Zombies Everywhere

D.C. Targets Fake Weed With Zombie Campaign

2013-05-10T08:00:00.000-07:00

The D.C. Health Department has launched an interactive zombie-themed campaign and website to warn about the dangers of various forms of synthetic marijuana.

According to a statement from the department, the average age of synthetic marijuana users is 13.
“Recent focus group findings in partnership with DOH and local youth-based organizations indicate that synthetic marijuana is seen as an alternative to marijuana, as a result of its cheap cost and ability to go undetected in routine drug testing,” the statement reads.

It looks like marijuana and it's marketed with names like Spice, K2, Scooby Doo and Dopey Dwarf.

A 2011 survey released by the National Institute on Drug Abuse found that one in nine high school seniors had used Spice or K2. Synthetic marijuana is the second most commonly used illicit drug, after marijuana, among high school seniors, according to the DOH statement.

Nura Green works with the Health Department-funded D.C. Prevention Center.

"These are chemicals that are sprayed on some kind of plant product, you never know what the level of chemical you're going to get," Green says.

The synthetic drug claims to be potpourri or room incense, not for human consumption. But it's sold and smoked around the area.
Side effects can include dizziness, chills, rapid heart rate, fainting, coma, vomiting and even stroke, blood clots, loss of body movement and motor skills, brain damage and blindness, the DOH says.

One man told ABC7 he's joined the campaign against it.
"I felt my heart was gone bust," he says.

He says a lot of people under court supervision use it.
"It gets you high a little bit and it don't show up in your urinalysis when you take your urine, so what's why they're doing it."

The health department says the marketers are targeting young people, so it is too.

"It's a public health crisis," Green says "What we're trying to do is stop it before it becomes an epidemic."

stick with the real stuff

Fleshed Out: A Zombie Musical

2013-05-08T08:00:00.001-07:00

Two zombies crawl across a stage and bite into their grandmother’s flesh.

“Children are blessings from above. They show you their wonder with their love, but that’s not what I’m feeling now,” the grandmother sings.

“Grandma-ma we love you still, but tonight is the night your guts will spill on the floor,” the zombies sing back.

This June, the zombie apocalypse is coming to Missoula with Ely Sheets’ play “Fleshed Out: A Zombie Musical.”

Sheets, who’s acting in, directing and producing “Fleshed Out,” is a graduating senior from Missoula and has been working on the play since 2010. Sheets has always had a love for musical theater and had already written a few zombie-themed songs when he decided to write “Fleshed Out.”

Sheets wanted to stay away from the cliché story about a group of people trying to survive, so he wrote the play as a horror comedy from the perspective of the zombies, who are just having a blast.
“It’s a straight barrage of ridiculousness,” Sheets said.

Although the deaths come quickly, the tone of the piece is peppy, funny and a little vulgar. In one of the scenes, a judge gets disemboweled and the zombies use her intestines as a jump rope. In another, four people waltz around the stage as they’re about to eat each other.

“It’s silly and you’ll laugh a lot,” Sheets said. “Any serious moment is tempered with being funny.”

Sheets is graduating with a degree in film studies, and his education at the University of Montana helped shape the play. He said most of film studies is learning about film theory and watching movies. When writing “Fleshed Out,” Sheets took philosophical ideas he learned in school and juxtaposed them with the zombie genre.

Sheets said the play is his biggest accomplishment so far. Although he writes a lot and has many ideas for different plays, this is his only big completed project. And when it was put on at the Crystal Theater during Halloween, it was well-received.

UM graduate John Bishop saw the play in October and recommends seeing it in June.

“’Fleshed Out’ is an interesting take on the pop culture popularity of zombies,” Bishop said. “The songs are brutal, yet humorous, and seamlessly allow the story to be told without missing a beat.”

After graduation, Sheets plans on moving to Minneapolis, home of the second-largest theater community in the nation. Sheets hopes to start out with a 9-to-5 desk job in the theater community and work his way up until his work is noticed. Ideally, Sheets’ goal is to get “Fleshed Out” into the Minneapolis Fringe Festival — which is like Sundance Film Festival for plays — with hopes of someone buying the play and putting it on in a theater.

If his play were to get picked up and put on by a bigger theater, Sheets would make some changes. He wants to get the audience more involved, with the zombies attacking audience members and fake blood and guts thrown everywhere.

Running at only an hour long, “Fleshed Out” is the perfect play for people who aren’t into traditional musical theater.
“It’s short and sweet,” Sheets said. “There are no lulls and there aren’t even acts or breaks.”

Sheets is also working on a graphic novel about a group of people with enhanced genetic anomalies. The characters include a man who lives an entire lifetime every time he blinks, a Manhattan socialite who has super strength as well as a drinking problem and many more. He’s also working on two other musicals — one about the Berkley Pit overflowing and another he describes as a love letter to his 15 years of working in retail.

“Fleshed Out” comes to the Crystal Theater on June 7 and 8. Tickets are $11 in advance and $15 the day of the show. For more information, visit the “Fleshed Out: A Zombie Musical” Facebook and Kickstarter pages.

“Who isn’t a fan of zombies and musicals nowadays?” Bishop said. “You get the aspect of flesh-eating, destruction-causing zombies and all the music break-out scenes of Glee. Then you get to see the zombies eat the cast members. Fox should really take notes.”

Zombie Worms Eat With Acid

2013-05-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

In a new study, the genus Osedax (sometimes nicknamed "zombie worm") has been found to use a bone-melting acid to consume the skeletons of water mammals. The mouthless, gutless worms excrete an acid that enables them to gain access to the nutrients inside of the bones. The research was conducted by the Scripps Institution of Oceanography, which part of the University of California, San Diego.

"The acid presumably allows the worms to release and absorb collagen and lipids that are trapped in bone," Martin Tresguerres, one of the researchers, said in a statement. "This model is remarkably similar to how mammals repair and remodel bone; however Osedax secrete acid to dissolve foreign bone and access nutrients."

