COZY LITTLE HOUSE

In Need Of A Rainbow

2012-02-10T16:02:00.000-06:00

Yesterday was grocery buying, bank depositing, and hair cutting day. All of which I can do in the same shopping strip in one shot.

Immediately when I walk in the door to the grocery store, flowers beckon. I am drawn to the colorful displays like bees to honey.

I tell myself to go on over to the bananas nearby. But I am stuck in place. Bananas, I reluctantly tell myself, you can eat. Flowers you cannot.

Still, I'm rooted to the floor with the array of beauty beckoning to me like a rainbow after a storm.

I pick a bouquet up, then put it back. It has been a particularly tough week, worrying about the recent news that my ex may possibly lose his job. For there goes my current income as well.

I'm saving as much as I can. But I need more time to build a nest egg while I receive this money from him.

I have tried to be upbeat since my move here. I told myself that if I kept saying I would be able to glide over the rough, choppy seas, and smiled while saying it, it would somehow transpire.

The fact is, everything that has happened didn't just go poof! And magically disappear. There are still many land mines in my head that I deal with every day. That trigger other things that haven't been properly dealt with.

So all is not roses. And I'm saying this now because I don't want to give anyone else who's been in my situation some sense of false hope. That you will leave behind what happened in that other place when you leave town. That the miles will dispel all the hurt and anxiety and disappointment.

A mere move to another place does not make the stuff in your head evaporate. Nor can you leave it behind like a box filled with memories you don't care to take with you.

But, I tell myself as other women congregate beside me, obviously equally drawn to the flower displays, Valentine's Day is right around the corner. And my birthday five days after that...

I have spent the week in a perpetual state of worry over things I have no control of. Just like so many other folks out there worrying they won't be able to keep their homes in hard times.

I have come to the conclusion that I can never afford to buy this house. If something happens in the near future, my choices will be limited. So I tell myself, don't allow yourself to love it too much.

But if I have enough time to save and build my savings account, maybe I could buy one of those tiny houses on wheels. Or an older mobile home, or some other living quarters that might be within my budget.

Life is really just a series of changes. Nothing stays the same. I have moved so many times I don't even want to count. Why is a home always so elusive for me, I ask myself in the dead of night, staring at the dark ceiling?

Why do I keep letting myself love a home, when something always seems to happen and I have to leave it?

Maybe that's just the way of things in life. That what you yearn for the most is the hardest to grab onto.

Obviously before I pick out bananas, I get what I can grasp of my rainbow, and stick it in the grocery cart.

I tell myself it is tangible proof that miracles do happen.

Welcome Wagon Friday 2/10/12

2012-02-10T09:25:00.000-06:00

It's that time of the week again. The day we welcome new bloggers. Up for you this week I have...

La Belle Epoque Home...

Oh, how I'd love to have one of those in my sewing area!

Beaux R'eves...

Love that pillow! And the girl knows how to layer.

Bliss Ranch...

Don't you love the above photo? The effects are dazzling. And oh, I'd love to have that wire basket for a shelf in my bathroom!

Take some time and fix some hot tea or coffee. Sit a spell on this wintry February day, and visit these gals. I'm sure they will appreciate it.

Thrifty Living 2012: Frugal Entertaining Ideas

2012-02-09T08:34:00.001-06:00

Today the Frugal Five are sharing their ideas for frugal ways for entertainment. It's pretty easy for me, because I'm easily entertained!

Please go over and visit
Claudia
Elaine
Jen
Diane

I'm not much of a TV-watcher. I just don't care for the line-up of shows the past few years. I'd rather get out my laptop, sit in my comfy chair with the dogs and an afghan spread over us, and read blogs. Now that's fine entertainment to me!

Movies, books and such are always available at your local library. I made use of the library the whole time my kids were growing up. I loved going there and being in a quiet place. And taking my kids for story time.

I adore books. I very rarely buy them. It's easy enough to sign up to review them for book publishers and book review sites. That way you get your book free. And then you can pass it along to your friends or family.

I enjoy the outdoors immensely. Walking and taking photos is high entertainment for me. With cropping, sometimes I can get two or three photos cropped from just one. Whether it be birds or trees or just something that catches my fancy, I'm quick to raise my camera to catch a quick snapshot.

When I'm feeling particularly inspired, I use a little gas and take a drive in the country. I love taking photos of old barns and livestock. But I'm very conscious of gas prices, so it's not as often these days.

I love rearranging vignettes. I can while away hours moving things about and achieving a new and fresh look in my rooms.

I love sewing. So sitting down at my 1947 Featherweight Singer and creating something new is fun for me.

I keep favorite magazines around to inspire me. Sometimes when the stack starts getting high, I'll tear pages out and put them in notebooks so I have more of what I love to look at in one easy place to find it.

In warm weather, I like to create fairy gardens. You can do this in containers big and small. It's fun to get the grandkids involved as well. Make up stories about your little fairy world.

Sometimes all it takes is lighting a candle, putting something sweet like a pan of brownies in the oven, and sitting down with a cup of coffee. I look about me and realize that my home is my favorite form of entertainment.

Candle Warmth

2012-02-08T15:01:00.000-06:00

It's been another cold wintry day. So dark I lit the candles to feel a bit of coziness.

I guess we just equate candles with warmth. With home and hearth.

One of these days I am going to learn to make candles. And soap. Always wanted to learn that as well.

Maybe pick up some yeast and ingredients for bread and fill the house with the unparalleled aroma of baking bread. Nothing better. Cut a slice, smear on some butter. Melt in your mouth good.

While the gray days continue. One moving right along after another. Barren winter branches, stark and looking forlorn.

