Say it, with Sam

Women in the Workplace

2012-08-28T13:32:00.000+02:00

Watching the news of recently, I realised that despite women making up 52% of the working population, we are still far below the percentage scale in terms of holding high corporate positions. As far as corporate structure goes, women are at a complete disadvantage. We have had the hardest time climbing the corporate ladder, perhaps due to it being a conventionally male-dominating field and possibly also due to society’s perception of where women should be. Women have been typecast either too fragile or highly emotional to be able to cope with the day-to-day running of a workforce. Only we can change this Ladies. Check out some winning tips belowJ

12 Tips for women in the workplace

· Act like a lady, think like a man. Empower yourself using every tool available. Start with knowledge. It is power.

· Dress conservatively. Statistics show that women are taken far more seriously when they dressed authoritatively.

· Professionalism. This can help your employer decide whether you are worthy of promotions and raises.

· Stand up for yourself. Don't accept something at face value if you know you are right.

· Project confidence. Make eye contact with everyone. Don't nod your head. You are not weak.

· Personal issues. Personal issues can impact on your job and ultimately your ability to advance your career. Keep it separate from your work life.

· Let loose. We are already at a disadvantage because we work so damn hard to be taken seriously. People who have more fun are happier. Happier people are more successful because they are more confident and more pleasant to be around.

· Find your place in the hierarchy. Find a goal and go for it. There will be ups and downs, but if you are determined enough, you will achieve everything.

· Share you concerns. If something is causing stress at work, don’t be tempted to internalise it. This does not work. You will regret it in the long run.

· Choose your battles. Know when to speak and when to shut up. If you are fighting a losing battle, keep calm and think. Always think before reacting. Know what to say and how to say it, and most importantly when to say it.

· Gossip. Stay away from this like it’s the plague. It’s embarrassing. Don't listen to it or entertain it. You’ll have nothing to gain from it, except a bad reputation.

· Don’t get into a rut. Consider ending your employment on YOUR terms and if your situation is untenable. Your family and your wellbeing should come first. Bottom line: If this job is not a good fit for you and your family go for better.

It’s seems unfair that women need to implement so many rules to be taken seriously. But, a great man once said that we should be the change we want to see. So, while we may have to grind out teeth and bare the obvious unfairness in this seemingly male-dominated arena, we must know, that with the right attitude in our heads and goals in our heart, we are definitely a force to be reckoned with. So ladies, stand up for yourself and have faith in your abilities because very soon this very article will be written about the opposite sex.

Catch my other blog www.easy-editing.blogspot.com

Being a single parent

2012-08-28T13:31:00.000+02:00

With the circumstances today, and the unfortunate inevitabilities of life, many of us are forced to become single parents. It can happen to you at any moment in your life. Perhaps, through the death of a spouse, divorce, abandonment or often – just plain choice. Whatever the case may be, I think what matters the most is that we come out of it in charge and completely aware of the situation, as well as the choices we have within our control.

Here are a few excellent suggestions to maintain a healthy mental state, thrive as an person and care for your child/ren in the best possible manner.

· Take responsibility. Know that you had your part to play in it but don't beat yourself up. Never let your circumstances make you anyone’s dart board, take advantage of you or force you into a decision you aren't 100% comfortable with.

· Maintain a blameless mindset. Blaming yourself won’t help anyone and can often worsen matters.

· Accept support. Remember there are many good, kind, loving people who are with you and want to help. There are also very helpful state funded grants etc out there. Never feel shy to make use of any and all facilities available to you.

· Spiritual healing. It does work for some.

· Your little one. Remember that your child is now your number one priority.

· Seek outside help. There are various hospitals and crisis centres, social workers or other social agencies that can help you.

· Safety first. If you are in a bad neighbourhood or an unhealthy relationship, leave. Your safety and the safety of your child/ren is of priority now.

· Believe in yourself. Know that you can succeed at anything and that you are strong.

· Overlook. Ignore people who are critical of you. You have a bigger goal to focus on.

· Learn CPR. Take infant and child CPR classes. You never know when you’ll need it.

· Love yourself. Remember every day is a new beginning, and YOU are the architect of your future.

Being a single parent is extremely overwhelming. It can be hard to get your head around the surroundings of your new set up and you may be struggling to cope with feelings of loneliness. It’s normal. Remember, that it takes time for everyone to get used to the transition and, as a parent, your main concern should be how to support your child through this process that more often than not – they don't understand. Most importantly, what’s important is, to look after yourself. Get help if you need it. you can only take care of someone if you know how to take care of yourself.

-S

www.easy-editing.blogspot.com

Crazy Sexy Cool

2012-08-17T15:03:00.000+02:00

Want a personalised space that’s just yours? Do you need a little room made up just for the little one? Are you looking for a specific atmosphere or vibe? Then visit CrazySexyCool Wall Decals where you can decorate your walls and create just about anything. All they need to get started is a smooth surface. Sit back and watch CrazySexyCool reflect your individuality. What’s more is that they even do shop window displays!

Now, a lot of you are probably wondering “Decals?”

What are Decals?

Wall Decals (also called wall vinyl stickers) can transform any room from blank and boring to stylish and unique. It’s an enjoyable way to personalise your surroundings in line with your likes and choices. The vinyl used for the stickers are made from high quality vinyl and are available in many different colours for you to select from. The ranges can even between fluorescents and metallic looks.

Stickers?

The stickers are applied relatively quickly and are very easy to change, should your not be happy with it after a while. The stickers can be stuck on any smooth surface, such as; smooth walls, windows, doors, glass, floors, etc. Remember, that Wall Decals can be used in offices, shops, on shop windows, homes and even rental homes as it does not damage painted walls.

Why vinyls?

Vinyl stickers for walls are expressions of individual personality and style. When installing there is no mess, as with painting, but the decals can create an illusion of a painted-on design when especially using matt decals. You do not have to have artistic skills or be a state-of-the-art home decorator to make your plain living space wonderful, by simply using wall decals. Wall decals are just as easy to remove as they are to apply, without ever having to worry about ruining the surface of the wall.

How?

Step 1. So come browse the Decals Shop or do a Custom Decal Request.

Step 2. Follow installation instructions included in your package or we can do the installation for you.

Step 3. Enjoy! Your space has now been transformed by +Chantelle Wasserman

The person behind CrazySexyCool

Chantelle Wasserman is the owner, designer and manufacturer of CrazySexyCool Wall Decals. She is kind of person who loves bright colours and bold tones and can materialise your personality into a visual work of art. She believes it should be easy to decorate, which is the reason behind CrazySexyCool Wall Decals. She can transform a boring atmosphere into a space filled with character and style. Wall Decals are a simple and modern way to enhance your mood and lifestyle. Then when you feel like a change, you can very simply change motif and colours in a snap. It’s that simple.

Browse through the awesome designs in the Decals Shop, ask for a quote on Custom Decals, or read our Sticker Blog for some inspiration.

I know what my next project is now going to be...

-S

Catch my other blog www.easy-editing.blogspot.com

Letting go

2012-08-13T11:20:00.000+02:00

“Let go” ... How many times have you heard someone say this? How many times have you wondered “what does this even mean?” “How do I do it?” Pondering upon this very phrase for a while now, I have taken it to mean that you sometimes have to let sleeping dogs lie. It doesn't mean that you destroy them or throw them away. Put them aside (for a bit).

When do we have to let go?

There are many situations where we have to let go of something, a cheating partner perhaps, an abusive person, the loss of someone or, sometimes, just a memory. Whatever the hidden reasons are, you can only move forward if you aren't holding onto the baggages of the past.

Why do we have to let go?

You can’t heal if the pain doesn’t go away & you can only be at peace if you face your demons. Trusting another person is a reflection of how much you trust yourself to be strong enough to deal with possibly losing them. Never beat yourself up. You made it through your last experience & you will certainly make it though this one.

The change begins with you: How to let go of the past

Accept that the past cannot be undone. Tell yourself that you did your best in the circumstances & if you had a chance to go back, you would do the exact things again because that's who you were & that's what you knew then.

Forgive your mistakes. Constant reminiscing on what you could've, should've or would’ve done is unhealthy & pointless.

Own your thoughts. Train your mind to gently draw itself back to the present when your mind wanders to hurtful moments.

Time heals. All wounds heal no matter how you feel right now. Scars remind us of how strong we are.

Meet new people. You don't have to produce another life but try freeing yourself up to new possibilities.

Find yourself. Learn something new. You’d be amazed at how much of fun you’ll have.

Volunteer your time. Help someone needy. You’ll be shocked at how someone else’s pain can make you forget your own.

Confessions. Express your emotions & let them know you have moved on.

Forgiveness. It is the keying to finding your inner hero.

In summary

View life as an unravelling of possibilities. Nothing is really lost, because every path not taken is a discovery. You have boundless opportunities ahead of you, all equally good. Letting go of one thing means you can grab another. Remember how Tarzan swung from vine to vine, catching as he let go? Well, so can you, as you glide through life with enthusiasm & marvel, instead of clutching on to one single vine & maintaining that this is it for you. Remember, letting go is not the same as giving up.

-S

Kim Kardashian comes apart

2012-06-15T14:51:00.000+02:00

For a style icon who is constantly in the public eye, you’d think Kim Kardashian would pay more attention to her appearance.

Take the past week for example. This truly has got to have been the worse week for the paparazzi-loving personality. She has had numerous wardrobe FAILS this week alone, three to be precise. The first public blunder was a clothing tag which was completely visible, followed by her spanx showing. One would beg to ask the question of why then was she wearing such a sheer number, anyway? Whatever way you look at this, it has got to hurt her ego.

