MY MUMBAI

A traditional tea party

2012-01-21T09:25:00.000+05:30

Last Sunday was Makar Sankrant which every Indian will tell you marks the beginning of the sun's journey to the Northern hemisphere. This is celebrated with kites and the blue skies are suddenly populated with hundreds and thousands of brightly hued kites. Since last year, however, I find that there are no kites flying outside my house apart from the avian variety and I don't know whether to attribute this to the Marathon ( which was held last Sunday), a total conversion of our population into couch potatoes or a general awareness that kite flying is both dangerous to the young children who pursue a kite fight unmindful of the sharp glass coated string tied to the kites, running on to the streets regardless of traffic , and to the bird population which literally gets beheaded in the kite fights.

But luckily this festival has not totally become extinct and at least the food part is still followed. There is an exchange of sesame sweets which signify a cessation of hostilities with the entreaty that " please let bygones be bygones and let our interaction be as sweet as this exchange". One of the traditions of my community is to mark this festival with a tea party exclusively for women where the goody bag consists of seasonal berries, peanuts, a piece of sugar cane and some fresh green gram. This is given with turmeric and vermillion powder and a garland of flowers to put in one's hair. A cousin revived this tradition this year with a view to introducing her young grand daughter to this custom. As the ladies in traditional saris munched down the tasty eats and sipped tea and coffee, I wondered why tea time has been relegated to a quick cup gulped down in minutes? There is something to be said for this elegant form of entertaining where people had all the time in the world to share some gossip over a cup of tea.

Good Morning Friday

2012-01-20T07:49:00.003+05:30

This week has seen funny weather : cold nights, chilly mornings, warm days and the occasional cloudy skies. Very unusual for this time of year. While my Dutch guests were enjoying this "warm summer weather" which they were fortunate to experience in the middle of their Winter, I was actually feeling cold. They actually laughed when I shut the door to keep out a draft which is why today I'm sniffling with a runny nose............

My favourite towers being bathed in golden sunlight

Blue grey and silver

Anyway, do enjoy these gorgeous skies, grey with a hint of blue and gold with the sunlight slowly breaking in. A sure reminder that behind every cloud there truly is a silver lining.

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Mumbai's Marathon - Cheering them on

2012-01-15T14:19:00.000+05:30

Runners from Mumbai's first Marathon will be unable to recognise the race today. The first year was actually amateurish in comparison to today as I find that each year the race gets bigger and better. Apart from the one year where I was annoyed by the house arrest imposed by the Marathon, I love playing my part in this race as an enthusiastic cheerleader. This year's cheerleaders at Kemp's Corner surpassed all their previous performances. For one, there were balloons in shades of blue lined up along the wall. The residents of closeby buildings were ready with whistles and cameras ready to click pictures of their near and dear ones, friends, aquaintances and even the occasional celebrity running down this stretch .

Actually, this year, I had no intention to really see the marathon and had deliberately driven down to Pune on Friday evening to avoid being in Mumbai. However, the really chilly weather in Pune ( almost 6 degrees Celcius) made it impossible for us to chat without our teeth chattering and when three blankets were not enough to ensure a warm cozy sleep we decided to head back home. So we drove back yesterday which left me with no option but to go down to see the Marathon today especially since the noise downstairs was both deafening and intriguing.

Though most of the organisers were around since 6 am, by the time I made it an hour and a half later, the crowd was just getting into the swing of things. With a Dj providing heart pumping music, hot coffee and tea on the tap, samosas and jalebis to provide energy, the young girls from Sophia College provided the necessary enthusiasm to dance and cheer the runners on their last leg of the race.

A marathon is a marathon task, even the run for fun part so all the more those brave hearts who do the half and full marathon definitely need all the support they can get. As I spotted some known faces stoically running down the road, I felt guilty that apart from cheering from the side lines, there was nothing remotely athletic or spirited about my participation in the race. But then not every one can run and if every one is driving a Mercedes, who will watch them go by?

I'd rather watch on the sidelines and cheer lustily, my parched throat quenched by hot coffee and my tired knees resting on a comfortable chair.

However, full marks to all those who ran : after all if there are no runners there will be no marathon. That said, I wonder what next year's cheerleading will bring? Trapeze artistes? Who knows.

Yes we have no bananas - Only chips

2012-01-10T16:33:00.001+05:30

So Anna Shetty has returned back to life and has relocated to Cochin.

The days after the wedding were spent in trying to get things back in order : tidying up, paying bills and filling in the vacuum now looming large with no wedding activity to orchestrate.

The only job left to be done is to organise the wedding album a task getting more and more tedious by the innumerable photos in large Megabytes that make uploading the picture one painful task after another. While I am busy tackling this issue, I google the net looking desperately for shops that sell fruit and vegetables in Cochin. Strange as it may seem, Anna Shetty is finding it difficult to buy the basic necessities of life. Living in one of the better residential areas of town famous for its lifestyle stores, jewelry stores and hospitals, it seems finding a banana is like looking for a needle in a hay stack. Needless to say, banana chips are easy to come by as they are what the tourists want...

So poor Anna Shetty has to eat chips and look out for fresh fruit and vegetables.

Wedding Bells

2011-12-26T07:11:00.000+05:30

2011 was the year when all I thought was wedding, wedding and wedding. It was a year filled with activity - brainstorming, planning and finally executing. I found florists and decorators, caterers and make-up artistes, sampled mithais and pedhas and tramped the labyrinthine streets of Mumbai looking for decorations, card printers, band wallahs and mehndi artistes. Well, it's over now and what a joyous celebration it was!

