Adventures of This Girl

Liar Liar Pants on Fire

2012-03-26T20:44:00.002-04:00

So I know that it's been forever since I posted...but I've actually been busy. I've been dating!! I know..why did I give that exclamation points? It's not that great...more crazy than anything...and of course, work got super busy.

But I have been doing it and I'll back up and tell you all about them. But in the meantime, I'm trying to come up with a good story as to why I don't want to go out on another date with this guy. He called while I was at yoga and I need to call him back. He's persistent.

Oh I so wish I was still on vacation...yes I took a little vacation last Thursday and came home last night. It was so relaxing. I'm so good at unplugging.

Maybe I reconnected with someone? On my trip???

Back in the Saddle Again...J

2012-02-21T20:42:00.003-05:00

Yes kids, I went on a date. Somebody had to break the dry spell. And the first guy that asked me to coffee got to be Mr. J.

Mr. J. What do I say? He was nice. He was polite. He was foreign - a former Communist. And that's about it. There were no sparks. No flirting. No fun conversation. It wasn't bad conversation. There was just none of that special something that made me excited for more.

I wore a cute but casual date outfit to coffee. We spent just over an hour together and then I had to go but I think he was ready to go too. Like end this on a good note.

Will there be a second date? Probably not. I just don't have the time. There are other letters to add to my list.

Oh one thing I have to note: As we were talking he often crossed his arms over his chest, which was fine because I could tell that he was satisfied and fine, but I think any body language expert would say it's definitely a closed-off body expression. It's just a weird thing you notice as you are pretending to listen ( I swear I listen - I can just multi-task).

Happy Valentine's Day?

2012-02-14T20:33:00.002-05:00

Sorry I've not been consistently posting, but surprisingly in the last week, I've been super popular on Match.com. I'm trying to stay on top of it. The hour and half commute tonight didn't really help.

Anyway, I have a story from yesterday. Yes, the day before the infamous holiday of love. I don't hate Valentine's Day. I exchange gifts with my parents and send a few Valentines to some of my single girlfriends. Love isn't always romantic.

So I had an appointment to see my dermatologist yesterday. I had run out of a prescription and needed a new one. He wouldn't just call it in to the pharmacy so I had to spend 10 minutes with him and get my little piece of paper.

So as he finished up writing in my chart, he says to me, "How old are you?" I tell him, "33." And he says, "Well, do you have any..." Before he could finish his sentence, I say to him, "Don't worry I'm not planning on getting pregnant or on the Pill." It was a legit answer - the medication interferes with the Pill and you shouldn't take it while pregnant. He's asked it before.

And then he says, "Well that wasn't what I was going to ask. I was going to ask if you had any valentines tomorrow." Huh? I stuttered, looking for an answer, "Well not really. I mean my parents are my Valentine, I guess". So awkward. I wasn't even sure what he was asking me. I was so confused. He made his exit shortly after my faux pas.

After I ran out of his office, I was thinking why did he ask my age before he strangely asked me about my valentines? What does my age have to do with it? Do old women not have valentines or young girls? I didn't think it was a age-specific day.

Or was he trying to hit on me? Awkward. I've been going to him since I was in high school. He's not ancient, but he's not a young buck either.

Oh well, I don't have a follow-up appointment to see where this is headed.

News flash

2012-02-07T22:01:00.004-05:00

Today I was reading The Washington Post online (as usual) and an article popped up. Well, not exactly this article, but this one links to the article that I read.

It's an article reporting on a new study about online dating and the success of it. Here's the link. Basically, it says what anyone who has online dated knows. It's a total crapshoot. It's all luck.

So look at it what it is just another way for people to meet each other. Be open to everyone. Well, not everyone, but it makes me wonder if you don't have to have everything in common then am I missing out on the guys I should be dating?

I planned on writing about something else, but I just had to share this article and I got distracted reading Match.com profiles. Wish me luck. No takers yet.

Mixing it up...

2012-02-03T21:13:00.003-05:00

So I just cancelled my eHarmony subscription. Woo Hoo! Last minute game change.

Of course, it doesn't turn off right away. I still have a month. So I sent out a bunch of smiles (whatever that is...)

I just waste so much money with it. Instead of using the same old same old profile, I'm cancelling and starting over. New year, new profile. Right?