This brings us to the cherry on the top of, hopefully, her final instalment. Kim’s dress ripped apart as she was about to make an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live. The zip on her black leather bodycon dress tore apart before this major appearance, leaving the damsel in much of a distress. I don't think it could manage her curves much less her narcissism and the poor zipper split.

Now, surely you would know when something isn’t going to fit you, right. So get a bigger size I’d say. There is no harm in it. It’s is not like anyone of us would even know, and I’m sure many of us don't even care.

Quick to salvage her reputation, the star tweeted about her dress room disaster: “About to do Jimmy Kimmel & my whole dress rips! Help!!!” Suffice it to say, within record time, her stylist godmothers were there, sewing up Cinderella for the ball.

Was it a true wardrobe crash for Kim, or another strategic ploy to get into the media, yet again? Who knows.

Well, whatever the case, love or hate this star, we are inescapably drawn to her antics.

Until next time....

-Sam

Do Rhetorical Questions Need a Question Mark?

2012-06-12T15:13:00.000+02:00

Hello people,

So, having dinner the other night with some friends, we got into random conversations about rhetorical questions and after a few "glasses" there was a lot of fog surrounding the rules that apply to it. So, I thought, why not...and here you have it...we are going to discuss two kinds of peculiar questions. Isn’t that going to be fun! "Isn't that going to be fun," is a rhetorical question, by the way:) We’re also going to learn about its cousin. That’s called a tag question (It's going to be fun, isn't it?).

Rhetorical Questions

You’ve probably heard rhetorical questions more often than you realise. You start a sentence with a negative word when you mean something positive. So “Wasn’t that movie great?” means that you think the movie was great. It seems counterintuitive, but that’s the way English works. It’s called a rhetorical question, and it can end in either a question mark or an exclamation point, and in dialogue you can sometimes even have a speaker’s rhetorical question end in a period.

Another example of a rhetorical question is “Isn’t she leaving?” That question means you think the woman is leaving, but you want to confirm. Rhetorical questions like this take a negative form. If you make the “Isn’t she leaving?” question positive, it becomes just a regular question: “Is she leaving?” If you ask "Is she leaving?" you don’t know the answer; whereas with the rhetorical question “Isn’t she leaving?” you are assuming she is leaving.

Rhetorical questions have popped up in pop music. Stevie Wonder, for example, wrote a famous song called “Isn’t She Lovely,” whose lyrics begin:

“Isn't she lovely,

Isn't she wonderful,

Isn't she precious,” (2)

Mr Wonder definitely thinks the girl is lovely, wonderful, and precious. No question about that.

These kinds of rhetorical questions seem to be quite conversational. You wouldn’t want to write, “Aren’t I the perfect person for this job?” in a job cover letter, nor would you want to say, “Isn’t it obvious that you should hire me?” in an interview. There are better ways to sound more qualified and more professional. So, Aaron: no, it’s not advisable to use this kind of construction in formal situations.

Tag Questions

The second kind of question we’re talking about is called a tag question. “Tag questions, a peculiarity of English, are usually more spoken rather than written. The rhetorical question “Isn't she leaving?” means about the same thing as “She is leaving, isn’t she?” Students who are learning English often find this kind of construction puzzling because the speaker uses a negative form to mean something positive. As the Interesting Thing of the Day website wisely explains, “The simplest way to make a tag question in English is to repeat the verb, negate it, and then repeat the subject. For example, ‘He is smart’ becomes ‘He is smart, isn’t he?" Note how the word "isn't" is negating the verb "is" from the first part of the sentence: "He IS smart, ISN'T he?"

"If the verb is already negative, you just make it positive. ‘It won’t rain’ becomes ‘It won’t rain, will it?’" So, if we wanted to change Aaron’s rhetorical question “Isn’t it funny?” into a tag question, we would say, “It’s funny, isn’t it?” Both sentences mean “I think it’s funny.”

One clue that tag questions are best left to informal situations is that you often hear them used with contractions, which themselves are a bit informal. It would sound weird to ask "It will not rain, will it?" It sounds much more normal with a contraction: "It won't rain, will it?"

Summary

In summary, rhetorical questions and tag questions are normal parts of everyday speech, but they are informal. It’s therefore best to avoid them in formal situations.

Enjoy!!

-S

MTN’s disgusting service delivery

2012-06-01T09:30:00.001+02:00

Over the past few weeks I have had endless drama with MTN. From being in a position where I wanted to cancel my account with them and change service providers because of their inability to explain why I am always in arrears on their billing system, to being offered a handset I have always wanted and mind you still don't have, to being in a position where I am paying them but have no handset and have no apparent recourse.

How it all started

Four weeks ago, roughly, I was in conversation with an operator at MTN regarding cancelling my contract. They inquired as to the reason behind me wanting to cancel and offered me their “unbeatable” specials. After a while, I thought why not, upgrading with them would definitely save me time it would take to get a new contract. After receiving numerous calls from the consultants I agreed to go ahead with the upgrade. Every few days I would have to call them and ask when I could come in and pick up my handset as my current contract termination date was nearing and I didn't want to be in a position where I am sitting without a phone. I would always get an excuse. And often get offered a handset that was much more expensive. This started feeling a bit strange and really didn't make sense because the offer I was made was a current special. So...how come there was always NO STOCK. Surely, if you are advertising a special you need to cater for stock sufficiently or order timeously. So, I sent a complaint though to MTN (on their website complaints section). I also decided to carry out my own investigations. I called a few branches...and what do you know? None of the branches had stock. Chatsworth, Westville (2 stores), Westwood etc. Very suspicious, it seemed. So I sent another complaint via email to all of MTN.

So, naturally frustrated, I told them not to worry. That I would acquire the handset elsewhere. This was when some actual work was carried out on their part. They called me on a Friday (25 May 2012) to say that I could come pick up a handset on 26 May 2012, (as they had sent someone to another branch and have finally located a handset for me). Fine... I went in to pick up my handset. While providing the necessary signatures, I was told that with MTN there is an upgrade fee...O-K!!! This was a huge shock as most cell phone service providers don't even charge a sim and connection fee. So, to my mind, it would be more beneficial financially, to cancel your contract and get a new one. This seemed like a total money-making scheme to me.

The initial problem

Anyway, I take the handset back home and start the mandatory charge. 2 hours later I notice that the phone isn’t charging. So I assume that there is probably something wrong with the plug point. So I try charging the phone at several plug points around the house – ALL DON’T SEEM TO WORK. I wait, and the next day, I try a friend’s charger. That eventually works. At this point I know that some contents of the package are faulty. I try the USB and that seems to work. I lay a complaint with MTN, yet again. I mean, I am not going to keep a phone that obviously isn’t in 100% working order. So, a consultant tells me to bring in the accessories and since there is a 7-day return policy, I can exchange the phone for a new one. (Please note that in all of this I speak to another person at MTN who tells me that the phone will still work and the mandatory “initial charge” isn’t that important. Here, I have a “WTF” moment – if it isn’t compulsory why is recommended, you fool). Next, I get another call saying that there isn’t any stock of the phone. So what do I do now??? Am I expected to stay without a phone while MTN continues to bill me for a service they are clearly not providing!!!

I was later advised that they could cancel this contract and I could continue using my sim card on my old phone as the old contract only expires on 9 June 2012. However (and get this) I must pay for BIS AGAIN. So, I queried this. It appears that according to MTN, I am going to be billed for the full contract price, for 24 months, for my old contract ending in June, BUT I must pay AGAIN to reinstate the BIS on my phone. The guys I now spoke to at MTN gave me lip and had a terrible attitude. They said that I had chosen to upgrade to so they cancelled my BIS. And, if I want it again I need to pay. I couldn’t understand why but was advised that this was the only way. I sent ANOTHER complaint to MTN. Please note that at this point I have not received a single phone call from MTN to explain any of this, much less offer an apology.

In steps MTN Chatsworth

Samantha from the MTN Chatsworth branch advised that I should visit MTN Pavilion, to give back the phone and, afterward, cancelling the contract was entirely up to me if I was not pleased with the service MTN provided. Visiting the store was the single biggest mistake I made!!!!! Firstly, the people I was supposed to meet (Ashley) was the rudest person at the store. He brushed me and my husband off saying he was “too busy for us” and “can someone else please handle this”...to my fucking face. Now, I completely understand that being service providers, you are bound to be busy. But....surely being in a customer-facing environment, you should display some tact and respect a customer. I was not impressed with his condescending attitude. Still, I spoke to an indian girl at the counter. That was my second mistake. Because obviously trying to explain MY billing details to ME was way too burdensome on her poor soul. As if her rolling eyes and patronising tone wasn’t enough, I had to also deal with her unhelpful attitude.

It gets better

Apparently, she couldn’t guarantee me that my new upgrade hadn’t gone through. This is something else I couldn’t understand, as the MTN billing ends on the 20th of every month. So, to my mind, there was ample time for MTN to cancel the upgrade because it obviously didn't go through as yet. Also, adding to this, I didn't receive airtime etc for my new package so this reinstated the fact that everything could be reversed reasonably easily. The girl also mentioned that MTN Chatsworth had to keep an eye on their billing and reverse the charges immediately to avoid me being billed my new “contract fee” + upgrade fee. And, it actually gets more sickening than this, because apparently the “system” will most certainly take off the money and I will get it back....BUT...they can’t guarantee when and it will take more than 21 consecutive working days. At this point I lost it.

If you think that’s bad

I get a call on 30 May 2012, from a person from MTN Pietermaritzburg (Gugu), to inform me that I now need to sign forms and send it through to cancel my contract/migrate to prepaid etc AGAIN. I ALREADY DID THIS AT THE STORE RETARDS!! I don't understand why I should constantly be picking up after MTN whenever they decide that they don't want to do their work. Gugu also advised that the girl at MTN did not do her job properly (surprise, surprise). And that I should go BACK to the store to correct what they did. I advised the lady on the phone that there was NO WAY I was going to face those wretched people one more time. ALSO, who the hell is going to reimburse me for the petrol it takes me to constantly drive back and forth between several MTN branches – to sort out their mess!!! I don't mean to sound petty but, MTN is billing me left, right and centre for every charge they can find....why shouldn't I do the same??

