~Lessons Learned~

Manifest It All!!!

2019-10-05T13:34:00.002-06:00

Manifesting is different than wishing........Wishing is simple and overused, we wish our hair was longer, we were taller, we were sleeping while sitting in boring meeting. Manifestation is our way to really get what we want and need for our higher good. For our mission our purpose to help us and allow us to experience things we focus on to bring into our existence for growth and joy if done correctly. Manifestation can and is a great learning tool and if we look at all we have manifested with intent of joy we can learn to manifest nothing but happiness.

Manifestation can also represent the old cliche, be careful what you wish for you just might get it, especially when we yearn for something we had, but let go and then manifest it back into our lives. Everything we currently have in our existence, we manifested. The pillows on our couch, the trinkets on our mantels, etc. Have you ever took the time to look around and really see the things that you manifested at one time yet haven't given any attention in a long time? Have you ever asked yourself why did I want it? Why don't I want it now? I have manifested big and little things in my life, some I have been happy to have and others not so much. So I know we have the ability to create our lives to fit our needs as well as allow our soul to grow. Most of what I manifested I wasn't quite sure I actually manifested until after it appeared in my life. I have a several things in the works right now (actually I have been trying for a long time for some, but yet they never quite took form) I wasn't sure what the hangup was.....but after some inner research and reflection, I have found what worked for me in the past. While I can't attest this will work for everyone, I know it works for me.

First I took time to look at the things that I have already manifested and took my mind back to the time and the feelings I had at the time of "wanting" and realized each and every time I knew what I wanted but there was a lot of "gunk" that was surrounding the vision. You know the how, when, what if's-I was trying to control how to get it rather than just allowing. I then decided it was something I wanted enough that I didn't care how it came about, I became excited because I knew it was going to happen. Then I looked at each day as it was the day before Christmas, you know that feeling that you had when you were young and couldn't wait to unwrap that toy, the one you would have so much fun with, the doll you would love, the bike you would dream at night about riding the next day. The joy that filled you up? That is where I took my mind each time I thought about what I was manifesting. I didn't think of what color the wrapping was, who was going to give it me, how it was going to get there, I just allowed the joy and excitement to surround the thought. The thought almost became a gift as I would visit it whenever I was having a bad day for even just a minute and each time it brought the joy to my mind and always improved my day. Then I got out of the way and allowed it to unfold. The funny part is the time up to the actual manifestation was just as wonderful as the manifestation itself, because once I moved out of the control, the way things came about was so awesome to experience.

Once the thought became a reality, the real work started. You see that I found that if you really want to manifest something, the way you handle it once it is yours can either make manifesting easier or harder. Now is the time for reflection, for gratitude and constant re-evaluation, for soul growth and to take something you were excited for and allow it to evolve and continue to bring you a lifetime of lessons and joy. You know how you think back on the bike you wanted and the fun it brought and how you wish you had that happiness again? Well you can and you can keep it. But you have to appreciate it and see what it brings you, the feelings, the people, the dreams, and use the gratitude to build on your inner happiness, to use that inner gratitude to influence others, to encourage and show others their potential by appreciating your own power and using it to manifest anything your heart tells you it needs.

When we use our power to create happiness, it is our responsibility to see it for the joy it brings and make it grow, for once it begins to grow, it multiplies.

Self Judgment

2019-06-09T11:17:00.000-06:00

Judgment comes from our experiences, from the way we view the world, comes from our "beliefs" that we have learned and ultimately hold as our truths. Wouldn't it be beautiful if we could release the judgment we hold in our heads, especially the judgment we place on ourselves.

I've been traveling down a path that was carefully orchestrated just for me. I created it and when it became mundane or boring I added more. Picture a path in the middle of a beautiful open space. At the beginning it starts just like the yellow brick road in "The Wizard of Oz" (I relate to the lion.....another blog :) ). It is beautiful, big, and seems to go on forever. There are portions of the road when I look further down the road where it seems to vanish (I know now those are the dips in my journey). I can see a beautiful light, rainbow (I love rainbows.....they are magical) and the beauty from the light helps me continue. I made sure the light came from above so even when the dips were really long and seemed to go down, at times like going to the depths of hell, I could just lift my head up and see if even a glimmer, I could see the light. If I could see the light, even a piece of it, I could close my eyes and feel the warmth and beauty of both the light and rainbow and eventually pull myself up and continue to reach the hill where I could bask in the light and rejuvenate.

So just like everyone else, I started out on my journey totally oblivious to everything in store for me, but happy to experience. Being much older and wiser now, I can see that my soul was equipped with all it needed, however my ego had a mind of its own and it constantly berated, judged, and compared itself to everything around it. I was like a magnet watching others on their journey and recognizing both the good and bad. However, I took the bad and placed everything that seemed painful and scary in a bag and threw it over my shoulder as I went on. The bag became heavy and eventually I had to hold it in front of me with both hands to carry it with me. Never realizing the bag developed a hole in it as i at times drug it along. The fear I placed in this bag was now providing the prickly thorns I would continue to step on along the way. Instead of taking the time to sit down and remove the thorns, I continued on, figuring if they stayed in my feet I wouldn't repeat the experience that caused the pain. This helped me in my "self judgment" that I would also put in my bag and add to as I went down this path. Eventually the bag became so full I couldn't see anything else.