Tresguerres explains that these bizarre worms use a "proton pump" to secrete acid on the bone, similar to how our kidneys process blood and urine functions. They typically feed on whale carcases, but have also been found to eat fish bones, which leads researchers to assume that they have been around longer than many modern day sea creatures.

However, since they do not have a mouth, the bone worms must rely on bacteria to help them process the nutrients. The research suggests that the bacteria may separate the organic compounds in the bone so that the worms can absorb some of it providing a symbiotic relationship.

"The Osedax symbiosis shows that nutrition is even more diverse than we imagined and our results are one step closer in untangling the special relationship between the worm and its bacteria," Scripps postdoctoral researcher Sigrid Katz said in a statement.

Zombie Comedy Goes Viral

2013-05-03T08:00:00.000-07:00

THE Go Goa Gone team have all the right reasons to rejoice. Within a week of going online, the film’s promo has reached more than two million views.

While the film’s zany look and presentation has caught some major attention, the zomcom (Zombie Comedy) feel has further managed to make inroads beyond the target audience. No wonder the makers are very pleased. Co-director Raj Nidimoru, of the popular Raj-Krishna DK directing duo, said: “We knew that we had a very cool trailer in hand. As a matter of fact, we have been itching to put it out there for a while now. However, we didn’t expect this kind of amazing and spontaneous response. This is fantabulous.”

Moreover, with the film’s promos yet to hit satellite channels, the team is thrilled with everything already in hand and is keeping fingers crossed for more. With Saif Ali Khan’s unique characterisation of a Russian mafioso finding much attention for itself, one waits to see what else is in store.

“Exactly my point”, exclaims Raj. “There is much more than what has been seen so far. There is a lot of context to the proceedings. With thumbs-up coming in, I am now very excited and looking forward to the film’s release.”

With just a little over a month remaining for Go Goa Gone, which is produced by Saif Ali Khan, Dinesh Vijan and Sunil Lulla, it is time for all involved to up the ante.

“However, before that the director duo, who have already won a number of brownie points with Shor In The City and 99, are settling down to the fact that a unique subject like this has been noticed.

“I was naturally quite anxious to see the kind of response Go Goa Gone would generate. Especially since we were unleashing something new on the public for the first time”, says Krishna, Raj’s partner in direction.

“A lot of time, effort and research have gone into making sure that we get every zombie right and every performance just perfect. I am quite thrilled already since what we have got so far is much more than we could have asked for.

“With youngsters Kunal Khemu, Vir Das, Anand Tiwari and Puja Gupta chilling out on the sandy beaches of Goa even as Saif brings on some chilling encounters while being on a killing spree, the zomcom is fast catching pace. Well, it only goes to show that the novelty of the subject is something that will appeal to a wide audience. Fingers crossed”, say Raj and Krishna in unison.

A comedy. A horror-thriller. An action-adventure. Go Goa Gone is all of these rolled into one; a unique combination of fear and funny makes this film a one-of-a-kind genre bender – a zombie comedy.

Hardik and Luv are two dopeheads who tag along to Goa with their best buddy, Bunny, on his business trip. Luv comes across a free-spirited girl, Luna, who casually invites them to an exclusive underground rave party on a remote island. The party is the brainchild of the macho Russian mafioso Boris, to launch the ultimate party drug. But something is not right on this island.

UK's First Zombie Wedding [Video]

2013-05-01T08:00:00.000-07:00

A couple dressed as the "undead" have tied the knot in what could be the UK's first zombie-themed wedding.

Horror fans Jennifer Jones and Rob Blackmore shuffled down the aisle after being transformed into flesh-eating creatures normally found in a Hollywood movie.

The couple, from Stockbridge, in Liverpool, were able to take part in their dream wedding after winning a competition to mark the release of new zombie game, Dead Island Riptide.

Warehouse assistant Rob, 31, said: "Ever since I was a child in the 1980s and saw my first zombie film, I was drawn to zombies.

"When technology grew and computer games came out, the first zombie game I played was Resident Evil. From there it just escalated and I became a huge fan. I've never played a zombie game I haven't liked."

Jennifer, 27, said: "My mum wasn't even surprised. Everyday is like Halloween for me. She loved the idea."

Asked whether she had ever dreamed of a white wedding, Jennifer replied: "It was never going to be like that. We wanted to get married on Halloween anyway so it was always going to be a spooky, creepy, weird wedding."

Google Glass Not Ready For Zombies

2013-04-29T08:00:00.000-07:00

Do you happen to be a member of the walking dead populace that inhabits this world, hoping to get your nasty blood-covered hands on Google Glass? Unfortunately for you and your friends, Google set the record straight last Friday, claiming Glass “isn’t quite ready for zombies yet.”

A zombie was on Google+ and decided to reach out to Google in an attempt to score a pair of fancy eye wear, claiming that there must be a huge market for the zombie population. In addition, he could then give Google a zombie’s perspective on Glass and everyone would be a winner. As it turns out, whoever runs the Glass G+ page is a good sport and played along nicely with the request.

Zombie Run in Athens

2013-04-26T08:00:00.000-07:00

One group in Athens is getting a little creative with their efforts to raise money for Relay for Life.

The 1343 chemical brigade sponsored a Zombie Fun Run last Saturday.

Organizer Sydney Williams says, "So we have the zombies and we have the runners. And the runners they have life flags and the life flags are what the zombies are after. So, the goal of the run is to complete the run without losing your life."

200 runners paid $30 each to participate. All of the money will go to the American Cancer Society.

Zombies may not be very smart, but they sure have big hearts.

Glasses for the Zombie Apocalypse

2013-04-24T08:00:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone! I'm pretty excited to tell you that you no longer have to worry about looking good during the zombie apocalypse. The good folks over at Firmoo got you covered with some FREE awesome glasses!

I already got myself a pair and while I don't wear prescription lenses, it's always fun to look good with some classic hipster glasses. Take it from me, it's time to trade in those old lenses you've had for years and get with the style of the day. It's also a given fact that we should have our eyes checked and glasses prescription updated once a year to reduce the risk of our eyesight deteriorating from using old prescription eyeglasses.

