Electronic Cerebrectomy

Kristen Bell Mondays

2013-05-20T08:38:00.001-05:00

Song of the Week: "Les langues de chat"

2013-05-19T09:49:00.002-05:00

A bit of cute silliness with Jane Birkin from 1972. Saw it on Tumblr and just couldn't resist it.

Sunday Hottie 433

2013-05-19T09:47:00.003-05:00

CAMERON DIAZ

Mary, Mary

2013-05-18T07:55:00.004-05:00

TV Report: Endings, Beginnings, Etc.

2013-05-17T14:49:00.001-05:00

I was going to write a post about the various season finales, but then the upfronts happened and I thought, hell, why not talk about season finales and the new shows at the same time in a loose confederation of nothing.

I'm looking at the lists of programs starting on the four major network and the CW this fall and, as usual, it's pretty hilarious stuff. The worst copywriters in the world are the ones who write the synopses for upcoming television shows. Always truly, truly so-bad-it's-funny. Also usually bad: the key art. Lots of white people standing around glowering, which generally makes shows look humorless and dull. Which is usually accurate.

Anyway, here are some thoughts on upcoming watchamahoozits.

ABC
ABC canceled Happy Endings, which I really dug, but they are bringing on Agents of SHIELD, which is really the one show I'm most looking forward to this fall. Because of course I am, come on.

I also want to catch Trophy Wife. The preview is cute and I really love Malin Akerman, so it'll be nice to see her on TV for as long as it lasts.

Nothing else really jumped out at me, but it's not like I'm short of shows to watch. ABC has Castle coming back, and Modern Family, Nashville and Shark Tank, so I'm happy with that, even without Happy Endings which, come on, we all knew had a limited shelf life.

I do have a question about Super Fun Night: where did Rebel Wilson come from? Nothing against her or anything, I'm just asking, when did this start? I feel like a year ago I'd never even heard of Rebel Wilson, and now suddenly everyone's a huge fan and she's in everything and she's everywhere. I don't have anything against her--hell, I've never even seen her in anything--but wow, from zero to ubiquitous.

I am still enjoying Modern Family but sort of in that way of just being a habit. Not that I don't genuinely enjoy it, but it isn't something that I look forward to each week. Nashville is, however. It's just so soapy and fun, and I adore Connie Britton on it. I loved her on Friday Night Lights, and I love her just as much here. Can't wait for next week's season finale, as I have my own suspicions about how the season might end. I will not be surprised if Scarlett and Avery get back together. At least it would save Avery from Juliette. I don't wish Juliette on anyone.

BTW, the funniest part of Modern Family these days? The commercials for Family Tools and How to Live with Your Parents (For the Rest of Your Life), "ABC's newest comedies," trying sadly to whip up enthusiasm for shows that have already been canceled. Hell, Family Tools star JK Simmons is on a new show already.

I caught a couple of episodes of The Middle in the last few weeks and enjoyed them.

Castle turned back into the show I used to love, and despite some dud episodes that really, really bugged me, it's such an improvement over season four (particularly the last third of it) that I can't really complain. It's still cute to me how every episode seems inspired by whatever movie some writer watched last week (like, say, Taken), and even if the last moments of the finale didn't really take me by surprise, it'll be interesting to see if they actually shake up the status quo at all next season. (Also: even the clip episode made it up to us by giving us the moment at the end where Captain Gates revealed she already knew about Castle and Beckett. I've been hoping for that. She is a cop for a living, guys.)

Is Scandal worth watching? I see the first season's on Netflix.

All I'll say about Revenge is that I'm hoping for a much better season next time.

CBS
Everything new coming on CBS looks bad. I was thinking for a second of giving Mom a try, but I think I've reached the end of my love for Anna Faris and the commercial I saw the other night was pretty lame. Chuck Lorre shows are usually just about characters existing and the fact that they do is apparently what makes them funny.

I see we're going back to the "oh, the poor oppressed white men who are so misunderstood, let us celebrate their privilege" well with We Are Men.

The new show that looks the funniest, though, is Intelligence, with Josh Holloway as a guy with a computer chip in his brain that connects him directly to the worldwide information grid. I envision lots of hilarious moments of Holloway standing and staring into the distance as the camera closes up on him and he thinks really hard. This sounds like it belongs in the same lineup as Manimal and Automan. I also think this is one of those occasions where someone has thought of a premise where a guy has powers that no one needs in their brain: The Amazing Human iPad.

