It's all in the details...

The ADHD Woman’s Not-To-Do List: Better Time Management When Your Brain Feels Foggy

2026-06-27T10:28:02.538-07:00

If you’re an ADHD woman navigating midlife, menopause, caregiving, work, or simply trying to keep up with life, you’ve probably been told the answer is better time management.

Buy a planner.
Create a schedule.
Wake up earlier.
Color-code everything.
Set more goals.

But what if the problem isn’t that you’re not doing enough?

What if the real solution is doing less?

As someone who spent years believing I needed a better planner, more discipline, or a stronger work ethic, I eventually discovered something important:

When my brain is foggy, overwhelmed, or overstimulated, adding more systems doesn’t help.

Removing friction does.

That’s why I created what I call my Not-To-Do List.

Instead of focusing on everything I should be doing, I focus on the things that drain my energy, create decision fatigue, and make my ADHD symptoms worse.

My Not-To-Do List

1. Don’t start the day by checking your phone

The fastest way to lose control of your attention is to give it away before your feet hit the floor.
Emails, texts, social media, news alerts—they all become someone else’s agenda for your day.
Give yourself 15–30 minutes before inviting the world into your brain.

2. Don’t create a giant to-do list

ADHD brains love possibilities.
Unfortunately, we often put all 27 possibilities on today’s list.
Then we look at it and freeze.
Instead, choose three priorities.
Not twenty-three.
Three.
Your brain needs clarity more than ambition.

3. Don’t trust your memory

This one changed everything for me.
Brain fog plus ADHD equals disappearing thoughts.
If it’s important, write it down immediately.
Notes app.
Sticky note.
Voice memo.
Planner.
Napkin.
Your brain is for ideas, not storage.

4. Don’t wait until you “feel motivated”

Motivation is unreliable.
Action creates momentum.
Some days I tell myself I only need to work on something for five minutes.
Most of the time, five minutes turns into thirty.
The goal isn’t perfection.
The goal is starting.

5. Don’t multitask

For years I thought multitasking was my superpower.
Turns out it was mostly stress with a productivity costume on.
Every time we switch tasks, our brain pays an energy tax.
Focus on one thing.
Finish it or make meaningful progress.
Then move on.

6. Don’t make unnecessary decisions

Decision fatigue is real.
Especially for women who spend all day making choices for everyone else.
Create defaults whenever possible.
The same breakfast.
The same workout time.
The same grocery list.
The fewer decisions you make, the more energy you preserve for what matters.

7. Don’t compare your productivity to someone else’s

This is a big one.
Many productivity systems were not designed for ADHD brains.
Your goal isn’t to become someone else.
Your goal is to understand how your brain works and build systems that support it.
Progress counts.
Even if it looks different from everyone around you.

Productivity Isn’t About Doing More

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned in my 50s is that productivity isn’t about squeezing more into your day.

It’s about creating enough space for what matters.

When we’re living with ADHD and brain fog, our energy becomes one of our most valuable resources.

Protecting that energy is productive.

Simplifying is productive.
Resting is productive.
Saying no is productive.

Using a timer, creating routines, and building supportive systems are productive.

The most effective productivity tool I’ve found isn’t a planner or an app.

It’s permission.

Permission to stop trying to manage my life like someone without ADHD.

Permission to work with my brain instead of against it.

And sometimes that starts with a simple question:

What can I stop doing today?

Because the fastest path to better time management isn’t always adding something to your list.

Sometimes it’s creating a Not-To-Do List instead.

Freedom Without Structure Becomes Chaos

2026-06-13T20:41:20.030-07:00

For most of my life, freedom was the thing I thought I wanted most.
Freedom to choose.
Freedom to create.
Freedom to work on my own terms.
Freedom from schedules, routines, and anything that felt restrictive.

I have always been a creative person. Ideas come easily to me. Inspiration has never been the problem. In fact, if ideas alone could build a life, I’d have built ten by now.

What I didn’t understand for many years was that freedom and structure are not opposites.

They are partners.

And when one exists without the other, things start to fall apart.

For a long time, I believed my struggles came from a lack of discipline.

I watched people consistently follow routines, stick to plans, and complete projects while I seemed to bounce between bursts of intense productivity and periods where even simple tasks felt overwhelming.

I told myself I needed to try harder.

Be more motivated.
Get more organized.
Have more faith.
Develop more self-control.

What I didn’t know then was that I was trying to solve the wrong problem.

After being diagnosed with ADHD later in life, so many pieces of my story finally began to make sense.

I wasn’t lazy.
I wasn’t unmotivated.
I wasn’t failing because I lacked character.
I was trying to build a life entirely on inspiration.

And inspiration is a wonderful visitor, but a terrible foundation.

When hyperfocus shows up, I can accomplish more in a day than I thought possible.

I can create, plan, dream, build, and solve problems for hours without noticing time passing.

But hyperfocus is also unpredictable.

It arrives unannounced and leaves just as quickly.

Building a life around waiting for motivation or inspiration to strike is a little like building a house on sand.

Eventually, everything starts shifting underneath you.

That’s where structure comes in.

Not rigid structure.
Not perfection.
Not a color-coded planner that requires more maintenance than the life it’s supposed to organize.

The kind of structure I’m talking about is gentle.

Supportive.
Flexible.

It’s creating systems that make it easier to do what matters, even on the days when motivation is nowhere to be found.

It’s having a place for ideas to live so they don’t all compete for attention in my head.
It’s creating routines that reduce decision fatigue.
It’s setting myself up for success instead of relying on willpower.

For years, I saw structure as something that would limit my freedom.

Now I see it as the thing that protects it.

Because without structure, freedom often turns into overwhelm.

Too many options.
Too many unfinished projects.
Too many ideas pulling us in different directions.
Too much mental clutter.

The irony is that the more intentional structure I’ve created in my life, the more freedom I’ve experienced.

