These are the discoveries of late...

And We Met - II

2015-04-07T11:49:00.003-07:00

The next 3 weeks on bed were no less than 3 months, time was passing so slowly and I wanted to get back, get back on the roads to find her again. All these days, I was not able to forget the face I had seen across the road, it was special, someone really special. Not that she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen, but there was something about the simple salwar kurta girl whose lengthy hair and shy looks took me into an another world. For now this world was resting with me on bed, and all I was hoping was not to get back and join office soon, but to find her sooner. Though it was surely an unlikely happening but when lady luck is riding your way, probably anything can happen.
It was another monday, a week after I was declared fit and good to go. And yes, it was the same stop again where i got down after work. For the past one week I had been looking around for her but the result was no good, so the hope had kind of dried out in me. I got down and started walking towards my house which was half a mile away. The slightly hot sun, had me looking down on the road and i was walking at full stretch in order to reach home soon but just then something happened. In my lost world, I had walked past someone brushing against the person's shoulder a little too hard and that someone, was someone.

"Hey, Can't you walk properly !!", she exclaimed.
I turned around casually thinking I will apologize and start again but when i saw her, i literally hit the freeze.
"Aaaam sorry !!", this was probably the longest sorry I had ever told someone.
"Hey, how are you ? Aren't you the one who got hit by the car few days back", she said, drooling her eyes like a kid.
Now this was embarrassing and pleasing both at the same time, it was embarrassing that I had come across to her as someone who got hit on the road, while pleasing coz I got noticed.
"Yes, I am the same guy. And I am fine", I said in a little hard tone.
"Aww, someone got the pinch", she said.
"Anyways, chalo take care, walk carefully and cross even more.....", she announced and left.
We guys have a problem, when we are among our guy friends, we do not care we are laughed upon for whatever reason, but once a girl comes in and makes us a laughing stock, it gets a bit on the ego. I was being foolish, this was the same girl right behind me, playfully teasing me a little and here was my ego. Somehow, I got the right jingle and rushed to her.
"Hey, am sorry, got a little carried away. But I have a confession to make", I abruptly stopped saying this.
"Dude, its ok, no drama on the road please. Carry on", she seemed pissed off and walked away.
I had messed it up,this time in my senses, I saw her walk out on me. Anyways, this had a small good ending, she entered the gates of Prestige society which was quite near to my bus stop and hence, my house. With disappointment of being rude to a girl and little hope of meeting her again, I allowed hope to take its toll and hoped we would meet again.

Next few days were very uneasy, I had lost my focus, whole day I was stuck in that road moment. I had cut down on hanging out with my friends, half of the time I was sleeping and the other half in thinking whether I will be handed over an opportunity again which seemed unlikely, but yet again, like bollywood movies where there is no ending till the hero gets the girl, here was one more at the same bus stop of Bangalore.
It was an overcast morning with grey clouds hanging on top, I got up and left early for work but work did not come early this time. Felt as if it was a dream, I walked past her, she passed me and clouds from the blue heaven dropped heavy rain. It was out of nowhere, I looked back to find her standing under her blue umbrella. Looking at the sky she was, drooling her eyes from left to right like a kid watching a merry go round in circus. Of the many days that passed by, it was today that heaven had to rain. In this rain too, I was standing like an alien, while everyone was standing with their umbrellas above them, I was patched in my yellow raincoat which looked so flashy. I remembered how my father had narrated me happily the reason of buying it which was that it will stand out in the crowd. And here I was, in the crowd. I looked at her, she took a glance and then looked away. I kept looking still and then she did, once more. I waved my hand, she raised her eyebrows as if asking what. This was it, end of chapter. There was no hope here. I nodded my head saying nothing and turned the other side.
It took hardly a second after I turned the other side, that I got splashed by a car. It was probably going to be another embarrassing day I thought and found someone giggling all loud behind me.
Not surprised, it was her again, giggling like a small kid as if I was a clown, which unfortunately I was now, in a yellow raincoat, splashed by brown stripes randomly.

"What is so funny here?", I taunted.
"Don't you look beautiful today...ha ha ha !!", she said and started laughing loudly.
People around us observed her laugh and they too joined her.
"See you are making me feel embarrassed now", I quoted.
"Aww..yet again, right?", she commented.
The "Yet again" got me quiet about its mention from no where.
A Volvo arrived, almost everyone from our stop stalled themselves inside, two people remained on the stop, it was understandably me but her, I kept thinking why.
"Acha chalo, tell me what was it that you wanted to confess the other day ?", she jumped in again.
"Don't you have office today?", I asked her.
"I do, but I feel like knowing the answer first", she was buzzing.
In this period of chit chat, I had managed to get wet fully and plans of going to work seemed a long shot.
"It was nothing, you should leave", I replied.
"Okay, bye bye", and she walked towards the edge of the stop.
A Volvo came, chose not to stop and crossed in a rush spraying the lady some mud.

I could not stop laughing this time, louder than she had earlier, the girl was colored with mud and in that moment, had left the umbrella which flew away to the other corner of the street.
I walked up to her, we saw each other and shared the embarrassment together.
"Hi, I am Vikram. Its been a pleasure so far", I introduced myself.
"Anjali, not a great pleasure", she replied filling her cheeks with air, making her look like a child.
I glanced around, saw her umbrella lying on the other side. I took time for a change to cross the busy road, picked her and came back slowly. I had to keep in mind that I was holding the umbrella with a soft hand, probably it was of a girl I was standing next to, in a trivial but funny situation.
"Don't you plan to collide with another this time", she mocked me after I handed her thing.
"Coffee?", we jinxed.

PS : The Coffee was awesome, one of the best I ever had in my life, not because of the taste, but coz of my company - Anjali !!

And We Met !! (Fiction) - I

2015-03-12T12:05:00.000-07:00

Felt as if it was a dream, I walked past her, she passed me and clouds from the blue heaven dropped heavy rain. It was out of nowhere, I looked back to find her standing under her blue umbrella. Looking at the sky she was, drooling her eyes from left to right like a kid watching a merry go round in circus. Out of the hundred days passed, it was today that heaven had to rain. My ever fanatical mind, never held a stop to its wicked thinking. Funny how we guys think sometimes, we come across someone, or even just cross someone ( Of course, someone implies a girl :-P), stop for some unknown reason, and you look at the girl thinking, 'She's the one.'

This was how we met, and each day since then that we have spent together, laughing, talking, crying and fighting together in almost all type of situations, life has confirmed me, 'She's the one forever'.
Now before I take you through this journey, where each moment described will be like a fantasy, I want to clear it out its pure fiction, its only my wicked mind and Babbage's machine who are scripting this through. So, few highs and lows should be expected...