With CBS I'll stick with 2 Broke Girls because Kat, The Big Bang Theory (I guess) and How I Met Your Mother, because I'm invested enough in these characters even if the upcoming final season--which will entirely take place at Barney and Robin's wedding--sounds like a huge, huge trial. This last season has already been a trial; often it's been downright insufferable, and I'm sick of Retconned Player All Along Ted and Throwing Out Years of Character Development to Make Me a Cartoon Barney and Barney Can Never Do Anything Manipulative and Sexist Enough for Me to Leave Him Robin. Seriously, guys, stop trying to turn Barney into Quagmire, it's gross. What a clusterfuck of annoyance this show has become. And none of it has anything to do with not meeting the mother, by the way. If you think that's what's wrong with it, I disagree. The problem has been a lack of consistency in characterization and a pacing that has only served to highlight how much this show's been spinning its wheels. Also, do I have any reason to think the mother is going to be any less boring and awful than Victoria, Stella or Zoe? (Also: totally called that the whole train station in the rain bit was going to be the actual end of the series. Now that we're getting 22 to 24 episodes at one wedding, I think I'll just call myself right.)

Shame about Vegas. I only stuck with that the first four or five weeks. Looks like more and more of America felt the same way.

NBC
I think Dracula looks truly ridiculous, but I'm much more annoyed by Crossbones, a show about the fascinating Golden Age of Piracy which cast freaking John Malkovich (??) as Blackbeard! God damn you, Crossbones.

I'll be watching Parks & Recreation, of course, and The Michael J. Fox Show. I've been hoping for Fox to come back to TV, especially after his great stint on Curb Your Enthusiasm a couple of years ago. I dig the guy; I've been watching him on TV since I was 6.

I'm of two minds on Hannibal. On the one hand, I'm really, REALLY liking this show and would like to see it keep going. On the other, I'm wondering if they can maintain the quality that's become the hallmark of the series. And how long can you keep it going until you get to Red Dragon, anyway? Still, if they wanted to spend a whole season doing Red Dragon, that might be kind of cool. You wouldn't have so much Hannibal, though. I think really what I'd love to see is just a satisfying conclusion to one great season of television and not try to drag it out.

None of the other cancellations were a surprise. Did you see 1600 Penn? Wow, that was terrible.

So glad Fred Armisen is finally leaving SNL. Sorry Bill Hader's going, though, since he's one of the people carrying it.

FOX
Everything coming on Fox looks lame. If it weren't for Bob's Burgers, I wouldn't watch Fox at all. (I only made it about three episodes into The Mindy Project.) I enjoyed the auditions for The X-Factor just because my Britney was all crazy, but that's about it. Fox is a waste, and I don't want to get involved in Fox programming because most of it will just get preempted for various sports, anyway. The only comment I have is that Almost Human sounds like a total ripoff of Isaac Asimov's The Caves of Steel.

THE CW
Boy, who really cares? Have you seen the clip going around from Reign? Cringe.

Otherwise: loved The Americans, loving Game of Thrones, and Veep.

Anyway, that's TV. New episodes of Dance Moms and Pretty Little Liars in June, and really I'm just waiting the long half-year for the next cycle of RuPaul's Drag Race to start, because what else is there, really?

80s Revisited: The Accused

2013-05-17T12:46:00.001-05:00

The Accused (1988)
Directed by Jonathan Kaplan; written by Tom Topor; produced by Stanley R. Jaffe & Sherry Lansing.

I've been thinking about this one for some time. I actually re-watched this a few months ago, but I really wasn't sure what to say about it. And I know a big part of the reason is just how awful this movie makes me feel. And, really, I'm not sure what to say about this movie other than it made me feel really awful.

This was one of the first mainstream Hollywood films to deal so directly with rape. It has a visceral, confrontational frankness to it that is important to getting its message across. And it has two great lead performances, Jodie Foster (who won an Oscar) as the victim who wants to tell her story, and Kelly McGillis (who was a real-life rape survivor) as the ADA who sues the rape witnesses for criminal solicitation (after agreeing to prosecute the original rapists for a lesser charge in order to cut a deal). What's very interesting about this movie is that approach: that instead of going after the rapists (because any mature human being shouldn't need 111 minutes to prove to an audience that rape is a horrible crime), it goes after the people who were complicit in the crime by cheering it on and/or doing nothing to stop it. I think Roger Ebert summed it up best in his review: "verbal sexual harassment, whether crudely in a saloon back room or subtly in an everyday situation, is a form of violence - one that leaves no visible marks but can make its victims feel unable to move freely and casually in society. It is a form of imprisonment."