By the time I reached the half mark of my journey I finally put the big bag down and instead of looking to the light, I turned around and started looking at where I came from and everything that I went through on that journey. I realized it was time to open that big bag and start to analyze what was in it. The road behind me twisted, had huge valleys, seemed to flatten out at times, and veered off into the trees many times. It was beaten, dusty and I could see the worn parts the places I found myself walking through time and time again. There were so many places that were darker than others and I could see some of those areas had another path intertwined in them. At each of these dark places in my path I could see the path that led me away from the dark and into the light again. A calming feeling, I sent gratitude for each one. I have felt beaten, tired and at times like I just wanted to give up, so it makes sense why I am taking the time now to sit and feel what I've carried for so long and try to understand it. I don't want to keep dragging this heavy bag with me. I tried just leaving it and stomping onward.......that didn't work. Without the bag I was even more frightened, I mean hell that is where all of my experiences and knowledge was and if I didn't carry it with me I would truly fail on my own. So it wasn't long before I went back and picked it up AGAIN.

As I look back I do so now with the same courage that the Cowardly Lion found, the courage that was always inside of me. I look back alone and as I open the bag and slowly pull out each fear, judgment, belief.......I listen with my heart and soul and evaluate each one and recognize the way they shaped my experience, held me stuck and realize I have the right to appreciate them and discard them. Funny as I get older I understand what selective memory is, yet when I look back on my journey I see myself at the age of seven, I know now that is the age that the word "abandonment" came into my existence. I had no idea at the age of seven this word would grip me like it did and hold me captive to my desires and make me act the way I did for so long. Abandonment caused me to worry, fear, practice the "get them before they get me" mentality, settle, accepting less than. Unknowingly I was creating a moist breeding ground for my fear and it showed up daily, it found a place right up front in my mind and it took over. I can't even express the feelings and thoughts that I lived with day in and day out. I use to wish my secret power was to become invisible but still able to watch others and route them on from the sidelines. However, my soul had a different idea, this is the reason I also have a BIG personality. My soul is loving, kind, compassionate, strong, afraid of nothing and loves to build others up......total contrast to my ego which is fearful, feels ugly, always wanting to prove itself, untrusting, and angry. My ego taps into my big personality at times hooks itself to the BIG part and then the negatives which are my ego magnify. This has caused me great pain, but recognizing is the first step to change right?

Since I started the journey of really looking at my experience and trying to understand it instead of being mad at it, I've come to understand that we all are really souls on a physical journey and that life wasn't meant to hold onto it was meant to experience and move on, like a huge buffet. Some things we will like others not so much. Because of this I have learned that I can't be abandoned, nothing can ever be taken from me, because nothing was ever mine in the first place. It makes moving on down the rest of my journey more exciting.

I left the bag this time and while sometimes I feel nervous and wonder if I should go back and take one or two judgments along with me, I realize I have truly shifted and am totally equipped to "experience" anything. I also know that the rest of my life is meant for creation not for the prickly thorns I've been walking on for so long. On this part of my journey, I will use the love in my soul to heal my pain which will strengthen my body to move through unscathed. I recognize that my soul may need to have that "hard talk" with my ego every now and again. But this time, I allow my soul to take the wheel, throw my ego in the back and let it go for the ride.

Life doesn't have to be scary when lived in gratitude and respect!! xoxoxo

SOUL PURPOSE

2019-06-02T10:57:00.002-06:00

I have found lately that all of the turmoil my mind has caused me was in a desperate attempt to find out my purpose and reason to be a participant in this world. Was I here to save the whales? Find a cure for cancer? Was I important enough to have a purpose......I mean I hear it all the time that everyone has a purpose. I was finding that I was becoming increasingly anxious in finding out what I was here to do, I mean what if it had eluded me for so long that I have wasted my time doing something I shouldn't have been doing? I don't want to have to start over again, to have to come back and repeat the pain when I could have just done it this time around. So I have been asking and asking and then so defeated when it doesn't come back quickly. I know that the answer has been there and given to me over and over. I was just looking for more or a different answer I guess.

I found that purpose doesn't necessarily come from what you do, but purpose is actually what your soul came here to experience, what you do is how your soul experiences. I believe my soul came here to experience fear, acknowledge it, spin it around inside, feel it, accept it for what its worth and release it. In order to do this I have to first know that I have the ability to overcome any fear that comes my way, because we all come equipped to handle everything....(it's the way we show by example and acquire compassion and empathy for others which helps ignite them). We are all intertwined, we are all one, we are all energy and the way we show up in our own lives truly has an impact and influence on others. It is our ego mind that provides us challenges and allows our soul to dabble in experiences. We are more powerful than our ego and have the ability to create and experience miracles in our lives and it becomes easier and healthier when we understand we are creating our lives. The ease comes when we see that we are part of the creation and therefore can add a different ingredient whenever we need. Too often we get stuck in believing in karma, sadness and that we deserve the pain due to the guilt and other negative emotions. It is your responsibility to your soul to love yourself and acknowledge all of your power and set it forward in motion to achieve greatness in your life and experiences, for your accomplishments and experiences are lessons for others around you.......do not judge others and their experiences, but dig deep inside and see what the lesson is teaching you. Bless the other completely for what they have taught you.