Freedom from constantly feeling behind.
Freedom from starting over every Monday.
Freedom from believing I needed to fix myself.
Freedom from the exhausting cycle of guilt and self-criticism.

These days, I’m learning that success isn’t about forcing myself to become someone else.

It’s about understanding how I’m wired and building a life that works with that reality instead of fighting against it.

Maybe that’s what reinvention really is.

Not becoming a different person.

But finally understanding who you’ve been all along.

And creating the structure that allows that person to thrive.

Because freedom without structure may become chaos.

But freedom supported by structure?

That’s where possibility lives.

The Bi-annual Blogger

2026-05-10T16:20:00.000-07:00

The “Bi-Annual Blogger”… Again (But This Time It’s Different)

If you’ve been here before, welcome back.

If you’re new here… well, there’s something you should know.

I have a long history of showing up… and disappearing.

In fact, one of my last posts was titled “The Twice-a-Year Blogger.”
At the time, I meant it as a joke. A light way to acknowledge my inconsistency.

But if I’m being honest, it wasn’t really a joke.

It was confusion.
It was frustration.
It was me trying to understand why I could care so much about something… and still not follow through.

For years, I thought I was just lacking something.

Discipline.
Focus.
Consistency.
Faith.
Something.

I kept thinking:
“If I could just fix this one thing about myself… everything else would fall into place.”

So I tried.

Over and over again.

New systems.
New routines.
New promises to myself.

And every time I didn’t follow through, it quietly reinforced the same belief:

Maybe I just don’t measure up.

What I Didn’t Know Back Then

I didn’t know I had ADHD.

I didn’t understand why my brain worked the way it did.
Why I could feel deeply inspired one moment… and completely disconnected the next.
Why starting felt easy—but continuing felt impossible.

So instead of understanding myself…

I judged myself.

I labeled it as laziness.
Lack of discipline.
Lack of commitment.

But it was never that simple.

What I’m Starting to Understand Now

I’m not broken.
I’m not missing something.

I just didn’t have the right lens.

And once you start seeing yourself differently… everything begins to shift.

Not overnight.
Not perfectly.
But honestly.

So, Why Am I Back?

Because this blog was never really about consistency.

It was about capturing the journey.

The small moments.
The quiet realizations.
The in-between spaces where life is actually happening.

I started this space to remind myself to:

slow down
Notice the details
“stop and smell the roses” (even when life felt chaotic)

Somewhere along the way, I thought I needed to turn it into something more structured… more polished… more consistent.

And when I couldn’t… I stopped.

This Time Feels Different

Not because I suddenly have everything figured out.

But because I’m not trying to force myself into something I’m not anymore.

This isn’t about becoming a “perfect blogger.”
This isn’t about posting every week.
This isn’t about doing it right.

This is about showing up… as I am… when I can… and telling the truth about what this journey actually looks like.

If You’re Still Here

Maybe you’ve felt this too.

Like you’re always almost there… but never quite.
Like everyone else got a manual you somehow missed.
Like you’re constantly trying to fix something about yourself.

If that’s you—I see you.

And maybe… just maybe…
there’s nothing wrong with you either.

So Here We Go… Again

Not as “The Twice a Year or Every Two Year Blogger.”

But as someone who is finally starting to understand herself.

And maybe, through that…

I can help someone else feel a little less alone.

Dopamine Detox is a Thing

2024-07-08T11:30:00.000-07:00

Dopamine detox is a thing, it’s real, and an act of self-love 💕

Stepping Back to Come Back to Myself

A couple of years ago, something in me started to shift.

I didn’t have a big, dramatic reason.
There wasn’t a defining moment where everything suddenly changed.

I just felt… pulled.

Pulled to step back.
Pulled to quiet the noise.
Pulled to stop the constant cycle of posting, sharing, and keeping up.

So I did something that felt uncomfortable at the time—I eased back from social media.

Especially Facebook.

And if I’m being honest, it wasn’t easy at first.

I felt the FOMO.
I felt the guilt.
I felt like I was falling behind… like I wasn’t keeping up with friends, family, and everything happening in the world.

There was this subtle pressure that if I wasn’t there, I was missing something important.

But here’s what I discovered…

Life didn’t stop.

The world kept turning.
The people who mattered were still there.
The conversations that truly meant something still happened—just not always online.

The things I needed to know… I found out anyway.

And slowly, something unexpected happened.

The noise started to fade.

Without the constant input, comparison, and scrolling… I started to hear myself more clearly.

My thoughts felt less cluttered.
My emotions felt more grounded.
My perspective started to shift.

I began to realize how much of what I was consuming was shaping how I felt—without me even being fully aware of it.

And for the first time in a long time, I felt a sense of clarity.

Don’t get me wrong—I still see the value in social media.

It can connect people.
It can inspire.
It can educate.

But I also understand now that it’s not neutral.

And for me, in that season of my life, it wasn’t healthy.

It made me think…

What did we ever do before all of this?

Before the constant updates.
Before documenting every moment.
Before feeling like our lives needed to be shared to be validated?

Somewhere along the way, we started experiencing life through a screen.

And I started to question that.

It’s okay to go to a concert and actually be there.

To feel the music.
To look around.
To take it in with your own eyes instead of through your phone.

It’s okay to have an incredible meal and not post it.

To sit with the moment.
To taste it.
To enjoy it fully without needing to share it with the world.

It’s okay to live your life… without documenting every part of it.

Because when you step back, you realize something important:

Not everything needs to be seen to be meaningful.

Some moments are meant just for you.

Stepping away didn’t disconnect me.

It reconnected me.

To myself.
To my thoughts.
To what actually matters.

And maybe that’s what I needed all along.

Not more input.
Not more noise.
Not more comparison.

Just space.

Space to think.
Space to feel.
Space to understand myself in a deeper way.

Looking back now, I can see how much that decision shaped everything that followed.

It created room for awareness.
For healing.
For the realizations I’m just now beginning to fully understand.