Gnarled and twisted into scattered patterns against the sky.

But it's nice and toasty in here. My steady and loyal companions are with me. And that is contentment.

Adorning Walls

2012-02-07T07:39:00.000-06:00

Today in our Defending The Small House series, Claudia and I are talking about walls. What we put on them, how we choose to decorate them.

I could never be accused of putting too little on my walls. Whether I have had a large home or a tiny home, my walls have always been filled with things I love to gaze at. It is merely my nature.

Tip#1: Inspiration boards are easy to make and usually cheap. They provide constant inspiration. And you can change them up whenever you please for a different look.

You will see quilts on my walls.

Tip#2: If you have a pretty quilt folded up and stuck in a chest somewhere, bring it out to enjoy.

Often you may see themes congregated on walls.

But they might seem a little cock-eyed! Here the theme could be considered nautical. After all, there is a Monet (fake of course) on the wall depicting a sea scene.

And to add to that, I hot-glued seashells on old washboards I've been collecting for years.

I know, a little bit strange, I must admit...but I like it!

Tip#3: If you want to hot-glue seashells on washboards, or whatever you want, don't be afraid to just do it. You live in your home. You have to look at your walls every day. There are no rules!

And then of course there is the collage windowpane I decorated and hung on the wall.

Tip#4: A frame doesn't have to go around a painting. You can add a frame you like to most anything to give it a bit of presence. To accentuate the piece.

I hung a clock in the living room. Then added, on a whim, a dark red frame I had.

You can decorate with sets of things. Or you can mix it up.

I like plates on walls. These two below were eBay wins. I think plates look great on any wall in your home.

Tip#5: Plates can be a cheap source of wall art. And the roundness breaks up the square look you normally see on walls, such as paintings.

It's nice when you have a piece of furniture you just couldn't live without. And can add collections of dishes and such to liven up that wall. No need to think about what to put on this wall!

This wall below has an adornment that is utilitarian and serves a purpose.

Tip#6: Even if you're putting something on the wall to serve a purpose, decorate around or inside it just for fun. Utilitarian doesn't have to be boring.

There is no rhyme or reason as to what you can or cannot put on your walls. It is simply objective. Whatever pleases you is the recipe.

Tip#7: Ultimately, the beauty of what should be on walls is really just in the eye of the beholder.

Here's a few more tips if you don't have much money in the budget for things to put on your walls:

1. Buy a pretty calendar this year with pages you'd love to frame when the year is over.

2. Get some of those embroidery hoops at the craft store. They're real cheap. And put some lovely fabric inside to hang up. Put them in groupings.

3. If you have an old gate, iron or wood, you might consider hanging that up. Put a wreath on it. Decorate it as you wish for the seasons.

4. Take an empty frame and put a collage of things you love inside it.

5. Copy some favorite quotes, print them out in a large font, and frame them.

Over and out from 1010 square feet in the little blue house in Tulsa. Now head over to Claudia and Don's house in New York to see her ideas for walls.

Dogs, Sewing & Monday Nonsense

2012-02-06T12:19:00.000-06:00

The sun is shining today. Don't know if I could have taken yet another gray day. Sunshine, so vital to our mental health.

A day of sunny dispositions and reflection.

More sewing on the agenda. I hope.

Seems that February is whizzing by so fast.

What do you think Charlie Ross? Ready for spring?

I took down the drapes. The dogs kept barking at the college kids' vehicles that they park in front of my house. For some odd reason, their empty driveway does not prompt them to park there...

And then I had to get another sound machine from Bed, Bath & Beyond to put in here. So the dogs could not hear them as well, when they're standing outside talking to the many people that visit there.

Took these curtains I'd made out of the office/craft room and put them in here. Hoping the dogs would not know their cars were parked in front.

Oh, if only we could pick our neighbors...

Abi is remaining on guard for any activity.

Tomorrow Claudia and I have our monthly Small House series. We will be talking about decorating walls.

Meet Ms. Dottie

2012-02-05T17:21:00.002-06:00

This is what I've spent my day doing. Creating Ms. Dottie. I'm tired. Hence the name. It's not very original. She has polka dots and she's Dottie.

Here's how she began...

This is not rocket science. You simply take a pencil to muslin and draw a head with a body, arms, and legs.

Then after awhile she looked like this. Pardon her nudity. As you can see the room is a mess while I'm working on something.

Then I grab some fabrics and start making her something to wear. I simply draw a dress and cut it out.

And before you know it she has an apron. Red buttons on her feet (don't ask me why), and blush on her cheeks. Then black embroidery thread for her eyes and hair.

I used what I had on hand.

There's no going out in the car right now. It's being hijacked inside the little blue garage. I misplaced the garage door opener days ago. There's no other way to gain entry.

Yesterday evening I found the opener. I'd somehow left it outside on the top of the trash can. It had rained on it all night. And it will not work.

A good thing I'm a homebody. This is a good way to save on gas, my friends. Let your car get trapped in the garage!

I Hear A Symphony

2012-02-04T17:18:00.001-06:00

Today is the flat somber gray of typical winter days. One day in a monotony of many. In a season of volatile winds, and often a decline of one's spirit.

Until spring comes tiptoeing in, hesitant. At first so unsure of its presence.

My youngest daughter and I had lunch, which we often do on Saturdays. And ran a couple of errands.

Then commenced a lesson in record keeping and checkbook management from my 33 year old daughter. Who possesses a Masters degree in things that look like gobbledy-gook to me. Which means numbers.