Sure going about getting glasses the normal way could take a big chunk of cash out of your funds. Funds that could go to making sure you have the essential supplies you need to survive a zombie apocalypse! You want to live right? Luckily for glasses wearers, Firmoo offers free repair and FREE glasses (frames + Lenses + Shipping = $0.00) along with offering discount coupons for future purchases.

Furthermore, if you are a first time customer at Firmoo, you can also get your first pair for free . Only pay a minimum $6.95 shipping fee.

But for those who missed the free pair, you still don't have to be discouraged because they have another limited time offer which will save you 20% off on frames + total shipping fee.

Take your time and enjoy your good luck at http://www.firmoo.com/z/crazy-giveaway.html

I am already enjoying mine comfortably and stylish on my face as I type this out, so why not enjoy a free pair for yourself today?

What You Need to Do Now to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse (Guest Post)

2013-04-22T08:00:00.000-07:00

There will not be any warning signs for the zombie apocalypse. We're not dealing with North Korea here: Zombies won't announce their intentions and make threats for years to come. Instead, you'll wake up one day and find a flesh eater climbing through your window trying to get to you and your family. What will you do in that moment?

Thinking about your escape plan or your strategy for survival isn't enough. You have to start preparing now for what life will be like in such an apocalyptic situation. Here are a few things you need to do now in order to survive the zombie apocalypse:

Get in Shape

If you can't run around the block now, how do you think you are going to run from hoards of zombies for days on end? Your future is nothing but walking and running and fighting and work. You need to be in the best shape you can be if you expect to make it. If you run out of breath or need to stop for a break, that could be the end.

Learn to Shoot

Most people have never even shot a gun, let alone know how to shoot it well. Zombies need a clean head shot to take them down. Scatter shot that lands on an arm here or a leg there isn't going to save you. You have to learn how to shoot now, and you have to learn how to shoot well. When the zombie apocalypse breaks out, you can't use that time to practice. Make sure you're ready when the show starts.

Start Gardening

Agriculture and industry are going to come to a halt when the zombie apocalypse begins. You won't be able to go to the grocery store and pick up what you need. You need to learn how to grow your own food so that you have a steady supply of nutrients. Scavenging for food will put you at risk of being attacked by a hoard.

Learn How to Start a Fire

The electricity won't be on when the world has turned into zombies. If you want to eat something besides raw brains, you need to learn to start a fire the old-fashioned way. If you didn't learn this in the Boy Scouts, it's time to learn it now.

Learn Basic Medical Care

A bite from a zombie is going to be fatal, but there are plenty of other injuries you're likely to sustain while you're running and jumping over things that you need to learn how to treat. Without proper care, these injuries could become infected and be fatal. Learn basic medical care, such as tending to wounds and administering CPR.

Whether it's zombies that come for us or something else that brings on an apocalyptic situation, you can't wait until it happens to start preparing. These are some of the basic skills you will need to survive the zombie apocalypse or any other severe emergency situation.

About the Author:

Bridget Sandorford is a freelance food and culinary writer, where recently she’s been researching the unlikely subject of gross food. In her spare time, she enjoys biking, painting and working on her first cookbook.

Zombie Fragrance: Killing the Ladies

2013-04-19T08:00:00.000-07:00

With near-constant signs that the end is near, it's oddly comforting to envision a tattered world in which the only thing that matters is the Zombie Apocalypse.

That's the backdrop for the new undead-inspired fragrances from Demeter. Zombie For Him and Her are designed to help the living fly under the radar of their reanimated enemies (and friends, let's be honest, you will have some annoying zombie pals). Fans of "Walking Dead" will no doubt recognize this tried-and-true strategy to avoid getting your brain eaten.

A press release from Demeter claims the product is "eminently wearable." That statement is, to put it charitably, untrue.

Zombie For Him smells a lot like the volcano exhibit at the New Mexico Museum of Natural History and Science.

For the incredibly high percentage of readers who find that description useless and obnoxious, let's let Demeter explain what the company thinks of its pungent product:

"Think forest floor. Zombie for Him is a combination of dried leaves, mushrooms, mildew, moss and earth."

Nevertheless, we're telling you, it smells just like the volcano exhibit.

Zombie for Her smells like grass, but not fresh smelling grass. It's more like the lawn clippings that have been sitting in trash bags for weeks because nobody wants to lug those things to the curb to be picked up. Demeter says there's also "dregs from the bottom of the wine barrel for a feminine touch."

What makes us most wary of the zombie fragrances is they may not actually fulfill their primary goal of saving people from death by getting eaten.

you smell so good

Teen Blames Zombies for Car Crash

2013-04-17T08:00:00.001-07:00

A man accused of stealing an articulated lorry and crashing it into several cars, injuring seven people, told police he was trying to flee ZOMBIES.

Jeremiah Hartline claims he swerved from side-to-side across the road in an attempt to shake off the living dead creatures clinging to the truck.

The 19-year-old allegedly stole the 18-wheeler lorry, carrying a load of strawberries, after hitching a ride with truck driver Daniel Martinez in Tennessee.

When the trucker got out of the vehicle at a weigh bridge, Hartline says he began to hallucinate that zombies were coming after him and accelerated onto the highway.

The teenager collided with several cars, causing a pile up which injured seven people, before flipping the big rig on its side, blocking the carriageway for three hours.

Two people were badly hurt in the crash, including a 19-year-old woman who remains in hospital after suffering a serious head injury and severed artery.

California Highway Patrol Office Nathan Baer said: “He was arrested at the crash scene and appeared to be in an altered state, claiming he was being chased by zombies.

“Hartline swerved the truck side to side to shake the zombies off."

Hartline, from Tennessee, pleaded not guilty to six offences, including assault with a deadly weapon.

He also denies reckless driving, vehicle theft, attempted vehicle theft, driving without a licence and involvement in a hit-and-run resulting in injury.

He is currently being held on $500,000 bail at the Southwest Detention Center in Murrieta, California.

