just your average jo

St. Patrick's Day Run 2014

2014-03-25T14:32:00.001-06:00

This was our FIFTH year doing the St. Patty's day race. I can't believe it. (It was race #5 for Cameron and #3 for Eli. I don't know why I didn't make it #1 for Mim... I guess I'm gender biased.) But I'm NOT! Because I cheered super loud when the first three finishers were all girls! I was so impressed. I've never seen that happen before. They smoked the boys.

Cameron

Eli (in the back)

Accepting their awards...

This year Richard and I decided to let the boys run on their own, without either of us along with them. Eli was really nervous about that, and we tried to psyche him up the whole way to the race by reminding him that he had done this race before and he knew the route and he was going to be just fine. When Richard and I both heard that they had changed the route we looked at each other in a bit of a panic. Don't they know they can't do that to OUR son!?!

But we explained the change, crossed our fingers and hoped for the best. He put on a brave face and off they went. I think having them run on their own actually helped them run faster. Cameron took first place in his age group and Eli took second place in his. To his advantage, Eli's age group was six and under, and he will be seven in a few weeks. (There I go qualifying his win...) But he was so proud and we were so proud too. Seeing Cameron succeed is fun, but he can be a little excessive with his celebration. Seeing Eli succeed is profoundly satisfying, because he is so subtle and meek.

Remarkable People

2014-03-14T09:09:00.001-06:00

Twice a month I do visits to members of the ward or neighborhood as part of my church service. Each time a different woman comes with me, another member of the ward who volunteers. Last night it was a woman name Alena. She is a somewhat recent convert to the church. She was born and raised in Baku, Azerbaijan. When she was 29, she and her six year old daughter drew green cards and moved to L.A. For two hours as we chatted with the women we visited I heard her stories. She is hilarious, artistic, and really positive. I kept thinking how delightful she was and how much I was enjoying spending my time with her.

It must be something about the prospect of moving across an ocean that is making me feel hyper-sentimental, but lately I've just been so grateful to be surrounded by remarkable people. We live in a culture of name-dropping. As if having a connection to someone who is well-known or famous earns us credit/value/recognition just for knowing them. Sometimes we drop names of people who don't even have good character, as if their fame alone, and our connection to it, is worth merit. I was thinking about this recently, and how I have a lot of remarkable people in my life that have never been in a movie or on a magazine cover. And why should I be more grateful to cross paths with Justin Bieber than with my next door neighbor who has personally done or arranged more acts of service for me than I can keep track of?

Last night when the topic of the conflict in Ukraine came up Alena mentioned how she avoids watching the news because that was her life twenty years ago. Soldiers in her streets, banging on her door, shooting guns in her town. A friend of mine always likes to say "there isn't a person you wouldn't love if you could hear their story."

During another visit someone mentioned that Alena played the piano beautifully and I told her I would love to hear her sometime. When I dropped her off she invited me in for homemade banana bread and some piano entertainment. I couldn't resist.

She played for probably 15 minutes. She never stopped. She didn't use a single sheet of music. I couldn't tell when one song ended and a new one began until the melody of the new song became familiar. She played the Beatles, Edelweiss, America the Beautiful, Disney movie soundtracks, hymns and pop songs.

The whole experience reminded me of another experience I had a few years ago where I found friendship in an unlikely place. (I just had lunch with Virg this week, in fact.) And last night as I drove home and thought about moving away from these remarkable people I remembered the words to that song. Make new friends, but keep the old...

Anyway- both of these experiences, both of these women, the way I feel when I am with them, reminded me of a quote from a book I'm reading. (Again.)

"It is as if God's... gladness multiplies through a progeny that will share in His own capacity for joyful activity and love-filled relationships...God's desire is to enlarge the sphere of human joy, and we discover the marvelous truth that our joy is His joy."

(Terryl & Fiona Givens.)

Even if the extent of my love-filled relationships is sometimes just an evening, my heart feels so grateful for a God who arranges them and feels joy in them as well.

Big News

2014-01-27T21:08:00.002-07:00

I started this blog in 2006. Seven years ago! That was way before blogging was cool. Wasn't it?

Anyway- the big news isn't that big to the few people who read this blog, but I'm putting it here for posterity. (And for you Brookie!)

Richard is taking a position with his firm in London. Yep! Hail to the Queen! We will be moving this summer when the kids get out of school, and we will live across that giant pond for two years. I am really excited. I am thrilled actually. I know the next few months will be stressful, and I know that making such a big change will be difficult and exhausting. I also know myself well enough to know that I am going to get hopelessly homesick sometimes.

In the meantime- my goal is get the blog caught up. (Haven't I been promising that forever?)

Cheers!

Fall Extracurriculars

2013-11-30T16:00:00.000-07:00

Miriam is my most cooperative model. She is always willing to strike a pose. I have so much fun with season changes, and although I don't claim to have any great handle on fashion, I really like putting together outifts, with her added input of course. I'm obviously biased, but she seems to me to have a perfect balance of style and personal preference, while still being practical and functional. Once in awhile she comes up with something a little wild- but it's fun to let her go with it.

For a couple days in a row there were MASSIVE rainstorms. Maybe not by South American standards, but they were epic by Idaho standards. The second evening I let the kids go out in their pajamas and splash their little hearts out. This was at the end of the downpour, and there may have even been rainbows emerging. What's not to love about storms? (Oh- broken trees. We had one of those.)

Eli had his first chance at sports this fall. There is a local sports league that is super low-key. It includes a 20-minute practice right before the game, and then a 40 minute game. The practice/games are always on Saturdays and always in the same hour block of time. It was perfect for him. This soccer mom loves low-commitment. Having a bit of a tortoise reputation, along with a slight lazy streak, Richard and I were both pretty shocked about how much effort and energy Eli played with. He took it seriously. Despite the relaxed stance he is taking in this photo- he really did a good job at goalie.

Miriam started pre-school this fall. We are doing another co-op with five other girls and one boy. Paige, Lila, Addie, Klara, Aubrey and Brock make up her classmates. Saying she loves it would be an understatement. She is Miss Social and begs for play-dates every day after preschool. She is the youngest in the group and I think doesn't quite have the alphabet skills of her peers, but she doesn't seem to mind.

This year was Cameron's last year of flag football. There were many parental discussions about whether or not to let him play tackle football next fall, he is small for his age and would have been up against kids twice his weight. Fortunately London made that a moot point!

