Dear Everything,

2012-02-20T15:32:00.000+08:00

My tenses are terrible, I realise. Well that sucks. “Well, at least you are constant.” So maybe that is considered to be a compliment. Still haven’t touch my lunch and I don’t feel that hungry anymore.

It feels like I’d rather be on my own, to do my own thing and just not bother to salvage the ruins.

2012-02-19T20:11:00.005+08:00

Spent my weekend to finish reading one novel, it is indeed very haunting and compelling.

Anyway, Sissy read up a magazine just now and she had decided to do salads for lunch everyday. I doubt she'll even last for a week with lunch like that, given to her love for McSpicy which is the second last burger I hate. I hate Fillet O Fish the most. Anyway, she remembered OUT OF THE SUDDEN of what her dietitian advised her to eat every day for lunch so she decided to heed her advice and give it a try. And that is something new.

Also, I really wished I can visit the new nature reserve. Labrador Nature Park. Mom went there alone not long ago and said it was really a panoramic view of the sea. Ah, I miss the times when I used to be grumpy, childish and unappreciative when she had to dragged me along to the zoo, botanic garden and especially MacRitchie Reservoir. I used to go there very often because my Mom wanted me to go with her. And I remembered how Sissy and I always can't wait to go somewhere with aircon or Coronation Plaza and we like to eat the Kids Meal or something at the second storey of a FastFood like of restaurant. That lady made really nice wedges, I remember:)

And Mom still brings us to Botanic or Hortpark once in a while but not that often anymore since we are all busy with our own stuff. I miss the smell of nature. Well, my mom really likes nature and I always feel that she is different from other moms:D well, besides nature my mom loves black and white houses.

12 Dec 11, She took me to walk to one of Botanic Garden Area and showed me a Black and White house from a distance. That house, as said by her was really ancient and holds a vintage charm. She even asked me to imagine if there is still people living there and doing their activities. It was really creepy to look at it and imagine it(given how I can really imagine it)

So that is my weird Mom I guess.

2012-02-16T18:15:00.005+08:00

I am going to try my best to be health conscious now which means cutting down on all my top favourites.

Attempted to boil carrots and eat as a snack. And I concluded that I fail as a good cook. The process of eating the carrots(yes, edible.) feels so torturous. Going organic is good but need to get used to eating things just as bland as it is, reducing sugar and salt etc. Well, so F&N here.

My next attempt would be a garden salad then. And just like today, no matter how I don't exactly fancy that kind of food but I will force myself to finish the food as long as it is good for my health.

"Keeping the Moon" from Sarah Dessens is fairly an average book... been long since I read those 'girlish-type' of books since I am more to thrillers and excitement books(which is books that is usually of boys'type) and gonna read as when I can before the things start to get busier, leaving me no time at all. Having said that, Thank Jesus that he helps me in my Maths test. "almost" cheat in one question but integrity, so I didn't make any changes:) and still managed a relatively acceptable grade for maths CA1.

Still a not so in-depth understanding level

2012-02-13T16:15:00.010+08:00

Wanted to practice music but decided to come online, Youtube and Blog:D

There seems to be so much distractions in my life. So much of 'other' stuffs that I want to do. However, I have to straighten out my priorities.

Well, I feel that I have no aptitude for bio at all. It seems like no matter what, I don't get it. I STILL DON'T GET IT. So I do like plant science, animal science(ecology stuff) but I have negative interest in some of the most BORING chapters, but still.. it is part of bio D:

There is still time to work hard for what I want, right? Shouldn't I be undaunted by all circumstances?:D

So last night, I SMSED my little sister "tired of trying." I truly appreciate that God use her to speak to me and her words really encourage me, really pick me up. And while I scrolled through the facebook page last night, I was reminded that In all Good and Bad times, Trust Jesus. Love my Lord! (Oh. Recently, I found out that Owl City are also Christians:))

Also during the weekends, I spent majority of my time reading this book "Blood Ties" and all I can say is, it's amazing. Though in the end, I read too much, leaving no time to study for my maths test.