Vikram is my name, though at college I have had many, but I was born as Vikram. I grew up in India in a regular middle class family at Bangalore. As my parents had shifted from North India, they had a pretty compromising time in educating me and keeping up with the city standards, but they gave me everything I asked for. I grew up in the city, seeing people getting hungry for success. Probably my whole generation went on to develop the knack for it. Who would not have, we all were in a race which started at 23-24 after college and ended at 60 when one would retire. The Period in between was a tricky one, as the main highlights of one's life would take place in that.
I was a quiet one at school, probably the only reason of going school was to meet my friends who would talk of almost everything, and I would remain entangled in a different zone, but still it was a good time. I remember there was a time when it was so hard for me to pick whether I wanted to go for Maths (i.e. Engg) or Bio (i.e. Medical) around 9th, as then I was almost good for nothing. Couple of years with my home tutor did me good, and I went along peacefully to the Engineering, a term thinking of whom I imagined the cool looking bhaiyas of our colony wearing a new shirt almost every week and roaming around with girls. All they had to do, was to sit infront of a system where they did some kind of stuff called programming. I hardly cared, all I knew, that sometime in future, I have to sit infront of that system, earns buck and enjoy. All these went around timely and I settled down as per the allotted time. I guess Engineering was good, good because it made me very much to the point person, I became a social person, did silly pranks , scored and flunked, the final year campus placements, the almost successful love stories and crushes, all that together sewed in to complete me as an Engineer, which ofcourse about a million others did in my country every year. So I was one from the crowd. That was me on a short and boring note.

Anjali is she, a smile comes everytime on my face I called her name. Bubbly like a child, stubborn like an adult, intelligence at its own peak and tears drop out as quickly as flows water in a river.
I do not know how many correct decisions I would have taken in my entire life, but the best thing happened when I had to take none, coz it seemed someone up in the heaven had granted this for me.
I grew up watching a lot of movies, of all the genres available, the ones where hero had to struggle and make his life hard to get the girl and finally get it, so basically romance. SRK came as a natural favorite, and when life had me asking for K,,K,,Kiran. I met her !!

Bangalore has always been known for the amazing climate it presents, coming to the city and settling down here is not at all a big deal, what becomes as a challenge is the adjustment in your pace. The City is pretty fast paced, and if you do not find yourself , you might end up losing yourself. Thankful I was that I could do something manageable here and so was she.
A pretty normal day it was, when in the red hue sky I stepped out of office after a tiring day. After getting down at my bus stop, I stopped at a tea shop and took a seat on the greasy plastic chair in the small yard of the shop. As it was a friday, I was pretty relaxed and not so observant about the grease on the chair. Sipping in the tea slowly, I took a look around to find someone across the street. She had a face which seemed to shine even in the smoky evening, there was something about her. On a normal day, I would have seen this moment come and go, but this was different, I took out whatever change I had in my wallet, handed it over to the tea seller and walked. I walked towards her, crossing the busy road unknowingly, my heart was beating at a rate I had never felt before, though I had crushes in college, but this was the moment. May be this was it, the queen of my dreams in front of me. All the SRK pickup lines were coming to my mind like headlines in a news channel. The moment had gelled my heart and soul completely into it and I was running with only one thought in mind, I have to talk to her.

Sadly, that day turned out to be a hard fought one for me, as an alto bumped into me. All the dreams blurred, and the next moment that I was conscious, was in the hospital with everyone looking on me. My mom was holding my forearm and her eyes were all red. The Story of the evening was that due to my negligence, I bumped into the Alto which fractured my right forearm and I had scratches all over my left side of the body. While everyone around me, was deeply sad and indulged in me, my mind had only one question, would I be able to see her next ?

PS : Of course I did, but how and when, and what happened next are the ones you would know soon.

Another among the Millions !!

2014-09-27T15:25:00.000-07:00

Wrapped up in a dusty brown leather over a white shirt & blue denims,
Raging across the dry cold lanes of Kashmir on an Enfield.
Giving a damn to the world and its moh-maya, Flying free as a bird over the hazy meadows !!
This was the dream, this was the hope I wanted to near, this was the moment I wanted to capture !!
Ofcourse, Life has always had different plans !!

"Not everything will fall in your plate in a day, everything that you earn here, has to be earned and more importantly deserved", those were the golden words that kept buzzing Vikram's mind. A self inspired individual whose dreams inspired many others in college days, whose dreams only kept getting bigger as the gates were nearing the close. Like others, the guy had no idea that it would be difficult to dream with all the cushion later.
Like any typical Indian parents, Vikram's too had given a lot of stress on securing a government job to ensure a laid back and stable life throughout. Being placed in an Indian IT MNC giant from an average engineering college had given Vikram a small leap. To him, the suited corporates looked bright and shiny. He wanted to be one of them, he wanted to be in that neat looking attire with the responsibility of changing destiny of a firm with his decisions. Like the thousands every year, Vikram joined the IT lane and became one of those many lost faces in the crowd. Everything seemed so perfect in the beginning, even things that he was scared of coping up with, were coming to him as if they were meant for him. This was the dream start he had hoped for, and he hoped the dream would continue for long enough. With the heavy and strenuous training, he only developed appetite for assignment which were provided in the form of project allocations in this world. Clearing a small contest for that, only boosted his confidence before he set into the actual world where he was supposed to be tested and evaluated.

The days were young, the energy was contagious but not so was the environment, and it was not long before it started impacting him. Although he earned some awesome friends in the process, but the highs had almost taken a break, and it was time to only pick the best amongst the lows. His patience was put to test, his dreams were put on hold, he did not know what to expect next, but all that kept him on was the hope that it was only a phase, and as per the phrase, "This too shall" have passed but it did not. The glamour of this fast moving industry had some sharp thorns and for now, all those thorns seemed to have had a taste of Vikram's fortune. It was amazing how the small things of life had started to matter so much.
A Perfect start was important, but if not, this time was only a built up to something perfect in future. Amidst all this happening on one front, he kept himself motivated enough to keep up the fight. His friends stood like pillars he could depend upon, poor fellows had to undergo through a lot of melodrama. His young heart too fell for some hearts around which did not last long enough to yield any results.
" Where am I headed to ? Will I conquer my dreams ? Why was I the only one with all the trouble ?", the questions never stopped.
Time had started to respond, and there was a strong sense of belief that it will change, and will change for good. Thankfully, it did for some time, but as always it could not go on for long. It seemed almost as if everything he tried hard to pull in a positive direction, had to somehow end up in the wrong one. You cannot bet on time, as it never remains the same. The guy who had the capability of inspiring others with his sharp crisp dreams, was not even able to smile with his lips spread wide. There was a difference, a difference which had been clearly created by time.
Heart broken, dreams half shattered, but still the courage to walk up to the same road every weekday and sit infront of a machine which had no answers to emotions but only alerts for deadlines. Where was I ? A rented machine, who could think, design logics and programs for clients of my company who employed more than 60% of my country's literate population only because people in their countries were too lazy to churn their dreams. It seemed more that I was slaved for my own needs, than for my dreams. My mind had scares of my appraisals, my future and it seemed unfair.
My dreams were big, they were wide and deep. They kept me near the shore of happiness, they made me believe it was never a pursuit but only a state.
Today, is a different day, Today is more about going in a direction about which I have no idea where am I headed to, its more about closing my eyes and do what I have been told to. It burns my soul, it intrigues me, it questions me - When do you pull out the plug ?
I looked around me, I saw the same faces, and many who had accepted this to be their fate. I feared being one of them, but today, probably I am also one among them.