This was his third year playing with the same group of boys, and their coaches Fred and Marcus (and Richard of course!) did a good job with them. Cameron mostly played defense and it was always fun to see the satisfaction on his face when he would make a "tackle", AKA get a flag. They went undefeated and were honestly an entertaining team to watch. And I don't mean that in a comical way, as it sometimes goes in kids sports. They executed legit plays and I'll never forget Max for his interceptions and QB passes, and Grayson's awesome catch in their last game.

And Simon. He just grew. And stole our hearts.

Playing on the "KidPad", which is my old iPhone that suffered death by cupcake.

My extracurricular activities this fall included Fly Management and physical therapy. I hurt my knee during my Ragnar in late June but I didn't realize it because I took the month of July off from running and spent the month of August trying to figure out what happened. The physical therapy seems to have worked, the side effect being that my PT told me I needed to branch out. Less running and more of other sports. So I try to hit a yoga class when I can. I could write a whole post about yoga. Maybe I will...

Miriam had a field trip to the pumpkin patch that Simon tagged along on. Ever since then, when we drive past the big red barn on Linder, both Miriam and Simon shout "MY FIELD TRIP!"

Fall was exhausting for all of us. It's both exciting and demanding to get back into the routine of school and after-school activities. Eli started doing recreational gymnastics with Miriam once a week after school. And Cameron picked back up with scouts once a week too. I also found a willing piano lesson teacher in the form of a high school girl in our ward who is very musically talented and conveniently lives within walking distance from our house, so Eli and Cameron do that once a week too. Like sands in the hour glass, so are the days of our (crazy and busy) lives.

Magnificent Motherhood

2013-11-21T09:39:00.002-07:00

At the risk of being judged a bad mother by all who read this, I share the following heartbreaking story.

*************

Getting Cameron and Eli off to school in the morning is the second most stressful time of the day. (The MOST stressful time of day is what we call the witching hour. The hour between dinner and bed when any patience I started the day with has long left me and instead of putting my children to bed I am putting the circus to bed. 87% of head wounds in this household happened during the witching hour.)

So when Miriam came to me yesterday morning in the chaos of gloves, signing school papers and packing lunches and told me she needed to go potty, I just told her to go. I said it nicely, but lately she's been wanting me to do everything for her. (I miss the defiant independence of the two year old! Did I just say that?) I told her calmly that I couldn't take her to the bathroom and she would need to go herself.

As I zipped coats and hollered at Eli to hurry up, my battle with Miriam escalated. The thing is, when I yell at the boys, I get what I want. I feel lousy afterward, but it's effective regardless. It's not my best parenting, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So I yelled at Miriam

"GO TO THE BATHROOM!!! Or we'll leave without you!"

She shut down. Not effective. She burst into tears and yelled back at me. Feeling all the stress and frustration of a tardy mother who is the carpool driver, I grabbed her, set her on my bed, herded the other stunned children into the van, locked the front door and drove away.

About the time I picked up Carter I started to panic. Cameron and Eli, feeling the tension, were fighting in the back seat and Eli was crying about his lost beanie. Can she unlock the deadbolt? Would she go outside by herself? Would someone see a three year old alone in the rain and call the police? Surely I would be arrested for neglect! And that would be so unfair because I'm not a bad mother! I drove past our house on the way to the school and no sign of Miriam on the lawn. (Of course I couldn't stop, we were LATE and if the kids miss the bell then I have to sign them in at the office which means I have to get out of the car in my pajama pants and be seen by other much more responsible adults.)

After I dropped off the boys the atmosphere in the van was quiet and still. Simon asked me

"Where's Meeyum?"
"She's at home."
"How come?"
"She didn't obey."
"She didn't obey?"
"That means she didn't listen to Mommy and do what I said."
"Oh."

Silence.

Lost in my own thoughts I almost missed it, but I didn't. I heard it. Simon's tender little whisper in the seat behind me. And it rocked my very soul.

"Meeyum, we almost home. Meeyum, we almost home. Meeyum, we almost home."

In that moment it became abundantly clear that it was ME who was the crazy one. From Simon's perspective it wasn't Miriam who was being totally unreasonable, it was ME. The adult. No one was going to feel sorry for ME, it was Miriam who deserved the sympathy. Of course she did. She's three and I'm 31.

When we got home I found Miriam right where I left her, only she was much calmer. Her little shoulders rose and fell as she tried to resume normal breathing. I pulled her on to my lap.

"Miriam. I'm so sorry I yelled at you." I had no more said her name before she broke down again.

"You hurt my feelings Mommy." She didn't say it to punish me. She didn't say it because she was angry. She just said it matter-of-factly as if to explain why she was presently so upset.

***************

Richard was telling me last night about how he used to feel so good when he would hear other adults tell his parents what a good boy he was. He recalled how his dad would say

"I'm just doing what I can to not screw him up."

Richard said he used to think that was a joke, but now as a parent who frequently fails, he (and I both) realized his dad was being absolutely genuine when he said it. We talked about how we are so grateful for the Savior's grace that will protect our children from our shortcomings. Because we really have great children and we really don't want to screw them up.

Halloween 2013

2013-11-04T13:57:00.000-07:00

So we have Eli on the left- a Storm trooper. He asked for weeks to be a storm trooper but I kept holding out that I could convince him to be a jedi again, like Cameron and Charlie. But he was adamant. So at the last minute my friend Kim came to the rescue with this perfect costume, it was exactly what Eli wanted. *Sigh of relief* Halloween wasn't ruined.

Cameron as a Jedi for year two. This was a brilliant scheme concocted by Adri. "You tell Cameron that Charlie is going to be a Jedi again and I'll tell Charlie that Cameron is going to be a Jedi again." It came off beautifully and it was one less child to outfit.

Miriam as the lovely Snow White- with a handmade dress by Baca Hall. Her fair skin was perfect although I was never able to successfully apply any red lipstick, like a red red rose. The wig was a big hit though.

And Simon, poor Simon, wearing a recycled storm trooper costume that had been rejected by Eli in years past for not being the "right" storm trooper costume. (Hence my relief this year when the "right" one was discovered.)

