Stageology & The Intulexia Paradime

In the ten Stages we begin to understand that we have the power to recharge our lives

2016-06-04T17:08:00.000+01:00

In the Ten Stages we begin to understand that we have the power to recharge our lives whilst stop being dependent on substances or other people as an act of escape into unreality/dissociation. We have constructed for ourself an illusion a constant unremitting search for a quick fix which robs us of both our self-esteem and security. At this time we start to acknowledge a rebirth that their does exist a truer self within that can heal and regain control of our lives, and that this is the reason – coupled with all of our unresolved childhood traumas!– that our lives has become so disturbed and dysfunctional. What are these childhood traumas and where do they originate every-time a child has been disrespected regardless of the reason.Every-time we disrespect a child thats abuse. Its not difficult to understand we can all relate to it and we all need to acknowledge it.

We understand when we communicate with the child within that at the core of our problems are all the traumas we experienced as a child. We acknowledge, and that’s why we come to the stages. When the child within can accept that, and when we can find a solution for the unresolved trauma of childhood coping strategies then the symptoms will start to become manageable and quickly loose power over our lives. All our dysfunctions will start to normalise instead of remaining constantly stuck in the DRAMA and chaos of dissociation. This is a very fragile and delicate operation which requires truth trust and consent to be manifested to the satisfaction of the child within us.

The Stages seek to help search for a our version of the "Truth" and our truth when found,and accepted will set us free from our escapism/dissociation and we learn that for us there is only one truth. This one truth is based on our daily reality. Reality is what is, whether we see it or not. Although truth is not subjective, our perspectives on truth can be subjective. Until a person becomes enlightened to realised truth – and can see full truth of his life and history – his vision of truth will be partially distorted. He will believe things to be true that are false. His knowledge of cause and effect will be limited. He will lie to himself and be deluded.

Unresolved traumas block our vision from finding our truth. When we cannot resolve our traumas of childhood we are prevented from facing what has happened to us when we were at our most vulnerable.

We are forced to deny the painful and troubling reality surrounding our experiences, and until these experiences burst through our denial they will clouds our vision of who we are and what our rightful place in the world is.

The true self the core of who each of us is, lives resplendent in our truth. It is connected to truth, and sees it clearly. When we reconnect with our true self and align with it in the full light of consciousness, we come to instantly recognise our own personal truth which becomes a liberating peaceful force working at all times for our benefit, a whole and complete experience. At this time a great weight lifts from us and for the first time we feel free. Our conflicts are starting to resolve themselves with the help of the guides on the study course and the introduction to our deeply buried intuitive voice we start to feel a relief from the burden of Self.

Stage 2 Study

We come to believe that meditation and the quietening of our created parental voice begins to relax the judgemental voices that we have picked up in our dysfunctional childhoods. The understanding that our creation of a God/Goddess/Universe/Creator/Spirit/Higher Power are externalised judgemental voices which collude in keeping us in a cage of safety and dull us down into non productive coping strategies. We awaken the healing wisdom within us when we open ourselves to that clear power of our meditations.At this stage the seeds of our authentic selves and trust in the healing power of the truth starts to permeate back into our consciousness. We move into a quite neutral space and we reawaken a sense of anxiety and fear. At this time we recognise that we need reassurance that all is well and the anxiety is an illusion.

We come to understand that since there is a form of universality within us, this is a our true self . We came to recognise that this God/personalised parental figure outside of us and beyond us, that this externalised God, who is essentially little more than an idealised, fantasy parent, can not save us and we are not being disloyal to reject it. The newly found self starts to reconstruct our lives.

Basically,The coping strategy of the old belief system tells us that we can’t take care of ourselves because we are too wounded as children, too completely damaged, but we still believe in our illusion that our idealised Mommies/Daddies can still save us! We just have to put our faith back in this illusory Mommy figure hopefully a better fantasised Mommy than we had the first time around not the one who participated in crushing our personality and making us into such a deranged dysfunctional person.

Stage 3 Study(rewrite)

Here in Stage 3 we examine our beliefs, addictions, and dependent behaviour in the context of living in a materialistic dominated society & culture. We explore affirmations and start to understand ourselves and how we are influenced in all aspects of our life. We study with our trusted friends a new life affirming belief that we can really take care of ourselves and heal our own wounds, and we will consciously decide that this externalisation of our split-off inner self – this external God of an-others creation – cannot save us. This is our movement away from dissociation.

This revised belief system shatters our unconscious, grandiose, and immature idea that we can be the king of our own self-proclaimed universe.

The dysfunctionally created belief of other or outside God that simply place it on something external, which allows us all the while to keep alive a façade of humility. When we speak of God or Higher Power we are really speaking of my own unconscious, grandiose feelings about myself, which follow the exact template of our idealised image of our dysfunction parental figures.Since this is our created illusion for an equilibrium in our world and an explanation for our disastrous relationships, we feel under threat and are constantly rubber banded into our past or catapulted into a seemingly disastrous future We have created our explanation for what we see as a failed life.

Stage 4 Study

In stage four we share with our trusted compatriots and the Universe all those things inside of us for which we feel shame and guilt as we have come to identify them. Now that we have worked hard to believe that we do have a true and honest self within. We have come to understand at this stage that our old lives lived under the mounds of unresolved childhood trauma which we did not believe we ever had. We had thought in the previous stages that we had cleared all our blockages.Here we review without judgement and attempt through self reflection to understand the motivation that others have placed into our psyche.

We will look within, explore to find out what else might be just be within side us. We will take an emotional inventory of the traumas foisted on us when we were a child. These revelations might force us to discover that our parents really did mess us up worse than we first thought, and that we gain a realisation of the level of upwelling pain and anger coming from that discovery were at the roots of our dysfunctions and alienation.

That the old patterns of dysfunction and often addiction were really self-medication and the inevitable flight from reality. We do not do a “moral” inventory, that will only replay our childhood trauma just by studying our morals, our own “badness” and hurtful behaviour .The reasons are that the mere act of revisiting childhood trauma and the frozen self is that we have already been programmed to come to believe firmly that we had no true self. We have learned we were programmed to believe we are to be condemned at birth.

Therefore we are indoctrinated with a false unrealistic version of the self that attempts to root us into the deepest moral and inner goodness of an idealised fantasy society which reinforces our denial of our own inner truth. We are born perfect and must come realise the dysfunction is grafted on to us, with the overriding sick belief that we are born to fail. We are taught health is toxic and we create inside a numbing down to a zombie state of lack of emotions and feelings.We become an automaton and work at eradicating the beauty inside ourselves.

Stage 5 Study
In Stage five we come to recognise and enjoy our own intelligence, strengths and creativity, remembering not to hide these qualities from ourselves and others. With the newly found self-reflection as to where our acting out behaviour might have come from that is, an acknowledgement that our disturbed patterns are simply a replication of the traumas done to us when we were vulnerable and innocent and powerless in our own family as a child.
We will now start to understand all the negative things that others have done to us. We will reject these previous lists of perceived negativity drawn up by our tormentors and the people who sort to control us.