I am not at all gifted in what to me is a paradox of endless numbers. I can clearly recall being in first grade, and knowing from the get-go that numbers would somehow be my nemesis. Somehow a list of numbers never made sense, all lined up in their perfect symmetry. They mocked me in their rigid stance.

My dear late friend Charlyce, a college professor, use to tell me that creativity is the highest form of intelligence.

Sounded good. But then what do you do about the parts of your life that have $ signs in front of them? There are ? signs that I'm sure light up in my head anytime I am faced with $ signs that...oh sigh, must somehow be dealt with.

My daughter has always told me that she loves math because there is always a true and exact answer. One that cannot be debated. She can lean over ledgers with $ signs attached to them for hours and not lose her sanity.

Me, I'd probably be torn between tearing off my toe nails. Or barring that, pulling out my hair. One graying strand at a time.

I can sit down and make up a pattern for a doll, let's say, sewing happily as I go. And my brain is not taxed by this effort.

Hand me a checkbook and a calculator (yes, she made me buy one today), and I want to curl up in a fetal position. Covering my head until the numbers have been dealt with (hopefully by someone else), and jauntily march off like soldiers.

I am encapsulated in a world that involves words. Words swim in my head happily. They seem to form sentences of their own volition, without any real effort on my part.

They flow in a seemingly never-ending ocean. Waves of words bob gently across the surface as far out as I can see.

I love words.

As a child, I enjoyed writing down words I'd find in the dictionary. While other children were outside climbing trees and running with abandon, I was inside with a notebook and pencil.

Words running up both sides of a page. I would choose a word at random, and sound it out as I so carefully wrote it down alongside its definition.

Words make sense to me. They insulate me.

In an often "senseless" world that surrounds me, words still come to my rescue. They provide a port in the storm.

I write down my feelings and thoughts. And after the period at the end of the last sentence, I have found a certain sense of security.

I am soothed by the outpouring of words that I equate with rationale. When I am happy, I feel the need to write. When I feel angst, I also need this outlet.

But $ signs make me feel resigned to squeezing the square form that is me into this impossible round shape that is constricting and claustrophobic.

The very same ones that my daughter depends on to keep her world tilted so perfectly on its axis. I find ornery and irascible. Defenseless and unarmed in front of a bucket of slithering snakes that form $ signs.

Give me similes and I possess poetry. It is music in my ears, silent but intoxicating. Like love, it is a many-splendored thing.

"Just as my fingers on these keys
Make music
So the self-same sounds
On my spirit
Make a music too..." (Wallace Stevens)

Words. Just words. Make my world make sense. Even if it's a symphony only I can hear.

It's A Colorful World

2012-02-03T16:59:00.001-06:00

I've got my pillow-making mojo back again. Here's some of them stacked on the decoupaged school desk. (I've been stacking them there for lack of a better place. Running out of room where I sew.)

You know, I just live in a colorful world. Don't know what I'd do if color should ever leave my world...

I remember one day a few years back, walking up to a garage sale. All the way from my car, I could see these brightly colored kitchen canisters. I couldn't get there and hand her my $5 fast enough!

Trying, trying to get inventory ready for the Etsy shop.

And I'll have you know, it will be filled to the brim with color! You may need your sunglasses on.

Welcome Wagon Friday 2/3/12

2012-02-03T10:13:00.000-06:00

It's time to welcome some new bloggers. Up for you this week I have...

Picket Fence Fancy is a blogger from the South Coast, NSW, Australia. Here's a look...

Love those scales!

Coastal Cottage Dreams just recently moved to a small town on the coast of South Carolina...

And I love her collection of driftwood.

The Rusty Hinge is Maria's blog...

Love her linens!

Please find time to wander on over and welcome these new bloggers.

Thrifty Living 2012: Saving Money On Gasoline Usage

2012-02-02T08:35:00.001-06:00

This is my SUV inside my tiny garage.

Is it an economical ride? No. But it is the car I got in the divorce. And I'm not the one paying it off. So it's my drive for a good long while

It is, to be exact, a 2006 Nissan 4-wheel drive Pathfinder. I have under 36,000 miles on this car. To say it is not driven much is an understatement.

I am, after all, a true homebody.

Would I choose a more economical vehicle if I were buying one today? Absolutely. But this is the car I have. And this is the car I have to find economical ways to drive.

My main way to do this is not to get out often. I go out a couple of times per week. I generally go to the grocery store once per week. Every other week, I stock up. The next week is more for perishables.

My bank is in the same shopping center as the grocery store. And the grocery store is right next to Target.

So my general plan is to wait, if I can, until I need to go to the bank to make a deposit. Then I will go to Target about once per month to get items that are cheaper there than they are at the grocery store. Then I head to the grocery for fruit and such.

This route is probably within two miles of my house. So I'm not using a lot of gas to get there.

I've researched some ways to cut down on fuel costs.

What are some ways to cut down on fuel costs?

1. Don't speed up fast when the light turns green. Accelerate slowly when starting up from a dead stop. Don't push the pedal down more than 1/4 of the total foot travel. This allows the carburetor to function at peak efficiency.

2. Buy gasoline during the coolest part of the day. During these times, gasoline is densest. Keep in mind - gas pumps measure volumes of gasoline, not densities of fuel concentration. You are charged according to "volume of measurement."

3. Choose the type and brand of gasoline carefully. Certain brands provide you with greater economy because of better quality. My car calls for the medium-grade. I don't put the cheapest gas in it.

4. Avoid filling the gas tank all the way to the top. Never fill gas tank past the first "click"of fuel nozzle.

5. Avoid prolonged warming up of your engine, even on cold mornings : 30-45 seconds is enough.

6. Don't start and stop your engine needlessly. Idling your engine for one minute consumes the gas amount equivalent to starting the engine.