So if you’ve been feeling overwhelmed…
If something in you is telling you to step back…
If you’re craving quiet but feel guilty for wanting it…

Maybe listen to that.

Because it’s okay to not keep up.

It’s okay to not share everything.

It’s okay to just… live your life.

And sometimes, stepping back…

is exactly what brings you closer to yourself.

The Twice a Year Blogger

2024-06-16T00:22:00.000-07:00

Funny not funny but true- I am the twice a Year Blogger!

I admit it, I have the best intentions, but then six months pass by and I don't blog one single thing!

I am very aware that if you want to build something, you must be consistent. I am aware of so many things, but I have been going through yet another transformative journey in the last year or so. I stopped using FB in January 2023 and it was the best thing I could have done for my mental health. I did not realize how bad it made me feel until it was no longer a constant in my life. Don't get me wrong, I see the value in it when you use it for good, it was just for me, in that season of my life, completely toxic and determental to my mental wellbeing.

I made major moves entering into my 50's and I am still in that journey - life is such a journey! It takes you through so many unexpected twists and turns. I am finally prioritising my health, and finally getting to the bottom of many of my anxst and symptoms of constant anxiety and fear.

I finally decided to go to formal therapy. I have tried to self-soothe, and expand on my spirituality, dive into mindset work and just try to suck it up and accept this has been and will be my life. To top it all off, I started with perimenopause and that has been and added layer of additional self discovery. After discussing so many things with my therapist, I had an epiphny and realized that I have probably been suffering hormonal imbalances since my mid-thirties and I have gone undiagnosed for years. I also have been identifying a lot with symptoms of ADHD and it has been very interesting learning more about it.

It is truly sad and disappointing that women's health is not taken very seriously and most women get dismissed by their primary care physicians and OB/Gyns and most women feel unseen and unheard. I know I have for years, because I have tried so many times to ask for a simple hormonal pannel and they have told me it is not standard of care to check for hormones if I am having regular periods. I was told in more than one occasion that the topic of hormonal imbalances is just a tick toc trend. So frustrating!

We'll the epiphany was that I have probably been experiencing hormonal imbalances for years and now that I am 50 this is becoming more apparent and intense. I am going to have to seek care outside the United States with a hormone specialist. I have to make an appointment very soon and get to the bottom of this.

For years I have experienced chronic anxiety among other symptoms and I have never been able to understand why. I feel I have dealt with it so long that I have mastered the art of being a high functioning anxious person. It does not dibilitate my everyday work but it is there every day. As I mentioned, I have tried prayer, meditation, mindset work but somehow nothing really seems to work long term. It may very well be something physical and I have endured this necessarily. It is persistent and frankly exhausting. I am tired of feeling tired, and inadequate guilty and hopeless at times. I want to find joy in my journey.

More to come as I embark in this journey of self discovery once again. Perhaps once I figure things out and finally get the care and relief I need I will have the energy, vitality and motivation to do the things I enjoy doing and be consistent with this blog of mine.

Make Sure You Are Happy in Real Life

2023-01-17T10:48:00.002-08:00

It has been 10 days without Facebook. I have reached out for it a couple times, all of a sudden I wonder how someone is doing or I want to reach out, but I have been able to do so by other means and that is perfectly fine. 10 days and I do not believe anyone has noticed. There was one person who always liked my posts who has reached out; one out of 605. This need to post every single thought and thing is pretty ridiculous. NOBODY cares!

I have felt relieved for the most part, I kept Instagram, however, I am really trying to stay away there as well. I accidently saw a post from someone doing something I was trying to avoid and it upset me. It is still very toxic for me to even consider coming back. Maybe I never will.

I spent quality time, watching things that inspire me and feed my brain, creating a vision for my future and prioritizing my finances etc. I believe the more room I make for these things the happier I will be.

This past weekend was a four day weekend for me due the to Martin Luther King Holiday and it was super rainy where I live. We spent most of the days indoors, cooking and napping and spending quality time. What a beautiful concept. That is precisely my motto - it's all in the details.

The more I give myself grace for not being online and pressuring myself to perform the tasks others expect of me around my business the happier I am, and no one really needs to know that.

I need to make sure I am happy in real life first before sharing any kind of value to others through my social media.

So onward and forward!

Can I survive without Facebook?

2023-01-10T09:11:00.001-08:00

Today I made a bold move - I deactivated my Facebook account. I only told my husband and one person who will moderate my groups while I am gone. I may return, I may never go back. I felt a sudden need to do it, to be bold and determined, fearless. But can I survive?

Social media and our phones have become part of us, almost like an extension or an appendage and frankly I am sick of it. Do not get me wrong, I have always looked at the bright side of things, and even during the pandemic found ways to let it be a tool for good, to spread joy, positive messages and shine light in the dark. I have however found myself feeling depleted, and uninspired even a little disgusted with it all. I am not finding joy in any of the groups I belong to, I am so tired of the same heard mentality, everyone is doing the same thing in one way or another, everyone is selling something and very few people are having deep and meaningful conversations. Not that anyone is reading this blog anyway, but it is for me, for my growth and for my exercise in discipline, consistency and self-expression.

What if I use the time I wasted daily in enriching my life? What if I finally found the discipline to blog here consistently and continue to learn and build it? What if I now have time to study and get myself certified in my profession? What if I start learning about real estate, investing and finances? What if I re-take my interior design career? Suddenly I feel hopeful and a bit relieved...

I could have just logged off but I feel I needed to disappear completely from the 605 people who have front row seats to my life but no input, no meaningful or honest relationship with me. Everyone one is busy living their lives, yet they are tuning in to everyone else and for what? Who cares!

I'll be ok- I will survive.

Can I reinvent myself at 50?

2023-01-03T14:00:00.000-08:00

I am a self proclaimed late bloomer but how far can I take this notion?

When is it time to finally answer the question - What do I want to do when I grow up?

I know one thing for certain, this life is a journey and nothing is in vain or wasted, however it is time to define my ultimate goals and become laser focused on them.

What is it that I really want?

