Believe it or not...

4 years? Whoops.

2016-02-19T10:49:00.000-06:00

Let's not even pretend that I'm going to do a good job keeping up. I'll probably never do a good job keeping up. This blog is just another item on a long list of things that I'd like to do regularly but just don't seem to have the time or motivation for (like exercising daily, taking pictures, catching up with old friends, etc.). So much has changed since 2012 that it almost makes my head spin. We bought our first house (and we LOVE it!). I completed four egg donations. We celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary, and Big C turned 30. I started a new job in 2012 and changed career paths altogether in 2015. The boys started preschool in 2015 and will be starting kindergarten this fall. Oh, and I'm 23 weeks pregnant with another bouncing baby boy due June 17!

It makes me tired just thinking about how far behind I am on chronicling our lives. I initially intended for this to be a great way to "journal" everything that happens to us, but with my job change in 2012 also came greatly decreased access to uninterrupted time at a computer (more about that later).

I'll do my best to hit the high points, and I'm sure I'll fall behind again in about 16 weeks (if not before then), but at least I'm making the effort. This is what my real life looks like - the constant trying, succeeding, failing, and trying again. I've never painted a too-good-to-be-true picture of our lives in what I write or what I present in general. I have a lot of reasons for this, but mostly it's because if my kids ever want to look back and read anything I've written, I want them to have a realistic glimpse of what our life looked like. Sometimes it was wonderful, and sometimes it sucked. I've always had some irritation toward people who only show the best side of life because let's be honest here - nobody on this planet has a life that is all glitter and roses. It just doesn't exist, but you can skim any social media site and quickly find several people who make it seem like their existence is nothing but joy and wonder. I feel like trying to pretend that everything is sunshine and rainbows just leads to unrealistic expectations and frustration. I'm not interested in presenting a ridiculous façade of having a perfect life. For starters, I'm too tired to pretend or sugar coat the reality, and even if I had the energy or the time, I still wouldn't want to.

I am, however, interested in being honest and up front about what our life looks like. Is it amazing? Yes. Is it wonderful? Yes. Is it perfect? Absolutely not. I yell at my kids. I constantly question my ability to be a good mother and wonder just how badly I'm screwing them up on a regular basis. I get irritated and sometimes pick fights with my husband. We have student loans, cars, and a credit card that we are working to pay off. My family deals with a lot of personal issues that, while they aren't mine to share, definitely have an impact on my stress level and often cause rifts in some of my personal relationships. Just last night, after a week of little things that typically wouldn't phase me, but because I'm pregnant, tired, and emotional, I broke down crying in the car over something ridiculous and stupid. I fight battles of wills with the tiny humans every. single. day. and it wears on my patience and my nerves.

But we also laugh a lot every single day. We paint trains and go to the trampoline park. We talk. We snuggle, watch movies, and read books. We take vacations as a family and as a couple. We hug and kiss, and we love so fiercely that sometimes it's overwhelming. Is it a perfect life? Not by societal standards. Is it so much more than I ever earned, deserved, or believed I would have? 1,000 times YES.

Internet Friends?

2012-07-21T08:21:00.001-05:00

I admittedly am a terrible friend. I'm possibly the world's worst friend, actually. That being said, it should come as no surprise that I have very few true friends. I have a ton of acquaintances, any of which could develop into wonderful friendships given the appropriate time and effort; however, I'm selfish and hoard the majority of my time for my family. I'm busy and often tired and given the chance to see a friend or spend time with my husband and children, I will almost always choose the later. Let's be clear, it isn't that I don't enjoy spending time with friends - I very, very much do - but I can't seem to get enough of those cute baby laughs. I'm addicted and can rarely turn down an opportunity to spend more time with my family. I guess this is a problem because lately Big C and I seldom have coinciding days off work leaving me with few options when I do find myself with some extra time and the desire for some adult conversation (or commiserating, depends on the day!). What is the answer to a problem I didn't even realize I had? The Bump MoMs.

Since becoming pregnant with the boys (about 100 years ago), I've become part of a group of women with one common thread - we all have multiples. Twins, triplets, quads, adopted, spontaneous, whatever. We've all got at least one set of twins or higher order multiples. And let me tell you, in my experience, nothing creates a bond between friends faster than this particular shared lifestyle. You can't really understand the worry, stress, and joy of multiples unless you've got a set yourself.