7. Exceeding 40 miles per hour forces your car to overcome tremendous wind resistance. Did you know that traveling at 55 mph gives you up to 21% better mileage when compared to former legal speed limits of 65 mph and 70 mph?

8. Keep windows closed when traveling at highway speeds. Open windows cause air drag, reducing your mileage by 10%.

9. Think ahead when approaching hills. If you accelerate, do it before you reach the hill. Not while you're on it.

10. Avoid rough roads whenever possible. Dirt or gravel roads rob you of up to 30% of your gas mileage.

11. Stoplights are usually timed for your motoring advantage. By traveling steadily at the legal speed limit, you boost your chances of having the "green light" all the way.

12. Automatic transmissions should be allowed to cool down when your car is idling, such as at a railroad crossing or long traffic lights. Place it in neutral gear. This reduces transmission strain and allows it to cool.

13. Try to park your car so that you can later begin to travel in forward gear. Avoid reverse maneuvers to save gas.

14. Regular tune-ups ensure best economy. Special attention should should be given to maintaining clean air filters. Diminished air flow increases gas waste.

15. Inflate all tires to maximum limit. When shopping for tires, get large diameter tires for rear wheels. Radial designs are the recognized fuel savers.

16. Bear in mind when buying a new car that a fancy sun roof helps disturb smooth air flow (and mileage).

17. Remove excess weight from your trunk or the inside of your car. Extra tires, back seats, etc., reduce mileage. Especially when driving up inclines.

18. When possible, drive in a car pool.

19. During cold weather watch for icicles frozen to car frame. Unremoved snow and ice cause tremendous wind resistance. Warm water thrown or hosed on will eliminate it fast.

There was a time when I was bored, and I would get in the car and drive down the road to the strip malls. Browse in the stores.

Now when I'm bored, I get my sneakers on, grab my camera, and take a walk. Good exercise, and I get some good shots. It always gives me a more positive attitude after I've been outside enjoying some rays of sunshine.

Many of these tips are just common sense. Most importantly, drive safely. And don't turn your cell phone on while driving.

***

Please go visit Claudia, Elaine, Jen & Diane to see what frugal tips they have to share on how to save on gas for your family.

I believe Jen is moving into her house today. So be safe and don't wear yourself out, Jen!

Claudia is sick with Don's cold. So she sounds like she is underwater when she talks. Get well soon, Claudia!

Next week, the Frugal Five will be giving you some thrifty ideas on ways to economize on entertainment. Hope to see you then!

This Thing We Call Blogging

2012-02-01T10:27:00.001-06:00

Yesterday was a gorgeous day here in Tulsa land. I grabbed my camera and started walking the neighborhood. Lord knows I need the exercise.

As I clicked away at anything that caught my fancy, I thought about this thing called blogging, that started on a whim for me. On the last day of December 2007. And how I'm still so enthused about it.

First of all, it fostered a love for photography. And now it's a mainstay of my life.

Secondly, there's all the friends I've made through blogging. Some of which I'm now so close to we talk on the phone as well.

There's the joy I get from writing, which is in itself therapeutic.

And then of course there's the money one can make whilst letting their creative projects and voice spill out into the blogosphere.

If someone had told me, over five years ago, that I could actually make some money doing what I love, I would have scoffed. I would have laughed them under the table.

I mean, it's not the take-care-of-all-my-needs kind of money. (A girl can hope...) But it sure helps.

But it's true. You can make money. It won't make most of us rich. But it's a nice little bonus while doing something you love, heh?

Oh, look at this red Mustang. What a beauty. Some things just never go out of style.

One of the other things that never cease to be is this: people like to see pretty pictures. They like to get information free. They like the instant inspiration they can find online to do projects.

Blogs are big. I think blogs will be big for a long time. I think they're here to stay. Please don't quote me!

And frankly, I can't see people getting bored with the format of blogging any time soon. I know I'm in virtual heaven skipping from blog to blog, oohing and aahing over the creativity I find there. And am continually so amazed by!

When I started, it was a growing phenomenon. But it wasn't anything like it is now. Blogs are there for most any interest you may have. Blogs have actually made some people celebrities. Who would have "thunk" it way back when?

If you're crafty and want to sell things, you need a blog. If you want to make money with ads without doing anything but allowing them to run on your site, you need a blog. And the best part is, you can have a free blog like Blogger. It doesn't have all the bells and whistles of Wordpress.org. But it's free. Aggravating, but free.

I may switch someday, but for now I'm still thankful (despite the bugs that cause me skepticism on a regular basis) to have it.

If you have a business, you need a blog.

In fact, I was reading recently that blogs are the new resume. A potential employer can look at a daily log of what you're capable of. That you stick with it and keep the ideas coming. And that is much better than reading a resume that has been tweaked over and over to make you look good.

So how do you make money?

First, you build your blog. You take great photos and you write things of interest that people want to read. You comment, comment, comment on other blogs to get recognized. We all have to go through this rite of passage. And keep it going.

Then once you've built your blog and accumulated some numbers to your list of readers, you look at the publishing advertising venues open to you.

I highly recommend BlogHer. Highly. Then of course there's Adsense. And Lijit and many others. Just do what I do: Google: advertising formats for bloggers. A plethora of information is at your fingertips.

Once you have said ads on your blog, monitor them. See which ones are performing where. Move them around. Play with it. Check your performance reports.

Build your business of blogging by being an avid student, which means learning something every day. I truly do learn something new everyday. Google is the greatest thing since sliced bread.