Speaking of crashes

How Much is the Zombie Economy Worth?

2013-04-15T18:35:00.000-07:00

You may think they’re just flabby lumps of reanimated flesh, groaning indiscriminately and frightening villagers. But zombies are also supreme cash generators.

Their constant regurgitation in popular culture and wondrous things – like Wish.co.uk’s various zombie experiences – has sent the undead economy booming.

In fact, the zombie economy has been worth an astonishing $5.74 billion to the global economy over the past 4 years.

They’re all calling it (and by “they”, we mean “us”) the Putrid Pound. And and as more films, books, TV shows and fabulous zombie related experiences are created, the stronger it will become.

In fact, according to experts, by 2022 we’ll all be involved in a zombie related industry in one way or another. OK, we made that last fact up…

Become a Zombie-Killing Macgyver: From Neighborhoods to Traffic Zones

2013-04-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

Photo by Bob Jagendorf

During a zombie apocalypse, you'll not have time to prepare materials. You'll not have space to sit down and brainstorm a survival game plan. In a zombie apocalypse, you only have each passing moment and the opportunity given to you in order to survive. You must use your creativity, intuition, and improvisation to defend yourself against these walking creatures of the night. You're the zombie killing-MacGyver from Earth! Here are various scenarios along with makeshift zombie weapons you can use to distract, slow down or destroy those nasty zombie dudes in the blink of an eye!

On the City Streets

Around construction zones, you may notice security barrier poles to disrupt traffic. If you come across a set of these bad boys on the street, you can use the poles as your bread and butter of zombie protection. If they're installed in the right spots, you can use them to stand behind and trick them as they try to approach you. One after another. “CRACK!” as their deteriorating skulls crumble into black zombie goo. Bet you never thought construction materials would help fend creatures of the night, eh?

Outside of Your Home

If zombies approach you near your home, don't fear. There's a multitude of makeshift ways to fight them. First, look for anything out of the ordinary that could make an easy weapon. A garden hose with the water turned on full-blast will show these dead creeps that you mean business as you can quickly spray them in the eyes to mask their view. If a hose isn't in clear view, see if there are any large rocks in the vicinity. Stone throwing may be one of the most basic, primal forms of defense, but it can surely do some damage. Last but not least, lead them toward your home, and use your front door to whack them away as they approach. Let them know that zombies are simply not welcome!

In the Subway

If you're thinking of taking heed down below in the subways, just be aware that, during a zombie apocalypse, the subway system will be roaming with zombies! This doesn't mean, however, that you have no chance for survival in the subway. For non-obvious makeshift subway weapons, look for any leaflets, travel brochures or subway guides, and use their sharp edges to give paper cuts to any zombies you see. Paper cuts on their eyes and mouth will distract them the most, and buy time to escape. Another subway weapon is to use trash cans to hit the zombies over the head with. You can also cover their heads with it so they can't see where they're going. Opportunities for creative weapons in the subway is endless — just use your imagination!

Other environments such as the inside of stores will usually contain a wide variety of materials that can hurt zombies. From motorcycle parts to jugs of orange juice, finding something to throw isn't a challenge. The main thing is to be fast on your feet and keep your eyes open like you've never kept them open before. Every second counts! If 50 zombies enter a convenient store, they could easily take you down in a matter of seconds. Avoid having it get to that point by finding crafty ways to distract, confuse and kick zombie butt!

How Mass Media Enable the Zombie Apocalypse

2013-04-10T08:00:00.000-07:00

Zombies dominate our nation’s airwaves. They have already devoured much of our rational public discourse and now threaten our social sanity. Zombies are hot commodities. They sell. That’s why they cannot be stopped or killed. Some editors and producers understand that zombies carry dangerous mental and moral infections that may already have doomed civilization as we (used to) know it. But profits outweigh the risks of parading zombies in prominent places.

Two factions promote the prevalence of zombies in mass media: True Believers and Snarky Ironists. Believer media managers feature the living dead as hosts or guests to flaunt their twisted catechism. Media Ironists recognize zombies for the frightening freaks they are, but trumpet their grotesque views anyway to whip up outrage and energize their often demoralized “normal” base.

Unsurprisingly, many True Believers are zombies themselves, like Roger Ailes, who presides over the Fox zombie empire. Ailes spent decades promoting undead candidates such as Nixon and Reagan and Bush, all of whom were morally moribund before entering the White House. Like all zombies, Ailes has never had any actual ideas, only tactics, an obsession with ratings and an urge to rule.

He employs other soulless creatures like Sean Hannity and Bill O’Reilly, who substitute truculence for wit and shrillness for substance. Such tactics mesmerize the gullible and unwary, who fall under the zombie spell as their minds disintegrate and they too are doomed to wander empty-headed over the earth.

So-called progressive media are as guilty as Fox for promoting the zombie agenda. Salon and Raw Story and Talking Points Memo cannot resist quoting the mindless, outrageous comments of zombies such as Pat Robertson or Rick Santorum or Donald Trump, just to stir the pot. For liberal media, zombies are the freak show that helps lure rubes and readers into the main tent.

Irrational assertions by Robertson or other undead “ministers” who pretend to speak from religious conviction make for hilarious and/or infuriating headlines in otherwise supposedly rational publications. Robertson’s pronouncements, that Ivy League schools are preventing God’s miracles in America or that feminism causes women to kill their children and practice witchcraft, are simply too wackola not to report.

But this mockery – often in bold headlines – still spreads the soul-destroying zombie creed. And even ironic renderings of zombie madness have actual consequences. Consider Newt Gingrich. Though politically dead since the last millennium, when he resigned from Congress in disgrace, Gingrich was kept artificially “alive” long years after his political demise by constant exposure on cryogenic “news” programs, enabling his 2012 zombie candidacy for president.

Fox sustains political zombies long after their sell-by dates in public life: Sarah Palin and Dick Morris and Herman Cain are some of Fox’s dead talking heads. Other mumbling, unkillable corpses haunt radio airwaves, like Oliver North and Mike Huckabee. Sunday morning TV talk shows feature zombie panels grilling zombie guests, though it’s likely only zombies watch these shows.