While I know my soul purpose was to experience fear I also know that I set up loving and caring people who want to help me dig for the ultimate goal of defeating the negativity and embracing the love that is all around me. Knowing fear can not hurt me, but love can propel me. I AM bigger than my ego, my fear and with my recognition and movement through it, the energy that I bring into this world and around others provides the world with more positivity.

You don't need to cure cancer, but who knows maybe what your soul's purpose is this time around inspires another to find the cure. Stay true to you and your soul. It will take you to great places.

I AM

2019-05-31T12:40:00.003-06:00

I AM. That is all. That is all I need for I am = individual consciousness. Learning and practicing to keep your mind focused on "I AM" will greatly increase your wellness and your attitude to life and the journey that you are traveling. I use to believe that Karma was like the devil, the pied piper if you will. The bag of ugliness and negativity waiting to throw shame, guilt and payback. The only way to wrong your right. I find my mind shifting, my beliefs held me back, kept me stuck and allowed me to struggle as I walked through life. My beliefs as much as I wanted them to be cloaked in light and love were ultimately wrapped in fear. The fear comes from not knowing recogizing loving and beleiving in myself. The journey I walk through comes from me, from my mind and fear of what if instead of knowing that I AM and that is all. I am beginning to detach myself from the "world" and it's beliefs and outcomes, as they do not serve my higher good. They serve to keep me down confined and fearful of everything this life has to offer instead of what is inside of me that I have to offer to myself.

I will begin to live from the I AM mantra and experience this lifetime in all of its wonder and be true to I AM rather than what I have believed myself to be. I love who I AM!!

Mirror, mirror on the wall........

2019-05-27T13:36:00.002-06:00

ALL OF MY FAILURES HAVE BEEN SUCCESSES! Every mistake I make allows me to grow and evolve as long as I recognize and appreciate.

Every person in my life act as a mirror to me and show me if I look deep enough exactly what I am doing in life. They provide me a glimpse of myself from the outside in. As I sit and look at my life, I realize I have lived for so long staring in the mirror and choosing not to see the goodness that those in my life represent and show, but focusing and obsessing on the negative. This is so telling of what goes on inside of me.... I find myself ugly, weak and so fucking afraid. I run away from myself, my wants, my desires and what truly makes me happy. This is evident from the lines that have formed on my face, the sadness and heaviness in my eyes and the constant whirlwind that lives in my chest and stomach. Yet, when I look past the images in the mirror that are ugly and negative I see love, those in my life that support me, believe in me, see the beauty inside. I feel softer, peaceful and full of joy.

I have worked so hard trying to fix those in the mirror, never stopping to fix the issue inside. I'm tired. Tired of the time and energy spent on trying to fix something I have absolutely zero control over. Fixing the inside of me will allow me to look in the mirror and see nothing but beauty.

With this in mind, I thank each and every one of you that have shown me both the negative and positive thoughts I have inside. I am forever grateful that you never left and remind me that I haven't forgotten myself either. We are all works in progress and it is about time I work on fixing the real issues inside and begin loving me. The past has brought me a great deal of stress, however it is in the past and I look forward to the future and know the past doesn't have to repeat itself, for I have the strength and desire to live in the now! For that one friend that told me years ago that I think too much...............you are so right. Life doesn't have to be so hard.

PS. I have often wondered what it meant.......to sit in the emotion, for me it means to allow the heaviness and uneasiness inside to pass with no judgment or need to fix, just be aware.

Self-Acceptance

2019-02-03T01:46:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wanted to fit in so badly, you lose yourself completely?

My desire for acceptance started as far back as when I was 7. I wanted the acceptance from my brother. I would beg to go fishing and hunting with him and my dad. My father always let me go, however my brother NEVER embraced the idea and teased me endlessly. By the time I was in the sixth grade, not only was I striving to get the best grades (just like him), but I was playing every “boy” sport there was to participate in. I became a tom boy and it was then that I started to lose myself. In the 7^th grade, I cut my waist length hair to my shoulders and after my father saw it, he wouldn’t speak to me for days. Little did I know the effect the two most important men in my life would have on me, by the age of 13, neither accepted me and that is when I believed I was not enough. I have dealt with countless men who have put me down, threatened, harassed, told me I'm not enough, sexualized me, treated me as though I was second best, all the while calling me a bitch whenever I would stand up for myself. Therefore, my bitchiness was usually focused on women (this was due to comparison...another topic :) ). I would spend the next 40 years trying to fit in and be accepted by men and continually feel “less than” all the while living in fear. I am a passionate thinker who feels best expressing my emotions, yet learned at a very young age my emotions were not handled well or at all by men and I quickly started acting as a “hard ass”. While this served me well at times, it was a lonely mask I wore and I would wish silently that I could be vulnerable and state how I felt and still be accepted. I just wanted to be me. The bitch in me took over and protected the little girl that never felt like she was enough. I have come to realize that the asshole in me wasn’t bringing me what I wanted in life. I am working hard on letting the girl in me, the one with dreams, desires, emotions, passion and strength to finally start experiencing life without the need for acceptance from anyone. It is time for me to be happy and proud of who I am and not for who I believe others want me to be.

