08:00.004-05:00

lately, i've noticed a lot of collabrations... mentions of artists inspired by/collaborating with other artists... finished products or completed works by two or more collaborating artists, bloggers collaborating on other blogs, etc...

i was just thinking how funny it is that so many creative people i know are really introverted and yet have no trouble/little trouble opening up to collaborate with other creative people.... or maybe some of us do... (?) i dunno... i swear we are the most confusing people evar. :)

i recently started working at a local fabric store and with fellow columbia alum, jen beeman. if you haven't visited her blog yet - go. now.

jen is really funny and fun to work with and i look forward to picking her multifaceted brain about possibly developing some downloadable patterns of my own in the future...

lastly, the dance weekend that i am DYING (DYYYYYING!!!!) to go to someday happened over the weekend... it's where WCS dancers can meet up with Lindyhop dancers... it's amazeballs. i especially love the crossover dances, even funnier this year, the WCS dancers dressed up in vintage inspired gear and the lindyhoppers are dressed in modern day wear:

ennyhoo... although i'm juggling a couple of new projects in the air - figgy's sunki pattern for paloma, a bowling shirt for porkchop and possibly throwing my hat into the collette patterns laurel sewing contest... i'll be leaving later this week on a spring break road trip from chicago to hilton head, sc - passing thru nashville, tn and savannah, ga...

hope this short post finds you well and warm! (it's 36 here!)

thanks for coming by and reading... :)

read: the handmade marketplace: how to sell your crafts locally, globally and online

2013-03-20T11:14:00.000-05:00

The Handmade Marketplace: How To Sell Your Crafts Locally, Globally, And Online by Kari Chapin
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

if you (like me) have ever considered getting serious about selling your garments or projects/crafts, this is the book for you....

it's written for crafters by crafters - easy to follow, understand, relate to and best of all very very encouraging...

the author and her panel of crafters cover everything from very basic business tips, marketing and branding including using social/online as well as print media, and selling - either online, in a store or a craft fair or all of the above...

i especially appreciate all of the tips and recalled experiences from the various crafters and creators... it's reassuring to know that these very successful people were once in your (my) unsure shoes. it's very thought provoking too - re: online sales and craft fairs... i really didn't put much deep thought into anything outside of pricing and selling (which scares me to death). the book made me consider a reasonable return policy as well as the methods of payment i should accept.

admittedly, i skipped the portion about podcasting because i doubt i'd ever use that as a marketing tool... additionally, i was a little lost during the press kit portion of the book as well... again, another tool i don't think i would use...

i absolutely LOVED this book and am so thankful to the author, kari chapin, for writing it!! since reading the book, i feel more confident about trying to sell my own garments online and at craft fairs...

thanks so much for coming by and reading... :)

View all my reviews

p.s. our youngest cat, rascal says this book just put him to sleep.... (owner note: everything puts rascal to sleep except between the hours of 3am - 6am)

godspeed...

2013-03-18T09:19:00.000-05:00

i received an email from our school that a father of two students (a 3rd grader and a kindergartner) passed away over the weekend...

i didn't know the dad personally, i knew who he was and that he was a very jovial, friendly and popular dad amongst our mutual friends/parents....

despite not knowing him, i'm so sad to hear the news... i can 't even imagine the kind of grief they must be experiencing... i pray for him, his wife and their children, family and friends... i pray that God helps them in their sorrow... sheltering and embracing them through the stormy and weary days ahead...

i just learned that the dad was also very connected to the chicago music scene as a musician for a very popular local band and as a manager of many bands - local and elsewhere... he wrote the song below about his life and his children, it's performed by the band, kaiser cartel...

please join me and leave a light on for this family tonight...

Learn how to make a free Electronic Press Kit

revolutions & friday dance

2013-03-15T20:41:00.000-05:00

yowza... it's been a whirlwind couple of weeks....

the first week of march, we celebrated paloma's 10 revolutions around the sun (and shortly thereafter, my 41 revs... ay caramba! yes, you have to say it like bart simpson...)

paloma asked for a studio ghibli/miyazaki birthday party/sleepover... she basically wanted to marathon movie watch and dance battle her friends on wii... we also planned to have a cake featuring miyazaki characters... (Haru & Baron from Cat Returns, Haku and Chihiro from Spirited Away, Howl and Sophie from Howl's Moving Castle, Totoro, Satsuki & Mei from My Neighbor Totoro)

(no, i didn't cut the cake with my rotary cutter, sassycrackers...) O_o

and paloma also kept asking if i could make her this dress from The Cat Returns.