We had the pleasure of celebrating Halloween in Las Vegas/Henderson this year, which was a pleasure indeed! Although the locals thought I was crazy in just long sleeves it was balmy for us Idahoans. People left their front doors open or even sat out on their porches and driveways to hand out candy. It was quite festive and the kids had a grand ol' time trick-or-treating it up with their cousins.

The only Halloween tragedy this year was that after the kids left their excess candy in their bags on the porch, and the Switch Witch came to exchange it for books, a criminal in the making stole Eli's Star Wars character encylopedia out of his bag. Right off the front porch, in the wee hours of the morning. It was a real let-down but the Switch Witch compensated him for his loss.

Then...a few days later...there were these amazing brownies... made with chunks of confiscated Halloween candy...

Fallish Things

2013-11-01T15:29:00.000-06:00

Trees get bigger. Bigger trees=More leaves. Leaves=FUN!

There is something seasonally delightful about raking leaves on a warm autumn day. And there were no shortage of warm days this fall. But by the third or fourth day, delight is lost. Even for the kids, who were made to be my labor force. Stuffing leaves in bags is not a one-person job. Fortunately I took these pictures on the first day of leaf raking.

I had extra motivation from Cameron and Eli though, because they wanted a leafless football field. They spent HOURS outside playing football this fall. I was so grateful for the warm weather, so grateful they enjoy being outside, so grateful they play together, etc. When we introduced ourselves to some new neighbors at church they said

"Oh okay. You're the parents of the boys who are always playing football." Some other neighborhood friends and ward members will sometimes pull over as they drive past and say hello to the boys, or cheer them on.

Ducks

2013-10-02T13:58:00.000-06:00

A friend of mine shared this article with me and I loved the analogy of the duck. Above the surface the water is peaceful and serene. The duck even looks composed and content. But down in the water, under the surface, the duck is kicking her webbed feet with fervor to keep moving.

I’ve long tried to keep my blog real, I’ve never wanted to use it as a tool to make everything above the surface look perfect and beautiful. But this last year, I have been frantically kicking beneath the water. In my efforts to stay afloat and keep my life in order, I haven’t had time or emotional energy for blogging. I also felt like a blog post was hardly an accurate representation of my life beyond the laptop. Well, with the exception of posts like this one.

I hope to return to blogging- which might be a monumental task to catch up. But thanks for reading, thanks for asking about the blog, and thanks for whatever role it is that you play in my slightly dysfunctional, majorly chaotic life. I apologize if my relationship with you has suffered in the last year as I’ve been consumed by motherhood and self.

First Day of School 2013

2013-08-28T15:45:00.000-06:00

Because it makes sense to skip forward a year, right?

This kid was so pumped to go back to school. Of course he's way too cool to admit that. He always played it off like all the other kids. But the tetherball was calling his name! His teacher this year is different than any teacher he has ever had before. She's tough. And he's sensitive. It's been a rough go so far. I didn't know anything about her, but I don't think I would have done anything differently. It's a tough balance in parenthood, trying to create environments where your children will thrive, while also teaching them to be flexible and adapt to difficult circumstances. I know he is learning a lot from Mrs. Hoiland.

In Eli's case I decided to step in and try to set him up for success. When class lists were posted I saw that he was in a larger class, with neither of his two friends, and a new teacher. The new principal of their school is in our ward, and I was worried about him thinking I was trying to get special treatment, but I just really thought Eli would do better in the other class. He is timid and being in a class with some familiar faces, including Miss Hall who was Cameron's kindergarten teacher, just gave me more peace of mind. It turned out to be an easy switch and I'm so grateful it worked out. I love our little community in Kuna, and I love that Eli is having a teacher Cameron had.

Didn't I say something about hamming it up? And reserved pleasure?

RAGNAR: Round 2 - Wasatch Back

2013-06-30T16:28:00.000-06:00

This was actually my second Ragnar, and I loved my first Ragnar as much as I loved this one. I just blogged about this one first because I'm going backwards and this one is the freshest in my memory. Maybe it will help rekindle Ragnar Las Vegas memories...

*****************

Years ago I met my friend Molly on an online forum on CafeMom. It seemed like we had everything in common and we started emailing. Then we started texting. And then phone calls.

When Molly's Ragnar team needed some runners she asked me if I'd be interested and then we roped in our friend Jeni. (Who we also met online.) Erica and Josh were Molly's friends, and part of the original team, but at the last minute Josh's friend bailed so we recruited Chantel who was already in Utah. (And a marathoner!)

It's hard to explain virtual friends. And how and why they became "real" friends. And how something about that transition has made a friendship that is totally honest, real, and vulnerable. Maybe because I had nothing to lose? Maybe because there were no expectations about what kind of person I was "supposed" to be? Maybe because Jeni and Molly are naturally open and forthcoming. But with Jeni and Molly I have no inhibitions. I had also spent a lot of time reading Chantel's blog, and she had worked with Richard briefly during an internship. We had emailed too and our "virtual" friendship became real and meaningful quickly. I now consider them among my most loyal and dearest friends. They don't know my family much at all, and we've never even lived in the same city. But we have long, in depth conversations about everything from politics to faith, marriage, childhood, parenthood and emotional health. These women were answers to prayers and friends I didn't know I needed.

Anyway-

Spending a weekend in a minivan is to a friendship like wind is to a flame. It strengthens the strong and extinguishes the weak. Or something like that...

I LOVE Ragnar races. I really love them. I love getting to know people in intense emotional situations. (Can you say crazy adrenaline highs, total emotional meltdowns, sheer exhaustion, and ravenous hunger irritablity?) There is so much solidarity. SO much authenticity. No pretense. I had the time of my life.

So as it turned out our team was five females and then Josh. Josh has to be one of the most kind, chivalrous and patient men I've met.

Bright and early Ragnar morn. From Left to right- Jeni, Jo, Josh, Chantel, Molly, Erica. We were Van 1- so we kicked it off. Erica ran first, she is an experienced Ragnarian and she is legit. She is fierce and tough. but loyal and supportive. No one cheered like Erica. See below.

With Erica and the bull-horn, wherever we went we were the life of the party. (Like it or not. Which was sometimes not. Mood swings are status quo.) But team support is the kind of thing that makes my throat get tight and sentimental tears start to fall. Even after two exhausting days and 19 miles of running.

We got our new van just in time for Ragnar. Despite my inability to operate it's complex (not really) technology it suited us well. Close proximity made for hilarious/intense/emotional conversations. And it only took a month and some major elbow grease to get off all the car paint.