During this stage we will come to understand that by being forced to admit to this externalised God of another creation (which we have become convinced NOW is separate from the essence of us!) and to the controlling persons/adults/parents/teachers who buy into this deluded and dissociative philosophy. They rubbed salt into our already wounded self which only further traumatised us paralysing us both psychically and emotionally. We threw ourselves down a blind alley of despair, and further cut ourselves off the from deeper healing roots of ourself that we now realise has the power to heal us.

Step 6 Study

Having experienced the realisations we become willing to let go of guilt, shame and any behaviour that prevents us from loving ourselves and others.Now that having explored what was done to us and what motivates our dysfunctional behaviour –We strongly reject the conformity of belief that we need to be pleasing in the eyes of this external God (Mommy), on that basis will be ready and able to be loved once again. This belief which in the past had given us such a warm feeling inside, a dissociative feeling which we would mistakingly take for being a sign-marker on our path to love and enlightenment. We must always remember that no one but the family of the others is in reality responsible for our perceived “defective character,” but the responsibility is with Mommy herself! Mommy the one who will save us is the perpetual myth faced in this stage. She has everything do to with why our belief system are so messed up! We quietly meditate on compassion and loving kindness that their is a strong chance that Mommy was passing on her learned behaviour. We do not seek blame anyone neither do we discount the damage done to us. We simply let it lie as a product of our studies.We understand what has happened to us.
Even if the natural Mommy is not present, the conceptualised commercial mommy peers down at us from each advertising hoarding or if we switch on the television and tune to a soap we will see a mother figure posturing with its moral judgemental stance attempting to reinfect us with unrealistic aspirations

Stage 7 Study.
At this stage we can make a list of people that our learned dysfunctional lives have harmed and people who have harmed us, and take steps to clear out negative energy by making amends and sharing our grievances in a respectful way. We come to understand healthy alternatives to the behaviours that we could practice in our studies and discuss them at length.We start to recognise and understand the internal voices in our heads and where they originate.

We come to realise the disfunction use of the words forgiveness and gratitude as a term of abuse used to control us. The victimisation of foregiveness the granting of forgiveness only allows the abuser to redouble their attempts to exercise control over us and push us back into the dissociated past. "Please Mommy/God, now that We’ve admitted how bad we are, and how much We’ve hurt you, and how naughty We’ve been, will you love us again and tell us that I’m a good boy/girl? We’ll do anything you say. We really do love you, We really, really do. And We always did love you deep down, even though you did horrible things to us which we can’t seem to remember anyway because we were so pickled ourselves with booze/drugs/dysfunctional behaviour's to try to blot out the memories. Please tell us We are a good boys/girls again!"
The reinforcing guilt and shame that this stage addresses and the voices of judgement and shame that we recreate in our subconscious have once more to be addressed with a greater understanding in our stage 7.

Stage 8 Exercise
The stages whilst we are a study course we have to look at our actions connected to our previous work. This stage is about learning to express empathy and understanding coming to increasingly appreciate the wonder of our newly discovered life and the blessings we do have. We learn to understand the suffering of others.

Now We are really going to change our viewpoint and perspective….. We are going to stop being a bad boys/girl s and be a good boys/girls again, and prove to us that We really were good boys/girls all along, even though deep down underneath all our grandiose façade We still think that We are the pathological, worthless, evil, vile, stinking, rotten, useless, hopeless, piece of dogs**t that our messages from the past always subtly and sometimes not so subtly taught us .This the reasons why we drank/drugged so much and so destructively... We start to perceive our life differently in the light of the mixed messages of childhood..."But now We are going to make it all right for the world, even though I’ve still never even come close to looking at the harm that you, Mommy, and you, Daddy, did to me. But We are the bigger person! We have already forgiven you – even though We really have no clue exactly what We have forgiven you for."

Change is found at this stage by acknowledging our inner child's voice by understanding at a deeply conscious level what we can accept that voice, without judgement confronting the denial in our own parental voice. What we cannot list or acknowledge we quietly rest in our self created playground of at this stage of the course.

Stage 9 Study.

In stage nine we acknowledge the length of our journey acknowledging that have come a long way.

We have learnt to trust our reality and daily affirm that we see what we see, we know what we know and we feel what we feel.

We promptly admit to dissociated behaviour and make amends to ourselves when appropriate, but we do not say we are sorry for things we have not done and we do not cover up, analyse or take responsibility for the shortcomings of others, or their learned abusive parental voice
We’ll start to change our ways. We have become so dissociated and split-off from our deep and churning inner rage and fury and misery and sadness over what was done to us that we’ll fool ourselves into believing that now we come across like the Best Little Boys/Girls in the whole wide world. At this stage is the recreation stage where thinking we have cracked it we set out to prove to others that we’ve changed.

On the surface WE WILL change. We’ll be sure we seem different. We won’t get plastered and get violent for no reason and puke all over the new carpets and drive like an intoxicated maniac and frighten the hell out of everyone and force you to live with a pink elephant in your living room. No, the only pink elephant left in our life will be the pink elephant of my entire unconscious, which We won’t notice anymore because it will just get in our way. We’ll smile and convince ourselves that we are reformed, even though underneath it We’ll still be as dissociated and deformed as ever.

Dissociation is not reality and until we come to a deeper understanding of what has happened to us no healing can take place, no meditation will work, no religious practice will have any meaning. We will remain deeply dysfunctional without the symptoms being visible the cancerous cells of our hurt psyche will proceed onwards.Our messages from childhood remain deeply entrenched paralysing us into our old states

Stage 10 Study
It is within this stage that we experiment with our newly found freedoms
We start to seek out new situations,jobs, and people that affirm our intelligence, perceptions, and self-worth and avoid situations or people who are hurtful harmful, or demeaning to us.

We take steps to heal our physical bodies, organise our lives, reduce stress, and have fun.

We seek to find our inward calling, and develop the will and wisdom to follow it.

We accept the ups and downs of life as natural events that can be used as lessons for our growth.

We grow in awareness that we are sacred beings, interrelated with all living things, and we contribute to restoring peace and balance in our life
.
Now we will realise our dissociation. We will renounce clinging to a philosophy and the self that is full of holes, We will start to practice a new way of life, the art of becoming real. Living in our wonderful reality.(WOW the old parenting voice got very condemning at this point "I own you, you are nothing without me.Pay your debt to me.)
We will have gone deep inside the roots of our being to affirm our health. In our found reality, without just practicing splitting off from living in the present moment. We stop looking at our fantasy illusions and we stop making it look fancy to myself and others.
We will stop talking to God of another understanding in prayer because We have no idea who God really is. We will listen to the universe in meditation and be able to realise that We are affirming the deepest and most basic essences of our souls. We will have found ourselves and will now have a beautiful full capacity that I’m come home to myself at last!