The Republican presidential primary season was a veritable zombie jamboree. When Mitt Romney rose from the grave of his own hypocrisy and insular privilege to oppose Barack Obama, even Americans who dislike Obama’s policies voted for him anyway, simply because he was a live human being. That could have been his campaign slogan: Obama. He’s not a zombie.

Americans are still hung over from the Bush-Cheney zombie era of death and detention. We watched horrified as humans degenerated into zombies in front of our eyes, like Colin Powell at the United Nations. Rumsfeld, Wolfowitz, Rice, Woo – their names still sends shudders down the spine. Or the echo of their strange incantation: “We don’t want the smoking gun to be a mushroom cloud…”

The legions of political zombies who haunt Congress – McConnell, McCain, Hatch, Inhofe, Chambliss, Graham, et. al. – are a media cliché. Who keeps voting these creatures into office? Apparently others of their kind. Many so-called “reality” shows are mere zombie voyeurism: Survivor Housewives of the Jersey Shore. Shoot them, they get back up and keep coming.

For the common weal, it’s time for a mass media ban on zombies. True Believers cannot be dissuaded from their soulless course. Fox will be Fox. But progressive and mainstream media must cease offering zombies platforms to spout their venomous anti-life invective, even for scornful laughs. Exposure prolongs the power of the undead. Let them perish in a well-earned oblivion.

There is no reason to hear from – or about – the Westboro Baptist Church ever again. The living dead should not be given space to proselytize for their anti-human views, even when presented as freaks or perverts. Or from preachers of anti-gay sermons who turn out to be gay themselves. Religious hypocrisy is old news. Let Pat Robertson rant and rave only in the catacombs under the 700 Club.

Nor should media cover the mad posturings of notoriety-sucking undead like Donald Trump. Yes, Trump has completely missed the point of what it means to be human. But how often do we need to see him demonstrate that? Trump is like a race car driver with no brakes or pit crew, careening in circles. We watch him, waiting for his wheels to fly off, hoping no bystanders are seriously injured.

When you start to notice them, zombies are everywhere. We tend to take them for granted. But giving them free rein is a fatal mistake. Zombies won’t be content until they convert every last one of us to their ghastly ghetto of ghouls.

We’re fast approaching an apocalyptic tipping point. If we lived there we’d be home now. And we almost are.

3 Survival Foods For Your 72 Hour Kit For Any Emergency

2013-04-08T08:00:00.000-07:00

Your 72 hour kit should also contain survival foods so that you won't starve after a disaster strikes. During a crisis, stores are closed, ATM machines don't work and electricity and water services will be non-operational. According to emergency preparedness experts, we should all be prepared to care for ourselves for at least three days after a major crisis.

Every household should have at least a 72-hour supply of survival foods for every person in the home. Here are three of the most important survival foods you need to pack in your emergency food supply.

1) Meat
Protein is a very important tool for your body's overall health. Products such as meat, seeds, nuts, eggs, peas, dry beans, fish and poultry are all very rich in protein. Every healthy diet must consist of meat, or some sort of protein-enriched product.

Proteins are said to be the building blocks for blood, skin, cartilage, muscles and bones. Experts also say that they're the building blocks for vitamins, hormones and enzymes. Along with carbohydrates and fat, protein is one of the three main nutrients known to provide the calories needed for good health. Some of the other benefits include building and repairing of your body tissues, along with helping to produce antibodies. These antibodies are very important for helping to strengthen your immune system while helping to protect you from infections. Remember that many natural disasters have a way of stirring up dormant viruses.

Meats also contain Vitamin B, which assists the body with the task of releasing energy. Vitamin B also plays an extremely vital role when it comes to the functions of your nervous system. This can be very beneficial during a catastrophe, when your adrenalin is pumping and your heartbeat is racing because of stress.

2) Rice
Stress has a way of taking away our hard earned energy. It's during these times that you need to do everything you can to keep your energy levels high in order to deal with the crisis at hand. Rice is a great provider of instant, fast energy. Rice also helps keep you blood sugar levels stable. This is very important because stress can have a very negative affect on your blood sugar levels. If your levels become too high, or even too low, it could actually result in death. In many countries, rice is the #1 food staple.

3) Fruits/Vegetables
Vegetables and fruits contain essential fiber, minerals, nutrients and vitamins that are vital for good health. Most are very filling, which makes them the perfect snack, even in a crisis. They're also low in calories and fat, making them healthy snacks that even “weight watchers” don't have to worry about.

Many people don't know this. But, during each meal, 50% of your plate should contain veggies and fruits. The natural substances they provide help protect your body from contracting chronic diseases. Your 72 hour kit should contain fruits and veggies of different color varieties. This will ensure that your body receives a wide-range of the valuable nutrients it needs, such as vitamin A, vitamin C, potassium, folate and fiber to maintain good health during any emergency.

This content was prepared by Dirk Puckett. Daily Bread is an industry leader in long-term food storage plans. Ready to begin putting your food storage plan together? Start here and place your order today.

Zombies May Not Be Legally Responsible For Eating Bra-a-a-ains

2013-04-05T08:00:00.000-07:00

Turning into a zombie isn't exactly fun, but there could be one advantage: You may not be legally responsible for whoever you kill and eat while in the state.

That's the verdict from Ryan Davidson, a lawyer who focuses on the hypothetical legal ramifications of comic book tropes, characters, and powers at his blog, Law And The Multiverse.

"It depends on how the disease works," he said. "If zombies are effectively unconscious, then they would be incapable of performing voluntary actions and thus immune to criminal liability (or civil liability, for that matter). The zombies in the most recent 'I Am Legend' movie appear to be fully conscious, if perhaps a bit aggressive, so they could potentially be found liable. But in most others, probably not."