I stand disappointed in my generation that this is still such a relevant message today.

It's an uncomfortable film, and honestly, it's not a great film, but it is a very necessary film. It's graphic and damn hard to watch, but I don't like what it would say about me if it weren't.

Film Week

2013-05-15T20:32:00.002-05:00

A review of the films I've seen this past week.

LOOPER (2012)
Potentially interesting concept totally wasted on a long, boring slog punctuated by occasional sci-fi action bullshit. I was with it for about the first half-hour, but instead of exploring the characters or the concept, the film gets caught up in its situation, and it's just... boring. It's a really, really boring film. It doesn't help that it saddles its lead, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, with having to maintain a caricatured impression of Bruce Willis through makeup that makes him look like a Dick Tracy villain--the effect is so distracting that it held the performance back. It's just all so unnecessary. The film has no faith in its concept and how it might affect the main character. How do you live knowing that eventually you'll have to kill yourself? Having killed your future self, how does that effect the next thirty years of your life, knowing you're moving ever closer to your predetermined death? Those are interesting existential questions the movie casts aside in favor of its less interesting gimmick, which isn't even based on interesting science. You're telling me they can't just incinerate a body in 2074? It doesn't make sense, but at least I had time to ponder it while the movie wasn't bothering to do anything interesting. It's a shallow movie that thinks it's deep. Like Inception. Is this modern science fiction filmmaking? *1/2

Happy Birthday, Audrie

2013-05-13T13:18:00.001-05:00

Today, my youngest sister Audrie is 18 years old.

I'm pretty confident that I haven't been a very good brother to her at all. I'm just not a very good family member, to be quite honest. I quietly keep to myself because of whatever issues I've had growing up, and it makes me seem selfish and standoffish. I'm reserved, and I have this thing where I just figure--in a default way, not in a self-pitying way--that people have preferred not to be around me. And my agoraphobia and panic disorders make it hard to be a part of what's going on.

But I do love my sister very much. I think about her every day and keep up with her Facebook, and she seems to be happy and loving life and having fun, which are three things I wasn't when I was her age. I'm very proud of her and I'm a little in awe that she's my sister. Very, very proud.

Happy Birthday, Audrie. It's an exciting month: prom, birthday, graduation. 18 years old, and I still remember very clearly holding her as a baby. Doesn't seem so long ago. How does it go by so fast?

Mother's Day (Peanuts Style)

2013-05-12T09:26:00.001-05:00

Bonus:

Song of the Week: "The Next Day"

2013-05-12T09:13:00.001-05:00

Just enjoying the steady stream of wonderfully odd videos from David Bowie's new album.

Sunday Hottie 432

2013-05-12T09:07:00.001-05:00

WINONA RYDER

My 100 Favorite Films of the 1960s: The Top 20

2013-05-10T08:05:00.002-05:00

The thrilling conclusion!

20. Yellow Submarine (1968)
One of my favorite animated films. I bet this must look great on Blu-Ray, because it looks amazing on my old DVD.

19. To Sir, with Love (1967)
I think Sidney Poitier should have won an Oscar for this film.

18. Jason and the Argonauts (1964)
One of my Dad's all time favorites, and one of mine. RIP Ray Harryhausen.

17. Rosemary's Baby (1968)
With this and Repulsion and The Tenant, you've got an interesting series of films about living in apartments. What happened to Polanski in an apartment?

16. To Kill a Mockingbird (1962)

15. A Funny Thing Happened On the Way to the Forum (1966)
One of my all time favorite comedies, a movie that makes me laugh constantly, but not Richard Lester's highest placed film on my list.

14. The Birds (1963)

13. Ersatz (1961)
Look for this short animation on YouTube, too, it's really worth it.

12. The Wild Bunch (1969)
The great Western film of the 1960s.

11. A Hard Day's Night (1964)
Richard Lester's highest placed film on my list. Breezy, full of personality, very funny, and it ends with a Beatles concert.

10. Contempt (1963)

9. The Leopard (1963)
Burt Lancaster's greatest performance, even if he is dubbed by an Italian actor.

8. The Pink Phink (1964)
The highest placed animation on my list is the first Pink Panther cartoon, but for some reason it always catches me off guard and makes me laugh and laugh. Beautifully animated in a minimalist style, too.