From the first week of December the house began filling up with daughters returning home for the wedding, family and friends coming into the city from far and wide to participate and share in our celebrations. With marigolds and henna, kumkum and jewelry, food and revelry, the air was filled with riotous colour, bonhomie and a palpable energy.

We had a blast those four fun filled days and now with the couple away on a honeymoon, I shall reflect on these happy times in moments of quiet solitude as I spend the rest of the year tidying up and putting things back in order .

Happy New Year to you All. May 2012 bring you peace and joy.

Bring on the Band Baja -

2011-12-06T06:54:00.001+05:30

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Last week I had to hunt around for musicians to play at Anna Shetty's wedding. Most Indian weddings have a live band escorting the groom's party to the wedding venue and several early mornings have been disturbed by loud film music played very enthusiastically by outfits derogatorily referred to as the "Nankhatai Band". Dressed in gaudy red coats trimmed with gold, wearing ill fitting hats and almost always quite drunk,these poor musicians have to be on duty at early hours of the morning after having been let off pretty late the night before.

But even if bands are not de-rigor at a wedding ,we felt that it may be a good touch to have some live performers playing the shehnai. So it was that I went looking for a suitable band. At a wedding last year I had picked up a card of the band of musicians playing the Shehnai and called them for a quote. I was shocked when I was told that they charged Rs 17,000 for one performance! Although the band was travelling from Pune, this figure was really too much . So I began hunting for local talent in earnest and was thrilled when Sonu the priest at the Shankarshett temple told me about another shehnaiwallah in Mulund who charged all of Rs.5000. With this more realistic figure, live music at the wedding function seemed more affordable and I realised that there would be some performers closer to home.

After scouting around, I came upon a whole host of them clustered in the area at Girgaon's Tatya Gharpure Road off the main VP Road near the Amboli Church crossing . They enthusiastically brought out photo albums of their past performances while I eyed their cupboards filled with stacks of different outfits. Thoroughly impressed by their professionalism I took their visiting cards to make the final deals from home after discussing with the rest of the family.

In conversation :

"Hello, is that XXXX Bandwallah?"
"Yes, it is"
"What do you charge for playing the shehnai at a wedding?"
"Well we charge per hour Rs. XXX for a two hour slot"
"Does this include the cost of transportation?"
"Yes it does"
"Any other hidden costs like tips?"
"No, but we charge more if you want us to play with clothes on."
"What!!! you mean to say you play without any clothes?"
"No of course we play with clothes but not special clothes unless you pay extra"
"Oh I see"

I still have to get over the fright I got when I imagined the shenhaiwallas playing stark naked at Anna Shetty's wedding!

Mumbai in December

2011-12-01T15:16:00.001+05:30

Several years ago when I was visiting Poland in June, the chambermaid cleaning our room was amazed to see me wearing a wind cheater while she wore a sleeveless top and shorts. She looked aghast and asked where I came from as this was a really warm day in Warsaw. I told her that where I came from it was the coldest day I'd experienced and she couldn't believe it.

These days with global warming it is even more true. Gone are the days when a Mumbai December meant mild sunshine and nippy mornings. Alas, we've been having hot humid days reminiscent of summer and last week's brilliant skies were clear and bright like our pre-monsoon skies. So I've captured these skies to share with all of you this week . I hope they bring you as much joy as they did me.

A city waking up

In keeping with our new tradition of seeing a movie a week, Anna Shetty and I decided to see "The Help" currently playing in our Mumbai multi plexes. Surprisingly for an English movie morning show this show had a sizeable audience of 30 people and what was more suprising was that the audience was predominantly female. Of course considering the subject a topic dear to our hearts : domestics and the problems of getting them, this movie was a scary reminder of how close we are to losing this oft taken for granted luxury.

Marine Drive under a blue sky

One of the major topics of discussion in Indian households is criticism of the house help. Both of us were engrossed by the movie. We loved the story line and even though the story line was predictable, the performances were engaging . I can see this movie getting an Oscar nomination.

Good morning Mumbai!

Definitely a movie not worth missing.

Reflections in granite

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Wedding Two - Ghosts from the Past

2011-11-25T07:15:00.001+05:30

I still can't get over last evening's pre-wedding party at Tote on the Turf an ordinarly beautiful venue set amidst the greenery of the Turf Club which became even more magical with lights, tents and ladies swishing by in slinky saris and glittering jewels.

Nostalgia seemed to be the mood for the day as Anna Shetty was entertaining her old piano teacher. After years of being silent, the piano suddenly came to life at home and I realised how much I missed those tinny sounds in the silence of the past ten years. A wave of nostalgia further came over me when I met the parents of the bride who were an integral part of our lives all those years ago when as young women we bumbled over recipes, motherhood and the challenges of settling down and establishing families. Somewhere along the years we forgot those brunches after vintage car rallies, games of squash , sailing in Mumbai's harbour and hours spent in the club watching over our little children play while we caught up with gossip in the middle of our humdrum lives. Friendships shift and people drift apart but at times like weddings you still reach out to friends from the past.

The contingent of young friends and relatives danced on the stage and narrated the romantic story of the bridal couple hindi movie style - with a power point presentation interspersed with choreographed Bollywood numbers. The young girls in tasteful bling looked distinctly awkward "Chhamak Challoing" but were caught up in the spirit of things and got the party really moving with their youthful enthusiasm.