Davidson and his partner James Daily, will be discussing various legal aspects of being a zombie on Friday at WonderCon, a comic convention taking place in Anaheim, Calif. They will be joined by H. Eric Bender, M.D., Praveen R. Kambam, M.D., and Vasilis K. Pozios, M.D., three physicians specializing in forensic, child and adult psychiatry.

Daily said that a zombie apocalypse would be a mess for courts because the law sees consciousness as a black and white issue.

"From the law's perspective someone is either fully alive or fully dead; the law doesn't recognize the undead as a separate category (they are fictional, after all)," he stated by email. "I don't know that a separate category is necessary, though. In most zombie fiction, the zombies are either 'irreversibly deceased but reanimated corpses' or they are still-living humans whose behavior has been affected by supernatural means or a virus of some kind."

Davidson said there is also the question of whether zombies would have legal rights if brought to trial. He said it depends on how it reached the undead state.

"If 'zombies' are re-animated corpses, then no. The dead have no rights," he said. "But if 'zombies' are living people infected with some kind of virus, like in '28 Days Later,' then still have all the same rights they did before infection.

Friday's presentation will feature a mock trial with a former zombie and Daily said it's possible to argue that a person who is no longer undead could claim insanity for any crimes committed while in this brain-eating vegetative state.

"If the crimes were committed while they were a zombie, and if the zombie condition causes legal insanity (basically defined in many states as not knowing what you are doing and not knowing that what you are doing is wrong), then they would have an insanity defense, even if they were later cured," he said. "Some crimes have statutes of limitations that might run, but murder has no statute of limitations, and that's the crime most people are going to care about."

Pozios said the presentation is designed to explain legal insanity, a concept he says is often misunderstood.

"In order to be found legally insane, your mental state had to be so impaired that you didn't know that your act was wrong," he said. "A zombie would fit this description, although we are in no way equating people with mental illnesses to zombies.

"Featuring a now cured zombie highlights the fact that when it comes to legal insanity, a criminal defendant's mental state at the time of the act is what's relevant, not his or her current mental state during the trial. So, even if someone is perceived to be 'acting crazy' in the courtroom, that does not tell us about the issue of criminal responsibility."

Pozios concedes that the nature of the presentation forced them to use a former zombie instead of one currently in that state.

"A full-blown zombie would likely not be able to work with legal counsel or follow the trial, and thus would be Incompetent to Stand Trial," he explained. "Not to mention, it would be pretty difficult to assemble a jury of his peers."

'Zombie Survival' Class for Teens Slashed by School District

2013-04-03T08:00:00.000-07:00

Middle school students in Hermiston, Ore., are likely to find themselves woefully unprepared to respond to a zombie apocalypse, should such an event ever occur. But don’t blame Rich Harshberge, a middle school teacher at Armand Larive Middle School. He taught an extracurricular class on zombie survival skills, only to have it recently cancelled by district officials.

Harshberger’s course actually sounds suspiciously like a reading and writing class with a bit of zombie flair thrown in to help keep kids interested. As CNet.com reports, students had to keep a survival journal and "The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead" was assigned for you know… reading.

"It's gotten kids engaged that I wouldn't have gotten engaged before," Harshberger told the East Oregonian.

Engaged or not, Hermiston School District officials shut the popular class down. “The use of zombie-related materials is unfortunate and was not approved in accordance with district curricular policies,” said Superintendent Dr. Fred Maiocco, as part of a statement on the school’s website . “We extend our regrets to anyone offended by their use.”

The district’s statement also notes that the class wasn’t properly reviewed beforehand and that the subject matter has been deemed inappropriate for middle school students. Zombie survival has been replaced with an exploratory reading class.

While the school district was undoubtedly attempting to be cautious and prudent, many readers feel that an opportunity to make learning fun and interesting has been lost as a result. In response to a story about the class on KPTV.com, a reader named Wendy wrote, “Heaven forbid kids have fun while learning! The current reading classes are so boring and the reading materials are outdated. I would love to have any class like this that actually got my kids excited about reading!”

Of course, some agree with the district’s decision. As a reader named Dana wrote, “It's inappropriate for any school. What a stupid thing to even consider. Maybe that teacher plays too many video games!”

The Story of Zombie Jesus and the Easter Bunny

2013-04-01T08:00:00.000-07:00

Growing up in a Christian household, my brothers and I were no stranger to the whole story of Easter. You know, Jesus rising from the grave after being crucified and going back to heaven and all that. For the longest time we all blindly followed and believed what the pastor and our parents told us about the tale, not knowing the full truth.

Let me start from the beginning, being normal children we always loved the Easter Bunny. Hiding eggs, leaving little treats and candies. All around good times. Never once did we sit there and wonder, wait, how did we get from Jesus rising from the grave to a man sized rabbit hiding chocolate eggs around the house and yard?

Fast forward some years later and being a little more aware of this mystery, my brothers and I set out on a quest to find out the origin of the bunny. Surely Christians wouldn't let such a silly symbol represent one of the most important stories of their whole religion. The excuse of the rabbit being invented for marketing reasons by greeting card companies such as Santa for Christmas didn't seem to hold up under scrutiny either. For the most part we were coming up dry for answers and on the brink of giving up.

We had to go deeper.

After doing some further research we learned that for years in certain underground communities, instead of wishing a 'Happy Easter' they would wish a 'Happy Zombie Jesus Day'. Quite peculiar... When you put the elements of the Easter story together, the idea of Jesus being a zombie seemed to make sense. Jesus was dead and arose from the grave, much like a zombie. There were no stories however of him feasting on the brains of the living. That in itself seemed to debunk the tale of Zombie Jesus. When it then occurred to me.

"What if the reason there was no reports of him eating brains is because he was thwarted in his attempts?"

Now we were getting somewhere!

Upon reading some classified biblical documents leaked onto the internet, I learned that during his lifetime, Jesus was deathly afraid of rabbits. We're talking DEATHLY AFRAID, like Indiana Jones and snakes. I then learned that around the year of the crucifixion to keep themselves safe from unwanted spirits, the townsfolk placed bunnies around their houses. Unwanted spirits? Or Zombie Jesus? What if the townsfolk used his fear of bunnies to keep their brains safe? The eggs I'm guessing was sort of a marker letting any passers by know that the home was protected by the bunny.