*insert boisterous laugh track here* (although, this cosplay of Haru is OFF THE CHAIN. holla!)

eventually, we settled on me making a totoro t-shirt with a pale yellow tutu skirt inspired by that dress for her and matching skirts for her friends... *whew*

sadly, all of my grand pinning of miyazaki party ideas on pinterest (i love that that search actually yielded results! *fistbump* pinterest! ) failed, because i caught another Emperor Virus McSicklypants cold.... i finished making the shirt and skirt for paloma but i didn't get a chance to finish her friends' matching skirts... they're close though... all in all the young ladies seemed to enjoy themselves... evidence there was much rejoicing...

a few days later, i celebrated my birthday in chicago:

and then i flew out to new jersey to celebrate my bff, corey's birthday with her beautiful family:

corey also has the teensyest tinyest rice cooker i have seen.... ever... it looks like a toy!!

there were many highlights during the trip including getting lost in princeton... seriously, who knew we'd get lost on campus...

princeton is a lovely college town. i geeked out and saw einstein's house... but i was too chicken to take a picture, since it's still a residence... there was signage everywhere exclaiming "Happy Pi Day!" and "Happy Birthday Albert!" clearly, corey and i were in very good piscean company...

we had breakfast at pj's pancake house and lunch at triumph brewing and checked out a bunch of local shops... and then we caught "silver linings playbook" at the princeton garden theatre. it's a lovely theatre with a very friendly staff. and i highly recommend watching that movie... it was SOOOO GOOOD!!!!! :')

we stayed at the westin princeton at forrestal village... where they surprised us with complimentary drinks in their latitude lounge and we found this when we got to our room!

then, we capped off our birthday weekend with massages and facials... it was a short but very sweet visit... corey said she hadn't laughed as hard as she had in a very long time... best. compliment. evar!!! :)

ennyhoo... hopefully, i'll finish the remainder of the birthday skirts and i'll update this post with pics of them all together... :)

i saw these amazeballs dance videos on my birthday - so you've prolly already seen them elsewhere, but they're so great - you won't mind seeing them again... and again... :)

i love that in this video, some of the dancers are *airquotes* RETIRED *airquotes*... bwahaha....

oooo... this video just makes me wanna break out all my 80s pastels.... *doublesnaps*

thanks for coming by and reading, i hope march is treating you well, weather notwithstanding.... :)

facebook fast - update

2013-03-05T12:48:00.001-06:00

so, it's been almost three weeks since i started my facebook fast... and it's been a tough go of it... facebook may have it's warts but for me and my family and friends who now live in different time zones and continents, it really is a wonderful way to stay in touch, even if it is only through a status update... personally, i find some status updates truly intimate and genuine...

anyway, i'm glad that i've been able to keep my lenten sacrifice so far... i tell you this now, because tomorrow is my birthday and i will most likely break it... i just think if people take time to send you good wishes, the least you can do is thank them....

i have definitely noticed in the past three weeks that i'm my more observant self. i have re-opened my eyes to the world around me that was often obscured by my phone and my facebook wall...

although, i've failed thus far to write any letters, i have blogged more and have read more and am still planning on writing letters.... one of the hidden gifts of being more observant is how something mundane or coincidental will rush memories of someone and bring them to the present and the need to communicate with them becomes a priority... i've also noticed that i've struck up conversations with complete strangers more often than before. and they've been very funny and productive interactions....

not too recently, during one of our chicago snowstorms, i noticed an elderly man struggling to free his car from the middle of an unplowed intersection. eventually, after he'd managed to back up onto the street corner, i helped him to move his car and asked a couple of construction workers to help me. we released the car and the man waved weakly from his window. i bought my fellow helpers hot chocolates at the cafe. we joked a bit about the man and his mercedes and what could possibly be so important for him trek outside on a stormy day like that day.

late in the afternoon, it was still snowing... and while tromping home thru snow with the kids from school, we spied a lovely old sewing table (sans machine & retrofitted with a new top). The metal legs were in very good condition and the pedal still moved the large wheel. i couldn't let the table languish in the alley, so i started to half drag/half carry the heavy table home... which was only a half block away...

the two construction workers from the morning saw me. they came to my rescue this time, and carried the table the rest of the way home and up our front steps... i am so very thankful for and humbled by their generosity. it was a good day. i was thankful that i was present to help the man in his car and thankful i was present to see the sewing table.... :)

fwiw, these three weeks have been an excellent reminder of how absent i have been in other parts of my life... and that i should endeavor to balance my online life and my off line life... and be more present and observant in both....