The scenery was awesome. The race went along the Wasatch Back, through small towns and farms and reservoirs and other things we couldn't see because it was night.

The other team was all women, leaving Josh the lone man. Unfortunately I didn't get to meet them or know them very well. But they had the toughest legs (pun intended)- so cheers for them!

This was my first leg. It was my toughest, which didn't make much sense because it was my shortest and it was flat. But it was hot, and I think the elevation was really hard on me. My second leg was okay, it was in the evening and also relatively flat. My last leg was my longest, and had the most incline, but for some reason it was my best. I whined about it all weekend, leading up to it. I was super anxious about it and wondered what I had been thinking. But maybe by then my body was adjusting to the elevation, and I knew it was my last leg so I could leave it all out on the table. I had major adrenaline surges that carried me through and I OWNED it. If I do say so. I injured my knee but didn't realize that until a month later when I tried running again. It was worth it though. It was one of my best running moments of my running history.

Sporting some festive night-time accessories.

Chantel's running style is a perfect model of her approach to life. She is quietly confident, without guile, and so unassuming that those who encounter her can't help but be totally impressed. She is unquestionably competent and unbelievably gentle and compassionate to others.

It also has to be said that Jeni ran this Ragnar just a couple years after being totally paralyzed from the waist down. After an emergency surgery she had the problem resolved, but running still requires serious strength, and a deliberate and conscious effort to lift her left foot with each step.

The whole gang in the van while I ran. What happens in the minivan stays in the minivan. Including iPod idol. Google it though. And then play it. And then laugh REALLY hard at your friends.

Molly was the glue that held our team together, the common link between us all. The diplomat and decision maker and sense of humor initiator. She never lets me take myself too seriously and isn't afraid to call anyone out on obnoxious behavior. And since this blog post apparently turned into a brag-fest about my Ragnar teammates- Molly is employed at Stanford and humors me when I think I'm being intellectual.

If I'm being totally honest - which these friends would encourage me to be- I sometimes have doubts about God's hand in my life. MY life. Jo Bird's life. How much does He really do for me personally? But when I think about the way I met these women and the way we became friends I know there was divine influence. Love you guys so much.

So Long Family Van

2013-06-04T13:30:00.000-06:00

We've been talking about getting a new van for awhile.

This last January was the coldest January since 1987 or something like that. There were days at a time where it didn't break freezing. The heater in the van wasn't quite heating so on the really cold days I would put all the kids's coats in the dryer to warm them up, then put them on really fast and load up to drive to the kids to school.

That is just the beginning of the things that didn't work in the van.

So a few weeks ago after it started making a new noise, one that was embarrassing when you drove through a parking lot with the windows down, (with the windows up you could forget the high pitched squeal everyone else was hearing) we decided to amp up our search. We did our Consumer Reports research and scoped out Craigslist for a few more weeks before we test drove a car.

After spending one evening, and test driving one car, we decided car shopping was not something we did well together. Richard buys a car like Bill Cosby. Play hardball. Don't give anything up. Take your time. ALWAYS walk off the lot.

I buy a car like a woman who has no time and who is easily impressed.

"Lumbar support! Fantastic! Our old van leaks oil! Bluetooth technology! Exciting! Our old van has a broken parking brake! Automatic doors! LOVE it! The gas gauge doesn't work in the old van!"

I was giving everything away about our trade-in and I was an easy sell. I fell in love with that first van. When I realized Richard had no intention of buying THAT particular van I felt disappointed and delegated the car shopping to him.

Fast forward a few weeks and we had hardly said ten words to each other about the new car situation. I get a text

"I just bought a van."

Then a phone call.

"You have 30 minutes to clean out the old van and bring it in to pick up your new one."

So the kids and I frantically cleaned our stuff out of the old van while visions of that episode of Wonder Years passed through my mind, making me all kinds of sentimental. I cried on the way to the dealership.

It was a good thing that I only had 30 minutes to mourn the loss of that van. That van was the third generation of the Hall Family Dodge Caravans. All three drove across the country and back. They all were the vehicle of so many family memories. And just like the kitchen table, we inherited it making our own memories inside. Three of our four babies came home in that van.

I don't have it in me to write out all the miles and moments known to that van. It will be missed. But I gotta say, the lumbar support really is fantastic.

Camalamarooski

2013-04-11T11:54:00.000-06:00

Cameron turned eight this year. EIGHT is a big one around here. He started Scouts and his baptism is scheduled for May 4th. He couldn't be more thrilled about his opportunity to be the center of attention. I think he's excited about the ordinance too.

Cameron is a sports announcer in the making. He lives, breaths, sleeps, reads all things sports. Driving in the car there is the constant hum of Cameron's color commentary from the back seat. It's intense people.

He is also Mr. Social, always wondering when we can invite people for dinner, when he can have a play date; making sure we attend every church and school activity. He loves to be busy with social things. He also loves structure, he asks me incessantly about what our "plan" is. What's our plan for lunch, what's our plan for the weekend, what's our plan for the day, the homework plan, the chores plan, the reading plan. Someday our little Mr. Organized is going to rock the spreadsheet.

Cam continues to have a hypersensitive conscience. He's the kind of kid that you just give him "the look" and he falls in line. He is prone to guilt and eager to please. (These are the things I know he gets from me, and it gives me a little anxiety worrying he will be insecure.)

He is also a bit of a manipulator. As demonstrated by the contract below, he exercises dominion over his desperate younger brother. He is the oldest child, I think bossy is written in his code.

Cameron does well in school, and we really feel so blessed by his genuine desire to do the right thing. Sometimes a little ego and self-absorption keep him from feeling empathy and compassion, but we're going to assume that will develop with age.

For his birthday he got a basketball hoop, a "real" one that he plays on the back patio for hours at a time. Before school, after school, whenever he can sneak away. It was well worth the $$ that's all I can say...

Scriptures from Baca and Grandpa Bird for the big #8. Let a new tradition be born!

There have been similar contracts about Eli keeping the room clean while Cameron is at school, and Eli choosing Madden 09 instead of MarioKart when it's his turn to pick the Wii game.

March madness has invaded my house. I'm finding homemade brackets everywhere.

Cameron and I went to see the Harlem Globetrotters together. He loved it, therefore I loved it by association.

