Hyperactive Laziness

The new year

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Fri, 13 Jan 2017 19:21:00 +0000

The new year has already started out different then the last 5 years because I have no New Year resolutions, no goals really not even to lose weight or work out. Nothing. Me the Queen of good intentions and making things happen is empty.

I had one major goal last year and that was to get a job and I put quite a bit of effort in to that endeavor. I had several criteria that I wanted in the new job and I had to throw them all over board to even get a job. I started out as a secretary from 8.00-5:00, crappy pay and for the first 3 weeks I would come home and fall asleep by 7:o0 each evening because learning new things and having a different routine really kicked my butt.

After 4 months I got another offer and decided to take it, these hours were from 6:30-2:30pm and so the hours were better and so was the pay but unfortunately after 5 weeks the idea started to unravel and I was told to look for something else because the store would be closing soon.
So again I had to change my outlook and my expectations.
I found something else immediately and started exactly two months after I had started my 2nd job.
So now I have my third job in 6 months and I am tired. I am tired of meeting new coworkers and making a good impression, learning the way things are done "here" and having to reorganize my day.
I sat down at the end of the year to do my yearly recap and I just didn't have it in me to put that much effort into it, of course it doesn't help that I have been sick since the beginning of the year with a cold, flu mash up that is not going away at all.
So now I guess my goal for the next few months is to find a way to bring everything together and make it work so I don't feel like I am forgetting something or slacking in other areas of my life.

I have always believed that it is possible to have it all just not at the same time and right now I need to prioritize what is important.

Watching my shows? Not important

Sleep? Important

clean my house? Pay someone to do it

Cook every night? Not gonna happen anymore but at least 3 times a week

Blog? Maybe once a week

Grocery store? Once a week

Lose my mind? Probably several times a week.

We will see how I do with these short term goals.

Talk to you later

Julia

It takes a village

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Fri, 09 Dec 2016 15:50:00 +0000

Everyone goes through tough times , we have all been there, whether it is money problems or health issues eventually Life just slaps you in the face and leaves you stunned, It can't all be sunshine and rainbows all the time.
There are however the REAL crises that we sometimes confronted with and that is when your child is hurt or sick.

One of my closest friends was dealt the mother of all blows by her little girl having a life threatening issue that was really touch and go for awhile but is now slowly getting better.
After the initial phase of utter shock came the overwhelming fear that there was nothing they could do but wait and when I think of her face when she came to that realization it still leaves me breathless.

The reaction from their friends was amazing and has continued to be astounding how many people love this family and want to help. There have been presents, cards, hugs and phone calls, people doing laundry for them and cleaning and cooking, taking care and hanging out with the other kids and just sending healing thoughts.

It was difficult at first for them to accept help because the natural instinct is to say "I'm fine" but once you realize that people that love you want to make your life a little easier then you let it go and let them help and that not only makes you feel better but it gives your friends the feeling that are doing something because there is nothing worse than being helpless. I was talking to her a couple of days ago and she told me that as a family they feel so loved and supported and just lucky to have such good people around them.

We will continue to help and we will be there to hug and help and sometimes just laugh our asses off because when you are as down as they have been the only way is up.

This is not a drill

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Sun, 09 Oct 2016 16:19:00 +0000

I have been thinking a great deal about posting again but I was overthinking it. I quit that shit.
So here goes nothing.

I got a job about 3 months ago and started getting dressed in the morning and putting some makeup on ... like a grownup.
It made me feel better, and for a couple of weeks I was going to bed at 9pm. I was overwhelmed with all the new stuff that was coming at me from all sides. Learning a new schedule and new crap everyday wore my ass out.
After 2 1/2 months I had a rhythm, and I realized that I didn't like my job. So, I started to look for a new one with different hours, a new job that lets me pick up my kid from school and actually be there for her. As I stated before it is way easier to find a job when you already have a job.

The oldest child turned 18 — here in Germany that is the equivalent of turning 21 in the states. You can drink alcohol and act a fool and you will get in trouble yourself.
I am not going to lie: It hasn't been easy letting go because, on top of being a total control freak, I am also a total control freak ... wait I said that already. Never mind ... I suck at letting go.

I like having money from a job; sometimes it makes me do weird stuff that makes my husband question my sanity but that's okay. And, no Christopher, I will not send back the rowing machine. When I save us from the zombies by crossing the Rhein in a paddle boat going 90 miles an hour, you will be grateful.

Is it just me or does fall weather make you want to bake? I want to bake cookies, cupcakes and pies and then eat them because now I have a rowing machine.
It is still in the box but as soon as I get it up the stairs, put it together and buy myself a cute rowing outfit, I will rock that medieval torture device.

Last night I went to a wedding, and I wore a pretty dress, and I looked nice....for about 2 hours and then it went to hell.

I got a fat stomach from eating pasta, which in turn made my pantyhose roll down under my stomach; that, of course, accentuated that wonderful feature. When I tried adjusting my pantyhose, I dislodged the blister bandaid I had taped to my food, that then proceeded to travel up my leg inside my pantyhose ... that at that point were trying to strangle my body.
I could never be a celebrity; they have to look immaculate all the time, I couldn't even handle pantyhose.

That's all I got.
I will talk to you later,

Julia

This is what is up.

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Fri, 27 May 2016 14:11:00 +0000

I had a goal this year to blog more because last year I was slowly just running out of things to say that were small talky enough that I could say them to the public.
And then the well ran dry.
I had quite a few readers but never got much feedback except from my friend Anny (Shout out to Anny, she is the best) about what people wanted to talk about. I am not a mind reader, people.
I have quite a few things going on but most are just too personal to write about them here, so I write about them in private and let the words sit there where they can't fester in me anymore.
So when I travel I will post pictures and that is about it for a while until I get inspired again.