chicago is currently hiding under a blanket of snow... she's quite pretty nonetheless.... i hope you are warm and safe wherever you are... thanks for coming by and reading... :)

read it: the girl who fell beneath fairyland and led the revels there

2013-03-04T16:31:00.000-06:00

The Girl Who Fell Beneath Fairyland and Led the Revels There by Catherynne M. Valente
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

i'm surprised at how lukewarm i am about this sequel to "the girl who circumnavigated fairyland in a ship of her own making" - especially since i really enjoyed the first book...

i didn't hate it. i was glad to see some familiar characters again...

however, it was odd... i wasn't nearly as compelled to read this book as i was the first... it felt like i was involved in a poorly planned scavenger hunt...

poor september seemingly goes from unresolved quest to unresolved quest with new character after new character... and is constantly unsure of herself... which seemed very out of character for her, considering the triumphant & bittersweet end of the first book...

and speaking of completely out of character - what's up with maud? clearly, she was much more interesting when she mirrored the marquess - i would have preferred her like that the entire time....

and this book was much darker than the first... and generally i like dark, one of my favorite books is gaiman's bittersweet and somberly humorous, graveyard book. but this journey was dark and sad and seemingly without redemption.... which is fine, i guess.... i was just baffled that we'd traveled this arduous journey with september for so long on a very sad road and then *poof* everything's hunky dory.... ???

i just think if you're gonna go the "empire strikes back" route... just go all the way with it... not sure why the story turned so fast at the end....

i did enjoy reading about the landscape and history of fairyland below... it is just as interesting if not more so than fairyland itself... the author is a master of describing that world and immersing/captivating the reader.

fwiw, i'm still looking forward to the next fairyland book. i hope it's better than both of it's predecessors. :)

View all my reviews

final - figgy's patterns - scirocco

2013-02-28T08:16:00.002-06:00

clearly, all of my grand (delusions) plans to document my progess on this garment have failed... since i finished the dress about a week ago... *sad trombone* i've also been really busy with work and paloma's birthday is this weekend.... lots of prep for the soon to be 10 year old's b'day party... (help.me.)

re: cutting...

i think i've mentioned before that cats do not make good pattern weights... you should believe me. (my) cats won't, but you should.... it took me about two hours to cut this out (cat notwithstanding), but only because i decided (*cough*forgot to buy lining*cough*) to have contrast panels and lining (see pink and peach fabrics)...

re: sewing...

this would probably be a challenging pattern even for an intermediate sewer, but if you just take it slow and read the directions, i think you'll find your way...

the trickiest part is definitely the bodice, where you turn the lining... again, if you follow the directions, you'll figure it out....

"16. Right sides facing, align the inner shoulder seams and stitch. Press the seam open." (then you pull the shoulder seams thru the opening at the waist and stitch the outer shoulder seams... this sounds more complicated than it is... really.)

"18. Right sides facing, place the inner and outer shoulder seams on top of each other. Pin and stitch the remaining seam opening along the armhole and neckline, which avoids topstitching."

after the bodice, the skirt is a breeze, especially if you take my advice and notch the patterns so you know which one is which.... then, TA-DA!!! *insertsnoopydance* (not optional)

so, yeah.... i always forget how tall Paloma is.... it's more of a long flouncy shirt than a dress.... but, she loves it and that's all that matters to me.... i can't wait for summer so she can actually use it.... she spent the coooold chilly day in this outfit with a sweater and long socks... she dinna wanna take it off... :)

ennyhooo..... happy thursday! thanks for coming by and reading!!

Somewhat Simple Thursday Link Party
The Shabby Creek Cottage Link Party
House of Hepworths Link Party

happy valentines day!!!

2013-02-14T09:18:00.000-06:00

hee hee!

Battle of the Bamboo 2013

2013-02-13T14:04:00.002-06:00

Just got a heads up from FAN that Battle of the Bamboo 2013 is this weekend! Sadly, I won't be able to attend and check out groups like this one from DePaul:

my jaw drops (and my feet cramp) at the 4:00 mark.... GAH! I'M SO BUMMED TO MISS IT!!!! :(

so if you're in the area, and wanna get yo' pilipino on... you should really check it out:

Battle of the Bamboo
Saturday, 2/16
5:30pm to 10 pm

UIC Forum
725 W Roosevelt Rd
Chicago IL

the facebook fast

2013-02-13T01:25:00.001-06:00

oh man....

i can't take it back, it's already out there...

so, i stumbled upon and read this very reflective post about Lent... and this quote kinda stuck:

"...Lent isn't only about giving up things. It's also about adding things, God things..."

