African Stories

The Year After (1/4): Dinner For Three

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Mon, 18 Dec 2017 23:36:00 -0800

Koku swaggered into Linda’s apartment like he was the landlord. He was excited, not only about seeing his girlfriend but also about the fact that Manchester United lost in the Manchester Derby to their city rivals. Although his team Liverpool did not win their match against Everton either, the Against Supporters Union (ASU) would rather troll the team that lost (Manchester United) than the team that drew (Liverpool).

This was the happiest Koku had been in the past seven days. Ghana’s social media marked a one year anniversary since the National Democratic Congress lost in the 2016 elections and the mockery was no joke. He remembered the events of the post-election days like it was a fight in which was pitilessly crushed. His body jarred with each post he was reminded to have made and the confidence with which he made those posts. His friends and the self-acclaimed social media troll masters and meme kings put a lot into ensuring that sympathizers of the now opposition party would not have a pleasant week.

Pain seared through his skin, especially when he remembered how much his future hinged on the victory of his political party. He thought of himself as the biggest loser in the elections. He had dedicated five years of his life to the National Democratic Congress and there was nothing to show for it.

The past week also reminded him of his severed relationship with Edem and Naa. Naa took seed in January and gave birth to a girl in September but Koku had not visited his brother and his sister-in-law yet. The guilt of his indiscretion last year sat deeply on his chest.

On a brighter side, the events of last year’s election brought Linda into his life – the best thing to have happened to him in the past year. And there was Kenny!

Koku grew attached to the baby boy after a vigilante group of the New Patriotic Party crossed him shortly after the elections and seized the campaign van he was driving. Linda was kind to let him use Kenny as much as he wanted. There was only one condition according to Linda.

“Make sure he is always clean and when he develops any faults, that’s your problem not mine”.

“Those are two conditions, you know?” Koku replied, readying his mouth for a banter. But Linda gave him the do-you-want-to-use-the-car-or-argue-with-me look and that was enough to stop Koku from saying another word.

Koku turned the door knob and made his way into the living room. The rich aroma of the what he suspected to be Jollof rice wafted down from the kitchen and beckoned him. He could not resist the delightful sensations that whipped up inside his memory at the mere thought of delving his teeth deep and fast into the soft grains. His mouth watered as he relished how cloves of pressed garlic, chillies, tomato paste, beef or chicken would feel on his tongue.

“Koku!” Linda shouted from the kitchen. “Did you remember to buy the sanitary pads for me?”

Silence.

“From your silence, I know you forgot it. Please, go back for it now”.

Pause.

“Otherwise, your nose will smell Canaan but your tongue won’t taste it”.

There was no word from Koku this time too but Linda heard the trapdoor squeal. “Good boy”, she thought, wearing a satisfying smile.

Her eyes wandered around the kitchen. Tea stained counters, dirty tea towel, tea stained mugs, chipped mugs, cracked mugs, odd assortment of cups, crumpled tea towel, dirty enamel mug, slimy draining board and unrinsed dishes. She cringed. The place did not speak well of her at all. A lady like her. She paused her thoughts but the noisy of hum of the refrigerator did not give her the peace of mind she thought she would get.

“Koku must help me clean this place tonight”, she said to herself and walked into the dining room.

The dining room was elegant in a minimalist sort of way, yet still echoed the natural world outside. The table dominated the space. It was an elongated ellipse of oak with the raw bark at the edges. Linda smiled anytime she sat at the table to eat. The importer told an interesting story about the dining set. The tree had been a victim of a violent storm a few years back, upended root ball and all. The two chairs on both ends came from the same tree, each one beautiful in its simplicity, all clean straight lines and high backs.

A navy-blue fabric laid on the table. On top of the fabric and right in the middle of the table was a bouquet of fresh flowers in water. The polished silver cutlery shone brightly in the dimly lit room. At both sides stood a tall empty wine glass and there were beautifully folded napkins to match the colour of the fabric laid on the table. All that was missing was the food and the people to eat it.

“Today is the day”, Linda said to herself. She could not wait to break the news to Koku. The romantic dinner and sending her boyfriend back to the shop were all leading to the big announcement planned for after dessert.

She knew he would be excited to hear it but she was still anxious to see his reaction. This would change everything for two of them. The excitement made her breathing rapid and shallow. She could feel her pulse pounding in her temples.

It was a relief to hear a knock on the door.

“Speak of the devil”, that was indistinct. Then on top of her voice, “Silly you! When did you start knocking before entering this house?”.

It was obvious it was not Koku at the door. Or, he was playing his usual pranks on her.

“Young man, if you think I’m coming to the door to meet you, forgerrit!”

Still, there was no movement into the room. Linda gave up and walked to the entrance.

She lost her balance when she saw who was at the door. She leaned on the mull post to prevent her from falling. Her mouth shivered. She wanted to say something but…

“You look like I just pulled a rhinoceros from my pocket”, the elderly man at the door made light of the situation and let himself in. Linda followed him silently. She was still in shock.

“This place smells good”. He continued, casting his eyes across the room. “Is that Jollof I smell?” He walked towards the dining room. “Oh, nice. Looks like you were expecting me”, he turned to look at Linda who had still not recovered from the surprise.

Seeing that she could not respond, the man went on. “Oh, I am sure it is not for me. It’s for your boyfriend. Dinner for two, huh?” Pause. Sigh. “Can we make that three?”

To be continued…

A Place Called Mumudom: Lagbaja Speaks From Behind Mask

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Thu, 7 Dec 2017 11:07:00 -0800

Lagbaja

I am no political analyst but clearly the silence or indifference of most Nigerians on critical issues is worrisome and I fear for the future.

The attitude of “na there problem or wetin I fit do” must be addressed.

Dear Okey Ndibe: Thank you for sounding the alarm in a way that should make us reflect deeper. Mumu is not a condition I proudly proclaim. It was with a heavy heart that I came to this shocking realisation that we are indeed a country of mumus. Harsh as it might sound, no other explanation would suffice. It is apparent that the “leaders” know that they would always get away with whatever incredible schemes they concoct because, amongst other reasons,

(a) the mumu people they “lead” are no different from their mumu “leaders” in character

(b) the mumu people are gullible, superstitious and naive

(d) these mumus never demand accountability from their “leaders”

(e) the mumus expect their rulers to loot or would otherwise consider them foolish

Apologies for the seeming overgeneralization but the vast majority runs with this mumu mindset.