I am contemplating a podcast but that will be in german for woman over 40. I decided to do it when I woke up one morning and realized that I was smack dab in the middle of a midlife crisis and had pretty much nowhere to go with my feelings of wanting to murder everyone and then eating my feelings.
I talked to my sister who turned 50 this year and my mother that turns 70 this year and they both remembered what it was like to feel like this and just how bad it fucking sucked.
When women go through something like this it is totally different then when men go through it because not only do we have the hormones to deal with all this shit but we also have to think of the kids. We can't just up and leave and get a trophy wife and get a tattoo, we have to take care of shit. I'm not saying that all men up and leave their wife or that some women don't leave their families but in most cases that is what happens.
And there I go again getting off topic.
I want to talk about how marriage is after years of being together.
What is sex like after 20 years?
Do you take care of your body? What does your body look like?
What is a no go as far as clothes you wear?
Do you have kids that are moving out or that need to move out?

I won't be talking alone because that would get boring but I still need to work on the outline and my guest list a little more before I let it loose on the public.
So that is where I am at.

I will see you soon

Julia

Dubai is fun

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Wed, 23 Mar 2016 10:11:00 +0000

We arrived Wednesday night in Dubai to an airport with a waterfall in it. We flew with Emirates which was wonderful and very relaxing and considering this was Mia's first flight and we didn't know how she would do it was great. Mia is a great traveler or we wouldn't travel as much as we do. The first night we just fell in to bed and because I can't sleep in a new place like a little kid I tossed and turned most of the night. The next day we didn't do much besides unpack and go to the pool. We decided later that evening to go to the grocery store and that was enlightening and very very confusing all at the same time. Food is very expensive here because everything is imported here so you have food from all over the world. Afterwards it took us about an hour to get back home because we couldn't get a Taxi

Today is Sunday which at home would mean that all the stores are closed and you don't do much of anything except in Dubai it is a regular workday, the week here is Sun-Thurs and Friday and Saturday off.

We decided that we would go to the Mall today which if you have ever heard of this particular mall then you would know that it is the second largest mall in the world with 1200 stores and a crap ton of places to eat. It also has a skating rink, Aquarium and every designer that you can imagine. I was there for about 4 hours today and I bought the kids a pair of flip flops and two pair of shorts for Enya. I couldn't believe how big this place was and how beautiful and clean so that in the end I wasn't able to shop at all because I was overwhelmed.

Several things I have noticed are:

There are very tiny people here I am talking skinny and just itty bitty, totally different from home and for sure different than me. People don't care if you are standing at the crosswalk, they will run your ass over if you dare to walk over it like you own it. I'm scared for my life to be honest. I really like it when they call to prayer but that is because I am tourist I think, I have yet to see anybody really stop what they are doing and actually leave to pray. I can't keep my diet here because I am on vacation and I have no self control. Everything is so well kept here and clean that I am afraid to chew gum on the street and it even says on the Metro that you are not allowed to chew gum.

I didn't know what to expect but so far it's been one good experience after another.

The same weekend we got passes to have brunch and hang out at the beach which we did.

The Brunch was awesome including the Dessert extravaganza and the weird magician they had going on for the kids.

His pidgeon decided to fly away through the restaraunt during his performance and his assistant had to chase it, it was hilarious but then again with a cocktail package included in the brunch everything was hilarious.

I just figured out how to blog from here so I am a couple of days behind, just ignore it, I am.

Talk to to you later

Julia

Light festival Mannheim Luisenpark

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Sun, 28 Feb 2016 10:57:00 +0000

They had two of these Instruments that they projected and they both played music, the other one was a saxophone that was about 3 meters high.

For the last couple of years my favorite park in the World has been having a light festival in the winter and it is gorgeous. They don't put lights up in the whole park but what they have is magical and packed. When we got there the line was about a mile long but we only stood in line for about 10 minutes so it wasn't too bad. The cost to get in is 6 euros for Adults and Mia was free.

It was definitely worth it and I will for sure go again next year.

Talk to you later,

Julia

PS: If you follow me on Instagram you have probably already seen these but if not you can @juliabiereth

Regret

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Thu, 25 Feb 2016 15:45:00 +0000

Do you know how life is supposed to be?
When you are growing up you are supposed to feel misunderstood by your parents and make them responsible for everything, including their "ruining" your life.
As you get older you realize that it's your job to make sure your life is in order and that you alone are responsible for the dumb shit that you do. You also start to see your parents as real people, which is weird at first.
Then you start having kids and you see what your parents went through having very little sleep and lots of responsibility.
When your kids hit puberty you start to realize that your mom and dad did the best they could with what they had, and you even start to feel ashamed at some of the things that you might have said to them or even did in the past.
Now you hit your 40s; this is the age when you finally accept responsibility for the mistakes you have made and you try to make it up to your parents by saying you are sorry — maybe even telling them where you messed up or that you even, God forbid, made the same mistake as they did years ago.
But what happens when you don't get that chance?
What happens to you when you start to have your epiphanies and your Mom or Dad are no longer there so you can make it up to them?
The feelings don't disappear just because your parents are no longer here; now you have all these feelings and you have nowhere to go with them so you start to feel guilty. To try and make yourself feel better, you try to reason with yourself. You tell yourself that they knew that you loved them and that if you would have had the chance, you would have told them or made it up to them. I'm not going to tell you to run out and tell your parents that you are sorry, because parents can do a real number on you growing up (and some people have parents that are manipulative up until they die). Don't make excuses for shitty parents; that is their cross to bear, not yours.
I am just saying that regret is a nasty feeling, especially when someone dies and takes away your chance of experiencing the natural progression of things. Let's face it: You shouldn't die until you are old and crusty and ready to go.
I have stopped reasoning and I have started to accept that sometimes you don't have time to say you are sorry and you have to find a way to be okay with that.
Maybe the next time you see your mom and dad, just hug them a little bit longer, but not with a pillow over their face because that, my friend, is murder.