*insertreflectiveandquizzicalpause*

then this quote is followed by a short list of examples including - "Having given up on Facebook, to whom will you devote meaningful conversation?"

which really got me thinking about the people i care about and the ways in which i choose to communicate with them and why i always choose facebook... for years and years and years, i happily wrote letters and drew and doodled with glee on envelopes... and then, i stopped... maybe i got too busy and too lazy... and then, i discovered facebook....

so, i'm giving up facebook for lent and i'm going to (try to) write to someone every day.... maybe a blog post. maybe a post card. maybe a letter. maybe a note in a lunchbox. maybe a post-it at an ATM....

please wish me luck! (and please pray for me, if you pray...) no, really! i look forward to reading status updates and browsing photos from my friends and family who are so far away.... these next 40 days are going to be very challenging... :)

wip - figgy's patterns - scirocco - pattern transfer

2013-02-11T10:14:00.002-06:00

so, here's a list of what i need to transfer patterns:

the original pattern
kraft paper
tracing wheel
clear ruler
cutting mat
hello kitty pencil (not optional)
glass of wine (optional)

not pictured:
pins/paperweight
paper scissors
hole punch
metal shower curtain ring
pattern notcher

all in all it took me about 2 hours to transfer the pattern, including:

cutting the original pattern pieces out,

ironing and transferring the original patterns to kraft paper,

drinking wine, wrassling children to take showers,

connecting the dots, revising the length if necessary, and labeling the patterns in pencil,

cutting the patterns out,

drinking wine, wrassling kids to sit in time out,

punching holes ~~in wall~~ in the pattern and hanging on a shower ring.

the original figgy's patterns are pretty self explanatory. the only added instruction i would have is to use a pattern notcher to add notches to the skirt flounce and panel pieces - top flounce (1 notch) , middle flounce (2 notches), bottom flounce (3 notchesetc...) they're similar in size and shape and once you cut them out in fabric, it may be difficult to tell them apart.

next up... cutting your newly transferred patterns out of fabric! how exciting!!!

Lindy Hop Challenge - Day 8 - Friday Dance

2013-02-08T08:00:00.000-06:00

Day 8: Your favorite instructor.

it's funny, when i first read this, i thought of this dr. who t-shirt - "you never forget your first doctor". if you're a dr. who fan, this probably rings true for you too... although i've become fond of the more recent regenerations of the doctor, especially david tennant, tom baker is still my first doctor. :)

ennyhoo, i think the same can be said of lindyhop teachers... i've said it numerous times before, but paul overton and sharon ashe are/was/always will be my favorite lindyhop instructors to learn "the basics". of course, i'm biased for sure, as paul and sharon taught me to lindyhop from day 1 (circa 1997) and started me on the long lindyhop journey i'm apparently still on... :) in addition to providing a strong dance foundation to build upon, they served as great role models for my short lived teaching career as well. i consider myself very blessed to call them my teachers as well as my friends....

swungover did a recent (well, for the very private paul & sharon anyway) interview with paul here.

it's a shame that there aren't more publicly viewable videos of paul and sharon teaching.... here's a teeny tiny short one.... paul and sharon really exemplified to me, two dancers/teachers who genuinely loved dancing, teaching and lindyhop.... they had clearly been affected and deeply moved by those three things, and had seen the affect on others.... they danced and taught effortlessly - seemingly - but were also challenged and captivated by their students and by the transitive nature of the dance and the community...

they were always encouraging and supportive teachers without being enablers. although they offered to help students to improve, if you didn't improve by the time the month long class was complete, you did not move on to the next class. it was made quite clear to us students and the rule was enforced. too often, i meet students, who are lovely, energetic, positive people, but are in dance classes or levels far above their current skills. and too often, i hear it's because "business is business".... imho - moving a student up to make room for more students is not good for the student or the dance community...

sharon and paul's passion for lindyhop was also very contagious. san francisco's lindyhop scene was very lucky to have them as they often brought in the best teachers for workshops. they also continued to take lessons and teach new choreography that they had learned or new (old) dance variations - the madison, shag, balboa, etc... paul was always listening to music and challenging all of our perceptions and paradigms about lindyhop relative to music.

i think because their vision and philosophy (and popularity) grew they left the metronome ballroom and started the 9:20 special - where they taught and also hosted a dance event. they also started the oakland swing dance festival, if i remember correctly. at one point, after i began teaching, paul also hosted a private weekend intensive workshop with steven mitchell for teachers from the west coast including - meeshi, josie say, chad kubo, ken watanabe, virginie jensen, micah jacobsen, jason christodoulou and myself. at one point, i think we all thought we should stop dancing and teaching - steven was very critical of all of us... but, then we all worked together on our weaknesses as well as our strengths... it was an elevating weekend to say the least.... they worked with local bands to perform at dance events. they collaborated with other local lindyhop groups like the ncls to host events and workshops as well...