The One, who spends his/her share of happiness from Friday night to Sunday evening.
The One, who plans and cancels their personal plans coz of work.
The One, who fails to wish his/her best friends and relatives on their important days.
The One, who has almost vanished from society.
The One, who reaches up people only in times of need.
I am the One, just an another One among the crowd of millions !!
I am the One, who gains happiness when I travel out of my own country and lives alone abroad.

Vikram is not just one, there is a Vikram in all of us, each one of us goes through a Vikram phase in life, but probably the hope is to carry on !!
Life can pull you down for a while, but you can certainly pull it back if you believe you can !!

"The Dream of streaming through the Kashmiri valleys is still a hope,
The Clock might have slowed down the pace,
but the dream is still open wide.....
for the Clock has not stopped !!"

Blunt Truth of Indian Economy !!

2013-07-01T15:52:00.000-07:00

India Outsourced

Late in the day, clock strikes noon and half of my people in the city are still sleeping. Strange but true, today residing in one of the four metropolitan of my developing nation, is still dizzy for the day, they are hungover with work, family and life. What, why and how’s are things we have stopped asking since a longtime now. With what’s left, we have one hope we still rely on and that’s “Time will solve all our problems, all will be stabilized and probably that we will learn to live, this way or that way”.

India, a nation we always have held pride for, and will continue to be proud of it all our lives, does not matters what worse we have seen down here - the struggling population, the under-powered & deployed youth, the highly sophisticated but non-functional government and last, an agro based country which still prays for monsoons, coz without nature’s mercy, our farmers are rusted iron rods. The Country’s GDP still reads 72378.12 Indian Rupees, of an economy which is the 9^th ranked over the globe. 1947 – 2013, 66 Years passed down the slide of the calendars and time which should have differed by total indifference, is today only a mirror flip of the past. Climbing the ladders on global scale by being member of hundreds of councils and meets, what is exactly that we have implemented for ourselves, our jam packed crowds, our still struggling youth and the ever challenged women.

Umpteen promises of the ruling parties forming government, unexpected financial crunches of the MNCs, the never ending scandals of the people in operation, and the natural disasters, nothing comes to mind when I take down the data of this country in a blink. Generations changed, mindset changed, advancements tagged in, literacy increased drastically, but what we have been left with, deep fissures in our plates, insecure about the very next moment in our lives as is our economy, how deep are we rooted to our banyan. The answer remains that we do not know. We remain fancy props dancing to the tunes, an average crowd that we still form. Fathers still worry of age, not because that they do not have dough to roll their old age, but coz their young firing guns have romped out of the Indian Gates. And who have remained are either compromisingly frustrated as outsource checkpoints, and the pending rest, who Facebook.

Late in primary school, we came to know about the rural-urban differences in India, the ill history that had drubbed them miles behind on the roads of development, of the whole that I have seen better in the past two decades I have inhaled for, is infrastructure. Honestly, it is the only mainstay we have got support for & built, managed after so many Swiss bank transactions. Gandhi, Nehru, Singh, Patel, Shastri and drenched in blood & sweat had us many stories narrated, but which of those I should believe. My country is only a tight buttoned democracy, the only democrats that I have seen alive here are a section of society which enjoys privileges by the income they earn as celebrities, sons of “families”, the khadi team and not the mentionable.

And a bulk of my generation still outsources its life to IT,which has built many dreams but at the same time, drowned many potentials. The most recent trend, is the dumping of resignations in bulk & later repenting, coz when it happens, it seems the best decision, but sadly the gates outside remain closed. Thanks again to our dibbly dobbly economy with multiple dependencies.

Where am I? How do I race my generation? How do we contribute? Of what seems the possible plan, is to close our eyes, earn our mysterious CtCs, dip our tongues in sugar for appraisals and one fine day retire with a lush flat in the city, and wait for my life to get over. So after all this while, I come back to my topic, “India Outsourced”, which the world outside will read the other way, but the fact, it is the truth. So many deters, so many challenges, who do we ask to return, who do we ask to stay or just like one of my colleagues at work, who has a line jotted at his place “ This too shall pass”.

Memories to Eternity - A Tribute to the greatest friend

2012-11-10T00:16:00.000-08:00

Not so long back in time, about a decade was it, when I went for a trip to Delhi with my mother. The trip was purposeful, and was rather a short one. Once done in the capital, we snapped back to Patna, my hometown and got a surprise back home. On my first peek after return, I saw a very small four legged furry chap at our balcony. On a closer look, I remember dropping off all my luggage at the gate itself and rushing to see it. That particular moment, my heart seemed to be laughing in its own way when this cute four legged puppy, hardly of any height then, reached my shoes and started toddling around. He was as white as a polar bear, and the moment was as delightful as a baby's birth in family.

Since childhood, my brother & I, had this great urge to have a pet at home. And now that this little guy was here, we had a great time to look upto ahead in the future. With lots of names in mind & to make sure that he had the coolest name, we named him "Rocky", may be after Rocky Balboa or may be just that it was the first likable name that came to our mind. Rocky, became the meaning of our whole hours after school. Even at school we will keep smiling in our minds thinking of this little dude. He was hardly a month old, when he would keep running around, bark like how a baby mumbles and keep rolling around in the grass of our garden. In a way, he was cared so much that he became the youngest child to our parents, specially my Father, whom he would follow him all day till he was there in house. We would often tag him as an offender who used to be with us all day, and when my father used to get back from work, he would hardly even look at us.

With time, our little guy became a stud, he was known all over the family now. The best part, he knew how to relate himself with different members of the family, like for my grandfather & grandmother, he himself would get aside when they used to come, knowing that they feel awkward about getting touched. Sometimes, knowingly he would brush his tail with Grandma's saree and wag it in return to show love.

He would play around with all our friends and kids who came home. Sometimes when we used to play cricket, he would come in between, grab the ball & runaway with it, after which we used to run behind him begging for it. I still remember the way he used to grab the cricket ball and run away like an owner of it, with his tail up straight, was very funny.

He never liked a moment alone, there were moments when we were not present at home, he would reach up to my mother, wag his tail and ask for attention. As said earlier, he embraced the position of the youngest one in our family and why not, he kept all of us involved. From his funny rolls on the floor, to barking loudly when not attended to, Rocky was the star of our family.

There were moments when the family had a rough time, and it was quite an experience to notice the calmness & maturity that was reflected by him in those moments. Being a full-on lover of chicken, he would adjust with the vegetarian meal during Dussehra when Mum-Paa used to be on fast. All this convinced us even more that he was not just a pet at home, but rather a member who stood and understood everything.

Soon our schools got over, and I got drifted into my college and soon happened the same for my brother too, this was the phase where Mum-Paa would feel a bit empty at home, but thanks to Rocky, who kept them going. From running over the sofa to sleeping on the little bed in the drawing room, he kept them active and busy behind him for all those years. He would sleep up close to Paa's corner, right around the bed, used to go on walks with him in the morning, would celebrate their homecoming every evening when my parents used to return back from work. So in short, everyday was a celebration.

When we used to go home in vacations, we realized how much he had gelled us together. His friendliness was admired by all the kids in the family , whom he would often try scaring at first and accept them soon by the wag of his tail. Time kept ticking , and we never had a watch on it, we never noticed that he would be getting old. Never was a sign of it, that he was inactive.