Looking through the crowd of familiar faces now squinting at one another in the hope of remembering the right name, I met up with two friends. We spent the next few hours catching up in this relaxed and pleasant atmosphere as we guzzled down the wine and nibbled at the sumptuous buffet of prawn cocktail, terriyaki chicken salad, poached pear salad, three cheese rissotto, spinach lasagne, mirch ka salan,paneer, daal makkhani, red and green thai curry to go with Pad Thai, grilled fish, roast chicken and a fantastic mutton dum biryani. With assorted breads both Indian and Western, this spread was simply perfect. Finishing off this meal was fully laden dessert counter with fresh strawberry icecream, walnut flavoured mousse, chocolate cake, ras malai and tiny fig pies .

This was the perfect end to a day that began with gloomy skies outside my bedroom window.

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The South Bombay Watchman

2011-11-23T19:16:00.001+05:30

What is it about the South Bombay watchman that makes him so obnoxious?

Like taxi drivers , watchmen are a breed apart . Put any puny man in a uniform, give him a peak cap and a whistle and within seconds watch him transform into a pugnacious bully.

Several years ago I had to deal with a watchman who really gave me the run around while parking in a building compound. This was in the days when you could happily park anywhere as most people had just a car or two. Yet this watchman made me park somewhere in the distance and when I finished my business guided me out. To my horror, he actually put a dead kitten in front of my windscreen and told me that since the dead kitten had fallen out of my car, I should take it back????? I couldn't believe it and actually began screaming at him in sheer frustration

Since then, I've developed an allergy to these twerps dressed in copy cat military uniform who make you bring your car back just that one inch or make you re-park your car so that it is just a foot away from the next.

So when we had to distribute cards for the forthcoming wedding, I thought it would be best if we walked since the cars have doubled, the parking space has diminished and the traffic has become well nigh impossible. But entering a building on foot has made interacting with watchmen even more miserable. Hardly used to seeing anyone apart from tradesmen, postmen and courier delivery men walking into these posh residential complexes, a person like me who is none of the above nor a posh lady ( since posh ladies don't walk) brought on even more rude and obnoxious behavious.

The minute I entered a building I was asked in a rough bark who I wanted to visit, what my business was and from where I came. There was no question of please or may I and by the fourth visit I was ready to tell them I was the Wicked Witch from the West who would turn them all into the goblins that they really were!

I decided that I'd rather send the invites off by post or better still by email. That way I wouldn't have to worry about dealing with the South Bombay watchman .

There's something about marigolds

2011-11-21T06:50:00.001+05:30

There's something about the robust marigold that captures the essence of festivity and exudes a sense of warmth and celebration. This was very apparent in the wedding I attended last night , the wedding of a dear friend of Anna Shetty's. The groom looked handsome in his cream sherwani off set by a 3 string necklace of large emeralds tastefully matching the white plumed diamond and emerald sarpech (turban ornament) that perched on shaded blue silk turban on his head.
Contrary to what you may think, this was not at all garish or over the top as the bride managed to steal the show in her brilliantly embroidered deep red lehenga, bedecked in diamonds that glittered when they caught the light. The bridal couple were surrounded by family and friends many of whom I remember in their school uniforms milling around the compound while waiting for their mothers to take them home. Here they were today, all grown up and well groomed, some married and others waiting ,dressed to play parts in their role of a lifetime.

Marvelling at this march of time, I couldn't help but watch in awe at this beautiful space bathed in a glow of bright orange; tastefully done up with a fine attention to detail : welcoming the guests to the "marriage area" with a magnificent archway of marigold garlands, and escorting them through the passages lined with marigolds and oil lamps. The marigold garland theme was repeated in the reception area which was simply stunning. We were welcomed to that quintessential Marwadi custom of High Tea which is served between the ceremony and the reception followed by a more lavish banquet , by the gracious hosts who mingled easily with their guests. Men in black suits and women clad in saris with bling and more bling , their jewels sparkling in the muted light, mingled conversation with sushi, appams and polenta with practiced ease. Despite being vegetarian, the food was lip smackingly scrumptious and it was hard to resist going for seconds. The snacky Indian fare of pani puri, dabeli and aloo chaat were equally appreciated and with free flowing mocktails, tea & coffee for those who really wanted tea, and an array of desserts both Indian and Western there could hardly be a guest who went hungry for lack of choice!

The wedding mandap itself was again tastefully decorated with marigolds, and the entire area was lit with oil lamps that flickered through the ceremony. Guests sitting on gold tissue cushions watched the bridal couple go around the holy fire, promise each other a life time of fidelity and allegiance . You could feel the love in the air as yet another season of weddings has begun.

p.s. The photo in this blog entry is not mine nor is it from the wedding reception I attended last night. I also didn't stay for the dinner reception which I'm sure was more my loss.

Fine Dining at The Table

2011-11-20T07:00:00.001+05:30

Image via Wikipedia

Colaba attracts tourist like bees to a honey pot which is why it always is a great spot for dining. In this small area there are at least fifty eating spots offering cuisine to suit the Indian and international palate alike and to match your pocket and appetite to spend.

I love trying out new restaurants but unfortunately in the last few years my waist line has been unable to accomodate their increasing numbers so it is often a long time before I discover a restaurant that has long since been discovered by others before me.