I post pretty much every day. It's like keeping your spoon stirring the pot.

I suggest you blog at least every other day. Otherwise people lose that feeling of blog intimacy that means they're interested in what you're doing. And where did you suddenly go, they wonder when they don't see you post?

Help new bloggers. I call it the good karma rule. Give your knowledge to those just starting. As Martha would say: "It's a good thing."

Take people inside your homes and your gardens and let them see where you live. You don't have to show the piles of laundry you haven't folded in two days.

Show them a seat and they will virtually sit down with you and thus a relationship will be formed between you. You must connect with them to keep them coming back.

Show things that depict your personality. This is what they think of when they think of you.

It's important. Trust me.

See how all these houses have a different personality? So do you.

Most importantly, don't try to copy anyone else's voice. Bring forth your own. We all have one. It's there inside of us, just waiting to come out.

The more you write, the louder that voice will be. It will beseech you to sit down and give it words. It's there. Trust me.

Note: Tomorrow The Frugal Five (I've suddenly dubbed us this name that makes us sound like a cheesy teen-aged garage band) will be here to share their own unique tips on saving money on gas on Thrifty Living 2012.

Winter Thoughts & Custom Comforts Pillows

2012-01-31T11:50:00.001-06:00

Isn't this male cardinal resplendent in his beautiful red plumage?

Here you can see his face better.

I am so ready to see little buds and bits of green showing on the trees. But it will be awhile still.

Have you read the blog Custom Comforts? Cindy has a beautiful blog. And something she has been doing recently is making pillows out of clothing. Just take a look at this one:

This pillow was made from clothing she picked up used. In other words, for a song. And here I am buying fabric!

Look at this one:

Now this is true recycling. I bow to you, my blogging friend!

Go over to Cindy's blog and read where each piece she used came from. It is quite interesting.

The details on these pillows, oh my!

This reminds me of the patchwork quilts of old. When women cut up clothing that no longer fit their family. Or was nearly threadbare.

I really admire this way of thinking. I am truly inspired.

New Curtains, Rearranging, & Rethinking Spending

2012-01-30T11:13:00.000-06:00

On Friday, after finally being able to get my new state tag for my car, I treated myself to a trip to Hobby Lobby.

I wandered the fabric aisles. I wanted to change up some things in my living room. And wanted a deeper blue color for the curtains on each side of the decorative fireplace.

I want to put cafe curtains on the other windows as well. But that will come with time. Being thrifty means being more patient. It means making better decisions.

But before I went to the table to have my fabric cut, I reconsidered. I needed the muslin soon for pillows. But car insurance for six months and the new tag had dug deeply into my bank account.

Where there was a day I would have not thought too much about this decision, today was different. I put the bolts of fabric back. And the other items you always find yourself throwing in the basket because "it's a good deal and on sale."

I was dealing with some sadness, of which I wrote yesterday. By the way, thank you all for your kind comments. It seems when I share and write about my feelings, it's as though they cease bothering me as much.

It's like I've placed them in a pocket to be stored away and I can go on unencumbered.

So yesterday I went through what fabric I have and selected the blue you see at my windows. It wasn't exactly what I wanted. But it was one of the very few fabrics I had enough of to sew curtains out of. It is also flannel. But I made them anyway.

I changed up the look in front of my fireplace. Added a freshly laundered vintage table cloth to the sewing machine table underneath the window.

I had the two paintings leaning against the mantel just under the TV in a closet. One of the few I hadn't found a home for yet. And was pleased with the additions.

I've been trying to bring a little more yellow-gold into the mix. And for some reason these paintings, though they were quite cheap when I bought them years ago, make me happy.

Remember you can always change the look of your couch with a quilt or bedspread tucked in! Isn't that right, Abi?

I made the two yellow pillows. But the green ones are just pillow shams that happen to match the quilt on the chair across the room. They came from Marshalls while I lived in Texas. I see nothing wrong with using bed pillows on a couch.

I am learning that sometimes you buy things because it fills a temporary need inside of you. But the feeling itself is also temporary.

I feel much better knowing I used what I had, and that was good enough.

When I Think Of Her

2012-01-29T11:11:00.001-06:00

Every year at this time, I think of her.

Someone long ago told me, probably whispered to me, that the end of January is her birthday. My mother's birthday.

Sometimes I stare into the darkness at night, and wonder if she sees the same moon.

If she is out there, still alive, somewhere. On some porch in some town, looking up too. If she ever lets herself think of giving birth to me in the late 1950s.

If she remembers something special about me all these years later.

If she paused, on that winter day while packing her bags, to seal a memory of me in a place she could visit later. If maybe she told me she was sorry for what she had to do.

I wonder if a six week old baby misses its mother. If it knows the sound of her footsteps, and recognizes the sound of her voice. And somehow never forgets it.

I wonder if right then, on the day she left, an empty space began to open deep within me. And is the hole I feel to this day.

The days are gray with winter. The tree branches are stark against the sky. I sit inside and listen to the wind howl, causing rustling sounds as they scrape and claw at the windows.

Sometimes I just feel an urge to walk down a country road. The fields will stretch endlessly on either side. And eventually meet the sky.

Perhaps I will have a goal in mind. It is maybe deep within the recesses of my brain. And just hasn't come out to make itself known yet.

Maybe one day I will wake up and it will just appear in front of me. Flashing a message in neon light. An answer as plain as the nose on my face.

I will wonder what took it so long to arrive. But feel relief that it has finally shown itself to me.

Sometimes I will sit in a restaurant, and my eyes will connect with a stranger's. I wonder if, in that instant when our eyes are aligned, if they somehow know what is in my head.