There is a limit to how much one can squeeze into a song before sounding less music than sermon. Please permit me to expatiate using your perimeter of “recent events in the past week or two”.

For simplicity I would use a numbered list to analyse and highlight a few seemingly disparate but absurd mumurity examples and indicators.

1. 5 members trying to impeach a governor would make you think there are probably only 6 or 7 members of the House of Assembly. According to the assembly’s website there are 31 members. For mumus, 5 out 31 constitutes a majority.

2. In the land of mumus you can make your own mace and confer it with automatic authority, elect a “new Speaker” and swear him in.

3. No single hospital in Nigeria to entrust the unfortunately injured member with. He had to be flown to the UK.

4. Flown abroad … likely on tax payers’ account

5. Treated … likely on tax payers’ account

6. Visited by officials… likely on tax payers’ account (business or first class tickets?)

7. Nyesom Wike the Minister of State who led the visit was until recently the Governor’s (Amaechi’s) Chief of Staff. He was allegedly nominated for the Ministerial position by Governor Amaechi.

8. Shouldn’t the mumus wonder how Nyesom Wike as Minister of State for Education found the time for this all important trip while abandoning his post in spite of the raging crisis in his ministry with the Academic staff union of Nigerian universities currently on strike? Well the mumu staff and students can rot in hell I guess.

9. Madam Patience would probably have “visited” too, if not for the noise such would generate. So for now, the victim suffers alone.

10. The erstwhile pontificating police boss of the State could not find the patient’s prominent attacker for over a week.

11. Madam Patience having first denied any involvement in the crisis while verbally attacking Soyinka, eventually owns up “pouring out her grievances”.

12. She owns up to a group of visiting Bishops who came on a peace making mission to find a lasting solution to the crisis in their region. Religion is always an easy scapegoat and tool of deception in mumudom.

13. Why would you even think that the Bishops would go back empty handed? Any “transport fare/thank-you-for-coming”, if received, would have likely been financed on tax payers’ account.

14. And why are we ranting about “tax payers”? Why are the tax payers not furious over the incessant misappropriation and misapplication of their hard earned contributions? The answer lies in the question… Aside from PAYE, how many are compliant in mumudom?

15. First a set of 5 Governors and 3 Deputy Governors (representing their respective Governors), left their duty posts for a solidarity visit with the embattled Governor of Rivers State… of course to the detriment of tax payers. (a) They were not on leave, but left urgent work and duties behind for the “emergency” solidarity visit. (b) Flight to and fro Port Harcourt of course likely on tax payers’ account.

16. They were closely followed by a second set of 4 commiserating sympathetic Governors. Of course, again likely on tax payers’ account.

17. Madam Patience’s grievance, as she divulged to the visiting Bishops, started when Governor Amaechi refused to be governed by her, as he would not listen to her veiled orders on how to govern the State… which incidentally is her primary territory being her State of origin. Mumus have no problem with that, fully being in harmony with her as she sings as first lady in Abuja while simultaneously dancing in absentia as Permanent Secretary in Bayelsa and conducting the orchestra in home state, Rivers.

Click here for Series stories.

18. Madam ends her confession to the Bishops by saying that Amaechi is her son as she is obviously the mother of everyone in mumudom. The question all mumus should ask is, “Would a good mother promote the demise of her child?”

19. Where was her outraged sense of motherhood when Senators were busy voting to turn mumudom into a Nation of pedophiliacs at the expense of her innocent “daughters”?

20. Where was her outraged sense of “mother of the Nation” when the video of 5 gang rapists went viral. Has she used that “mother of the Nation” power to find the culprits? Not a priority in mumudom.

21. Where was her outraged “motherhood of mumudom” when 46 school children were murdered in Yobe? Indeed the whole Nation of mumus have just gone on with their more important mumu lives like nothing happened.

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22. Which brings us to the insane mumurity that gives the “leaders” confidence to try pranks such as the attempt at crafting the under age marriage law, knowing that with the mumus… “nothing go happen”

23. In the land of mumus, the rulers know they can always throw in the religious card, so Senator Yerima leads the child slavery onslaught with the religious chant.

24. While all this was going on, 79 year old OPC founder, Dr. Fasheun was, in his own description, “delivering” Mustapha to Kano.

25. Soon after, Gumsu Sani Abacha had the courage to rant on social media about her proud heritage… because with the mumus who his father savagely ruled over… nothing go happen.

26. Gumsu even called Soyinka who was a victim of her beloved dad’s misrule, “Mad empty Professor” … because in mumudom, “nothing go happen”.

27. Final scores… Jang 13, Amaechi 19, but in the land of mumus Mathematics has a different interpretation for 13 is greater than 19. Even the President of the mumus ratifies that.

28. By the way, both Governors Jang and Amaechi are from the same imploding political party.

29. Jang says he is old enough to be Amaechi’s father… a common escape route that is often quickly bought by the mumu populace. Old enough to be the President’s pawn and to upturn justice might be more like it. Only possible when you know for sure that your people are mumus… Nothing go happen.

30. The Governor is supposed to be the chief security officer of his State, but apparently in mumudom, his Police Commissioner is his boss.

31. The Governor’s security staff could be so easily withdrawn because nothing is institutionalized in a Nation of mumus. The loyalty of the security personnel is not based on the constitution but on personal or maternal affiliations. The mumus keep watching because “it does not concern me o”… “Big men and women are fighting”. Same way the injustice of the Nation’s attorney general’s assassination does not concern them.

32. Most reports in the Nigerian media kept referring to the self appointed Speaker as if he were truly the substantive Speaker. A mere use of “self-acclaimed” would have been logical, but they were already calling him the Speaker because… ignorance? inducement? resignation to the belief that the 5 vs 26 Assembly coup was already a done deal?

33. While all this drama unfolded, Nigeria, like the proverbial head-burying ostrich felt it had the moral right to insist on democratic processes in Egypt.

34. Sahara Reporters had screamed about the underhand conspiracy to proclaim Mustapha “not guilty”. Mumus simply went about their daily mumurity unperturbed because “it doesn’t concern them”. And when it happened as predicted… no problem. Mumus continue dem jolly as if nothing happened.