not sure if this was deliberate or not, but clearly they began to teach and inspire outside of the framework of the physical classroom... and soon because they were so open to the positive changes that they were causing, they were open to the ripples of change that were returning to them... and improving and challenging them.... much like lindyhop - a conversation between people - an exchanging of ideas.... hey, it's no wonder to me that the first lindy exchange happened in san francisco... :)

paul and sharon were tireless teachers... in addition to teaching at their venues, they traveled to other cities, domestic and internationally to teach, etc... they choreographed or performed a few times with groups that they created, etc... they were like planets in orbit, constantly moving...

paul and sharon have moved on to other professional careers and other cities and i can only hope that they look back on those years happily and satisfied with the fruits of their labors.... i hope they return to teaching and dancing lindyhop soon. i really think the community (ok, me especially...) could use their encouraging presence, creativity, vision and guidance again... :)

happy friday!!!

wip: figgy's patterns - scirocco

2013-02-07T14:11:00.000-06:00

just a few days ago, i found ~~buried~~ myself in the figgy's patterns box at the needle shop. this scirocco pattern immediately caught my ~~old and barely working~~ eye... ;)

on my way to the register, the remnant section's menacing tentacles grabbed me, refusing to let go until i harvested enough materials to appease it... really, it's not me, it's THE REMNANT SECTION...

dun duUN DUUUUUUUN!!!

actually, no. i have an addiction to remnant bins. i need an intervention...

although, to my credit - the only remnant i picked up was this orange chevron from dear stella:

i neglected to buy any lining (cuz i was soo happy!!!) luckily, i had some remnants at home (what? no kidding!? go figure....) that would suffice...

i'll document my little journey with this pattern over the next few days... for now, if you're thinking about starting a new project, the needle shop is having a sale on patterns - Use the code "BYEPATTERNS" and get 25% off!!! GO NOW!!!

happy thursday!!!

easiest knit cowl scarf evaAAARrrrr!!!

2013-01-29T09:45:00.002-06:00

so, i haven't taken up my knitting needles in a long time and that made me curious to see what one skein projects pinners were pinning on pinterest... *tries to say it, not spray it*

the night that i happened to browse, this was the most popular pin:

i had size 13 circular needles, but not the hat sized length and i had one skein of caron brand, acrylic, 4 oz yarn and lion brand, fisherman's wool yarn, 6oz.

unlike knit and bake's directions, i cast on more than 49 stitches (my circular needles were longer). for the caron brand acrylic, i cast on 61 stitches. for the lion brand yarn, i cast on 71 instead (i was worried that this may not fit over my friend's big head...).

i really love how they turned out, and happily so did my friends who received them as gifts.

i'm very thankful to knitandbake for posting the easy instructions to this lovely project. if you just started knitting and would like to try circular needles, this is a great project! :)

really, you can do this!!!

thanks for coming by and reading! happy tuesday!

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Lindy Hop Challenge - Day 7 - Dance Friday

2013-01-18T09:00:00.000-06:00

Day 7: Something you really want to learn

I really want to learn to lead. :)

Dawn Hampton leads Virginie Jensen and Frida Segerdahl:

Rebecka and Emelie Decavita:

Laura Keat and Jo Hoffberg:

rare vintage social dance footage of women leading and following:

Laura Glaess & Jessica Yoon:

Ruby Red:

i LURVES me some ladies leading lindyhop....

*heavysigh* someday....

Happy Friday!!

Lindy Hop Challenge - Day 6 - Friday Dance

2013-01-12T23:21:00.000-06:00

Day 6: Your favorite group dance (shim sham, tranky doo big apple, etc)

shim sham. no contest. but then again, i'm (an) old (school dancer) and back in the day, the only group dance/jazz routines i learned were the shim sham, the jitterbug stroll, and the madison... in my own defense, i was limited of time and money....

via Frankie and Erin -

there is something very comforting (to me) in the knowledge that despite the language barriers, i can shim sham with groups of complete strangers, pretty much everywhere on the planet...

i would like to finally learn the big apple....

a more modern interpretation with ryan francois and remy kouakou kouame:

lastly and not so secretly - i hope that the whole swing rueda thing comes back into vogue... (ha. snort.)

i hope you had a happy friday! (posting on saturday because yesterday was just a little crayzee....)

boo boo draft, take 2.