One such restaurant is "The Table", a fine dining restaurant surrounded by other equally fine dining restaurants in Colaba. Opposite the Cottage Industries and alongside IndigoDeli and Moshe, The Table opened its doors to Mumbai around six months ago.But in those six months it has established itself as one of the restaurants that one must go to while dining in Mumbai a fact I found out when asking for a dinner reservation several times and was told that there was a two month wait list!

So when Su invited me to The Table ( Apollo Bunder , Colaba) to celebrate the end of the Four Month fast, I readily agreed to squeeze a quick lunch in the midst of my hectic wedding preparations.

Keeping close to the original architecture of the building, The Table's black painted stone arches and walls lend it an air of quiet sophistication. A lively bar with a long table welcomes you at the entrance and cosy tables separated from the pavement by clear glass windows gives the feel of an open air bistro but not being an afficionado of al fresco dining I preferred eating in the overhanging mezzanine dining space. We were shown to a well appointed table and presented with the lunch menu. Since Su had eaten there before she knew exactly what to order so after a cursory look at the wine list we ordered a half glass each of white wine - I had the tried and tested Sauvignon Blanc while she had a Chardonnay. Incidentally my wine came from Vallone a relatively unheard of winery which surprisingly produced the best Sauvignon Blanc I have ever had so far and perfectly complemented to the Spicy grilled calamari which was tasty and succulent. I tried so hard to analyse what went into making it but could only identify the peanuts and much as I mopped up the sauce with the delightful assorted breads from the basket, I still could not figure out how it was made.

Su had a grilled tiger prawn encrusted with bread and a sprinkling of cheese which was equally delightful. We shared the dishes and had no room for dessert but had a macchiato to round off the meal. This was a bit disappointing as the foam on the top was not as impressively twirled as the cafe macchiato at the Willingdon Club, I'd been introduced to last week by a young man about town fresh home from the Land of the Free.

Verdict : A great dining spot. Expensive but worth it because the dishes are truly wonderful. A
Words of caution: a) Check out the wine served to you - my half glass of wine was the same as Su's full glass of wine so we sent it back and asked for two halves instead! b) Be prepared to really dig deep into your pockets because most of the wines and alcohol is imported.

Will I go again : For sure especially when I am in the mood to splurge. (This meal was Rs1800 for two)

Rockstar - You have to be insane or drugged to see it

2011-11-14T14:31:00.001+05:30

After a perfect Sunday we had to have a reality check - which is what we got this morning after seeing "Rockstar". Honestly it is one of the most inane movies I have seen so far. Ranbir Singh was angry for no reason and his demeanor throughout the movie was so vicious that he looked more like a barbarian than the Rockstar he was supposed to be.

Ranbir Kapoor who is the "Rockstar" looks so believably scruffy and filthy that I could actually smell his raw animal presence. His love interest in the movie is one silly girl Heer who is a spoilt rich girl. With her emotions which range from supercilious to tortured and with a supporting cast that is so stereotypical it is no wonder that Janardhan Jakkhad aka JJ and reinvented as Jordan ( Ranbir Kapoor) is so angry all the time.

As for the story - it is pure trash. It operates on two premises :

1) You have to be seriously "damaged" "tortured" or "anguished" to be a musician/painter or artiste.

2) All love stories necessarily have to be tragic with convoluted plots to make a movie

Thus you have Heer ( Nargis Fakhri) who is neat & clean but has a secret desire to live life dangerously . Thus after uncovering JJ's ruse to find pain in order to become a serious artiste ( according to his canteenwala cum mentor) the two of them actually spend a few days living the low life - visiting seedy bars, drinking country liquor and watching Hindi Porn films

Having satisfied her desire to be the "bad girl" Heer goes ahead with her arranged marriage which this time round was not the big fat Punjabi or Marwadi wedding but glimpses of a Kashmiri Pandit wedding . Their paths actually cross once again in Parag ( Prague) where Jordan is performing . After three days of intense romancing and sneaking around, Heer develops cancer, so she flies back to India to die. At a rock concert, Heer's little sister comes up to Jordan and tells him that his lady love is dying. So he goes to her house and wants to kiss her - an action that drives her to such a rage that she gets up and starts walking. Within two weeks of being in each others company, her blood count improves and she is well enough to accompany him to a rock show in Manali. Luckily she goes back home and discovers that she is pregnant??? Thankfully she dies at the end of the movie but not before Jordan watches his guitar burn while he sits in a tub having a shower fully clothed.

The Story writer and Director of the movie obviously were under the influence of some terrible substance which addled their brains so much that they actually believed they were making a grand tragic romantic movie. Honestly they should pass around some of that same substance to unsuspecting audiences to numb their brains. Otherwise, there will be plenty of angry young men tearing up the cinema screens, trashing theatres in sheer anger and frustration .

Verdict : Don't see this movie even if you are paid to do so.

11-11-11

2011-11-11T06:54:00.001+05:30

This week was very busy so I am pulling up a picture from last year where the orange pink sunrise is any day more cheery than the haze outside my balconey.

1-1-11,
11-1-11
1-11-11
11-11-11

These four "mystical " dates have driven several people to a frenzy with the significance of these numbers. At the beginning of the year there was an SMS and email doing the rounds saying that if you added the last two digits of the year of your birth to the age you will be this year ( 2011), the sum will equal 111.

Several magical things were supposed to happen on these dates - obviously nothing magical happened to me but today, the last number in the series may herald the birth of Aishwarya Rai Bacchan's first born if the newspapers are to be believed.