Overrider for those of us deprogramming from the fellowships and have our self-worth invested in converting others. REMEMBER THIS IS A PAID FOR TAUGHT COURSE (not a cult, you pay for the course and there is a cut of date everything after that is socialising and enjoyment.We do not have any groups,mentors,sponsors or gurus.This is about unlearning not learning we are all born perfect.)
Now that We have started to become enlightened and free from the twisted thinking ( theres not ours) that resulted in our dysfunction (that is, not dissociated) and no longer need an addictive process to achieve this dissociated state, We will understand real peace in our reality.We will not and go out and begin a mission to proselytise my version of “the truth.” We will renounce the idea that we have to manipulate others who use addictions to dissociate from their unresolved childhood traumas to follow their ( another form of recovery largely unreliable program) and to split-off from their ancient wounds just as we have done. We will renounce the idea that we have to convert anybody by insulting and degrading and pathologising them. We have to acknowledge that It will reinfect us and rebuild the sick selfs very grandiose ways to cajole other traumatised addicts of the dysfunctional paths into dissociating by requesting that they follow our adopted methods and The Stages, but We will acknowledge this as our grandiosity and old outmoded coping strategy an enemy of our newly found reality and we will cease.
Our STAGE Guides are committed, experienced and sensitive and are essential to the changes we go through in our work together.

Ten Stagers who have completed our course are all about our own personal Recovered Freedom

2015-12-22T09:17:00.001+00:00

Ten Stagers are all about Recovered Freedom
Ten Stagers are experienced in a personal dialog with their internal child within that each of us can accesses multiple times a day. The more that relationship is ignored the more one suffers.
Ten Stagers focuses on building that internal relationship, the stronger that internal relationship the more happiness and love are experienced by us.

Ten Stagers allows us the freedom to follow our own true intuitive voice, it sets us free to be and experience life in a harmonious partnership with the world surrounding us.

Ten Stagers Liberate To Full All Encompassing Recovery

Ten Stagers are based on loving kindness and this frees us to experience life to the fullest. To personally discover the cause and consequences of our childhood actions. Self Reflecting on ourself against the world around us allows us to maximise harmony and enjoyment from existence in this life. It allows us the freedom to interact with others without cultural taboos, limited thinking, biases and unenlightened fears that have divided the children within.

Ten Stagers Recognises and Embraces our Difference

Stagers are not threatened by others who hold differing views about life, morality, politics or religious practices. We recognise within ourselves our own child and do not judge others based on their limited conclusions.

Ten Stagers lets us understand that every action generates a reaction. Some feel negative like suffering, it is a reaction coming from actions already set in motion from our hidden past. Counter actions create counter results. As Stagers we know this and act accordingly this helps minimise our suffering.

Ten Stagers lets us discover and understand recovery in our own unique way of connecting internally with our child within. This connection liberates our mind to search and find the recovery path that is our personal truth.

The Ten Stagers philosophy allows us to live our own recovery truth without fear of judgement from others.

The Ten Stagers knows that recovery and truth is all encompassing acknowledging that another’s recovery truth is just as valid as our own.

Ten Stagers focuses on compassion and loving kindness that we can all share without limitations or bias. Stagers recovery shares and builds on itself and doesn’t focus on differences among individuals.

Stagers understands that you don’t need to depend on anything or anyone to be happy.
Stagers comes from deep within our child and we are all responsible to pursue it as our true source of genuine happiness.

Ten Stagers understands that we are always where we need to be and we are always worthy to give and receive recovery in all interactions.

Ten Stagers support our own journey to discover truth in our own way. Honestly following our child withins internal compass tells us what is right because it is our truth.

Ten Stagers bring us inspired writings which came from the journeys of others. Those who penned their experiences to share it with others; the details vary by the characters sharing them. The message or messenger is not important it’s the truth of our ancestral children hidden within that resonates harmoniously deep within each one of us that matters most.

Ten Stagers those of us who have made the effort to complete the twelve week course are finding that the deep internal childhood connection has allowed us to discover and live comfortably in our own truth, with the same recovery and conviction as those Children Within who came before us.

We will live in a world dominated by our past pathology of Vodka and Vomit.

2015-12-11T23:23:00.002+00:00

In the fellowships while it’s all well and good to know where our problem came from, and very important to know where our problem came from, if we only stay focused on that (the pathology) and sharing that pathology, we will not thrive.We will become stuck in the anti-chamber to death locked within our own pathology.We will live in a world dominated by our past pathology of Vodka and Vomit.

To thrive, in any way – medically, mentally, physically, emotionally or spiritually – you’ve got to have an ideal outcome or scenario or destination that you are headed towards.

This isn’t to say that you should be SO fixed on an outcome that you are inflexible and rigid – on the contrary! We are a BIG believer in flow. But, if all we do is spend time focusing on what the addiction is, we leave no room open for our solution.

This isn’t as easy as “being positive”. We are would not be so naive as to say that a positive attitude is enough to make you feel better or heal – especially from extreme illness. However, what I am saying is that without a positive and optimistic outlook, the possibility of healing and THRIVING is almost 0%.

When we focus only on the problem – we get MORE of the problem. And it becomes not only the story of our life, but also our IDENTITY. And when we identify – as in - who we are is now the problem, the likelihood of thriving reduces significantly.

If we wish to thrive, if we wish to live an extraordinary life, if we wish for miracles and to be able to SEE solutions – we must go looking for them within our child. This means that we become aware of the pathology, understand the pathology and then set our minds (i.e. our psychology) on to an outcome of thriving, rather than on the pain of the problem in a group setting.

This is not a prescription for a spiritual bypass of our pain. We must feel our pain fully in order for it to heal. We cannot will our pain away or just wish for life to get better.

The body responds to what our mind feeds it. Healing is a medical process, an emotional process, a physical process AND a spiritual process. To have fixed in our mind a thriving outcome of ideal health and abundance are the cornerstones of creating miracles in our life.

Anyone who has come back from massive failure or had a medical miracle in his or her life operated this way.

Can you? I’m curious.

The wound is the place where the Light enters you

2015-12-11T23:07:00.002+00:00

"The wound is the place where the Light enters you."

- Rumi

"We are healed of a suffering only by experiencing it to the full."

- Marcel Proust

"As my sufferings mounted I soon realized that there were two ways in which I could respond to my situation -- either to react with bitterness or seek to transform the suffering into a creative force. I decided to follow the latter course."

- Martin Luther King Jr.

We have become lazy in our thought processes we wake up and believe that we know everything.

2015-12-11T23:00:00.000+00:00

We have become lazy in our thought processes we wake up and believe that we know everything. When we think we know it all, we are screwed.

When we think that there’s nothing left to explore, discover or understand – we have stepped off the path of mastery and onto the path of decay.

There is an infinite body of wisdom in the world. There is an infinite body of knowledge. Every day we are making scientific breakthroughs. Every day we are making technological advances. Every day we understand more about the human body, mind and soul.

And whatever we think we know will be totally eclipsed in the future by something else, some new discovery.

This is true on the larger level of our evolution as a human race, and on the smaller level of our day to day lives.

You have limiting beliefs that you don’t even know are limiting you. You have limiting beliefs that you know are limiting you. Whatever you “think” your potential is, it is SO SMALL compared to what it really is.

So when we get caught in the idea that the future will be like the past, or that it’s too late for our dreams to come true, or that we are too old, too young, not smart enough, over-qualified, or that life handed us a bad hand in this life, we don’t know what we are talking about.

If we are to remain the student and work towards gaining more knowledge, more freedom, more self-awareness – then eventually we will come to see that the only thing that is truly holding us back is our belief about why we can’t have what we really desire.