I stumbled onto The Bump while I was pregnant and then discovered the Multiples forum while on bedrest. The posts on this forum range from "I'm having TWINS!! SQUEEEEE!!!" to "Recommend your stroller" to "How do I get them to nap at the same time?!" and everything in between. Before my babies were born, I thought "well, I'll just figure it out as we go. Can't be that hard." HA. It was. I'm not sure what we would've done without the advice from some of the ladies I've friended from that board. They talked me down when I was near panic at the thought of 30 week preemies, and practically held my hand when I was terrified about my first outing alone with the babies. They convinced me that we really were going to live through the days of two hour feedings around-the-clock, and they were right. It's incredible how close of a friendship you can develop with someone whom you've never physically met. Meeting people can be so overrated ;)

I always thought it so strange to be friends with someone you didn't "know," but now I understand that "knowing" someone isn't the same as "seeing" someone. I see lots of people day-to-day, but I know very few of them. After being friends with the MoMs (Moms of Multiples) for so long, I've learned that I know several of them better than I know most people I've ever met in-real-life. I've shared things with them that most people don't (and will never) know about me, and I'm sure they have as well. We've come together when others were in times of need and offered support however we could. The wealth of knowledge in the group spans from the expertise of stay-at-home moms to teachers to special-effects makeup artists (ok, so there's only one of those, but you get the idea). I love the diversity of opinions and ideas the group can generate, and I'm so grateful for the times they've been there when I needed them. I'm proud to call them my friends.

ONE

2012-07-14T00:00:00.000-05:00

It's official. They're one year old. WOW. Let me just say - it's been the most challenging, rewarding year of my life so far (and that includes the year I moved, got engaged, graduated college, started a new job, moved again, and got married). I'm going to do a little different post this time around, because well, today is really all about them.

L & Little C,

I can't believe you're already one year old. It's incredible to think that this time last year we met you for the first time after what felt like a lifetime of waiting to see your beautiful face. You tried to make your grand entrance more than once before the big day finally arrived, and I'm just grateful that you waited as long as you did. I can't imagine how different the last year would've been if you had been born at 27 weeks instead of 35.

Little C - Even after stalling delivery for 8 weeks after contractions started, you were still born with trouble breathing. You also had the cord wrapped around your neck, and your face and extremities were blue. They held you by my face for about 5 seconds before you were swept off to the NICU.

6lb 4oz 17.5" 7/14/11 9:54pm

Granted, our NICU experience was as smooth as could be expected and there are hundreds of preemie families who aren't nearly as lucky as we were. However, let's be clear - just because it wasn't as bad as it could've been doesn't change the fact that it was still far from easy. Your dad and I were worried to death because your doctors weren't sure if your dyspnea was a routine problem or if you had a serious disease. It was terrifying. I'll never forget the first time I held you in my arms. There were tubes and wires all over the place and you couldn't be out of the warmer for very long, but it was still one of the most exciting, gratifying 5 minutes of my life. You never opened your eyes, but you snuggled your head into my chest and sighed the most content sound in the world. I was smitten.

We were addicted to you immediately.

Your dad got to hold you the next day, and it was such a feeling of complete bliss and peace to have both of our boys together again and finally be united as a family of four. We were in the hospital until Monday, July 18 and were all discharged on the same day. I was so grateful that you did well and we got to leave the hospital as a family. That was a blessing I prayed for long before you were born and have said thanks for many times since.

L - You were our 5lb 8.5oz trooper. You screamed from the minute you came out and stopped only when your dad held you for the first time.

5lb 8.5oz 17.5" 7/14/11 9:56pm

You were smaller than I'd expected, and I couldn't believe how much you looked like my dad. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to tell a difference between you and your brother, but it was all in vain. You've never resembled each other to me or your dad. I've always thought you looked just like my baby pictures and your Papa Mitch, and your brother has always looked like a tiny version of your dad. Regardless, you were both more beautiful than I ever could've imagined. You got to meet all of your grandparents a few hours after you were born, and I'm sure you can imagine how popular you were with them!

They couldn't take their eyes off you, and in all fairness, who could blame them?

You were snuggly from the very beginning and loved to lay on my chest and sleep. We sent you to the nursery at night so we could try to rest. Sleep was difficult to come by between routine vital checks and post surgery pain/discomfort, but we thought it would be easier to rest in the hospital than once we took you home (and we were right). Your first few days were pretty uneventful, but you did lose quite a bit of weight and only weighed 4lb 7oz when we went home. You were (and still are) the smallest baby I've ever held. It felt like holding a blanket that had been wadded up because you were always swaddled tightly and were so light that it was difficult to tell that a baby was snuggled inside all that fabric!