2013-01-07T22:35:00.000-06:00

paloma & me (& porkchop, in the oven), 10/2005

a friendly word of unsolicited advice for my fellow bloggers who are clearing out their drafts folder in anticipation of some pre-spring cleaning....

i was going to delete all of my drafts without looking at them... i know, WHAT?!

thank goodness i had a change of heart... i found something i wrote in 2005:

"early in the morning, before any rational human being is normally up, even before the yappy dogs next door start to bark, paloma and i can usually be found underneath a down comforter - i try to coax her back to sleep, she gently pokes around my head whispering "mommy nose", "mommy eye", "mommy ear", "mommy hair".
well, recently, on another one of those quiet dark mornings, she gently poked my neck (see: cystic hygroma) and said, "mommy boo boo".

i knew this day would come and similar days will follow. the stolen looks will grow into questions and the questions into conversations. and eventually, she'll be disappointed and somehow i'll have to swallow all of it up for her, like all the many times i've done it before with all of my loved ones, and gradually siphon away a little bit at a time - forever - because that's what i do ...

a few years back, the thin man (pre-kid) and i were in vegas for some reason a few months after our wedding. we were newlyweds, just back from our honeymoon. we were walking down the main drag and i caught someone's eye - some random guy... and i saw it coming, like clockwork, this random guy turned into instant thoughtless jerk and yelled something insulting at me about my neck. i kept walking and in that split second said a silent prayer, hoping the thin man hadn't heard. but he had and turned right around and shoved him, almost starting a fist fight... i managed to pull him away and some random tourists got in the way of the jerk but there it was... a vacation day almost ruined by ignorant hurtful words....

how do i realistically go about teaching my child to tolerate imperfection? what is the consolation in knowing that chaos is the genuine nature of nature? or that beauty is "in the eye of the beholder"?
what possible consolation can i offer her if/and/or when she's teased at school? besides (getting another surgery that will not solve anything really...)

i'm constantly fending off the thin man's requests to meet the elementary volleyball team he coaches. i do it mostly because paloma always interrupts games by chasing after the ball in play. but, i don't want to meet them because after a day with paloma, i don't have the energy to withstand the innocent scrutiny."

to say the least i'm glad i paused to preview this post... it's been a lifetime since the paloma had so few words... (lol!)

recently, the kids have confessed to me that their classmates are very curious about me and sometimes not very nice about it. my heart aches and sometimes breaks for my kids and the regular (hopefully, not daily) teasing they endure by classmates at school.

i thought after living thru a tough childhood, i'd be prepared for a second and third one lived by my children... as a kid, i learned not to hide.... to embrace my inner and outer freak, to raise my freak flag high... ;) my mother helped by not fighting to "normalize" me for the comfort of everyone else.

but it's much tougher the second and third time around... i know childhood is tough anyway.... but it absolutely kills me that my "normal" kids get teased because of their "abnormal" mom.... a long time ago, i considered going back for more corrective surgery after i got scared by some other moms who predicted this scenario... but, i couldn't justify going under the knife again, to normalize myself for nameless faceless people i hadn't even met yet....

the kids have become very good at explaining basic science (you don't have brown hair like me, does that make you weird or just different? if you are i are different, why is one of us weird and the other isn't?) and talking to their friends about their feelings (when you talk about my mom like that, i don't like it and i don't want to talk to you right now.)

i'm so proud of them for being able to talk about it so openly and courageously. they get that from the thin man. i was never a talkative child and am not usually a talkative person. but their text is something that i know backwards and forwards, sadly... i also know how comforting it feels to whisper your worries to an open heart/mind, to give and receive unlimited and spontaneous hugs, to embrace the parts of your self that the rest of world is seemingly afraid of, and to pray and hope for friendship, tolerance and peace.

in the almost 10 years, i've been a mom, i've failed at so many events, so many times... hopefully, this is my event, the one that lands me a ribbon.... :)

(ok, besides the "i can do everything with one hand wrapped around a baby" ribbon....)

thanks for coming by and reading, i hope you had a pleasant "re-entry" monday... :)

Lindy Hop Challenge - Day 5 - Friday Dance

2013-01-04T12:43:00.000-06:00

(in an effort to re-attempt the lindyhop blog challenge, i'm going to try to start posting weekly instead of daily... & friday dance seems as good a day as any to do it...)

Day 5: Your favorite Lindy Hop variation dance (charleston, balboa, shag)

so... i'm not sure it this is a question on which variation i like to dance or like to watch.. ??

of the three, i like to dance charleston, but not solo - which i gather is more common among the purists these days... i don't actually know how to bal or shag... i'm told i fake it like i know it... sadly, i just never got around to it... and now, i don't have the money nor the time to devote to learning another dance...

and honestly, i don't often find performances of those three dances that inspire me to get up and dance... you should probably sit down for this next confession...

i really like to watch west coast swing....

ok. fine, i'll type it bigger...

i really like to watch west coast swing.

please don't hold it against me or anyone else for that matter... part of my spectatorial (is that a word?) love for WCS is that so many of my favorite leads (and follows) either came from that tradition into lindyhop or vice versa... something about both dances - the basics, the philosophies, the history, the comedy - blend well together... and speaking from experience, leads who WCS always seem to lead really well. they almost always cover the 5 C's that i look for in a lead - clear, careful, creative, cheerful and conversational... i should probably clarify those in another post...

ennyhoo.... here are some of my fave lindy-ish/west coasty mashups...