7. 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)
A transcendent film, even if only one other person I know in real life agrees with me. Sigh.

6. The Lion in Winter (1968)
Some of the most exciting acting I've ever seen in a film is Peter O'Toole and Katharine Hepburn trying to get at one another in this film.

5. Onibaba (1964)
Riveting and passionate.

4. One, Two, Three (1961)
Probably the most enjoyable comedy I know.

3. Blow-Up (1966)
Powerful.

2. West Side Story (1961)
My Dad really hates this movie. In fact, most people I know really, really do not like this movie.

1. Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
Well, since I often cite this as my second or third favorite film ever made, that can't be much of a surprise. I do dearly love this film, and now that I've got the music going through my head, I at least need to hear the score.

If you'll excuse me...

My 100 Favorite Films of the 1960s: 40-21

2013-05-09T07:16:00.000-05:00

40. Lilies of the Field (1963)

39. Planet of the Apes (1968)
This is one of those movies I always get caught up in and end up watching if I pass it on TV. Rod Serling's screenplay is basically a feature length Twilight Zone episode; a very compelling one.

38. In Cold Blood (1967)

37. Vixen (1968)
Erica Gavin recently said she liked my wife's art. She's Becca's favorite Russ Meyer star.

36. Belle de Jour (1967)
My favorite of my many favorite Bunuel films.

35. The Dot and the Line: A Romance in Lower Mathematics (1965)
Surprised it took this long to get to a short cartoon, but not surprised that the first one is by Chuck Jones.

34. The Producers (1968)

33. Repulsion (1965)
Claustrophobic and impossible to look away from.

32. Topkapi (1964)

31. The Innocents (1961)
One of the most creepily atmospheric movies I've ever seen.

30. Two Women (1961)

29. The Umbrellas of Cherbourg (1964)
That's three movies with Catherine Deneuve in this grouping.

28. Patton (1970)

27. The Critic (1963)
If you haven't seen Ernest Pintoff's abstract short animation with Mel Brooks as an obnoxious moviegoer, go find it on YouTube. It's just a few minutes long, but it's so worth it.

26. Ride the High Country (1962)
I'm kind of surprised there aren't more Westerns on this list.

25. Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970)

24. Night of the Living Dead (1968)

23. A Man for All Seasons (1966)
No one mentions Robert Shaw in this movie very much. It's his best performance in anything, in my opinion. Not that I hear people mentioning this movie ever, which is a shame, because it's a great one.

22. M*A*S*H (1970)
I've lived pieces of my life by a philosophy of goofing off. This movie fed that. And the novel, for that matter.

21. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly (1967)
The first movie anyone used to teach me about composition and cinematography, in my high school film studies class.

Tomorrow: the top 20.

New Banner for Summer 2013, and Yes, It's Obviously Kristen Bell

2013-05-08T15:15:00.003-05:00

My 100 Favorite Films of the 1960s: 60-41

2013-05-08T14:56:00.002-05:00

I think literally one person is interested in this, but as long as she is, I'll just keep doing it.

60. Billy Budd (1962)

59. The Exterminating Angel (1962)
Silvia Pinal and Luis Bunuel...

58. 8 1/2 (1963)

57. Viridiana (1961)
...and Silvia Pinal and Luis Bunuel again.

56. Yojimbo (1961)

55. The Misfits (1961)
I do love these fatalistic movies about the ends of American eras which are really about the ends of eras in American filmmaking. These really feels like it shuts the door on 1950s filmmaking.

54. My Life to Live (1962)

53. Dr. Strangelove, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1962)
How I learned to start worrying about American movies a little bit because hardly anyone seems to find this movie funny anymore.

52. Easy Rider (1969)

51. Age of Consent (1969)
I pretty much just want to be James Mason in this movie for the rest of my life, remote island and teenage girlfriend and all. I should've stuck with painting.

50. Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? (1966)

49. The Bride Wore Black (1968)
I love Truffaut's attempt at Hitchcock.

48. Juliet of the Spirits (1965)
Another real beauty of production design and cinematography.

47. Bonnie and Clyde (1967)

46. Band of Outsiders (1964)

45. Time Piece (1966)
Jim Henson's excellent short film which is sadly not on YouTube in full anymore.

44. Even Dwarfs Started Small (1970)
Werner Herzog's second film, about mental patients at an asylum who take over--with an all little person cast--is deliriously, disturbingly insane. I've never been able to forget it. This will haunt you, but it's so worth it.