Random

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Sun, 21 Feb 2016 12:15:00 +0000

I have been 40 for 5 months and 17 days and I still am not used to it. I don't know if it is because I am still not working and just bored out of my fucking mind or what.
I developed an allergy to my hair dye which means I had to go brunette and all of a sudden I got an allergic reaction to my eye makeup remover that gave me crusty eyelids but of course I had to go through all kinds of practice runs until I figured out what was causing this. So I have been going to bed looking like the joker with inch thick cream on my eyes.

Yesterday I went to a job convention to network and maybe find a good Business that would hire me and it was more than depressing.
I am going against a bunch of teenagers and the guy that was wearing a t-shirt there that said " Go fuck yourself" probably had better chances than I. I did find one woman that sat down with me and looked at my resume and gave me some tips on how to improve it and maybe which businesses would be interested in hiring someone older. I am amazed at how hard it is to find a damn job, I guess I am not as irresistible as I thought.

The weather here has been pretty nasty so I don't want to leave the house and be cold and wet so I just stay in and snack. I put my fitbit on yesterday for the first time in months and after walking 4ooo steps my legs hurt which means I am out of shape. I will get back to 10 000 steps a day in no time.

I have been cooking low carb for about two months and even though we sometimes splurge and eat whatever we want, it has gotten better as far as our main meals go and not eating junk food.

We went to Italy for 5 days and even though it rained pretty much everyday it was still nice to see family.

Mia had her 4th Birthday that she celebrated by getting a fever the night before.
I was standing in the Kitchen decorating cake pops ( about 50 of them) when we realized that there was no way she was going to kindergarten the next day so we kept her home and the cake pops didn't go to the kids. I ate them.

I made the worlds ugliest birthday cake with a candle on it that scared the shit out of Mia, but it was checkerboard so the inside was cool and it was tasty, so two out of three isn't bad.

Mia started swimming lessons that she really likes and I think it will be good for her to learn it so young so I don't have a heart attack every time we go to the pool.

That is about all that is going on around here so nothing exciting.

Talk to you later,

Julia

Podcasts

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Thu, 04 Feb 2016 21:32:00 +0000

I love audio books but what I don't love is the price of audio books so I found the next best thing: Podcasts.
I really enjoy podcasts because they are uncensored for one and I love me a good cussword thrown in here and there and I think that people that agree to be on a podcast are cool people.

I think I have mentioned Girl on Guy here before which is one of my favorite ones because while it is funny it's also intelligent and Alicia Tyler is such an awesome woman I could listen to her for days, especially the Self inflicted wounds segment that she does.

If you just want to laugh your ass off without really overthinking anything then check out Anna Faris is unqualified this show is really new so there aren't really that many episodes but what they do have is hysterical.

Another is the Nerdist: this podcast has almost 800 episodes so you have plenty to listen to and it is free. I really love Chris Hardwick's laugh because you can tell he is enjoying himself.

Grownups read things they wrote as kids is a great one because it is so intimate at times and then hysterical the next minute. It comes from a live show in Canada so you get the audience reaction to each persons story and I like that.

So check these out because I obviously have amazing taste.
Take care
Julia

Is it the Internet's Fault?

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Wed, 27 Jan 2016 18:16:00 +0000

If you know me then you know that I am a social media junkie.
I am everywhere: Tumblr, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Persicope, Bloglovin; you name it, I am on it.

I follow all kinds of blogs about fashion, style, family, cooking or refashion, basically anything that interests me. Sometimes, when someone has written something that is so "out there," I even get on GOMI and see what the people on there wrote. GOMI stands for "Get off my Internets" and it is a site you can go to if you want to read about people completely annihilating someone's blog. I don't go there often because, after a while, it leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

Now, I am an adult and I do realize that what you see on the internet is nowhere near reality. If someone posts beautiful pictures of their house you can bet your ass that somewhere out of range of the camera there are dirty clothes thrown on the floor or a kid in a shitty diaper. That is the real world and I know that.

Another way they get you is to post beautiful pictures of themselves wearing cute outfits that you know they are not hoofing it to the playground in. Heels? Really? Have you ever chased down a toddler in frickin' heels?

I wear boots with a heel sometimes but only if I am not out with my kid, because being able to chase after her is way more important than looking cute. Besides which, I can manage to fall flat on my face on an even surface.

Every night before I crawl into bed, I take my clothes off and I look at myself in the mirror and I tell myself I am fat and lazy. If I overheard my daughter talking to herself that way, I would be so upset. I would hug her and tell her she is beautiful and that she is perfect the way she is. Still, every night I do that to myself and I don't know why.

I am afraid that someday my body will get revenge and make me sick because on a daily basis I am mean to it and tell it it's not good enough. I am healthy and strong enough to carry my kid around when she needs it. I am healthy enough that when one of the kids get sick, I don't get it too. I have never worn eye cream and still the wrinkles around my eyes are from laughing and I am okay with that. I have had three kids and gained a ton of weight but I still wear a size 5 because I bounced back.

I have a double chin, not because I am fat but because my mother has one and my great grandmother also—it's hereditary along with my kid-sized hands. I read other younger women's blogs and they are getting botox and spray tanning and extensions and fake nails, and I don't need any of that and I still think I am not good enough.
Has the internet ruined my perception of what is normal?
How do you fix that kind of problem?
How do you treat your body with the respect it deserves?
Would it be enough to be grateful and tell myself everyday that I am awesome or should I just stop looking at myself naked?

Resolutions 2016!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Fri, 01 Jan 2016 08:09:00 +0000

Happy New Year!!!!! I spent mine on the couch binge watching scandal

So I went through my resolutions for last year and checked to see what I accomplished out of those:
1) Get a JOB!!!! My stay at home time will be officially over in February and I will be getting a fun job to get me out of the house. My goal is to have it by Feb. 1 but we will see. If I am going to make that goal I might have to take something I am not super excited about till something great comes along, but that is okay -- I can live with that.
That did not happen this year due to several things like only half days a the kindergarden till October where I got a full spot and the fact that it's tough on the market but things are looking up now so I am hopeful.

