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Saturday Morning Comparisons: by haiku

2019-07-10T11:43:00.000-04:00

2 haikus

9 am Sunday morning in downtown Austin:

Cyclists in spandex spin by
Amidst the stench of vomit and homelessness
Empty streets save for a motorcycle parade.

9 am Sunday morning, Alstadt, Mainz:

The sun is shining

A giant farmer's market fills the plaza

Pedestrians, bikers, families smiling together.

6 Months In (almost)

2019-05-29T16:38:00.000-04:00

We're coming up to our 6th month here. It feels especially poignant because our kindergartener finished his first semester in an American school. And boy was that first day full of tears. That day, that week, I think the whole month - every dropoff for every kid, every whatsapp text from a friend back home - anything set me off with this horrible guilty feeling that we had made a terrible mistake. (Full disclosure: I still feel like this nearly every day, but at least I'm not in daily tears about it...?)

I'll never forget that first day of kindergarten. Staying at a dumpy (yet somehow $120/night) hotel with a free breakfast (truly, free breakfast at American hotels is the saddest breakfast), our son asked us to pack him a lunch. How? I asked him to please buy, it would be warm, he could eat well, and ... I didn't have a kitchen. He said, how about an egg sandwich? I put together the saddest egg sandwich I'd ever seen: 2 dry pieces of toast (no matter how much I added butter) with some watery scrambled eggs in between. A cold, dry muffin, and an apple. That would be his lunch. I asked his teacher, when we met her, to please make sure he ate a warm meal in the cafeteria... she later told me he just wanted to eat what his mommy had packed for him. The only time I felt like maybe this could work, in the entire day, was when we picked him up and he said he made a friend. A girl named Shayla had invited him to sit with her. She'll never know how much that meant to his mom but in the whirlwind of stressful months, I needed to know he could make a friend. And we hadn't totally screwed things up for him.

I wish I could say that 6 months later, I don't regret coming back here. But I can't. If anything, being here 6 months brings a new wave of sad emotions. We are 6 months farther away from what was a really easy life. And we're 6 months into the reality that will stay for at least the next few years, with little change we can make to improve our quality of life. It'll continue to be 2 hours in the car every day, sweaty and humid days (for at least several months), feeling lost in a sea of strip malls, big buildings, and bad drivers, and trying to maintain some semblance of the relaxed pace of life we had before. We're 6 months farther away from barbecues with our beloved neighbors and preparing for the end of the vorschul year. Farther away from a daycare that taught healthy habits, didn't drown our kids in milk, or fill the empty space in school days with tv or ipad games (seriously, what is UP with the dependence on screens in our school?). Farther away from an efficient train and transit system, safe bike paths, and pedestrian-only shopping areas that made it easy to pop in and out to grab what I needed. Instead, I spend hours driving around to find a speck in a strip mall, a parking space, and inevitably - need to drive to the next strip mall over for just one more thing.

If I wasn't able to shop online, in spite of having a completely flexible workplace, I wouldn't be able to make this work. In fact, there are so many "problems" that I need help from my parents to solve (making time to go shopping for the boys' clothes... filling in the few hours a day when aftercare isn't available because school is shorter here... etc) - that were not problems at all in our last life. How does our infrastructure here continue to make it so hard to exist within it? Why do we put up with this life, where we work ourselves to death, drive our kids around in our little free time, and try madly to keep up with our household shopping needs somehow in between?

I know there's a better place to live out there. And despite living in the #1 fastest growing city in the state of Texas (or maybe because of?), I still want to go there, and not be here.

The Failure of the Mueller Development in Austin

2019-04-10T11:30:00.002-04:00

About ten years ago, development began on a 'forward-looking', 'sustainable', 'transit-oriented' planned residential development that would be near the city, called Mueller in Austin. Today, it's wildly popular, with higher-than-average per-square-foot housing costs, high HOA fees, and homes selling quickly.

However, I believe it is a total failure.

Austin had a chance to start from a clean slate, where a truly people-centered community could be built. One with dedicated bike lanes, infrastructure for transit growth plans (extra lanes for bus rapid transit lines... tracks for a tram... anything, really). One with businesses sprinkled throughout the community in a way that would offer true walkability. More options like the garden court homes (which sold super quickly, by the way, but are unfortunately VERY limited in quantity) which have protected and shared backyard space for multiple homes in the same way a German baugruppe of housing might. Things that truly foster a community.

Instead, they built a suburb. Every house looks the same. Yes, there are continuous sidewalks (a surprisingly rare find in Austin, even in the 'burbs over here), but that's pretty much all that was "different". If that's revolutionary and forward-looking, boy do we have a long way to go. The homes have small or minimal garden space, in order to encourage communities to gather. But where? You have to drive to a park! Or at best, cycle on a very wide road that you share (hopefully share, anyway), with a car.

I mean, I haven't heard of a bus hitting a house in Mueller like I did in North Loop, so I guess at least it's technically 'safer' for people to live there. But how far have our definitions of 'community' and 'safety' fallen that we still ask people to drive to get around to what they need in our 'forward looking' developments.

Out of principle, I minimize my trips to Mueller. Going there frustrates me so much: there was a TON of potential to really showcase something different. To build a semi-urban development that could serve as an example to other cities. To set up a structure that would allow for a future population explosion, considering the needs of non-drivers (older and younger population) who could (gasp!) coexist in an environment. Instead, when I do have to go there, I see people in their cars, driving from point A to point B. It's just like anywhere else in the US, because apparently we are unable to think outside the little suburban boxes from whence we came.

Is School Choice Killing our Community?

2019-04-05T11:58:00.001-04:00

Chatting with another mom the other day, we were discussing how hard the transition has been to middle school for her son. And a different mom recently shared that they were trying to transfer to a non-neighborhood school, to allow her daughter to be in the same school as many of her friends from pre-school. With so many options for 'school choice' - are we ruining our ability to get to know our neighbors?

Comparison time. In Germany, home-schooling is forbidden. It's possible to transfer from your zoned school to a different one, but you must have a good reason. It either needs to be based on the proximity to a parents' work, or be safer for your child to walk or cycle to without parental supervision. So, all kids go to school and most kids go to the schools for which they are zoned or one within walking distance. Some kids go to private schools, but this is pretty uncommon as well. Generally, kids get to know each other and grow up together. The same was true in India. I was always impressed by how tightly-knit the 'batchmates' of my parents' friends were, even years after they had all finished school and moved on to very different, far away places.

I'm seeing this flipped on its head over here. We see our neighbor kids leaving their house at the same time as we do, but no one goes to the same place. We don't have a foundation on which to base a friendship, except proximity to each other's homes... but everyone has their own friends from their own other activities. Which are constantly changing! With 12 weeks of summer break, and no such thing as all-day school, and a variety of after-school options... there's absolutely no way to consistently provide our kids with a single community. They are constantly facing change and adjustment.

And yes, some might argue this is a natural way of life and we should learn how to adjust to change. I disagree. Building deep friendships is hard, and gets harder as we age. But deep friendships can be more valuable in hard times than family bonds - these are people who we selected to spend our time with. And these types of friendships can grow stronger than family bonds when built over time, when kids are small.

It's simple: by providing socially stable environments for our kids, we are setting them up to succeed. It doesn't always have to be about the 'best school' with the 'best ratings'. It's frankly amazing what people can achieve with strong social networks - regardless of where they studied and what their grades were.

The Inherent Selfishness of Driving a Car

2019-03-11T22:20:00.001-04:00

Growing up in Texas, I heard 'my car' a lot. Often said together, as if it was one word. People loved driving "my car". Going for long rides, in "my car". You get the idea.