I promise it's not the tequila I'm drinking. It's not that strong...I swear! I think it's the haircut. I don't get it cut very often.

Songwriters are my heros

2012-02-02T21:38:00.002-05:00

Sunday night, I went wild and drove to the city an hour away to see a show at the local music club. My friend J came with and we had a fabulous dinner with plenty of alcohol ahead of time. And rocked the tunes up loud in the car on the way home in the late night hours.

Love being crazy and staying out late on a school night!

So Matt Nathanson was the headliner and he sang the title track off his current album, Modern Love.

He told us that he wrote this song after talking to a single lady friend about her dating life and after hearing that and really listening to the lyrics (instead of skipping over like usual). It's now my new favorite song. He got it so right...songwriters are my heros.

Check it out...

What have I been up to???

2012-01-28T20:47:00.003-05:00

I've been up to this before noon today.

It was delicious and potent. Thank you Jenna at Eat, Live, Run

I ate it with her guacamole. And then I took the weirdest nap. It was that stupid Spinning with the Oldies and the tequila.

It was a party for 1!

Last week was kind of crazy. Work has been really busy. But I've had some bright spots. Last night, I had people over to my house for a get-together. It was just my siblings and cousins. But it was a step. My friend Amy wants me to add to my life list that I need to have a party at my house. It was a big step.

Another big step was that I started to free up my schedule. I used to have two volunteer gigs. I volunteer twice a week coaching adults in distance running. This winter/spring, it's half marathon/marathon. Well, I resigned from the other one. That was volunteering for the USO. It was a good gig and it's a great organization. It was just too much. Too much on the schedule. The funny thing was I was at the USO working when I read an article by Bethenny Frankel about how women overschedule themselves and then don't have time to go out.

And you know what? She's right! So that was the icing on the cake. I resigned. And then work got busy and my sister needed IT help at her house.

Sometimes you just can't win.

Let me Re-Introduce Myself

2012-01-17T20:35:00.003-05:00

My name is Miss Scarlett. And I am an unsuccessful blogger. Well I used to be successful. And I mean successful in the fact that I was having fun, writing posts, going on dates, and tallying up material.

And then I got busy. Busy with other things. With friends and family. My job and running. You see I don't get paid for this and I have other interests. I'm actually a certified distance running coach. I completed three half marathons and a 5K in the span of 3 months from September to December. I also was a bridesmaid in 2 weddings during that same period.

You see, busy. I kept saying I'd get back into, but I never did. But here I am. I need to do this. I need to get back into dating. He's not going to come knocking on my doorstep.

But there is a difference this time. I'm not as concerned about if it ever happens. I mean, don't get me wrong. I want it to happen, but if I never meet the one and I never get married, I'm ok with it. It's not meant to be. And I will be ok.

So let's go. Let's start again.

I've held it in too long

2011-10-31T21:38:00.003-04:00

I've held in my feelings for a long time about this, but something just put me over the edge today.

Can we talk about the eHarmony commercials? The happy couples who are laughing and hugging about how easy it was that they met each other on eHarmony. Well now it's morphed into a single guy who only just got on eHarmony and he's only had one date. This is the line that kills me, "By the time this airs, I'll probably have met someone special."

Seriously! Seriously! Every time I see these commercials I want to throw up. It's false advertising. Their system is no better at matching you than any of the other sites out there. I don't know anyone who has used internet dating sites who met their boyfriend/girlfriend in 2 dates.

Yes, these people probably met each other on the website. But do you really think you are reaching single people with these commercials? No. I'm telling you eHarmony. You aren't.

And then when you send me my matches, I've noticed that it's pretty much all in the same category: single dads age 40 and above. That's at least 7 years older than I am. Is there no guy out there closer to my age that would be a match? This seems very suspicious. I'll play your little game and talk to a few of them.

So you know what eHarmony...you are on probation. I'm watching you. You better shape up or I'm shipping out.

What's been going on....

2011-10-20T19:29:00.003-04:00

In my hiatus, I have been very busy. I want to give a special congratulations to my reader Carrie and her new husband, Matt. They had beautiful wedding in early October. The pictures are amazing, but that's what you get when the bride is an art director and partner in a design firm. Those lucky ducks are on their way back from 10 days in Kauai. Awful people!!! The pictures are terrible...