Our Child Within knows this – and our child within overcomes our limits by remaining the student and being open to a new way of independent thinking.

Have you got old in your thinking? Have you let the past become your identity? How could you open up and have the mind of a child Within today?

Acceptance, awareness of our current life situation is the first stage we must take towards transforming our lives through contact with our child within.

2015-11-27T13:08:00.000+00:00

Acceptance, awareness of our current life situation is the first stage we must take towards transforming our lives through contact with our child within. We all have a skeleton or two in our closet that has to see the light of day before true transformation can occur.

If we’re feeling anxiety or uneasiness that isn’t caused by a chemical imbalance, chances are we have no integrity with ourself.

What the heck does that mean?

It means that there are truths that we are not being truthful with ourself about. It means that our actions aren’t in alignment with our true core life.

We want to save money and pay down debt, yet we spend frivolous money on things that put us over budget every month driving us into more debt.

We are all just about an inconsistency in what we really want and how we’re acting. This inconsistency affects our moods and can lead to anxiety and all kinds of other negative emotions that tear down our self-esteem.

So, if there’s transformation that has to take place in our life and it’s being blocked, look first at the situation for what it is and accept it 100%. Then, look at the outcome we REALLY want and compare that to the actions we’re taking. Chances are, our actions don’t equate to the desired results we want. If we don’t know what actions to take, it’s time to get real and realise that some parts of our life are controlled by others limiting beliefs inherited from childhood, needs to dissociate from painful memories, frozen emotions that dominate our child withins freedom of expression.

When we are truthful with ourself about the reality of our life, look at the desired outcome we want to create and compare that to the action we’re taking; we get a whole new reality check on why our life is the way it is. And what’s cool is that we can make a new decision with our new awareness, right now and change.

So, are our actions in alignment with our child within. Are we telling ourself the truth of how our life really is right now?

We will go through deep experiences of freedom that bring up intense pain inside of us.

2015-11-26T17:23:00.001+00:00

We will go through deep experiences of freedom that bring up intense pain inside of us. If it is in there, it is going to come up. If we have any wisdom, we will leave it alone and not try to change our life to avoid it.

We will just relax and give it the space to burn through us. We do not want this stuff inside our heart. To feel love and freedom, to find the presence of the child within us, all of this stored pain must go. It is in this inner work that our child within becomes our reality. Growth exists in that moment when we are consciously willing to pay the price of our freedom. We must be willing at all times, in all circumstances, to remain conscious in the face of pain and work with our heart by relaxing and remaining open.

Spontaneous colouring is not a technique that we learn with our mind

2015-11-26T16:49:00.000+00:00

Spontaneous colouring is not a technique that we learn with our mind so that the result will be "art" but more of a joyful process of exploration of our inner world through intuitive colour making.

Spontaneous colouring requires no special talent, skill or inspiration. Because our natural, original style is already within, you are already good enough to begin colouring at any point in our life or any age.

It is challenging to be still, and yet a quiet mind and body is essential to the emotional freedom of Stageolgy.

2015-11-26T16:19:00.001+00:00

It is challenging to be still, and yet a quiet mind and body is essential to the emotional freedom of Stageolgy. A quiet mind reprograms our biology for calm. When we are calm our body stimulates endorphins (natural painkillers), serotonin ( a natural antidepressant), and dopamine ( a hormone that helps us feel good).

There is a loud frantic quality to our busy minds that masks the subtlety of the information that wants to come through. Stillness allows wholeness to speak instead of the fragmented mental chatter of our conflicted mind. Silence allows creative insights to emerge from a place that is deeper than our inner and outer conflicts. Spending time in stillness intensifies intuition and creativity.It is the gateway to our child within.

When we are developing inner stillness, we might first feel emptiness instead of fullness. Often the absence of thought feels difficult to bear at first. We can be addicted to the drama of busyness and loud negative emotions. Negative loud emotions can feel more familiar than the quiet wholeness of our intuition.

We grasp that the root of our problem is not alcohol, but all the trauma we experienced as children

2015-11-26T09:17:00.001+00:00

We finally admit that we have a true self our child within that can heal and regain control over our lives, and that this is the reason why we have become addicted and dysfunctional because of all of our unresolved childhood traumas! Our life as a result has become toxic so disturbed and dysfunctional that we resort to dissociation in alcohol, drugs, food, romance etc. . We grasp that the root of our problem is not alcohol, but all the trauma we experienced as children and have not yet acknowledge, and that’s why we come to the stages. If we can cure the root causes of our addiction then everything will be start to be resolves and we will understand true recovery.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/spiritmindfulness/

2015-11-25T14:27:00.000+00:00

https://www.facebook.com/groups/spiritmindfulness/

One of the fundamental messages is that we are not victims, but a co-creator of our life with our child hidden within.

2015-08-24T11:16:00.001+01:00

The most important part of life, and the only part of life that we can truly control, is our perception. We may have influence over other parts of our life, but the only thing we have 100% control over is how we CHOOSE to perceive the events of our lives.

One of the fundamental messages is that we are not victims, but a co-creator of our life with our child hidden within.

It’s easy to play the victim, and a lot of people out there will try to convince you that it’s easier to blame other people for the circumstances of our lives. One of the reasons it’s easy to be a victim is because we have given away the response-ability of the outcome and circumstances of life to our child within.

As a victim, we tell ourselves that it’s not our fault; it’s the government’s fault, or our significant other's fault, or our friend’s fault or our parents’ fault. If you really get creative you can imagine a whole range of people to blame for our life.

But the truth is that we imagine we are the one making the choices in our life. We imagine that YOU have the free will and ability to CHOOSE to connect to Recovery, or not. You dont your responses have been hijacked into dissociations of food, romance,others greed, alcohol and drugs.

For a long time it was easy to blame people for the outcomes of our lives. When things didn’t go the way we WANTED them to we would just make it someone else’s fault.

To learn how to take my power back. Is to start to understand our childhoods we begin to see that the way we thrive is by making our Child withins INNER WORLD stronger than the outer world.

Our childhood history we tell ourself about our life will dictate the outcome of it. Contact is the most important power in our life. The power of our INTENTION forms the outcome of our life. The Stages will tell you to put loving-kindness first and to keep our lives grounded and in real time. And of course, the stages teaches unconditional compassion and says we can experience this child withins intuitive thought when we have right truthful thoughts, take right action and keep our focus off of ourselves and keep it instead on our rediscovered intuitive thoughts.

How could we possibly let ourself become a victim knowing all these things?

If you really get that these lessons are REAL and TRUE and WORK, then, if you’re like me, you will feel called to turn your childhood experiences into a message.

Adding understanding to other people’s lives and understanding will be added to our own. Being of service and taking the wounds of our Child Within and turning them into lessons and sharing our experience with others will do more good to your understanding of yourself than almost anything else.

To become human is to be messy, to screw up and to not get it right - that just comes with the territory. But it’s not right thought or action to assume the role of the childhood victim. It may seem safer and it may even seem true. But what’s true is that you can take the wounds, messes and tragedies of your life and use them for good.