Fast forward to living for 7 years in a city with fantastic infrastructure for transportation and bike riding: Mainz. There, I barely drove "my car" (very gladly giving up the long drives in favor of being driven long distance by a train operator)... returning to the land of "my car" feels starkly different. When I'm in "my car", suddenly only my priorities matter. I'm in a rush, late for school pickup, need to finish listening to this one bit of the podcast, have to get that parking spot. Me, me, I. Having my own vehicle seems to foster this belief that I come first. I can usually count on TWO hands the number of cars that run red lights, in any given 15 minute car ride.

The worst offenders seem the least obvious. I've been cut off repeatedly by little hatchbacks proudly sporting a "Human Rights for all" and "Coexist" stickers more often than giant SUVs (though plenty of those, too). Passed on the right, passed on the left, and honked at immediately upon a light turning green. Somehow, this car culture has created a film of anonymity behind which we can hide from humanity, from being kind to one another. In a way, Uber and Lyft make it worse. We went from "my car" to "my private transportation vehicle" in a flash. So where will that leave the next generation, who are not only less familiar with driving themselves around (and paying attention to the world around them to stay safe), but now less familiar with having to know where they're going?

On the tram and the train, I often saw people offer a seat to someone older who was standing. A mother with kids. Make room for a stroller, even if a little reluctantly. Smile, tolerate, and even play willingly with a stranger's kids. Hey, none of us have to drive, we may as well get along.

Also, since each neighborhood is set up like a mini-village, it is easy to bike or walk to the center of the neighborhood to shop for what you need. I commonly saw elderly people riding bikes or with walking support operating independently to get what they needed, on the same street a mom with a stroller and kids running amok would be, running errands. Turns out we can all actually coexist, we just need a safe, walking-friendly environment in which to do so. And it's not that easy, as many cities in the US are learning, to modify an environment that is NOT walking friendly to be so. Old habits die hard, and all of that.

Now it's not always so rosy - delayed trains and terrible weather put us all in a grouchy mood. But at least we could commiserate together. What is wrong with this system, we'd say, shaking our heads in frustration. Solidarity in misery creates a community too. And somehow it felt a lot more pleasant than angrily cutting in front of another person, who is probably just as frustrated as you are that traffic stinks, the light is too short, and the roads are terrible.

In a somewhat timely article, I'm reading this with a wry smile. It seems that we are so good at navel-gazing, even our own public radio, that we forget how well set up this type of thing already is. In many places, people won't have to wait until 2050 (or longer if we're in the US, let's be honest), to have the lifestyle so beautifully described here.

I think what I'm saying is, I miss my train. I'd gladly trade in "my cars" and rely, instead of on Uber or other new private means of transportation on the road, some better form of mass transit and truly bike- and walk-friendly living.

Repatriation, Month 2

2019-02-22T10:17:00.001-05:00

We're in the second month of returning stateside. What an evolution it's been. We relied heavily on family to get us through the first few weeks, spending nearly every weekend with cousins. It was nice, but they have their own routine, and we needed to establish our own.

Finally, with the house painted, new floors installed, furniture delivered (hallelujah!), assembled, and boxes (mostly) cleared out, it looks like a house we can live in. Camping had become exhausting and wore the kids out. On the other hand, suddenly having a full house somewhat overwhelmed them - they would start massive fights over a single toy, ignoring the fact that there were now quite a lot of options to choose from. Given our long-term exhaustion over the past several months, this has been an annoying challenge.

We have started to establish more of a routine though, and I already feel my mood lifted because of it. I hope it's the same for the kids. The early morning school routine hurts (whyyyyy do we have to start at 7:45 am, AISD??), but it makes weekdays fly and the weekend sleeping-in routine absolutely glorious. With German class Saturday mornings, no other planned activities but playdates with friends, or friends-of-friends, and less and less "urgent" house project work needed, we are starting to see the light of being able to live in the place in which we live.

We all still deeply miss Mainz, but I am starting to see opportunities that living in Austin will afford us. On the one hand. On the other, there was a violent threat at the very close high school the other day, and it was a reminder that there are some things I'd simply never have to worry about in Germany. And on the one hand, right now I'm writing this from a business trip and my father-in-law was able to come and help, on-demand, with the boys. But on the other... there's something odd about having to ask your parents for help, having managed entirely without them, without needed anything from them, for several years. Living away somehow helps parents forget that you are no longer their child in need of parenting, and freezes you in time in their eyes, which I find to be endlessly frustrating.

No matter how long we are here, I am endlessly grateful for what I've been able to learn by living in Europe - about myself, and also about how living a high quality of life should be something you do now, rather than aspire to do when you retire. And it can show up in a variety of ways in your life, be it better quality home construction, reliable roads and courteous fellow drivers, walk- and bike-ability incorporated into city design, and being able to trust an infrastructure that simply works.

Things that I used to value - shopping on Sundays? Conveniently open late-night takeout? Big homes with big yards? They just seem excessive - I much prefer a quiet family day with no shopping allowed one day a week, in a neighborhood where I get to see friendly neighbors every day, smaller scale grocery stores where I quickly run in for just what I need, and businesses built right into the community rather than all baked into strip malls on busy roads with angry drivers everywhere. Now the question is: what type of life do we want? And how do we plan to get there now?

Today, I'm missing...

2019-02-19T16:32:00.000-05:00

Walking around the corner to my hair place, to the bank, to the small store for just a quick pop-in, and no problems with parking (because I didn't have to drive).

Filling up gas once a MONTH.

Not driving for days. More than 5 days in a row, sometimes.

Bakeries. The bread. The zimtschleife, and butterzopf for the perfect french toast.

The small-ness. Why does everything have to be so big here? It takes so much longer!

The community. Where are all the people? I don't see any elderly people getting fresh air and walking around. Oh right, because it isn't safe to. I don't see kids running around freely in groups. Same reason. I infrequently see moms pushing strollers but there may be 3 on a good day, vs around 100 where we used to live.

My heated floors made of real wood, and heated bathroom tiles. They felt so good on my feet.

Tilt-turn windows which let in the exact right amount of fresh air. Also, the non-draftiness in general of high-quality windows, no matter what quality build of your home.

My small but super well designed kitchen. What is up with kitchen cabinets and why aren't they always made of drawers?

December in Mainz is for Change

2019-02-07T11:22:00.000-05:00

Somehow, here we are. Full circle. Nearly 7 years later, with 2 kids and (still) a cat in tow, the time has come to go back the the US. I won't say home, because home has become a completely fluid concept. Home, for now, is transit. Home, for the last 6.5 years, has been Mainz. For the last 4, Bretzenheim, a place I will remember as the best little neighborhood there ever was. And for the future, Austin, TX, USA.

We are excited but anxious to make our new home in central Austin, finding new friends and rediscovering old, and somehow, some way, maintaining friendships we've made across different places over the many years we've lived away from Texas. Re-learning how to live near family (hey, it sounds weird, but I feel like there is a skill to learning how to live in a place with close proximity to the people who raised you - especially after nearly 18 years of living nearly entirely on your own) will be a challenge unto itself as well.

These last few months, I've posted just a handful of the things I'll miss about Mainz, about Germany, and about Europe. The list could go much longer. The biggest lesson of it all for me, was to embrace what I didn't know, without fear, and with trust. I can figure out what I need to, whether it's learning to drive a manual transmission, obtaining a German driver's license, or giving birth in a hospital (twice!) where limited English is spoken. I know how to ask for help when I need it, and rise to meet a tough challenge. I've also learned how to find my own way in a way that's right for me, and trusting that I know what that is without needing to bring anyone else's ideas or opinions.