35. Meanwhile, Daniel and his political supporters carried their politics into the house of God at Rueben Abati’s mother’s funeral service… simply because there is no true reverence for God. Religion is a safe hiding cave. The mumus in the congregation would never protest such sacrilege because… “it is not strange” as the houses of God are now also political grounds. Obasanjo built one in Abeokuta. Jonathan got one built in Otuoke.

36. Meanwhile, some other mumus were again busy putting the Nation to international shame. In unprecedented match fixing fiascos, Police Machine beat Bubayaro 67-0 while Plateau United Feeders beat Akurba FC 79-0. Just in case you are confused, the game was soccer, not basketball.

37. The matches were to determine which one of the two tied teams would be promoted into… wait for this… just the 3rd division of the Nigerian soccer league. How many goals would they have to orchestrate when they want promotion to the 1st division?

38. Interesting to note that one of the teams involved in these shows of shame, the Police Machine, represents the Police Force. Now who would investigate this scandal?

39. Mumus involved in the conspiracy had to include players… team management… referees and other match officials… spectatorshuh That is quite a large mumu cooperative.

40. Since four teams were involved, multiply the number of conspirators by 4 (except match officials and spectators which should be multiplied by “only” 2). Hence, the scam was done in the open. It was a confident public show of shame. No… two confident simultaneous scams. No problem as corruption is everywhere.

41. Before the matches, Police Machine and Plateau United were level on points, goal difference and goals scored, and each was playing its final match which would determine which team would get elevated into the 3rd division league. Plateau United scored 72 of its 79 goals in the second half, thereby averaging more than one goal per minute. This would necessarily include the time needed to celebrate each goal, retrieve the ball, bring it back to the center, wait for the referee’s whistle before kicking off again…. after each goal. 72 times. Or did they just write the preferred figures as we typically do on election day?

42. Is it not curious that neither of the two losing teams could manage a single consolation goal? What else are we if not mumus?

MUST READ:ADVOCATE FOR A HAPPY MARRIAGE.

43. Then there was the innocent man who was freed by the high court in Owerri after having been unjustly incarcerated for seven years, “awaiting trial”. No compensation… nobody held accountable for his ordeal. He insisted on being taken back to the prison as that was his only guaranty of a roof over his head and a daily meal. It was merely a “small thing” in the daily bizarre news as mumus went about their daily mumurity with their typical mentality of “e no concern me”.

44. Remember that this is mostly a snippet of the past two weeks or so. But there is more… 20 year old Chijioke Nwankor allegedly Molests a 9 year old pupil to death in Calabar. Reportedly in his own words, he asked her to bend down in the uncompleted building because it was too dirty to lie down as the place was being used as a public toilet. That is mumudom parlance for faeces shamelessly defecated all over the ground. Could the defecation be by aliens from outer space?

45. Well… thankfully, there is always a little ray of sunlight sneaking through the dark jungle. A Briton who was kidnapped by an armed gang shortly after arrival in Lagos, has been released.

…All in just the past two weeks or so in mumudom.

Excuse me, I have to return to work. I need to earn £3000 for my British visa. Wait a minute, did I tell you I am still a Commonwealth citizen?

Lágbájá

10 Types of 30-Year-Old Single Guys By Tim Urban

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Thu, 7 Dec 2017 10:47:00 -0800

30-year-old guys are a curious bunch.

Find me a group of 30-year-old men and I’ll pick out one overgrown frat dude living with roommates, another guy who just dropped his two kids off at school, a few who are well into their careers and a couple soul-searchers looking for work. Some will tell you that they’ve finally figured it all out and some more will say they feel hopeless for the first time in their lives. It’s a motley crew.

But perhaps the motliest part of this crowd is the ever-growing group of 30-year-old single guys. If you want a case study in humanity, 30-year-old single guys have pretty much all the bases covered. Let’s examine some of the common types:

1) The Total Package
total package
The Total Package is smart—he went to a top college. The Total Package is an athlete, a musician, and an avid traveler. The Total Package is handsome—and you better believe he’s well-groomed.
The Total Package has a hell of a career going, but don’t you for a second suggest that The Total Package would be a workaholic—The Total Package is a family man.

There’s just one thing The Total Package seems to be having a hard time finding—a girl worthy of his greatness.

Yes, the woman fit for The Total Package will be the ultimate icing on his cake of perfection. He imagines her often—gorgeous as they come, she turns heads; bursting with charm and charisma, she lights up every room she enters; she’s a brilliant rising star in her career and beloved by her many friends. And that’s just her public persona—at home, she’s fantastic in bed, a spectacular cook, loving, selfless, and devoted. Oh and she also speaks French, plays tennis, sings beautifully, reads voraciously and she’s a history buff. His Juliet.

ALSO READ:Africa's proverb of the day

Unsurprisingly, The Total Package is single. He’s immersed in a fierce battle between his superhuman standards and his terror of being 40 and single—because 40 and single is not supposed to be part of The Total Package’s story.

2) The New Lease On Life Guy

lease on life

As long as anyone can remember, The New Lease On Life Guy had been dating his longterm girlfriend. He never seemed that happy in the relationship, but everyone just assumed they would eventually get married. Now, after a long and difficult breakup, The New Lease On Life Guy has reemerged with a bang and is suddenly acting like he just got called down on The Price Is Right. He’s not really sure how to be single but he’s goddamn happy he is, and he’s sure as hell going out tonight.

He’s also the arch-nemesis of The Resigned Fiance, who’s in an equally unhappy relationship but just kind of kept going with it, unable to resist the sweet, sweet inertia, and who most certainly does not want to hear about The New Lease On Life Guy’s latest exploits.

3) The Guy Who Has To Marry Someone Of The Same Ethnicity Or His Parents Will Never Speak To Him Again
ethnicity

It’s hard enough finding someone to be your life partner, and this guy’s parents are really not making things any easier. He tried to rebel briefly, but after his last girlfriend was not allowed in his parents’ house, causing her to cry, he gave up on that.

He’d also really appreciate it if his mother would stop setting him up on dates.
Also read:Truth About sin

4) The Misogynist
misogynist

The Misogynist hates women, and women hate The Misogynist. The Misogynist doesn’t know a whole lot about the other gender, but he can tell you the exact number of them he’s slept with—214.

He did quite well with girls back in his earlier days when many were in their attracted to assholes phase, but lately, only those with the lowest self-esteem seem to gravitate towards him.

The Misogynist’s close cousin is The Perpetual Cheater. They’re different but they understand each other.