Eli Eli Puddin' 'n' Pie

2013-04-11T10:49:00.000-06:00

Eli had a birthay- shout hooray!

When I pull out the hand-me-down clothes for Simon, enough time has gone by since Eli wore them that I am sometimes overcome with nostalgia, and the realization that time passes so quickly. Because of the gap in years between Eli and Miriam, I feel like Eli and I had a really great year when he was two. So now that Simon is two, and wearing those cute little clothes, I have been reminiscing about those days with my little buddy Eli.

And now he is six!

Eli is smart. He is shy. He is detail-oriented and either focused to a fault or totally distracted. He is a wandering soul, easily absorbed in the world around him. He is the kid who literally stops to smell the roses. He is sensitive. But hell hath no fury like an angry Eli. He would do anything for Cameron, or any of his siblings. He is nurturing and kind. He will play for hours by himself in his bedroom while the little ones nap. I love the days when he doesn't go to kindy because he keeps Mim and Si entertained.

A few months ago as the kids climbed in the van after school Cameron shouted to a boy in his class something about the boy's "annoying sister" - who happens to be in Eli's class. Cameron started wailing and this is how it went

Cameron: Eli hit me for no reason!
Eli: No I didn't....There was a reason!

The reason turned out to be that it bothered Eli that Cameron had said something rude about his classmate.

On another trip home from school Eli informed us that he was going to go to 1st grade for reading groups.

Cameron: Are there any other kids in your class going?
Eli: Nope.
Cameron: Are there any other kindergartners going?
Eli: Nope.
Cameron: Are you going to be shy?
Eli: Nope.

Richard and I are banking on Eli's intelligence to compensate for what he lacks in size, to help him have self-confidence.

Eli is myterious, and parenting him feels like a crapshoot. He can be hard to discpline because it's hard to find consequences that really reach him. But a few things we have discovered that he really cares about, that we can use as leverage are nickels, Richard's nightly ritual of reading Narnia, the Wii, and all things Star Wars.

Because speed is not his strength we thought Chess would be just the kind of game for him. For his birthday he also got a Star Wars X-Wing model, a couple books, and some Star Wars legos.

Obviously we love our Eli-Pie and love the way he stretches our limits and shifts our paradigms.

At the wedding of "Q" and "U". Eli sometimes wears his gloves for hours at at time.

The R2D2 valentine box. He was so proud.

Easter... again. Every year it comes. Imagine that.

2013-04-04T16:41:00.004-06:00

Is there anything in life that isn't some sort of balancing act? The sentimental, traditionalist, secular, sugar-addict part of me loves Easter. So does the spiritual part of me. It's tricky making holidays be about what they are supposed to be about while still enjoying the... um... commercialized part of them.

I had a hard time with that last sentence. Is there any justification for consumerism?

What with Facebook and Pinterest it's super easy to get caught up in the adorable and fun ideas for holidays. So when I saw an article floating around making a request to mothers/parents everywhere to chill out a bit with the holiday festivities, I was worried it was going to rain on my over-achiever parade. It wasn't like that so much, though. It just politely asked that together we all tone it down a bit to settle the expectations of our entitled children. For example, do we really need a leprechaun to bring gifts for the kids? Can we just stick with wearing green on St. Patty's day? Fair enough.

So we combined plastic eggs full of chocolate and jelly beans with our Resurrection Rolls from last year and had a wonderful morning.

Whatever we decided to do on Easter, we couldn't have asked for a more glorious spring day. It was so beautiful. Just like these hooligan children of mine.

Happy Birthday Simon

2013-04-03T18:09:00.000-06:00

Miriam was only eight months old when I found out I was pregnant with Simon. The idea took some getting used to. Even in the first few weeks of his life Richard and I were still feeling like we weren't ready. Now, he is a fixture around here, and a delightful one.

On the night of his birthday a week ago, I lied in bed and couldn't believe it had been two years. My baby is two years old! Yikes!

Simon is a character. In the picture above he is doing his new, slightly neurotic, habit of picking at his lip with his fingers. He does it when he's nervous or shy.

He is still a snuggle-bug and will lay his head on my should when I go to get him up in the morning or after nap. Every night at family prayer Simon and Miriam fight over who gets to sit on my lap.

He loves glasses/goggles and hats. He puts them on whenever he finds them and wears them for hours.

Eli was the original "Horrible Headwound Harry" but Simon has taken over and set new records.

He loves puzzles. "Puzz!" He shouts at me all the time "Hep you!" (Which is actually what he says when he means "Help me!") He spends a lot of time on puzzles, which is a lifesaver at dinner time.

Up until recently Simon has always been totally content with a little attention. With Simon, a little attention yields a giant reward. But lately he's been a little more demanding. He's starting to have some mini-meltdowns, which at this age are simply adorable. Look at that face! Richard and I have discovered that a few minutes in his crib will cause him to forget what he was upset about and then when you go in to retrieve him he is just happy to have your attention again.

He is a little thrill-seeker. We took the kids sledding and Simon was by far the one who enjoyed it the most. That might explain his perpetually bruised forehead.

He loves playing with any of the siblings, and has no problem playing babies with Mim.

Simon has done a fantastic job of consolidating the syllables in words and names. Why say in three syllables what can be said in one or two?

Misha (the dog)- "Sha"

Baca - Ga

Grandpa - Grum

Shoes On - Shon

I don't know - Ah-no

Eli- Yai

Cameron - Can

Miriam- Min

Simon is utterly adorable when he is not operating under the influence of his older sister. And even then, when they are making me crazy with their mischeivous antics, I can't resist kissing his cheeks.

So even though it sounds cliche, and even though we were unprepared and I still feel like I have never quite regained control of my life since he was born, I really really

really

couldn't imagine life without this little guy.

wee babes

2013-03-20T17:26:00.000-06:00

There is nothing to signal spring quite like baby lambs and goats. Baca Hall took Cameron and Eli out to a friend's to see the sweet little animals. As typical, Cameron jumped right in and Eli was a little more cautious. But Eli's apprehension is no indication of his heart, I'm sure he loved the creatures as much as anyone.

My mom told me that there were some baby lambs whose mother either died or was unable to care for them, so the owner of the animals introduced the lambs to a mother goat and she took them right in.

I'm sure there is a great analogy in that, but analogies aren't my thing. Regardless, I found the story heartwarming.