I hope that living in a place from where I came doesn't turn me back into the person I was before I left. I fear falling into old habits, getting comfortable, and not acknowledging the leaps of personal and professional growth that living abroad has allowed me. At the same time, I hope I'm not so mired into what I had, and what was, that I don't enjoy what I have, what is. Here's to a new start in a new year, however long we end up in this new environment.

November in Mainz is for leaves falling, gray skies, and Christmas markets

2018-12-03T06:57:00.000-05:00

Oh how cold it is. November is typically when the skies turn gray, it gets dark quite early, and Christmas lights begin to slowly appear. One of my favorite memories when we lived in Washington, was the swirling leaves falling all around in fall. Although the trees here look bare by the end of the month, it's rare to see unraked piles of leaves on the ground -- this is true German efficiency. As soon as the leaves fall to the ground, they're whisked away by city services. It's quite a sight to watch how quickly the ground is cleared!

It's a good time to pull out board games, light some candles, and get ready for baking lebkuchen. And towards the end of the month, time for the most festive activity of all: Christmas markets! As cold and dark as it may be, the glow of the lights and warmth of the hot drinks and people all around have a magical way of brightening up a dark month. In Mainz, it traditionally begins the Thursday before the first advent - this year it's quite late, on 29th November. The city of Mainz is also running an Adventsbahn: leave your older children or join your younger children while you're out shopping, for a free tram ride in the city, complete with a visit from the Weihnachtsmann, Christmas stories, crafting, and more onboard the tram. It sounds amazing, and it's where I will be on Saturday.

*update - the adventsbahn IS in fact amazing. It took an hour to make the full roundtrip, including potty breaks for the kids and snack / smoking breaks for the caregivers. They were happy to take kids alone and help parents find their kids at any stop, but most parents stayed on. It was helpful to bring snacks (we went too close to lunchtime). And it's hard to miss! It's well marked and decorated and stops at the usual tram stops including Schillerplatz*

We also love our neighborhood Christmas market (although friends who have lived here longer complain that it's "so small"!), which is hosted early one weekend in December, and picking up cardboard boots at Nahkauf that the kids can decorate and return to the store for St Nikolaus to fill up for them on December 6.

Although all this lead-up to Christmas leaves me exhausted with activities by the actual day Christmas arrives (and I haven't even mentioned all of the Adventsnachmittags, Christmas parties, and friend gatherings), it sure is a fun journey through the advent days to the 25th!

October in Mainz is for a Golden Fall

2018-11-08T04:47:00.000-05:00

Can you believe it's already November? Neither can I. Let's talk about October for a minute...

Goldene Herbst is one of my favorite times of the year. This year, we've had one of the best. Mid-October and the average daily weather has been in the mid-20s (celsius) with nonstop sunshine. The leaves have started changing colors and falling, the ivy climbing up stone buildings looks more elegant than ever, and the first Arctic blast is on its way.

After a festival-filled September, October tends to be a little quieter. Federweisser stands at the market mark the month, and a day of Sunday shopping (MantelSonntag) at the end of the month is the only major activity.

Mid-October also marks the time the cranes fly south for the winter, and Mainz is one of the few German cities where you can really hear them prepare for a few days before, and then fly over the city on their way to Spain. There must be thousands as they take over the skies for an hour, flying in formation and avoiding the airplanes. It is quite a sight to see.

This month is a great time to enjoy the last warm days and sunny evenings before the time changes. And don't forget to change your tires! After the bi-annual tire check, annual car check and windshield wipers switcharoo, and pre-winter car wash, I'm thinking about September but getting ready for November.

September in Mainz is for Festivals

2018-09-07T16:25:00.003-04:00

September in Mainz is a wonder. It's sometimes a late summer (warm, late golden sun in the evenings), and sometimes gloomy and gray (great days for cuddling with a blanket and tea). It's always got a lot going on - just about every weekend, there's a festival of some kind. Here, below, my personal faves...

The first weekend in September (and last weekend in August)

Annual Weinmarkt. Every year, the Volkspark is filled with wine stands and food areas, and an artists' market. There's even a kids' corner - but it gets crowded early. You can get there by bus, best by bike, or attempt to park somewhere nearby.
Another great option is the Ziegelei Fest - a small festival at a neighborhood kindergarten in Bretzenheim, featuring course work from the VHS. Some fun dance and music performances accompanied by a local honey stand, cake table, and tacos!

The second weekend September is even busier:

Appel Happel has several festivals around apple picking - including a night picking Saturday night this weekend.
Intercultural Week kicks off with a colorful, food-filled festival in the Marktplatz, usually the same day as the...
Wissenschaftfest at the Staatstheater. Free and educational!
If you prefer wide open spaces, the Zitadellenfest kicks off too, with a book fair and tour of the tunnels. It's the only day every year you can get into the Citadel!
Open Door Day at the big fire station in Bretzenheim.

Mid-September

Rhine River Cleanup (Sept-15) - all along the Rhine including in Mainz!
Mainzer ApfelFest at Appel Happel (Sept 22-23) - it can get very crowded, but it's lovely and great for the kids!

...with more to be added as they come!

4 Perfect Days in Krakow

2018-08-22T08:18:00.002-04:00

I have to admit, when S suggested Poland for a summer break, I was less than enthused. Upon reading about Krakow and then seeing for myself, I could not recommend it enough for a family holiday. It was great! Budget-friendly, walker-friendly, tourist-friendly, and there's so much to absorb just by wandering around.

We spent 5 days and 4 nights, and didn't run out of activities. And there were so many things I wanted to go back to!

Day 1:
We arrived late in the evening with a shuttle (they were great & even brought car seats!), so took it easy during our first morning at the lovely vrbo we stayed at (ahhh, glorious central a/c!). We took a meandering midday stroll to the Cloth Hall in search of trinkets - and found a few pretty Polish pottery pieces while taking in the beauty of the Krakow old town. We picked up a very salty Obwarzanek pretzel for the little ones as we searched for lunch at the Milkbar Tomasza. We ordered way too much food but it was no problem - the restaurant was happy to pack it, and everything was delicious! It is small inside, and got very crowded at lunch. Luckily, they move fast with service so you can get in and out quickly.

After naps, we headed to the fun little Museum of Municipal Engineering, right around the corner from our apartment. The kids loved climbing in and out of old streetcars, and had a blast with the hands-on area. It was really hot inside, but playing air hockey and trying out the car simulator among other activities, was so fun that we weren't stressed about the weather. We wandered a bit in search of food, finding a food truck area, a ton of kid-friendly restaurants, and a restaurant we saved for our last night in town. After an easy dinner at home, a few of us headed to the Secrets of Krakow free night tour and a walk over the bridge to the Jewish ghetto. The bridge was pretty by day, and absolutely gorgeous lit up at night.

Day 2:
Two of us got up early for the Saturday flea market at Plac Nowy (we quickly learned that Sunday is in fact THE day to come here). Though we didn't find much, we took a nice stroll around the quiet city - even restaurants serving breakfast didn't open until 9 am. The plan was to visit Wawel Castle and we should have used the early morning time to buy tickets in advance. Instead, we waited in a long queue around 10:30 am, and faced a limited selection of tickets. We chose the State Room tour with audio guide and the dragon's den. Due to the long lines, we skipped the den walk in favor of kid naps, but the state rooms were really cool.

On the way home, I stopped by the Produkty Benedyktynskie shop for honey (gifts) and beer. It was time for a rest up ahead of our afternoon golf cart tour of the Jewish Quarter, the Jewish Ghetto, and the Schindler factory. In two hours, we learned so much (and, the little one finally fell asleep!) - it was so educational and interesting.

The evening was quiet for me (kid duty) while our friends enjoyed a 3 hour food & vodka tour of the area. While the little ones and I walked over to (finally!) see the fire-breathing dragon, went home for dinner via some excellent ice cream, and called it an early night (ok, some Paw Patrol was involved...), our friends learned about where the best eats were in the city, and tried some tasty Bison Grass vodka!