43. Lorna (1964)
Lorna Maitland in this film is my favorite of Russ Meyer's stars. Much more disturbing than sexy, but very good.

42. Simon of the Desert (1965)
Silvia Pinal, Luis Bunuel, I believe you've met...

41. Cleo from 5 to 7 (1962)
Lots of French films in this installment. And Spanish and German and Italian... European cinema was really where it was at this decade.

Tomorrow: the second to last installment.

Film Week

2013-05-08T14:26:00.001-05:00

A review of the films I've seen this past week.

A SECRET (2007)
Well-made French film about a son who uncovers his family's tragic pre-World War II past and how the dynamics of his family were altered forever. Excellent cast, touching, but not much to say about it. ***1/2

SEXUAL CHRONICLES OF A FRENCH FAMILY (2012)
After the youngest son of a well-off family is suspended for masturbating in class, the family matriarch (Valerie Maes, who is very good and very pragmatic in this film) realizes that she hasn't really talked about sex with her children, and the film sort of... well, just watches them have sex. That's pretty much it. We just look at what their sex lives are like, they have conversations about it, and there is literally no tension in the film at all. But I did find it sort of refreshing and nice that the film thinks of sex as neither shameful nor sensational. It's just a nice movie with lots of explicit sex scenes and regular conversation. Not remarkable, but grounded and enjoyable somehow. ***

I CONFESS (1953)
I always want to love every Hitchcock film, but I found this one about a priest who is accused of murdering a local businessman (he didn't, but he's holding on to a secret revealed to him in the confession booth) rather tedious. Montgomery Clift is pretty good in the lead, but not good enough to elevate the film from mostly a morality potboiler. **1/2

PUMPKINHEAD (1988)
Lance Henriksen unleashes a monster to get revenge on a bunch of 80s movie teenagers. It does. And that's pretty much it. Stan Winston seems to have thought of and designed a neat monster and then just given it a film to star in without giving much thought to whether it was a story worth telling. Neat monster, though, but what a boring movie. 80's horror also-ran. *1/2

IRON MAN 3 (2013)
I liked this one a lot more than I liked the disappointing Iron Man 2. Great twists, which you've doubtless already read about, but I think they really worked. I was very interested in what they've done with Tony Stark as a character, giving him a sort of PTSD after the events of The Avengers. I know there was a lot of talk among fans when the whole Marvel Cinematic Universe starting coming together about how to blend magical characters with the harder science fiction elements of the Iron Man movies, and I like how here we see that Tony's experience with aliens and a level of technology he can't easily understand has really shaken him. I looked at a lot of this through the prism of my own current problems with agoraphobia and panic disorder. I dug it. ***1/2 After this, I think I'm pretty much done speculating on what's going to happen in these movies; I'm firmly along for the ride and if they want to mess with the characters or do whatever, I don't really care as long as it's in an interesting/entertaining way.

Ray Harryhausen 1920-2013

2013-05-07T16:50:00.001-05:00

I came home from the movies this afternoon to discover that one of my movie heroes, Ray Harryhausen, died today. People are putting up much better tributes than I ever could, so let me just say thank you for The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad, The Golden Voyage of Sinbad, Jason and the Argonauts and Clash of the Titans, four of my all-time favorite movies and some of the most enjoyable cinema I've ever experienced. Thank you for all of it, from a creature lover to a creature maker.

My 100 Favorite Films of the 1960s: 80-61

2013-05-07T16:37:00.002-05:00

Continuing on from yesterday.

80. Romeo and Juliet (1968)
AKA the one with the boobs that they show 10th graders. That was always a big deal in high school, that you sat in class and saw the boobs in Romeo and Juliet. Oy. This is a great film, though. One of the best Shakespeare adaptations, and of a play I don't much care for.

79. Once Upon a Time in the West (1968)

78. Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! (1965)

77. Diary of a Chambermaid (1964)
Jeanne Moreau's best performance, I think, but there's another of her films coming on this list.

76. Divorce, Italian Style (1961)
Lots of foreign films on this list. I think American films were really getting kind of stale in this decade, until they got revitalized at the end of it. When I think of the 60s in American film I tend to think of bloated, overlong musicals. (Kind of like what we have right now, come to think...)