Anyway, I wanted to share their story to illustrate the point that love can find you anywhere. They met at a WordCamp, which is an event put on throughout the world to bring Word Press users together. Anyway, they started tweeting one another. And they tweeted and tweeted. I happened to be travelling with her in Amsterdam that June shortly after they met. And I could see how excited she was every time she got a tweet from him. I had to pry her away from the phone sometimes to go out and see the sights. I remember telling her to go for it with this guy. I could just tell something was different. She was so excited. Even if it didn't work work out, it was worth the time and effort. She was so smitten. And evidently so was he. After we came back, they had a real date and the rest was history. A year later, they were engaged. And now they are married.

So congratulations! Enjoy the ride!

Homework

2011-10-18T20:53:00.002-04:00

Yes, I'm assigning homework. I wanted to assign it over the weekend, but it didn't happen. I haven't even prepped for the homework. So this is going to force us both. (Full disclosure: I have started the homework - I just need to finish it.)

So read this article. It's interesting. And we'll discuss in a day or two.

All the Single Ladies - The Atlantic

Awkward Coincidence

2011-10-18T20:48:00.002-04:00

I had to share this funny story told to me by a new contributor (hopefully), Miss Indy. She has some equally fun adventures in dating.

Recently, she went out with a guy she met on an internet dating website. He had a very upbeat, smiling, happy profile on the site. So they talked and decided to go out.

When she meets him, he looks very down. Where was this happy guy? She was confused, but he didn't say anything so the date went on. Dinner was eaten and a movie was the activity post-dinner. She said she suggested the movie "Moneyball", but I guess he wasn't feeling it. So she said that she heard the movie "50/50" was funny. He decided on "50/50" and off they went.

So they talk a few days later/go out and he's back to his happy self. They start to talk about the last date and he says to her, "I'm sorry if I was not myself. My best friend just died from cancer. In fact, he died the day before we went out. I didn't realize how serious it was and I was upset that I didn't do more for my friend while he was sick".

What do you say to that? You went on a date with the guy who just lost a friend to a cancer to a buddy movie about cancer. Not that it was her fault, but the coincidence is laughable and awkward. Poor Miss Indy. And these are the crazy trials of dating.

Sleeping Beauty Awakens...

2011-10-18T20:25:00.003-04:00

Sometimes the days fly by and the weeks go on and before you know it the month is coming to the close when you swear it was just beginning. It's like you are Sleeping Beauty and you have just awaken from a deep sleep.

I am Sleeping Beauty. A number of personal and professional obligations (some expected and others very unexpected) have come up through the last few weeks and it has kept me from my blog and my dating adventure.

But I am happy to announce that I am back. I'm going to work hard and get this back on track. I was inspired and scared when I went to dinner last night with a friend and observed a first date going on next to us. I really wanted to interview them. It wasn't going very well. They were both older. They split the check...Oh!! The trials and tribulations begin again.

Recovering...

2011-09-28T21:07:00.003-04:00

I'm recovering from my duties as a bridesmaid. It didn't really seem that tiring when I was doing it this past weekend, but switching gears back into the real world has thrown me for a loop.

Thank you everyone for your comments on my tipsy rant on my ballbusting problem. I'm glad you all liked it. I read a few of your emails with one eye open. I'm not exactly ready to face the music.

Maybe I should write a few more posts with a few glasses of wine in me. On a funny note, the guy I was ballbusting on that night was actually smacked in the balls the following night! And not by me! I just happened to witness it (pure luck or need for another vodka and soda). And not by a girl - but by a drunk guy friend of ours. It looked like it killed...I felt really bad for him. See my ball busting not so bad.

I have a bunch of ideas brewing around. Not alot of exciting date prospects but based on discussions, a few of us are in that boat. What's up with that?? And basically I've come to the conclusion that Mr. Right is going to find you when and where he is going to find you. But then what do I do? Do I search for him in every encounter (until I look like a crazy detective)? Or do I just play the passive card (and do nothing and hope I'm just hit that bolt of recognition)?

I wish someone would answer the last question.

Mawwriage is what brings us together today

2011-09-24T08:12:00.003-04:00

This is going to be a quickie because I only have 15 minutes before I have to start loading up my car, change back into my PJs, and head over to the bride's parents house to meet up with everyone for hair and makeup.