What makes ME happy?

What sets MY soul on fire?

I think it is valid to ask those questions, knowing God and the Universe have placed those desires in my heart and they are waiting to co-create with me. Waiting for me to decide and create space for those desires to manifest.

I feel it in my bones - this is the year to do it!

What do you want to do when you grow up?

How has it been a year?

2022-06-20T19:07:00.023-07:00

And yet I STILL keep getting drawn to come back and blog here. Am I finally going to make this happen?

I proved to myself that imperfect action works... so here I go again.

I have so much to share about my growth in the last year. SO MUCH.

I truly hope to build this blog and serve a community of like-minded people who have the desire to grow and find joy in their journey.

Structure is in the details

2021-06-13T13:46:00.001-07:00

My mind is blown on this lazy Sunday morning, June 13, 2021, on day zero of my 30-day self-challenge, at the perfection of serendipity and divine intuition. All throughout my journey of self-discovery and search for purpose, there have been very clear guideposts, teachers, and angels along the way who have held my hand and taught me so much. All I had to do is trust my gut, follow my intuition, and open my heart to hope and possibilities. Before then, I had found myself in a dark pit where I could not even trust my own gut, I had forgotten to listen to my heart, and I began to distrust my intuition.

How did I get there? I think is irrelevant now; I spent too much time for too long asking those questions only to find frustration, regret, and hopelessness. So instead, I think what is more compelling here for me is what got me here, to the now.

As I close this personal challenge, I stumble upon three major guideposts in this beautiful life journey, and I know none is left to coincidence. The perfection of these three beautiful gifts and how they correlate to one another is breathtaking to me. I am so humbled and grateful and so full of hope.

Browsing social media, I ran across an interview Marie Forleo was conducting of Martha Beck, speaking of her latest work, The Way of Integrity. It is so interesting to me that Martha Beck is someone that is not new to me because angels along the way lead me to her articles on Oprah Magazine and some of her books. I do not know how many years ago a co-worker gifted me her book Finding Your Own North Star. She probably knew that it would be something I would enjoy reading, as I have shared my desire to find my way in life, the gift was very much appreciated, but I never read it; I do not know why. In my constant scramble to seek answers, I have compiled a large library of self-help books, and some have captured my attention, and some have piled up with the great intention to read them one day. The point here is that I had heard of Martha Beck, and when I saw the interview on Instagram, I stopped to listen. They talked about her life briefly and how this book is a great tool to find balance and structure in your life, something I have been actively pursuing in my life for years, but especially in the last 30 days. I was immediately drawn in, and with not much thought, I ordered the book on Audible, started listening, and knew right away I needed it in hard copy. In addition, I also ordered The Divine Comedy from Dante Alighieri because the way she illustrates the steps into integrity and how it correlates with Dante's poems just completely captivated me. I was so fortunate to pick John Ciardi's translation because it makes the reading understandable and relatable. I had never really considered myself an avid reader and more of an art lover than a scholar, but I have grown to appreciate the art of reading and have realized the tremendous power it holds.

Today a Facebook reminder from 2019 popped up, again, no coincidence here. I can't help but share this quote from Jim Rhon, one of those teachers along the way, when he says, "Learning is the beginning of wealth. Learning is the beginning of health. Learning is the beginning of spirituality. Searching and learning is where the miracle process begins". This is truly what got me here, to the now.

I posted that quote from Jim Rohn with this other quote from Einstein I found online.

I can't but feel overwhelmed with a sense of gratitude for the divine protection, inspiration, and gentle and, at times, not so gentle nudging. Again today, when I paused for a moment from reading how to read Dante and the translator's notes, I went on social media where I ran across the app Fabulous; after reading more about it, I discovered it is the perfect tool to help me build the structure my soul has desired for decades. An app that takes you on a journey into the depths of your being and helps you climb three mountains! Foundations, Struggle, and Mastery; If you know Dante and the Divine Comedy, you can see the correlation and the perfection of it all. I am so blown away right now!

I could write for hours today; thoughts are swirling in my head of all the beautiful connections and serendipities, of how Dante was an Aries and how the struggles depicted in the Devine Comedy sparked around when he was 35 years old, time most people and I reach a crossroads in life. I have so much in my heart to share, but I must stop here for now and gather myself.

The beauty here is that I am ready, and that is why I know these things have fallen on my lap today, and I cannot wait to see where this takes me, out of hell into purgatory and onto my ultimate destination, the Paradiso.

Focus on the next small step

2021-06-11T21:43:00.001-07:00

I am done feeling inadequate, so I am taking matters into my own hands. Through this exercise, I have discovered many things about my desires and aspirations and the many things I want to accomplish. But I realize that this will all take time, and it can only move forward if I take small steps and invest the time to learn and perfect as I go.

I do not believe that I have failed to blog for 30 days with consistency, intention, the right reasons, etc. Because I realized I lack so much knowledge, I realize I have to deliberately invest the time and tap into the many available resources. Treat this as a job and schedule a set time to "work" on it.

That being said, I also realized that I have to give myself grace and maybe not bite more than what I can chew. I propose to myself, re-taking the challenge, but this time with structure and more intention. Utilize the tools I have gained, and continue to research and learn about this blogging world. Maybe I can make another attempt and allow myself to blog once or twice a week, as long as it is consistent and well planned out. I have two days to go through this challenge. Tomorrw I will post some of the tips I learned about at the surface level of my research; hopefully, it can help someone who is also on this journey of discovery.

I have been blindly following my intuition and just typing - there is merit to that. This small step with a bit of focus has helped me leap into a whole new territory.

Now let's see if I can find a better-looking countdown widget!

Let your desires become stronger than your excuses

2021-06-08T23:05:00.004-07:00

Four days later.... Yes, my last post was Friday the 4th. By the time the weekend comes, I have noticed that I get focused on other things, family, and commitments, and the blog becomes an afterthought. And I have the push and pull inside that I "should" do it instead of "want" to do it.