From the phone - February

2013-02-28T11:12:00.000-07:00

I discovered it's much easier to get the pics from my phone on my blog if I just blog from my phone. But that's a pain to do all the time so I'll just do a blog feature of "From the Phone." (I'm sooo creative,huh?)

P.S. If you follow me on Instagram this might be redundant.

At the library. We sometimes read books but usually just go for the "Music and Movement" class where Miriam feels like a performer.

Lazy Sunday afternoon. I can't believe this ever happened. Talk about a facade!

Eli's Artoo-Detoo Valentine box. (Go ahead and debate the spelling Star Wars geeks.)

The wedding of "Q" and "U". An annual tradition at Reed Elementary. Clever, clever vows.

Just another day in the life of Simon.

That's my hipster Eli. The tie MUST go on the outside he says.

Martina McBride and George Strait. We learned that George had a LOT of popular songs before we started listening to him.

My annual haircut. Why can't I seem to get more regular hair care?

That's enough for now. My thumbs are tired.

February: The Most Bland Month Boise Can Offer

2013-02-27T20:12:00.000-07:00

Ohhhhh I hate February in Boise. Gone are the crisp blue-sky mornings of January. It's just 28 (or 29 during leap year) days of INVERSION. Fortunately my birthday falls in February. But I'll get to that later.

I guess since Simon's pizza was cheese-less his smile is more genuine. Cameron, Eli and Miriam have cheese oozing out of their pores. I'm not sure what instigated this photo session but the minute I get out the camera and take a picture of one of the kids, the rest have to have their moment to shine. As a side note, because I'm thinking of it, in Miriam's picture you can see the top of her Tangled microphone. The other day there was no school so I took the kids downtown to have lunch with Richard. Miriam carried her microphone with her everywhere that afternoon. It's a different demographic downtown, I get the feeling many of those people don't have much exposure to kids, let alone a family with four of them. We get attention whether we like it or not. But Mim likes it. She performed or posed for everyone who asked about her microphone. The girl is not shy.

Darth Vader

Yoda

Darth Maul

Eli is a project oriented kid, and for several weeks his projects were these homemade Star Wars masks. I really am quite proud of his creativity, but the masks were severely irritating my OCD. I have a zero tolerance for clutter, everything must have it's place and there was just no good place for these awkward creations. So I took some pictures to immortalize his hours of hard work before the masks went the way of the landfill.

We have been part of a babysitting group for several years now. One Friday night each month we take our turn being in charge of all the couples' children. When we started there were only six or seven kids. At one point we were up to 13 kids but then one of the families moved away and a smaller family replaced them. The other three Friday nights we get to go out, and have free babysitting. We love this arrangement, it's a brutal three hours once a month, but it's not even really that. And the kids love it too of course. On this particular evening Simon had to be quarantined to our bedroom because he had a cold. He ate snacks and watched cartoons on Netflix. He's adorable even when he's miserable. Note to self: Squinty eyes can be cute even when they are puffy and red, just smile!

This must have happened after the Busy Hands post. It happened twice that day. Simon and/or Miriam dumped out all the plastic little hairbands. I made them help me clean them up the first time, but since that lesson apparently wasn't effective, I just cleaned them up myself the second time.

Mim started gymnastics in February. I think I smiled the entire hour as I watched her the first day. She tried everything with gusto. She isn't super coordinated, but she makes up for it with enthusiasm. It was her first social experience too, and I think she felt so grown up having her own activity to tell everyone about.

This is either a movie-night or a cartoon-morning. Hard to say. I'm trying not to raise a bunch of couch potatoes but I think they would be if I let them.

Turning 31 is Anticlimactic

2013-02-17T15:31:00.000-07:00

So I wrote about the Whole30 back in February or something. After finishing that, all I wanted to do for my birthday was go bowling and eat the kind of food you find at bowling alleys. French fries and nachos made with processed cheese. Which we did. And it was as anticlimactic as turning 31. Processed cheese is still, well, gross.

Bowling however, is RAD.

Ohmygosh! Is Cameron making the duck face? #themomentyourkidiscoolerthanyou

And... #themomentyouhashtagtolookcooler

Before I know it he will be taking dozens of selfies with my old iPhone. Oh wait. He already does that.

Okay fine grumpy, I'll try with a child who adores me.

That's better.

Richard must be the parent he REALLY loves.

And I think that meets my quota for pictures of myself on this blog for the year. And only in February...

Busy hands

2013-02-16T09:11:00.000-07:00

At Miriam's three year well-child exam the Dr. asked about her disposition. I used the drawing paper as a representation of Miriam's disposition.

"She colored this in the 30 seconds after the nurse left and before you came in."

When I try to describe Miriam and Simon's mischievous dispositions to other people, my mind always draws a blank. So I decided to start keeping a log. These...disruptions... individually would just be an inconvenience, but collectively they test my sanity. They are incidents that Cameron and Eli either never did, or did so rarely that it was still cute.

Miriam found a kitchen rag in a pile of unfolded laundry and got it soaking wet, then took the dripping rag and "washed" everything in site. She did this the night before too, only it was a dirty rag she had found on the floor in the laundry room and she laid it, soaking wet on the living room carpet, only to be discovered after she went to bed and I was doing my nightly "pick-up-everything" ritual.

This also reminds me of the time Miriam got her hands on the Windex and sprayed every last drop of what remained in the bottle, all over the furniture, bedding, and walls of her bedroom.

When I fail to shower before the kids are out of bed I've found it to be safest to keep Simon in the bathroom with me. Today while I showered he took the 16 or so rolls of toilet paper and stacked them in towers around the bathroom.

As I type this Simon is trying to pluck the few fine hairs on the top of my foot. (Don't tell me you don't have hair on your feet. We've all got a little Hobbit in us, right?)

Three times in two days Simon emptied the contents of an old Crystal Light canister, which contains 1000 plastic hair elastics. And Miriam made a "snow angel" in them.

They frequently remove all the dvds from the armoire, dump the laundry out of all the hampers to use them as cars/boats/planes, and pull all the clothes off of Miriam's hangers. (Hers being the only hangers within their reach.)

Don't they sound horribly devious?!

It is part of their daily ritual to yank all the books off of the shelves of Cameron and Eli's bookcase. And sometimes in desperation I lock them in their bedroom while I cook dinner, always to discover that they have pulled every wipe out of the container and scattered them around the room.