2) Get a tattoo. My mother is going to kill me but I am going to get one to reward myself this year -- something small and easily hidden -- but I can still show it off I want. I am still on the fence about what the tattoo will be, but knowing me, I will decide right before I get it.
I didn't do this because I just now figured out what I want so that might happen this year.

3) Learn Yoga. I have been wanting to do this for so long but never got my ass in gear. I did try it at home and it was hard but I felt good. I feel so stiff lately and when I get up, I walk like Quasimoto, so I know I need to do something soonish.
Yoga didn't happen and I am still looking for a place that offers it when I can go.

4) Travel to 2 countries and I have those planned already: Italy (plane tickets bought) and New York and if all goes well Prag for a weekend. New York for my 40th Birthday is going to be the most epic and my siblings and I are already excited about it. We're planning all kinds of fun stuff.
Italy, New York happened

5) Do something fun at least once a month like Holifestival, Concerts, Fleamarkets, etc. I have several things already planned so I have a head start on that.
I did that

6) Take vitamins regularly, especially for my hair. Not only is it gray, but it is really thin so I need to do something about that. I usually start vitamins and stop because I forget.
Did this but not regularly

7) Do another whole 30 to reset my body and get rid of all the junk I put in it, at least for a little while so I can start eating nasty again.
I did this and now I start again tomorrow

8) Learn two new skills. I am not sure what yet, but it will come to me.
I did this and the biggest one was the play where I learned something new everyday

9) Be more aware of what is going on in the moment. That is a tough one for me because I am always so busy in my brain that I am happy when I don't forget who I am.
I 100% did this and even though I still drag my camera all over the place I definitely paid more attention

10) Go to every event my kids have, even if I don't want to since I know it will be really boring. I already started this year; that's why I am in the parent council in my son's class. He hates that. lol mission accomplished.
I did this all the way.

I think I did pretty good at least I am satisfied with my progress
This year:

1) Learn sign language, I am starting that this month

2) Exercise almost everyday I have my plan all worked out and my exercise partner ( Enya) ready. This is happening fo sure because I need it really bad.

3) Learn how to pick a lock, don't ask me why I want to learn this I just think it could be helpful.

4) Ge the qualifications that I need for the Job that I want. I have come to the realization that you can't stop going to school if you want to be interesting to the job market so I will be adding to my skills this year.

5) Travel to 2 countries

6) Write more I really dropped the ball on the Blog this year. I started writing on August 18th 2010 and have been pretty consistent so far but I would like to do more.

7) Minimize my Belongings I started this already but I need to really crack down and go through everything and get rid if it.

8) Continue to be aware and considerate

That is about it I think they are doable so here goes nothing.

Talk to you later,
Julia

Year Review 2015

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Thu, 31 Dec 2015 07:41:00 +0000

I have seen quite a few people writing things like "I hope 2016 is better than 2015"! Well I don't feel that way I think that 2015 was a pretty good year with ups and downs and good things along with the bad. One of the biggest highlights this year was my trip to New York for my 40th Birthday, I had so much fun and saw so much I can't even put it into words.

Unfortunately it can't all be good... the car accident that Christopher and Mia were in was terrible but luckily we have a shit-ton of guardian angels that protected them from the worse.

goodbye Mothership we really miss you

Family pictures that we took this Fall were great

Our trip to Bavaria this year was short but fun it is there that I realized that I am in horrible shape because I couldn't make it all the way to the top of the mountain without and oxygen tank

Joshua graduated this year and his uncle John was even there he started his job in August and he is doing really well with the work part of things but he still dislikes school. No biggie though

Family came.....it is always fun when my sister comes to visit. She is nuts

We went to Brussels this year which was fun and cold and dirty and expensive....

But Ashley and Kyle were great so that made it worth it

We took a girls trip this year with Mom to France for a couple of days

Rehearsals for the play started in March and kept me busy until the premiere in June.

My annual girls trip went to Italy this year and it was a blast I will definitely go back again because I didn't see everything and I would especially like to see the opera in Verona again.

We did 6 different Photo shoots and learned quite a bit like action shots are hard and you will probably look like an idiot

All in all still a good year.

Talk to you later,

Julia

Tips when looking for a job

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Mon, 30 Nov 2015 22:04:00 +0000

I have been actively looking for a job for about 1 month now and inactively for about 1 year, and let me tell you what I have learned about this process:

1. Personnel leasing companies should be illegal; they are absolute leaches and even in Russia they are against the Law, but here in Germany they are allowed to operate and ruin the job market. I have applied for jobs through them several times and I have come to the conclusion that they are basically lying, thieving criminals and they should go to jail.
Not only do they lie about what jobs they have but they also lie about how much you will actually get paid because the rest of the money goes in their pocket. I HATE THOSE LEACHES!!!

2. Make sure you apply to everything that looks even remotely interesting, because after you have applied to 30 jobs you might get 2 invitations to come in and discuss employment—those odds really suck ass. It's worse than the lottery; I'm just saying.

3. If you are unsure about whether or not you can do the job, then call and ask questions before sending your application or resume. I called and spoke to people from almost every job I applied to, and it was always a friendly experience. It also gave me a heads up whether or not the job was right for me.

4. Everybody wants the best and the brightest and the youngest with years of experience. But, they will take you íf you can sell yourself and promise them that your child won't be sick every 5 minutes. However, if your child does get sick, you have grandma, grandpa or the dog to watch said kid. It takes a village; just let them know you have one.

5. Set your hopes high but your standards low.
I'm kidding......~~no I'm not~~
When I first started looking for a job my goals were to only work from 8-4 or even from 7-4 but I have slowly come to understand that nobody gives a crap what I want. My dream work hours would be 7:30-4:30 but I don't see it happening.