Apparently like all magical numbers, this date too has several babies lined up for Caeserian section births to avail of the benefits of being born on such lucky dates. But unlike the millions of unknown mothers, this time we have a celebrity mother already in Seven Hills Hospital waiting for her first born.

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Welcome Back Lord Vishnu

2011-11-07T07:21:00.002+05:30

Image via WikipediaToday Lord Vishnu comes back from his four month holiday. I for one am glad to have him back because I can go back to my reckless eating ways. It has been rather tough to give up sweets, alcohol, non vegetarian food and dinner for four whole months - especially when most of the the four months were the festive months and I actually had to make the food without so much as tasting it.

But of course with every self -denial I felt my "halo" glow and actually preened with smug self righteousness when I watched people eat. In a way these four months were liberating as I didn't have to eat late or give excuses for not eating at dinner parties. This meant that I had four months of peaceful slumber without any GERD or other gastric disturbances ruining my sleep.

Apart from the food restrictions, I also tried to think good thoughts ( a task at which I failed miserably I must confess with a shocking negative score) and learn some prayers and chants. The one prayer I discovered during this time is the full version of Achyutam Keshavam , two stanzas of which that are normally included in our Ganeshpooja celebrations. You can go to this link to hear the melodious version by the famous singer Yesudas.

So today, which marks the end of four months of austerity, Vishnu gets married to the Tulsi plant or Holy Basil which means open season for Hindu weddings and the beginning of yet another round of feasting and merry making.

Roll out the red carpets, the wedding processions and the festivities.................

Bring out your silks, your pearls and your diamonds...........

Happy Wedding Season to everyone!

Here comes the Bride: shopping at Nalli's

2011-11-06T07:51:00.000+05:30

The silk Garwhal for the bride

One of the best wedding customs we have is that of inviting the bride to a special lunch or dinner prior to the wedding where she is the guest of honour. Not only is this a leisurely way of catching up with long lost friends and relatives but it is also a way of interacting with the bride one on one before her big day. Very often the groom is also invited with his family so that everyone gets to know one another. However, it is quite difficult to orchestrate everyone's presence at a given time or date in Mumbai when half a family is always too busy to attend so this function has been adapted to suit our times where people have a combined bridal shower with one branch of the family having a pot-luck or contributory meal .

Yesterday Anna Shetty was given a new kind of bridal shower by Mrs. B and her charming daughter in law met us at the Mumbai branch of Chennai's iconic store Nalli's at Mahalakshmi. While this store doesn't have half the charm of the original but we still managed to spend three hours looking at every sari in the store while catching up on what the bride and her groom do, their future plans and snippets of their romance.

The gossamer fine Chanderi

At four thirty in the afternoon it seemed every amma and her daughter were at Nalli's and we were literally looking over one another's shoulder trying to see which sari was being unfurled in front of you. While it is hard to make oneself heard over the din, the advantage of shoulder to shoulder shopping is that you can see at least ten saris at one time. Since each customer has a different taste, it is easier to point out what you like and then ask your attendant salesman to show you what you want.

With literally hundreds of saris like Kanjeevarams, modern saris, Coimbatore silks, Upadas, Bandinis,Myore Georgettes, Patolas, Oriya, I realised that if you do want to go sari shopping in Mumbai, it is best to visit the website of the shop prior to the actual visit to have a more meaningful shopping experience because apart from the traditional saris you can choose from a variety of modern adaptations of traditional weaves . Gone are the days when you asked for a wedding or a casual sari, the operative words these days in sari shops are "concept", "collection" ,"designer"and" bridal .

After two and a half hours of combing through every sari in the store, we finally found what we wanted. Thank you ladies for a lovely afternoon and a unique and delightful bridal shower!

This seemed to be the perfect end to a hectic week of wedding preparations interspered with corporate entertainment. With overseas visitors in town, every evening was spent in fine dining and wining. While most of our meals were outside, we had our customary meal at home where Anna Shetty dazzled with this gorgeous centrepiece : it was just the right touch to a meal of steak & potato salad, Spaghetti a l'oleo, Sea Bass in lemon butter sauce, grilled tiger prawn, garden fresh Mediterranean vegetables, rummy chocolate mousse all washed down with a mellow 2008 Chateau d'Ori Cabernet Syrah.

Pine cones & candles

Friends & Family - To choose or not to choose

2011-11-05T06:33:00.003+05:30

My father always used to say that one can never choose one's family but one can choose one's friends: so one should choose well and wisely.

Friends come into our lives in the strangest of ways :

Sometimes we find them at a bus stop,

Sometimes at a bar,

We find them in school,

Or at work,

The Gym.

The doctor's waiting room,

Sometimes through other friends.

Friends are people whom we like

Whom we feel comfortable with

Share happy times and sad

Who laugh with us and cry with us

People for whom we'd gladly die.

But how do we come upon our families?

How do they come into our lives?

Do we choose them at a cosmic plane?

Or do we get them by a karmic lottery?

Would we choose the same mother?
The same father?
Would we choose the same child?

Sometimes I really wonder.

Mother-of -the-Bride : You can't expect things to be perfect can you?

2011-10-31T17:53:00.000+05:30

For the past 40 weeks I have taken on another role - the mother of the bride.

Anyone who's been there and done that will tell you that this is another rite of passage that initiates you into yet another club - THE IN-LAWS.

And like every other club member each one will have her own tale that made her special day special. I have heard so may stories these past 40 weeks that I actually thought of making another blog but that would have taken far too much time especially now when I have many more things to do before the big day.