Mercury in Retrograde

2018-11-14T20:50:00.000-07:00

Are you ready? Exactly what is it and how do you prepare to move through November 16-December 6. First I'm not an astrologer however, I know that when Mercury is in Retrograde, things seem to get all screwed up. Mercury is the fastest planet and during this time it orbits faster than the earth and seems to be going backwards. You may find that you will experience more doubt, uncertainty, don't get married during this time, don't sign important documents, not even a handshake. Instead, release.....release negative beliefs, thoughts, patterns, people, etc from your life. Clean out your closets (literally). This is a perfect time for self-reflection and relaxing.

Here is a quick overview of what each sign may encounter:

Sagittarius-issues with getting where you want to go-this period you may see issues with your mode of transportation. Have a back up plan

Capricorn-you may find yourself struggling with control. You will not be the one in the driver's seat for everything. Learn to allow others to help.

Aquarius-Adapt and change is what you can expect.

Pisces-Your "gut" instincts will be off. Be sure to look for other answers.

Aries-The more you push-the more resistance you will encounter. You will need to tune into your patience.

Taurus-Watch your attitude. You will anger quickly, which can and will lead to misplaced blame.

Gemini-You will seem to constantly have issues with your social media outlets. Take this opportunity to find other ways to communicate.

Cancer-One word during this time-MOODY.

Leo-You will encounter technical issues. Back things up. Memorize your presentation as you may find you misplaced it.

Virgo-Your undeniable organizational skills will fail you during this time. You will need to keep yourself grounded as you move through this chaotic period.

Libra-Stay away from makeovers, plastic surgery, etc. Relax and read. Turn off your electronic communication, keep your gift of gab to yourself.

Scorpio-While this will be an uncomfortable time for you with turns and twists, stay level headed and you will navigate each turn successfully.

This is a great time to reflect on what you have went through in the year and learn from it. Don't make decisions now on what you learn, just observe and wait until after the 6th when you get back in your "zone" to make movement and decisions.

11/11/11

2018-11-11T08:47:00.001-07:00

Today is a very powerful manifestation day...it is 11/11/11 +(2+0+1+8). 11 is a Master Number, one which defines creation, authentic expression, and quick manifestation. Have you been noticing this number show up in your life? On a clock, license plate, lottery ticket? It shows up to remind you that what you truly want is waiting for you and today is extra special.

Manifesting is more than just wishing on a star and walking away. Manifesting takes focus and belief. Right now, energy around us is shifting, in the next couple of months as we prepare for the new year, is an opportune time to focus what you want for the next year and prepare yourself to receive it.

Be ready to watch as people in your life exit, which makes room for the new to come in. As with most things in life, change is hard, scary and uncomfortable for us. But with this energy shift, change is inevitable, so why not prepare and get what you want with the change?

FOCUS
This word is very important today. Be mindful of your thoughts today, focus on what you want. Remove the nay saying thoughts or the what ifs and focus on your desires.

ENERGY
Your energy creates a vibration that is sent out into the universe and begins to attract to "things, people, experiences" of the same vibration. (See focus above).

NEW
Like I said before this is a day of a pivotal change bringing in what you are aligning yourself for, it is a gateway to attract what you are thinking about..if your thoughts are fixated on "lack" more than what you want, you are sure to attract the lack.

TIME AND PATIENCE
Because this is such a powerful time, be patience with yourself and relax into knowing that the timing of receiving is divinely calculated. Meaning you will receive what you desire (or don't desire) exactly when you are meant to for your higher good.

ACTION
It is time to re-birth your true self. Dig deep and find and release what your soul has been telling you it needs for so long. Take action of focusing on it, seeing it, feeling it, using your energy to create the vibration of receiving it and watch as the universe brings it to you.

Be sure to include belief and trust in your manifesting for without these two things you are actually resisting and trying to force the things you truly desire. Don't question the way it comes to you, accept that however it shows up is exactly how it is supposed to show up. Keep your thoughts positive and your vibration high.

Today manifest the shit out of the abundance that is waiting for you!

SOUL TRIBE

2018-11-01T16:23:00.002-06:00

This seemed like an appropriate topic, since we are in the middle of the "Day of the Dead".

Who is part of your tribe? It is usually made up of a group (or a few) people who seem to "get" you, you click regardless of life style, opinions, or views. The souls that you can go days, months, years without speaking to and once you re-connect, it's as though there was never any time or space between you.

Some, however, are fooled by the terms "best-friend", "family", "PIC", etc. When I was younger, I had a best friend, the best in the world if you ask me, the two of us were inseparable. My best friend betrayed me in a way that to this day I still struggle with if I'm not careful.  I knew for years (really right from the start) that she wasn't there for me, but for herself still I held tight to the fact I had "a person". As all of you know, when in junior high, high school, this was very important. I even tried to salvage the friendship afterwards...thankfully to no avail...out of sheer fear and panic (this must have been my pathetic stage, whew, thank God I outgrew that haha).