Day 2 was so packed, but somehow, we had energy to keep up the fast pace on Day 3. Probably because of flea markets!

Day 3:
I woke up early to see the flea market at the Hala Targowa. It made a nice destination for a 4-mile run before the hot sun kicked in, and I enjoyed wandering through the antique knick-knacks. Somewhat randomly, they had an awesome pair of kids' adidas in just the size of my 2 year old for about 4 euros. Double win!

We convinced the kids to bring a soccer ball outside near the Plac Nowy flea market, and switched off kid duty with flea market browsing. Though mostly clothing and shoe stalls (no toys or antiques), it seemed to go on and on - there were so many treasures. Everyone got 'new' shoes, and I was proudly trying out bargaining in Polish! Fun way to spend the morning, capped off with zapiekanka for lunch.

Before we headed back to the flat though, we realized we were missing a phone! Thank goodness for Find my iPhone (turn it on!) - it was forgotten in the park where we kicked around the ball. Whew!

After midday rest time, the kids picked up a tasty takeaway from Curry Up (the chicken was a bit sweet but the mango lassis right on point), while S and I headed out for the Secrets of Krakow by night tour, followed by a tasty outdoor dinner at Alchemia. We had a glass of wine at Bar aWino, but since the outside tables were full, found it a little too bright and warm inside to stay for another - heading home after another full but lovely day in Krakow.

Day 4:
We did a bit of a split on Day 4, so two adults could explore the Salt Mines (highly recommended), and the rest of us could relax a bit on our last day. We wandered around the Jewish Quarter, played a little soccer in the square, walked over the bridge, took naps, and ate ice cream.

In the evening, we bought loads of small cookies at a few different cukiernias for gifts, walked to the old town for a last taste of the musical atmosphere, and ate more ice cream. What a lovely city - I wasn't ready to leave, and could see myself bringing the kids back when they're older to explore some more!

Airbnb, we're done. For real.

2018-08-14T16:29:00.000-04:00

Oh, the community. Uber, Lyft, Yelp, Airbnb... all of these platforms meant to facilitate business transactions across an organically-grown "community" of people, who may otherwise not have the opportunity to realize their dream of being a driver on-demand.... a small-time bed and breakfast host... a travel writer.

The idea of these services has turned into a multibillion dollar industry. And as a semi-urbanite who *should* love the disruption they create for traditional hotels, taxis, and concierge services, I swiftly reject them as fast as I would an Amazon Echo.

After a recent trip to Sopot, where our only viable options for staying were airbnb (though after our trip, I'd now suggest to other people: find another city where you have more than airbnb to choose from), I'm done. Our host was fine, the flat was not. The cost was absurd for what we got, especially once you add in the unexplained fees and inconsistent experiences across different hosts. But the market prevails, as they say. Here's what irks me the most:

Hosts always win.

The review system encourages a host to review you - a PAYING GUEST - as if you were someone they had personal knowledge of. This has never made sense to me because it is about the property, not the people. Why should someone get my money and have the right to publicly opine about how "clean" I am?
I've heard of several stories, including our own experiences, where a place wasn't as advertised. Airbnb customer service is so hesitant to get involved that you're on your own - if you can afford to find a replacement accommodation, it'll be hard to get airbnb to facilitate the cancellation and cost unless something is really bad. Beyond moldy (ew) sheets, broken stoves, etc.

There's never a consistent rulebook

Guidebook, check. Rulebook, it's the wild west. Many hosts require a deposit, but I've stayed in several where they don't tell you what to do on checkout to get the money back. And even if you ask (as I have), you may not get a straight answer (though at least that part is in writing).
It's not that hard to write a short list of requests, if you have them, for guests to complete on checkout. Without it, it can leave guests in a rush to leave but fearing a bad review, flurrying to try and figure out where the heck they're supposed to take out the trash. Every single time I've used VRBO, I have had a clear rulebook. Points to VRBO.

The service fees.

What am I paying for? I know, VRBO has a service fee too. But I have never heard of nor had the same problems I have with airbnb, as with VRBO. Whether their fee is better used or the company is better run, they simply execute their service more effectively. Airbnb has some good press, I'll give them that.

Our apartment in Sopot along with a previous one in Copenhagen taught me that hosts are allowed to have a sense of entitlement. They don't need to tell you the whole story about their accommodation. They can have mini-empires, renting and managing airbnbs on behalf of other people (which wasn't really the idea of airbnb, was it?), taking advantage of the platform without having the requisite licensing a true multi-housing operator might need.

Frankly, I applaud cities who regulate airbnb and airbnb should put better standards on their rentals as well. Regulation is not a bad thing. Having a consistently pleasant vacation experience will usually result in repeat customers. As for me, I'll be off using other websites, of which there are plenty: VRBO, wimdu, onefinestay, home exchanges, and so many more.

3 Truly Perfect Days in Amsterdam

2018-08-08T06:24:00.000-04:00

I recently came back from a business trip to Amsterdam. Since I was all alone, and had a whole Sunday to enjoy a sunny day in the city, it was really more like a vacation. I filled my free time with long runs, eating ice cream, and people-watching; the work days were long but enjoyable too.

We stayed at the phenomenal Hotel Okura. We had a corporate rate of 205 euros / night excluding breakfast - and the location was in the heart of de Pijp. By way of comparison, I'd booked a single night in a different hotel for 160/ night, also excluding breakfast, on the east side of the city. The difference (for 45 euros!) was truly night and day. The Okura felt luxurious (and it was air conditioned! The other hotel was not), the staff was wonderful, and it was very easy to walk around from the hotel.

Sunday afternoon, I wandered towards Albert Cuypmarkt (closed Sundays) in search of food. I stopped by Mana Mana for an early dinner and the wild mushrooms with garlic was deliciously fresh. Topped off by an ice cream at Matcha Bar and a wander around the mostly-empty streets, I was ready to spend the evening chilling at the hotel gym & sauna.

Although work filled up the weekdays, we managed to participate in a few local activities, including:

Pouring our own beer, people-watching, and eating some really great food at Bierfabriek;
Getting up early to run around the Vondelpark;
Touring the city from below in a long, relaxing canal tour;
Spent a half-day volunteering at Stadsboerderij Osdorp weeding in the garden;
Grabbing a tasty pizza at Bardot and scouring for tourist junk at the Albert Cuypmarkt.

What a lovely trip, with the sun shining every day we were there, I can't wait to be back!

A Perfect Day Trip to Gdansk

2018-08-08T06:18:00.001-04:00

During our 10-day holiday to Poland, we escaped the hot beaches for a city day in Gdansk. What a lovely city! We explored the city on foot, wandering through the old town and a few key areas I'd earmarked for entertaining kids. Here's what we saw:

We arrived by train and walked about 10 minutes into the city center. Near the KFC at the train station, we found the underground tunnel to safely cross the busy main road. With our Lonely Planet in hand, we headed first to the Golden Gate, happening upon the lovely Millenium Tree on our way there.

The gate itself wasn't much to look at, but the Ulica Dluga was gorgeous. The history - and how it was completely rebuilt, stone by stone - was fascinating. We went on a perfectly sunny Tuesday, where it also happened that the Dom Uphagena was free that day.

After wandering inside to see how the wealthy lived, learning how the original items inside had been kept away but the original building destroyed & later rebuilt, we headed to a milkbar for a bite to eat. Lonely Planet recommended Neptun and it did not disappoint. Outdoor seating was perfect for people-watching and little-people running around, and the prices were right. Only thing - the staff spoke no English! Luckily we found someone friendly inside who offered to help us order, and we were soon filling up on sweet gnocchi, savory pancakes, and fried cod. Yum!