75. Kwaidan (1964)
A film of amazing, haunting imagery.

74. Lonely Are the Brave (1962)

73. Fists in the Pocket (1965)
One of the most compelling depictions of mental and emotional dysfunction I've ever seen.

72. Help! (1965)
It's just never not funny.

71. Loves of a Blonde (1965)

70. From Russia with Love (1963)
My favorite Bond flick.

69. The Manchurian Candidate (1962)

68. Judgment at Nuremberg (1961)

67. The Comedy of Terrors (1964)
I want Vincent Price complaining "You're sittin' on my money!" to be my ring tone.

66. Playtime (1967)

65. The Night of the Iguana (1964)

64. The Jungle Book (1967)

63. Bedazzled (1967)

62. The Masque of the Red Death (1964)
My favorite of the Roger Corman/Vincent Price AIP horror films, and this one Hazel Court, Jane Asher, and some beautiful production design.

61. Hell in the Pacific (1968)

Not much commentary today, but I had a bad night, give me a break. Tomorrow: the next 20.

Random Thoughts

2013-05-07T09:16:00.000-05:00

:: So, if Belloq was going to take the Ark of the Covenant back to Berlin (in 1936) and Hitler was going to open it right in the heart of Nazi Central, but Indiana Jones trying to steal it made Belloq decide to open it on a remote island instead, does that make Indiana Jones indirectly responsible for World War II and the Holocaust?

:: So, Jay-Z is producing this update of Annie, and I saw a bunch of articles making fun of the fact that they're renaming Daddy Warbucks, calling him Benjamin Stacks. The character is now a Diddy type of hip hop mogul or whatever weird term they're using now. I just thought it was weird to see people slagging off what I thought was actually a clever decision, and I usually don't think modernizing things is that clever. I mean, you guys are telling me that calling a rich guy "Benjamin Stacks" as in a stack of hundred dollar bills is somehow inherently sillier than calling a rich guy who made his money in defense contracts "Oliver Warbucks"? It's kind of exactly the same thing. Whatever, people love to complain, I just thought it was clever.

:: Because I didn't have a low opinion of Anne Rice already?

: I'm having unjustified backlash feelings about nerd stuff these days. I think it's just because I see so much stuff on Tumblr and other websites where feelings about genre television, movies, etc, keep getting turned into a weird kind of conformed groupthink. I don't know if anyone else feels this way. It's just rubbing me the wrong way a little bit, because I still remember how different it was when I was a kid, back when being yourself meant taking a lot of shit if you were a nerd. I can't believe we still have to put up with the stereotyped shit of the "Game of Game of Thrones" sketch on this weekend's Saturday Night Live where everyone who's into something geeky is supposedly a creepy loser shut-in, and yet our stuff is the stuff everyone's talking about. Gee, maybe we're not a stereotype after all.

And yet, we have these people who want to wear it like it's some kind of badge of honor to be "different," but they all are starting to think exactly the same way, which kind of sucks when you feel like the only guy in the room who doesn't like Firefly. So much of it is people patting themselves on the back for "daring" to be different. Yeah, it takes real courage to be "different" when the biggest movies in the world have been superhero movies for years now.

I really want to like this movie, but that cheesy narration isn't doing the visuals any favors. I also keep hearing there may be human characters in this, which would kill my interest. Is it really too much to ask that someone do a film about dinosaurs with no human presence? You really don't need to hold my hand. Where's that Raptor Red movie I've been waiting for for 15 years?

:: Now there's a lawsuit against the makers of the Aliens: Colonial Marines video game. I'd heard it was a real disappointment; apparently someone's suing on the grounds that the demos were so different that it constitutes false advertising. Do we really live in a world now where people will file lawsuits over disappointment with a video game? I guess we do, because this isn't the first time it's happened in the last couple of years. That says to me that video games are just way too expensive. Because as much as I have the instinct to be the guy who says "Well, that's a frivolous way to deal with disappointment," if I dropped sixty or eighty bucks on a video game and it was incredibly unsatisfying, I'd be pretty pissed off, too.

:: You know, after hearing it 20 or 30 times, I'm not buying this story that Bill Murray did Garfield because he thought writer Joel Cohen was actually Joel Coen. Come on, Bill. Really? You're telling me you didn't even read it until you sat down in the booth to record it? I'd be willing to believe it if you hadn't done a second one. You know, it doesn't make you any less cool if you just admit you did it for the money. It's really okay. Stop telling this desperate, unbelievable story and just say "Eh, did it for the money." We're all okay with that. Sometimes you have to do things for money. Big fat hairy deal.