However, yesterday I heard a priceless one which I just have to re-tell :

Like most brides of our times, Jo went in for an "arranged marriage". Most people are under the impression that an"arranged marriage" is one decided completely by the parents and the bride and groom cast eyes on each other the very first time when the curtain between them is taken down. This is far from the truth. Of course we are 'introduced " to the prospective spouse either subtly ( at a party or a wedding or through friends or friends of friends) or not too subtly when the whole family descends on the bride's house to check out the scene.

After the first look, the candidates are allowed to meet each other in private, away from prying eyes and nosy relatives and after four visits to a month ( depending on how broad minded the bride's family is) the couple decide whether or not they can live the rest of their lives with each other. Once this major decision is taken, the bride and the groom just have to show up at the wedding.

Our wedding sarees are also traditionally decided so choosing a wedding saree is a no-brainer. So when Jo was given the option of choosing a saree, she chose to wear a gorgeous silk brocade identical to the one specially commissioned by one of her aunts. Flattered that the young girl chose to have a saree identical to hers, the aunt in question promptly placed the order with the master weaver in the temple city of Kancheepuram way down south. Unfortunately, despite the six month advance notice, the wedding saree did not arrive on time so Jo was told to get married in her aunt's saree instead.

If this were not bad enough, the day before the wedding, as she sat down for the ceremony she heard a distinct rip as the delicate fabric gave way.

So despite the best intentions of having everything planned down to the T, you can't always expect things to be perfect can you?

My sky this week

2011-10-28T06:11:00.001+05:30

Today is the last day of the Festival of Lights celebrated all over India as Diwali and the night sky was lit up with fireworks. The markets this year were flooded with coloured lights and lanterns and most people took advantage of that and decorated their homes with them.

My favourite buildings all lit up

Buildings bathed in coloured light

some more night sky

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Actually these next set of pictures deserve their own showcase but I just had to share my moments of bliss on Marine Drive last week. This gorgeous stretch of road hugging the Arabian Sea is flanked by Art Deco buildings on one side and is one of the most relaxing walks in the world. Especially in the evenings as the sun sets down, despite the numerous people walking, running, loitering, hanging around it is always a pleasant place to be in.

Sunset at Marine Drive

getting ready to leave for home

The lights slowly come up on Marine Drive

The Mother of All Loves - Cow & Calf Day

2011-10-23T07:58:00.000+05:30

Today is Vasu Baras or the day of the Cow & Calf - a day whose significance is lost in the march of the modern world. In the good old days when ours was an agrarian economy, this 12th day of the month is supposed to be a day when we remember and honour a cow and its young calf in recognition of Motherhood, the Mother of all Loves with the cow and her young one representing this highest form of love.

Motherhood and extolling the virtues of motherhood is a recurrent theme in our culture and our daily lives. The Fridays in the month of Shravan are dedicated to children . Young girls are specially blessed with a "May you have a 100 sons" and of course the female power is embodied in the concept of a Mother Goddess.

Kojagiri Poornima, the time of year when the moon is closest to the earth , which fell on the 11th of October this year is another such day when a mother is supposed to honour her first born child with a gift which is white coloured ( once again white symbolising the romantic love at its best and purest - with the moon's proximity to the earth ). On this bright night too, the goddess of wealth is supposed to go from house to house asking "Who is awake?" and filling the homes of those who are, with peace and prosperity.

While I have never celebrated Kojagiri Poornima with gifts, my mother has religiously given me one but I have of course kept the door of my house wide open to welcome the goddess to my home on on her nocturnal jaunt.

My friends and I who are all in a state of semi-mothering that limbo land between active mothering and grand-mothering are rediscovering the joys of being foot loose and fancy free. With no crying babies to tend to, no homework schedules to follow, no extra curricular activities on our calendar, with chocolate free fridges and lots of time to do really nothing we often ask ourselves if motherhood is a much made of emotion. Do mothers really love their children at all? And can this love be truly unconditional? And can this love be equal?

Having said that, all of us are secretly pleased as punch with our own children, gaze longingly at their baby photos and are bursting with pride as we see them step forth into the world as confident young adults. Truly motherhood is the expression of love like no other , a fulfillment of emotions unmatched and like everything else in life comes with its set of opposites : joy and sorrow, pride and embarrassment.

To all the mothers out there in the world Happy Cow & Calf Day. May this first day of the festival of lights be the start of a joyous festival season full of laughter and harmony in the company of your dear and loved ones.

To Pune, to Pune, to buy some sarees

2011-10-14T22:16:00.000+05:30

Welcome back!

Mahabaleshwar holds memories of spending summer holidays in the back of beyond Government guest house , the huge stone structure with a hundred steep steps, high ceilings, spooky bathrooms and huge verandahs surrounded by mist. The days were spent walking through thick woods from point to point, making the obligatory trip to the market to buy the daily provisions and of course seeing the monkey show, the magic show , the visit to the strawberry fields, being stranded in the middle of the lake and of course to the temple in Old Mahabaleshwar. So I was quite surprised when I found that several fashionable women of Mumbai and Pune religiously made their way to Pallod a saree shop.

I was in Pune earlier this week where I had gone to buy sarees. Honestly now many people from Mumbai or Delhi or Bangalore or even Chennai will say I'm nuts but honestly, I feel that the best sarees are available in Pune. Perhaps my parents staying there has something to do with it but I truly feel that Pune truly has a wide range of sarees available to suit every customer.