Following lunch, we obviously needed ice cream, and found a place right across from the Neptune Fountain. A few photos later, we wandered in the general direction of the Maritime Museum. But wait -- a giant ferris wheel beckoned first! It was definitely touristy but also my first time on a ferris wheel - the Amber Sky. We enjoyed some nice views of the city before wandering over to the museum we'd read so much about.

After all the hype, we enjoyed 2 solid hours at the Maritime Museum. It was a lot of fun for the kids, which made the day a little easier on the adults. We got tickets to the Cultural Center, including a 1-hour visit to the interactive play area. My 5-year old didn't leave the remote-controlled boat area, and the 2-year old had fun sailing, looking at maps, listening to different messaging sounds, building a boat, and dressing a pirate.

We left the museum in search of coffees (and kinder coffees, aka hot chocolates), and found what we needed at Cafe Kamienica on Ulica Mariacka, a very charming little cobblestone street. I bought some amber earrings, we listened to some lovely street performers on their wind instruments, and we successfully drank coffee before meandering back to the train station in search of strawberry pierogies and a train back to Sopot.

Tips for Visiting: Sopot, Baltic Sea, Poland

2018-08-04T07:42:00.005-04:00

Summer break! After weeks of feeling burned out at work and exhausted by hot, long summer days and 2 little boys with seemingly boundless energy, I was so looking forward to a break.

We flew to Gdansk for a 10-day summer break, starting with 5 days at the beach (Sopot) and 5 days in the city (Krakow - post to follow). Despite previous frustrations with airbnb, there was not much else to choose from for apartments in the area, so we were stuck with it. Furthermore, googling Sopot hadn't turned up much; it was a place you had to sort of figure out while you were there.

Good thing I'm here to help and share our 'lessons learned'...

General tips for Sopot:

Stay on the west side, as close to the beach as possible. It's much quieter, shadier, and kid-friendlier.

There's a huge beach playground and park playground, both on the west side of the Sheraton. This was a looooong walk from our airbnb.

Mix it up. We didn't want to spend every day at the beach, so we coordinated 2 day trips (Gdansk, Malbork) and 3 days at the beach.

There is so much to see nearby, and when well-planned, trains run really efficiently. More on each trip to come.

Book early! Or - pick a different place!

There are a number of holiday homes and hotels way closer to the beach vs where we stayed. We booked 2 months in advance, and could only find airbnb options - very little from vrbo, wimdu, or even hotels that was within our budget. Despite our expectations, this was not a cheap holiday.
If I were to do it all over again, I'd have stayed in Gdansk. We booked way too late to make the seaside stay worthwhile. After our stay here, I cannot believe that we paid 120 euros/night to stay at this place. The lack of value for price was unbelievable, considering we had picked Poland as a budget-friendly destination. I'm pretty sure I'd have done better on the French Riviera (oh yes, we did!!). Also, see #6 below, I wasn't a big fan of this part of the trip but tried to make the most of it. Travel is often fun, but sometimes very frustrating.

Watch the lifeguard flags! Or - plan to go when it's not crazy hot.

Since it's been so hot this summer, the bacteria in the Baltic Sea made it unsafe to swim. Frankly, this made a beach holiday pretty worthless- it was too hot to sit in the sun all day without an escape. Ice cream helped.

Book a place with a/c if you can find one -- or, a fan.

The one saving grace of our airbnb was the giant fan. It was still hot in the apartment, but a little more bearable thanks to air circulation.

Be prepared.

I found people in Sopot especially pushy and closed off. Where in Germany, we would gladly share toys and play space with other families, people on the beach and playgrounds were visibly annoyed that other people were near their (public) space - going so far as to put up fabric fences around their 'personal' (public!) beach space! It was also surprisingly tough to get by with English or German at restaurants and shops.

We did enjoy a few meals and activities, including the following:

Pierogis and savory pancakes with spinach & chia seeds (with mascarpone cream - yum! AND they had coloring books for kids!) at Gruszka & Pietruszka,
Mango lassis and (more) savory pancakes at Green Way,
Shopping for junk at the Flying Tiger,
Browsing for (but not buying) overpriced junk at the Sopot open-air market (seriously, lots of junk. Fun fact, the pearls are all from China),
Buying fruit-topped waffles everywhere,
Renting umbrellas on the beach (10 zl for a day), and
Renting kettcars next to Smak Morza for 15 zl / half hour.

There is easily enough to fill 3 days in Sopot at a slow pace. If I were to go back to the Baltic Sea, though, I'd pick the German side any day.

Furniture Store Daycare and Other Wonders

2018-06-25T16:42:00.001-04:00

After years of wanting to try it out, we finally got a taste of free furniture store daycare. It was magical! Kinderparadies at Moebel Martin in Mainz, conveniently located next to the cafe (we literally ran into friends from daycare whose grandparents brought the kids to play while they got a coffee), entertained Navin for a good 2+ hours.

As far as I'm aware, daycares at furnitures is not a thing in the US except for Ikea. But boy is it ever here. Ikea offers it, therefore so do all other furniture stores. Here's how it works:

Kids must be 3+.
There is a time limit - usually 2 hours.
Trained caregivers will watch your kids and even provide snacks / drinks.
You can bring house shoes for your kiddos - they likely won't be able to wear outside shoes in the play area.

That's pretty much it! The only disappointing part was that Nayan couldn't go too - but we will be going back when he turns 3 in a few months! The staff will call you once the time is up or if your child requests a pickup. Otherwise, you can actually shop (or just drink a coffee) in total peace.

What's also fun:

Family bathrooms are available with plenty of room for changing diapers - you're not restricted to the mens' or womens' bathrooms.
The cafe offers a kids' menu and often kid-friendly activities in the summertime outside.
In addition to shopping carts, strollers are available. Useful, because these stores are very large!

I love how truly kid-friendly everything is here. In our neighborhood, the kids are used to collecting free bread at the bakery, salami at the butcher, lollipops at the paper store, stickers at the grocery store... and sometimes even when it's just me, shopowners will send home goodies for the little guys. How lucky are they - and we - to live here!

You may also want to read all about going to the gym in Germany, here!

Just in Time for the World Cup - a World Cup Birthday Party!

2018-06-17T07:10:00.000-04:00

After what seems like no time at all, we have a 5 year old! It happened so fast, and he has become very opinionated lately. Especially when it came to birthday party planning. For the first time, he didn't want a pinata, but did want a World Cup theme. He also wanted a treasure hunt - this is really popular with the kids here and pretty much every party we attend has some kind of treasure hunt component. There's been a police-finding-a-robber hunt, a photo-based treasure hunt around the university, and (the coolest) a treasure hunt through the forest.

Naturally, we obliged. Google turned up a wonderful resource for themed birthday parties: Geburtstagsfee.de. We acquired plates, cups, balloons, trinkets for the goody bags, and (the most popular) cake decorations, all with a soccer theme. Navin helped me make his red velvet sheet cake - it tasted so good! One trick we learned was to use the red food coloring from the Asian grocery store (powder form) - the red color was much richer. We topped it with a sugar glazed soccer field, and it was a big hit.

Next up, the treasure hunt! I picked 6 clues from this treasure hunt template, translated them into German (sadly without the rhyming...), and came up with 6 activities at each clue that the kids would have to complete to 'earn' their next clue.

We played darts at one, bowled at another, did a ring toss, solved a riddle, and (my proudest), completed a homemade 'pin the soccer ball on the goal' game. Since it was hard to find a template for this online, I've shared the images we used. I ordered everything on posterxxl.de - 100x75 cm poster for the goal, and 13x18 for the soccer ball. We blindfolded the kids and used double stick tape to secure the soccer balls on the goal.