Icing on the cake

She further advises that there was a huge error on my account. That she couldn’t confirm any of the amounts that will come off. That I will get my money back – but she’s not sure when. That the last fee for my old contract amount will come off end May. That the new contract amounts and upgrade fees (for a contract and phone I don't have) will come off end of June 2012. That she isn’t sure of the total/final charges. AND that since I chose to initially upgrade on a promotional handset, even if they pay me back it’s going to be minus a promotional fee. So the burning question....for fucking what???????? You should certainly charge me if you have actually provided a bloody service. Not for giving me the run-around, being rude, unhelpful, incompetent and a bunch of inefficient goats. If you are expecting me to be sorry about my insults then you are barking up the wrong tree. I am up to my wits end with you people. I have had enough!!

Cherry on top off the cake

I asked MTN if there was anyway I could stop them taking the money off my account unnecessarily. Firstly, “that’s what the computer does”, is what I got told. “Yes, because you are a flock of sheep who can’t possibly step out of your comfort zones, off your arses, to go the extra mile and assist a customer”, is what I thought. I mean why do you actually have to do some work when you are programmed to say “the computer says so”. I also offered to stop my debit orders and pay my account in cash every month to prevent the unnecessary debits and credits. To which the lady on the phone replied that I have that option but remember that MY name will get into disrepute with the credit bureau – it will affect my credit history and rating, and that in the end basically I’ll suffer. So....the solution...let MTN do whatever the fuck they want!!!

Consumer Protection Act (See Part G onward)

Could someone please tell me why the hell this piece of legislation was even promulgated? I am an ex-law student and know this Act inside out. Yet, service providers like MTN who are supposed to have this document stamped to their foreheads seem to have forgotten every rule in it. MTN seems to be under the misconception that they are exempt from it and also above the law, so much so, that my constitutionally protected and legislative rights are just water under the bridge for them.

What did I expect from MTN

For starters, a call would be nice. The decent thing would be to call me and at least try to offer some sort of assistance. I know that this is probably something foreign to you. Still, customer satisfaction should mean something to you.

...I will blow a fuse if someone tells me that they were not aware of what was going on. I sent emails to everyone. From www.mtnsp.co.za, to webmastermtnsp@mtn.co.za, to Prince Khumalo, Billy-Jean Peters, Elton Williams, Siyabonga Langeni and Farzanah Karriem, all of whom were useless in trying to assist me. Then comes into the picture Gugu (dlamin_g@mtn.co.za) who explained a lot of the details to me and advised a senior named Anderson would call me to rectify things and make my journey from hereon a little smoother, since what I have gone through this far is not acceptable in terms of standards (which I have yet to see). Several hours have passed since my conversation with Gugu and surprise, surprise AGAIN, not a single call has come through from MTN. And I highly doubt it will. Maybe Anderson is trying to save the planet. Because what else could be more important than doing your job???

My issues

· MTN has constantly provided a slapdash service to me.

· MTN advised that they will take money off my account and can’t tell me when I’ll get my refund.

· They will take off random amounts before my refund, which doesn’t make sense to me, and they can't viably explain it.

· They have treated me rudely and inappropriately up to this point.

· They can't effectively explain why my statements are constantly in arrears, in spite of me paying my account duly, every month.

· Their attitudes leave much to be desired.

· They basically told me they ARE going to take my money and there is nothing I can do about it, unless I want to get my name listed as a bad payer in the credit bureau.

· They will give me back all monies due to me, at some point, but can't guarantee exactly when.

· I can't cancel my debit order.

· Not a single reply to five of my complaints thus far.

· No apology yet.

So, I guess, me waiting for a response to this letter is similar to a dog chasing a car it doesn’t intend on catching. I won't hold my breath for a speedy resolution either as the service above speaks volumes about how much MTN actually cares about their customers. Be rest assured though, that every person I come into contact with will know of the terrible service I have received from you and no friend or family of mine will ever take out a contract with you EVER, much less upgrade.

Follow Facebook & Twitter for more of my thoughts on MTN's activities, ethics & acumen.

Disgusted at the service MTN provides

-S

Forget him, focus on you!!

2012-05-22T16:52:00.000+02:00

I recently tied the proverbial knot to my high school sweetheart. Guys, I must say that marriage may very well just be the best thing that has ever happened to me. That being said, I enjoy really those stolen moments to myself. Not picking up after someone, or tidying up the kitchen, or doing the laundry...How many of you out there can relate?

It’s so easy to lose yourself to someone...even easier to convince yourself that you are OK with doing just that! Do I have news for you! Watching that very scenario play out in other relationships has taught me not to make the same mistake – that means, loving ME.

To love me, I have to find ME

Don't get me wrong, I love my husband. He completes me & makes my life so meaningful... BUT Ladies, let’s face it, it’s not an obedient, slaving, “replacement for a mother” that he fell in love with, is it? It’s that feisty tigress, who is opinionated and loud, who makes him laugh, and who challenges his status quo to make him discover himself that he wants to be with. I’m sure you are similar in the things that count...you should be. But don’t lose yourself & start to emulate your partner...else, he may as well be married to, or date, himself.

I was lunching with friends, when we started discussing the things we do, when it’s just USJ

Try a few:

· Don’t bother combing your hair or using makeup

· Try a facialJ you’ll feel like a million bucks

· Walk around naked (after you get over the awkwardness, the freedom will be exhilarating)

· Throw away the stuff he has been hoarding. It’s therapeutic

· Wash your car... finally, it’s “your” time to enjoy that Lady

· Leave stuff lying around in the house, and say to yourself “you’ll stay there until I say so”

· Eat all the junk food you want (no guilt)

· Listen to "girly" music real loud & dance around the house, singing really loud (even if you are outta tune)

· Eat all the Lindt by yourself (they weren’t meant for sharing anyway)

· Watch tear-jerker romantic comedies (Notebook, The Vow). You can salivate over Channing Tatum all you want without feeling guilty. And, you won’t feel like slitting your wrists at the sight of a skinny, barber-doll heroine, whom you loathe for being so miserably perfect

· Hog the remote (**evil laugh**)

You don't have to predict his every move or even be perfect . . . be you!! Any chance that I get to be on my own – is my time. My time to indulge and let it loose! To be silly and give him a chance to miss me!! Look, I get that some couples are very “close-knit”, to say the least. But Ladies, remember that you can only be your best, as a partner, if you know who you are. You can also catch my articles at www.all4women.co.za

-Sam

http://www.easy-editing.webs.com

What are some ways to help your child improve their reading and writing skills?

2012-05-22T16:41:00.002+02:00

Hi guys,

Today, I want to discuss something really important: The future of our children. The issue of a child’s learning is so blatantly avoided that it could bring one to tears. Being one who would prefer to curb this growing threat to future generations...I’d like for you to take this problem really seriously. Our kids will potentially be around long after we have passed on. So why not build a solid foundation – starting at the beginning.

Research has shown that children whose parents (or any significant adults) read to them are always better students than those who are not read to. Reading to your child exposes him/her to vocabulary, sentence structure, communication skills, and logic. Reading to them shares the joy of reading and storytelling. Reading to them also gives you quality time together, which strengthens your child-parent bond.

1. Encourage your child to read

Provide plenty of reading material that will interest your child - either buy books or take them to the library every few days. If your child is interested in dinosaurs, have books about dinosaurs in the house - both science or non-fiction books and fiction or storybooks, because reading is not just for fun, but also for information. Find out what your child's interests are, and provide books that feed those interests.

2. Help your child

If your child is having trouble reading, first make sure they do not have some sort of correctable problem like poor eyesight. Work with the school to test for learning disabilities like dyslexia, which can cause poor reading skills. Help your child learn vocabulary and spelling so that they can read better – you can either have regular Q&A sessions where you quiz them on vocabulary and spelling words or you can make games like "Word of the Day" where you find fun ways to improve their vocabulary.

3. Set a regular time for schoolwork each day

This will also help with any school subject. Make a special place for them to do their work, someplace where they will not be distracted by a TV, games, cell phones, computer chat rooms, IMs, or anything else. Have at least one hour daily (some children will need longer) during which homework is done – if they say they do not have homework, then they will use the time to read over their material. During this time, you can "assign" reading and writing practice also – have them read a section, then quiz them to be sure they understand what they have read. You can show them how to read for information, how to tell when a term is important in a textbook, and where to look for definitions and more help.

4. Make reading and writing fun

Again, if you use your child's interests, you will have more luck with this. Encourage your child to make up stories and write them down. Don't worry about spelling or grammar at first – just get them to start writing! Read what they have written if they want you to, and talk about their stories over the dinner table, or in the car. The more you encourage them to read and write, the more they will want to – notice I said "encourage" and not nag. The trick is to make it fun for them.

Go the extra mile

· Buy a book that your child can read with slight difficulty and once you help them master the words in that book buy the next book up to that one and do the same again and so on.

· The best way to help a child learn to enjoy reading is to read with them!

· The best way to help children read better is to have a home where reading is a part of life. Start out reading to the child, and let the child see you reading for enjoyment.

· Write down the story he tells you then show it to him. Explain to him that he was the one who came up with that story. Then ask him to read the story.

· Many popular children's cartoons come in book form. You can also try comic books. You can both take a trip to a local comic book store and let him choose something he likes to read (Make sure it's age appropriate).

· Throw out your TV. A week without television has been shown to improve reading and attention span.

