“NO SHAKY LEG!!!” reminds me of the time my cousin, when she was 7 years old, told me her HAM told her that shaking your leg at the table meant you were a slut. Or, in the words of this vid, someone who goes out “every day tryna have the sex.”

[JustKiddingFilms on YouTube]

The victim was robbed and treated for a laceration to his lip, bruising, and abrasions, according to WaPo.

The Chicago police have ruled out that the assault was racially motivated–you can hear the perpetrators calling the victim the N-word throughout–while the Internet police on various forums have corroborated that notion by publishing the perpetrators’ names, addresses, phone numbers, Facebook pages–even their parents’ names–since the video surfaced. At least 4 of the 6 assailants are also Asian American (Chinese, to be specific, judging by their names).

Now comes these two videos, uploaded by a female friend [commenters on various sites have claimed she's the one who filmed the attack but that can't be verified--Ed.] of the assailants, who contends that the 6 on 1 attack was “payback” for another attack in which either the victim or the victim’s friends took part as perpetrator(s). Apparently all of these kids know one another and belong to different Asian cliques in the same community (the Fobs–Fresh of the Boats–are one group and the other doesn’t appear to have a name), in what seems like a plot lifted from an S.E. Hinton novel. The girl who made the following two videos contends that there’s been a back-and-forth of violence between these two groups and the 6 assailants were “attacked first.”

Chicago Police Superintendent Garry McCarthy has confirmed what this girl is saying, that the 6 (or 7) on 1 was in retaliation for a 20 on 2 attack. Which doesn’t lessen the horror of what we’ve witnessed in the video but should serve as a reminder of how violence begets violence and quickly spins out of control.

Though you wouldn’t know that judging by the reaction to the video online, where the addresses of the attackers have been published, where one commenter on YouTube has listed the numbers of the assailants and written, “BEAT THE FUCK OUT OF THEM ALL,” while on a Facebook page originally created to support the victim, another commenter’s called on the perpetrators to be “killed” and to die a “painfull (sic) death.”

Bravo, humanity.

[WaPo: Chicago police question 6 teens in beating of teenager that was filmed, posted online]

[UPDATE: The 7 teens involved in the beating have been arrested. Two 16 year-old boys, three fifteen year-old boys, and one 15 year-old girl, who filmed the attack, were charged with robbery and aggravated battery. One 17 year-old, Raymond Palomino, whose face is uncovered in the video, is being charged as an adult.]

Thanks, Nick and @mikeycho

What do you think, Asian Girls? Does this shit sound familiar? Reply below in the comments section!

Thanks, Kenny!

All the way with George Takei! Our favorite Star Trek cast member (original flava, of course) is going to be on the next season of “Celebrity Apprentice.” [Crushable]

This produce packs a punch! Manny “Pac-Man” Pacquiao now has his own line of vegetables called, fittingly, Pacquiao Produce. [YouTube]

Congratulations, Matthew Fox! You’re the latest White dude to save Japan on the big screen. We’ll be sending you a floral arrangement in the shape of Tom Cruise’s character from The Last Samurai. [Movieline]

The Japanese National Tourism Organization really wanted to fly 10,000 folks to Japan for free, but, alas, they cannot. [The Savvy Stews]

Our dreams of being Twitter besties with the one and only Wendi “Mrs. Rupert Murdoch” Deng have been dashed. The Twitter account @wendi_deng, which took Twitter by storm a few days ago was run by an imposter.[Gawker]

TWIN BABY POLAR BEARS!!! [The Awl]

So, basically, if you speak Chinese, look Chinese, have ever had an interest in the world around you, adopted a child from Asia, or even just held an Asian baby in your arms…you’re un-American. (Not to mention how you love you some of that chinky flute music!)

Huntsman and his Communist albeit adorable daughter Gracie Mei

And Ron Paul and his supporters wonder why everyone thinks he’s racist.

[via Gawker]

[HuffPo: Jon Huntsman Denounces Nasty, Jingoistic Video Allegedly Made By Ron Paul Supporters (VIDEO)]

Of course, I hope this was all a show for the North Korean media and that everyone went home and secretly did a happy dance, but even with Kim Jong-il gone, it doesn’t seem that life’s going to get better for North Koreans any time soon.