2012-02-04T21:57:00.003+08:00

Breakthru' Cafe for a Dim Sum Lunch with Dad and Sis:D
really love the cafe cause it's like a JESUS-CHRIST-CENTRED environment.

That day, I dug out my handwritten journals and read through a few of them.
I wrote all of them during my sec 4 days and I realised how emotional I used to be. However, indeed I feel that writing is the best way to express myself instead of pouring it out with someone. I luv writing:) and I get really long-winded when it comes to writing.

Well this year, at times I get really pessismistic due to some reasons but there were occassional times when I truly feel thankful for the things in life:)

seize the day. the time is now.

Happy New Year To All!

2012-01-22T14:53:00.002+08:00

I love how God is always blessing me in life♥

Three weeks of School had passed. It is good to have productive English lessons :) I had already written four English essays in total ever since School started so things were considered good. I love it when I am able to pick up my pen and start writing again, I love writing though I still can't get back what I used to get, maybe Mr Desmond Tan is strict or perhaps, it's the gap between N and O levels which explains the difference in the essay grades.

It is cny period and I still have work to do. I can't blame anyone since I am the one taking my O's this year and I very much hoped I can get a good credit for my O's. Though, I may be busy but I still hope I can devote some time to the Lord. Sometimes, I multi-task. Like I would mug and listen to Christian Songs, it makes me feel that God is there for me:D really grateful for his great love.

PS my new "baby" arrived last night:D ITS ALL YOURS - Dad to me.
What else can I say ^^

NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS

2012-01-01T14:09:00.004+08:00

(For 2011's)

New Year Resolutions/What I want to Attain for 2011:

Strive for N's!
Have a more solid faith in God.
Save 2 bucks every single day.
Build up a strong perseverance character in me.
Do well in atleast *one thing. (like get an A? know what I'm good in/at? ace something?)

In conclusion: I don't think I really strive that hard for N's. Of course, I failed to save 2 bucks every day and yes, maybe I did built a stronger perseverance character in me.

(For 2012's)

RESOLUTIONS:

1. Have the heart to mug and do better academically.
2. Fulfil my biggest desires.
3. Good time management.
4. Be a better Christian(as in I hope I continue to go for Fellowship though very often, my heart tells me one thing and my mind tells me another)
5. Save one dollar every day.

GOODBYE 2011

2011-12-31T19:10:00.005+08:00

BUT THOSE WHO HOPE IN THE LORD WILL RENEW THEIR STRENGTH.

Dear Lord Jesus,

I pray for a joyous 2012 ahead, may you shower us with your abundant blessings and continue to bless us with your great miracles. I pray that my Family, Friends and I will achieve great happiness for 2012 and be in a pink health to face all up and downs for the coming year. As every obstacle challenges us, please remind us that we need to toughen up and even if we're weak, we will be strong because you are with us. Also, please remember my biggest desires Lord. Give us the mind to focus, the right attitude to work towards our goals in life. God, I pray for wisdom. I pray for a heart to grow in Christ too.

In Jesus greatest name,
Amen.

Blessings in my life

2011-12-29T15:31:00.005+08:00

Accomplishments this year:

Interhouse Volleyball champ.
Top 25% Edusave Bursary.
Improvement award in Church.
Maths improvement Award.

Other accomplishments:
Own the class in one English test.
Ranking 3rd in Chinese(4NA2)
Pass N levels.
(Ms Lee NL is nice, she smsed me: to be able to get to sec 5, it is already an achievement.)
I kept an affair for exactly one year:) (my ex-affair says this is also an achievement.)

Littlest accomplishments:
Mastering piano in process.

Presents from Christmas:
Metal cup from Dad's church.
SZ's personal gift and my own church's gift.(awaiting)

Other presents:
Graduation Gift from Sunday School.
Ms Tan's gift.
Church camp Pen for ranking 2nd in overall as a camp group.