While Mumbai's sarees are a mixture of the high end couture ones and the absolute low end whole sale ones, Chennai and Bangalore specialise in silk especially the traditional handwoven silks. Delhi concentrates on the Benarasis, chiffons,, block prints and handlooms with the obligatory haute couture bridals.

Which brings me to my original premise that Pune is really the best place to buy sarees. A trip to any shop in Laxmi Road especially Pratibha or Peshwai ( off Kumthekar Chowk) will set you back by a few thousand rupees as it is hardly likely that you will come away without making any purchase. Traditional weaves in cotton and silk mix like Maheshwari and Chanderi in brilliant colours and modern designs, traditional cottons and silks from Andhra Pradesh and Coimbatore, hand woven silks from the south are the perfect gifts for weddings.

But the place where I really struck gold was at Pallod an off shoot of Pallod of Mahabaleshwar. Situated on Bhandarkar Road. this spacious shop has sarees to suit every taste and every budget. At first it is a bit difficult to get exactly what you want but once your salesman has gauged your preferences, he leaves no stone unturned to find what you want.

So if you have any wedding shopping to do - you had best make your way to Pallod.

Early morning on Worli Seaface

2011-10-14T06:53:00.001+05:30

Welcome back!

Worli Seaface is one of those beautiful promenades that make Mumbai different from other cities. Almost at regular intervals, there is this long stretch of road hugging the sea that becomes a favourite spot for people to walk especially early in the morning when dawn is breaking or at sunset when the sun slowly dips into the sea.

Laxman's Common Man stoically watching a man doing yoga by the sea.

While Marine Drive retains its pristine glory with its art deco buildings, our Municipality in all its wisdom has upped the beauty of Worli Seaface by putting some interesting touches like this bronze statue of Laxman's Common Man who stoically watches the denizens of Mumbai march past.

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How many people has this man seen
exercising,
staring out into the sea,
couples holding hands, cuddling up to each other
selling peanuts and balloons
grandparents chasing toddlers
ladies saying prayers
stockbrokers discussing stocks?
Do they leave an impression in
His frozen mind or does
he just remember the sea breaking into the wall,
the spray going up in thousand droplets
and millions of sunsets just vanishing into the horizon?

Oh! we don't do White Cards

2011-10-09T07:44:00.000+05:30

Welcome back!

For the past several weeks I've been making the trek to Khadilkar Road, a small busy street off Girgaon Main Road. This is the heart of the Wedding Card industry in Mumbai and caters to all kinds of clients both in India and overseas. My first trip was somewhere in September before the start of the Period of Remembering the Dead ( Pitrupaksh) and the road was still full of avoidable puddles. I still managed to go the entire length of the road and found that the shops at the end of the road towards CP Tank had such high end manufacturers that they only opened doors on prior appointment. Naturally I avoided such establishments because I definitely didn't have that kind of budget in mind ( starting at Rs.500 a card). I have been the recipient of cards from such places and they are definitely worth it - you will get a unique individually crafted card which no one else will ever replicate . But I must warn you that designing a card is not easy.

While most of us have an idea of what we want, getting it across to the vendor is another thing.

In this narrow one way street that starts at CP Tank circle and ends up at Girgaon's Main Road opposite Gaiwadi all the card makers look quite similar and most of them stock standard paper with a standardised ready made card ready to go in keeping with the fashion and trends of the time. Don't be surprised at the indifference your entrance into the shop invites. The shop keeper too is assessing you and after a few questions, will be able to gauge whether he is your "type" or not.Like most vendors, these guys are pretty savvy and can make out a potential customer and his choice. Some will straight away tell you that they are unable to cater to your taste while others will act so vague that you leave out of exasperation. Yet there are others who are really slick and sophisticated but then they are the card makers who really charge the earth

So if you manage to ignore the indifferent attitude and ask for samples, you will find that they don't really have a catalogue. Samples are kept in large bulky boxes with absolutely no categorisation or stuck in cumbersome photo albums .What they should really have is an interactive program so that clients can design their own cards or if this is too hi-tech at least have an online card catalogue which can be seen on a big screen in their tiny shop.

So while going down the street be prepared for responses like " Oh we don't do white cards" or "We have only horizontal cards" or " Those are Christian cards" or "Indians don't need RSVP cards" or "We only do NRI cards" and the like.

Also, most of the online catalogues are pretty out dated as one vendor informed me that all the cards that are online are yesterday's cup of tea. ( May be this was his line to fob me off)

But for those of you who are on the look out for cards, these guys have it all . They catch on pretty quick especially after you visit their shop the second time round when they actually figure that you've finished with the recce and have now got down to business.

Some shops for ready reference are :
NIARIKA ART PRINTERS
MASTER CARD PRODUCTS
PORWAL CARD PRODUCTS which has internet presence but can be contacted at 23821526 and is at 59, Khadilkar Road, Shop no 5 Madhav Bhuvan.
SAGAR CARDS which also is at 52 Khadilkar Road
VIVAAH whose web site is not that interactive but whose owner Satyen Patwa is a gem.
BLOSSOM CARDS
CARD CORNER whose website has expired but can be contacted on 23824524 and is at 216/218 Khadilkar Road in the vicinity of Niarila and Vivaah which is closer to the Girgaon Main Road side of the street.
PRINCE CARD CENTRE which I just visited to have a sample population.