[msnbc.com: Mourning in North Korea, worries in South]

The chicken sandwiches are still tasty, so I’m told, but everything else about the company has become increasingly unpalatable. The company actively hates gays and gay marriage, donating nearly $2 million to anti-gay groups in 2009. It’s also no friend to the little guy. The company’s currently suing Bo Muller-Moore, a Vermont folk artist, for trademark infringement because Muller-Moore has been selling t-shirts since 2000 that say “Eat More Kale,” which Chick-fil-A contends too closely resembles its intentionally-misspelled trademark “Eat Mor Chikin.”

And now this: on a recent trip to the Irvine, CA Chick-fil-A location, two Asian students were rung up as “Ching” and “Chong” by a “team member” named Lia.

An argument could be made that this was only an isolated act of prejudice made by one Chick-fil-A employee, but the fact is, Chick-fil-A is renowned for rigorously vetting its employees so that hires reflect the company’s “values.” Forbes reported in 2007 that a training manager for the chain went through 17 job interviews before he was hired, and this was only after he was rejected a first time, after 7 interviews. Chick-fil-A founder S. Truett Cathy said in the same profile:

“You don’t have to be a Christian to work at Chick-fil-A, but we ask you to base your business on biblical principles because they work.”

So if Lia is the kind of employee Chick-fil-A believes reflects its own principles, then it’s safe to say that the only thing the chicken joint’s serving up these days is a big, fat, juicy bullshit sandwich.

[via Angry Asian Man]

UPDATE: Chick-fil-A’s issued a statement addressing this incident and confirming that Lia’s been fired. In the statement, the company chalks up their ex-employee’s behavior to “immaturity, failed judgment, and human error.” The company maintained that it still hates gays, however, but will continue to be happy to serve them in their restaurants.*

*The last part of this statement was not actually made by the company, though it’s presumed true.

Ever see a geisha with her boobs pushed up under her chin? Didn't think so

Only problem is, the Vivienne Westwood-designed gown Perry wore has nothing to do with geishas, and was actually “inspired” by a Chinese flower painting. The calligraphy on the dress Perry wore is Chinese, not Japanese. The dress is from Westwood’s Spring 2012 Gold Label collection, which drew from “Chinese calligraphy, Mao jackets, Berber dress, and 17th century corsets as influences.”

This isn’t the first time Katy Perry wore something Asian-looking that writers lazily labeled “geisha.” Back in August, Perry attended the VMAs carrying a parasol, dressed in an Atelier Versace cheongsam mini, which was also dubbed “geisha-inspired.” The cheongsam, however, is Chinese. Perry’s look was lifted directly from 1920′s-30′s Shanghai, a look immortalized later in the 20th century by home decor posters printed from vintage Chinese ads:

So, what, any women’s garb with Asian references is “geisha”? Or is it that even all Asian dresses–like people–look alike?

[Celebuzz: Katy Perry Rocks Cleavage in Geisha-Inspired Gown at AMAs]

Jesus Fuck. This is actually too boring to be offensive. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: you can’t have a school rivalry when your football has become so sub-par. Harvard, Yale (my alma mater)…does anyone really think there’s a difference? We’re all the same kind of asshole. (Except for the person who actually buys the Occupy Yale shirt. S/he is a MUCH bigger asshole.)

When measuring Ivy League dick, I much prefer this shirt, by men’s designer Mark McNairy:

[Gawker: Worst Harvard-Yale Merchandise Ever: "We Are the 6%"]

I know, I know. It’s just a clothing line! Lighten up! And it’s so kawaii as the ads keep telling me, forcing the word on me like a pacifier to the lips of a crying, reluctant babe. (Wouldn’t be surprised if Gwen Stefani had tried to trademark the Japanese word for “cute” some time in the last 5 years or so. She’s already pretty much got “Harajuku”–the name of a Tokyo neighborhood–locked down legally.) And look, the Harajuku Mini for Target children’s clothes collection, which launches Sunday online and in stores, is “kawaii,” in a “What if a little panda cub who was part skater-punk threw up and it looked like lollipops and rainbows?” sorta way.

But, you know, I can forgive, but I can’t forget. Wait, who am I kidding? I can’t forgive either! Because when I see this ad plugging Gwen Stefani’s latest business venture…

…all I see is this:

And that is still, always, and forever whatever the Japanese word for “bullshit” is.

[The Stir: Gwen Stefani Harajuku Mini Arrives in Target Sunday!]