Friday, I had to take my doggy Charlie to a vet appointment right after work. On my way, my husband askes me if I want to go out to dinner; being that things are opening up again, our favorite Mexican El Patio restaurant was just what sounded so good after a stressful long week. Our 20-year-old daughter joined us, and we had a charming evening. Coming back to the restaurant was such a pleasant surprise because, during the pandemic, they remodeled and refreshed the restaurant, and it looks incredible. The atmosphere was so nice, and the food? OMG, the best. I had the albondigas plate, and it tasted so homemade, it reminded me of how my grandma used to make them.

Getting back home, I felt so full and relaxed that I had to lay down for a bit, and it was lights out for me. Saturday- we had a trip planned to see family in El Centro later in the day, so in the morning, we took it easy, and my husband made a leisurely breakfast. He made the best vegan dish inspired by one of our favorite vegan chefs recipe Gaz Oakley. It was tofu scramble on top of toasted ciabatta bread; talk about it's all about the details. We had an amazing breakfast then started getting ready to leave - We ended up leaving around 1:30pm and got there an hour and a half later. During our visit, we went to pay our respects to my late mother-in-law, who passed 10 months ago; it was a great opportunity to visit and spend some quality time with my father-in-law, who took some flowers to her that day. We visited my hubby's grandparents' and uncle's graves and shared some sweet memories on our way out.

We headed over to the store then my sister-in-law's house where the rest of the family was getting together; this was mostly a bonding time for my husband with his brother, sister, and father after such a great loss and the pandemic, which had prevented us from physically gathering for over a year. The weather was hot, and there is something about being below sea level that always makes me lethargic, or maybe I just needed the rest. I ended up staying most of the visit indoors, with my nieces and my daughter catching up and watching tv in the air conditioning. I also knew I was going to be the one driving home, so I took a nap. Overall it was a nice break from the norm, and it was a lovely time. We headed back home close to midnight and got home about 2am.

Sunday was supposed to be about sleeping in and taking it easy, and it was, but it wasn't. I got up around 8am, took Charlie out to potty, gave him food, made coffee, and folded some laundry. I literally got my laptop to write, and then my husband got up and came over to see what I was up to. He turned on the TV, I was planning on sitting there in the quiet with my coffee and write, and he did ask, but I didn't want to turn him away or leave. What really is more important here? That was a choice I made. We then started to talk about breakfast and noticed we needed some ingredients, so while he got some of it started I headed over to the store, which is literally a skip and a hop away—the first trip of the day. When I was there, I noticed that they had potting soil and plant food, so I grabbed some and decided I would transplant some of the plants I had been meaning to re-pot and desperately needed it. I made it a whole experience - got a folding table, my gardening gloves, the pots, and the plants and enjoyed every minute of it. I have never considered myself much of a gardener, but I know it is super therapeutic and relaxing to take care of plants; it indeed was. I watered the plants in the patio, moved some of them around, watered and fed the indoor ones, and felt so good about it. I ended up making two more trips to the store for additional soil and succulent food, then realized I needed more cleaning products, then the third trip was to grab some finger foods for dinner time. Since we had a big brunch and the kitchen was already clean, we would just use the air fryer for cooking some finger foods; mozzarella sticks, mini quiche, chicken fingers, and fries. My daughter and her boyfriend watched some tv, and my hubby and I headed to bed.

Monday morning came, and it was time to go back to work; I still felt tired from the weekend, and a little sleep-deprived worked and offered to give my co-worker a ride home since she needed a lift. This was a little out of my way, but I did not mind; I just took my time and went with the flow. I got home and hung out with my daughter; my hubby felt the same, just in need of more rest, so he went his way, and we stayed in the living room. This was yet another opportunity for me to make a choice and a decision to spend quality time with my daughter or rush and blog something quick for the sake of keeping my word. I did not do it. But this morning, it made me think about how far I have to organize my time and really anchoring my intentions. Can someone really have the best of both worlds, or does everything have to be a sacrifice? I think planning and organization will be key, and creating a specific time and space to do the work is going to be necessary so that it does not interfere with everyday life.

One of the YouTubers mentioned that a blog should not be lengthy, but I am catching up here for the last four days. Do I retake this challenge and make myself accountable to blog every single day? How bad do you want it? I ask myself. I am aware that some kind of sacrifice will be involved, but I have to come to terms with what and when.

Top 10 Lessons Derived from Imperfect Action

2021-06-04T14:14:00.000-07:00

I have ten more days to blog from my 30-day challenge and what a great opportunity to reflect on the top ten things I have learned so far. I know I have far more to go but I am amazed what a little focus and time can accomplish.

Here are my top 10 Lessons

1. GET STARTED NOW - STOP OVERTHINKING
2.     clarity will come from taking IMPERFECT action
3.     creativity starts to flow when you create space for it
4.     become an expert in your field - research free resources
5.     you do not have to be perfect - learn and refine as you go
6.     STOP REGRETTING THE PAST - ONLY LOOK FORWARD
7.     LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES - DON'T GET STUCK THERE
8.     ANALYSIS PARALYSIS WILL GET YOU NOWHERE
9.     HELPFUL free TOOLS TO MAKE LIFE SIMPLER - use them
10. WHEN YOU FALL 10 TIMES GET BACK UP 11 - KEEP GOING

take a leap of faith find inspiration

2021-06-02T20:50:00.006-07:00

I have spent the last couple days diving into research and I am so grateful for the wealth of information out there and the generosity of so many giving knowledge freely online. I am learning so much and have been thinking that sometimes there is a certain level of braveness with naivete.

When my heart lead me to write a blog, I just went for it not having a single clue of what that means, then over thought about it and got paralyzed, then I would come back and write and make attempts, and research a little, but then get overwhelmed about all the information out there and leave the blog. I think the difference now is that I am allowing myself to take imperfect action and learn as I go. Instead of feeling overwhelmed and paralyzed, I feel energized and inspired to learn more. Yesterday was coming back from Memorial Day Weekend and a long day of work, still had to run errands, cook dinner, clean kitchen etc after that. Too tired to blog, an excuse? No but the reality of it all.