· Try getting a tape recorder and have him read a book aloud being taped and then play the tape back to himself while reading the book of his choice.

· Good old PHONICS help.

· Keep it simple with a lot of praise for doing well (not "good job") if it's not. Don't be negative but also don't "over praise" for non-performance. Make it fun.

· Read to him/her every night, preferably at the same time.

· Stop the story or the book at an interesting part, so that he'll look forward to the next night's story time.

· Let him choose books on subjects that he is interested in and pick one day out of the week where he gets to read whatever he wants to you!

· Make a trip to the bookstore fun and exciting...stop at the park first or get a treat afterwards.

· Let them look at the pages as you read.

-S

The Avengers: Movie Review

2012-05-21T09:59:00.000+02:00

It's been long guys, but back to work now:), I had to share possibly the best movie of the year with you guys!

A movie feverishly anticipated by comic book geeks, action freaks and superhero devotees, it’s almost impossible to fault The Avengers, now that it’s finally, actually here. The Avengers is truly a movie event on a spectacular scale and this adds an almost impossible level of expectation on Marvel, writer-director Joss Whedon and the cast to make all those fan boy fantasies come true.

Be assured, The Avengers is all that and a whole heap of fun to boot. We’ve all come to be familiar with the individual characters over the course of a few years, with two Iron Man movies, Thor and Captain America having been introduced in their own film franchises. All are present to reprise their roles, except Edward Norton who played Dr Bruce Banner in The Incredible Hulk and opted out of The Avengers to make way for Mark Ruffalo as the hot-headed green giant. (A sorely disappointing choice for me.)

As the film opens, the Avengers are scattered: Tony Stark is developing a new power source while living in bliss with Pepper Potts. Bruce Banner has exiled himself to India where he’s figured a way to keep "the other guy" at bay. Captain Steve Rogers is a super-soldier without a war to fight. Scarlet Johansson (Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow) gets a particularly great intro, while her fellow SHIELD agent Clint Barton/Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) is compromised early on when Loki makes his entrance.

When the gang finally comes together on SHIELD’s impressive aircraft carrier-cum-stealth flyer, it’s an incredibly thrilling moment, even though there is some serious doubt amongst them that it’s probably not the best idea, since one of them could explode into a destructive rage monster at any moment. Much in-fighting ensues, especially once Loki is captured and Thor crash-lands from Asgard to claim Loki as his prisoner to be dealt Asgardian justice. It’s pretty exciting just seeing all these larger than life characters all in a room together, sizing each other up and bickering like old friends.

That it all feels so natural and lived in is, of course, thanks to the wizardry of Joss Whedon himself, a true and devoted believer in the power of fantasy and science fiction as a means to explore real human relationships. The truly magical thing about The Avengers is how well-compartmentalised it all is, allowing each and every one of our heroes an almost equal amount of screen time to flesh out their character arcs and deal with a wealth of back-story and essentially build relationships as the franchise thunders along for who knows how many more years and spin-off films. This could so easily have been a case of too many cooks spoiling the broth, and in fact turns out to be the complete opposite. The Avengers works because each character’s voice and presence matters.

The cast

The cast is as close perfection as possible. I challenge anyone to suggest another actor who could infect Tony Stark with as much cockiness as Robert Downey Jr, or convey the inner turmoil of Captain America – a man out of time – with the kind of affecting strength Chris Evans has brought to the character. They may wear impressive (and skin-tight) costumes, but the actors’ performances give weight to the characters rather than shift the focus to their heroic alter egos.

Though it’s bad boy Loki (played by a dangerously magnetic Tom Hiddleston) who steals most of the scenes, torturing the Avengers with his withering wit and steely gaze as his plot to overtake Earth and make subjects of the human race is slowly revealed. That he is Thor’s brother complicates matters even further and together with Chris Hemsworth (as the Norse god of thunder...yummy!!!) Hiddleston’s Loki is always on the cusp of redemption (even though he’s crazier than an old lady with a bag of cats) and ever more lethal because of his sensitivity where Thor is concerned.

As expected, the chaos of the thrilling action scenes as Midtown Manhattan is being obliterated by Loki’s army is a head-spinning prospect as one superhero more powerful than the next gets a turn to shine. Joss Whedon’s distinctive voice can be heard throughout all of the characters’ attempts at one-upmanship. It’s there in Agent Phil Coulson’s barely concealed and very sweet Captain America fandom, in the unspoken competitiveness between Tony Stark and Bruce Banner, and the roguish fun that is promised around every corner.

The Avengers is exactly what it needed to be: Over the top but awe-inspiring, faithful to the characters and the comics, whip-smart and funny and, above all, an insanely good-looking.

Criticism

The plot surrounds Thor and Loki and takes off as a sequel to Thor almost. I believe, due to the Norse/Asgard influences/ themes, there should have been more substance to the characters of the aforementioned men. The film is also made to influence us into believing that Loki has some secret diabolic plan concerning Bruce Banner, but that also lies very weak in its plot. There is also a scene in the movie where our heroes bicker like little girls in the sandbox and suddenly we see Bruce with Loki’s staff in hand – that also does not tie up at all.

The Avengers smashes box office record

The Avengers launched the summer movie season with a $200.3m opening weekend domestically, by far the biggest debut ever. If distributor Disney's revenue estimate on Sunday holds when the final weekend count is released on Monday, The Avengers would be the first movie ever to haul in $200m in a single weekend. A $200m total for every movie in release is considered a great weekend for the business as a whole, so The Avengers redefines the standards for a blockbuster debut.

The Avengers shot past the previous record of $169.2m for the debut of last year's Harry Potter finale.

With $441.5m overseas since last week, The Avengers worldwide total climbed to $641.8m.

Overview

All in all, a brilliant watch for the young and old at heart. Action for all you fanatics out there, brilliant vocabulary for the nerdy folk, eye candy for us gals....and Chris Hemsworth for me. Enjoy!!

-S

Consumers called their BLUFF

2012-05-07T16:31:00.000+02:00

NO MORE BEEF IN MUTTON

Merely reading this article enraged me so much that I had to blog about it. Please beware when purchasing from the butchers you trust & you think you know!!

“The new regulations governing the labelling and advertising of food products came into effect last month, forcing food makers to come up with labels which reveal a lot more about what’s in their products than before.

That’s great news for consumers, but for some, the new, more revealing labels have made them realise, for the first time, what they’ve really been buying - and eating - all this time.

As a devout Hindu, Ashmina Maharaj of Umkomaas does not eat beef in accordance with her religion.

For years she's bought products labelled “mutton sausages” and “mutton mince” from Bluff Meat Supply’s Kingsburgh branch, believing the only meat in them to be mutton, as the labels didn’t say otherwise.

But recently she couldn’t find any mutton sausages in the butchery, so she made enquiries and was told they’d never sold pure mutton sausages - they had always been a mutton-beef combination.

Apparently this is a common practice in the industry, because of the high cost of lamb.

Bluff Meat Supply’s new label, on the same product, describes the sausages as Mutton Beef.

I found two different labels on the same product in the company’s Pinetown branch this week.

One stated just 'Mutton Beef', along with date it was packed and its weight and price.

The other has that information, plus a full breakdown of the ingredients, including the fact that it’s 38% mutton and 34% beef.

Ashmina is horrified that she’s been unwittingly eating beef, in these products, for years.

Responding, Mark Bielovich said the company had never made any claim to have produced or processed any product to conform to any specific religious beliefs and that its labels had never stated that the mutton sausage was pure mutton.

But he confirmed that the old label on the mutton beef sausages had made no reference to fact that there was beef mixed in with the mutton.

“We have many Hindu customers, many of whom would ask about the contents of processed products, thereby eliminating any confusion and ensuring that the processed product that they are purchasing does not contain an element that would defy their religious belief,” he said.

The company had always been willing to supply a specific product on request, he said.

Selling for at least R72 a kilo, pure mutton mince is significantly more expensive that mutton/beef blends.

“We sincerely apologise to Mrs Maharaj for any misunderstanding that has occurred in the past,” Bielovich said, “and would agree that the new legislation will allow the consumer to make more informed decisions as to the specifics of what they are purchasing,” Bielovich said.

Asked why she never queried the contents of the so-called mutton sausages before, given their relatively low price, Ashmina said she trusted the information which was printed on the labels.

As for why some labels on the mutton beef sausages in the Bluff Meat Supply store I visited had a full ingredients list, while others did not, Bielovich said the company had introduced the new full-disclosure labels at the beginning of the year, but that the labelling machine had been out of order for a short time, so the fresh meat labelling machine - which doesn’t produce detailed labels - had had to be used instead.

The new labelling regulations include what’s called QUID - Quantitative Ingredient Declarations.

What that means is if a food manufacturer emphasises a key ingredient in the name or description of a product, they have to say was the ingoing percentage of that ingredient is.

So in the case of mutton mince, the percentage of mutton in that mix must be revealed.

I did a whip around a few stand-alone butcheries and supermarket butcheries this week, and found that, by and large, the labels on mince and sausage packs are compliant.

They reveal the types of meat in the product and their various percentages.

At Checkers in Davenport Square, I found a pack of “mutton mince” at R80 a kilo, but no indication of the percentage of mutton in the mix.

When I asked a butchery employee, I was told it was 100% mutton - and the price appears to back that up, but the label ought to be clearer about this.

Across the way at Dirk’s Meats, I found a pack labelled Sausage Meat with a prominent Mutton sticker on it, selling for just R36 a kilo.

When I asked whether it was pure mutton, I was told there was beef in the mix as well.

Owner Peter Limbouris later conceded that the label didn’t comply with the regulations, and said the butchery was in the process of converting to the full disclosure labels, many of which are already in the store.

Right, so what do we need to take out of all of this?