What fun! They found the treasure at the end, and Navin was so proud of himself and his friends for succeeding in their task.

As with the last treasure hunt, we only managed to fill one hour with the treasure hunt. These kids are so fast! Luckily we dug into the presents, found several new lego sets, and got to building. A few hours later, parents came to pick up some happy kids, and we could finally relax. Until the next one!

A Quick Overnight in London

2018-06-13T16:08:00.000-04:00

A perfect day in London. That was the plan, and we managed just about everything, even good weather, for a trip to see Hamilton and celebrate 10 years of marriage.

For the first time in a while, I successfully convinced S to plan everything well ahead of time. Well, except our flights - we ended up paying a bit more than expected since I waited until 6 weeks in advance to book... The theatre tickets were booked as soon as I found out (via Facebook) that they were released for the London show. When Harry & Meghan got engaged, I rushed to book the Taj St James Hotel near Buckingham Palace, and a convenient 7 minute walk to the theatre, just in case there was a rush on hotel bookings. Finally, for all I'd heard (and enjoyed for dinner) about Dishoom's breakfast, I booked a breakfast table for Saturday morning.

Day 1:

So our plans for Friday were set - after setting up our tag-team of babysitters and village of neighbors to look after the boys, dropping them off at daycare and leaving the car for pickup by sitter #1, we headed out to catch our flight to Heathrow! We napped on the plane, enjoyed not having to entertain kids (first trip since the older one was born. Woah), and landed to face an insane, hour-long security queue at Heathrow. No surprise, I guess. Another lesson: during rush hour, save some cash and take the tube rather than Heathrow Express. I wish I'd checked the times before buying the ticket! About two hours later we arrived at the hotel to an upgraded room at the Taj. The hotel was really lovely, rooms perfect, and service excellent. We headed out to see the show with an hour to find our seats and wander around the theatre with glasses of wine. I loved how they let ticketholders go exploring in different seating areas - it was neat to check out the stage from all possible views before settling down into our seats for the truly amazing show.

Dinner was underwhelming at Millbank Spice but hey, it was food, and it was open past 10:30, so we were happy to eat something!

Day 2:
I wish we'd booked breakfast at the Taj instead of Dishoom - it was a trek to get to Covent Garden from there in time for our reservation and the hotel restaurant smelled great. Nevertheless, we hired bikes for the day - there was a station around the corner and getting the app to find empty stations near Dishoom was ultra-easy. And we headed off through the crowded morning streets of London.

The restaurant didn't fill up until after 10, so we had our fill of chai, naan wraps, and people-watching before we headed back to the hotel, once again on the bike. Thanks to the Westminster Mile, much of our planned route was closed off to bikes or entirely, so we took a very circuitous route to the hotel. When we finally got back, we had an hour pack up, clean up, check out... and then head to the lobby for a beer break (as one should do when on holiday without kids). We decided to hop on a city bus to buy tourist junk and wander through Piccadilly Circus. What should have taken 15 minutes took nearly 45... we quickly realized that on any given weekend, London seems to have events and crowds in nearly every corner of the city. Especially during summer break. Anyway, it was a comfortable ride and conveniently straight to Uniqlo. A bit of shopping later, we wandered to some tourist shops, walked our way through Chinatown, and had a bit of lunch at Cay Tre.

We had to catch the Stansted Express shortly after, so we caught the tube to Liverpool Station, found a pub for a quick beer and bite, and caught a train to Stansted (and a nap) before our flight home. I have to say, Stansted is quite a nice airport with loads of eating options. Our flight was very delayed, so we had time to browse... I was glad to see it wasn't as sparse as Hahn airport for window shopping possibilities.

After landing safely in Frankfurt, and catching a train & taxi home, we hit the hay ahead of a busy Sunday back with the kids. Boy was it a nice break, though!

Three Disappointing Days in Stuttgart

2018-05-24T03:57:00.000-04:00

Not every traveling experience is perfect, and traveling with young kids can be especially challenging. Stuttgart brought out more than the usual challenges for me.

Although we spent 3 days in the city, we could have spent 1 and returned home via the comfortable train. That's because my biggest takeaway was that hotels in Stuttgart are expensive! I looked for a while before settling on the Hotel Unger - mostly for location, breakfast, and the four-star rating. At 161 euros / night, it wasn't exactly cheap. Although the staff and breakfast were great, it was more in line with a 2-star Ibis hotel in any other city - older interior, poor ventilation in the rooms (and importantly, no air conditioning until the outside temp was 24C. I was melting at night), and near a bar which got very noisy between 12-4 am. Our experience at the Ibis Styles in Nice (still my favorite) far outranked this one, at nearly half the cost - in Nice, no less! Our friends stayed at the Schlossgarten hotel, and we briefly considered the Steigenberger, but their breakfast prices were out of control. And, well, kids + hotel breakfast (usually) = relaxed parents. Unless those parents didn't sleep all night.

I digress. In short, our hotel experience in Stuttgart left (much) room for improvement. Here's how we spent our time in the city:

Day 1:
Wandered around the old town. I made it to Uniqlo and Zara, only to find the kids' and womens' workwear section of Uniqlo were minimal here. Zara, happily, had a great sale in the kids' department. This part of Stuttgart was exactly like the Zeil in Frankfurt. Lots of shopping, not much character. Cafes abound, charging 4 euro for coffee and 3.60 for a beer - that is to say, Frankfurt-level pricing.

Dinner was at Vapiano, which is normally a go-to for fast-casual, kid-friendly dining. Not here. The pasta lines barely moved, taking 15 minutes per order. We waited 50 minutes for a bowl of pesto pasta. The kids (and adults) were all cranky by the end.

Day 1 impression of Stuttgart: it's a place to wait in line, and spend more money than you planned on.

Day 2:
The main plan was to hit the zoo, but not before wandering a Sunday flea market that took over the old town. This was pretty neat - lots of stands, food trucks too, and not super crowded around 9 am. We hopped on a tram to the zoo for the rest of the day.

The Zoo was easy to get to by tram, and huge. Downside - it costs 16 euro per adult to enter. Thanks for making me miss DC, Stuttgart, where the zoo is free and just as good! Anyway, we followed the elephant path and the kids had a blast seeing the animals, especially the lions (at lunch!), monkeys, and fish. The dining options were pretty rough, heavy on the meat and potatoes and once again, overpriced. We didn't make it the whole way through, instead cutting out at Rosenstein to rest at the hotel before dinner at Carl's Brauhaus.

Carl's was solid for a Swabian meal, once again heavy on the meat and potatoes. It was the perfect volume (loud) for covering up the tantrums of a few tired children. Good beer selection as well.

Day 2 impression of Stuttgart: this city is crowded!

Day 3:
We spent day 3 trying to get to the Mercedes museum, failing (note: do NOT attempt to get there via the Blick tram stop, and also the holiday S6 schedule is really terrible), and crossing the whole city to get to the Porsche museum instead. I had to wonder whether Mr. Benz, Mr. Daimler, or Mr. Porsche (or all three) set up an anti-transit conspiracy in Stuttgart. It is remarkably difficult to get around by transit, considering how large of a city it is.

So, the Porsche museum it was, but not before lunch at the Boxenstopp Cafe outside. The menu was healthy and kid-friendly, and after eating we headed up to see the cars. The museum was neat, but I was expecting more interactive areas for kids (based on pre-reading). There wasn't much beyond a simulator (aka video game) and a bunch of buttons to press and make horns honk and engines roar. Whoopty doo. I did get a pic of the kiddos in a Porsche, but I could do that at a car dealership if I really wanted to, right? This is all to say, if you're not really into cars, this isn't worth a stop. I'm not really into cars, but it did pass the morning.