The first 36 hours of your lives are mostly a blur for me now, and I'm grateful to have written everything down in my pregnancy/delivery journal and to have so many pictures because I wouldn't be able to recall nearly all of the details of those first few days.

I am so amazed by how much you've both grown and changed in the last year. I'm still not sure how it happened, though, because I've seen you every single day of your lives and never did I think "They look different today." I just can't believe that you grew from such tiny, helpless infants into these independent toddlers right in front of me.

From tiny, swaddled newborns...

...To opinionated, independent toddlers!

Your dad and I have been beyond blessed, and I can't believe we are the lucky two who get to be your parents. We love you so much more than any words can convey, and I now understand why my parents said I would get it when I had kids of my own. Honestly, the only way to understand the magnitude of a love like this is to experience it for yourself. It can't be explained or reasoned or understood. It must be felt first-hand before you can truly appreciate it. One day, a long, long time from now, you'll both know exactly what I mean.

It's been so much fun to watch you reach milestone after milestone and soak up everything around you like a sponge. You're learning so much every single day, and I hope I'm teaching you well. This has been the most incredible year, and I can't wait (except that I absolutely can - please don't grow up faster than you have to!) to see how different each of you are in another 365 days.

I love you both so, so much,
Mom

Real talk.

2012-07-02T12:34:00.004-05:00

Truth.

I'm not usually one for politics, but this was too perfect.

July. Holy mess.

2012-07-02T11:04:00.002-05:00

Not sure if anyone else has noticed or not, but it's officially July. Holy mess. I'm sure this is just another month for most people, but for me, it means that it's only 12 (TWELVE!!) days until the boys' first birthday. How has this happened already?! There were so many things I wanted to get done before their first birthday... For example, I wanted to have the boys' first year photo album close to finished. (That's going to be particularly difficult considering the fact that I haven't even STARTED on them yet.) It's baffling how fast 50 weeks have gone by. I can't even explain how stunning it is. It's like I've seen a unicorn dance across a rainbow to steal a Leprechaun's pot of gold. Ridiculous, I know, but it's still happening.

Am I going to be able to get everything together before the big 1 party? We'll see... I need to order a cake, grocery shop for party food, send invitations, and 100 other things that I've been putting off because it just makes it all too real. Unfortunately, I've learned that time blazes past whether you're ready for it to or not, and I'm trying to enjoy the present rather than be sad that so much has already passed. Although, I would kill for a little time-in-a-bottle right now so I could savor these last few days of baby-hood a little bit longer before they become toddlers.

And of course, a picture for your viewing pleasure...

L & Little C sporting their Old Navy big-boy polos!

He's a walker!!

2012-06-14T12:07:00.000-05:00

Ohhhh goodness. L took his first steps on April 30 when he was only 9 months old, and he's done nothing but improve on those first uncertain, wobbly efforts since then. He's all over the place now, and it's getting difficult to keep up. I think we've officially entered toddler-hood :|

The essence of Bittersweet

2012-06-06T13:53:00.002-05:00

The word "bittersweet" was invented by a mother. She looked at her children and thought "my babies are growing up." I know this because it happened to me. L keeps taking steps, and Little C has started standing unassisted. It's incredibly sad and so exciting. I've never felt so torn about anything in my life.

Yesterday, we were playing in the floor and my step-mom said "do you see him??" which prompted me to move so I could. Much to my dismay, I looked and saw L STANDING on the handle of our recliner. STANDING. He held the armrest for leverage and climbed up until he was standing on the handle and his shoulders were even with the armrest. I was stunned. And of course, mother-of-the-year that I am, I grabbed the camera to catch a picture before I got him down. Can't lose moments like that ;)

On the way home from church this week, the boys were in the middle of an intense jabbering discussion peppered with high-pitched squeals. I was laughing to myself when it became almost silent in the back seat. I turned back to look, and this is what I saw:

Precious doesn't even begin to cover it. I think I actually felt my heart start melting. They rarely have "time" to be sweet and cuddly lately - there are 500 things they would rather do instead.