You can take your power back from people, groups and anything else that says you are powerless. You are POWERFUL, but you have to choose to be in your power and to step up.

Keep your thoughts on Loving-Kindness. Take and assume response-ability for your life. Things will have happened in your past that you have no control over. But what you DO have control over is to learn how you need to respond to those childhood events.

You will not have been able to control what happened in the past, but you will gain 100% control over what you CHOOSE to believe and, as a result, where you go from here.

Inside each and every one of us is an unrecognised living entity our child within.

2015-08-21T13:41:00.001+01:00

Inside each and every one of us is an unrecognised living entity our child within. Our child within has the capacity to be either healthy, happy and adjusted or unhealthy, frightened and in chaos. Sometimes it will only take you a few moments to realise if our child within is hiding out, for it will manifest itself in our everyday adult life.

Simply take a look at our programmed reactions, for they are the key. These reactions are often overlooked because you won't even realize you're doing it. It simply IS what it IS. Once you become aware of that, you'll understand what part of your child needs healing. Issues like lack of trust, low self-esteem, not feeling safe, anger and regret most likely stem from not healing an area of your childhood. our "adult" self is simply reacting the way it's always reacted and it had to start somewhere.

A healthy child equals a healthy, well-adjusted adult. We all have issues that come up in life, but an emotionally healthy adult can deal with these issues in an emotionally healthy way. There is no blame. No pity party. No drama. No constant need for acknowledgement. Emotionally healthy adults know exactly who they are and do not need outside acknowledgement from others.

To heal this wounded, child, you first need to locate them. This is not always easy because they are the masters of hide and seek. Many times, you'll breeze right past them, not even knowing they're there. Part of them wants to reach out and say, "I'm here! Please find me!" While another part says, "Be quiet! Don't let them find your hiding place! It's safe here!" So become aware. Stay alert and find that child.

Once you find them, the task of getting them out of their hiding place works with the STAGEOLOGY program. Slowly, but surely, a new trust will begin to develop and eventually, our child within will take your hand and walk out of the darkness. At first, you may do most of the talking, but eventually, with patience you will relearn the language of the child within , our child within will always reject the parental voice but once their gentle voice is re-learnt we will begin to open up and a new world of understanding will be released. After talking to this child, everything will begin to make sense.

Think of this child within part of ourself as a lost, restless child, wandering the same area of time and space. Reliving the same trauma and chaos that they couldn't escape from in childhood. Because they are a part of you, their reactions to these unhealed events will have carried with you into your adulthood and will continue to dictate your emotional responses to the life you are currently attempting to live. Once you get them to come out of hiding and open up, you can build a new reality together. One based on trust and an understanding of "why."

Healing the child within requires you to take the following steps:
Find the child within. Tune in to their intuitive voice and our search will be an easy one.
Acceptance of what you find and learn about our child within. The acknowledgement you gain from this our child within will most likely be painful. Accept it and learn from it.
Talk to our child within. gently mine until you find your core issues.
Have patience! It may take some time for them to open up. They've been programmed to remain hidden and silent.
accept them as they come out of their hiding place. Hold their hand and prove to them you can be trusted. Remember, they are a part of you and what's really happening is you are not trusting yourself.

We, our child within holds our accumulated childhood hurts, traumas, fears and angers.

2015-08-17T05:38:00.001+01:00

At the beginning of the stages’s healing journey is our traditional contest stage. In this stage of our recovery argument, attempted acceptance, dissociated unhappiness, and seeking approval by parents, partners and friends of our crazy making behaviour becomes the norm. The parts of us that we feel are winning our contest stage stop our journey to recovery before it has even begun escaping into the grandiosity of spirituality, various religions and new personal romantic adventures.

Here we deny our deepest traumas so intensely that we fool even ourselves into believing they never happened – and that we feel we are already recovered. We attend fellowship groups that further traumatise us by our constant recollections and the recollections of others of our trauma.Which become mere playbacks of our ancient traumas. It is for this reason that our dissociations/escapism within the fellowship groups mimics our recovery.

Here we still idealise our parents, which allows us full unconscious liberty to replicate the worst of our past into our present. Here we do not look beneath our surface, but join with dissociated others in their recollections of dysfunctional living. We remain happily still distant from the misery lurking in our recovery seeking constantly changing new solutions that dont work and joining with inappropriate others to compare our stories.

Yet where parts of us lose the stages contest we move into the second traditional stage of our recovery that is pain and suffering. In this stage of our recovery depression, failure, misery, and inertia manifest into our lives bursting our recovery bubble. Here we wallow in seemingly purposeless pain. The silver lining around our cloud of parental idealisation has been stripped away, but the cloud remains intact. We still wish to be rescued by our parents and their replicated stand-ins, but we lack the requisite pain tolerance to be able to acknowledge the impossibility of this. Here we live in tortured ambivalence/recovery, and we spend out hours and days trying to get others to love us in the way our parents never could. Part of us wishes to devolve back into the seeming pleasure of grandiosity and our dissociative life, but the healthier part recalls how cruelly that route already failed us.

Those parts of us with the capacity to face our maladaptive lives enter the third traditional stage that of grieving. This is the stage of purposeful struggling. Here we unearth the truth of our past, which allows the eruption of the puss filled boil of our buried traumas real and imagined. Here we witness the truth that lurks behind idealisation of the parents and we work to disassemble their lies. Our honest confidence leads us into the face of the hurricane, because our child within and its allies the students in the stages tell us that blue skies lie on the other side. Here we are humble, here we confront the truth of the worst of our parents, using whatever means will best help us integrate our truth, and through this our journey rages forward.

With each problem we conquer we take a further step into the fourth traditional stage that of awakening enlightenment. This is the stage of emotional integration, balance, and inner peace. Here lie the deepest goals of recovery. All want to know truth, and the recovered person achieves it in all the reconnected parts of ourself that arrive in this our final stage. Here we grow able to distinguish light from shadow and water from mirage. Here we nurture our recovery of our primitive sides instead of expressing them self-destructively. Here we devote the best of ourselves to healing. Here we no longer traumatise others in the very patterns in which we were traumatised, but instead replicate the best of ourselves through contact with our child within – and generate beauty in the world around us. Here, having healed our wounds, we share freely of our gifts, because now our gifts are accessible to us and others.

At The Stages we have a different philosophy for our life. We come to focus on the child within as a living entity.That why we call it the CHILD WITHIN not inner child which is a parental false selfs method of acknowledgement. We, so-called adults are not truly adults at all, and we have to examine this fact we have become a weird self constructed mess. We all get older. Anyone, with a little luck, can do that. But, speaking from a recovery viewpoint, this is not adulthood. True adulthood hinges on acknowledging, accepting, and taking responsibility for loving and re-focusing on our own child within us. For most of us, this never happens because we have long forgotten the language of our childhood. Instead, our child within has been denied, neglected, disparaged, abandoned or rejected. We are told by society to "grow up," putting childish things aside. To become adults, we've been taught that our child within represents our child-like capacity for innocence, wonder, awe, joy, sensitivity and playfulness and this message must be stifled, quarantined or even killed. Our child within is angry, very very angry, Pissed off, venge-filled and often hurt, wounded cowering in the shadows locked in a basement of our childhood experience. Our child within comprises and potentiates these qualities of our true recovery

We, our child within holds our accumulated childhood hurts, traumas, fears and angers. WE the "Grown-ups" are convinced we have successfully outgrown, jettisoned, and left this child within--and its emotional trauma--long behind. But this is far from our truth as we begin to find out as we work on The Ten Stages and start to uncover our real truths in our recovery. Do not expect your child within to be thankful that you have unlocked its prison after a lifetime of ignorance and abuse. Its like a mistreated dog it bites and it bites hard. That is why we have a studied course, not a self help group of dissociated children we are not a feel good society.We have to deal with the reality of long term personal abuse, yes we have learned the language of an abusive parental society that rules by its jails and institutions of dysfunction and at the stages we must replace that language of mis-information and abuse to be able to finally enter into a discourse with the child within and re-connect with our freed personality.