We spent the afternoon at the Schlossgarten Biergarten, where they had a live band, lots of people dancing, a pretty nifty playground, and a lot of green space to sit on surrounding it.

The kids wore themselves out just in time for the train ride home - which couldn't have come soon enough. One major upside of the hotel breakfast was the ability to snag a few mini champagne bottles to go.

If I enjoyed one thing during our three day trip, it was watching the boys climb all over their seats on the train while enjoying my mini champagne.

Day 3 / overall impression of Stuttgart: I'm grateful I live in Mainz!

At the Gym in Germany

2018-05-03T07:49:00.000-04:00

One of the first things I do when I move somewhere, is find a gym. Even though I've never been one to make friends with people I meet through the gym, it somehow feels familiar, and helps me get into my familiar routine of being able to regularly work out, no matter the weather.

When I moved to San Francisco 14 years ago, as an AmeriCorps volunteer on an extremely tight budget, I did monthly trials for nearly every gym in the city (this could warrant its own blog post). No matter the neighborhood - if I could take a bus there, I would try it out for a month. It worked for a while, until I eventually convinced my boyfriend (now husband) to sponsor membership to a place near my apartment until I could afford it myself. What a guy.

Flash forward to moving to Mainz, and I learned my company had a fitness reimbursement plan and discounts already available, with Fitness First. There was one within running / bus distance to our flat, so I tried it out and quickly signed a contract. At the time, it was one of a few shops in town - I also signed up for the premium plan, which (optimistically for me) allowed me access to all of their clubs across Germany. I never really used this, and have since downgraded the plan to only one club, only entry before 16:00 daily. I've also since purchased a 10-punch card for a gym near my house, with a parking lot & better hours. At 15 euros / workout though, it isn't cheap.

Here are 6 things I've learned about fitness studios here, some of which surprised me and some aspects that weren't so different from home:

1. You'll need to sign a contract. In my experience, the terms can be changed (negotiating the price, adding on premiums) at any time but to cancel, you need to provide 3 months' advance written notice. Sport Treff and some other gyms now offer punch cards (no contract!) but it will definitely cost more per-workout.

2. Most often, childcare is included - no additional cost! Although my kids swiftly rejected me leaving them in gym childcare (I've rarely heard of friends having good experiences with this, although other gym-goers I've seen manage ok), it's a fantastic option to have.

3. There's usually a sauna in the back. Not that I ever leave time to use it, but it's nice that it's there & feels very luxurious if I do take 5 minutes to use it.

4. Community showers for women. This was new for me and I took a long time to get used to the open-ness. Now (I think also post-babies) I just don't have the time to bother caring, but I do miss having a little more privacy.

5. Working out itself is the same - machines, weights, classes, etc. Maybe that's why I love the familiarity aspect so much. Although I haven't seen perks like towel service or the latest hot workout course available in our clubs, the basics are always there and instructors are always good.

6. When women walk into the locker room, they say hi to the room and bye when they leave. It's a really nice gesture and happens in the doctor's office waiting rooms too. Just a quick 'Guten Tag' or a 'Ciao', and then on your way.

A Perfect Easter Break in the Black Forest

2018-04-15T15:51:00.000-04:00

The streak of travel continues! Although we hadn't planned our Easter trip until the very last minute (just 2 weeks before), we managed to hook up with friends living in Lausanne to meet in the middle of the Black Forest, which was also right in the middle of our two cities. We booked a bauernhof urlaub - our second attempt at a farmstay holiday - just outside the town of Wolfach.

I would say the two best lessons learned were (1) book early for the best price on accommodation and food. We definitely overpaid due to late booking, and could have probably negotiated a better price on meals; and (2) have a backup plan for bad weather. We had a full rainy/gray day and could only find outdoor or open-air activities nearby. Luckily the other days were sunny and warm-ish, but alternate options would have been good. Oh yeah and (3) when hiking to a vesperstube, make sure they're open! We walked for over an hour up a steep hill to one, only to discover they were closed. We were starving, so it was an enormous disappointment - there wasn't even a 'closed' sign at the restaurant!

ANYway, focusing on the positives: we were walking distance to trails, had access to farm animals (the kids really loved feeding the cows and petting the donkeys. And man are donkeys loud!), and there was a lovely playground around the corner. The farmstay had also organized an Easter fire and an egg hunt on Easter Sunday, which was a nice way to spend the holiday. Because we had a kitchen (we rented the 2-bedroom apartment), I packed a bag and planned most of our meals, and (luckily) included shower stuff as well. Turns out that was wise, because that wasn't included (along with dishwasher tabs and extra trash bags). Good thing we came with the car, because we definitely filled up the trunk!

If I did it again, I'd try to stay closer to Gutach, where there were a few more activities and people around, including a few we enjoyed over our last 2 days there. There looked like endless options for holiday homes around there, as well as hotels. It was nice to really be 'away from it all' at our hof, though.

Day 1:
The first activity day, we went to the open air Black Forest museum. I would strongly recommend avoiding the restaurant - the food was adequate but the service was beyond atrocious. It was so slow that a lot of people just left money on the table rather than waiting to pay their bill!

Anyway, the upsides were many. There was too much to see in one day, so we picked the 'kid-friendly' huts and went exploring. Since it was Easter weekend, the kids painted wooden eggs and cuddled with baby chicks. Then, we wandered from hut to hut to explore how families lived, worked, played, and ate, before they had the luxuries we have today (you know, like electricity). It was all so well explained and organized - we felt like we all learned something new. And, the kids all took fantastic car naps so we definitely succeeded in wearing them out!

The parents had booked the on-site sauna for the evening, so after the kids went to bed, we grabbed a chilled bottle of champagne and wound down in a very warm and relaxing sauna for 2 and a half hours. Definitely nice to have a bit of luxury in the forest.

Day 2:
We visited a Motorrad Museum in Oberwolfach - which turned out to be an overpriced showcase of a bunch of (beautiful, but old) motorcycles. There was no story, history, or educational component - just a literal stage for looking at motorcycles. At 3 euro per visitor, it's one to skip.

We next went to the sommerrodelbahn in Gutach, which was a completely awesome tourist trap. The track is about 1 km and just the right amount of fun for us and the 4-year old (the 2 year old was too young to try it), the biergarten is right in the sun, and there's a (small, but passable) playground just behind. The line moved quickly, 'driving' was very intuitive, and it was just high and curvy enough to be fun, not scary.

Day 3:
We packed up in the morning after breakfast and headed out to the Alternative Wolf and Bear park about 12 minutes down the road. Hungry, we stopped first at the snack bar for delicious veggie sandwiches and bratwursts. Good call, because the place filled up at 12 o'clock.

We skipped the playground and teepees in favor of the 'rundweg' - about a 2 km circuit that we weren't sure the kids would last on, but we went forward anyway. Turns out all that Olympic watching was for good - they raced in front of us to "win" gold or silver medals, and made it all the way through without needing to be carried. We got very close up to the wolves and bears - they were lounging in the sun and wandering about with no worries about people watching them. The kids even got to see some bear growling at a wolf pack action - nothing like nature in real life!

We got back to the car just in time for naptime / afternoon exhaustion, and headed back to Mainz. My phone / google maps lost the GPS connection (oops, we forgot to download the offline map! Rookie mistake), so I went up a mountain where I meant to go down. Downside: a much longer route. Upside: while the kids snoozed (for 3 hours!), I took in majestic views at the top, and even saw several feet of snow! Definitely glad we got lost, even though it was spooky to go many miles without seeing any other cars on the road. Three hours later, it was home sweet home to the real world. And it took coming home to realize how relaxed I was from the time 'away from it all'. Definitely a vacation well spent.