When did my sweet, snuggly infants turn into too-busy-to-be-held almost-toddlers?? And why wasn't there more of a transition stage? I swear just last week they still wanted to be held and loved on, and now, it's a wrestling match just to get to kiss them on their sweet little heads. I feel like I've missed so much of their first 10 months even though I've seen them every day since they were born. Maybe I'm just sentimental today, or maybe I'm finally realizing that their first birthday is coming like a freight-train and I'm powerless to slow it down.

I guess what I'm trying to say is this: I miss my tiny, 5lb infants and the precious baby snuggles so much, but I wouldn't trade what we have now for anything in the world. It's so very sad to know they've already changed so much yet so exciting to watch them grow and learn. Bittersweet in the truest sense of the word.

Sew So Fab

2012-04-02T11:19:00.001-05:00

Alright.. remember that post a few weeks ago about accepting money from strangers? Well, you guys didn't exactly come through for me, so we proceeded with the small business plan and Sew So Fab was born. We specialize in baby accessories including car seat canopies, crinkle tagalongs, and nursing covers. We have several more items in our inventory, but you get the idea.

I've been working on marketing ideas, but so far I've only had time to create a page on Facebook. I'll get better things in the works soon, but until then, get over there and "like" us. You know your curiosity is killing you. Get over there. Do it. Now.

I'm really hoping this goes well and is as lucrative as I'm expecting. It feels like a good idea, and I have confidence that it could be very successful. It's just a matter of getting publicity and spreading the word that we're open and building a customer base. It sounds so simple when put like that. Unfortunately, it is much easier said than done. If anyone has any great marketing tips (or any other constructive criticism for that matter), I'd love to hear them!

Ryan Gosling

2012-03-31T10:57:00.000-05:00

Because my 24-year-old best friend just won her battle with colon cancer. She's my newest hero.

Little C is CRAWLING!!

2012-03-16T11:25:00.000-05:00

Little C is officially a CRAWLER!! He tried for weeks and had multiple bruises and one bloody nose to show for his efforts before finally having his first taste of success.

I can't believe my house is no longer home to any immobile babies. Fairly certain they'll be picking out their first vehicles next month. I do have to say though, that as heartbreaking as it is to watch my tiny infants morphing into toddlers, it's probably the sweetest thing in the world when they crawl to me to be held. I'm so very smitten.

Quit your day job??

2012-03-02T17:27:00.000-06:00

I'm starting a small business. Actually, small business might be a little ambitious. I'm going to be making baby-related clothes and other accessories for the most part, but I'm also going to have items that I've made as crafts in the past. i.e. padded camera strap covers. I would LOVE to quit my day job and be a stay-at-home-mom, but I don't think we could afford it unless I develop some kind of lucrative hobby. That being said, our top contenders are:

1. Photography

2. Selling baby crap

3. Accepting money from strangers.

While #1 would likely be the most fun, I just don't have the confidence to do it yet. I LOVE to take pictures and have done a couple different shoots for fun, but it's crazy expensive and I would need a couple more items in my photog bag and more pics in my portfolio before being comfortable charging people for it.

Selling baby crap is probably the wisest choice here. Let's face it - Moms are suckers and can't help but buy all of the cutesy, precious baby things they come across. Trust me. I'm guilty of it too. Now, here's the idea - Moms are going to be making these purchases anyway, so I'm going to sell my unique items cheaper than where similar things can be bought other places. They can buy from me, save a little money, make me some money... Everybody wins.

Obviously, option #3 is my preference. I really want to give this idea the consideration it deserves, so if you've got a PayPal account or a credit card, feel free to contact me to help put my kids through college. They will appreciate not having to attend Mom's Makeshift University in 17.5 years (we're still waiting on our accreditation; it seems to be taking longer than expected).

I believe you guys can make it happen; however, I'm not exactly putting all my eggs in the #3 basket, so the plan for now is to give #2 a go and let's just see where we land.

I've got the ball rolling, but I'm not comfortable going all out with PR until I'm ready to actually make some sales and fill orders. I don't want my first few customers to get poor service (or worse, subpar items) because I jumped the gun. I'm waiting until things are 100% ready before I dive in head-first. I want customers to be completely satisfied, and I just don't think I'm in a place where that can happen just yet. I think people would be about 80% satisfied, and well, that's not good enough. I'll be getting back to you on this though; don't worry about that!

In other news, Little C is trying to crawl. If he figures it out, I'm screwed.

Vacation.