These things occur too rapidly and too frequently for me to remember everything I ought to do to prevent them. But go ahead and call me a glutton for punishment because, really, some are so easily preventable.

Like Simon climbing in the bathtub fully clothed. Or Miriam putting every lotion or cream in Simon's hair.

And I'm still too devastated to say much about the giant gouge in my freshly stained table surface.

But I'm on a roll here...

There was the time Simon took the lid off the dog food bucket and tossed it with reckless abandon around the kitchen. (While stuffing a kibble or bit into his own mouth.) No drink on the coffee table goes unspilled. No cereal box undumped.

Where am I failing as a mother?

Miriam loves to take one bite of each apple or pear and leave them unfinished in the fruit bowl. And just days after her birthday she decided to make her new dollhouse "pretty" and colored it all with purple and green marker.

And one of the greatest mysteries of all around here, is how one of the pair got the tv remote inside the piano, and how I managed to understand/believe that it was actually in there when the only evidence was Simon's dimpled finger pointing at the piano.

And of course there are just the everyday messes, one of which involved putting all the toys in the crib, and my discovering it only as I'm trying to put the sleepy child in bed.

And the somewhat adorable venture, of Miriam and Simon each putting on a pair of my shoes in my closet, marching them down the hallway as if walking the runway, and then returning to the closet for a new pair, leaving the last pair on the living room floor.

And the not-so-adorable time Simon took a bite out of Richard's deodorant...

And then nauseating blow-outs like this. At Chik Fil A.

(Sorry, that one deserved a warning. I only took the picture to text to Richard to elicit sympathy. And now I do the same here: the other three children were unsupervised in the play-place. I had only wipes to work with, and naturally, only a few at that. I ended up tearing the onesie off with my bare hands - I attribute that to sheer adrenaline- and throwing it in the garbage.)

I've been feeling so baby hungry lately. I ache for a newborn. And then I wrote this blog post. And I realized that I might need therapy if I tried having another child. Forget that, I need therapy as it is.

Whole30 Diet

2013-01-31T10:36:00.003-07:00

I might be jumping the gun here, because I have to get through today, but I wanted to post my thoughts on the Whole30 "program" while they are fresh.

Feeling a little bit like I might be addicted to sugar, I decided at the new year I would try to give it up. I thought about throwing dairy and gluten in there too, to see if they were contributing to digestive troubles, but was undecided and uncommitted until I heard about the Whole 30. (Thanks Jensie.) You can read all about it here, please do, but I just want to share my thoughts about it.

The main principles are

-Eat mostly veggies, with meat (mostly lean meats like poultry and fish) throw in some fruit and a few oils and nuts/seeds.
-Eat three meals a day.
- No preservatives, and no squeezing your old round diet into a Whole30 compliant box.

So what did I think of it all?

- I have some seriously unhealthy eating habits. Before I started this, I never prepared a meal for myself and sat down to eat it. (Except at dinner.) I snacked all day, ate when ever I sat down to do anything (read, watch tv, computer), and was more or less non-discriminatory about what I ate. I also ate emotionally and out of boredom. (Not REAL boredom, that's unheard of. More like "I-can-eat-to-procrastinate-what-I-should-be-doing" kind of boredom.)

- Real food tastes good. I definitely missed things, I'll get to that. But most my meals were satisfying AND tasty. I never felt hungry after eating, and when I made the right effort at meal time I rarely felt hungry for a few hours.

- Pinterest SAVED me. I found so many good ideas and recipes on there, and found things I will be making indefinitely. (Homemade almond butter and mayo.)

- I did NOT notice that I slept better at night, maybe because Eli still had nightmares and Simon still cries in his sleep. Nor did I notice that I had more energy. And maybe that is because keeping up with the four kids demands any available energy. But I was a little disappointed about those two things.

- I DID lose weight, which wasn't necessarily my main goal, but a girl won't complain about dropping those last few baby pounds a couple months before her baby turns two years old.

- Along those lines, I have to add my anecdotal research to the pile. What I ate was a lot more important to weight loss than exercise. Last fall I was running a lot. On Saturdays I would do long runs, 8-12 miles, and I didn't lose any weight. That was very discouraging. I just didn't realize until this last month how bad my eating habits were. The first two weeks of this "program" I didn't even exercise (too cold/busy/sick) and I lost weight.

- It's hard to say if avoiding gluten and dairy helped with my digestive troubles, I didn't notice a difference. But I also found that eating too many nuts could cause the same problems. I guess it just goes back to moderation in all things. I didn't ever feel bloated or "stuffed" which helped my pants fit more comfortably around the waistline.

- What did I miss the most? I would have to gauge this by the things that were most difficult for me to resist, and it was definitely desserts/sugar. I was very strict with the plan, and tried not to feed my sweet tooth the first couple weeks. But by the third week I made a "dessert" for myself with nuts, cocoa, dates and strawberries. And I loved every bite of it. I also envied the oatmeal and toast my kids were eating for breakfast, and hopefully my new appreciation for whole grains will last awhile. And of course, the goat cheese I bought before I started this "diet" called to me every time I made a salad.

- Eating out wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. I only went out twice, to a seafood place and a mexican place, and had no trouble finding something filling, delicious and compliant.

- In order to stay motivated and read and listenend to a lot of things about the benefits of a healthy diet. This was also very imformative and helpful. I encourage anyone to embark on a food discovery journey.

- So what now? I know that practically speaking I won't sustain this diet forever. And I don't really have a desire to. Food is such a joy in my life, and variety is so important to that joy that I don't plan to give up grains, beans and dairy entirely. BUT I do plan to make vegetables a bigger part of my diet, and my family's.

- As for the immediate future, I plan to sit down to watch a movie and eat a bag of peanut butter M&Ms and popcorn tomorrow night. I also want to get french fries and FRO-YO on my birthday. But otherwise I'll just deal with each sweet temptation as it comes along, and try to make healthier choices for meals and snacks on a day-to-day basis.

- Mostly I just feel really satisfied. I feel like I accomplished something hard, which is always a big motivator for me to accomplish other things. I feel healthier, which is good for my self-esteem, and I feel like I could do this again.

Maybe.

January Leftovers

2013-01-31T09:37:00.000-07:00

I couldn't bring myself to go all the way back to a year ago, so I'm starting with 2013 and I'll get to the rest later. Maybe.