5) The Guy Who Peaked Too Early
peaked early

Back in the day, The Guy Who Peaked Too Early had everything a 17-year-old girl could ever dream of. His sky-high confidence carried him smoothly through college, and no one was surprised when he landed a smart, sweet, beautiful girlfriend in his early 20s. But The Guy Who Peaked Too Early was just getting started. There was a field that needed to be played, and he broke up with his girlfriend when he was 24.

Now it’s seven years later, his hair got bored and left, and his high school lacrosse glory isn’t part of the conversation that much these days. And he’s noticing that girls like his ex-girlfriend don’t seem to be all that into him anymore. Realizing this about five years after everyone else, he takes a deep sigh and cranks his standards down a few big notches.

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6) The Guy Who’s Finally a Good Catch

Finally a Good Catch

On the other side of the coin, after losing some weight, getting decent clothes, and having early career success, The Guy Who’s Finally a Good Catch is getting more attention each week than he got in his first 25 years combined. Girls find it endearing that such an appealing guy has managed to maintain his humility, when it’s actually just that he’s assuming every girl is out of his league at all times.

Once his new situation starts to sink in, he enters an unfortunate new phase, stressing his male friends out by doing things like winking at them over the shoulder of a girl he’s dancing with and offering them a fist pound when an attractive girl walks by on the street.

7) The Normal Guy Who Just Hasn’t Met The Right Girl Yet And He Really Wishes People Would Stop Looking At Him With Those Pitying Eyes
normal guy

Ah, The NGWJHMTRGYAHRWPWSLAHWTPE. The NGWJHMTRGYAHRWPWSLAHWTPE is enjoying his life. He likes his job, he likes his friends, and he likes being single just fine. He’s in no rush to be in a relationship and feels totally confident that at some point, he’ll meet the right girl and get married.

He’s also not quite sure why everyone who knows him is trying to figure out “what the problem is.” His parents are worried, never wasting an opportunity to ask him if he’s been dating anyone. His friends want to help, setting him up on dates every chance they get. He appreciates all the unsolicited support, but he also thinks it would be pretty great if everyone stopped thinking there was something wrong with him.

8) The Aggressively Online Dating Guy Who Can’t Believe He’s Not Married Yet
can't believe not married

The opposite of the previous guy, The Aggressively Online Dating Guy Who Can’t Believe He’s Not Married Yet can’t believe he’s not married yet. Through high school, college and his twenties, he was always The Guy With A Girlfriend. He spent years enjoying pitying his single friends, and somehow, he’s now 30 and single.

He has four online dating profiles, and when people ask him if he’s dating anyone, he explains that he’s just too busy with his career right now for a relationship.

9) The In-The-Closet Guy
in the closet

The In-The-Closet Guy is so close to being the perfect catch—he’s handsome, he’s well-dressed, and he has a great job. He’s funny, articulate, and charming. The only tiny little inconvenience is that he’s not attracted to females whatsoever.

His antithesis is The NGWJHMTRGYAHRWPWSLAHWTPE, who’s had just enough of the theories about him being gay, since he’s completely straight and, for the hundredth time, just hasn’t met the right girl yet and is really very okay with being single right now.

10) The Guy Who Has Just Fully Quit At This Point
quit

The Guy Who Has Just Fully Quit At This Point never tried that hard in the first place, but at least there used to be a semblance of effort. He doesn’t like going to bars, refuses to try online dating, and both the bong and the X-Box are back in the living room following their brief stint in the closet after his friend gave him a pep talk one day four months ago.

Deep down, The Guy Who Has Just Fully Quit At This Point is pretty frightened about a lot of things, but his fear manifests itself in indifferent denial, and passivity usually prevails. There is only one way that things change for The Guy Who Has Just Fully Quit At This Point, and that’s to find himself squarely in the sights of The Girl Who Relentlessly Pursues. Until then, the whole thing isn’t really his issue.

[Daily Tips]Ways to fix your wife - when she is falling apart(For all Men)

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Mon, 20 Nov 2017 14:51:00 -0800

Your wife can be dying in silence while still performing her wifely duties. You will need to know her to know when she needs to be fixed.

When a woman is always moody, cries a lot, yells on Children, can easily sleep or sleeps a lot, she may be battling with something you are not careful enough to see.

A real man will not allow his wife to fall apart without fixing her and making her better and happy.
If you discover your wife is falling apart, watch out and fix the following:
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1. CHECK IF YOU ARE THE PROBLEM
You might be her problem, but out of her respect and love for you, she may not tell you. Ask, let her talk sincerely
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2. BE AWARE OF HER RESPONSIBILITIES
Get to know how her work load is killing her. Regardless of whether she stays at home or goes to work, do you know what she does all day? If you don’t, ask her. Her to-do list is probably overflowing with tasks that far outweighs her time and energy.
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3. BE APPRECIATIVE
Be mindful of her needs and appreciative of her sacrifices. The work a woman does at home can be too common that nobody will appreciate her for them, this can be killing her. Appreciate your wife

4. GET INVOLVED BEFORE SHE BURNS OUT
Don’t just be appreciative, but get involved. The best time to begin helping your wife is now. Don’t wait until she breaks down to offer a helping hand.
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5. GET MACHINE
Get all the machine needed for her work at home (the ones you can afford). Dish washer, gas cooker, refrigerator, oven, laundering Machine, etc
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6. BE AN ACTIVE PARTICIPANT
Be totally involved at home, stop delegating parenting and family life. Don’t be a “visiting Professor”, be an active partner in this business of your life. It takes two to parent. It takes two to make a marriage work. It takes two to run a household. Be fully involved in every aspect of your family life.
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7. HOLD HER
Hold her like a lover and a friend. Place your hands on her shoulder, her laps, hold her hands, just hold her and let her feel you.
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8. JUST LISTEN
Men are known to be good talker but very bad listeners. At times what your wife needs is for you to just listen. Do not interrupt, let her unburden, let her talk. Sometimes the best way for a woman to reset is by getting all of her thoughts out. Let your wife talk through her feelings and problems. Show empathy. Listen carefully. Ask questions. Be fully engaged in the conversation.
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9. BE A PARTNER NOT A TEACHER
Most men do fall into the “Teaching trap” when they are supposed to be a partner, showing love and consideration. Do not blame, just be there for her. Just listen. That’s all you need to do. And if she wants you to offer solutions, she’ll ask for them
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10. GIVE HER HOPE
No matter what happens, don’t ever raise up your hands in surrender. Giving up, crying or weeping will hurt your wife more. Encourage her. Let her know what you love about her. Help her see the good in any situation. Avoid being critical or negative. When she has hit the rock bottom, be the man who lifts her up, and brings light and hope back into her life.