While I am grateful for the lesson, the "good" times we had together, and most importantly the ability to move away from her, the experience caused me to retreat inside. For years I found myself wandering in and out of friendships, never getting close or allowing them to stick around for long. This kind of behavior allowed me to protect myself (or though I thought), but it also provided me with some great insight. My inner chatter consisted of self-doubt, which gave room to the "bitch" inside to take over. I am proud and thankful for her as she gave me the power I was looking for, UNTIL, I allowed that bitch to completely take over. After years of her at the wheel, I found myself searching for more within, which is when the "witch" took over and together we slowly explored my soul. I found out that I "knew" when someone was part of my tribe immediately and deep down in my gut (these are the people that to this very day are still in my heart...til the day I die).

I now feel blessed for that time in my life, as it made me more aware of people and their role/part in my journey through life. It gave me the confidence to know I don't need a ton of friends, but the ones that I do have now, I will never give up. You know the ones, they live in your heart, you don't just like these people, you love them and when apart from them you can just think of them and feel safe and secure.

To those of you in my tribe, I am forever grateful for your love!!

Are you ready?

2018-10-29T21:28:00.000-06:00

To dream and receive? I'm watching the amazement of dreams being acknowledged, spoken, believed in and materialize, all while the dreamer ;) stands in awe at what they are able to do in their life with focus and desire in their heart.

I watched today as someone who was lost yesterday received news she never expected!! Congratulations, officer :). The story is extraordinary as she quickly got out of her way, after hours of intense mirror work from a good friend (wink, wink) and allowed all of it to settle in her brain. She went to bed, woke up, emailed me at 1:29 a.m. (really?) about a dream she just had. At 3:44 a.m. I received another email, a blog from my blog (why? I have no idea, I've never received them before) titled YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL (check it out...I wrote it June 2015). At 6:26 a.m. another from her asking what if...? In a nutshell her emails asked questions, the blog answered them. We immediately got in contact with each other and worked through what she wanted, what she feared, and how to get there. We came up with a plan at 9:20 and she was on her way to moving forward. At 3:25 p.m. text stating she was offered a conditional offer (HOLY SHIT)!! At 7:13 p.m. conditional offer turned to a start date in 11 days! We are both still caught up in the whirlwind of the day but even more in complete gratitude at the events, the love and support and the outcome. Couldn't be happier for you!!!

ANOTHER.......not as quick of a turn around but still someone focusing on something, acknowledging it, believing and getting out of the way. She wanted grad school more than anything, took the test two months ago, didn't immediately hear anything and decided to let it go and if it was meant to be it would happen. (I secretly did a reading on the situation the night before the test, it was a positive read so I knew that night it would happen, however I knew it was something I had to keep to myself, as she needed to manifest this on her own). Eventually she almost forgot since she hadn't heard anything and then last week received the news that she was accepted. Congrats to my amazing, beautiful, driven daughter!!!

Just two amazing examples of how you can get what you want in life. If I know most of you, the question HOW is popping up, what did they do?, what were the steps?, etc. with everything that happened today we were cognizant enough to write down the steps taken, that I believe assisted her in such a quick manifestation...feel free to email me and once I get them typed up I will send them to you with complete instructions :)

Today was definitely one of those a-ha days and one that makes you say wow that happened. I also wrote the following in my journal last night after she left.....(hmmmmmmmm). Allowing - the ability to believe and trust-knowing. Having dreams and desires, minus any expectations. Accepting highs and lows and trusting the outcome is for your higher good, regardless what that looks like. Continuing to move forward without force and recognizing resistance.

Damn I love this stuff!!!!!!!!!!

Believe in YOU

2018-06-06T21:54:00.001-06:00

You are stronger than you know. You possess qualities withing just by being you. You can create and manifest anything into your life with just the belief in yourself. Too often we allow ourselves to label or believe we are only as good as others say we are or how society views things we say or do. No one defines you, but you. You have the power but do you have the courage? Don't be afraid to try something you are interested in due to others. Do not live your life for someone else. Live it for you. Take care of you and your heart. Believe that you know what is best for you and allow your spirit to lead you. Rely on your abilities, they will never let you down. Do not compare yourself or life to others, be happy for them and grateful for what you have. Learn to live in the moment and make each minute the best yet.

I am surrounded by so many unbelievable people that follow their dreams, listen to their intuition and allow life to unfold and accept with gratitude both their accomplishments and obstacles. I am truly grateful for every person that has crossed my path and often reflect on their contribution to who I am today. It really is as simple as believing. Do you believe in you? I do!!!

Walking through fear!

2018-05-13T08:25:00.001-06:00

What does walking through fear mean to you? Do you do it or do you run? Running seems like the quickest and at times the safest way to handle it. Pulling your covers up over your head hoping everything that scares you will go away. Sad thing is it doesn't, usually it just festers, it keeps tugging at the covers and always patiently awaits for that moment you peek out from your false sense of protection and lets you know it isn't going anywhere until you face it and overcome it. A very good friend compared fear to an ice cold waterfall. You can feel the mist of the waterfall, you can hear the water hit the rocks at the bottom, you can taste the crispness of the cold, you can smell the power of the water moving quickly and with purpose, you can see through the fall the beauty that is just on the other side of the water, however the fear of moving through the cold is enough to keep you from walking through the few seconds of being uncomfortable into a whole new experience. And for so many of us we remain on the other side of fear, all along every sense of our being experiences the fear, paralyzing us from walking through.