6. Don't be afraid. There is nothing to be afraid of when you are going into a job interview (unless you are applying for a job as a partner in a law firm; then chances that the person sitting in front of you is just like you and might even be nervous are slim to none). If not, then show no fear.
Be confident but not a cocky dick ~~see what I did there?~~. Nobody likes a know-it-all.

7. Check out the company before you go to the interview. (Here's another thing about those bastards from the personnel company; they don't tell you who the company is until you have an appointment.) I found out that the company that I was applying to does fracking and while I will not chain myself to a greenpeace boat, I do have a problem with fracking. You ever see a flame shoot out of a faucet? You want to?

8. Make sure you figure out on google maps where the address is from said company and check out nearby parking. I made the mistake of not doing that for the first interview that I went on and walked for 30 minutes in heels. By the time I got there, I had blisters all over and then had to walk back. Now I put my chucks in my purse so that never happens again.

9. Ask yourself what you want to do and why you want to do it. Do you need a job to pay the bills? Will you be okay working in an office or do you like to be in the field? Does it have to fulfill your destiny and give you meaning to live or are you okay with having nice people to work with and not taking your job home at night? Of course, I would love to be creative everyday but I also want to pay my bills and be home on weekends. I have my priorities and those are my family and being able to eat so knowing that helps me when looking.

10. It's always easier to get a job when you already have one. If you want to work for a certain company but they don't yet have the job opening, apply for something else. Most companies give out their jobs as internships, so take the job, wait three months and then start applying for a job inside of the company. I started out as a stocker at 20 hours per week and 3 months later I was a full time stockroom supervisor.

So, these are my tips but feel free to let me know if you have anymore for me.

Talk to you later,
Julia

Baking Cookies is a bitch

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Mon, 30 Nov 2015 15:52:00 +0000

I have been baking cookies for a long time so you would think that I know what the hell I am doing but unfortunately that is not the case. I have been trying to perfect royal icing and I just can't of course it doesn't help when you decide to do red icing on little gingerbread cookies and it looks like someone stabbed them to death.

I do have the most amazing never fail sugar cookie recipe though that will enable you to make these ugly ass but wonderful tasty cookies yourself in the comfort of your home.

Sugar cookie FKA Murder cookies

225 gr. Butter
200gr sugar
2 eggs
I tsp vanilla extract
400gr. flour
5gr. (1 packet) Baking soda
1tsp salt

Chill for 1 hour
Bake for 5-6 minutes on 350 / 175c or check it every couple of minutes if you live somewhere up high like my sister, her stuff is done twice as fast.

The little brown dudes are made with a cinnamon cookie dough

Little dude cookies

1 cup of sugar
1/2 cup of butter
3 egg yolks
2tbsp milk
2 cups flour
2 tsp cinnamon
2 tsp allspice
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2tsp salt

Chill for an hour and bake at 350/175 for 10-12 minutes

Good luck

Julia

Dear Julia

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Sat, 28 Nov 2015 23:00:00 +0000

a letter to my younger self

Dear Julia,

Let me just start out by saying that some of the things I am going to tell you are going to suck, but you will be okay; even though the saying is stupid and I wish I didn't have to say this to you, "What doesn't kill you does make you stronger!"

Don't hate your body; it will do some amazing things.

Don't get married till you are in your late 30s because you won't know your worth before that and you will be taken advantage of.

Puberty is going to really suck and you will question your parenting and your sanity EVERY FRICKEN DAY!!!!

Don't be afraid. Whenever you have to make a decision, you should ask yourself what the worst possible outcome of the decision is, and if you can live with that, then there is no reason not to do it.

Like yourself even if you are an asshole sometimes.

Ninety percent of the time tell the truth, and always tell the truth when it is about stupid stuff; it will save you so much time.

Keep educating yourself, because you will go back to school in your 30s and it will be tough to start all over.

Keep reading. It will help you in everything you do.

Love is not a romantic comedy so stop comparing your boyfriends to the leading men in these dumb-ass movies. There is no such thing as an unattached, millionaire playboy that will give up his ways for you; also if he has that much money, he is either a criminal or it's his daddy's money.

It's okay to like older men but you are going to marry a man only 4 years your senior, so get it out of your system.

Marriage is hard work and there will be times when you don't want it anymore and that's okay. Just keep working at it and don't give up without a fight.

Stop cutting your hair so short you look like an idiot, and for all that is holy: STOP DYING YOUR HAIR RED! YOU LOOK LIKE RONALD MCDONALD'S UGLY SISTER!!!

Don't forget to say, "I love you," but only if you mean it; don't just say it for the hell of it.

Your life will be an adventure, sometimes a boring adventure but an adventure none the less.

Your siblings are your squad so treat them accordingly, even if they constantly tell you that you look like Mom.

Always forgive but never forget. Your mama didn't raise no fool.

Talk to you later,
Julia

Treasures or Trash?

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Fri, 27 Nov 2015 23:00:00 +0000

I decided, even though in the last post I said I would never post my thoughts about this book, The fault in our stars but I decided to do it anyway.

I bought this book a while ago but couldn't bring myself to read it. I thought it was going to be a book about kids with cancer; it is, in a way, but it is also so, so much more than that.
I think it depends on what age you are when you read this book and what you have been through, because it has so many different messages and so many important things that to grasp. I will have to read it again and again.

The first thing that was astonishing to me was that Augustus is so honest. He isn't shy and he doesn't beat around the bush; he likes Hazel Grace and he tells her that. I read once that one way to live dangerously was to tell the truth all day no matter what. I think that is how Augustus lives.
When I was reading this book and it came time for these kids to open up about their thoughts and tell this support group what they feared, I was expected something sad and dramatic but then came the bombshell that just floored me.