And Thank God for new friends;I considered this as a blessing too.
Friends like Delphine, Shin Ler, Betsy, Joshua etc

Of course, Thank God for closer friendship with others too:)

Holiday gifts:
2 new school shoes.
New file(with fran)
New Schoolbag(with fran)
New wallet(with fran, just that she bought hers and I got it as a birthday gift in April.)
7 new shirts(one is a gift)
3 new pair of pants
1 pair of silver new shoes
Purple earpiece from Dad
3 Free Buffets( from mr chong, sz laoshi and aunt/uncle)

Piano lessons are another blessing from God:)
And next year, I will be taking up something else.
I don't know how I am going to juggle between studies and music but personally, with time management and certain sacrifices like computer games will certainly do me good. I really love string instruments and God, you know my biggest desires.

So what I called a perfectionist life next year, may sound very demanding to myself but if this is what I want, then I have to be bent on doing them against all odds.

For I have God which will make All things impossible.

6H BBQ GATHERING ON THE 27TH DEC

2011-12-29T15:25:00.002+08:00

Okay so well, good moments :)

IT'S CHRISTMAS!

2011-12-25T17:07:00.005+08:00

Christmas Eve: Dim Sum with parents at Red Star Restaurant near Chinatown!
It's a dim sum restaurant and the bill was already near $70, I have to say, it is totally not worth it!!

Christmas, once again, another boring year with no festive mood and then again, come to think about it, it's Singapore. Faith, what do'you expect! what can you expect! But really, it's not about having wild parties and then to forget the real meaning of Christmas.

Thousands of years ago, Jesus died on the cross for our sins. HE DID IT OUT OF LOVE.
So Christmas, it's not about getting indulge in good food, turkey logcake etc and Xmas sales and stuff from the World but rather we should really hold in memory of what Christ had done for us, sinners. Thank you Jesus.

Okay so it will be like another six days and let's bid goodbye to 2011.
Here comes my O levels period then and I do not know how to feel except that the fact that, the more I think of it, the more I am dreading it but it has got to come and go anyway since I've taken the secondary five route. Another measure of our intellectual ability and God is with us. So let us put our hope in Him to let us survive through another criticial year.

Amen.

2011-12-22T18:41:00.000+08:00

NTU's huge fries!

Dear Jesus,

2011-12-20T10:40:00.001+08:00

thank you for everything in my life,
those fluctuations that brought me this far today,

thank you for being there with me,
always remind me that you are in control no matter what,

thank you for your love and thank you for saving me,
lord, don't forget my biggest desires, and please give me the heart to mug for O's.

give me the heart to grow in Christ.

Lord, I know next year will probably be very stressful and difficult to get by but with your amazing miracles, please pull me through the crucial period of my life.

Open up my mind' Lord, don't let me be so dense anymore.
I trust you Lord, you have plans for me that will prosper me and not harm me.

Lord, give me the wisdom and knowledge and the faith to get through 2012.

Amen

2011-12-19T16:10:00.002+08:00

I trust God's timetable.

It's good that I pass, just that it's not enough.
But I will fulfill the promise that I promised God.

God, use me to glorify your name..

In life, I accept failures, I accept setbacks, I have so many disappointments till the point whereas I already feel so numb to all of that. I understand that life is tough and we DO NOT always get what we want. However, I continue to trust in You.

Sometimes, it feels like you are not answering to my prayers but then again, everything is within your control. I don't get what I want, it's okay, I am still thankful for whatever that I achieved.

All I have to do is to try harder next time. It's not over yet.. I am not defeated yet.

I love you Jesus!

BYEBYE 少年圣经坊!

2011-12-18T20:09:00.003+08:00

Ok graduated today:)

Church at 9am coz need to lingshi with wenkai:) and then I'm gonna miss sunday school >< really like the gift that they prepared! :D and then I love my class; I love 4B v much <3 hahahah. okay so 1723 next year :/ and then no more zuo friend. haah got the improvement award( a voucher) :) and today is a great day :)

PS: Results tomorrow! God, the results are up to you.

2011-12-07T14:03:00.003+08:00

I am going to try.

Not spending a cent at all.
And just survive a day solely on plain water and prunes and probably some cheese biscuits.