Because it seems from the look on their face that they have felt what I am feeling too.

So there is a week, inevitably, the fourth week of the first month of the new year, when I find myself tearing up for no reason.

Inexplicably. In strange places. While picking out bananas in the grocery. Or waiting for the traffic light to change.

Sometimes I turn my head quickly, ashamed of my emotions getting the best of me. And some of what comes from that hole, deep inside of me still, beads up into clear droplets that fall before I can blink them away.

How to explain to others what I can't even explain to myself? That I somehow miss a person I only knew for six weeks of my life.

And then of course, the first month of the new year will end. The page on the calendar will be turned over.

And what was there, stuck in my mind like an endless dream, like an old record player with its needle stuck in place and screeching against the black vinyl, will for the most part evaporate.

Or at least recede into that place where memories are tucked away. In that safe place that has a somewhat flimsy lock on it.

Gone into hibernation until the calendar is taken down. To be replaced with another. And the hole in my being is an open wound yet again.

Lunch With Youngest Daughter

2012-01-28T10:22:00.000-06:00

Today my youngest daughter is coming over for lunch. It's just pizza. But I've set the table for us.

I made myself some fabric napkins yesterday. For some reason the fabric I ordered had some small stains on it. So that gave me an excuse to use it for myself.

I made four napkins. Thought this blue and white print was so pretty. Even though it has some small rust-looking stains in a few places. One yard was perfect for four napkins.

She actually invited me to go out and have lunch. But I said why don't we just stay here and have a lazy afternoon.

It will certainly make the dogs happy that I'm not going anywhere today. Yesterday I had to go through the hoopla of getting an in-state automobile tag.

Today I'm just happy to be out of the crowds!

And besides, just getting to spend some time with her is most important.

What are your plans for the day?

New Information On Carbonite

2012-01-27T16:33:00.000-06:00

The other day I signed up for a free 15 day trial of Carbonite. It is a computer back up system.

But then today a friend mentioned she didn't think there was actually a way for them to back up Blogger, or any other format like it.

So I just got off the phone with Carbonite support. Seems she is correct.

Your blog is not a file. It backs up files automatically.

He said unless you were to email your blog posts to yourself on a non-internet email system, such as Outlook, it would possibly back them up. But, for instance, I use Yahoo and Gmail. Not going to back that up.

So if you signed up for a free trial this week after I wrote that post, I wanted you to have this information before you gave them your credit card to pay after the initial 15 days.

It will back up your photos and the things it says on their website. But you don't see a mention of blogs. Because for many of us, our posts are being written directly on Blogger. If we wrote them and kept them on a word processing program in a file, it might be a different scenario.

So I'm back to square one. I know of people who have had their blogs disappear. I thought this would protect me. It will not.

Just wanted you to have the same information that I do. If you know something I don't about this, please leave it in a comment or email me.

Welcome Wagon Friday 1/27/12

2012-01-27T09:48:00.000-06:00

Good morning. It's Welcome Wagon day again.

Up for you this week I have:

Blue Chateau is a blogger living in a 100 year old house. She loves living and decorating frugally.

Isn't it dreamy? She's full of tips and good food ideas.

Patchwork & Lace is a blogger with three children and loves patchwork and crochet...

Don't you just love all the colors? I'd love to curl up here with a good book.

And here's her organized stash. Be still my heart...

County Line Road is a blogger who proclaims to be a serial collector, and an avid seeker and seller of all things vintage...

Just take a look at what she refurbished so beautifully. From this...

To this... Oh my!

And just this week I've found Poppy Juice. She has many practical tips on how to live frugally and have fun doing it. Get this: She has six children and is a stay-at-home mom. She has a licensed daycare center. And sings in a band! She's one busy lady! Go over to see her many tips on how to save money and live happily.

Thrifty Living 2012: Installment 2

2012-01-26T08:56:00.000-06:00

Good morning. This is the second installment in our Thrifty Living 2012 Series. We are having a weekly discussion on our separate economic struggles in our various regions. And how our various-sized families of all different ages and backgrounds are attempting to deal with it.

Today we are delving more into our individual situations before we tackle the tough stuff starting next week...

Participating is:

Claudia of Mockingbird Hill Cottage

Jen of Muddy Boot Dreams

Elaine of Sunny Simple Life
Diane of Lavender Dreams

And me of course

Having just gotten divorced mere months ago, I am learning a lot about how to sort out finances and stretch my dollars and budget my household.

My ex handled all that before. (Now I think I know why.)

Nevertheless, I had not paid bills since my early thirties. I woke up to a world of paying bills online. And much, much more bureaucracy than I was accustomed to in what seemed a much simpler time. (Maybe it's because I'm older too, that it seems more complicated!)

I have made saving a big part of this new life. As that was not part of our lives before. Money came in, money was spent. It petrified me.

Now I have a savings account I contribute to monthly. And feel a bit better knowing I won't be penniless if the next check does not come in on time.

I am sorting through ways to make a living for myself and the dogs, Abi and Charlie. Learning to live alone. How to fix things I'd normally just call someone to come do. And ultimately how to economize in general.

Having left my neighbors and friends in Texas, not to mention my two beloved cats, Clyde and Emily, I am going through a mourning period of sorts over that loss. This must be the grieving stage of any big life change.

Not having the cats leaves a deep and painful hole in my heart. But dividing the pets was part of the agreement. And the dogs take much more care. So that necessitated them coming with me.

I will be 55 next month. And things don't seem to come as easily to me as they once did. I don't adapt to new situations as readily. That's not to say it was easy when I got my first divorce when my girls were young either.