2012-02-16T19:28:00.000-06:00

Big C and I went to Branson for the night last Friday. It. Was. Wonderful.

This is the first time that we have gone away for a night since the boys were born. They've stayed with grandparents several times, but never have we been more than 5 minutes away from them overnight.

It went a lot smoother than I expected, and it was also the world's shortest vacation. We were gone for roughly 28 hours. And couldn't have been happier to get home to those little boys.

Having babies really does change you - in the most wonderful, unexpected ways.

Excellent.

2012-02-10T20:58:00.000-06:00

You haven't really lived until you've poured vomit out of your bra.

You read that right. Little C wasn't feeling well (apparently) earlier this week. I had just gotten home from work and commenced the bed time countdown. I rocked and fed L without protest or any exciting event. After putting L in bed, I then scooped my other sweet boy up and snuggled him close to my chest because I hadn't seen him all day. We had been sitting down for 2.5 seconds when the explosion occured.

Now, I don't care how much you love your kids or how wonderful you think they are; vomit is vomit. And I was covered in it. When I stood up, it poured out of my lap like a small waterfall. Somehow that sound is only beautiful if you're standing by a rippling stream and looking at a tall, tall cliff watching water cascade in a wonderous white mist. If you're holding your 6 month old child and standing from your glider, it is a disgusting sound.

Tomorrow will be better. It has to.

That's enough Father Time

2012-02-05T16:15:00.001-06:00

Alright, Father Time. You can ease up any day now. We muddled through the difficulties of the I'm-so-tired-I-can't-remember-if-I-ate-lunch-or-not era and are into the I-never-knew-saying-"boo"-could-be-so-funny stage. Let's slow it down just a little so we've got time to enjoy this!

L smiled at me this morning, and I'm sure it took him by surprise when I pried his mouth open to prove to myself that I was seeing things and he didn't actually have two tiny teeth in his little bitty mouth. Wrong. There they were. Bright, shiny, and barely through his sweet little gums right in the front on the bottom. My baby has two teeth. How did this happen??! I wasn't sad when Little C popped his first tooth through because I still had one baby who wasn't growing up quite as fast. Now, there are no more toothless babies in my house (and might never be again, we're undecided), and this is just too sad for words. Don't get me wrong though; I am excited about those tiny little teeth! They're undoubtedly two of the cutest teeth I've ever seen, as expected.

It's all exciting when the first one reaches milestones because I don't get caught up in the fact that this might be the last "first" we get to have. Take Lucas crawling for example: I am SO excited and proud of that sweet little baby!! And it's easy to be excited because his *older* brother is still happily rolling around my living room and showing no interest in crawling or growing up too fast and breaking his Momma's heart. Now when Little C starts crawling, after the excitement of his newest achievement calms down, I'm sure I will have to mourn the fact that my house will no longer be home to tiny infant babies but busy, busy crawlers instead.

I thought time was flying by when I was in college, but I had no idea. Time is screeching past at an appalling pace these days. I would give anything for a little time in a bottle right now. It would be so nice to go back to those first few days at home with my snuggly little boys for just a few minutes. To hold my teeny 5lb babies and let them fall asleep on my chest one more time. I guess the nostalgia makes me appreciate the moments now even more, but still. I can't believe it's been nearly seven months. Hope the second half of their first year of life goes by just a little more slowly.

P.S...

Happy Super Bowl Sunday from L & Little C!!

Face mask. 15 yard penalty. Automatic first down!!

And we're off!!

2012-02-04T07:55:00.001-06:00

Holy crap. He's mobile.

I know what you're thinking, and yes, it is one of the cutest things ever. In addition to cute, it is also sad beyond words and terrifying. I thought it was getting difficult to keep up with two boys as is, but now I feel like life is one big game of Frogger... and we're a hop and a skip away from game over.

It's about to get really interesting at our house. Just wait till he teaches his Little C how to do it. We're in trouble, yo.

Big and Little C

2012-02-03T07:35:00.000-06:00

It occurred to me, after reading a previous post, that I should probably distinguish between C the husband, and C the child. Let's be clear -- I'm not the person who lets an adult scream at her for an extended period of time (or likely any period of time). Obviously, the screaming C from the Baby Ambien post is Little C. By modifying this moniker, C the husband naturally becomes "Big C."

This is only a default reference to his size since he is obviously bigger than a 14lb infant - Big C is not a large man. Just wanted to get everyone on the same page.