Then $10 goes in my savings :D

Me against my temptation of food. ><

well...

Happy girl!

2011-12-03T22:43:00.003+08:00

1. New school bag!! :) love it. got the same for fran too ^_^ and fran loves it as well!

2. Got a new shirt! :) + 3 shirts fran got for me from msia not long ago! so total of 4 new shirts!

3. Christmas is near again.. I love Christmas!! I love the carols :))

4. First time trying out Thai Express. Not very to my liking :/

5. Church tomorrow!! However, I have this feeling that tomorrow is going to be boring though we're going out to eat as a camp group!!

Church Camp

2011-12-02T17:41:00.003+08:00

Church camp was great! :) got a private room with another three of my friends so it's pretty cool, we don't have to cram with like 14 peeps in a room!

Day 1: The best part of the day will be the 夜间游戏! From 7pm till 11pm plus we were having a stroll + games at a nearby hillside. Good experience to walk in muddy places and in darkness with just a few torchlights! Halfway, we were blindfolded and the moment we took it off, we were surrounded with hills, a good view of stars and just the nature. I really love the nature! :) the p6s kept screaming for nothing and they were very chatty, guess it's due to the fear of the darkness. And then many slipped, hahaha I was lucky enough that the guy in front of me allowed me to grab his shirt whenever I need to, really grateful to him. So I got both in front and behind to hold onto so it's quite safe for me! :) prata and teh for supper! first time drinking teh ew but it's ok :) bathed at 12am plus and then couldn't sleep cos it was freezing cold!

Day 2: First time saying an impromptu ending prayer in front of everybody! :) cos it was my grp to do the lead worship. watched "UP" too :) then had to prepare for “福音Alarm" which is a short advertisement! leader and assistant don't have roles to do :D And so the best part of the day will be the 迷你运动会, there are two games "Angry Bird" and "Water Volleyball" :) Dinner was really sumptuous! there was like spaghetti, fries, buns, coleslaw, chicken cutlet, mushroom soup, longan dessert etc and then ShuZi 老师 offered me herbal tea which is very nice! had 3 cups of that... I love tea!! :) performance night was ok:) wanted to hangout after bath time with my friends, and it was 12:30am plus going to 1am, we were watching the tv “边缘父子”but halfway we had to go back to our room :/

Day 3: Had a Gd sleep the night before! :) group sharing and did a short 开始祷告 for the group :) then had to go back to rooms and pack up. lastly, had 分享 and everyone had to one by one say some words to everyone. had our lunch togther and then back to church ^^

(So my group "Daniel,但以理" happen to have the most no. of people (we have 10) while Jiaxuan's group had the least which is 7. I was the assistant leader while Terence is my leader, but kinda glad to have him as my leader, atleast he's reliable ^^, overall, the camp consist of five groups and my group won 2nd in place, I always have the affinity with number 2. We got 18points and the first group got 19)

hahaha I really don't know what to post about :) but I just wanna randomly write something in memory of what I did when I am 16 years old. okay that's about it!!!!!

Unspoken "ideal life"

2011-11-30T00:04:00.002+08:00

Read through the dailybibleverse and came across this commentary "God's Word gives us lighthouses of hope to help us navigate through the dark moments of our soul."

Well... when all seems hopeless, well, it's not what it seems to be. (if you get what I mean)

I just went for a 3D2N camp and came back this afternoon. The camp was okay. Well, I will post about the camp another time since right now, I can't seems to find the inspiration to blog and the right words and what to say, what to feel etc ughh

So I came across this at someone's facebook profile:

I can't talk to you anymore, it's not that I am mad at you,
it's just that when I talk to you I realize how much I love you and when I realise how much i love you, I realize I can't have you and that makes me love you even more.

I wonder what am I thinking. Where did all that courage came from.
I really like talking to you but it makes me feel ....