Photo by STIL on Unsplash

I believe inspired action is way more effective than going through the motions for the sake of completing a task. I do understand the discipline part is what I am attempting to develop here. I want to continue learning and developing a content calendar to have a guideline of what I want to blog about and organize my thoughts. Theme here? Organization and purpose.

Journey of 1000 steps starts with a brave one

2021-05-31T13:19:00.002-07:00

I am so excited! Yesterday after blogging I realized that I have so much to go, so much to learn. I have just been afraid to dig deep and learn. Why? I do not know, but I am done with excuses. I bought an audio book about starting a blog when not having a clue, and I watched several tutorials about starging a blog, and all the things it entails. I am an avid learner and find that I thrive when I am learning. I just have to be captured by the topic and fully invested in it otherwise I lose interest. In any regard, I have set out to learn about what I am doing and taking this seriously. I do believe it is no coinsidence that I keep feeling like I need to build this, work on this and make something of it. The creative juices are already flowing, I took so many notes, and that is scratchign the surface. I think I am ok at the moment, using this platform and taking imperfect action, the key word here is action. I have come to learn that once you take that step things start to move and flow in the direction they should.

Fall down 10 times, get back up 11

2021-05-30T12:05:00.001-07:00

What is it that creates an insatiable fire within to keep someone going? I think the fire can be there, but creating structure and discipline helps keep that fire going. Why did I not blog Friday and Saturday?

Friday I was really looking forward to coming home, relaxing having a nice evening with my family, and it was fabulous, we stayed up quite late. Saturday I intentionally did not want to have commitments or deadlines. Again, enjoyed the downtime and really did not do much. I tried blogging but I just did not have the inspiration. I ask myself why? I see so many people fired up and going and going at 110% or so it seems. That begins to play with impostor syndrome for me. I begin to question why do I even bother writing basically just for myself, who is making me write for 30 days? I realize that this is precisely the area I need to work on, consistency, discipline and commitment to my own self. Doing the easy thing is quitting and not keeping my commitment, but deep down inside I know that this is not what I truly want. But what is it that keeps that fire going, what brings that passion that never wants to stop?

One of the things I am learning is that creating consistency requires planning and goal setting. Aloting designated time to do a certain task. I am going to try this on the days I have left of the 30 days. Use my agenda and assign a certain specific time to blog. I am not going to hammer myself down, and feel bad, I am going to focus on the positives this exercise is bringing to the foreground.

Below, is what I was looking forward to after a hard and stressful week, a relaxed fun time with my family with some great music, toasted crusty bread, bruschetta, a nice and spicy bloody mary with giant Spanish olives, and cocktail shrimp. I went live on my Facebook group and had a nice time. Those were the beautiful details that filled my evening, and I have no regrets because at the end of the day IT is truly all about the details...

You have the power to make a change

2021-05-27T21:51:00.002-07:00

They say that the definition of insanity is repeating the same behavior over and over and expecting a different result. To me, and what I have come to learn, is that it is all about choices. We have the power to make a change, make a decision, take a step. On the other hand, we choose to remain where we are and keep seeing the same results. Today's lesson and theme were about overcoming stress and managing stress by trying something out of the ordinary. It was about doing something even if I am not feeling like it. I have learned that when we do not want to or feel like doing something, those are the moments where we have that opportunity to make a choice. It is again the power of focus. What do I want to focus my energy on?

I have experienced for years, coming home from work tired, stressed, and worn out, and I flop on the couch or bed, and all I want to do is sleep. Sure we all need that once in a while, very valid, but this can have lasting repercussions if it becomes a chronic habit. It certainly did not help my anxiety which then turned into depression. Why? Because I was repeating the same patterns of thought, the same behaviors, the same routine, and not giving myself a chance to try something else. And the worst part is that the more you give in to the same patterns of behavior, the worse you feel, and it is literally a circle of insanity. So today, I challenged myself to push through, and even if I wanted to come home and lay down, I put on my shoes and work out clothes and walked the dog, then I got on the treadmill for 20 minutes. I can truly say I have no regrets. I invite you to break out of the norm, try a different route, switch it up, try something new, and share what you feel. I know I am probably writing only for myself...but that's ok.

You've come a long way baby

2021-05-26T20:44:00.002-07:00

On the topic of finding balance and giving grace. I found it very interesting that today there were several messages I found on social media on this very topic. I often find that I tune in to exactly the things I need to hear and learn. Good reminders to recognize that overall I have overcome many challenges, I have created good changes in my life, I have survived adversities and in the middle of it all have found grace, love and understanding from the universe and my own self. Here a beautiful reminder from Gabby Bernstein's facebook post today.

You Are Not Alone

2021-05-25T20:34:00.004-07:00

Today was a much better day! I think we all have the ups and downs in life, and sometimes it is just ok to let them be. For years I fought against my feelings, suppressing them, criticizing them, judging them, which led me to anxiety and depression. The more I continued to fight against it and not really take the time to understand myself or allow myself to feel, I started to experience physical symptoms, pains, aches, stomach issues, skin issues, numbness, and tingling in my extremities. You see, if you do not listen to your inner voice, that voice gets louder and louder, and if you still do not listen, life has a way to put you in situations where you have no choice but to listen. Why do some of us have to wait until that happens? If I can help one person realize that making adjustments as soon as something feels off and not letting them get to extremes, I will consider myself very blessed. I had to learn the hard way; no one told me these things.

I suppose most people do not know better; no one really explains those things to us. We think we are wrong or wrong with us physically or mentally, and we seek medical help. Most doctors do not understand or treat the root of the problem and offer relief that masks the feelings even further, sometimes creating a bigger down spiral problem. I am not against medication when necessary, or there is a clinical imbalance, but in my own experience and opinion, that was not the answer for me. I knew there was a better way; I knew there was something deeper I needed to find in my heart. Why am I writing about this? This was not necessarily the plan, but I truly believe it is a very relevant topic. Especially now during mental health awareness month. So many people feeling lost, confused, and claustrophobic after COVID.