All food labels should comply with the new labelling regs by now, but if you’re buying a sausage or mince product that’s labelled, mutton, say, and there is no breakdown of ingredients, don’t assume it’s pure mutton.

Ask the butchery staff.

The new full disclosure labels are there for your benefit, so use them - if you’re buying sausages, be they chicken, pork, or mutton, don’t only check what kind of meats are in them, but check out the percentages too, because that’s what determines the quality of the product.

If the price of the pack seems really good, it could be that the meat content is relatively low.

For example, Woolworths 500 gram pack of Porkies, at R24,99, are R10 cheaper than the same size pack of Woolies’ pork bangers. But if you examine the label, you’ll find that the Porkies are only 44% pork, while the bangers are 75% pork.

As always, knowledge is power. And as they say, the devil is in the small print!”

-Sam

Parts of Speech

2012-05-07T11:03:00.001+02:00

Hello Bloggers,

For today’s "imparting", I’d like to take you back to basics. I know everyone reading this has gone to school...still, how many of you actually remember the Rules/Parts of Speech?? Here’s a quick recap...Enjoy!

tenor (ten-er)

the subject of a metaphor, such as "she" in "she is a rose."

metaphor (met-uh-fawr, -fer)

a figure of speech in which a term or phrase is applied to something to which it is not literally applicable in order to suggest a resemblance, as in "a mighty fortress is our God."

parable (par-uh-buh?l)

a short allegorical story designed to illustrate or teach some truth, religious principle, or moral lesson.

simile (n.)

a figure of speech in which two unlike things are explicitly compared, as in "she is like a rose."

analogy (uh-nal-uh-jee)

a similarity between like features of two things, on which a comparison may be based.

allegory (al-uh-gawr-ee, -gohr-ee)

a representation of an abstract or spiritual meaning through concrete or material forms.

vehicle (n.)

the thing or idea to which the subject of a metaphor is compared, as "rose" in "she is a rose."

catachresis (n.)

misuse or strained use of words, as in a mixed metaphor, occurring either in error or for rhetorical effect.

Have fun playing with words:)

-S

Hello or Goodbye Peter?

2012-05-04T16:51:00.000+02:00

Hi guys,

Now, many of you are aware of the HelloPeter site, and most of you reading this have used it, on occasion. Now, there has been so much of hullabaloo about whether the site should get a yay or a nay!!

I have always been under the impression that HelloPeter is an accomplishment in terms of consumer activism. It serves as a platform where disgruntled consumers can report poor service or unfairness. Don't get me wrong, they aren't just about slating. Consumers are also welcome to post positive comments about great services received. Regardless of this balance, however, the site has received an onslaught of criticism. You be the judge!

The creator of the site, Peter Cheales, has been called an “extortionist”. This remark relates to the fact that in order for a company to respond to an aggrieved customer's comment, the company has to fork out the bucks! Many companies feel that they shouldn't have to pay for this privilege.

Amongst the various criticisms, is one that HelloPeter only lists companies on its “Compliments” list if they pay whereas even if a company does not pay, its details will go up on the “Complaints” list. HelloPeter has also been accused of providing misleading statistics and of deleting comments that were aimed at HelloPeter, itself.

Extortionist, maybe, but many consumers view HelloPeter's creator as a consumer champion since the site hands consumers a means to air their grievances and it forces companies to respond, in order for them to clear their bad reputation. This, in turn, promotes greater customer service as companies will try and avoid being mentioned on the site. The site is also free to the public which is appealing to consumers, the no-cost factor provides the incentive to log onto the site and speak their mind.

The choice is yours people. You can choose to commend or condemn the site! I for one am all for it. I mean, it certainly provides consumers with a tool with which to expose poor customer service. In my books, if it urges companies to become more pro-active and to start adopting customer satisfaction as a value, then it gets both thumbs up from me.

To decide for yourself visit www.hellopeter.com

-Sam

Facebook Privacy Measures

2012-05-04T16:15:00.002+02:00

Follow these guidelines to preserve your privacy...

1. Organise Facebook friends in lists

Friend Lists are the foundation of your Facebook privacy settings. Select Friends from the top menu, and use the Create link to create friend lists like Co-workers, Family, College Friends, etc. Your friends can’t see your lists, so you can name them whatever you like.

2. Customise Profile Privacy

Click Settings > Privacy Settings > Profile. Select which parts of your profile will be seen by whom. If you choose Customize in the drop down, you can be more specific. This is where the Friend Lists you created before become really useful.

Also go to the Contact Information tab and choose how you want your contact information to be shared on the Internet.

3. Set Facebook Privacy Level of Photo Albums

On the Photos tab of your profile page, click Album Privacy. Here again, you can use your Friend Lists to set the privacy for each photo album. Note that your profile pictures go into a special album that is always visible to ALL your friends.

4. Restrict search visibility

Click Privacy > Search to set your visibility when someone searches Facebook for people. This is an important way to safeguard your Facebook privacy.

5. Control automatic wall posts and news feed updates

Your actions in Facebook such as comments, likes, appear as highlights on ALL your friends’ home pages. You cannot use friend lists here, only turn them on or off. Go to Privacy > News Feed and Wall and make your selections.

6. Set Facebook wall privacy

Go to your profile page, click Options > Settings under the status box. Here you can control whether your friends can post to your Wall, and who can see the posts made by your friends.

7. Avoid appearing in advertisements

Facebook has two types of advertisements: third-party and Facebook. Third-party advertisements are currently not allowed to use your pictures, but there is a setting to disallow it if it is allowed in the future. Go to Privacy > News Feed and Wall > Facebook Ads tab to turn this off.

8. Protect yourself from friends’ applications

Go to Privacy > Applications, and click the Settings tab and uncheck all the boxes. These settings control what information about you is visible to applications installed by your friends.

By default, these are set to visible. This means that your information is readily available to one of the million worldwide Facebook application developers, each time any of your friends takes a quiz, plays a game, or runs any other Facebook app.

These settings control what applications installed by your friends can see about you, even if you don’t install the application yourself.

9. Privacy from your applications

There is no way to control what applications see about you; it is an all-or-nothing affair. The only thing you can do is to authorize only those applications you require and trust. Go to Settings > Application Settings from the top menu. Change the drop-down from Recently Used to Authorized.

Here you can see all the applications you have authorized to get access to ALL your profile information. Remove the ones you no longer need. Also check the list of applications Allowed to Post and Granted Additional Permissions to remove unwanted ones.

10. Quitting Facebook? Delete, don’t just De-Activate your account

You can easily deactivate your account in Facebook from the Settings page. But deactivation will retain all your profile information within Facebook, including pictures, friends, etc.

If you want to permanently delete your Facebook account, click here to submit a deletion request. Note that:

1. There is an unspecified delay between submitting your delete request and actual deletion.

2. If you login to Facebook, your deletion request is automatically cancelled.

3. There doesn’t seem to be any way to confirm that your request was completed.

4. Even after permanent deletion, copies of your photos may remain on their servers for technical reasons.

100% Pure South African Talent: Lungelo Nic Ngobese

2012-05-03T12:16:00.000+02:00

Today, I have the pleasure of writing about a really good friend. He is extremely talented in the art of putting together strings of words and creating a masterpiece. Nic, as we know him, is not only a brilliant writer but also has a really artistic mind when it comes to pouring out his heart into his pen only to etch eternal words of poetry that will make butterflies flutter around in your tummy and leave that warm fuzziness in your being...watch out for him guys.

I had the privilege of sifting through some of his material recently, and this bloke is so frickin’ talented. So, a while ago, Nic handed me a manuscript. “This is not complete, just go through it and tell me what you think”, he said. Little did I know what I was in store for!! He proved to be a powerhouse of talent. I sat with the raw manuscript in my hands and was thrilled by the choice of words he used, by the thought structure and especially the authenticity.

Anyone who knows this man will tell you that he is extremely modest, shy and most of all, humble. Nic has been called a “gentleman” time and time again and this reputation is tagged with his most polite mannerisms and the respect with which he treats everyone around him. A simple act like getting the door for a lady, or offering you his jacket when you are feeling cold, or, just letting someone have the last say. This, friends, is the brilliant-minded author I am telling you about. He is a paradox of modesty & immense talented. Nic takes his work very seriously and is open to all types of criticism. The mark of a true star, I think.

Well done on journeying toward your dream, Nic. I guess I should take your autograph now!!

(Watch this space for more news on this promising young writer!!)

-S

Hereafter: Movie Review

2012-05-03T10:04:00.000+02:00

Hi guys,

Last weekend I watched Hereafter. A movie where director Clint Eastwood delves into the mysterious world of the hereafter, an ensemble supernatural drama starring Matt Damon, Cécile De France, Jay Mohr, and Bryce Dallas Howard.

Brief Synopsis

In the wake of a near-death experience during a powerful tsunami, French television reporter Marie (De France) takes her married lover's advice to pen the political book she has always talked about writing. As hard as Marie tries to stay focused on the task at hand, however, she repeatedly finds her attention diverted to scientists who have been stigmatised for investigating the afterlife. Meanwhile, in America, reluctant psychic George (Matt Damon) struggles in vain to cease using his powers for profit while falling for a gorgeous stranger (Bryce Dallas Howard). All the while, his greedy brother (Jay Mohr) prods him to milk his ability for all it's worth. Over in London, a pair of inseparable twins is forcibly parted by tragedy when one of them dies suddenly. The harder the more introverted surviving twin (Frankie McLaren) attempts to reach out to his deceased brother in the afterlife, the deeper his mom sinks into heroin addiction. When his mother goes into rehab, the grieving boy is placed in foster care, and begins succumbing to his corrosive ennui.