That's the only logical explanation for the inexplicable appearance of the so called Easter Bunny. Every year we celebrate the true reason for the season without even knowing it. The humble rabbit, defender of mankind's brains.

'Plants vs. Zombies 2' is Coming in "Early Summer"

2013-03-29T08:00:00.000-07:00

Last August, PopCap Games vaguely announced a sequel to their mega-hit tower defense game Plants vs. Zombies, providing no real details but confirming that the game was a real thing that was in the works and slated for release sometime in "late spring 2013." There has basically been no word on the status of the sequel since then.

While announcing a limited beta launch of a Facebook version of the game called Plants vs. Zombies Adventures, PopCap once again vaguely confirmed that Plants vs. Zombies 2 is still a real thing that is still in the works, and rather than the late spring release window we should be seeing the game hit sometime during "early summer."

While there are still no details regarding what the new sequel will contain, Plants vs. Zombies Adventures on Facebook will feature new plant types, new zombies, new kinds of defenses, and all sorts of Facebook-y social integration. I imagine that Plants vs. Zombies 2 will entail many of those types of things too.

Life Goes On: Post-Armageddon Investment Ideas

2013-03-25T08:00:00.000-07:00

Dec. 21, 2012 came and went with nary a fireball falling from the sky. Doomsdayers and religious zealots are now scrambling to re-adjust now that they know the sun will come out tomorrow and for the foreseeable future. Some may have sold off all their earthly possessions and tangible assets, while others spent tens of thousands of dollars on a bunker they may now need only for tornados and hurricanes. Recovering financially from pre-doomsday activities can not only be done relatively quickly, but can keep you prepared in case the Mayans were off by a few months in their prediction.

Precious Metals

The world may not end due to fire and brimstone, but central bankers and their printing presses may well collapse the global economy in due time. The Federal Reserve has made clear it will continue its policy of "purchasing" $40 billion per month in mortgage debt through the early months of 2013. This means it will print $40 billion per month, hand it to member banks, and debase the currency all at the same time. The price of gold has grown sixfold in the past 10 years, while silver has skyrocketed by 1000 percent as a result of these money-printing policies. US Money Reserve is one of many providers who sell gold and silver bullion at real-time market prices. Many experts are predicting gold will reach the $3000-$5000 per ounce range by 2014, while silver's industrial uses will keep its demand high and supply low. Now is the time to purchase both metals to protect against hyperinflation, which inevitably will happen in 2013.

Wind Turbine

Though solar gets more publicity as far as an alternative energy source, a wind turbine can collect energy 24 hours a day in ideal conditions. Most manufacturers recommend you live in an area with an average wind speed of 10 miles-per-hour for maximum efficiency. A wind turbine, coupled with an 8-10 battery bank, can reliably power a small home's lights, refrigerator, and electronics. The key is to install the turbine at the highest point possible so trees and other objects cannot obstruct the wind's potential energy. Congress extended renewable energy tax credits in its fiscal cliff deal on New Year's Day, making turbines more affordable. The initial investment will pay for itself in a couple years, while you reduce your overall carbon footprint.

Fish Farming

Just because the apocalypse did not happen doesn't mean you should stop moving toward total self-sufficiency. Fish farming, or aquaponics, is a great way to produce your own food, if you have the space and time for it. The basics you will need to begin a fish farm is a pool, filtration system and water heaters. Once you add the fingerlings (baby fish), the idea is to keep the water clean by the removing the waste and keeping the pH levels balanced for maximum yield. A fish farm can be done indoors or outdoors, and will produce as much fish as the time you invest and the size of your operation.

Researcher: Zombie Fads Peak When Society Unhappy

2013-03-22T08:00:00.000-07:00

A Clemson University researcher says widespread interest in the world of the undead isn't just a random fad.

English professor Sarah Lauro says people are more interested in zombies when they're dissatisfied with society as a whole.

Lauro has been studying the concept of the "zombie walk," a mass gathering of people who dress in tattered clothing and stagger about like zombies. She says such events originated in Canada a decade ago.

Over the next few years, as the U.S. became embroiled in war in Iraq, Lauro says the concept gained popularity in this country and continued to grow.

She says that as of last year, zombie walks had been documented in 20 countries. Guinness World Records says the largest took place in 2010 in New Jersey, with 4,000 participants.

Zombies Prove Library's Aren't Dead

2013-03-20T08:00:00.000-07:00

A ripped black curtain shrouded the doorway of the library at A.G. West Black Hills High School in Tumwater.

Inside, bookshelves were covered with red spatters. Creepy-looking characters stood around tables, and a sign on the wall seemed explain everything: “Warning: This area has not been checked for Zombies.”

Black Hills’ “Zombie Café” was designed to create some buzz about the school’s library and get more students through its door, said librarian Deb Nickerson.

“Apocalypse fiction is a big thing,” she said. “We just have a lot of kids who are really into it so we thought, ‘Let’s just capitalize on it.’ ”

It’s an example of how the typical school library is no longer a silent oasis of book-filled shelves, card catalogs and a sense of order ruled by the Dewey Decimal System.

Today’s school libraries are designed to be fun and comfortable hubs of information and entertainment. They are gathering places, and often serve as venues for student events, such as poetry slams, musical programs and movie screenings.

And their collections go far beyond books. Teacher-librarians can often match students up with digital video cameras, electronic books, tablet computers and access to expensive online research databases.

Some even break what one might think would be a cardinal rule: No food allowed.

“I happen to have a Friday book club where kids can come, have their lunch in the library, and talk about books,” said Ann Marie Ratliff, a teacher-librarian at Jefferson Middle School in Olympia.

When River Ridge High School in Lacey remodeled its library a few years ago, the new design included a “laptop bar” where students could plug in and work from their personal laptop computers and tablets.

In order to make space, several shelves were removed from the library.