Soon my college got over, and I had sometime before I joined in at my company, this was the period I cherished back again after college with this stud. I felt how much his presence meant for us, it was amazing how he would notice by the frequency of our car's horn and start flapping his padded feet on the balcony grill so that he could run upto the gate to receive my parents, where he would keep going 360 degrees around the vehicle, keep jumping on my father's door until he used to come out and embrace him.

Time passed and I joined my company, a new life started for me. I started planning gifts for everybody, was often left with a choice of a freezer full of chocolates for Rocky and his favorite cup ice-cream which he would eat in such a way, that nothing fell out of it ever. Luckily soon after my joining, I managed a short trip home for my parent's silver anniversary, where we made a video of which Rocky was a part too. I did observed that he had got a bit old, but I always knew he had time, for the notorious activities he was still involved with. All of us celebrated the event, and was an awesome get together, where we saw him too being an active participant.

After getting back, I did missed the environment there, but accepted this as how it stands in reality. Now, I had a couple of trips planned for every year, and the next one was supposed to be in Mar'13 coz of some auspicious reasons. I had started planning gifts for everyone including Rocky. Sadly, Rocky started falling for age late in October when he stopped eating anything, he would walk around the whole house and by the words of my parents, who kept telling he will be fine soon, I felt he might just not.

It was a nightmare when on 3rd Nov'12,the anniversary date of my first job, when Rocky passed away at noon. I was sleeping after coming back from work, and suddenly I heard my brother crying in a strange way. He mumbled out "Rocky", and I could not say a word more. My eyes got filled, and tears started dripping out of them. It was a hard moment, a moment of total disparity, felt like losing a gem of our life, like losing out someone who fills your life with lots of love and affection. Though I did not wanted to, but I had to accept it that he was no more with us. For a couple of days, I did not knew what to talk with my parents back home, he was the one who kept filling in for our absence for atleast 5 years, and it did felt like losing out on a member of the family. He left coz of his old age, and in a proper way in one way, he kept his exit simple than it would have got complicated with age. Later, when I talked to my parents, they would narrate how he kept them on their toes to attend him after work. He kept them involved. After talking to my father, who sounded as blank as never, I realized what he meant....

Yes, it hurts today that he is no more. Infact, it is still a question that what would be the reaction when my brother or I reach home and find an empty balcony. I never wrote anything for the past 4 months, but now that I have written, this remains my tribute to the greatest soul I ever met.

Hail your presence in the past, which left beautiful memories for the future !!

May you be back as shining soul on your rebirth !!

Lots of Love, Lots of Secrets , Lots of things which I ll keep passing to you !!

Had lots still to praise but cant hang on longer !!

Mridul-Tuktuk

Then, Now & Thereafter !!

2012-06-11T13:30:00.001-07:00

Then

"Who's had those stale parathas again ?" announced Radio, and we burst into laughter in a room where someone had just farted.

"Man, I'll miss you guys" was the mutual statement we all shared.

Tears, half curved smiles, expressionless faces, filled up the whole arena of the final year hostel. Damn, Four years of life passed as fuel smoked out at the shores. I walked back to my room, wrapped my camera to put it back and I got lost.

29th August'11....

Four Years Back on the same lane......

"Alarm clocks to wake up ?" who needed them, this was supposed to be the first day in an engineering college, "Engineering" to be precise of whose dreams were filled like mashed potatoes in parathas, here we were, joining together for a journey which was supposed to be of professional education , supposed to end on a happy ending four years down the line.

"Hey, I am XYZ, OJEE rank 00000" were the first line of geeky introducers.

"Hi, I am XYZ from PQR state" were the first line of normal introducers.

"Arey yaar, Hello. So pure taiyaar ? " were the first line of the ultramost normal introducers.

We laid onto our uniforms, a typical blue blazer, and looked into the mirrors.

"Not bad for an Engineer !!" thought of the day.

Walking in groups, and standing tall for the buses to arrive, while few were still stuck finding it hard on the ties. Life had moved on, for bigger & better things.

One Year down the line, things had changed, People were now pointed pointers. There were 9 pointers, 8 pointers, the evergreen 7 pointers and the coolest of all, 6 & below pointers, coz that was the standard by which we lived now. Fun was maximum at 6 and minimum at 9.

While some had started taking the smoke in, some had developed the taste for sour grapes , and some had just started to accompany them. There were perceptions, relationships and the ever happening weather changes of being a girlfriend - boyfriend thing, That had hooted in like the most super happening thing !!

It happened through the second, the third and arrived the fourth. By now, these 800 odd about to be Engineers of the future, were less of it than they were a family now. From bunking classes together, to standing for the whole year's prestige and the umpteen Cricket / Football matches on the fields, not just the friendlies, but along many friendly fires and white flags in friendly wars, we did not realised, that we shared was not just friendship , but a hardcore relationship.

Arrived days , when we got selected to be paid off after college, but the days were passing by too.

They started in months, lessened to days, and soon to one day, when the whole lot appeared for the last paper of their graduation and broke their nibs on the last sheets.

"Papa Kehte hai beta naam karega", probably kiya !!

The Shiver stuck me, and here I was back to the present.

"Move on, Idhar hi rahega kya ? " here was Ching again, so eager to get back home.

"I wish I could", was all I could whisper to myself.

The Bonds had to split , the tears had to come rolling out, and the promises of "We'll meet again" were again here. We felt bad when our seniors said that, today we felt how bad it really felt.

Now

In a house, where my windows are always open as used to be the doors in hostels. The Air keeps coming in, with the heat of Chennai and the cool breeze of it in the evening.

I wish , they were friends, who popped in every hour of the day. Friends, who had to be sometimes said, "Abe ja, thoda padh bhi le " , "Abe kitna hawa dega saale ".

Miles away from each other, miles from our homes, miles from our wickets and bats, miles from the drumsticks and guitars, but stand tall our memories of the land we cruised through fun.

A Trip planned to meet in December, who knows how much of it may come true.

We've started rocking on the rocking chairs, planning our future, cutting out on our expenses, thinking of the best gifts for our parents, relatives, girlfriend etc etc....

Thereafter

Dreams , which never end. Dreams of delivering speeches in the boardroom, to standup tall as an icon in the family, a BMW at a cozy villa, an Ultimate figured partner and a highly aspired salary.

Strange is life, stranger than fiction, harder in the eyes of reality.

Probably true, "Tum kya lekar aye the, Kya lekar jaoge"

Dream today, ahead and everafter, for the memories which I hold, I have many in those pages, where I flip any moment, I flip a dream.

From racing into the IPL Listing, to designing the fastest machine, to the best antivirus, to the best actor/actress, to the national dance competitions, I've it all in those pages.

Few've started, Few are somewhere around, and those in queue, will boom later !!

Out of emotions or just some quick fingers on the keyboard, F.R.I.E.N.D.S. , This is for You !!

Dream Girl and Hail her !!