“I fear oblivion,” he said without a moment’s pause. “I fear it like the proverbial blind man who’s afraid of the dark.” Augustus Waters

This was me. I have felt like this my whole life. When I was a kid I always confused this feeling with my fear of death but now that I am older and I have been confronted with losing someone close to me, I no longer fear death. I fear dying and that no one will remember me and everything I have ever collected or what was important to me will be worthless.
What Augustus said with total honesty and sincereness was what I had been feeling for so long but could never explain. It also explained why I couldn't put into words how sad I was about my Dad being gone and my not having anything of his to remember him by.
My dad always had "little treasures"; that's what he would call all the little trinkets he would save or find with his metal detector; later, when he barely left the house, his cherished his little pens and address labels with his name on them that you get for free. He would place them all around himself on the bar in his kitchen, and every time I was there he would look at them and ask me if I thought they were neat. These little things made him happy and they were nothing compared to the beautiful things that he had owned in his lifetime. When he died and I kept up my end of the bargain of not going to his funeral as promised, I started to obsess about these "little treasures." Where did they go? Did his wife just throw them away? Did she understand how important this was? I kept thinking about how my dad had worked his whole life and this junk was so important to him, and now that he wasn't there to appreciate it, it would probably just land in the trash. Was that his legacy? His kids and a bunch of shit that wasn't worth anything?

I started collecting stories from his friends and our family so I wouldn't just be sad; I wanted to hear about how he impacted other peoples' lives and what they took away from knowing him. What was left when all we had were stories and memories?

When Hazel Grace replied to Augustus, I felt relief, but of course a feeling I have had my whole life doesn't go away with one paragraph I read in a book, but it did get me to think about things differently.

"I looked over at Augustus Waters, who looked back at me. You could almost see through his eyes they were so blue. “There will come a time,” I said, “when all of us are dead. All of us. There will come a time when there are no human beings remaining to remember that anyone ever existed or that our species ever did anything. There will be no one left to remember Aristotle or Cleopatra, let alone you. Everything that we did and built and wrote and thought and discovered will be forgotten and all of this”—I gestured encompassingly—“will have been for naught. Maybe that time is coming soon and maybe it is millions of years away, but even if we survive the collapse of our sun, we will not survive forever. There was time before organisms experienced consciousness, and there will be time after. And if the inevitability of human oblivion worries you, I encourage you to ignore it. God knows that’s what everyone else does.” Hazel Grace

I had already been thinking about minimizing my things before I read this book, but afterwards I felt suffocated so I slowly got rid of clothes and make-up and anything really that I didn't need. At first, I wanted to sell it but then I just started to give it away or donate it because I wanted it to be gone as soon as possible. I downsized my closet from two floor-to-ceiling shelves to one shelf and a few clothes on my hanging rack.

I still have a ton of stuff but I am slowly getting ahead of it and the suffocating feeling is slowly getting better, but it will still take some time.
I am trying to not hold on to things too much and I am trying to be more aware of what I buy.
Is it important? Do I need it or do I just want it to make me feel better? Is it something that can be used over and over again or am I being cheap even though I know it will end in the trash?
I don't think that I could ever become a minimalist because I do like glitter and glitter isn't really something that you need to survive, so that is a no-go, but I would be happy being able to live clutter free.

I do think that traditions are important so I am trying to remind myself that those are the things that my kids will remember when I am no longer here. Maybe they will continue them and when I come to haunt them, which I totally will, I will check and make sure they are doing it right.

PS: I know my dad's wife kept some of the treasures because she knew how important it was to him, but I don't expect her to keep everything, you eventually have to move on.

Talk to you later
Julia

Christmas movies

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Fri, 27 Nov 2015 11:51:00 +0000

I love Christmas movies, I don't know why I love them so much but I just do. Here are some of my favorites:
National Lampoon Christmas Vacation

You can't do wrong with this movie it has everything in including a great soundtrack and Chevy Chase in a fur wrap with a Turban and evening gloves.

The Holiday

Besides the fact that this movie is full of beautiful people it's also funny and sweet and the movie score has been one of my favorites for years.

White Christmas

Beautiful costumes and dancing set to the most incredible music, this is the ultimate Christmas movie

Rise of the Guardians

It's adorable and scary and wonderful

The Grinch

Jim Carrey....need I say more?

Nightmare before Christmas

Not everyone loves Tim Burton but if you do then you will love this

Fred Clause

Amazing cast and great music

The family Stone

You will ugly cry but Diane Keaton makes it worth it

The muppets Christmas

The muppets rats are the greatest thing ever......

Scrooged

Bill Murray is a dipshit but soo funny

Elf

Will Ferrell in tights gives me nightmares but Oh my god is he hilarious

So what are your favorites?

Talk to you later,
Julia

What's up

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Fri, 20 Nov 2015 12:57:00 +0000

I would tell you that I'm back but I will probably fall off the Blogging wagon again because that is how I roll now.

I am the mother that tells her teenage kid that he needs to stop eating because I am getting tired of buying ingredients for dinner and him eating them. You are not effing starving!!!!

I am the person that gets so hangry that she eats the paper towel that her sandwich was wrapped in and doesn't even notice it. by the way that was the last paper towel in the house and I ate it so theres that.

I am also the woman that has all Justin Bieber albums because she likes his music and she isn't ashamed of it. okay maybe a little but whatever

I am the girl that thought longer and harder about cutting her hair off then she did about what she wants to do for a living, In my defense my hair was down my back and now it is shoulder length.

I am the unemployed person that got so confident that I will probably never find a job because I won't take anybody's shit . Unless its a really great job then I will shut my mouth

I am the weirdo that has 3 ukuleles now and can't play any songs by heart except "Like a Virgin".
Probably need to work on that.

I am the German that has the first Christmas tree up in her neighborhood because she needs an infusion of Christmas spirit stat!! I don't have it up yet but I will tonight, maybe.....

I am the emotional schmuck that read "The Fault in our Stars" and then was so inspired that she wrote a whole paper about it that was so full of feels that it makes her uncomfortable even reading it. Nobody will ever read it ever......

I am the 40 year old that gets pimples like she is still in puberty.
Mother Nature sometimes you can be a real bitch!!