I started this blog to try and understand my feelings and allow myself a space to express my thoughts and document my blessings. Sometimes it is difficult to see what is in front of you and count your blessings. Even worse, and what I was going through, I knew I had everything to be happy, and I was just not feeling it, making myself feel worse and like I was taking things for granted. So I set out to blog and document the little things in life, to stop and notice and take joy in life's simple pleasures.

As I sought and searched, I came across information about mindset, spirituality and I started studying both clinical and spiritual aspects that affect the mind. I became fascinated with how they correlate. I grew up in a religious environment, and many of the mindset and spiritual principles outside the church were highly frowned upon. I started finding scriptures about the renewal of the mind and reading about neuroscience, and it all came together for me. It made so much sense, and I started building my mindset muscle and finding a closer relationship to my higher power. FASCINATING, to say the least, to me. Then one day, everything came together, and I started going to vision board events but soon realized that they often do not explain why you are doing this or how it works. The concept poured to me like a divine download, and I created Vision Board 101 for Ladypreneurs. I took a certification course through Udemy, and I got certified as a therapeutic art life coach, which includes creating and facilitating the creation of vision boards among other forms of art to help clients heal, reduce stress, and use positive affirmations and imagery to visualize positive changes in their lives. Vision boards are a powerful tool to help create the vision of our lives, hopes, and dreams and to set specific goals. I have learned through this process that the timing does not have to be perfect, that I do not have to be perfect, I only have to be one step ahead of someone that is going through what I went through, and I can share my experience and knowledge to help them along the way. Just like this blog, perhaps my course is not perfect yet, but I can start making progress and learning as I go and share my experiences even in the messy middle. We do not all "arrive" the same way.

Part of my course offers different types of vision and/or inspiration boards, and I find that sometimes an inspiration board is a great step to get your creative juices flowing; before diving into deeper visions for your future, you must be in a positive state of mind, and an inspiration board is less intimidating and more fun to make. You just pick images and messages that inspire you, spark joy and motivate you, and you arrange them more in a free-flow style. This board is to raise your vibration and put you in a good mood when you see it. One of the main principles of creating these boards is making sure that you are open and in a good state of mind when you create them. You can see the steps on this blog where I shared what I have learned about vision boards. I later refined my thoughts with the course I created, and I plan on writing an ebook about it.

Here is my inspiration board - I hope it inspires you to create your own. What I wanted to focus on with this board is mainly balance. I want to stop regretting the years I feel I "lost" trying to find answers. I know now it was meant to be, but I also want to reverse and restore the perceived damage to my body, mind, and spirit. I trust that God can restore the years I felt lost and make my latter days much better than my former years. I also wanted to remind myself that I can make a difference and influence women positively. I want to remind myself that I am constantly guided and protected and that the desires of my heart are my birthright because God put them there. All I have to do is turn the light to them and allow the path to be lit for me to follow with intention and faith.

Ups and downs

2021-05-24T21:49:00.004-07:00

Photo by Zane Lee on Unsplash

I had a rough day today. I started to write a couple things, could not really articulate a cohesive thought. Tired, sleepy, I did create my inspiration board yesterday. I'll share tomorrow.

Life happens - keep going

2021-05-23T11:54:00.006-07:00

So yesterday my plan was to sit down and spend some quality time creating. That was my plan, but then I realized that I truly wanted to do some of the things I have been meaning to do around the house. I work full time and often get home from work, and have other activities I tend to my team or do lives for my business, or sometimes I simply try to rest because I get out of the house pretty early. I often wake up around 3:45am because I know my intention is to get up at 4:30am most days. My doggie Charlie is usually the culprit for waking me up at that time because he wants to go potty, he probably feels I am half awake anyway and also animals are creatures of habit which is another thing we can learn from them. So long story short I did not blog yesterday, I knew I still had to do it, but truly realized it more intently after I had finished dinner. We usually do not eat so late, but yesterday I literally went to the store after doing some chores around the house, laundry, deep clean the bathroom, and a thorough sweep and mop around the house. I went to the store around 7:30pm, dinner was done until around 9pm and we did not end up eating up until around 10:45pm, super late for us, but it was Saturday so it was ok. Laying on the couch after and listening to music with my hubby, I truly realized I had not blogged but decided not to do it. I made the decision because we were living in the moment, but I did not keep my word. Do I beat myself up or do I give myself grace? I think it is about balance.

This whole exercise is about finding balance in my life, but keeping consistent and building the discipline muscle to do what I say and say what I do. So all I can do today is blog, fess up, but move on. On the one hand I feel good about cleaning some of the things I really wanted to take care of this weekend, and do the laundry, I have come a long way about laundry. Another story to tell at another time around that, but I got it done and I feel good. I cooked a late dinner, had some drinks and listened to music with my hubby, it is truly about the details. THE NAME OF THIS BLOG.

Today is Sunday - I have no plans, no timelines, no deadlines. Today is about relaxing and doing what I want to do. I am going to work on an inspiration board before diving into the vision board, then go to storage and grab some of my vision board items, take care of taking a picture I need to upload to my poshmark closet. This is just me thinking out loud but setting my intent for the day. Everything in creation has structure - we must listen to the hints life gives us. I have been seeking structure in my life for years or structure is seeking me. Sure, I have structure in some areas already; it is necessary to live and thrive, but I have found that we can live at our highest potential when we stop and assess what and which areas need structure in our lives and focus on one area at a time until we build a whole new beautiful, strong thing called our best life as opposed to living in autopilot and out of habits that are not serving us.