2 Perfect Days in Lisbon

2018-04-06T16:20:00.001-04:00

It's rare that I travel for work, so it's always extra exciting to get a few days away on my own. Unfortunately, I caught the flu during my much-anticipated Munich trip (meant to be 3 days), and so did my youngest. After miserably attending a presentation for half a day, giving up and going back home a day early (which led to a different fiasco thanks to Deutsche Bahn, involving being stuck at Frankfurt central station at 1 am. Which is typically a less than ideal place to be after dark... and taking a pretty expensive taxi ride home from there... ), I was far too excited about my recent 3-day trip planned to Lisbon for a team offsite.

I knew most of the days would be spent in a conference room at the lovely Hotel Tivoli, but we were able to carve out time to see many of the city sights. The hotel was a bit of a walk to many touristy sights, but fortunately Uber is all over Lisbon to save the day (and legs).

Day 1:
The first day, our group did an organized scavenger hunt during which we saw most of the city sights. We walked about 12k, raced from miradouro to statue and back again, and enjoyed a beer in the sun in the middle. The weather could not have been better, and it stayed that way throughout the week. The upside of running around the city was spotting places I planned to return to when I had more time.

After a short break at the hotel, we walked up an extremely steep hill to the delicious (and deceptively huge inside) Pateo do Bairro do Avillez restaurant for Portugese food. The cod (and the 'exploding olives' cod) dishes were great, and it was reasonably priced for the amount of food and wine we consumed.

Day 2/3:
The next day was mostly spent inside a conference room, with the occasional breath of fresh sunny air between meetings. Luckily we finished early, so I scooted out for 2 hours of wandering past the Monument to the Great War Dead, for shopping at Lojo Real and Embaixada for "local" products (I ended up buying a pair of Italian made sunglasses. Hey, at least it's still made within the EU!), walking down to the Elevador de Santa Justa, and people watching along the barrio alto on my way back up the extremely steep hill to the Tivoli. Dinner that night and breakfast the next day were at the hotel, but we finished up in time for another several-hour wander on the last day.

I headed out by taxi to make sure I got to the Miradouro da Santa Luiza, one of my favorite spots from the scavenger hunt. After taking time to really soak in the view, the plaza, the street art, and the luxury of peace while I traveled, I wandered up a small alley towards the Sao George Castle. I didn't go inside, choosing to wander around in search of the Miradouro da Graca and Igreja nearby. I almost didn't venture up the steep hill, but was so happy when I got to the top. The castle view was perfect, and the convent/ church next door was beautiful and well-organized. It was really neat to learn about the history of Portugese missionaries; although I have mixed feelings about their former empire, the stories were honestly and succinctly told.

I wandered back in search of a few touristy items - cork bag (check), shoes (check), and hotel for a bit of rest / iPhone charging before catching an Uber to the airport.

Having loved Porto, I found Lisbon a lot more challenging to explore. Hills are steeper, the city is larger, and there are tourists everywhere. I enjoyed exploring one pocket of a city at a time, but I can't imagine traveling there with little kids - the narrow sidewalks, cobblestones everywhere, and endless walking would just be exhausting. Luckily, I could wander at my leisure - and I soaked in every moment!

If you liked this post, you might like reading on about our visit to Porto!

A Perfect Overnight in Heidelberg

2018-03-30T03:22:00.001-04:00

After a bit of a travel break, I'm back! We went to Heidelberg (again) for an overnight with the visiting grandparents, and had a lovely time in the very walkable Alstadt.

We stayed at the Gasthaus Hotel Backmulde, in the heart of town, after a short drive over from Mainz. Although the hotel has (limited) parking, P8 is just a few blocks away and very reasonable at 17 euros / day. They even have family parking right by the elevator! We loved the little hotel - the three-bed and two-bed rooms (16 and 18) were very spacious, breakfast was perfect, and we could easily explore the city just by walking around the corner.

We started with quiches, grilled sheep's cheese with veggies, and tea and cake at the lovely Cafe Schafheutle. The garden seating was covered and warm, and the lively atmosphere and friendly waitstaff made it easy to stay and thoroughly enjoy our lunch. We continued to wander, mostly popping in and out of shops, finding a collection of unique items at the GOODsHOUSE shop. There was so much to look around that I went back for a second look (and bought a cool soccer-player clock, an Austrian-made milk pot, and several Green Toys). The vast pedestrian-only zone was ideal for kids, and wandering the alleys, we often stumbled across beautiful historic buildings along the way.

Dinner was tasty, if not greasy, at Adelita's for Mexican food. A huge table in the back, quesadillas and fries for the kids, margaritas for the adults, and (bonus!) they even had a diaper changing table that was accessible to all (e.g., not confined to the women's restroom, as they too often are). It's the little things.

The next morning, we walked over to P12, the Bergbahn starting point. I found the pricing a little confusing, but it turned out to just go to the castle, there was only a child discount (kids under 6 free, woo hoo!), not a senior discount. For 7 euros per adult then, we got return tickets plus castle entry. Heidelberg castle is a bit funny in that it's more ruins than full-on castle, so there isn't a ton to see inside the castle walls. The grounds, viewpoints, and walking paths, however, are really lovely and worth spending a few hours.

We were a bit time-restricted due to a kids' birthday party, so we headed back fairly quickly, wandered through the Old Bridge (once again, pedestrian only) on the walk back, picked up the car, and made our way back to Mainz. All in all, it's the perfect city for a quick overnight stop and very family friendly.

If you liked this, you may like to learn about visiting the Alsace region!

Shoe Shopping in Germany

2018-03-15T12:13:00.001-04:00

When I told my mom I was moving to Germany, one of the first things she said was to keep an eye out for Gabor shoes. Although I have no idea how she knew about the brand, it was further proof that she knows a lot more than I do about shopping.

Thus began my education into the world of German-made shoes. There are a lot of well-made shoes here, under a number of different brands, and I've finally made sense of what styles suit mine - and price areas. There are also a million shoe shops, but also zalando and mirapodo for online shoppers like myself, both with an inclination to send discount codes regularly.

One of the best lessons I've learned about shoes here - is side zippers! I still don't see this elsewhere, but a lot of shoes have laces and side zippers - it makes getting shoes on and off worlds easier! It also looks pretty stylish.

It can be hard to sort out which brands are worth the prices, so enjoy my guide below --

Caprice - slogan, "walking on air". I really like these shoes for their price/ performance ratio and they always look good when I wear them to work. My leather Caprice boots and booties have kept up over 3 years and counting here, and I'm always happy with the comfort level when I walk around all day long in them.
Gabor - they can be pricey, but they are really well made. Mom knew what she was talking about! Styles can be a bit bland, but they are perfect for a conservative office environment, and the shoes last.
Rieker - leather Rieker shoes are great and almost always have a zipper. Non-leather quality can be hit or miss, but they are always well-priced and usually styled well.
Ecco - These are Danish, but I love my Eccos. They can also be pricey, but walking around in my worn-in Ecco sneakers is like walking on air.
Josef Seibel - I have a pair of booties that were pricey, and don't have a zipper, but I absolutely love them for style, comfort, and warmth. They're extremely well made and great for the office.
Legero - Great for comfort, and nice price / performance ratio. I really like these shoes for wearing around town and they are made to last.

I've also tried and been disappointed by a couple of shoe brands, including Esprit, Tommy Hilfiger (I know, why did I even bother!), and Mark Adam. This is just based on my experience - I walk a lot, prefer simple / basic styles and solid colors, and prefer to buy shoes that will last a long time. I hope you find this short guide helpful!

This post contains affiliate links. For more information, please see the Disclosures page. If you liked this post, you might also like learning about shopping in Germany!