So what would happen if we mustered up the courage and walked through anyways regardless.........what then? Well you would experience so much freedom and inner strength that you may just start looking for waterfalls to walk through. Walking through fear starts with getting real with yourself. What does that mean? You must have faith and believe that no matter what as long as you move through the fear with truth allowing those bottled up emotions to spill out, you won't have to carry them anymore. Having those pep talks with yourself, also being kind and gentle with the part of you that is afraid. Reassuring that no matter what the water feels like you will be okay. Once you move through the humility, emotions, strength, and wonderment you experience is overwhelming. You begin to realize that you are worthy of what is on the other side of the waterfall and the fear that held you back dissipates so quickly, the other side of the waterfall is warm, safe and secure. Be real with yourself, talk yourself through the fear; emotions and all, let them spill out. Once you are on the other side, enjoy the warmth, the security and your courage.

Just remember to error is to find the truth. Check yourself and your beliefs, they may be the one thing that holds you back from your happiness. Re-write YOUR story.

2018-05-13T08:00:00.000-06:00

To my beautiful, wonderful, loving Mother!!!!!!

And to all Mothers out there!!!!

Why?

2018-05-04T22:53:00.001-06:00

Have you ever had the "why" conversation with yourself? You know the one where you acknowledge something that pisses you off and instead of sitting in the pissed off mode all day, you decide to "why" yourself out of it? Let's say you're sitting in traffic and realize you are going to be late for work. Your breathing starts to get a little more intensified. You may find your fingers tapping on the steering wheel. You begin to squint as the foul language is rolling around in your head, while all along watching the minutes tick by. It's at this point, I like to why myself.

I ask myself why are you mad? Well because the idiot five cars ahead of me is stopped at least two cars behind the car in front of him and if he'd just move up, I could probably shave 30 seconds off how late I'm already going to be.
Then I ask .....
Well why didn't you leave earlier just in case there was an accident? Well because I was really tired and didn't want to get out of bed earlier.
Well why are you mad, whose fault is that? (eye roll) mine.
Well then since you chose to sleep in and there isn't anything you can do about it now, turn up the radio and think about the last thing that made you happy :).
Of course that means I'm thinking of being in my cozy bed with the covers up around my neck with my eyes closed. My body starts to relax, my breathing slows down and nothing seems to matter........ah this is nice. And wouldn't you know it, just like my annoying snooze button, the traffic starts moving and in no time I'm pulling into the parking lot and starting my day.

I check myself often and use the why method a lot. Sometimes it takes me longer to get to the truth of why, but when I do get there it allows me to take responsibility for my actions and change the way I look at things. So the next time something is bothering you............."why" your way out of it.

YOU ARE ENOUGH

2018-05-03T22:41:00.000-06:00

It is amazing how many of us believe in others and their abilities, yet rarely realize or acknowledge our own. We can easily and effortlessly cheer on our children, our friends, co-workers and family, yet shy away from speaking kindly to ourselves. It is time that we start the inner dialogue with ourselves and get to know who we really are. Check in with yourself, find out what you need, what you believe in, what you wish someone would say to you and fill that void with your own voice. It is time for you to become your biggest cheerleader.

I'm part of an awesome class right now with remarkable people, each one different and unique in their own way. Every one with a story and insight to share on their terms and at their own pace. All of them have something to learn and even more to teach. I started out as the teacher and yet over time, the things they have taught me and their ability to make me open my eyes even wider is one of my greatest rewards. It is a safe place where walls break down, sharing is key and loving dialogue is exchanged. I am humbled and honored to be a part of such a wonderful group of misfits (because really aren't we all just "screwed" up beings at times) looking for a place to belong. Once you trust and get real, you find out your neighbor has the same fears, quirks, and messy life that you try to hide from the outside and then you feel as though all is right in the world and no matter how bleak life seems, people really do relate to each other. The key to this is being brave enough to open your mouth, let out the fear, and speak your truth, others will respond with the soft place for you to fall all along waiting to help rebuild you or at least provide you with the tools to get back up on your own two feet.

To Julie, Barb, Laura, Jerry, Bonnie, Nachely, William and Rafael, I am truly grateful for each and every one of you and love you dearly. Please know my friends..................YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!

TRUST

2017-08-13T09:37:00.002-06:00

Why is it so hard to trust in yourself? To believe you know what is right for you? For so many they place value of self on others. They seek approval, validation that what they are doing, thinking, choosing is okay from someone else. Have you ever done something from the encouragement of another even though you it didn't feel right? You knew in your gut it wasn't right for you, you could almost see how it was going to turn out, but you did it anyways. Then sure enough it wasn't what you wanted or didn't have the outcome you hoped for and you chalk it up to your self-worth and inability to get out of life what you want. When all along it was you allowing someone else to manifest life for you rather than you trusting in yourself that you had the ability all along to control and run your life. We all do it, listen to someone else's viewpoint rather than trusting ourselves. Feedback and opinions from others are helpful to us in navigating life, whether it is for a different perspective, learning from another's life experience, gathering more information to make the decision, but ultimately trusting yourself to make the right decision for you is all up to you. This is true even when we make the wrong decision, then is when we learn and have the ability to draw from that experience to correct it the next time it pops up.