11. BE SENSITIVE
Get to know her mood, get to know her needs, get to know what is needed to be done at home and do them without prompting.
Learn the art of looking around the house and finding things that need to get done. Are there dishes in the sink? What is broken that needs to be fixed? Don’t wait to be asked. Just do it!

12. PRAY FOR HER
Take your time off to pray for her, hand her over to her maker who knows the deepest need of her heart . Let God fix her, you can’t do it.
Let God know what you appreciate about her. Ask for his help. Ask him to tell you how you can be a better spouse to her. Ask him to comfort her and help her see herself as He see her.
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13. PRAY WITH HER
Don’t just pray for your wife, find time to pray with her, hug her as you pray together, hold her hands, just talk to your maker together.
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14. ASK HER HOW YOU CAN BE OF HELP
Your wife knows what you can do to help her reset, so just ask her. She will open up to you, it may not be what you think, so don’t speculate, ask, She’ll appreciate it more than you will ever know.
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15. HELP AROUND THE HOUSE
Give a helping hand around the house. Give her a kitchen holiday for some days, do all the cooking or hire somebody to do it for you. Let her just sit, eat and rest, this may be all she needs,
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16. TAKE HER OUT
Take her out, eat out, go to the cinema, go to wherever she will love to go, not where you want, just follow her.
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17. ALLOW HER TO CRY, IF SHE MUST
“Stop crying, are you a baby?, will you be crying about this little thing?” This is what most nude earning husband will do when their wives cry, what an insensitive word. If she feels like crying, hold her to yourself and let her do the crying while you pat her on the back. It’s a great way to fix the problem.
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18. LET HER GO ON HOLIDAY
Allow her to go on holiday all alone to herself, this can fix the problem as she returns with greater energy.
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19. CELEBRATE HER
Let your wife be celebrated. Celebrate her in secret and in public. Talk about her beauty, motherhood, wife hood, support, thoughtfulness. This will make her happy.

I'll also recommend this article for you: What kills Marriage

[Daily Tips]WHAT KILLS MARRIAGE?

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Mon, 20 Nov 2017 10:25:00 -0800

Today, I'll be talking about the major issues in Relationships and their causes.

Especially MARRIAGE!!!

Laziness kills marriage

Suspicion kills marriage

Lack of trust kills marriage

Lack of mutual respect kills marriage

Unforgiveness kills marriage (Forgiveness is not optional but mandatory)

Arguments kills marriage

Keeping secrets from your spouse kills marriage

Every form of infidelity kills marriage (financial, emotional, psychological, material, etc)

Poor communication kills marriage

Lies easily kills marriage, be sincere to your spouse in every aspect.

Relating more with your parents than your spouse kills marriage

Lack of, inadequate or unenjoyable sex kills marriage.

Nagging kills marriage

Too much talk and careless talk kills marriage

Spending less or little time with your spouse kills marriage

Being too independent minded kills marriage

Love for party, money and spending/partying kills marriage

Exposing the inadequacies of your spouse to your parents or siblings kills marriage

Not being steadfast/fervent in the spirit kills not only marriage but your life

Spurning correction and reprimand kills marriage.

Always wearing a sad face and being moody kills marriage.

FEMINISM ADVOCACY kills marriage.

Uncontrolled or hot temperament kills marriage.

Not understanding your role and position in marriage as instituted by God kills marriage.

Not being sensitive to the spiritual, emotional and physical needs of your spouse kills marriage

When anything threatens the position/security of a wife, her reaction(s) will be detrimental to her marriage.

Lack of the knowledge of the word of God kills marriage.

.Please, save a marriage today by sharing this.

May God bring healing to every troubled home and family.

FROM AFRICAN ENT TEAM.

[Article]"THE MARRIAGE VOW"

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Mon, 20 Nov 2017 09:56:00 -0800

Hmm, I have a confession to make;

... I hate weddings! Yes I do.

Don't get me wrong, I love the jollof rice, the sallad, the free drinks, the couple entrance, all the fun, glamour, prewedding everything and the preparedness that comes with it, but there is one part of the wedding that I really wish we can delete from the ceremony, one part that contradicts our faith as believers, one part that negates our faith declarations and makes us look like we don't know what we're doing before God, sadly, it is the most important part of the wedding - and that is 'the exchange of marriage vow.'

Let me share with you an encounter I had at a friend's wedding some time ago;

I was at this amazing wedding one day, beautifully decorated auditorium, beautiful couple, bright lights sparkling down the chandeliers on the altar, every guest in white, amazing theme, everything was going so well until it got to the part where the bride and groom stepped up to exchange their vows, hmmm, it felt like God came down to sit beside me on the pew, because the encounter I had that day couldn't have been anything short of God's voice inside my head.

As the Reverend started with the usual 'please repeat after me' marriage vow;

"I Marilyn, take you Sam,
to be my lawfully wedded husband,
To have and to hold,
From this day forward,
For better for WORSE,
for richer for POORER,
in SICKNESS and in health,
In plenty and in LACK,
in joy and in SORROW,
Till death do us part."

Oh father! As the bride was repeating those words the next thing my spirit said to me was

"Allison, as a single person, do you know poverty?
I said no Lord.

" Do you know pain and sorrow?"
I said no Lord, I don't.
Don't miss this:Blissful Home Tonic

"Is sickness not strange to you?"
I said yes Lord, it is.

"Is lack and wants a part of your faith confessions?"
I said no Lord, it isn't.

"Have I allowed you to go through worse before?"
"I said No Lord, you haven't.

" Do you think I will let you experience in marriage what I never permitted you to experience as a single person?"
I said Never Lord, never!

"Then Why then do you come before me on the marriage altar to confess strange things in my presence? Why do you plan to experience in marriage those things you didn't experience as a single person? What do you mean by in sickness, in pain, in sorrow, in lack and in poverty? Are these things the state of affairs in Heaven? Why do you pray for a heaven on earth marriage only to come preparing to experience things that do not exist there?