2012-05-06T12:55:00.000-07:00

Through the blurry vision in green meadows, I saw a girl with her hair rising high to the zephyr across the smooth greenery. Nothing had struck me better as this did. I starred at her like a crow, and yes, all she managed to pass on, was a smile, out of surprise or probably to let go my stare. I paced my steps across the turf, to reach out to her and hold her tight in my arms. By this time, even I don't know how she turn around to me, and was expecting me around , hanging her hands out to reach me. And yes, I almost reached her hand, when she disappeared like a lost leave on the streets.

"Wake up you dumbass, you'll be late again to work", cried out my brother, kicking my ass at a nominal enough speed to shake me out of fantasy. I checked my watch and it said, I deserved it. With few moments that I had to ponder, I sat down on a chair in the other room looking out through the window to the terrifying sunshine of Chennai. Lost in the miles of my dream was I again, and here I was, trying my best to go back to my moment of glory.

Bright and fresh, I reached out to the esteemed daily, and here I was stuck to its contents yet again. In the dreams of my life, where I always neared the princess across the meadows, the forts and heaven, here was a girl, on the streets , in tore pieces of coverings and in a depressed state of mind. The clock was ticking over and so I thought to sit down over it on the weekend. It seems a different day altogether when you already have something running on your mind, while I passed across the hustling streets and boarded along the sweaty crowd, I had a thought running in my mind. Every lady I saw on the way, I visualised the threads she was stitched to in society. Damn yes, for the first time in my life probably, I was thinking this way, probably for the first time I was thinking for someone I never knew, never grew with, never talked with. Had one question, boomeranging my mind, Am I the only one concerned or is this just one of those mornings ?

India 2020, a dreamland where all the aspirations are living by, where all the dreams are resting to hay. About which , every minister lays back on his seat in air conditioned chamber to claim, "We'll be on the top by then, let us do our work".

I ask today "We'll top on how many lists by then ?"

To name the assured ones from now, Corruption, Crime and Poverty.

Back to where I was roaming about, concerned about the existence of genders on the same grade and same state. Last two weeks of my life have been quite happening and impacting, coz from listening to demands of marriage of a friend's sister to viewing a terrific show on television, all of them asked one thing with a question mark in bold, ? , loud and clear.

"Is all this nation headed today, is for money, power and credentials on the global trade ?"

None can deny, coz it is headed for that only, its not headed for peace in its own fields , coz the fields are getting snapped by the nuclear deals and the hi-tech infrastructure where the worsts of incidents have happened. From introducing the cheap concept of call girls to the upgraded version of escorts, I see today, Women are catching the eye as a material of entertainment, leaving her degraded of her abilities , coz she's the one who holds the shores of the society. A form of human , who has resisted tons & tons of unjust which has prevailed since ages on her. From the rural lands where people have been accused to be illiterate for the incidents, the avalanche has drifted into the urban lands with much impact, all credit to the literate mind for this.

People say "Shit happens" and they let go things, but what if shit sits on the roads daily. And to be honest, it really does on the sheets of our dailies when every morning the corners read Rapes,Honour Killing,Female Foeticide,Tortures of Dowry,Sex Abuse & the continual use of women as a form of entertainment and a platform to launch all retarded things.

India's most heritage inherited land is the land of most sick things happening to women, Rajasthan, I wish the heritage of yours existed for real in your minds when in the eras of highness, women were roses which never withered away.

Dowry, sick of the retards who still encash women to be married in their families, and a food for thought to the ones who approve it, Kings in history did it because it was a event to be celebrated with exchange of lucratives, not a game of filling up their treasury.

Honour Killing, Sex Abuse, Domestic Violence have lived all through the years, at some point it was Sati, today its rose a point, when its worser than that. It almost like living through the pyres and the fire of Sati.

Rapes, are stuffed into papers as much as potatoes in Indian dishes, they are in , everywhere.

Sick of the plans and programmes of the government, where a clear proofed sting operation in Rajasthan lies in the court yet to put ban on Doctors involved in foeticides.

In one word, the Y-Gen says "Fuck'em".

From the tunes from what I have gained past my twenty odd years, Women have been everything in a man's life for every good reasons, and genuine ones. Mothers, Best Friends, Best Listeners, Best Philosophers and Best Inspirations, Women O Women, I owe you my hat.

Hats Off !!

I ll hail you forever !!

Presence Appreciated, thanks to Eve that found Adam !!

And there chemistry found us !!

And you are hereby, my dream forever !!

Dreams & Aspirations - Typically Indian !!

2012-04-16T11:15:00.001-07:00

In the land where the Legends wrote history and the history made them the rulers of the golden pages of the present, India has been a land where people made it through nothing to everything. Ambani, a merely known surname when born to a nothing to do family , has the world on his feet today. Anil Aggarwal, another such personality who had to bite the dust and cross over the limits to passby the shores where nothing awaited him except success. Not just these "A" lettered people, but many who wrote the script of their lives on their own will and mantras. Life, never had a full stop for them and what it always had were commas, which kept getting added to their achievements, figures and the never ending following.
Today, I stand by those achievements and I too typically feel, passion is what must have rode them through this journey, for life is never a smooth x=y plot on a graph, its always something which has had spikes prefixed by nature and postfixed by human. I stand by reading these achievements and these names piffled out by my friends. The same urge and the same desires that a youngster typically dreams about in each corner of this nation, our nation is one where we breathe dreams. Not me, not just my platoon of college, but the whole 60% youth population of India who are the high tides on the walls of the world's future. Few choose, fight and falter, while few script, fight and alter.
Meant to change and meant to bring the pieces together, not just me , a just earning IT guy in Chennai believes that there are enough reasons to dream and achieve, but the whole setup, inspires you to become an aspirant of what may become the reason to live your life for this nation. Craziness to achieve, the desires to back plan after plan , and the will to go nuts about anything and everything. Life won't stop and it should never, but the dreams shouldn't either, for you are the reason it exists !!

Not everyone is lucky to make the numbers count for real,

Few who believe that these are not just numbers which got discovered,

But figures which made the whole world go round & around,

So why not you today,

That the future blooms and You're the one found !!

In Love, For time or Forever ?

2012-04-02T12:31:00.001-07:00

Flipping the pages of an old diary where I wrote thousands of words for my first one sided love, and now over to flipping the memories of those countless moments where life’s struck me, if she’s the one, life’s demanded so much out of me. For a time resided, where life was all about being brought up, gain knowledge till graduation & enter the world of being an employee. Now is a time, where it has gone so choosy, people want to live it the way they like, take challenges to the shores of extreme, and choose what they really want to be & have in life.

Taking over from the philosophical aspects of what everyone has lived through & experienced, walking down the lanes of the Y-Gen streets have been something worthy to live around. A platform of experiments from which everyone has picked up their own choices and left down some for others to choose, the setup has been a praiseworthy. Not long back in history, when SRK was the only man alive on earth who knew how to tickle the laughter of romance, & today down in the 21^st century of time, it’s a time when every teen is a Romeo / Juliet by themselves.

Time travels, and who on earth says it stays, but If I look on these streets of present where being in Love is more like a stock investment which fluctuates truly better than the real stocks do in the market, I think if this is really it. If this is all we started for, if this is all we live today for, where Love is more like a nail which around the magnet. For I do not hold any privileged decree to approve, but sometimes its disappointing when I have to end up saying a friend in relationship , “ Are you in this seriously or is just a breeze?”