Now... last night was quite the comedy of events. I don't know how many of you have (or have had) babies, but I once read that putting a baby down for bed is a lot less like the Pampers commercials and a lot more like wrestling a 20lb bag of snakes. I'd have to agree. The boys are big enough now that they are much too busy to be bothered with cleaning/changing of any sort. If we only knew how many things they needed to do, surely we would understand their plight.

To complicate matters, our boys have recently learned that their head is a powerful tool when they want to move. L can turn his head and somehow harness the momentum and flip his entire body in roughly two seconds. He employed this technique repeatedly while Big C was getting him ready for bed. Now, the video is only a few seconds long, but don't be fooled. This battle royale commenced for about 10 minutes.

Pretty sure they were both sweating by the time L actually had a dry diaper, clean pajamas, full belly, and was laid down for the night. I know I was, but it was probably from laughing till I couldn't breathe.

The things you'll see

2012-02-01T08:41:00.000-06:00

If you're searching for the Mother of the Year trophy, look no further. It's proudly displayed above my television for all the world to see. What have I done to deserve this prestigious award? Well, I'll tell you.

Those of you with small children may be familiar with a fairly new product called a "Bumbo." It is essentially a little seat that is used to support and help babies sit up until they are strong enough to sit up on their own. We use the Bumbos for a lot of things - eating vegetables, playing with toys, watching me fix dinner, etc. The boys really do like the perspective that comes from looking at the world head on rather than looking up at it from their back. Because they enjoy the seats so much, I often let them continue to sit and play with one another while I wash dishes or clean the living room.

Earlier this week, like many mornings before, I was feeding the boys some breakfast in the Bumbos, and they had quickly dismissed me and began talking and playing with each other. (You see, I am the only thing that matters when they need something, but if anything more interesting comes along, i.e. something shiny, I no longer exist to them.) I've been trying for weeks to get a video of them chatting, so instead of going to clean and put our breakfast supplies away, I grabbed my trusty iPhone and recorded away. These tiny baby geniuses can always tell when I'm trying to catch them doing something - a skill that will serve them well in years to come, I'm sure - so of course they immediately stopped the incessant babbling. I decided to continue recording in hopes of catching them talking again once they got distracted and forgot about the camera pointing at them.

In my defense, and those of you with iPhones can vouch for me, when using the video feature of this handy device, it automatically zooms in a little. Now, typically "a little" isn't enough to make a difference one way or the other, but when you're sitting less than 18" from your subject, "a little" zoom is enough to miss everything you're trying to record. Because of the zoom factor, I had to lean back (can't get up, remember, trying to be inconspicuous here) to make sure both boys were in the frame. This put me in a rather awkward position, so instead of actually watching the video or the boys, I was trying not to fall and thus ruin the moment. Guess I should've written a memo to L... "Don't ruin it. I'm trying to show people how cute you are. Love, Mom"

You can watch the video for yourself and see how this story plays out.

He is fine, by the way, and thanks for asking. And yes, I felt awful; however, my guilt probably stems from the fact that I found humor in the situation, but come on now, let's be honest. You laughed too.

Baby Ambien

2012-01-26T10:18:00.002-06:00

Why is the donut box always so hard to close? Regardless of how careful I am, the cardboard always gets caught on the edge and results in 2-3 attempts before it actually closes correctly. What gives? I mean, seriously, come on. I'm already ashamed; can't we just make this quick and dirty? Do you really have to drag it out and further amplify my guilt for caving to the sweet, sweet temptress that is this delicious pastry? I blame the boys for this. I never had donut-box-lid issues before them. I never even like donuts before the belly critters made me a slave to their every craving. Now I'm hooked. Thanks kids.

On to more important things... C screamed at me for over an hour yesterday. Why you may ask; I still don't know. I finally gave up and we got in the car and went to town (because that's what you do when you've exhausted every plausible option that won't result in a visit from DCFS - go to a public place so strangers can judge you for the fact that you can't calm your own child). We'd been in the car for 1.5 seconds when the screaming stopped. Thank you sweet Lord. Why didn't I do this an hour ago? Sometimes in the blur of the moment, I forget that the carseats are like little baby Ambien. I'm not sure why I EVER forget this. It's one of the most important lessons I've learned so far.