I am excited, to build healthy habits in my life, I truly believe structure has been seeking me for years. I also believe this is the main reason my soul lead me to this blog. To build structure, the habit of creating, adding value to the world and to stop, noticing, making a pause to count my all my blessings. I will persevere, I will not look at all the time that has lapsed since I begun writing this blog. I have gone through so much transformation over the last 10 years - nothing was in vain, it was all meant to be.

The vision is in your heart

2021-05-21T21:21:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow will be the day I finally listen to one of those whispers and gather all of my vision board materials and have the actual creative process. Follow my own method and re-visit my notes. I will spend better part of the day creating. Those whispers are there for a reason, the more we ignore them and suppress them the louder they get and if we continue to ignore them anxiety sets in, then depression. This is the main reason why this happens, we are not allowing our true self expression flourish. Life keeps sending hints, so we must learn to be still and listen to them. I am setting out to do just that.

Culture of Progress

2021-05-20T20:52:00.000-07:00

Procrastination, perfectionism, lack of time mentality all masks for fear. I am learning as I go to cultivate a culture of progress, even if its tiny steps like blogging free flow for 30 days straight not even stopping for grammatical errors. Yes I'll go back and clean them up, but I am not letting that stop me from blogging every day. What did I learn today? Well I am learning in the past two days about sales, about the importance of being connected to what it is you are offering, and leading with service. I am fascinated to learn the art of the sale, and to get rid of those old beliefs that sales are scummy and bad. On the contrary, sales are necessary to make this world go round. We are constantly selling even if we don't even know it, in how we present ourselves to the world, the things we consume and recommend, the places we go and share with others. The difference is making sure that as a business person you ensure that you add value to your customers and that both sides of the transaction benefit. Win win. Another thing I am learning is that knowledge is to be shared, so yes I am absorbing all this knowledge and taking notes, but I am also sharing this with my team and on my social media to provoke thought and perhaps add value to those who are interested in what I want to say-this is what is called a knowledge broker. A knowledge broker, absorbs the knowledge and shares it or it finds knowledge and makes it available to those who want to learn about that specific topic. So today I felt great about all the things I am learning and have learned in the recent past and thinking about what my next steps are going to be. To be honest I still feel a little scattered and all over the place; like this blog, but I have ideas, I have dreams, I have life experiences I want to share, I WANT TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

As I was looking back to this blog I noticed I used a bunch of pictures from the internet, I did not know any better. So I created some of the messages myself and replaced them with my own designs. I feel better about that, I also noticed grammatical errors. I will go back and try to clean those up as well, but I am not letting that stop me from moving forward. As I was looking back to my previous posts I saw that my post about vision boards had quite a bit of views. I truly feel in my heart that it was a spark of divine inspiration. The way I organized my thoughts just flowed to me and it felt so right. I created a course, and an experience teaching ladypreneurs how to create a vision for their lives and their business combining, divine intuition, brain science and sensory immersion into the process. I worked diligently and with love to create it and even had a test group preview it. I learned a lot about refining the rough edges and was super excited about launching this fun, girly and effective program and teach women in business how to include the perfect square of life into their vision. (Health, Wealth, Love and Self Expression). One of my attendees said it was like a "spa for the mind" and that's exactly what I was going for! This was all going to launch in 2020 and now we know what happened. I am not giving up tho- still listening to the hits of the universe. Seeing all those views really inspired me to keep going to pick it backup and refine it. Perhaps write a small e-book, then offer this experience both in person and live now that things are opening back up. This challenge is really helping me get my creativity flowing again. I am excited for what's to come - not all who wander are lost. It is now May 22 and I have been feeling the tug to create my own vision board, I must listen to my inner voice. Perhaps I will videotape myself in the creative process and go through the steps to refresh my memory. It all seems like it was an out of body experience, did I really create that? Seems like ages ago. I'll keep going and continue to practice imperfect action and cultivating that culture of progress. Till tomorrow

Analysis Paralysis

2021-05-19T14:45:00.004-07:00

Analysis paralysis is definitely a thing. Did you know that perfectionism is a cop out and a mask for fear? So many of us do not live at our highest potential simply because we are afraid to start. I am one of those people who has a million ideas, hopes and dreams, I collect books, conferences, and knowledge in general but somehow feel paralyzed to do anything with it. Why? I get paralyzed after a perceived "failure" at my attempts. How many of us give up because things do not work exactly as we planned or hoped for? I know that I have genuine attempts to start something great and give up way to soon. But guess what? I am not giving up! I know better, and I know that those perceived "fears" are just excuses keeping me from discovering what I am truly capable of. Failures are just guideposts to our ultimate destination, how else will we discover the promise land if we do not travel the desert? This is one of the main reaasons I have challenged myself to blog for 30 days straight. Then I will move to other challenges, and build on those until I can tackle those big ticket items I have on my list. Finish a course I bought two years ago and get a certification I bought a prep course for about a year ago. It is time to take imperfect action.

Figuring it out

2021-05-18T18:08:00.007-07:00

The beauty of google. I simply googled free countdown clocks and voila! found one here: www.timeanddate.com and installed on the blog just to make myself accountable and give myself a visual reminder that I am able to accomplish this task of blogging for 30 days. Check it out to the right of this entry. Nothing fancy but I did it! I realize that I am blogging free flow, not really structuring thoughts or even sentences, but the point is that I am actually allowing myself that free flow in ideas. So I realized that just by taking action and being intentional I am allowing myself to create. I was at work this morning and had to pull out a piece of papper because I was mapping out some thoughts. I have felt stuck literally for years and it has only been due to not taking action. This feeling of being stuck and not taking action in the things I want to do, has made me anxious and depressed. Through out this journey I have gained so much insight and knowledge...but I have held myself back, and sabotaged my own progress. Why? Fear

Fear to find out truly what my full potential is, fear of not being perfect and not knowing what I am doing, fear to let myself down again or feel like a failure. Honestly Covid really was a blessing in disguise, becasue it allowed me to face my fears head on and to learn to truly surrender, and most importantly do the very thing I set out to do when I started this blog. Take the time to count my blessings and notice the little things.