For all the life that’s left with you to breathe in, be a sport in life for the things you need to , and for things when it matters you for love, success & dreams, never just let it go scribbled on the rough sheets of your canvassed life as people back in time had not much to do with, but had plenty to live with.

“ If you loved being with it for once,

And wanted it forever,

Better burn your fuel,

For the love may not last forever”

Fresh on the shores of being independent, and true on the passion of being dependent,
Life is up here again in search of the reality than falling over for mirages.

The War Within !!

2012-03-25T13:00:00.002-07:00

15th August 1947, was the day when India took a free breath in the world which was fighting to demonstrate power & domination. Be it the United States of America (USA) or the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (USSR), the wait was over and the huge masses kept fighting themselves for the ball to arrive in their court. It took years, sacrifices and destruction of huge property for them to realize , the world was not left about gaining power anymore, but it needed them to come together & promote the peace in it.

India, which was drooling for good things to come by, wasn’t yet aware of the time to come, & it had to resist even harder when Pakistan launched attack in the war of 1960’s. India did not knew what she was even fighting for, to protect its people or to protect its just earned presence on the globe. Years passed on, the political wars , the scams , the hard done things continued to rain in, though there came many who built the nation for once & forever, but the sting of negativity remained in the system. People had criticized the ruling Englishmen for “Divide & Rule” policy, but the division was done already. The Sections had already been classed, people had a different vision for different classes of people & that was when, the mistake had piled on for the worse in future. The losses kept on piling , the carnage at Rajiv Gandhi’s speech, the scathe at Mumbai Blast in ’91 and the ever on going duel between India & Pakistan.

Present day, 25th March ’12, when India has launched herself miles into the era of development, she still has those scratchy nails on her back. While Pakistan continues to occupy a tidy part of J&K, and the US continues to dominate & react inadvertently on our decisions, India is headed to another war springing with time badly, the Maoists. The War within has held upon the Nation’s nerves badly and this is what I am upto this time.

It was just a normal Sunday morning in the boiling heat of Chennai, as I slapped over the pages of The Times of India on a note to find something interesting and involving in it when I had my eyes on a scintillating headline.

“Italians abducted by Maoists in anger against the Government”, said the Headlines which had an innocent looking White man in the pictures along his wife.

The Man, a resident of Italy, who was in India since a long time, as a tourism manager for a tourism & hospitality firm had been abducted by the Maoists on nothing less than a normal day in his life. The Statements released by the Government were sick and rather very amusing.

“We are trying our best, but the man should not have clicked pictures of the tribe”, had aired out a minister in his typical tone.

“Bad, this is really going nowhere. None is looking properly into it, they all seem lost in retailing their budget for the year so that they have plenty to gulp in”, as said by an Inspector.

Where to go, whom to trust, where there are people who don't expect Khokhas in return to do our work?

Corrupt they are, and they breathe an air of it. For there's no shadow that beats down its own marker, but there are reasons if fought for , We, the People of India have to plenty to get answered to.

The tremors are in our own land, We need to bury and end this up.

Why Am I writing this?

It’s simple, I feel I’ve grown up enough in this land to raise my voice against what has been going wrong consistently in this part of the world.

Are law and order just for name in our Nation?

Is the Defense rather just a name than being a team in existence?

They talk big, they pass out matters saying, “We don’t have people in our nation who want to come up and take responsibility”.

And I ask today, “If We really don’t, then would you keep doing this to us?”

A Nation where every morning you’ll find people at tea stalls rowing over political arguments of this nation, where every journey in a train has a compartment where there is a huge clash of opinions if India-Pakistan Division was right & if the reservation exist.

The Part missing out of everyone’s mind, the War which is burning the nation internally, the Maoists , ULFA & other forces, who are just living free & destructing everything within. The War is on, and its within, if there are eyes on this..

Go, do something about it !! If you seek youth, show us the right path.

This will work only when its a mix of those hands who ve seen everything, and those who are ready to do everything.

I ll do what is in my hands, but if you ought to be a reader of this, then voice your concern so that it’s heard.

“For this Nation has seen little of prosperity and more of agony”

Shellshocked in the Locals of Chennai !!

2012-03-20T13:26:00.000-07:00

"Let's move out guys", said a tired Sameer.

"But where dude?", it was Rizwaan with his typical craze for all the doubts in the world that came to him.

"Arey, Chal Marina !! Apna Marina Beach ", and there was always a pumped up Mahesh.

"Run , Run , Run", was all I could manage.

It had been quite sometime at our new office, and we were still to be allocated into these IT Projects which mapped the entire globe into one 5 storied building. The Period of doing nothing , was obviously the best time to have fun , roam around the Metropolitan city of Chennai, but trust me, the weather took alot out of that interest. We walked across to the nearest Local Train Station, and there was our train to our Hogwats's "Marina Beach", the longest beach in whole of Asia. Honestly, We were out to chill and have some fun by the waves, but who knew it would not be just an another trip.

We boarded the train, and the train just pulled out in 30 seconds.

"Wow, This is nothing less than Delhi Metro except that it gets a bit more wiped out", I announced it to everyone.

It was my first local train trip in Chennai, so there were definitely some butterflies.

"You like being like this, Don't you Kid ? ", laughed out a jovial Mahesh.

It was awesome, I really did not expected if I'll really enjoy to go out in the rigid daylight of Chennai, but as the train started going past the tall skyscrapers of some top companies on the globe, my eye balls were stuck on them. Suddenly, what happened, is the reason why I composed this.

Whammm !!! And his cheeks were red.

Whammm !!! And his eyes were hue.

Whammm again !!! And I wished if I could stop it.

"Who was he ?".

A normal 15-16 years Lad who was being carried around to someplace to work.Yes, He was a child labour. A Lad who deserved to be putting on his bag and go to instill the wings of education in him, but this was perhaps destiny. We saw a merciless master dropping out slaps as if they were atom bombs at Hiroshima & Nagasaki on a boy who deserved none of it, and was sleeping cozily in the beating sun of Chennai, dreaming the best he could about his life, but quite amazing what he was upto.

"Damn Why", I whispered to Rintu, another friend who was sitting beside me.

All I could see then, was not a shocked Mahesh, a "who cares in the world" Rizwaan, and my other colleagues, it was just that guy, on whom I had dedicated all my attention & praying that he could get up so that the slaps could stop.

The Train reached a passing station & they got down, perhaps the presence of that boy in my life should have departed from my life right then, but it was just then when the situation just stood on me & asked me, "What if it was you ?"

I sat on the beach with my friends, and it kept winding my mind that why in the world I could not do anything than to just see it happen then. "Child Labour" & "Child Abuse" were these mere two words that were included in the Acts of Constitution of India. I saw faces of Mahesh, Rintu, Sameer, Rizwaan & other who wanted to get up and bash the man, but was it right to do so in a city we were just settling in.

What did I do ?

Why I could not ?

If these two were to be answered, I would say, I did not do anything coz I dint had enough courage to standup for that little guy who was getting bashed up by a Guy who seemed full drunk and in a state to do anything. All I could mumble out then was "Aaahh, Why don't you leave him ?"