My personal view

You might expect Hereafter, a movie centred on near-death experiences and visions of the afterlife, to be uplifting and exhilarating, especially with Clint Eastwood at the helm. You'd be right, but only for very brief moments in a two-hour film that, at times, seems like it's gone on for at least four hours. For the most part, Hereafter flat-lines. Clint Eastwood does his usual fabulous job, investing the film with mood and detail galore, and drawing affecting performances from Matt Damon, Cécile De France and Frankie and George McLaren.

The tsunami is a good reason to at least rent the movie when it comes out on DVD: Eastwood puts the viewer in the water with De France's character as she's tossed and tumbled down a chute of roiling water, debris, vehicles and bodies. A scene just before the tsunami strikes, as De France and other characters hear the water but still can't see it, chills to the bone: Standing in an outdoor market, the doomed can see palm trees in the distance snapping and disappearing, but don't yet know what's causing it. (I’d like to point out that this may just be the saving grace of the film.)

The script is so dull that the audience howled with relief anytime a teensy bit of humour worked its way in. Bryce Dallas Howard, wasted in a throwaway role that serves only to emphasise Damon's character's loneliness (which we already got, thanks), gets a huge laugh when her character, in a cooking class, notes, "The woman next to me brought her own knife. She's very intimidating." Yeah...that's how desperate we are for a laugh...or any emotion, for that matter. Damon winningly conveys his character's deep sadness and sense of alienation (although hearing, "It's not a gift, it's a curse," once, was enough) but his Eeyore-type slump and self-degradation get pretty old around the 90-minute mark.

The last 30 minutes of the film hint at what it might have been if someone had whipped that script into shape; the idea of exploring experiences of the afterlife was a great one, and Eastwood certainly has the vision to pull it off. But even the most talented doctor can't revive the really, most sincerely dead. And Hereafter, while not exactly DOA, never makes it out of the emergency room.

-S

What Is Standard English?

2012-05-02T16:09:00.000+02:00

Hello there,

Being very closely intertwined with the English language, I thought this to be a really interesting piece that I could share with you. Today we’re going to tackle an interesting question: When we talk about “Proper English,” what exactly do we mean? Do we mean the English that you can take home to your grandmother? Do we mean the English that will impress your boss? Or do we mean the English that everyone will understand?

Most of the time, we mean all these things. When we go looking for grammar guidance, we’re hoping to refine our tone, our sophistication, and our clarity. We want, at the end of the day, to be better writers.

But if we mean those things, then what we should really say is “Standard English”—although it would probably be even more accurate to say, “The English That a Very Few People Agreed Upon About 600 Years Ago and That We’re Now Mostly Stuck With.”

Because when we use the phrase “proper English,” we’re playing into a whole mess of stereotypes and misconceptions about language. All it takes is a quick look at the history of Standard English to see why this might be true.

Setting the Stage: The History of English

I like to think of a standard variety of language as the lingua franca for speakers of a single language. A speaker from West Texas, for instance, might have trouble understanding a speaker from South Boston, but neither one of them has any trouble watching the national news, which is conducted in Standard English—the type of English that just about everyone will understand wherever it’s spoken.

English first flirted with written standardisation back in the ninth century, when Alfred the Great noticed that everyone’s Latin wasn’t what it used to be (is it ever?) and requested Anglo-Saxon translations of “those books that are most necessary for all men to know.”

When William the Conqueror showed up in 1066, however, he brought with him a slew of scribes and courtiers whose languages of choice were Latin and Norman French, and English was more or less exiled to the monasteries for the next few centuries.

Still, English never ceased to be a widely spoken language. So when England ultimately distanced itself from France, English was right there waiting, ready to reassert itself into official business and the written record.

It happened slowly at first, but by the time of Henry V, English had displaced French as a language of government almost entirely.

Soon the use of written English was spreading rapidly, from guild masters to merchants to churchmen, many of whom must have been wildly relieved to be able to conduct business in a version of their native language.

As English began to be used for increasingly important purposes, it became increasingly important to use a form of English that everyone could understand—and that everyone would respect.

The Rules of the Game

At first standards were largely—though not exclusively—determined by the language of the royal clerks. The rise of the printing press also played a key role in standardising language, particularly with regard to spelling. For instance, we have foreign compositors and typefaces to thank for the use of “gh” instead of “g” in certain words (such as “ghost”).

Soon enough, though, the subject of language standardisation was taken up by dictionary writers, grammarians, and even general linguistic busybodies.

The Influence of Scholars

It’s much more accurate to refer to what many think of as proper English with the term language scholars use: “Standard English.”

Many of the early English dictionaries and grammars ostensibly sought to describe prevailing usage—they were not meant to be prescriptive. But, of course, the selection of any one variety as a representative form is, in and of itself, a kind of prescription.

These early and influential dictionaries and grammars relied on a variety of criteria to determine their recommended words and rules. In his landmark, Dictionary of the English Language, Samuel Johnson—a man who famously remarked that “the chief glory of a nation arises from its authors”—leaned heavily on citations from widely respected authors, a trend that continues to this day.

Grammarians had their own guiding principles, often calling on logic (decrying double negatives and superlatives) or etymology (railing against the substitution of “nauseous” for “nauseated”).

Others rationales were more subjective. Some writers, for instance, believed that it was better to use one-syllable words whenever possible because they were closer to the language of Adam and Eve. And then there were those who felt so strongly about the linguistic virtues of Latin and Greek that they could come to believe, as John Dryden famously did, that a preposition at the end of a sentence is something to be strenuously avoided. (Read the article about ending a sentence with a preposition.)

No matter how persuasive the scholarship, the facts remain the same: the variety that would become Standard English was based on the varieties of the political, economic, and intellectual elite—not because they were necessarily better, but because they were the ones who got to decide.

The Authority of Salesmen

This is when things start to get a bit tricky.

The literary market in the 17th and 18th centuries was not so different from our own. There wasn’t much demand for linguistic observation—what readers wanted was linguistic guidance. And again and again, scholars and linguists from Johnson to Webster to Henry Higgins did their best to fill this need. Even Robert Cawdrey’s 1604 Table Alphabeticall, the earliest English dictionary, makes explicit on its title page that it has been “gathered for the benefit & helpe of Ladies, Gentlewomen, or any other unskilfull persons. Whereby they may the more easilie and better understand many hard English words.”

But as social mobility increased, the standards of the written language exerted more and more influence on the spoken language, which was looked to as a measure of refinement and “politeness.” Soon the demand for linguistic instruction outstripped the scholarly supply, and readers began to snap up handbooks and how-tos whose advice was justified not by years of study—or any study at all, for that matter—but rather by the ruthlessly efficient principle of “you should.”

Or, more accurately, “you shouldn’t.”

So it was that non-standard language became a nuisance to be dealt with (like troublesome household vermin, as in the 1878 volume Enquire Within upon Everything) or a bad habit to be frowned upon (like breathing through your mouth, as in 1888’s Don’t: A Little Book dealing Frankly with Mistakes & Improprieties more or less Common to All).

And when you teach that there is only one way to be right, it’s only natural to conclude that every other way is wrong.

The Slippery Slope

As long as we’ve had language varieties, we’ve also had stereotypes about the people who speak those varieties. But the implementation of the standard form of a language—couched as it so often is in terms of elegance, propriety, and correctness—can take an otherwise unassuming us/them split and institutionally marry it to a set of pernicious value judgments: what is “right,” what is “educated,” what is “civilized,” what is “good.”

Linguists and philosophers, and just about anyone who has ever stopped to think about it, have been doing battle with perceptions like these for centuries—just as they have been doing battle with similarly ingrained stereotypes relating to race, ethnicity, class, and gender. And they’re having about as much luck with the former as they are with the latter. Today conspicuously non-standard varieties of English—particularly those spoken in the South and by African-Americans—are still routinely characterised as “defective,” “lazy,” and flat-out “wrong.”

But the truth is this: Every variety of English is equally regularised and expressive—just as every language is equally expressive. They all have their own internal rules and grammar. Despite what the usage mavens of yesteryear might have us believe, proficiency with Standard English has nothing to do with innate linguistic superiority, or cognitive or moral superiority. Though the language we use in any given situation is surely a product of external circumstances, it is in no way a function of internal worth.

That doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t learn Standard English—quite the contrary, given the importance placed upon its usage, it would be irresponsible to suggest otherwise.

But surely there’s room for one more standardisation: That we all agree to do away with the idea that there’s a single, objectively superior form we call “proper” English. It’s much more accurate to refer to what many think of as proper English with the term language scholars use: “Standard English.”

So, guys, I hope you found this piece of script informative. I know I did.

Till we speak again...cheers!!!

-S

THE HELP “Change begins with a whisper" Review by Emma Davis

2012-04-24T14:34:00.000+02:00

Hey friends,

A bestie of mine took the liberty of writing you guys a movie review. Now, after reading this I definitely wanna watch this movie. Enjoy!!

“It took me far too long to watch “The Help”...I’ve been saying I’ll watch it for ages but never got around to it and throughout the Awards season with 39 wins & 54 nominations, I just knew I had to watch this one. For those who haven’t seen it yet, you have to and if you don’t have a movie buddy then I will offer my company because it certainly is not a movie I will only watch once. A bit of background to start, the film (based on the novel by Kathryn Stockett) follows an aspiring author, Skeeter Phelan, played by Emma Stone, who, during the 1960s, decides to write a tell-all book detailing the African-American maids' point of view on the white families for which they work, and the struggles they go through on a daily basis. Skeeter discovers, to put it bluntly, all the shit that these maids have to put up with and in turn helps “the help” have a voice.