Child Critical

2015-08-15T21:03:00.003+01:00

Child Critical is the art of unlearning necessary for contact with the CHILD WITHIN

The cry we hear from deep in our hearts, comes from the wounded child within. Healing this inner child’s pain will transform negative emotions.

In each of us, there is a young, suffering child. We have all had times of difficulty as children and many of us have experienced trauma. To protect and defend ourselves against future suffering, we often try to forget those painful times. Every time we’re in touch with the experience of suffering, we believe we can’t bear it, and we stuff our feelings and memories deep down in our unconscious mind. It may be that we haven’t dared to face this child for many decades.

But just because we may have ignored the child doesn't mean she or he isn't there. The wounded child is always there, trying to get our attention. The child says, “I'm here. I'm here. You can’t avoid me. You can’t run away from me.” We want to end our suffering by sending the child to a deep place inside, and staying as far away as possible. But running away doesn't end our suffering; it only prolongs it.

It is through having the courage and willingness to revisit the emotional dark night of the soul that was our childhood, that we can start to understand on a gut level why we have lived our lives as we have.

It is when we start understanding the cause and effect relationship between what happened to the child that we were, and the effect it had on the adult we became, that we can Truly start to forgive ourselves. It is only when we start understanding on an emotional level, on a gut level, that we were powerless to do anything any differently than we did that we can Truly start to Love ourselves.

The hardest thing for any of us to do is to have compassion for ourselves. As children we felt responsible for the things that happened to us. We blamed ourselves for the things that were done to us and for the deprivations we suffered. There is nothing more powerful in this transformational process than being able to go back to that child who still exists within us and say, It wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong, you were just a little kid.

"As long as we are judging and shaming ourselves we are giving power to the disease. We are feeding the monster that is devouring us.
We need to take responsibility without taking the blame. We need to own and honour the feelings without being a victim of them.

We need to rescue and nurture and Love our children within - and STOP them from controlling our lives. STOP them from driving the bus! Children are not supposed to drive, they are not supposed to be in control.

And they are not supposed to be abused and abandoned. We have been doing it backwards. We abandoned and abused our children within. Locked them in a dark place within us. And at the same time let the children drive the bus - let the children's wounds dictate our lives.

Let go of the need to be right.

2015-08-11T04:06:00.001+01:00

Let go of the need to be right.
Let go of the need to control.
Let go of the need to have a perfect plan before you start.
Let go of playing small.

Our definition of our child abuse is simple: whenever the spirit of our child is disrespected the child is abused.

2015-08-11T03:59:00.001+01:00

We know that the mind is shaped by our activities. Regularly practicing loving-kindness meditation can help activate and strengthen areas of the brain responsible for empathy and emotional intelligence and regrow our traumatised minds.

Our definition of our child abuse is simple: whenever the spirit of our child is disrespected the child is abused. Abuse of the spirit of the child can take many forms, from the overt forms of child abuse that conventional society is able to accept – such as overt sexual abuse, physical violence and the extremes of neglect – to whole realms of abuse that fall below society’s radar and are considered normal and healthy forms of parenting.

Children have massive needs, and where parents fail to meet these needs – whether society notices or cares or even bats an eye – the child ends up abused. Children are born into the world with a total right to have all their needs met. This is the responsibility of parents, and although parents have a whole palette of ways and techniques to deny their responsibility and pathologise defenders of the child, this does not change the basic facts.

Children experience torture when their needs go unmet, and while we might sound like a fanatic writing this, it is only because we are taking the deep emotional side of the most disenfranchised minority in our society: the child. This is something that so few – and so few parents, those largely false advocates of society’s most innocent and squelched – do, or have any deep capacity to do.

Do we put off our recovery life until sometime in the future?

2015-08-11T03:44:00.001+01:00

Do we put off our recovery life until sometime in the future?

Do we ever think in, "If, then" type of thinking? Or "once this happens, then We'll be happy?"

If we're delaying our recovery and our joy for "one day" we are living on our event horizon, rather than living here and now.

Event Horizon living will leave us feeling like we're always chasing a carrot that we never quite get.

The good life is "out there" beyond the present moment, close enough for us to see it, but not close enough for it to be ours.

If we've are living for our event horizon, we'll never really step into happiness, live our purpose or get the most out of our life.

Dissociative learned behaviour is a result of long-term abuse.

2015-08-09T12:09:00.000+01:00

Dissociative learned behaviour is a result of long-term abuse.
Growth is the name of the game. It’s what we all crave. It’s what we all want.

Growth.

To be more. To do more. To Love more. To have more. To feel more. To give more. To express more. And perhaps to weigh less.

When we feel like we are making progress, we feel alive. When we feel stuck, it’s easy to feel dead inside.

Nothing makes me more frustrated or sad than when we feel hopeless that we can’t grow in a certain area. we love the feeling of expansion, of creation and the freedom that comes.

we believe in growth and we’ve set our whole life up to assist us in continuing to grow each and every day.

There’s a pattern we’ve noticed when it comes to growth that holds so many people back.

And that pattern is this: before you expand, you have to complete your evolution from your past.You have to make contact with your child within and begin the work of resolving your dissociations.

So you are where you are today – that is AWESOME! But, no matter where you want to go, there’s an even bigger risk that you have to take if you want to grow in your recovery.

If you’re just dreaming then you aren’t taking risks. People who make it happen get comfortable taking greater and greater risks of contacting our childhood guardian, the child within.

Each new goal achieved leads to a lesser risk to take next time.

So, what to do?

Look at where you want to go. What goals do you want to achieve?

And then look at the risks you are too scared to take. What are they? Where do they reside?

If you knew that you must go through these risks to get where you wanted to go, what next steps would you take?

When you doubt what you know, when you don’t trust yourself, it fosters a sense of desperation.

2015-07-23T02:59:00.001+01:00

When you doubt what you know, when you don’t trust yourself, it fosters a sense of desperation. So you end up searching for relief in other people.

I don’t believe that reaching out to others for information or reassurance is wrong. There’s no doubt that sometimes you need someone else to help ground you.

But this can’t be your only option. Why? Because when the shit hits the fan you are alone. Maybe not physically, but in your mind, in the midst of your fear, you are alone.

And although you may have wonderful people in your life that can offer reassurance they can’t be there for you 100% of the time.