I want to wish a huge best wishes to two of my readers who are marrying each other this afternoon. (I'll be bridesmaid #3 - look for me!) Jenn and Greg met several years ago and I knew from the beginning that at least this guy was going to be good for Jenn. Hey - I can't see the future - I didn't know they were going to get married back then.

He was treating her the way a girlfriend should be treated. I didn't know then, but I know now that they are right for each other. They complement each other. Jenn - If you think back to just before you met Greg, I don't think you ever thought that this would be happening, but Greg came into your life and everything changed.

So I just wanted to give a good luck, best wishes, I love you to the happy couple.

On a sidenote, I am going to the wedding solo. I'll post about it later...it's an art.

I'm Tipsy and Mistakes were made

2011-09-23T21:57:00.003-04:00

If this post doesn't make sense, you can blame Nicholas Cage, the Pioneer Woman, coozies, Bud Light, red wine, Super Target, and everything else that is running through my mind and distracting me this evening.

Let me set the scene. It's 10:00 PM at night. I'm laying in a hotel room in middle of nowhere important Virginia. (it's a Hampton Inn - I love them - free WiFi, hot breakfast - what more could a girl want). Tomorrow I'm a bridesmaid in my friend's (and loyal readers') wedding. I just bought bottles of sparkling wine and juice for tomorrow morning. I think the girls that told me to do were tipsy.

So I've come to the realization that sometimes when I drink I get a slight case of oral diarrhea. And I can't spell the word diarrhea. Anyway, I say things I shouldn't sometimes...they just come tumbling out. It gets other people in trouble. I do it to one up the guy. I do it because I'm a ballbuster (sometimes). There I admitted it....sometimes, I am a ballbuster.

And you know what. It's not good. Guys don't like ballbusters. It's uncool. I suddenly turn into the uncool girl. I can control it when I'm sober, but tipsy forget it. I don't know what came over me. I'm just going to keep my mouth shut tomorrow. That's what I'm going to do. I want to be the cool fun girl, not the ballbuster.

Thanks guys. I'm going to bed now before I house the homemade chocolate chip cookies that are sitting on the desk across from me. Another side effect of a few too many adult beverages.

Thanks for listening. I have no great solutions...but the problem has reared its ugly head again.

Help Needed

2011-09-22T13:30:00.003-04:00

I promise this won't be the only post this week, but I need some feedback from you. I need to know what some of your favorite blog posts are so far.

These blog posts are like my children. I put them out there in the world and I'm not really sure which ones will float and which ones will sink. But I'm curious to know which ones you like.

So leave me a comment and let me know which ones you like! Everyone that lets me know will become my favorite readers.

Life is a Marathon not a Sprint right?

2011-09-19T20:29:00.003-04:00

That's what they say, right? Life is a marathon, not a sprint. Why does it feel sometimes that we are all rushing towards the finish line? Me included.

Lately, I've been feeling the pressure that I am not going to reach my goal of a husband and a family. There is nothing that really triggered this or is causing this. Well that's a lie - but it's a combination of things. It's all in my head. All me, baby!

Anyway, that's for me to deal with and you to just know about.

One exciting thing that is going on for me and making me busier than ever is running. I've completed 1 half marathon on September 11th. I was 1 minute off my goal time, but I'm still very pleased. I would have never guessed that I could have run that fast for that long. I have 2 more half marathons to run before Christmas. So I hope to lose that 1 minute.

Also, I spent last weekend in class, taking a training course on coaching long-distance running. Soon, I'll have my certification in that as well. Running and exercise is a real passion of mine, and I have to admit that I do contribute on other blogs on running/fitness/weight loss in my real name... Unfortunately right now, I won't be able to reveal these posts to you...

I Don't Know What to Say

2011-09-14T16:56:00.003-04:00

I feel like every other post on this blog these days is a "please forgive me for being a bad blogger". My days are just super full (they actually expect me to get work done at work!) I have been on Match.com since I last posted!! Yeah!! I can't say I'm super excited about any of the guys that are messaging me, but we'll see.

There are definitely not any guys coming to my house trying to date me. I did try to flirt with the three repairmen that came on Friday. One was married (I don't know about the other two) and asked me if my boyfriend or husband could reattach the cover to my furnace. It was very sexist. And what did I do?