My 100 Favorite Films of the 1960s: 100-81

2013-05-06T13:00:00.000-05:00

As threatened/promised a couple of weeks ago, here's another sixties list. I'll just assume you remember how I play and skip the ado and go right into the subjective, totally non-prestigious list of favorites. Also, there will be short films and cartoons on here because it's my list.

100. Hamlet (1969)
This list begins and ends with Marianne Faithfull.

99. Baron Prasil (1962)

98. The Vampire Lovers (1970)

97. On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)
One of my favorite Bond flicks, mainly because of Diana Rigg. Not to sell the film short on it's own, though.

96. Mothra vs. Godzilla (1964)
My favorite Godzilla flick. Son of Godzilla came really close, though.

95. Take the Money and Run (1969)
Oddly enough, this is still the only Woody Allen film I own on DVD. It's not my favorite of his (though I love it), it's just the one I actually have.

94. Rasputin, the Mad Monk (1966)
A historical story played as a lurid horror film, with one of my favorite Christopher Lee performances ever.

93. Lord of the Flies (1962)

92. The Fearless Vampire Killers (1967)

91. The Taming of the Shrew (1967)
Two Shakespeare adaptations already on this list.

90. The Great Escape (1963)

89. Seven Days in May (1964)
Rod Serling wrote the adapted screenplay for this taut political thriller. Scared the hell out of me when I saw this as an idealistic liberal high school student.

88. Goldfinger (1964)

87. Tokyo Drifter (1966)
If you really care about great cinematography and you haven't seen this movie, fix that.

86. A Midsummer Night's Dream (1968)
Third Shakespeare adaptation on the list, second film featuring Diana Rigg. One of my favorite Ian Holm performances ever.

85. The Naked Kiss (1964)
I wish Sam Fuller films were easier to get my hands on.

84. Cleopatra (1963)
Well, I've always liked it, derided as it is.

83. In the Heat of the Night (1967)

82. Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow (1963)

81. The Girl on a Motorcycle (1968)
From Marianne to Marianne.

Tomorrow: 80-61, but no Marianne.

Totally Rooting for Jinkx Tonight on the Drag Race Finale

2013-05-06T12:22:00.001-05:00

Bless this film. After a few episodes, I actually told Becca I thought it would be wonderful to make a film like this with Jinkx, and I'm very happy someone did.

Song of the Week: "You're So Good to Me"

2013-05-05T08:14:00.002-05:00

It's too nice out today to not have some Beach Boys. 1965, from Summer Days (And Summer Nights!!). It was also the B-side to "Sloop John B."

Sunday Hottie 431

2013-05-05T08:04:00.001-05:00

NOOMI RAPACE

Kermit & Steve

2013-05-04T11:47:00.003-05:00

20 Film Stars

2013-05-04T09:21:00.004-05:00

I came across a list titled "20 Film Stars You Definitely Won't Remember in 20 Years," and since I didn't do a list here like I originally planned this week, I thought I'd comment on this one. I'm always intrigued by lists that use words like "definitely" or "obviously" or "you probably believe" or "you never knew" or especially lists of movies "you've never seen," because I find those qualifiers a tad insulting and needlessly aggressive. So here's a little commentary on the people I "definitely" won't remember in 2033.

20. Taylor Kitsch
I'll always remember Taylor Kitsch because I absolutely loved John Carter and Friday Night Lights. Now, it might be framed as "Boy, whatever happened to Taylor Kitsch, remember that summer Hollywood insisted he was a movie star and America said no?" But I'll always remember him.

19. Brendan Fraser
Not if my wife has anything to say about it. Actually, Fraser's starred in a number of movies I just outright love, including one of the films cited in this entry as terrible, Looney Tunes: Back in Action. He's pretty much fading into obscurity already, and his movie career seems pretty much over, but I have a lot of flicks to remember him by.

18. Ron Perlman
Bullshit. There's always going to be work for a guy like Ron Perlman. He may not be a leading man, but he's a go to creature actor and a fantastic character actor. Shit, the oldest movie I've seen him in is back 32 years now. The guy's no movie star, but he's going to take a while to forget.