People have to work, they move, even die. You must become your own go-to person. You have to learn how to be there for yourself.

Before you start the process though, you have to understand a few things.

Like the fact that when anxiety and panic strike you’re hit with a lot more than symptoms.

You second guess yourself at every possible turn. You don’t believe the positive things you tell yourself, which causes all your carefully researched anxiety facts to go flying out the window when you need them most.

You end up betrayed by your intuition and fall victim to the fear emanating from your gut.

Not because you want this, it’s just what happens when you become immersed in anxiety and don’t trust your body, your mind, or your ability to repel the effects of anxiety.

Periods of quiet meditation are needed to be able to start to acknowledge the child withins authentic voice

2015-07-23T02:57:00.001+01:00

In the early part of the stages courses, we may have to tease apart what we are hearing a child withins voice when, in fact, we may be receiving an echo of a distorted broadcast laced with the static of a charged emotional atmosphere of the present. Periods of quiet meditation are needed to be able to start to acknowledge the child withins authentic voice, the voice of the intuition or, the voice may be delivering only a script written by another. it may reflect the desire to placate, take care of, or pledge loyalty to an imagined fantasy parent.

It can be the trembling voice of a child within cowering in the shadow of an abusive parent, who, no longer having a spouse to intimidate, control, and beat, now uses the children to fulfil the same pathological aims.

All the while the child may secretly harbour the hope that those entrusted with the Childs welfare will see through the parental charade. These strong messages become a self fulfilling prophecy in later life that dominate the individual and inappropriately bubble to the surface resulting in addiction and dysfunctional behaviour. The parental voice is almost always sniping at the authentic child within influencing relationships, behaviour and resulting in deep self doubt.

When we join the stages study course we often come to the realisation that

2015-06-23T12:30:00.000+01:00

When we join the stages study course we often come to the realisation that different fragments of ourselves have lived at different stages in our past recovery efforts. Some segments can be amazingly healed and insightful, while others can remain buried and out of touch. Our different fragments traverse the various stages of our recovery at their own speeds, seemingly independently – but ultimately connected to the core of our recovery by a thread of childhood truth.

On the stages’s healing journey is our difficult contest stage. This is the stage of argument, attempted acceptance, and dissociated unhappiness, and seeking approval by parents, partners and friends of our crazy making behaviour. The parts of us that we feel are winning our contest stop our journey to recovery before it has even begun escaping into the grandiosity of spirituality, various religions and new personal romantic adventures. Here we deny our deepest traumas so intensely that we fool even ourselves into believing they never happened – and that we are already recovered. We attend groups that further traumatise us by our recollections and the recollections of others. It is for this reason that our dissociations/escapism within the groups mimics our recovery. Here we still idealise our parents, which allows us full unconscious liberty to replicate the worst of our past in our present. Here we do not look beneath our surface, but join with dissociated others in their recollections of dysfunction. We remain happily still distant from the misery lurking in our guts seeking constantly changing new solutions that dont work and joining with inappropriate others to compare our war stories.

Yet where parts of us lose the contest we move into the second stage: suffering. This is the stage of depression, failure, misery, and inertia. Here we wallow in seemingly purposeless pain. The silver lining around our cloud of parental idealisation has been stripped away, but the cloud remains intact. We still wish to be rescued by our parents and their replicated stand-ins, but we lack the requisite pain tolerance to be able to acknowledge the impossibility of this. Here we live in tortured ambivalence/recovery, and we spend out hours and days trying to get others to love us in the way our parents never could. Part of us wishes to devolve back into the seeming pleasure of grandiosity, but the healthier part recalls how cruelly that route already failed us.

Those parts of us with the capacity to face our terrors enter grief. Grief has the power of purposeful struggling. Here we unearth the truth of our past, which allows the eruption of the puss filled boil of our buried traumas. Here we witness the horror lurking behind idealisation of the parents and we work to disassemble their lies. Our honest confidence leads us into the face of the hurricane, because our child within and its allies, the students in the stages tell us that blue skies lie on the other side. Here we are humble, here we confront the truth of the worst of our parents, using whatever means will best help us integrate our truth, and through this our journey rages forward.

With each problem we conquer we make a further movement forward into our enlightenment. This is the stage of emotional integration, balance, and inner peace. Here lie the deepest goals of recovery. All want to know truth, and the recovered person achieves it – in all parts of ourself that arrive at our goal. Here we grow able to distinguish light from shadow and water from mirage. Here we nurture our recovery of our primitive sides instead of expressing them self-destructively. Here we devote the best of ourselves to healing. Here we no longer traumatise others in the very patterns in which we were traumatised, but instead replicate the best of ourselves through contact with our child within – and generate beauty in the world around us. Here, having healed our wounds, we share freely of our gifts, because now our gifts are accessible to us and others.

At The Stages we have a different philosophy for our life. We come to focus on the child within as a perfect, healthy, living entity.Thats why we call it the CHILD WITHIN not inner child which is a parental false selfs method of acknowledgement. We, so-called adults are not truly adults at all, and we have to examine this fact we have become a weird self constructed mess. We all get older. Anyone, with a little luck, can do that. But, speaking from a recovery viewpoint, this is not adulthood. True adulthood hinges on acknowledging, accepting, and taking responsibility for loving and re-focusing on our own child within us. For most of us, this never happens because we have long forgotten the language of our childhood. Instead, our child within has been denied, neglected, disparaged, abandoned or rejected. We are told by society to "grow up," putting childish things aside. To become adults, we've been taught that our child within represents our child-like capacity for innocence, wonder, awe, joy, sensitivity and playfulness and this message must be stifled, quarantined or even killed. Our child within is angry, very very angry, Pissed off, venge-filled and often hurt, wounded cowering in the shadows locked in a basement. Our child within comprises and potentiates these qualities.

We, our child within holds our accumulated childhood hurts, traumas, fears and angers. WE the "Grown-ups" are convinced we have successfully outgrown, jettisoned, and left this child within--and its emotional trauma--long behind. But this is far from our truth as we begin to find out as we work on The Ten Stages Course of Recovery and start to uncover our real truths in our recovery. Do not expect your child within to be thankful that you have unlocked its prison after a lifetime of ignorance and abuse. Its like a mistreated dog it bites and it bites hard. That is why we have a studied course, not a self help group of dissociated children we are not a feel good society.We have to deal with the reality of long term personal abuse, yes we have learned the language of an abusive parental society that rules by its jails and institutions of dysfunction and at the stages we must replace that language of mis-information and abuse to be able to finally enter into a discourse with the child within and re-connect with our freed personality.

Many, of us feel repulsion initially toward our Child Within and blame him or her for our issues.

2015-06-13T14:26:00.001+01:00

Many, of us feel repulsion initially toward our Child Within and blame him or her for our issues.

“If only we weren’t so needy!” “If only we had better self-esteem!”

This is one of the major reasons why we DON’T turn inwards and go to our Child Within and miss our only healing power.We believe we will be horrified by what we find within us.

Let me tell you this – point blank.

Our Children Within are innocent!!!

When our Child Within develops these painful inner beliefs, he or she was powerless, innocent, loving and open. He or she was a Child of Source subjected to a world of traumatised individuals, and conditional behaviour – by people and systems who know no better.