Life is nothing but a classroom, lessons to be learned, sometimes over and over, sometimes we ace them the first or second time. It is us, our egos that make life harder than it needs to be. Start trusting yourself, ask yourself for the answer and follow your heart. It will lead you exactly where you need to be and pull, push or drag you through whatever you fear!! Trust in you!

Life is too short...........don't waste it!

2017-06-22T23:03:00.001-06:00

I have a friend who is on a spiritual journey right now. For so long she has fought the demons (her ego) that resides in each of us and failed miserably.........just like most of us do. Her fear allowed her ego to steer her life and that compounded the negativity and anger, until eventually like most anything she turned inward to find the answer. I'm grateful she turned to me as well, and together we have experienced some of the most unbelievable soul expansions in the past year. I have watched her grow as she has me and together we took turns experiencing things so the other could learn. She left on her journey and thankfully has allowed me to be a part of it through daily emails, texts, calls and her inspiring blog..... campprayyoga.com (check it out)!!!

I love you my dear friend. Keep going as I'm so excited to see where our journey takes us next.

Ego is...........

2017-05-13T11:38:00.002-06:00

The story of our past that we use to define and identify ourselves. It is identified with form, whether material, physical or thought. We allow our thoughts to run rapid in our minds and intensify them with emotion; ultimately sending our egos into the "I" living, instead of "I am".

Once we understand that form is fleeting, illusive and always changing, we understand that our ego will always search for what it feels is missing inside and when we interact or live in ego we live in fear. The fear increases and fuels our ego allowing us to live in the negative state of mind. We will use others, the adage of get them before they get me and ultimately find ourselves in gossip, judgment, and labeling of others (from our own self made story) to lift us or make us superior, if even in our own minds. Whatever you fight, strengthens and what you resist, persists. We are so busy trying to feed our egos by rising above others that we tend to overlook what we are creating. When we try to obtain goals, our egos go into overload and begin criticizing others.

Undoubtedly when our egos are involved in our goals, we have attached to something illusive and it will change, die, or fade away. At this time, ego usually takes the victim role and the unhealthy chatter in your head leads again to negativity and unhappiness. The ego manifests behaviors due to the need to stand out, be right, be special, control, power, to be more than. When you have reactions to others, when they are able to push your buttons, it comes from a place of lack and inevitabely your ego will always be willing to jump in and defend at all costs to you.

Presence is the only way to free yourself from ego. Awareness and separation will take you to the point of acknowledging and recognizing when your ego steps in and you will be able to detach and ultimately see ego at work in others. Remember ego is not personal, for it is fleeting and changing, it is a war within and once you find how to stay in the present moment, since ego and awareness can reside in the same place, ego will step out. Practicing this will eventually allow spirit to manifest your life in the most amazing way possible.

March = Abundance

2017-03-12T09:53:00.000-06:00

This month is full of abundance. It is your month to tune in and reap the wonderment of what is being offered. Signs from the other side are given daily and often...........for me, they have been my ability to smell has been enhanced. Smells of memories, people, and the unknown come to me daily. I smell the overwhelming scent of something that brings me back to remembering that certain person, at times it is so big it brings my mind back to years ago and the memory is so vivid that for a short time I am reliving it. Feathers and coins pop up every where around me. I see 1111 all the time. I love the ability to stay alert and look forward to the signs.

March is also full of learning and growth, however so many of us are not taking the time to see it, to appreciate it and to feel the gratitude inside. Watch as you see something in a totally different light, a new perspective, which allows you growth and at times peace from the understanding. Living in gratitude this month also manifests things more quickly and allows for you to clearly see and recognize them. Everyday, myself and a couple of friends/family text each other one thing we are grateful for and after talking to a close friend we both realized it keeps us present and I find myself feeling their gratitude. It is a remarkable thing when you take the time to appreciate even the little things in life. Feel free to start this gratitude sharing with me (drop me a text of what you're grateful for..I promise I'll respond). Start the gratitude text with a friend, family member or just write it down for yourself, especially this month and see what comes from it.

February..............

2017-01-28T11:03:00.000-07:00

February is a few days away. I'm sure if you look back at the last month, you will find that it was over in a blink of an eye, however, look at all you accomplished or thought of accomplishing (did fear keep you from walking through?). Or maybe you were instrumental in helping another accomplish something, maybe you learned something huge from somebody else's movement. While this year will be full of self-growth, it will also be full of learning. If you are a part of another's movement/growth, it is not just about them, it is your opportunity to learn, to see, to expand your awareness for what is coming your way.

This next month will start with uneasy growth, learning, expansion. It will be filled with signs and miracles throughout. It will end with justice served exactly as you create it. This is a month for you to prepare your mind, increase your ability to see and understand more and move through all along seeing the signs that tell you that you are on the right path. You should see pennies, feathers, butterflies, and many other indicators. Keep your eyes open and know that however you choose to embrace the first of the month will end with the same result two times fold. February is a month of learning to trust, believe, grow and manifest desires in your life. While they may seem small to what is coming this year, find gratitude in each and every one, for they are the small steps you will look back on that will assist you in the bigger and better things coming your way.

February is your pre testing month.....................make it the best. Stay focused on how you want to be treated, loved, and keep your mind and thoughts fixated on you. Be curious and open to receiving. You will not be disappointed!!

Next step!!!!