Hmmmm, this time I had no answer, I was dumb in a trance, I looked at everyone clapping and screaming as the bride finished her recital and it became clear how mumucious we were, it felt like we all came dressed in white without knowing what we are doing, I felt embarrassed, I couldn't reply Him, He is right, we really do not pay attention to the words we exchange as a vow, we just wear fancy suits and pretty dresses to go and contradict the faith we hold as believers.

What sickness are you talking about? The same sickness that is not permitted to be found among you? What poverty and lack when God's sole wish is for us to prosper and be in health? What sorrow are you going to tell God again? When His joy is our strength, when His Joy comes new upon us every morning, so what sorrow are you talking about as a believer?

When you start experiencing lack, sickness and sorrow in your marriage it is still God you will come running to, forgetting it was you who asked for it because black tux and white gown was sweeting you to wear!

You cannot sing 'the Lord shall supply all my needs according to His riches in glory' and then match to the marriage altar to go and say 'for poorer and for lacker'...

You cannot sing Ron Kenoly's "righteousness, peace, joy in the Holy Ghost" as a single person and then go and be talking about 'for sorrow and for pain' at the marriage altar.

What other afflictions are you talking about when God has already told you in Exodus 15:26 that His blessings shall be on your food and water and He will take sickness away from you?

If you don't have what to say as a vow just sing this song to each other and carry your wife to your house in peace;

"I pray for you,
You pray for me,
I love you, I need you to survive.
I won't harm you,
With words of my mouth,
I love you, I need you to survive.
It is His will that every need be supplied,
You are important to me,
I need you to survive"

These words alone is stronger than all those sickness and pain you're going to be talking before God.

Com'on Jesus gang, this is a generation where God is revealing Himself to us in full, this is one of the things that sets us apart from the others, that we know the truth and it sets us free, that we understand every word that comes out of our mouth is a declaration, that tradition will never take the place of God's word, we are God's heirs, we carry the book of the law everywhere we go, dare to be different!

You had better start getting used to the protocols in Heaven if you want a Heaven on earth marriage. Don't invite me to your wedding if all you're going there to talk about is sickness and poverty, I am not a witness to sorrow!

I hope someone caught this?
#confessionsofagoodman

Drop your comment below!!!

[Daily Tips]WHO DOES THE TOUGH JOB?

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Mon, 20 Nov 2017 09:50:00 -0800

And so on Monday, i decided to service my car. Engine oil #6K , oil filter #3K , labour and diagnostic cost #10K.

To cap it all i filled the gas tank up with just #12K . Total cost #31K!
So as i was going back to the office on Tuesday a terrible thought began to gather in my mind.

I asked myself, how much have I spent this year to service my body? We have just lost a dear friend and colleague to the cold hands of death.

I was told he only complained of toothache and slight headache and then death struck! For how long will I keep thinking all is well with my health in spite of all odds?
Also Read:Tips on how to prevent Cancer
I drive through dust at times, inhale all kind of unclean air, drink some water I don't know their sources, face computer and phone with my eyes everyday, expose to phone radiation every hour and on and on and on.

If my car could gulp over #30K at an instant just for fine tuning i think i deserve to diagnose and upgrade my system.

Who is doing the tough job, you or your car?
When last did you check up your system, my friends?

*Check your eyes, ears, vital organs like heart, liver and lungs. Check your cholesterol, blood-sugar level and do urinalysis*. It could make a difference.

[Daily Tips] Cancer Prevention.

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Mon, 20 Nov 2017 09:25:00 -0800

After a conference on cancer prevention
Some interesting points came up;

1. No to refined oil
2. No to milks of animal origin (e.g. nido.)
3. No to cubes
4. No to the consumption of the gasified juices of the different breweries (32 pieces of sugar per liter)
5. No refined sugars
6. No Microwave
7. No to mammography before delivery but echomamaire
8. No to too tight bras going to or after returning from work
9. No alcohol
10. No for reheating frozen meals
11. No to the conservation of water in the refrigerator in plastic bottles ...
12. All contraceptive pills are not good because they change the woman's homonal system and give cancer.
13. Deodorants are dangerous especially when used after shaving.
14. Breast-feeding women are less likely to have breast cancer than none breast-feeding women.
15. Cancer cells eat mainly sugar, everything is synthetic sugar even brown.
16. A cancer patient who suppresses sugar in his diet sees his disease regressed and can live long: sugar = deadly enemy.
17. A glass of beer stays 5 hours in the body and during this time the organs of the system are operating at idle speed.

Yes to:

1. Vegetables
2. Honey in measured quantities in place of sugar
3. Vegetable proteins such as beans versus meat
4. Two glasses of water on an empty stomach before brushing teeth, water kept in the room having the same temperature as we woke up
5. Unheated Meals
6. Anti cancer juice: aloe vera + ginger + parsley + celery + promaline (middle of the pineapple) mix and drink on an empty stomach.
7. Other anti-cancer juice: corossol (seedless) + promaline.
8. Eat the raw or cooked carrot or juice each day.

Just to share this information
The association of American doctors has given answers to the cause of cancer.

1. Do not drink hot tea in a plastic cup.
2. Do not eat anything hot in a paper or plastic bag. Example: potato (fried).
3. Do not cook microwavable foods using plastic material

As a reminder :
When plastic is in contact with heat, this creates chemicals that can cause 52 types of cancer.

This message is better than 100 unnecessary SMS.
Inform your loved ones in order to be free from these effects.

⚠ Avoid drinking Coca Cola on pineapple or after you have eaten pineapple as a dessert.
Do not mix pineapple juice with Cocacola.
This mixture is deadly! People are dying there and they mistakenly believe that they were poisoned .... They were victims of their ignorance of this fatal cocktail!

Sms to share with loved ones.
May God preserve us

Dr. Richard from the United States.
Share this message with your loved ones.
Important Health Tips:

Answer calls to the left ear.

Do not take your medication with cold water ....

Do not eat heavy meals after 5 pm.

Drink more water in the morning, less at night.

Best sleep time is 10pm - 4am.

Do not lie down immediately after taking medication or meals.

When your phone's battery is low at the last bar, do not answer the phone, because the radiation is 1000 times more powerful.

Can you pass this on to the people you love?

©African Daily Tip

[Article]SEE THE REASON WHY MEN ALWAYS ASK YOU FOR SEX.