Now I’m not going to babble on too much about the actual story line because I will bore those that have watched it or ruin it for those who haven’t. Instead I’ll just rave on about some other stuff. Firstly, the cast is phenomenal and each character plays their role to the “T”. I love Emma Stone and even though she plays Skeeter superbly and is an absolute force to be reckoned with in Hollywood at the young age of 22, it is Viola Davis (Aibileen Clark) and Octavia Spencer (Minny Jackson) who steal the show! The sassy, driven Minny and the emotionally wounded, caring Aibileen draw you into the life of an ill-treated maid in the 60s. Jessica Chastain trades in her ginger locks for a bottle blonde do to play the role of Celia Foot, the ditsy, kind-hearted country girl who blurs the lines society has set. Her character, my favourite in the film, is so loveable and fun yet at the same time evokes a sense of pathos as she tries her utmost to fit in while struggling with personal issues, all the while, bucking the system and forming a friendship with her “help”.

I love watching movies (who doesn’t?!) but if a movie doesn’t grip my attention the whole way through then my eye constantly checks out the clock but with “The Help” I didn’t once think it was dragging. I was gripped for all 146 minutes of it. In that time, all emotions are visited, from shame to pride, sympathy and sadness to anger and joy and most certainly a few tears were shed and giggles were had.

As you will learn with my movie reviews to follow (let’s hope), I love quotes and will throw them in as much as I can. There will always be AT LEAST one quote that will stand out for me in a movie and I’m going to leave you with this one from “The Help”, said by Aibileen every morning to the little girl, Mae Mobley, “You is kind. You is smart. You is important.”…remember that and WATCH THE MOVIE! Utter brilliance!"

And there you have it guys, that’s Emma Davis for you, movie critic & social media expert. Follow her on the Twitter account @justlunchsa to read more of her awesome work. Now, I have the privilege of working alongside her as well as another brilliant soul, Don Dinnematin, on Just Lunch. Catch the madness on http://www.wix.com/justlunchsa/just-lunch

Keep following me and you will see a lot more from this awesome writer:)

-Sam

Book review: Tess of the D'Urbervilles

2012-04-23T13:46:00.000+02:00

Tess Durbeyfield is a young and naïve country girl, who is also the eldest daughter in a large, poverty-stricken family, living in the small village of Marlott. Her father, John Durbeyfield, who is prone to drinking and putting off work, discovers, by chance, that he is a descendant of the ancient but extinct royal lineage of the D'Urbervilles. Her mother, Joan, discovers that a wealthy family of the same name lives in a nearby town and, after an unfortunate accident in which the Durbeyfields’ only horse is killed, she sends Tess to Tantridge mansion to go "claim kin".

Because Tess was the cause the death of her family's horse, she feels obligated to earn money to buy a new one...unaware that the current family of D'Urbervilles are imposters; she sets off on her journey. When her family fall on hard times she is sent to the D'Urbervilles, rich landowners who are mistakenly assumed to be relations. Tess meets Alec D'Urberville (who allows Tess to claim kinship, but is a relative in name only). He takes a liking to the young and impressionable Tess and relentlessly pursues her. Eventually, he leads her into the Chase & commits the most heinous crime – rape. Tess returns home distressed and bares a child, which dies after a week. Torn by shame and regret, Tess decides to go to work away from home, on a dairy farm, where she meets Angel Clare, a beautiful man who loves her deeply. However, when he proposes to her, she is torn between lying to him by omission versus telling him of her past with Alec -- a choice that would likely alienate him in terms of the strict morals of Victorian Britain. Finally, she succumbs to Angel's pleas for marriage. On their wedding night, Tess reveals her secret and everything that had happened to her before meeting him.

In a rage, he heartlessly leaves her to earn a living, alone, in Brazil with a promise of maybe returning someday. Tess's life gets even worse after this. She is forced to find work labouring on farms, her only hope that one day her beloved Angel will return.

A chance meeting with the reformed Alec dashes these hopes as his old obsession returns and he beguiles Tess with promises to help her and her family in place of her long absent husband.

Her family suffer further losses and, abandoned as she is, Tess is obliged to turn once again to Alec D'Urberville for help. When Angel returns to find her living as Alec's mistress, she takes desperate actions in a tragic effort to free herself.

***

This was a very controversial book at the time of writing as it is sympathetic to a “fallen woman”. Tess is one of the most tragic heroines in English literature and Hardy shows her as a victim of circumstance caught up in a moral dilemma. Hardy takes us into nineteenth century rural Wessex and describes his characters, the countryside and the way of life so well, that we think we are there."

-Sam

Senseless rambling bitch, on Facebook

2012-04-11T15:22:00.000+02:00

I saw a comment on Facebook, the morning of a very important Hindu celebration (Hanuman Jayanti), 6 April 2012. Now it pains me to see how people with such little brain power actually make it through the day...let alone life.

I’m going to paraphrase...”What did Hanuman do that he is sharing the day with Jesus Christ? Was he nailed to the cross? Did he die for people?....Who the hell is he...?”

I WILL NOT justify this, nor will I retaliate in throwing insults back as it is not the way I was raised. I was taught that just because someone is different does not mean that you should criticise or distance yourself from them. If anything, embrace the change...coz there is a lot you can learn from someone who isn’t like you.

The way I see it, a decent self-respecting people are brought up to respect other people’s cultures, religions and ways of life. Even if you don’t understand it – you are taught that by respecting the traditions or social behaviour of other people, it’ll promote tolerance and the world will be a better place. Somewhat at least!! Well, it is NOT working people. Coz the last time I checked, despite huge aspects like globalisation, abolishing of the apartheid system, and the inevitable increase in us being a multicultural society, the world is still a pretty awful place. (This is in reference to the monkey who was dense enough to write about something she has no fucking clue about.)

I mean, I consider myself very knowledgably when it comes to other religions and customs, but I will admit that because religion is so vast, you will never ever really “know it all”. Still, I respect everyone’s chosen way of life, or...I shut up if I have nothing nice to say. Not only is it tactless to belittle someone or something you have no knowledge on – but you are also contravening the Constitution, you moron.

Maybe there just aren’t enough people who have decent upbringings out there. Or maybe people simply lack the imagination to truly allow themselves to understand and respect another person. Or, most likely, the some people are just bigoted assholes.

I will not step down to your level, girl, and pick on Christianity or anything for that matter, because unlike you, I am not an idiot. And anyone with half a brain knows that in Hinduism, dates change constantly, and an auspicious date is recalculated every year according to calendars (which have a different number of days in the month as opposed to the western calendar) as well in accordance with the alignment of the moon and other sightings as well. This is not a lesson & and I am not your fucking teacher – you should have done your homework, instead of now appearing intellectually challenged.

So, stop being ignorant, you goat!!

-S

Petrol price increases: Consumers can’t take anymore!!

2012-04-05T16:22:00.000+02:00

As many of you with a pulse are aware – petrol is speedily approaching R12 a litre. What’s worse is that Economists are already predicting the next fuel increase. The rocketing fuel price is wreaking havoc across the country, maiming businesses and pushing many households into financial misery.

Minister of Energy Dipuo Peters during a Pretoria press briefing on the rising fuel prices.

With fuel prices rocketing to the highest level yet, the Department of Energy has acknowledged that the adjustment will have a negative effect on most South Africans but claims that it was out of their hands.

What does this mean for consumers?

Well I for one, I’m going to need to hike to work and if that reaches FAIL status, I will have to resort to crawling. For many consumers there will not be much light at the end of the tunnel with the substantial increases. So many families are battling to make ends meet and, as a result of these hefty price hikes, will have to face the ripple effect on consumer goods in months to come. The South African consumer has nowhere to hide, they have no recourse. They are looking at a bumpy 2012 ahead, with the cost of living soaring out of reach.

What is the solution?

Remember the days when putting R100 worth or fuel into your tank either filled it or lasted a good week? With the rising fuel prices it seems impossible that there is anything we can do to save petrol. The average South African spends between R1000 and R1800 per month on petrol and with the rising prices this makes a considerable dent in one’s budget. However, there are ways you can lower your consumption.

· Press down gently when accelerating. Imagine there is an egg between your foot and the accelerator and press the pedal accordingly. As much fun as going from 0-100km per hour in less than 10 seconds is, it a lot of fuel and you certainly won’t save petrol driving like this.

· If the traffic light is red start slowing down early instead of racing up to it and slamming on your brakes. While the question “does coasting save petrol” gets asked a lot, this is one instance where leaving it in gear and easing up to the light definitely does. And this means that you won’t need to get your brakes changed too often either.

· Ensure that you are in the correct gear for the speed that you are doing. Driving at high speeds in low gears is not going to save petrol; in fact it uses up to 45% more fuel than is actually required.

· Ensure that your tyres are properly inflated. As they lose air the car becomes more difficult to move which means that more petrol is used.

· Use the air-conditioner sparingly and you will see a decrease of up to 20% in consumption, which means that ultimately you will save money on petrol.

· If you can afford it, buy a more economical car such as one with a diesel or hybrid engine as these are known to save or at least use less petrol.

By making simple changes to your driving style and habits you can do a lot to save petrol and cope with the rising fuel price increases.

I hope this is useful guys.

-S

Drink responsibly this Easter

2012-04-05T15:00:00.000+02:00

O-k, you alcoholics, the Easter weekend is coming up...

Have fun this holiday - but if you drink, do it responsibly. Here’s some advice – take it, dammit!!

As you head toward your holiday destinations, here are some useful tips to ensure that you keep safe while still having fun over this period:

Appoint a designated driver

When planning a night out, agree upfront with a friend who will be the designated driver. You don’t wanna hit a bump and spill some... (*bad joke*)... This person must refrain from drinking at all during the evening.

Eat while you drink

Always eat before drinking alcohol and try to eat while drinking. It is particularly good to eat high protein and fatty foods such as cheese and peanuts or a burger and chips, which help to slow the absorption of alcohol into the circulatory system. Also drink plenty of water before, during and after drinking alcohol to ensure you keep hydrated. If you can remember!!!