These shops are just some of the many that you can find on this road. The shops closer to the CP Tank as mentioned earlier are more exclusive and need an appointment. But whatever your requirement for any occasion, these shop keepers will dazzle with their repertoire. They may not have great marketing tools and their shops may look untidy and messy reeking with the smell of adhesive, the vendors may have one eye on you and the other looking over your shoulder and their attention divided over the mobile and the land line - but once you've established your intent of actually placing your order with them, they will go all out to show you exactly what you want and deliver complete with plastic cover and contact details of the address label maker!

p.s. it is advisable to go on foot even though cars can enter from the CP Tank side.
p.p.s Vendors never give samples so it is advisable to go with samples as reference .
p.p.p.s Shops open at 10.30 - 11.00 and are closed on Sundays. Saturdays are not a good day to visit as the shops are really crowded.

Lastly, make sure you have enough time to proof read because I've seen a card that was proof read and still had Saturday misspelled!

Goodbye my monsoon sunsets

2011-10-07T06:51:00.000+05:30

Welcome back!

Just before the monsoons and soon after the last heavy showers, my Mumbai sky is sharp and clear and I often get to see the best sunsets at this time of the year. After months of heavy grey clouds masking the sun, it is wonderful to welcome the sun yet again. While the October heat can be opressive, the sunsets are glorious especially with a few wisps of cloud to make a dramatic backdrop as the city slowly lights up in the fading sunlight.

My glorious pink and lilac sunset

So this whole week, I tried to capture the last of these monsoon sunsets and found I tried to capture them and found to my dismay that some of the shots were blurred. However, that did not stop me from experimenting and I got a great picture - almost like a comic book illustration.

With a little tweaking a bad photo becomes a great picture

The city slowly lighting up as the sky darkens into night

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Happy Dussera

2011-10-06T11:29:00.001+05:30

Welcome back!

Dussera is one of those festivals which marks the end of a nine day celebration in honour of the Mother Godess called "Navratri". Largely celebrated by women, this festival which comes after a fifteen day period of commemorating our ancestors is actually the kick off to the Festive season . For the past nine days women in Mumbai could be seen sporting different coloured saris for the nine different days

The nine Navratri colors for 2011 were:

Pratipada - September 28, 2011 (Wednesday) - Blue

Dwitiya/Tritiya - September 29 (Thursday) - Yellow

Chaturthi - September 30 (Friday) - Green
Panchami - October 1 (Saturday) - Grey
Sashti - October 2 (Sunday) - Orange
Saptami - October 3 (Monday) - White
Ashtami - October 4 (Tuesday) - Red
Navami - October 5 (Wednesday) - Purple

Vijayadasami - October 6 (Thursday) - Pink

The nights were transformed with bright lights and music into large parties where people danced away , dressed to the nines. At one time very popular with housing societies, this festival is now quite sober and restrained with most housing societies having just the one festival rather than 9 nights of pure fun.

While there are traditional ways of celebrating this festival ( some dance , some pray,) I chose to celebrate this festival by wearing a saree every day. Naturally this brought forth a lot of comments but I carried on regardless.

Dussera too is celebrated as the ultimate victory of good over evil when the Demon King Ravan was killed by Lord Ram in an epic battle to reclaim his wife Sita or when the Godess Durga slew the vicious demon Mahisasur who was creating havoc in our world when it was populated by such beings.

This victory is marked by decorating homes and vehicles with garlands, offering prayers to our tools of the trade, wearing new clothes and wishing one another with offerings of bauhinia leaves symbolising gold. People often buy gold on this day or start new ventures because this is one of those days where anything that is begun will do well.

One special tradition that I look forward to is Sudhaben's distribution of Jalebi Fafda - the quintessential Gujerati breakfast that she loves sharing with her friends. Ever since she moved into our building, she or her servant has rung the bell bright and early and delivered us this parcel of sheer bliss.

The past few years she has been sending a beautfully packed parcel from Morbiwala Haribhai Damodar & Sons, a shop based near her daughter's house at Prabhadevi. This of course is not half as good as the Jalebi fafda her husband used to source but I'm not complaining : eventually all hot crisp jalebis are hard to resist!

For those of you who want Sudhaben's Jalebis you could go to 7-9 Bhavanishankar Road, Near Kabutarkhana, Dadar ( W), Mumbai 400028. And to avoid disappointment, find out in advance by calling 2422 0652/2437 8927 to find out if any of their yummy jalebis are still available for sale!

Saifee Hospital - all lit up

2011-09-30T06:30:00.000+05:30

Ever since I spotted this magnificent sight overlooking Marine Drive, I was determined to capture it on my camera. I was told that this being the centenary year of the Bohra Muslim leader the Syedna , Saifee Hospital would be lit up on important days in their calendar to honour His Holiness.

I was lucky to grab these pictures as the year passes by soon enough and before we know it, will be saying hello to 2012!

The years are going by really fast bringing changes that are sometimes hard to fathom. Unknowingly things creep up on us and before we know it our lives have changed.

Going through my telephone book , I found several people who no longer exist, a thought made all the more scary by the fact that a person who is here today can easily be gone tomorrow.

Yesterday I heard at the Club that a young 44 year old man, fit as a fiddle and in fine shape just dropped dead on the Squash Court.

So I am glad I got these pictures at least once before the year is over!

Saifee Hospital is a beautiful structure that rises majestically behind the palm trees on Marine Drive. Actually situated on Charni Road, this multi speciality hospital confuses every one with its magnificent architutre. People ask : is it a hotel? It may well be with the luxurious service it provides its patients.

While I am glad to see such a beautiful sight, I do hope I never have to go to hospital - as a patient that is!

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