If I am completely honest it's not that I didn't have stuff going on but I wasn't feeling very nice so if I would have wrote it would have been bitchier then I would have liked and you know what they say: if you don't have anything nice to say then shut the hell up.

Talk to you later,

Julia

Goodbye New York

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Fri, 02 Oct 2015 09:34:00 +0000

I was awake at 5:30 because I am weird and of course no one else was so I decided to take a bath and wash my hair, paint my toenails and pack my suitcase, at 8:30 I went to knock on my sisters door and she was still asleep. We had decided to check out Grand central station and try to find a cronut which by the way we did not. damn Jim Gaffigan for putting that thought in my sisters head.

Grand central Station is beautiful and even though it is busy it is still efficient and just cool, I love the marble everywhere and it makes me think of something out of a Harry Potter Movie with all the different arches taking you to a neat place. Unfortunately the front was under construction so we couldn't take any pictures of it.
Have I mentioned that all of New York is under construction?

Its hard to see the design on the ceiling but the whole ceiling has a pattern

The library was really busy with Students everywhere places like that always have a really cool vibe and we would have liked to go in but we were on a mission to get to the train station.

And then it was time for the siblings to leave and we had to say goodbye.

Now I am going to tell you how it was even possible that I could go on this trip and spend 5 days in this total nutbag of a city and enjoy that daylights out of myself.
John and Sandy spoiled me rotten and indulged me for 5 days, John had me picked up and drove back to the airport, he paid for our drinks, food and musical tickets. Sandy bought our New York passes and ubers and food. I felt like a kid and I liked it. HAHAHAHAHAHA it's awesome being the baby in the family sometimes. I am so grateful that they took the time to go away with me for my Birthday and make fun of me for 5 days.

Goodbye New York I'll see you again.

New York Day 4

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Wed, 30 Sep 2015 09:05:00 +0000

We took a trip to Hoboken and yes that is really the name of that town. The subway was surprisingly clean and the trip only took like 15 minutes so I can understand people working in the city and living in Hoboken, one of the things that I did like was that it was cozy and normal kind of like it was when I lived in Ohio. It was the first time I thought " I could probably live here".

John told us about this little place that makes really great sandwiches so we took an uber and went there, Fiore's is know for its Mozzarella amongst other things but especially that.

When we got there we walked in the back and there was an adorable older gentleman making fresh mozzarella and even broke us off a piece to try. It was warm and while I am not a big mozzarella fan I still thought it was really great.

Afterwards we got sandwiches with roast beef, olive oil, mozzarella cheese and it was really good even though I couldn't eat all of it.

John knows the owner so we sat and talked awhile, the funny thing was everyone I talked to had been to Germany and really liked it so we had that in common it is a family owned business and you can tell because everyone has the same name or variations of it.

It was definitely a highlight of our trip and I can only recommend it if you are looking for a great sandwich.

Because my child is a big cakeboss fan we had to check out the shop and get some souvenirs for her, while I was there I picked up 3 cupcakes and ate them before I left the next day. Red Velvet, Oreo and carrot cake at three a dollars a cupcake I thought that wasn't too bad.

This was the view from the bar in our Hotel, I think I went to that M&M store everyday.

Later that night we went to china town and had dinner at this really tiny little Chinese place that had huge portions that none of us could eat. I also shopped a little while I was at it because they had the same stuff as Times square had at a fraction of the price.
John was afraid we would get mugged but nothing happened one of the things I noticed in New York is that there are Policemen everywhere so its really quite safe.
We saw a little fair on our way so we stopped there and checked it out. It was cute with lights hanging between the buildings and food tents where you could anything your heart desires.

I wanted to stay up really late because it was our last night but everyone was tired so we headed to bed to get an early start the next day.

(I didn't see John till 12 the next day. )

Talk to you later,
Julia

New York Day 3

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Mon, 28 Sep 2015 01:47:00 +0000

On the third day, we rented bikes and rode through Central Park and almost never stopped so I was a wreck by the time we got through the damn thing. Have I mentioned yet that my brother walks and rides his bike like his ass is on fire? I swear, I could not keep up so I rode standing up, uphill and by the time we took the bikes back I thought my head was going to explode.
We decided to walk to Central Park because taking the bus would have been 45 minutes for a distance that we walked in 15 minutes. Thats how bad traffic is. On the way there I found a store that sells bobble heads and I got my Captain America.

Can you tell I was last?
There were three lanes: joggers, bikes and cars.

The bikes were pretty nice and I rented a basket for 1 dollar to cart all my shit around.

I'm in love with this little man.

Sandy was afraid she would barf on the horse but she didn't. We had so much fun on those. We kept imagining that we were catching ebola on those poles, but so far, nothing.

After we got back, Sandy and I decided to go back to the NBC store and while we were there, some kid came up to us and asked us if we wanted to see Seth Meyers perform his opening bit, where he tests jokes on an audience and sees which ones make the cut. Of course, we went and even though we weren't allowed to take pictures it was really cool to see the stage where they tape Saturday Night Live and to walk the same halls as the SNL guests and stars. There were pictures everywhere on the wall but, like I said, no pictures.
Most of the people in the test audience were tourists from all over the world. Still everybody laughed at the dildo jokes so I guess it doesn't matter where you come from because everyone is a pervert.

That horse ate a hotdog.

NYC Cheesecake

Later that night we went to the Meat Packing district to walk along the Highline but first we had dinner where I had my first spicy Margarita. My brother decided to have several so he was having a good time.

I had a hipster coffee and some hipster tried to sing "Happy Birthday" to me.......I threatened him and he quit.
I also had homemade pie and homemade ice cream.

Nice Firefighter who let me take a picture with him. Unfortunately, my brother was holding the camera and after a couple of drinks he was distracted and also busy yelling at people.

It was a busy and really fun day.