My fears of the future is how to pay for medical care once my Cobra is up in a year. How to pay for my medication that is already way beyond what I could manage to pay without insurance. How to make a living to support myself and the dogs, in an economy where everyone, it seems, is seeking work.

My dream is to work here from home. It is where I'm most comfortable, and where I could channel my efforts best. I'm not sure what all I will have to do to make that happen. Or even if it is possible. But I'm going to give it the old college try.

Next week our thrifty team is going to give our own individual takes on gasoline consumption in our own regions. And how we economize.

Hope to see you then!

Trying To Get Back On Task

2012-01-25T13:04:00.000-06:00

My oldest daughter has brought over some lovely flowers she's made from different sources for me to embellish pillows and such.

But I've been so busy dealing with "first of the year" problems after moving that I haven't had the proper time to devote to my sewing.

I finally got this small quilt hung in my office here.

You see, Oklahoma and Texas are very different about how they handle automobile tags. In Texas you go to the Department of Motor Vehicles, apparently. And in Oklahoma you go to a tag agency.

Except I don't have prior evidence of car registration. My ex got the notice in the mail. And thinking I'd handle it here, shredded it.

I have looked through everything I own. My youngest daughter went all through my Pathfinder. We can't find any other proof of registration anywhere.

I have gotten insurance here, my drivers license here. But am lacking that one thing to get a tag, which is due by the end of the month.

So I've been so busy chasing my tail going to the tag agency and having them tell me I need yet again something else that I haven't had much time for creative endeavors.

It is cold and rainy, so not good for outdoor photos.

But tomorrow we get to know our Thrifty Living 2012 team a bit better. So be sure to check in with the blogs of Claudia, Jen, Elaine and Diane for that.

Frazzled But Relieved

2012-01-24T16:07:00.001-06:00

What have I been up to all day?

Well, here it is nearly 4 p.m. Central Time, and after I started drinking my coffee this morning, I got a wild hair to try and see if I could make a collage blog banner in Picasa.

The reason this was a very wild hair, is because I've tried many times before. I printed off instructions from two different sites. Before I have given up. I can easily make a banner in Picnik, then tweak it in Photoscape.

I was determined. Thus, the time, many hours and a sandwich at my desk later.

After many MANY tries, I have put the banner up. And I am somewhat pleased with my efforts. Though I still have a lot of learning to do if they're going to get rid of Picnik.

For one, I could not for the life of me figure out how to add text in Picasa on a banner. So I transferred the untitled banner to Photoscape, where I'm much more comfortable. And did it there.

Whilst making myself near cross-eyed from all this, I also had another program on my computer running in the background. I will have to thank Kim for this tip, which she gave in a comment yesterday on this blog.

I was once again debating on moving over to Wordpress.org. But she mentioned she'd downloaded a program called Carbonite. And I was off to the races to research this.

In essence, it is an automatic backup system to back up your computer. This includes your photos. There is a free trial offer, no credit card required, for a short period.

We Blogger bloggers are afraid to lose our blogs, given the fact that we've all known others this has happened to. I have put near three years into this blog, every day. This was a huge fear.

But somehow, with all the changes that have occurred in my life in such a short time already, I just cannot see myself switching anything else huge in my life. I just can't. I'm already worn out.

So after the free trial period of 15 days, I will happily pay the $59 per year for this peace of mind. At least for now.

I need my life to run at a relaxed pace in the slow lane for awhile, you know?

So if this is a concern of yours also, you might go visit Carbonite.com and see if you think this is worth it to you.

I don't know what the future holds. But I got my water bill today, and after calling them, found out I'd overpaid. A nice mistake. I will get at least another month or two of this utility free, so I thought that was perhaps a sign to go ahead and do this.

I like signs. They are a port in the storm when I'm chewing my fingernails down to the quick. Or so I tell myself.

I wasn't really wanting a new banner right now. But I was determined to see if I could do this. I've heard many of you say how easy making a banner on Picasa is.

I virtually take my hat off to you and bow in true admiration.

Gifts, Blogger Dilemmas, & Fluffy Dogs

2012-01-23T13:46:00.000-06:00

The mail brought me two gifts today. Isn't that homemade flower atop the box just adorable?

This was from Teresa at Magazine Your Home. She sent me some bias binding and the box had this in it...

The little card is a needle holder. How sweet!

Then Veronica, a reader, sent me some goodies.

And this...

To add to my small collection of "adopted" relatives found here and there. Except the back looks like this and the stand is broken off. Any ideas?

I just have to wonder how old this is...

Now I want to show the dogs after I bathed them in the kitchen sink last evening.

Abi looks like she's had a bad perm!

They need a haircut. But I'm not about to try that again, after botching it once.

I also forgot to mention that it was Shannon from Cozy Home Scenes who made these darling little crocheted flowers for me, that I showed yesterday on my old collage window.

The sun is shining brightly today. But I've been worried about what's going on (or not going on) at Blogger recently.

First there's all the hoopla over Google soon getting rid of Picnik. (Geez, I make all my photo collages on Picnik!!!)

And there's the fact that readers email me almost every day, saying they can't see all of my posts. They keep disappearing.

I'm having terrible problems with the layout. I keep getting error messages whenever I click on tools. Yep, I'm getting a tad nervous...

I will be the first to say how much I love Blogger. Or have until recently. But I'm also worried over the bloggers that have recently lost their blogs. Can you imagine waking up one day and your blog has just up and disappeared?

What are your feelings, fellow Blogger bloggers? Are you worried about all this? Are you toying with migrating over to Wordpress.org? Which I thought I would NEVER in a million years consider doing. But I just don't know anymore...