2011-11-26T17:58:00.003+08:00

I'm tired. The blisters don't hurt anymore. And I'm rather satisfied. Holidays have started and while in the mood of not doing anything, time just slipped by real fast and November is already coming to an end which means about 20 plus days to the day of results - Survive or die. :/

Today: Buffet at some restaurant at Orchard. Not in that big appetite today but kinda like spending quality time with church class, something like that... and then it rained and we were half-drenched and then Ion Prologue to do some random book-shopping and that's about it, okay... so kinda regret wearing new shoes today cos it only rewards me with painful blisters and slow me down.

Fri: Went back to Church at 3pm to meet up with a few of my grp members to finish up the flag, think up of a cheer, deco the nametags etc. Thank God, everything is so far so good, all done! I kinda am afraid to go to camps, I wonder why :/

Alright, just sayin' but I feel that I will miss you the most after we graduate :(

Truth to be told,

2011-11-20T19:03:00.002+08:00

I'm disappointed.

But this is life. you don't always get what you want

2011-11-19T22:14:00.001+08:00

Singapore is utterly boring.

But hey, Christmas Sales are here! ;)

Random

2011-11-15T20:27:00.000+08:00

Why do I often question myself of what do I want in life?
Is it just me or does everyone often do that too?
What exactly do I want to achieve, is there really some sort of meaningful purpose afterall?
And sometimes, I really wished I could have a really best friend to confide into, but other times,
it feels like it's best to not leak out any of the personal feelings.

Why do I find advices annoying?

And Who knows, people might think that I wanted attention but that's not the case.

I wished I had homework to do or some classes to attend to.
Besides just loafing around, I miss learning.

I wished I was busy, not with holiday jobs though but I wished I could managed my time well,
and do some brushing up on my Languages and spend my time wisely.

I don't get how at this period of "age", people like to use the word "childish" and "immature" to provoke one another.

On a side note:
I'm kind of disappointed that I won't be going tomorrow with gramps and aunt to the new flowery garden park
at Marina Bay Sands area. I will be going for curry fish instead, have to say, due to peer pressure.

Holidays

2011-11-15T13:51:00.003+08:00

November,
It is going to be the slackest month ever for this year.

It seems like I am spending most of my days indoors and then do nothing much but I don't feel bored at all. In fact, it feels that like a long rest to me after all the conquering with the papers and I guess this is what holiday mood was supposed to be in the first place.

Did'went out but really it became once in a while thing cos I really enjoyed staying at home even if it's just facebook or the teevee or the piano to entertain me.

Piano lesson 4 was really stupid -______- Mom was using the cane as a pointer but it feels threatening somehow and I couldn't concentrate at all so end up playing like trash. Meh

Been pretty good at saving $ recently wooots ^^
okay but need to choose milo + biscuit for dinner :/ in order to save more.

This year, I had so far only read a pathetic number of books. Yingluo, definitely would have read a lot more than me. Don't really fancy fiction books now except for thrillers. Last night, Chantel wanted me to go to the library with her to get some books to read but I flatly rejected her.

I feel like I should like "solid up" my faith with Christ so I should read the bible more instead.
This would be my second time reading the bible :))

oh'rite!

Food Hunt the world' awaits of you

2011-11-10T21:23:00.003+08:00

I'm going to get this cute monkey hat for Christmas!!

Just kidding. Christmas in sg will be just soooooooooo boring. Can you believe it? why am I not a European. I want a White Christmas! :(

Today,

First stop of Food Hunt at Bugis_Katong Laksa:)
Second stop of Food Hunt at Vivo_Ice cream:)
Third stop of Food Hunt at Still Vivo_Chicken Chop(Y)(Y)!

feels rather creepy to be near bedok reservoir at one point :/
the many stories at that place.

And last stop of Food Hunt at Taman Jurong_ first time settle dinner at a tze char stall with Chantel.

We ordered Beansprout and Chicken Wing, Rice.
And lastly, Beancurd_at home! but it sucks actually. too much of the milky soya bean taste.

So anyway, food hunt wasn't VERY satisfying cause we end up travelling too much by train and bus! :O better luck next time!

And.................

Dad bought me a present :D

It's a beauty! ^_^

Ah I want to travel travel travel travel travel travel travel.
I want to see the world and so glad that you are back in sg! ^_^