The question that keeps hitting my mind to date, " Is India really a true Democratic Secular Republic Nation ? "

And I hang out again, to what the next part will come out as a story to shake you from within.

Message :-

I am just a normal citizen of this nation, who wants us, the people of India to rise and fight for the rightful.When I say fight, I mean, give your disappointments a true reason, so that you have people who want to correct them.

~ FlY By ~

2012-02-18T04:31:00.001-08:00

Nothing comes as graceful,

As comes talent from heaven,

Nothing stands as apart,

As does truth from the forbidden,

You see a million happy curves down the mile,

what you dont see,

Are often the plastic reasons in those smiles,

Life's been a season & often game,

but there's no reason why there be still complaints,

There are always dreams,

which often fly by,

while there are many,

which just die..

You give yourself a reason,

to stand and live tall,

What you often miss out on,

Is a simple wish,

Give it a push,

Give it a try,

coz there's nothing as delightful,

as is to see self,

Fly by !!

Rock it,

Beat it,

Never just let that rhythm die,

coz for all the different reasons that you end it in a while,

Ders will be a million more,

to Fly By !!

The Reserved and the Unreserved..the eternal battle within

2011-07-27T04:00:00.001-07:00

Long back when there was a lost India facing its doom, when even on being one enormous presence on the globe, it was hardly getting its recognition. India was in a lost world, facing the worst of its time, the country was a combination of broken states under different ruling kingdoms - the Royal Mughals, the Englishmen , the Dutch, the Portuguese & many others. While these Kingdoms kept fighting for power in their times, the commons had a huge cold topic settled in their brains. People were cast into classes of recognition, they were provided with a status rank and were treated as per it. The World moved on, but ours stayed the same. Time favoured India and arrived a man with the golden brain - Mr. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, & in few years of his presence in the battle of freedom, India never looked the same again. A line which seemed impossible to be thought of earlier, was now at its feet and India was breathing fresh air of freedom without any restrictions for the first time. Thoug the nation had fought its doom & came victorious, but the battle was yet to be won within, where religionlism & casteism had backfired. In came Mr. Raja Ram Mohan Roy, and he made serious amends to the mentality of the masses, he strived in a revolution which raised the thinking of people. Though the move paid rich dividends, but as had happened earlier, the impact did not left a mark on the whole. Years passed by, India kept enriching her presence in the world, the world within calmed down a bit , the masses were happy with her doing good. The war within kept rolling and unrolling, people got divided in sections of General (GE) , Other Backward Classes (OBC), Minorities, Scheduled Castes (SC) & Scheduled Tribes (ST) with certain numerical percentages reserved for them everywhere. The numbers which seemed a respite at first, had ignited a spark, and it was then when India lost her individuality and got bifurcated into several streams of life. Lots happened in between, the mishaps, the reconsiderations, the unexpected wraths, but they stood together against everything. The numbers thus, were infact the boundaries built in between them. And today, when the Nation is nearing its 54th year of Independence, I just have a feeling that more than the Government needs to, People need to think over if they need these numbers for their presence, coz now is the time when after diminishing these numbers , India can really come up as one giant superpower where her people are standing are right behind her & working as one, instead of being mere percentage numbers in society. Though at the moment, this remains a thought, the execution & amendments remain open to the mango people.

Lets go India, lets march ahead now..!!

A Slow yet steady change - Rise of Bihar

2011-07-27T03:28:00.001-07:00

It was August 2007, when I had to leave Patna for my engineering from Gandhi Institute of Engineering & Technology,Orissa. The years passed by, I heard quite good things about the state and the good things kept increasing down the years. Though I always used to come back during my vacations, but I hardly used to get any chance to observe the changes. Today when I used to get any chance to observe the changes. Today when I have completed my engineering, & resting myself in the break I have before joining an organization, I see things have changed for good around me. The People, the core of any developing process, are now much aware of things happening around and are much open to accept new things which they feel is acceptable and not above the line. Though a section of society has always been there which has not accepted the changes, but with the impact of time, they have not been a barrier. The State Government has marched ahead implementing new plans, working on social welfare, has given due importance to commercial development & the future looks appreciable. Due credits to the Chief Minister, who has worked keeping a target in mind on the long run, as thing around were not in a position to take a U-turn overnight. The process has been a bit slow, coz it needed to be corrected from the roots but has ensured to be a steady one. The future of Bihar certainly seems bright as I walk through these lanes of 2011.

Hours that changed a life

2010-09-21T14:49:00.002-07:00

"Walkin away from the shadows,

of my own,

i see things happening now,

in everyway wrong,

they seem all useless,

and people all morons,

coz i've just seen the reality,

and the happiness seems all gone...

It seems as if,

i was wrong to dream,

and it feels now,

i just want to scream,

the does not even come up,

as easily it used to be,

and i feel now,

i v lost something won,

i do not see any way out of dis,

i just do not know how to make it,

its gone so different with thes few hours moved on .."

Going Across the Limits where the world says "ITS OVER"

2010-02-23T04:43:00.004-08:00

They say its over if you say NO, and its all back alive, if you really want it to be so.True to the utmost level,things in our lives are just a creation of our perception about them.The way we think about things, the way we look after them & of course, the way we react to them.Its the stimuli that really matters, perhaps its not something which is always predictable.There are moments when we realize our real potential and straightaway lash onto them.Its something which is a typical response of a being.Of course,its none but HUMANS.We lash onto things which we find beneficial for us, we run away from things which are of no use.This is something to which everyone has to accede.Everytime things around get messy, they seem grotesque & take hell of a stride into our lives & make it even more miserable.There are instances at the same time where we think its over, we cannot give it anymore & so, we just step behind without even judging for once if it is really so.Things for sure do not change overnight, but its the efforts and the dedication towards anything,a person really wants to achieve.It is all the same as the famous quote says that "Rome was not built in a day" & that's the bare truth.We cannot achieve anything in just a wink, it takes in something to give out something that really matters.Things have changed in this world, people have become smarter.They know exactly what to do and how to do even before it matters.They have many permutations and combinations to make it to their dreams but just a few of them make it through, some of them give it up half way while some give it up saying it was just a try,to make it across their dreams.They try acting complaisant about their faults but why,does it really matters to people around.What really matters is what you do with your own life, screw it up or just tighten it from everyside & make sure that there's no seepage through it & all the sediments are there when you open it up a day.There are perhaps many stalwarts who have done it in the past & there are still many more on the cards who will make it someday.They don't like being noticed,they do not want people's ovation coz to them, what matters is just their complacency.
There's no words like "IMPOSSIBLE" in the dictionary of achievers coz they make them possible everytime.There's nothing flimsy in their dreams, there's nothing hollow in what they achieve & that's the reason only why, they make it to the other end of the horizon.And as far as things which we see happening around in this world, it is quite gray.The atrocities in this world have become worse.Now, even they exist in myriad shades but its the ones who really perceive it well & make it to the other side where happiness,joy & manifold of theirs exist.And to me, its only them who make the world a place to live and breathe with a will to feel that "AAL iz WELL ".I ll like to conclude my thoughts with just a quote of my own.