Sip your drink slowly

If you gulp a drink for the effect, you are losing the pleasure of the experience and this will result in you getting intoxicated at a much fast rate. Pretend you are snails, you greedy swines.

Don’t accept open drinks from strangers

At a party, do not accept already opened drinks from strangers...no matter how tempting the offer...

Space your drinks

When at a party, have a nonalcoholic drink between the alcoholic one to keep your blood alcohol concentration down. Space your alcoholic drinks out to keep the desired blood alcohol concentration. (*Eye roll*)

Use alcohol carefully if you're taking medication

This includes over-the-counter drugs such as sleeping pills and cold or cough medicines. Alcohol should be avoided while taking antibiotics or prescription medication.

Don’t supply drinks to underage persons

The South African legal drinking age is 18. (*Bwa ha ha*)

-S

Alcoholics Anonymous

13 magical uses for cucumbers

2012-04-05T14:06:00.000+02:00

Hello people,

I found this amazing article & had to share:

The humble cucumber is actually a little gem. And not just for its nutritional benefits...

1. Cucumbers contain most of the vitamins you need every day

Just one cucumber contains Vitamin B1, Vitamin B2, Vitamin B3, Vitamin B5, Vitamin B6, Folic Acid, Vitamin C, Calcium, Iron, Magnesium, Phosphorus, Potassium and Zinc.

2. Feeling tired in the afternoon? Put down the caffeinated soda and pick up a cucumber

Cucumbers are a good source of B vitamins and carbohydrates that can provide that quick pick-me-up that can last for hours.

3. Tired of your bathroom mirror fogging up after a shower?

Try rubbing a cucumber slice along the mirror: it will eliminate the fog and provide a soothing, spa-like fragrance.

4. Are grubs and slugs ruining your planting beds?

Place a few slices in a small pie tin and your garden will be free of pests all season long. The chemicals in the cucumber react with the aluminum to give off a scent undetectable to humans but drive garden pests crazy and make them flee the area.

5. Looking for a fast and easy way to remove cellulite before going out or to the pool?

Try rubbing a slice or two of cucumbers along your problem area for a few minutes. The phytochemicals in the cucumber cause the collagen in your skin to tighten, firming up the outer layer and reducing the visibility of cellulite. Works great on wrinkles too!

6. Want to avoid a hangover or terrible headache?

Eat a few cucumber slices before going to bed and wake up refreshed and headache free. Cucumbers contain enough sugar, B vitamins and electrolytes to replenish essential nutrients the body has lost, keeping everything in equilibrium, and avoiding both a hangover and headache!

7. Looking to fight off that afternoon or evening snacking binge?

Cucumbers have been used for centuries and often by European trappers, traders and explorers for quick meals to thwart off starvation.

8. Have an important meeting or job interview and you realize that you don't have enough time to polish your shoes?

Rub a freshly cut cucumber over the shoe. Its chemicals will provide a quick and durable shine that not only looks great but also repels water.

9. Need to fix a squeaky hinge?

Take a cucumber slice and rub it along the problematic hinge, and voila, the squeak is gone!

10. Stressed out and don't have time for a massage, facial or visit to the spa?

Cut up an entire cucumber and place it in a boiling pot of water. The chemicals and nutrients from the cucumber with react with the boiling water and be released in the steam, creating a soothing, relaxing aroma that has been shown the reduce stress in new mothers and college students during final exams.

11. Just finished a business lunch and realize you don't have gum or mints?

Take a slice of cucumber and press it to the roof of your mouth with your tongue for 30 seconds to eliminate bad breath. The phytochemcials will kill the bacteria in your mouth responsible for causing bad breath.

12. Looking for a 'green' way to clean your taps, sinks or stainless steel?

Take a slice of cucumber and rub it on the surface you want to clean; not only will it remove years of tarnish and bring back the shine, but it won't leave streaks and won't harm you fingers or fingernails while you clean.

13. Using a pen and made a mistake?

Take the outside of the cucumber and slowly use it to erase the pen writing. Also works great on crayons and markers that the kids have used to decorate the walls!

-S

Taxi crushed between trucks in Durban

2012-04-05T09:28:00.000+02:00

Hi Bloggers,

I am sure a lot of you are aware of the accident that happened on the N2 North-bound yesterday. Sadly, I was stuck the traffic jam. Diverting to every alternate route saw no joy. For those of you who haven't as yet read up on it - here's a brief summary:

"Death and injury followed an accident on the N2 north-bound in Durban on Wednesday afternoon. The N2 was closed after a minibus taxi was wedged between two trucks. The taxi squeezed in between two trucks. One person died and 28 others were treated for injuries ranging from minor to serious. Four people still trapped in the taxi were in a critical condition. One patient was airlifted to a nearby hospital. The cause of the accident had not yet been established."

It’s the start of the Easter Weekend people, and many motorists will be on the road making their way to their holiday destinations all around South Africa. Before you start your journey with your family, take a few minutes to do a simple walk around inspection and then an engine inspection.

With the walk around inspection, you are checking the wiper blades, lights and the wheels.

• Wiper blades – you are looking to see if the material is soft and that it doesn’t have any cracks or it has separated from the holding. A good wiper blade will give you good visibility while you are driving through those potential down pours.
• Lights – you will check if the indicators, headlights and brake lights are working properly. It’s always a good idea to have the headlights checked for the correct alignment in order to have optimum lighting while driving on the roads and not blinding the driver on the oncoming lane.
• Tyres – check tyres for excessive or uneven wear and the tyre pressure is correct. Make sure that the tyres are road worthy and that you and your family will be safe.
The engine inspection is to check fluid levels, belts and pipes and battery connections.
• Fluid levels – make sure that you check the engine oil, brake fluid, radiator cooler and the windscreen washer fluid levels are all correct, if not make sure you top up to the correct levels and keep extra in the boot of your car in an emergency while travelling.
• Belts and Pipes – make sure all the belts are not cracking and tearing and that they are sitting correctly in the engine. Check the pipes for any leaks, if any loose clamps and that they are correctly fitted to the right areas.
• Battery Connections – make sure the battery terminals are clear of any corrosive build up. The terminals must be sitting correctly on the battery and that the battery is well mounted on to the car and will not move around while you drive.

Once you are on the road and making your way to your destination, take a few things into consideration while driving:

• Obey the road rules at all times
• Do not over load
• Have a good rest before embarking on your journey
• Take a break every 200km or every 2hrs
• Do not drink and drive
• Drive with your head light on – this will increase your visibility
• Always wear your seatbelt and check to see if everybody else in the car is wearing theirs.
• Be alert on weather conditions.
• Stay within the speed limits at all times, your destination is not going anywhere.
• Try and avoid driving after dark.
• Stay focused at all times, looking out for potentially dangerous drivers and pedestrians alongside the road. If possible avoid them at all times.
• If you are travelling with children, try and keep them entertained with different games and make sure that they are having fun while in the car with you,
• Make sure you let your loved ones know where you staying and that you got there safely.

To all holiday makers travelling on our road this Easter Weekend, may you have a safe and wonderful trip.

-S

Why do employers only think the sun shines outta your arse, when you have walked out the door...!!

2012-04-04T14:28:00.001+02:00

Hi guys,

One more, before I sign off for the day...

Tell me...do I live in a parallel universe or do some bosses just make you wanna turn around and whack them over the head, or better yet, on the arse with a cane...

Yes, you have guessed it...today Horrible Bosses have targets on their backs. (*Completely off the point – I thought that movie was awesome*)...

Moving on – well, a while back I used to work for this company, and I left. I left because my boss (well, it took over from my real boss) was an undeserving shrew who had more pride than common sense. Hence, "it" couldn’t actually see the joys of me working there...lol. Anyhoo... time went by, with each day seeming more wrist-slitting than the one before. Every time I'd hear that phony voice I would feel convulsions brewing the pits of my body. Yes, it happened. My boss would use any excuse to try to “expose” me...hahaha...yes, she appeared to be more of a drama queen than yours truly. But...no worries people, I always rise...coz mighty never fall...ya ha ha...

Let me describe it to you folks: Perfectly rounded, like a Pillsbury muffin, beady eyes that would scrutinise your every move, cynical remarks whenever you were happy about your accomplishments, always waiting to pounce - like the sly fox it was. Then, in addition to having to tolerate the demon, you also had to put up with its two-faced, back-stabbing minion. Aaah, the joys.

Ok, ok, I’m getting side-tracked; yet again...

A week ago, I get a call from the company, very subtly, querying a few processes with me. I assisted, hung up and went about my merry life. A day later, another call, then another in same day...after which, work was eventually offered to me on contract...I had gotten to the point of shouting out “crap” every time I'd recognise the caller ID. So, the last time a call came through from them, I bluntly pointed out how this was wasting my valuable time, and that I am no longer a part of that company. All this, only to be asked what kind of package I would settle on, to work for them again. Yes, you guessed right, I saw red. Bitches!! What the hell would possess you into thinking that I would work for you again? And, do you want to know what the worst part was – my ex-boss didn't call – a colleague did. For f-sake! Anyway, the light at the end of the tunnel my dear friends, is them realising my worth...oh, how I revelled in holding the trumph...at least until I slammed the phoned down on them...

So, tell me, do you have anyone like this in mind right now? I think, yes...

So, in keeping with the pig still having a twisted tail at the end of the day and all, I decided I could do better (which indeed turned out to be true)...and I left for greener pastures (damn, I sound cheesy).

And, here I find myself, after working for a decade...finally contentJ Doing what I love, and getting paid for it...life is sweet yo!!!

Until tomorrow, be good...at least one of us should... (**evil laugh**)

-S