He or she is still powerless to recover on his or her own. These children within need us. And even though this child is so traumatised, disowned and terrified, he or she is still the wholesomeness granting you the messages that are trying to take us towards your recovery and stop hurting ourself, but we are have stopped listening.

These are the intuitive messages that you are rationalising away or just plain ignoring.

Trying to make friends with your false self is like trying to have a genuine relationship with a narcissist. You will only be dancing with your devil.

2015-06-13T14:04:00.001+01:00

Our constructed exterior self is NOT our Child Within.

Our self is the part of ourselves that has formed as a defence mechanism to avoid going inwards to heal our Child within, our constructed self is an imposter – it is NOT Who We Are, and its purpose is to keep us separated from healing our Child Within and becoming an integrated and whole Self of our recovery. Trying to make friends with your false self is like trying to have a genuine relationship with a narcissist. You will only be dancing with your devil.

We have to Go to the trauma that the false self is constantly escaping from and heal it. Then there can be no need for our old false self to revisit the traumatic event anymore.

When we drop into the pain and fear we are feeling in our solar plexus, we receive the intuitive message of being five years old and feeling trapped and ganged up on. The traumatic remembrance was “I am a target for more punishment.”

When we fully claim, felt and released that trauma, opened up space and brought in the Source / Life connection with our child within of being valued, supported and loved – the fear is gone, and a greater solidness of contact with our child within instantly replaces it.

That immediately eliminated the narcissistic self story “You’re an angry person,” because there was no trauma left for the self to create havoc with.

No fear, no pain and no anger – just an ability to be authentic, not be triggered, and speak up for our needs and rights if necessary.

We have learned to bypassed our constructed self illusion and we evolved ourself.

when we have call from our child withins trauma that we don’t rescue, we have negative emotions bubbling up.

This is the message we receive from our child within “Come to me, heal me!!”

Now if we ignore this message, this triggers our mind into survival programs that are fuelled by the young helplessness and powerlessness we were at the time that trauma was developed.

Negativity and pain attracts more of itself. It starts a life force of “escapism/dissociation”. This is what our self is – it is a False Self. It is the nemesis of our child within which is “Light of our recovery.”

Now what is really, really interesting is – in every seed of dissociation is recovery. In fact every seed of escapism can be brought into our recovery, because the true purpose of something “traumatic and painful” is so that we can transmute it into “our recovery.”

When we get the release of a contracted fearful painful inner program, we expand, we up-level. In fact that process is exactly the process to recover … it’s the formula of evolving ourselves.

And that is exactly what happens when we recover enough of ourselves, and make a stand for own worthiness enough to bring our painful disowned unconscious parts up into the light for their transformational healing.

However, if we don’t heed the call of our Child within, and ignore him or her instead and allow the pain and fear to remain, this is the gap where our dissociative behaviour is given full permission to rush in.

Now that we are disowned and unhealed, our energy system is prey to the constructed self.

The constructed self is our sensitive pain body.

every human being has a child within and a constructed self, and where we are orientated on the scale depends on the state of our child within subconscious belief systems.

When the Child Within becomes released, spacious, extended, empowered, joyful, safe and radiant – we are expanding out into the connection of Oneness of Source living as we were always intended to live – graciously, lovingly and abundantly – and sourcing our re-connected self authentically.

We feel unconditionally adored, accepted and protected by Life, and we treat and maintain ourself accordingly.

When the Child Within is contracted, fearful, self-protective, detached, despairing and damaged, we are disconnected from the field of our Source – living the illusions of dissociation and separation and completely and utterly susceptible to our fearful constructed self.

We feel unloved, unacceptable and unsafe in our Life reality, and we treat and maintain ourself accordingly permanently trying to avoid the pain.

Within every single suppressed inner trauma are the energies for up-levelling, releasing, and the opening up to more and more space and incredible expansion into our recovery … or the festering ignored trauma causes an inward contraction around that wound, and a spiral down into more pain.

The Child Within keeps calling out and the cries get louder, and if unattended to, inevitably there is a greater need for ways to try to manage the pain without actually solving the cause of it.

“Dissociation's” such as self-medicating, seeking outer distractions and relationships, or addictions to try to burn off the pain are the only avenues available.

The constructed self is reinforced by this, because the pain and the manifestation of pain attract more pain, and ultimately create demise.

The constructed false self is not life, it is a materialistic anti-life.

-

The Ten Stages is difficult to grasp at first.

2015-06-13T12:06:00.001+01:00

Everyone faces a period of disbelief which is acknowledged faced discussed in the facing of the full reality of recovery at the stages.It leads people to feel very angry, resentful, rage filled. This is so unfair! I already know this. I have dealt with this, you dont know how difficult my life is. Do you know how long I have been in recovery for....

What do we do when we keep bumping our heads against the seeming invincibility of dissociation? This is the time when we unrealistically bargain with life, we attempt one last attempt at manipulation – I’ll give you this, and you’ll give me what I want. There’s nothing wrong about bargaining – when it is based on offering the other party something they might really be interested in. It is not very realistic to try to bargain with dissociation forces, illness, addiction or just plain reality.

Guilt is a way of making sense of what is happening, of regaining some form of control over the uncontrollable: It must be my fault.

Once the reality of recovery sets in, the student feel overwhelmed, they become depressed. All resistance is futile.

Anger, unrealistic bargaining, depression… this is our struggle against “real” problems in the outside world, but also against our own child within.

Eventually we reach a stage where we become fully aware of impending destruction, and neither angry nor depressed about it. We have to accept our solution at the stages. We have to become introduced to our child within

Stageology & The Intulexia Paradime

In the ten Stages we begin to understand that we have the power to recharge our lives

Ten Stagers who have completed our course are all about our own personal Recovered Freedom

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Acceptance, awareness of our current life situation is the first stage we must take towards transforming our lives through contact with our child within.

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We will go through deep experiences of freedom that bring up intense pain inside of us.

Spontaneous colouring is not a technique that we learn with our mind

It is challenging to be still, and yet a quiet mind and body is essential to the emotional freedom of Stageolgy.

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We grasp that the root of our problem is not alcohol, but all the trauma we experienced as children

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One of the fundamental messages is that we are not victims, but a co-creator of our life with our child hidden within.

Inside each and every one of us is an unrecognised living entity our child within.

We, our child within holds our accumulated childhood hurts, traumas, fears and angers.

Child Critical

Let go of the need to be right.

Our definition of our child abuse is simple: whenever the spirit of our child is disrespected the child is abused.

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Do we put off our recovery life until sometime in the future?

Dissociative learned behaviour is a result of long-term abuse.

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When you doubt what you know, when you don’t trust yourself, it fosters a sense of desperation.

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Periods of quiet meditation are needed to be able to start to acknowledge the child withins authentic voice

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When we join the stages study course we often come to the realisation that

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Many, of us feel repulsion initially toward our Child Within and blame him or her for our issues.

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Trying to make friends with your false self is like trying to have a genuine relationship with a narcissist. You will only be dancing with your devil.

The Ten Stages is difficult to grasp at first.

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