"Look into the mirror & see what it reflects,

Sneak into your heart & find what it beats for,

Stare at the night sky & challenge the stars,

Challenge them that you'll be one of them on the earth,

And, you ll be the one,

Who makes it to the other side of the horizon,

The horizon which has been left unconquered,

And everything will be yours,

Your Life,Your Love & Your Dreams"

Freaky Engineer

2009-12-26T14:36:00.003-08:00

Since the moment,

i saw that sheet,

my eyes have gone red,

and gone is all that sleep...

Everyone around,

has got so busy,

yet i am the one,

running from being so freezy...

All of them,

seem so nerdy around,

i hate them all,

what's so nasty in here,

has the earth gone round...

Even the girls are gone,

mugging their notes,

am i fool,

still copying those wrotes...

I still wakeup late,

when there's everyone awake,

they all just stare,

& have a smile shared,

they still think the same,

stinks so cheap,

"Am gonna beat you,

& take a big leap"...

I still not understand,

why do i wander,

the dates are so close,

and still i ponder...

Here comes the day,

the clock's running near,

i jump off the bed,

with a little fear...

Arrive those hours,

when schmucks overpower,

yet am the one,

busy taking a shower...

I enter the hall,

so neat & clean,

the questions seem so blurry,

that even my pen refuses to hurry...

I come out of the hall,

hiding all my tears,

those schmucks query me again,

"are you gonna clear"...

I look upto the heaven,

& murmur a little prayer,

"Not this time again,

i'll give my best next time,

& won't let you complain oh dear"...

All those dates,

somehow passed by,

they gave me some pain,

& a few tears...

The days yet again,

seem so nice & clear,

the stage is all set,

with all friends back & again near...

Moments just pass,

giving everytime a smile,

the girls seem so sexy,

after a long while...

The papers are checked,

the results are near,

there are a few worries,

still no fear...

Down comes the day,

i again didn't cleared,

i flush out my mind,

in thick heavy tears...

Everyone around,

pats my back,

& out comes the same line,

i've been listening for years,

"No worries pal,

next time around,

you'll sure clear"......

Greenery...Don't end it up !!

2009-11-02T01:59:00.002-08:00

Listen to the rhythm of the falling rain,

its just so free without any pain,

the soothy smell of this wetty earth,

makes us still feel of the greenery dearth,

the heaven even cries,

for the shed down woods,

the people down here,

are still busy making their food....

Nobody cares what may happen next,

its just few articles and some touchy text,

has anybody ever,

thought of the depletion around,

it might not take long,

when there's nothing left,

except barren grounds....

oh my people !!

just listen to me,

care for the nature,

else we wont be,

care for the greenery,

else the planet wont be....

Recession....where i seemed to loose all,but yet not all

2009-11-02T01:48:00.002-08:00

Just don't know,

why this happened with me,

things are so confusing,

which once greeted with glee..

why am i the one,

trapped in this crowd,

there seems to be no opening,

where i can find my ground..

it was a time once,

when i dreamed of earning in dollars,

now is a time,

where i dream to earn..

still waiting for the day,

when these gray cloud disappears,

and am the one,

who conquers this fear..

Only then i ll have,

the dignity to wave at the ones who are near,

and only then i ll have,

the will to lead with utmost cheer..

All the boards,

would be calling me around,

then i ll be the one,

to accept or reject their pounds..

Then will the time,

i have been waiting for so long,

i ll ask her for the ring,

and there will be no obstructing moron..

know this is no time,

to dream so big,

but these are the moments,

i can still cherish..

this is no dream,

but my true life,

and am still ready,

to put up a fight....

RECESSION-You NeVer Know Wats up Next.....

2009-10-17T09:33:00.002-07:00

Its not been too long...neither the period has been something really short....but the breakdown of these three to four months has costed many their dreams. Just before Recession struck, there were many who were dreaming of bagging a job whose pay would be in dollars & afterwards, bagging a job even in the national currency was out of the scene.The scene has got even worser with time, the profile of the students have gone to all time low.Especially for those who are pursuing higher studies and were/are on the verge of bagging their careers.With no option left,everyone has now walked out for pursuing higher studies in their respective fields.
Everyone has their own priorities & goals to be targeted once set.And with this rash period on,almost everyone has forgotten about the same.All everyone is thinking about is somehow to meet the basic needs.All we have in hand is a badly accepted compromise whose impact will be there for some good time.Can easily remember times when on meeting the toppers of our senior batch, they used to talk of getting a good job in the giants, as of now they talk of somehow settling somewhere or even being able to make a start.
Sure, this is nothing just a period but for we people who are/were standing at one of the most important stage of our life.Its just like facing this sort of situation was out of expectation.All that is holding us is the patience & self-belief.So,without looking back & getting sad, we are ready to rock and roll.

Come whatever it comes, we are ready to face the blade....!!!!

My love-Its just my life ( just a rap )

2009-09-27T04:25:00.002-07:00

Hey Guys n Gals,
b4 u read this,i wanna tell you.this is a rap,so better read it so but its a very touchy rap that just came out of nowhere for me. A line was enough to proceed further...

My love-Its just my life

I just don’t know,
what r u talking abt,
neither do i care,
what it is abt.
i havnt come here,
to take this shit along.
its just my life,
that am carryin along..

doesnt even matter,
who's listenin dis song.
its just for you baby,
that i stood even against the wrong,
i havent even cared,
what am i about,
i just want you here,
to listen me loud,
even thru da shadows of my own,
i ran away,
just for you and dreams of own..
its just my life,
that am carrying along..

why dont you care,
i still love you alot,
that rainy evening,
and dose rainy drops,
dose were the moments,
i still standby..
i just cant think,
y rnt u nearby,
am i still less,
than what you expected to be,
doesnt this matters,
that i walk alone..
its just my life,
that am carrying along..

am walking thru the dark,
these days alone,
but still i expect,
you would come and hold me on,
i just cant see you,
crying like this,
walk by my side,
i ll gift you a kiss,
wont let your tears,
to fall even once,
y cant u come,
leaving ur fears alone,
am still the same,
& love you even more than d days gone,
its just my life,
that am carrying along...

dont know how much,
i would link this to you,
just a little wish,
that i have in ma heart for you,
close your eyes,
and think abt me once,
am i still not in the frame,
where we two are the same,
lots of innocence and the pain,
but its the truth,
we have to face alone,
i wont leave your hands,
whatever may stand,
i wont let you ever,
face your fears,
i ll stand against them,
even if they take my tears,
i just want you,
to be with me,
i love you still the same,
even though,
i have faced the pain,
that's y i expect,
you would come along,
and hold me on,
and hold me on....

One Fine Day...

2009-07-20T01:26:00.001-07:00

One fine day,

i saw a dream,

It had all d moments whom i wanted my lyf 2 scream,

all those moments were captured in a reel,

coz it had alot to do with my zeal,

it wasnt only about my name,

coz i wanted to earn a classy fame,

my dreams were in a lock,

till i got a pleasant shock,

down came my chance,

and i stood strong with a hefty stance,

i crossed all the hurdles vich came my way,

till i rested on puffy hay,

it was my need,

coz i wanted my soul to lead,

And it was only possible due to dis special ray- One Fine Day.....