I made up a boyfriend. he was a office working piece of s who can't fix anything. This way the repair guy would just tell me how I could do it (which I did - all by myself). But it's probably the truth. My Dad can't fix anything. And I knew my Mom would yell at me if I admitted to the repair guy I lived alone. She wanted my Dad to come over while he was there. I swear she watches way too much "Dateline" or "Primetime" or whatever show Chris Hansen is catching predators on. I had more freedom as a teenager than I do now in my 30's.

Anyway, I guess I just needed a good rant about my annoying need for a fake boyfriend. I'm super busy right now, but wedding season is kicking up into full gear in the very near future. I promise I will post 5 times a week for the rest of the month.

Also, if anyone knows a good dream interpreter, let me know. I had the weirdest dream the other night - like woke me up it was so disturbing. It was disturbing because I was stuck with no way out (of a bodega in the projects with a old Asian lady and my friend Amy). Scary, no? Also included very realistic gang violence (according to the movies - I don't spend a ton of time in the projects - thanks to my Mom, Chris Hansen's biggest fan).

Isn't Ironic? According to Alanis, it is.

2011-09-07T22:18:00.004-04:00

Just like song, it's not really ironic. More of a coincidence.

Last night I checked on my Match.com accounts. Of course only one had emailed me back. Awesome! But you have to start somewhere. (Match.com tip from their social media guy: The more active you are on the site, the more you come up in different guys' searches. I knew it!)

Anyway, I just brushed it off and looked at my new matches. Some were nice and I sent them witty a couple liners to check me out. Some looked too pretty. I got scared and marked them as maybes.

And then I came to my Super Duper Match (really called the Singled Out Match of the Day), guess who it was. Yes, it was someone I had already dated. It was G, who I went on one date with back in May. A date I almost left because it became so ridiculous. Poor G. He's still out there looking for the one. And he still has hair in his profile picture and none in real life.

I did reject G this time. I knew it was going nowhere so why start up that conversation again.

Still haven't figured out my eHarmony password, but I'm trying to work speed dating into the schedule. Give it a whirl, tell you how it goes.

The Dating Game - Summary Version

2011-09-05T21:29:00.000-04:00

I was going to do another installment of "The Dating Game" as I actually got on Match.com today and sent out a bunch of winks and messages (and all that other stuff). The prospects were good. Maybe babies are back from the summer finally. Maybe now that I've been in touch with the social media guy at Match.com he's throwing some good ones my way.

So you say...what happened? Why no descriptions of these hotty fatotties? Well my friends, my water heater decided to drain itself slowly at some point over the long weekend - all over the closet and the hallway. Yeah! And I discovered it this morning after I did my work on Match.com but before I could write a post. Has this ever happened to you? Non? Count yourself lucky. The carpet is so moist (sopping) and now has weird stains on it. And now I don't have hot water for 4-5 days.

Anyway, this post is being derailed. So I sent messages to about 6 guys. Also, I got some pictures taken today by a photographer. It's time to update the Match.com profile photos. And I'm excited. And I can't remember my eHarmony password.

So you are getting a quick summary of "The Dating Game". I'm just going to give you a quick description - 1 sentence.

Bachelor #1 - He winked at me a few days ago. Not usually my type but he has alot of pictures of him playing rugby or football. Looks good. He's emailed me today.

I sent a message or wink to all of these guys...

Bachelor #2 - He's an Eagles fan. I know. What am I thinking, but I sent him a cute message anyway. He was the top match per Match.com.

Bachelor #3 - Midwestern guy - lived all over the world. Now is in DC. You know me, I like wholesome.

Bachelor #4 - Scruffy facial hair guy. He's got a cute face. That's all I remember. And he had a funny comment about puncutation.

Bachelor #5 - Volunteer Football coach, good looking Hispanic guy, already rejected me :(

Bachelor #6 - Don't even remember anything about him, now that I see his picture. But he must have had a good profile because I winked at him.

Bachelor #7 - His picture made him look like he worked in a hotel, but he has a kind face.

Bachelor #8 - His first picture looked douchey, but he also had a picture of him at Sonic. And that was enough to get a message from me.

Wow! Eight guys. That's not bad. I must have been inspired by "Most Eligible Dallas" since it was on. I'll just have to keep watching it while internet dating. It makes me very chatty!

Blogger's Regret...