Feedback appreciated on this current dilemma we Blogger bloggers are now facing.

Times are uncertain enough. I just want to know (and is that even possible?) that my blog can be a somewhat safe part of my everyday life.

Much Ado About Nothing Much

2012-01-22T12:01:00.000-06:00

I think it's going to be yet another hot chocolate day. It's gray and somewhat dreary outside.

I had wanted to participate in My Little Home And Garden's Sunlit Sunday. But I looked about my house, and not a shaft of sun was anywhere to be found. I looked outside; dark skies. And it's close to noon, so I doubt it's going to change much.

So I am showing a photo I took a few weeks ago, as at least it has sun. If you have sun in your neck of the woods, maybe you might want to participate. I envy you your shafts of sunlight...

I know. Kind of lame. I want some sun in my life! I am yearning for pots of colorful flowers!

Here is a photo before the leaves all fell off in my neighborhood...

I will have to rely on my occasional store-bought bouquets I allow myself. They are the sunshine in my day.

My youngest daughter and I had a wonderful lunch yesterday.

Then we took the Singer Featherweight by the sewing machine place. (Me thinks I'm going to start going someplace else.)

This place is not just a repair shop. It sells fabric and sewing machines and has classes.

I think I need a little somewhat dingy place like I'm accustomed to, with some elderly men that wear overalls (like I'm accustomed to). And know their sewing machines inside out.

First of all, the woman that waited on me said he was gone to lunch. Then she saw him and grabbed him before he made it out the door. I'm sure he wasn't happy.

He comes over and looks at the 1947 Featherweight, turns it over, scowls, then tells me he has no idea where that screw came from that I said fell out as soon as I got the machine home.

I start pointing out tiny holes that a screw could possibly go into. Nope, he says. How about here? I ask him, pointing to a place near the needle. He tells me I could put one there, but he wouldn't advise it.

What? I was really confused with that one. Nevertheless, he is knelt down and in a few minutes shows me the machine is working. I sigh, and say fine. I'm ready to head home.

My daughter is seated behind me. oblivious and on her iPhone, and needing to get home to host a baby shower.

(This is why I don't want a "smart" phone. First I don't want to pay the internet fees, as I rarely turn a cell phone on. Secondly, it would take up my life! I would miss the sun even should it put in an appearance!)

Some of you wanted to know what calendar I showed part of yesterday. I should have said. It is by Susan Branch. I ordered mine at Amazon.com.

Speaking of Amazon.com, I noticed that they have a subscription program for food and such. For items eligible for their Subscribe and Save program. I seem to eat a lot of Kashi cereal. Which is why I was looking in the first place.

I see they have lots of items I could buy in "bulk" and skip at the grocery store. And save myself both in driving costs and grocery bills. And it's free shipping on every order!

Do any of you use this program? I printed out all the details and shall peruse it in detail.

Seems you choose a date and they automatically deliver it and bill your credit/debit card. (I no longer use credit cards, so in my case it would be the bank debit card.)

It says there are no commitments, so I might try this. And you can change or cancel your subscription online at any time.

I hope to get some sewing done today. Then I will probably wait till Don goes to work this afternoon, call Claudia, and we'll sit down with our hot chocolate. Me in Oklahoma, she in New York, and chat.

When we're on the phone, I have Abi at my end causing trouble and making racket because she's angry I'm on the phone. And on her end is Scout, doing her best with her shenanigans. What is it about our female dogs? Our males are happy to snooze, it seems.

Thinking Of Spring Time

2012-01-21T09:57:00.000-06:00

Today my youngest daughter is coming to take me to lunch. And we need to take the 1947 Singer Featherweight back to the shop.

As soon as I brought it home and set it down, a tiny screw came out of nowhere and disappeared. Probably never see it again.

And something is still wrong with the tension. For $100, I expect better than that. So back it goes.

I could not for the life of me get the other sewing machine threaded back correctly after I had to wind some bobbins (knocked me off track; hate that).

So Judy from 20 Northora was kind enough to come get that right. Thanks a bunch, Judy!

The days have often been dark and gray. So I took off the cafe curtains I had on these windows on either side of the decorative fireplace, in order to get more light into my little living room. For now anyway.

I can recall a month or so ago buying this rather decrepit looking window, paint peeling terribly, from an estate sale for $15. It sat on my back porch in all its peeling glory for weeks.

Now I can't imagine not having it in here where I can enjoy it everyday. Isn't it funny how things endear themselves to you over time? Oh, I know it isn't everyone's cup of tea, but it is certainly mine!

I love to sit in the other (can't see it here) comfy chair, and stare at my little green touches of late. And dream of spring time.

I'm looking forward to garage and estate sales. Where I can dig through other people's cast-offs and ponder what to do with them.

I'll probably have to somewhat limit my search for things for the yard, as I've nearly filled this little house to the brim.

When the calendar is turned a few more pages. And the seasons begin to change yet again.

Welcome Wagon Friday 1/20/12

2012-01-20T09:58:00.000-06:00

Here we are at Welcome Wagon Friday time again.

Up for you this week I have:

Ivy & Elephants says they are moms, dreamers, visionaries and creators. Here's a look...

I love the way they put things together!

Sommerwhite is Gaby's blog. She lives in New Zealand. Her dream is to build and design her own house by the beach...

Her photos just relax me in their serenity.

With A Vintage Twist is a woman that has retired and loves vintage things and photography. (I sure agree with her there!)...

And she has some old cameras to prove it.

Please head on over and greet these ladies. Tell them we're here to make new friends far and wide. Welcome them to our ever-growing community.