“I got rid of a lot of nonfiction,” said River Ridge teacher-librarian Sarah Applegate. “I surplussed it — it was outdated and not used. I got rid of a lot of my reference books, and I created a lot more space for fiction.”

Over the years, the job duties for school librarians have changed, too. Many districts have changed their title to teacher-librarian.

“I think older people assume teacher-librarians have storytimes and sit at a desk saying ‘Shh!’ and guarding old books,” said Sara Glass, a teacher-librarian at Peter G. Schmidt Elementary School in Tumwater.

In addition to promoting literacy, teacher-librarians often lead research classes and serve as their school’s technology specialist.

“My school has more than 200 students qualifying for free- or reduced-lunch and some don’t have any opportunity to use computers except in the library at school,” Glass said.

Ratliff said a big part of her job is helping students evaluate information and become “good digital citizens.”

“It used to be you could hand someone an encyclopedia, and say, ‘There ya go,’” she said. “Now, they find all sorts of information, and we try to help them decide what is the best source.”

Much of a teacher-librarian’s job is behind-the-scenes.

Nickerson said she often helps students fill out job and college applications, and compile their senior portfolios. She loves to talk about books, and enjoys helping students find a book that they’ll be interested in.

“I have a lot of kids who come in just to talk or ask for advice,” Nickerson added.

At the height of the Great Recession, many school districts across the country cut or eliminated teacher-librarian positions, according to Susan Ballard, president of the American Association of School Librarians, a division of the American Library Association.

Now, a lot of school districts are trying to add those positions back into their budgets, Ballard said.

“We seem to now be going through a restoration — a course correction,” she said. “They didn’t realize how critical that role was until someone wasn’t there.”

Ballard sees librarians playing an even bigger role as schools work to address the federal Common Core education standards.

“They really are a utility player in the school,” Ballard said. “They’re a teacher. They understand instruction. They understand instructional design. They understand assessments.”

In Washington, 15 teacher-librarians from around the state are developing a training that will help their peers become “Common Core coaches” for their schools, Applegate said.

It’s a natural fit because much of the work required by the standards is already being done by teacher-librarians, such as integrating internet tools into classroom lessons, she said.

“We have a really big picture view,” Applegate said. “We know all the grade levels of the school. We are naturally good at connecting disciplines.”

Ballard described her profession as “a wonderful example of evolution.”

“(We) have evolved to meet the information needs of people over time,” she said. “And we’ll continue to do so. We’re like cockroaches; we’re going to stay around.”

Does that mean they’ll survive the Zombie Apocalypse, too?

“Yes, because we’re informed, and we know where to find the resources to survive,” Ballard said with a laugh.

10 Tips for Dating Zombie Guys

2013-03-18T18:57:00.000-07:00

These days, the whole "Alternative" lover thing with girls has taken the world by storm. No longer will teenage females fall for just any ole' normal human being. You gotta be a Werewolf or Vampire or even a zombie for a girl to fall head over heels for ya. Yes you heard that right, girls are falling for ZOMBIES. Never thought I would say that.

Ever since the film Warm Bodies hit the silver screen the whole female population have been wetting their panties, not out of fear, but out of sheer lust for the sensation that is the sexy zombie. Looks like the humble walker is finally getting a little well deserved love.

If you are thinking of getting a rotting man for yourself you might want to read up on a few tips on handling his various quirks and whatnot that will come along with being undead and all.

Allow for his limited reflexes. It may take some time for him to open doors for you while he staggers limply from one place to the next. Give your zombie love time to be a gentleman. I'm thinking maybe an hour or two.

His taste in food will be extremely picky. There's no use in frying up some French snails or pickled onions and expecting him to rave about it. A piece of good steak or some lamb brains should be on the menu. Make it extra rare.

Don't run. Running might make him think you are prey and no one wants that. Probably best not to turn your back on him either.

Start reading up. This is one man who is interested in you for your brains, not your body.

Do not introduce your zombie love to your family too soon. Chances are they will freak out and that could put a real dampener on your new relationship. Wait and see if dating a zombie is really for you before you take that step.

Keep your zombie boyfriend away from your pets. Dogs and cats could attack him and remember zombies have very vulnerable, rotting flesh. Chances are if Rover gets to him, there won't be much of Zach the Zombie left.

Plan your date carefully. Meals and movies are fine but exertion is not good for a zombie and taking him to the beach in the hot sun will only make him rot faster. Be considerate of your zombie's needs.

Having kids with him is very unlikely. You need to have realistic expectations if you are going to make this work and frankly if you don't wake up in the middle of the night to discover he is having a midnight snack with your brains as the meal, you're ahead of the curve.

You have to decide what you are going to get out of this relationship. Zombies are not noted for their good looks or stimulating conversation. What's in it for you?

If all else fails, it might be time to find a gun.

Marvel of the Dead

2013-03-15T08:00:00.000-07:00

Zombie film legend George A. Romero was recently interviewed from the Lund International Fantastic Film Festival in Sweden by Twitchfilm, and he mentioned an interesting little comic-related tidbit:

ROMERO - I am also writing a comic for Marvel. I’m writing it now, but it’s plot is a secret.

TWITCH - Awww c’mon George, just a little nibble? A tid bit?

ROMERO - Well I can tell you it won’t involve any of their on-going characters, there will be no superheroes. But it will involve zombies!

Little is known about this new project the grandfather of all zombie films has going on, but as soon as more info becomes available you can bet your buns we will be reporting on it

DayZ Dev Diary Peeks Behind the Curtain of Animating Zombies [Video]

2013-03-13T08:00:00.000-07:00

Process videos aren’t always the most exciting things, but this one for DayZ’s standalone release is pretty interesting for horror fans. Dean “Rocket” Hall and his team at Bohemia Interactive are shown using motion capture to create animations for zombies, and discussing just what it is about their movement that is scary.

Stick around through the 20 minute+ video for chats with the team on why motion capture is the best tool for the job; new animation tools employed in the new engine; how the standalone release is progressing; and how the final game will hopefully scare the pants off you.