2011-08-30T16:00:00.003-04:00

I'm imaging that last night's post has stirred alot of questions in my reader's mind. There has been a question or two emailed to me. In fact a few of you have said to be before, you should date Jonathan.

(Side note: I'm totally regretting using his real name as of this morning. Getting that total walk of shame feeling, especially based on what I am about to write. So I'm going back and changing his name. I think I'll call him...Don Juan. Remember that people!)

There are several reasons why I should not date Don Juan. The biggest and main reason is that we are not at the same stage in our lives. He wants to go out every other night to the clubs and meet as many girls in as many cities as possible. And I do not. He thinks that in a few years when a few years past 30 (the age in which he considers his life to be over and in need of a walker and Depends. I'm serious - he's told me this for years) he'll be ready to settle down with a hot modelesque wife and have a few kids.

If I still haven't convinced you, let me share with you his weekend plans. I feel that they will seal the deal. This weekend, he is going to NYC to meet up with an actress (who he previously met at a club in LA) who does not have any nudity clauses in her film contracts. She has a prolific film career in a certain genre of films where story lines are not very important and aliases are used by most actors and actresses. Do you catch my drift? He's going to accompany her as her assistant to an industry event and party it up. He hopes to be come very acquainted with some of her friends.

And this is prime example of why I say we will not be dating. He's like my little brother and truly I enjoy it that way.

Those three little words...

2011-08-29T21:30:00.006-04:00

Those three little words. For me, it was really hard to say them for awhile, but it's gotten much easier. They always make you stop in your tracks when you hear them. There's magic in those three little words.

I already told you how I told my personal trainer, Don Juan, that I loved him one very sleepy morning. It just popped out. I've been holding on to a secret for several weeks. He actually told me that he loved me several weeks ago, but it's not what you think. Let me set the scene.

I have access to good seats to the local major league baseball team. Jonathan played baseball in his youth and at the collegiate level. I try to get him tickets at least once every season. He asked me to get him seats to a specific game. I was able to get him those tickets for him. So I texted him and told him to meet me in the lobby of his building (it's next to mine) to give him the tickets.

It's so weird sometimes to see someone in a different context than you normally see them. We hugged and started talking, but there was something awkward in our conversation. I couldn't figure out what it was. Maybe it was the hug. We don't normally hug, but I've hugged him before. Anyway, we just nervously chatting and all the sudden, he said, "I love you." My brain just stopped for a second. Did I just hear what I think I heard? There was a pause all around. I think we were both shocked by the admission. But then he just kept going. The subject might have even changed. It felt more comfortable. The tension was gone. The moment was over. But it was a flat-out "I love you", not a "I love you for doing this".

Let me tell you. No matter who says it or when they say it, there is always a little magic in those three little words.

Slow Turnover

2011-08-25T10:34:00.004-04:00

Don't you hate it when you go to start a blog post and you get called into a meeting.

Really, I don't usually blog at work (other than to read and approve comments), but I'm feeling so guilty about the slowness of my posts. I'm finally back from 3 weeks of non-stop travelling and spotty internet coverage, but I'm having the hardest time finding time to put my ideas on paper into ideas on the internet. I guess I was used to being on the road.

I wanted to bring to everyone's attention an awesome class/self-study opportunity that is starting soon. Registration just opened today. As I said in my life list post, I had the good luck of signing up for an all day workshop given by the blogger Karen Walrond (@Chookooloonks) about life transitions (starting one, exercises for thinking about your direction, and documenting it). Karen has turned our one day workshop into a 5 week online/self study course. As someone who has been transitioning in her life and still is, I found the workshop so helpful.

Here is the link:

Chookooloonks Pathfinder Course

If you have any questions, let me know.

Something different - a new list

2011-08-22T22:09:00.002-04:00

I added a new page to the blog. It's my life list. It's a list of things I'd like to do in my life. But I'm not going to feel bad about not accomplishing everything on the list. It's not a bucket list. It's a list of things I want to do in order to live life. A list to take the bull by the horns every once in awhile instead of just living life as it comes all the time.

I want to try and get to around 100 items on the list. So I'll let you know as I add to the list or accomplish a task.

I suggest you trying to do the list as well. It's really actually exciting to figure out what cool things you've already done as well as figure out what you'd like to accomplish.