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Mon, 20 Nov 2017 06:01:00 -0800

I want to change some ladies' mindset today. I'm going to be real and down to earth with this article.
The way some ladies complain men are always asking them for sex really baffles me.
Why sex, why not marriage proposal?
Why do men always want to sleep with you?
1.CHECK YOUR DRESSING:
A female body means nothing to her. You are used to seeing your breasts and every soft body part all your life. It doesn't mean a thing to you but to guys it means the universe!
Men are moved by sight. Wearing arm-less (exposing your shaved armpit and upper arm) can turn a man on, not to talk of the low neck line exposing the cleavage of
your breasts. Tight trousers, tights (pants hose) which
shows the shape of your buttock, mini and micro mini skirts exposing your thigh all can make a man go wild!
Better face reality now and mind the way you dress.
2. LEARN HOW TO SIT:
Some ladies don't know how to sit. Especially the
skirt wearing sisters. You sit in front of a guy and open your laps, what do you want him to see? A trance?
Yeah, he saw a lot of it! Always close your thigh when you are sitting whether in front of a guy or not.
Not sitting very well can become a habit and follow you around. And you wonder why all the brothers in the church wants to sleep with you!
3. YOU TOUCH MEN A LOT:
Ladies who touch, hug and wrap themselves around guys are sexual magnets to sexually immature guys.
Why are you always hugging and pecking, for what? Can't you talk without touching, holding and hugging someone?
Some even sit on their friends lap and say it doesn't matter. He is just a brother in Christ. He would soon be a lover in bed. Learn to control your emotions around the opposite sex. If you must hug, hug and peck slightly and you still need to be careful.
4. CALLING MEN PET NAMES:
Some people just throw around the word "dear" as
if it is a second language!
Why would you give all the guys in your life pet names?
Also Read this :[Article] I AM A WOMAN!!!
You say, thanks dear, okay sweetie, see you dearie, bye love, etc., you are looking for serious trouble. Words like this turns a man on.
5. YOU PRAISE MEN TOO MUCH:
This shouldn't be a problem at all but experience has taught me that men are attracted and eventually turned on by women who praise them silly! You can compliment men if you want to but be discreet and casual about it. Don't over do anything. Telling a guy, whao! what a nice moustache you've got! or that muscle on your arm can make any lady go crazy for you is indirectly telling him you like his body and wouldn't mind if he sleeps with you.
6. YOU POST SEDUCTIVE PICTURES ON THE SOCIAL MEDIA:
When I see the way some ladies pose on facebook, I wonder what they are really looking for.
Why pouting? Do you want him to kiss you?
Why turn your buttock to the camera? Do you want him to see how big it is?
Why focus on your chest? Do you want him to know you have firm breasts?
What is the purpose of the purpose of the pictures you are posting? I really get worried when I see these pictures. You can't have my comments when you post such.
7. YOU SLEEP AT YOUR FIANCE'S HOUSE
Why are you in a hurry to sleep under the same roof with a man? Why are you in a hurry? What is your
problem? Some ladies can't wait for a man to propose. They pack their bags and move to his house immediately. For what?
And when that one gets tired of the sex, he sends them
packing and we
are here listening to all their tales of woe!
Some don't even expect their man to ask for sex. Aaah? Show me a monkey who doesn't jump at every sight of banana.
You will be addressed the way you dress. If they are always asking you for sex, then Check what is wrong and fix it.

[Article]LOST BUT NOT FOUND!

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Sun, 19 Nov 2017 13:46:00 -0800

Ponder on these things!

She gave her car key to the youngest child in the car while she went to buy some stuff in the mall.

Upon her return, the boy had misplaced the key and the whole family was stranded on the road. Observing her discomfort with innocent kids without a masculine shepherd, I joined the search party.

For each passing minute without the key, she landed the boy that had the key with a slap or a concentrated curse!

After few minutes, she strayed in frustration into a motorbike's way and was knocked down. It was in the process of helping her up and picking the pieces of her belongings that the car key was found. She had already lost herself before the key was found!

Many people lose themselves in search of what is missing in their lives.

Many lose their moral limb while searching for the "missing rib"!

Some lose their health while searching for material wealth.

I know those who lost their message while searching for relevance and sponsors.

Some lose their marriage while searching for a mirage.

Some have lost their integrity while looking for affinity.

Don't get missing because something was lost. Sometimes, you just need to ignore the emotional missing link so you can remain spiritually connected.

Don't lose your mind because the job is lost.

Don't lose your children while searching for their school fees.

Don't lose your ministry while searching for tithes and offerings.

Don't lose your mantle while searching for a title.

When those things are eventually discovered or acquired, greater things (yourself, relationship, character, values & virtues) would have probably dissolved!

The apostles were looking for peace in the midst of storm, but by the time Jesus restored calmness they have lost their faith....

Similar way Elimelech lost his life and sons in search of greener pastures.

When you eventually hammer that deal, will your nail still be strong enough to hold the woods of your integrity in a proper frame?

By the time you get popular, will you not be strange to dignity?

By the time you get that visa or fame, will your passport to purity not have been torn?

When you eventually make the money, will your marriage/friendship/relationships still have meaning?

[Daily Tip]Does It Make Sense?

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Sun, 19 Nov 2017 07:39:00 -0800

Three friends had an accident in a car and became unconscious. A stranger got to the scene and wanted to call for help. He had no phone. *There were six mobile phones in the accident car but all had password on them*.
They all died as a result....!

A pregnant lady collapsed at home with her little daughter. The little girl had no idea of what was happening but saw her mother gasping for air. *She picked her mother's phone to call her Daddy but there was a password on the phone*.
She lost her life.....!

Whose fault?

*My advice is this.*
You are too precious than the information you are securing on your phone.

Only put password on your WhatsApp, Text messages, Facebook, files, etc and leave the call side free. You may one day save your life or the life of your loved ones.

*The password on your phone can be your death warrant.*

Think twice.

A message worth spreading.....creating awareness is real HUMANITY than sympathising or emphathising on the situation....
©African stories Team

[Short Story]GENIUS or MENTALLY ILL?

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Sun, 19 Nov 2017 04:01:00 -0800

A story is told about the young Thomas Edison (the great inventor of the light bulb), who came home one day with a paper for his mother. He told her, “My teacher told me to give this paper only to my mother.”