2017-01-22T01:57:00.004-07:00

For so many once they have walked through fear and

come out on the other side, they are unsure where to

go or how to get there. The uncertainty of this new found freedom leaves them looking for direction. This is a part of growth, a clean slate an opportunity to provide yourself the much needed indulgence of accomplishment. Take this time to breathe in your strength, or courage and your determination. Give yourself the credit that you so rarely give. Stand proud and assure yourself there is nothing that can hold you down.

AND THEN...............stand in gratitude and manifest your dreams. Learn from the fear and then move forward, knowing that you can believe in yourself and achieve the things that you have kept at a distance due to the fear. Realize your self-worth and put one foot in front of the other as you move towards all you have wanted. For the fear is gone, every time you feel as though your legs become wobbly or you second guess yourself or feel as though you might be stepping backwards, take yourself to the moment of euphoria you felt when you took control of your life and again live in gratitude. For gratitude will continue to aid you in your journey. Your life is taking form continue to mold it just the way you've always dreamed.

BELIEF

2017-01-07T00:38:00.001-07:00

One week has already passed in the new year. Have you noticed the test of self-belief? You have experienced it already and will experience it many times over this year..........What did you do with it? Did you walk through the fear of trusting in yourself and tackle the issue head on? Or were you like the majority and questioned yourself. Asked for others opinion, flipped a coin, or closed your eyes and hoped the problem/question went away? And if you found you questioned yourself, all is well. It's early and you're learning. Be sure to look at how often you changed your mind. How you battled inside, questioned yourself and then how quick you were to look for outside approval or direction.

The next time try allowing the issue to settle within, then ask yourself.....which decision makes you feel the best? Close your eyes and listen. Do not knee jerk give yourself time to allow the process of trust the ability to manifest into a feeling rather than a thought. Continue to think of yourself and what is best for you. Walk away from the decision in your mind if needed and then come back to it after time has passed and ask yourself what is best for you? Listen, believe and walk through with the utmost confidence as you begin to learn to trust yourself. You will find the next time and the next that it gets easier, until it is something you do naturally.

..............2017.............

2017-01-02T00:04:00.002-07:00

2017 provides so many opportunities. It will be lived at a fast pace and will pass by very quickly. It will be full of learning, receiving, and spiritual growth.........for those that are mindful of what they are creating.

Since 2017 is a Universal Year - "1", it is a great opportunity to begin with intentions of using all of what you have learned in the past year to manifest what it is you truly desire. It is truly a year to "begin" again. To re-invent yourself, take the time to clearly to feel what it is you desire, the changes you want to see in your life, in you, in your career, your relationship, etc. Visualize this new you, this new life, trust that it will come and then walk through this year with your heart and eyes open as you will stumble across small signs throughout 2017 that will remind you to stay true to your vision, true to you and the Universe will swiftly bring about all you have desired.

Now with this being said, the biggest obstacle for so many will be fear. Fear will provide delays, stumbling blocks and at times cripple some until they muster the strength to walk through their fears. Acknowledging, facing, and walking through your fears will strengthen your spirit. It will allow you to believe easier, which will allow your desires to manifest quicker.

If you choose to hold onto your fears and continue to allow them to reside in your thoughts you are destined to relive your past........you see when you conquer your fears you are able to learn the lessons in life that you need to grow. I'm not talking about fears of spiders, snakes, I mean the fear of what others will think, lack of money, lack of being good enough, disappointment, and on and on. Fear leads us to victimization. We find that we walk through life unhappy, unfulfilled and it is usually because of someone else or something else...............or is it? Take ownership of your fears, your choices and change your thinking. Replace fear with belief. Look for the positive even in the most negative situations.

This is the year to walk through your fears and manifest everything you want in life!!!!

Remember...............YOU CREATE YOUR LIFE

2016-03-20T20:08:00.002-06:00

You are currently right where you are supposed to be in life. Are you getting everything you want? Do you know how to focus on your desires or do you find yourself focusing more on lack? Because what you focus your thoughts on is what you attract in your life.

Instead of focusing on what you don't have, focus on what you want and see yourself receiving everything you desire. So many times we know what we want, but allow our thoughts to go elsewhere. I want a new car, but I don't have enough money, I have other bills to pay, etc. Before you know it, you have come up with at least ten reasons why you can't have what you want. Your emotions play a huge factor in attraction as well. If you are sad, depressed or angry, you will sit and stew in negative thoughts, which is what you will attract.

Clear your mind of the clutter and begin to focus on what you desire, see it, and then remind yourself often that you are worthy and allow it to come to you. Stay conscious of your thoughts and gently dismiss and remove the negative replacing them with positives. Don't worry about how your desire is going to come to fruition, just believe it will. Hold that belief and allow the delivery to come as it will. For it isn't your business how you get it, just your "right" to receive it.

2016-02-28T13:13:00.000-07:00

When we make wrong/negative choices it is because we are focusing on our lower love. It is essential to our well-being to prioritize our love, such as self, family, friends, etc. Once you have prioritized your love you will be able to see what frequency you are loving at. Example, if someone confides in you and you in return share the secret with others, you have lowered your love frequency. At this time you would be focusing more on popularity and acceptance from others since you have gossip to share then you are on trust and integrity. Think before you speak or act and keep yourself in the higher frequency of love as often as possible. It is here you will find peace.