I'm not sure how global warming amounts to the coldest January on record in Boise, but I guess it does. Something to do with more extremes in temperatures I guess, but I'm no scientist. Did I already mention that the heater in the old van left much to be desired and on these freakishly cold mornings, when the temperature hovered around 11 degrees, I would throw the kids winter coats in the dryer to get them warm, and then at the last minute put them on for the quick drive to school? Oh I did? Sorry. I'm so glad we got a new van because this winter I think it's our dryer that's not up for the task.

We had one last night out with the Steven's before they returned from winter holidays back to Vegas. The boys were with Richard watching a football game and the other cousins had already left town. I think Miriam and Thea liked have some time to nurture their blossoming BFF status.

Is there such a thing as cabin fever where you're itching to get INSIDE a cabin? January is kick-off for Richard's busy season so one weekend I packed up the kids and we headed for the hills. It was so "Jo" I think I gave Richard a heart attack. Spontaneous, in the middle of winter, and I learned how to put chains on the van. It was an adventure but the kids ate it up. We rented a cabin and spent a few days doing puzzles, watching movies, playing board games and reading books. We also went sledding and drank a lot of hot chocolate. It was so fantastic I think it might be a new tradition.

Simon is such a deadly combination of daring, careless, and clumsy. But he loved the sled more than anyone. He laughed and laughed even after he wiped out a few times.

It was really cold outside. We couldn't stay out there for more than 30 minutes at a time. And one minute too long resulted in emotional break-downs

If there was a silver lining to the brutally cold January, it was these mornings. Of course the pictures don't do it justice, do they ever? But it was these glorious blue skies with these crystals that were sometimes an inch high on EVERYTHING. It really was breath-taking. I've never seen anything like it. At the time I had just finished reading Mansfield Park and I was reminded of Fanny, and how she never took nature's details for granted. Since she is a fictitious character and I couldn't call her up to share the moment with me, I settled for the next best and called my dad.

A LONG story about a simple headwound

2013-01-24T09:49:00.001-07:00

So I was on vacation the other night at the exotic resort of Winco, and I had just left produce, and was headed down the cracker aisle to grab the necessities (Belvita breakfast biscuits and popcorn.) when my phone began to ring. I try to avoid answering my phone in the grocery store because ever since the infamous "cupcake incident" I can only talk to people via speaker phone. This can be a little awkward in public. But it was Richard, and I thought he probably wanted me to add something to my list. That's not at all what he was calling about, and the young adoring couple in the aisle with me heard Richard calmly say

"Simon hit his head, and he probably needs stitches."

When you get this phone call about your first child, you drop everything and bolt out the door. If it's your second child, you calmly explain your situation to a store employee so they can return the items, and then you bolt out the door. If it is your third child you pay for what you have in your cart, and meet your husband at the hospital. And when it is your fourth child you go ahead and finish your shopping because these childless shopping opportunites are few and far between!

I'm mostly teasing, but not really. I called a neighbor to come sit with the other kids, told Richard to meet me at the ER, and grabbed a couple other much needed items before paying for my groceries and then bolting out the door.

Simon was a trooper in the ER. His camera "smile" is this sort of squinty-eye grimace, and Richard and I both chuckled at his stoicism, because despite his circumstance, he was doing his best to smile for the camera.

He ended up with six sutures. (Sorry Richard, I just love that word even if it sounds affected.) And it took me a while to finally get the whole story, but this is what I got.

The story goes, that while Richard was brushing teeth, Cameron was running the circus. The kids were (like they always are) hyper at bedtime, and doing all kinds of crazy antics. After Eli hurt his head, Richard issued a warning to the ringleader, that apparently went unheeded. This left the ringleader to hide after Simon's collision with the piano resulted in a bloody mess, because he felt personally responsible. Meanwhile Eli screamed about the blood and horror, and Mirim looked on with amazement and curiosity, quite enjoying the experience I think.

So fast forward six days, the designated time period before suture-removal, and on this brisk morning I took Simon back to the ER to have the sutures removed. I had Eli and Miriam with me, and the nurse, bless her heart, gave all the kids popsicles on our way out the door.

Squinty-eye grimace = Smile

The kids were all FREEZING the whole way home because the heater in our van doesn't work (a story for another day) and did I mention it was -2 degrees outside?

Less than two hours after suture removal (I know, I can't help myself) we found ourselves at the church, having an indoor playdate with some friends. It was another circus. With another casualty. I looked up to see Simon crying on the floor and saying "Owie owie owie." He had hit his head in exactly the same place and part of the wound had reopened.

Okay, time to put this story in hyperspeed.

I made all the necessary phone calls. I made a decision. I took more pictures. I drove to Walgreens and cried on the way there. I bandaged it. He ripped the bandages off. But no more stitches. No more popsicles. Just what will likely be a rad scar.

And here he is. The day after the second injury, smiling an almost normal smile. If you ask him about it he will point to his head and say
"Bonk."

And that is the really long story about the not-so-simple headwound.

SNOW!

2013-01-16T09:50:00.000-07:00

Simon did NOT like his boots. He cried when I put them on. They aren't really snow boots, but we had to improvise. Eli did not like the bib snow pants. But when it came down to it they were both willing to pay the price to be out in the white delight.

"He's my marshmallow boy in the winter.

When the snow comes to cover the ground.

It's the time for play, it's a whipped cream day,

I wait for it all year round."

A rare opportunity for me to be in a picture. Maybe in 2013 I'll be in more pictures...

The kids waited all winter last year to build a snowman and it just never worked out. The first snow was just a skiff, and not quite sufficient for a snowman. But the second storm brought enough to construct this guy. Richard was really sick after Christmas and was in the house with Miriam and Simon, but wasn't really functioning as a care-taker, so I went back and forth from the yard to the house to meet the demands of the four kids, because apparently Cameron and Eli are not capable of making a snowman on their own.

Time to Update!

2013-01-16T09:15:00.002-07:00

Why is blogging dying? I'm reminded of an episode of Colbert where he is promoting his book, he says

"For my younger audience, a book is like a blog for people with an attention span."

I would take that one step further and say

"For my younger readers, a blog is like Instagram for people with an attention span."

Have I made that joke before?

Oh well, I'm ready to get back into it.

I've definitely said that before.