(and for the record i would freeekin KILL OR DIE ( no, not really) to go to The Boston Tea Party... and learn me some WCS...)

and then, there's this west coast video that ALWAYS makes me laugh...

happy friday!!!

read: the girl who circumnavigated fairyland in a ship of her own making

2013-01-03T09:52:00.000-06:00

The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making by Catherynne M. Valente
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

i'm pleasantly surprised at how much i enjoyed this book. in many ways it reminds me of alice in wonderland, but i find september a much more likeable, relatable and stronger heroine than alice.

i was waiting to lose interest but the pace of the imaginative storytelling and the gradual unveiling of the extraordinary realms of fairyland kept me going.

my only complaint - i would've liked to see and learn more of september's companions, a-l and saturday. (i hope that isn't a spoiler)

i'm especially looking forward to introducing my daughter to this book who has a love for winged beasts, fairies and adventure. slightly worried she might want to make the trek to fairyland through a wardrobe though... ;)

originally, i picked up the book because i saw its sequel on the shelf at my local library. although that looked tempting, i decided to read in sequence. hopefully, the sequel doesn't disappoint because the first in the series certainly did not.

View all my reviews

eye habs eh code en by nodse....

2013-01-02T22:37:00.002-06:00

besides my laptop screen, this is my view today...

my short & stout teapot (brand new in box, that i scored at the thrift store for a couple of bones), ginger and peach tea w/ lemon & honey, and my fave (it's seen better days) mug that i bought during a visit to the Cabazon Dinosaurs. clearly, they need to find a new source for mugs and i need to get a new one...

looking back, as a child, i was rarely ill. i wasn't the kid who got the award for perfect attendance, but it was really rare. my pediatrician used to joke that because i was hospitalized for extended periods and pumped full of medicines, i would be fine.... "chicken pox? probably clear up in a day." "dog bite? is the dog ok?"

and for most of my adulthood, my health luck held up... then, i had the paloma.....

i guess i should be mildly comforted that "it's normal" for "things" to go "wackadoodle" after the birth of a first child... "Eczema? Are you a new mom?" "Allergies that you never had before? Are you a new mom?" "Acne breakouts that you also never had before? Are you a new mom?" >_<

and now that i'm 40, i'll be sure to break out into song with each and every new health related surprise!!!

Can you just see me at my first mammogram:

no. let's not go there...

ennyhoo... i read somewhere on teh interwebs that:

* drinking a cup of warm water with half a lemon everyday really helps to boost immunity...

* drinking spearmint tea helps to alleviate acne...

* ingesting local honey will proactively desensitive an allergy sufferer from airborne allergens in the spring...

so, i actually started doing these things a few months ago.... this cold is maybe the second (full spectrum) cold, i've come down with since the kids started ~~biowarfare~~ school this year. usually i catch colds at least once a month and i've noticed my symptoms are mild and don't last long... hopefully, i will see changes in my allergies this spring and the acne before the paloma goes to high school - and then we'll both have spearmint teas....

ok now, is when you pat my blog on the back and tell me how proud you are of me.... >:)

yeaaaaaah..... thanks for helping to clear my lungs... stay healthy, dear friend... :)

happy new year! greetings 2013!

2013-01-01T13:33:00.000-06:00

ugh... i can't believe how long it's been since i posted to my lonely neglected blog.... but really... how many times have i written these words in the (almost 10yrs old) life of this blog??? lol... :)

onwards! i guess... :)

looking back on 2012, i realize now it was a "rebuilding" year. last january, i challenged myself:

"...to be a better me, friend, mother, wife, etc...to continue to challenge my creative process by sewing more (and altering less - i find i've been altering more clothes (not recycling, restyling or upcycling) for friends & friends of friends. i hope to cut back on that...), crafting more, writing more and drawing more.... being more consistent about these challenges, stopping the procrastination & ignoring the fear of failure...."

sadly, i didn't sew, craft or draw more in 2012.... and i will try not to define that as failure... hopefully, i ended up challenging/channelling my creative process in different ways...

looking back, in jan & february i did an "ok" amount of sewing, dancing and blogging.