17. Hayden Christensen
No one from any Star Wars movies will be totally forgotten. He may not have a career--hell, he barely has one now--but he won't be forgotten, even if in your heart of fanboy hearts you think the Prequels will somehow fade into obscurity. (They won't.)

16. Jason Statham
I don't have the energy to care about Statham, but I figure his career path will probably be like Chuck Norris': he makes risible films, stars on a long-running syndicated action series for rednecks, goes into infomercials, and then because someone on the internet remembers how "awesome" his movies were when they were six, he becomes a meme, and then we never get rid of the guy and no matter what kind of horrible shit he says on the internet, you can never talk reasonably about it because some fuckwit who thinks macros are replacements for wit wanders into the conversation to say "A watched pot instantly boils for Jason Statham!"

15. Kevin James
Dear god, I hope so.

14. Leslie Mann
That's a possibility, especially as Judd Apatow's films become more frustrating and polarizing. I think when his career fades out (and I think it will), she'll probably go with him, just because she's so identified with this sort of nasty side of his films. It's too bad, because I love her, but I think the characters she plays in her husband's movies can be so hard for men to take that no one wants to put her in other roles. Maybe she'll get an HBO series like Enlightened or something in a few years. But I think when she's gone, she's gone. Then again, if being in The Cable Guy didn't kill her off, who knows?

13. Sam Worthington
I don't even remember him now. And apparently I've seen him in a couple of very bad movies.

12. Luke Wilson
Why the hell did this even happen in the first place? Boring, boring, lifeless, dull, boring.

11. Tom Felton
Not as long as the Harry Potter movies live on, and considering how young its youngest fans are, that's going to be a long, long time. Again, like Hayden Christensen, he may not have much of a career going forward, but he won't be forgotten. (Aside: I do love the original author's assertion that Felton's role in Rise of the Planet of the Apes was "several years ago." Apparently 21 months is now "several years ago.")

10. Justin Bartha
Who even remembers him now?

9. Danny McBride
I love Danny McBride. Love him.

8. Anna Faris
That seems to be happening already. What happened with her? I loved her.

7. Megan Fox
Her career will be very hard to get back on track, but I think she'll be remembered a bit as one of our many momentary It Girls. I mean, the tabloids still talk about Shannon Elizabeth and Denise Richards. Not in a positive way, but that's still being remembered. And as much as I don't like Fox, I still defend her against the whole Michael Bay situation and I think she was good in Jennifer's Body.

6. Shia LaBeouf
I used to defend his talent, but it seems to have gone up his ass along with his ego. You have to be very stupid to have what he had and then just blow it. Seriously, look at Tom Cruise: he's dull and not very talented and is in this weird cycle where his movies always seem desperate to make you believe he's 32, but people work with him and his movies make a lot of money. Even with his weird cult, he's still a movie star. Everyone agrees he's weird and unlikable, but his movies still make money. I don't think anything short of being caught in bed with a dead child is going to derail that motherfucker. All LaBeouf had to do was be ungrateful and basically tell Spielberg to go fuck himself, and that was it. Game over. Once you've pissed of Spielberg, obscurity awaits. And since those Transformers movies are pretty ephemeral, I think the only way LaBeouf is going to be remembered in another decade is as the guy who helped make the fourth Indiana Jones movie so reviled among a lot of movie fans.

5. Zac Efron
My penis says otherwise.

4. Renee Zellweger
There was a time, about 15 years ago, when I would actually go to see a movie just because she was in it. I'd say that's not the case anymore, but when would I have had the opportunity? It's a shame about that. She was talented, she won an Oscar, and Bridget Jones's Diary is wonderful. She's such a non-presence now. I think the last movie I saw her in was Appaloosa, a movie I wanted to like but didn't.

3. Katherine Heigl
I think Heigl's problem--and she made the same mistake as LaBeouf of badmouthing where she came from--is that she's just not that interesting as an actor. She's not deeply talented. She's pretty, but bland. And she tried so hard to be a romantic comedy lead when the simple face was that she just wasn't funny. Or likable. I think it's pretty much over for her and she's already fading into obscurity. You can't even really count on her rabid defenders so much anymore.

2. Taylor Lautner
He'll always be the Shirtless One from the Twilight movies, but his career probably won't amount to much. There are too many women in the world who named their kid Bella to ever really forget Taylor Lautner.

1. Channing Tatum
Duller than ditch water but people seem to like him. Not my type of sexy. I like Zac Efron.