Notice to all expectant parents: Carseats rock. Inconsolable baby? Strap it in and pick the seat up. Most of the time you don't even have to go anywhere. Just trick the screaming banshee into thinking that you're going somewhere, and suddenly they are on their best behavior. Kids learn early on to make their parents look like liars at every given opportunity.

Parent: "I hope he wasn't too bad for you. He cried all morning long at home!"
Babysitter: "Really? He's been wonderful since you dropped him off."

Little assholes. I swear they thrive on a chance to make me sound like I'm just a big whiner. I'm not kidding here folks. You'll learn. And for those of you who already have kids, well, you already get it and didn't think I was joking to begin with.

I told you. Baby Ambien.

Still C.

2012-01-22T18:49:00.000-06:00

Last night I announced my dive into the blog world to C, which typically would have been something that he wouldn't particularly care about (outside of the "you're-my-wife-so-I-have-to-care" sense). I asked if he wanted to read it, to which he replied "Do you want me to read it?" Now, this could have been the point where I yelled "I want you to WANT to read it!" (Jennifer Aniston in The Break Up - "I want you to WANT to do dishes!" style). Alas, I kept my cool and said "No, it's not a big deal." Then I casually mentioned that I told the world nice things about him. Consider his interest peaked.

As a general rule, I hate for people to read things that I have written. Why, you may ask, have I chosen to write a blog that is available for anyone fortunate enough to have an internet connection to find and peruse and judge at will? Ha.. Wish I had an answer for you. Maybe I miss my college writing classes (Hi Dr. Ball!) or maybe I enjoy pretending that anyone really cares what I have to say. It's basically impossible to know for sure. I'm just hoping the comments aren't too harsh and hateful. And if they are, well, I have the power to delete them. Touche.

Back to last night... Once C knew he was mentioned in the ever-living internet world, he suddenly wanted to read the blog I spoke of. (Side note - I struggle to say the word "blog" and keep a straight face. It just sounds ridiculous in my head, much less when actually spoken aloud. Blog. I just can't get past it.) I gave him my phone and proceeded to bury my face under my pillow and wait for his likely-ornery response. It went a little something like this:

C: Why am I "C?"

Me: Well, I didn't know if you'd be ok with me broadcasting your name across the internet. I'm respecting your privacy.

C: Don't!!

Me: What? Are you crazy?

C: Don't! Tell them my whole name! Even use my middle initial.. I want everyone to know how nice I am.

Me: What? Seriously?!

C: TELL THEM MY NAME!

Not exactly the reaction I was expecting, but nonetheless, my first feedback was positive (read "positive" as "not negative, so let's call it a win"). And I've decided he will remain C. Partly because I do want to maintain some degree of privacy. Mostly because I can. I told you he's nicer than me.

Bloginity Lost

2012-01-21T16:34:00.000-06:00

I knew you were all dying to learn exactly how we manage to make it from sun-up to sun-down - most days even include a shower - while defending ourselves against the relentless demands of our two tiny children,and thus the Blog was born. Calm down, calm down. While I will be revealing some trade secrets, I can't tell you everything or you would cease to be so impressed by the fact that most days I don't look like I've fallen off the too-exhausted-to-speak wagon *insert sarcasm here*.

Most of you know me or know someone who knows me, but let's assume for a second that you don't; for starters, why are you here and how did you find this blog? Are you creepy, stalker types? Or are you bored and innocently stumbled over it? Regardless, glad to have you :) Little background for ya... My husband and I have been married for a little over two years. We met in high school and dated for five years before we got married. I graduated with a bachelor's degree in May 2009 and tied the proverbial knot in August the same year. C really is my best friend in the world and I count myself unbelievably lucky and blessed to be his wife. He is much nicer and more patient and understanding than I am, and unfortunately, that makes me the undesirable in the relationship. So here we are...

Wonderful & Undesirable

We'd been submerged in happily-married-bliss for a little over a year and had just decided to wait another year or so to procreate when we found out we were going to have a baby *insert stunned faces here*. Fast forward three weeks to the day we found out two little belly critters were on the way instead of just one *insert permanently stunned faces here*. L&C made their grand entrance on Thursday July 14, 2011, and well, cliche or not, life hasn't been the same since!

There really are two of them. Look out world.

It's quite the roller coaster, and they're already plotting against us (I can see it in their eyes - trust me). I'm sure this journey is only going to get more interesting and entertaining, so stay tuned ;)

You don't even have to say it. I already know. And you're welcome.