in march, i celebrated my 40th year on earth with a weekend trip to san francisco to celebrate with some of my dearest and closest friends and to dance my boo-tray off. it was unforgettable... so blessed! it was very difficult to leave and i was a blubbering mess at the airport... incredibly bittersweet... probably why i didn't even blog about it... i should probably write a post-post-post dance weekend birthday recap.... :)

paloma celebrated her 9th birthday with a trip to the local Claire's to shop and get her ears pierced. FINALLY! (filipino ancestors be satisfied!) then, we headed to American Girl Place for some more retail therapy and so Piper (the doll) could get her ears pierced too and get some glasses to match paloma's... After a stop at the Lego and Disney stores, we had lunch at her favorite restaurant, California Pizza Kitchen.

in april, i did more sewing... and even more dancing.... and slowly came to the realization that i had "somehow" (ha. snort.) injured my back. keep in mind, i have always had back problems since i fell down some icy, concrete stairs in college. so, when there's a problem with my back, i'm acutely aware... i was advised to stop dancing for a couple of... wait for it.... MONTHS. the silver lining - i found a lovely chiropractor who was a wonderful companion on the road to recovery... while i recovered, i read a fair amount ( i read 14 books in 2012! 3 shy of my personal challenge of 17 though... ) and caught up on a LOT of tv - Supernatural, Dr Who, Sherlock and Downtown Abbey mostly.... and then, the paloma's school choral group got to sing the national anthem at a Sox game!!!

and then, i got a job in may! i KNOW!? totally out of left field... with my apparel background, i didn't think i would ever get another similar job in a related field, here in chicago... i currently work for Otabo assisting designers with their initial inquiries & updating them on the development and manufacture of their footwear collections... it's been a very educational, inspirational and exciting 7 months. the transition from sahm to wa&ohm continues to be more challenging than i thought it would be... and we're taking it one day at a time... :)

in may and june, we welcomed two babies into our family! my stepbrother and his wife brought baby olivia in the world on mother's day. My little (?) sister and her husband celebrated the birth of baby rafael in late june... Canada, you lucky country... ;)

porkchop graduated from kindergarten in may and paloma completed 3rd grade with good grades and an A award (a wonderful award citing her improvements over the year). we were and are very VERY proud... and relieved... shortly thereafter began another long summer of whining and complaining... thankfully, it still occurred a whole foot or two beneath my ears... *sigh*

in july, i started dancing again - AND THERE WAS MUCH REJOICING!!!! i also took some archery lessons... who's going to have a valuable skill come the zombie apocalypse?? THIS GIRL!!! *fistbump* i'm fighting the urge to buy a no frills (is there such a thing?) bow/arrows & set up a target in my backyard.... >:)

we welcomed a new kitten to our family in august. we had a little health scare with bailey, our 17yo elder kitty. after a visit to the ER, they determined that she had some kind of brain tumor and probably wouldn't be with us much longer... they gave her a month... so, we thought to soften the emotional blow on the kids (us, really) we might get a kitten. so, after a couple of trips to the ASPCA, we found and adopted rascal. he has lived up to his name many times over... what a handul!!! :) and bailey? 4 months later, she's doing fine. she had a checkup recently and everything...

i tried and failed at another blog challenge in august as well.... i may try to resurrect that challenge though, it was a really good one based on lindy hop. and i really need some inspiration to rekindle that dancing fire... not so recent events and people in the chicago dance community soured me on dancing... but i can't dwell on it anymore, it's absolutely killing any kind of love i have for dancing...

september came and went.... thankfully. :')

in october, the thin man and i celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary! WOOT!! YAY US!!!

and then, i was totally lame and didn't even post pictures of porkchop and paloma's AMAZEBALLS costumes as dr. who (tennant) and a weeping angel... another post i must recap...

november and december have been quiet and reflective for the most part. the thin man celebrated his birthday with his new love - his iphone 5. i swear - he and siri got a thang going on.... O_o the porkchop also celebrated his 7th birthday with 6 of his closest buds... they ate pizza and played video games while screaming... i assume it was the closest thing to a fraternity house i will ever experience... a few days later, i could hear again.... christmas and new years were spent quietly at home with my family this year... a charming change from the bustle of travelling we usually have at this time of year...

all in all, we had some very good and very bad times in 2012. for some of my closest friends and family, it has been the worst year, riddled with terrible, terrible events.... with only friendship and support to offer, it has left me feeling so helpless and unhelpful for them.... we'll just persevere to be present and constant and patient...

well, i sincerely hope that 2012 was good to you and that 2013 proves to be full of good surprises and prosperity and love, lots and lots of sunny and comforting love... because we all deserve copious and abundant amounts of that...