Talk to you later,

Julia

New York Day 2

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Sun, 27 Sep 2015 16:53:00 +0000

We rode the Hop On Hop Off bus and saw a lot of the city. Then we took the ferry to Liberty Island. I was surprised at how little The Statue of Liberty is; it's not tiny, but it seems so much larger than life when you see if on TV.

Of course, I had to rock the Unicorn.

We rode an elevator with a glass roof to the 67th floor and then walked the rest of the way up to Top Of The Rock (Rockefeller Center).

Poor John had to take pictures with two different phones and hold all the bags.

Ground Zero was calm and a little somber but not sad. There were flowers in some of the names there but all in all a very peaceful place.

Dan took pictures of everything.

That would be Central Park.

Didn't quite turn out as planned....

We were some hardcore tourists with our headphones on listening to the tour guide tell us how important he actually is and oohhing and ahhing in all the right places.

The tour guide kept telling us not to stand up because the streetlights and signs would decapitate you. I wonder how they figured that out.

That night, we went to see Kinky Boots, which was amazing and a big fat highlight of our trip!

If you ever get the chance to see it then do it; it was such a wonderful experience.

Talk to you later,
Julia

New York in a Nutshell

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Sat, 26 Sep 2015 07:01:00 +0000

Day 1

I flew with Singapore Airlines and let me just say, "It was a Deelight." I have never seen so many beautiful flight attendants in my life.
I watched movies the whole time, which is what I always look forward to the most.

Insurgent
Spy
Mordecai

I arrived at 11:30am and was driven to the hotel by a dude named Mohammed who explained to me how much it costs to live in New York and how much he loves it there. He also explained to me that it was lighter traffic because it was a Jewish holiday and that some of the stores would be closed downtown. All in all, good intel.
I got in to the hotel and unpacked my stuff and took a bath and tried to take a nap, which was not happening because I kept staring out the window and looking way down 22 floors. I hate heights so I was throwing up in my mouth the whole time.

I left to go find a pharmacy and returning, I saw my sister in the lobby checking in. So, I followed her and my brother-in-law up to their room and hung out until they got unpacked, so we could go out to Time Square and check out what all the fuss was about.

Let me just say that I was overwhelmed with how loud and busy it was, and after being out for an hour, we headed back to have a drink and wait for John to arrive.

After quite a few drinks, we headed out to eat at Da'Ninos, where they serve huge portions of food that was really good.
We headed back to the hotel around 9:30 which was really late for me because, at that point, I had already been up for almost 24hours so I had to get to bed.
Of course, I couldn't sleep so I got back up at 2:30 and read until it was time to get up at 6:00.
I am the worst vacation insomniac; it's going to kill me one of these days.

Talk to you later
Julia

Things I learned

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Wed, 12 Aug 2015 22:10:00 +0000

Once again.....

1) Just because you are a little tan does not mean you can skip putting on sunscreen. After putting it on the kids, I don't feel like putting it on myself.
Don't be that dumbass. Because you will look like an asshole.

2) If you do participate in Gishwhes, be prepared not to sleep well the night after it ends. You will wake up and you will be thinking that you have an idea for an item and be frantic until you remember that it is over.

3) Don't discover an awesome cupcake baking book that you hid in your closet and then proceed to make said awesome cupcakes and then eat two. Sugar is bad for you, but it is so good that I try to not care.

4) If you put water in the kiddie pool then you should probably not walk away while the hose is turned on. It might fall out of the pool and flood the kitchen. You won't notice it until after there is about an inch of water on your floor. You'll run towards the hose and slip on the water with both feet, crash under the table on your back and just lay there for a second checking to make sure you didn't break your hip. That shit is the reason people die in household accidents.

5) On Saturday when the Christopher Street Day parade was going on, I was thinking to myself that I am so thankful and grateful that I live in a country where being gay is celebrated and not ignored or shunned. Fly your Rainbow!!!

6) This is perfectly acceptable behavior for this scorching hot weather

that makes me feel like we live at the center of the sun.

7) I was right! The unicorn mask is hilarious and makes me laugh every time someone puts it on. Best 16 euros I've spent in a while.

8) Don't leave your toddler alone where she has access to a bottle of lotion.

9) Sleeping with a fan blowing on you as high as it goes is an American thing. The Germans will think you are wack. They can't hang.

10) Seeing tiny infants still makes me go AWWWW......but my uterus says, "Oh, Hell NO"!!!

Talk to you later,

Julia

Random

noreply@blogger.com (Julia) — Wed, 12 Aug 2015 14:48:00 +0000

So if you know me then you know that I am only happy when my life is crazy, chaotic and busy and that is what it has been the last two weeks.
I was afraid that when Mia was home from Kindergarden for summer break that I would fall into my hole and not leave the couch the whole time.
But I made myself do something everyday and even though it is hotter than hell here I still managed to do stuff.
I started my whole30 with mediocre results but that is my fault I am back on the wagon again and dealing with a sugar loss headache.
Update further down about the diet. I'm an asshole by the way.
I participated in Gishwhes this year and I had a blast. This is a worldwide scavenger hunt that makes you do weird stuff and lets you meet new people while doing weird stuff and it was fun.
It was over on Sunday morning and I was not able to sleep last night because I felt like I could have done one more item and I thought about how I would do it. I guess it's called Gishcrash and everybody had it.

Have a conspiracy party with suspicious guests

Make a dress out of construction paper taken in front of a hotrod
These were just some of the things I did.

Mia is having fun being at home and she tells me everyday that she isn't going back....ever.
Oh but she is going back she just doesn't know it yet.

It's been so hot here that I don't want to go outside during the day but it's kind of tough to tell a 3 year old that so today we packed up and went to the public pool and wore her little butt out. I also used this opportunity to eat French fries, ice cream and some gummi bears so my diet is going well, thanks for asking.

I will start writing again regularly now that the stuff that I am doing isn't secret anymore like gishwhes and the play.
Talk to you later,
Julia