Thomas’ mother read the note and her eyes filled with tears. Thomas asked his mother what the note said, and she read aloud,
“Your son is a genius. This school is too small for him and doesn’t have enough good teachers for training him. Please teach him yourself.”

And that’s exactly what Thomas’ mother did; she home-schooled her child with devotion and dedication.

As the story goes, many years later after Thomas Edison’s mother passed on, and he was now one of the world’s greatest inventors, he found a folded paper among other family items.

He opened the very same paper that had been handed to him to give to his mother and read the following message:
“Your son is mentally ill. We won’t let him come to school anymore.”

At that moment, Edison realised what his mother had done for him so many years ago. He wrote in his diary: “Thomas Alva Edison was an addled child that, by a hero mother, became the genius of the century.”

In the book of Proverbs we learn: The words of the reckless, pierce like sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

Can you imagine what might have happened to Thomas Edison if his mother had read to him the reckless and hurtful words written by his foolish teacher? He might never have invented the light bulb or made his many other contributions to society.

Thank God for the wisdom and wise words of his mother! She created the context in which her son could grow to his full potential.
Also Read:[Article] Deepest
Let’s take this message to heart and resolve to use our words for healing today.

You might be a parent, what do you say to your children?

You might be a teacher, what do you say to your students... especially the ones that are not really performing well presently?

What do you say about your parents, family, boss, subordinate, leader, colleague, follower?

Just as hurtful words can cause uncontrolled damage for life, so can wise words positively affect a person for life.

May the words you use today change a life for the better.

[Article] Deepest

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Sat, 18 Nov 2017 13:28:00 -0800

When I retire to bed every evening ruminating over life, I discovered that:

Sometimes, to succeed in life you need ENEMIES.... Yes!!!
Also Read:Homeless
You need people who will mock you, so that you can run to God.

You need people who will try to intimidate you, so that you can be courageous.

You need people who will say "NO" so that you can learn how to be independent...I mean how to do it yourself.

You need people who will disappoint you so that you can put all your trust in God alone.
Also Read: Homeless
You need people who will work towards you losing that job, so that you can start your own big business.

You need people who will sell your 'JOSEPH' so that 'you' can get to Egypt and be a Prime Minister in a strange land of captivity.

You need a cruel landlord, so that you won't be too comfortable in someone else's house, then you can build your own house on time.

But sometimes, when we are disappointed, we feel very bad and we tend to remain on that spot. Not knowing that the end-point of disappointment is the beginning of your accomplishments.

Understand this, "that every disappointment you once had came with a blessing!" However, it is not everyone that partakes in this blessing that I'm talking about.

You cannot see a new OPEN door while you are still putting all your attention, time and energy in trying to force the closed one to open.

And again I say, "No disappointment can ever come without an attached blessing!"

So, when the disappointment comes, thank God for it and tell "HIM" to open your eyes to see the new blessing that HE has for you!

Disappointment is PHASE1 while accomplishment is PHASE2. I doubt if one can jump the protocols.

That is why it is called BREAKTHROUGH Something must BREAK so that you can go THROUGH!

Encourage someone today....you are lifted.

Please don't thank me for this post but bless others by sharing it.

(Music ads) Pina4 by Blesskid (+3 tracks)

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Sat, 18 Nov 2017 01:53:00 -0800

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Bless kid is back again!!

Blessed is an up coming artist(musician) who has been into music since 2015, He is from Anambara state but grew up at Abuja(madalla).....

.He is a a full student of Federal University of Technology MINNA at Gidan Kwano campus,he is presently in 200 level,he graduated from wisdom international school suleja road and has an SSCE but now in the Uni.

He also have an experience i n computer and derives loves art work(drawing)but loves singing........

He has a certificate for participation in the 3rd Taliban MINNA Inter-School Arts Competition/Exhibition 2014.....

He was sponsored by his loving mum who always make sure he comes out best in all he does ,though he is from an average family,not too rich not too poor ,But in 2015 he started his music carrier and put so many seriousness an mind in it and hope that one day he will make Nigerins proud thereby blowing up the minds of Nigerians with the thoughts of his mindset(rapline)

He loves legendary beats ......He is on line hot hot now with his first song titled BACK AGAIN......BLESSKID lives at newsite madalla along suleja road with great hope that he will be of good help to people close n far from him with his talent.

He Just released a hit song titled PINA 4

With other 3 tracks.

Download Music: Pina 4

LINK 1 / LINK 2

Download Music: Back Again HERE.

Download Music: Body Yo. HERE

Download Music: Jeje. HERE

[Naija Joke]Square Testicles

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 23:46:00 -0800

This is a joke that is supposed to bring you the luck of the Irish.

An elderly woman walked into the Royal Bank of Ireland one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money.

After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the president's office.

The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, '$165,000'.

The president was curious and asked her how she had been able to save so much money . The elderly woman replied that she made bets.

The president was surprised and asked, 'What kind of bets?'

The elderly woman replied, 'Well, I bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square.'

The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that.

The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and said, 'Would you like to take my bet?'

Also Read: THE PREGNANT VIRGIN

'Certainly', replied the president. 'I bet you $25,000 that my testicles are not square.'

'Done', the elderly woman answered. 'But given the amount of money involved, if you don't mind I would like to come back at 10 ' clock tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness.'

'No problem', said the president of the Bank confidently.

That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and again until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet.

The next morning at exactly 10 o'clock the elderly woman arrived at the president's office with her lawyer and acknowledged the $25,000 bet made the day before that the president's testicles were square.

The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before. Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants etc. so that she and her lawyer could see clearly.

The president was happy to oblige.

The elderly woman came closer so she could see better and asked the president if she could touch them. 'Of course', said the president. 'Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% sure.'

The elderly woman did so with a little smile. Suddenly the president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that and she replied, 'Oh, it's probably because I bet him $100,000 that around 10 o'clock this morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Royal Bank of Ireland '

The origin of this Irish story is unknown but it brings luck to everyone to whom it is sent. Whoever breaks the chain would definitely be unlucky.

There is love in sharing!!!

[Article] I AM A WOMAN!!!

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 23:37:00 -0800

WHOEVER WROTE THIS SHOULD BE AWARDED.

So what?

I get into an argument with a man, he slaps me, I feel the pain, yet they tell me I provoked him. I should have been quiet, I should have been patient. I should apologize to him.

I get into an argument with a man, I slap him, they tell me I have no respect, no home training. I should have been quiet, I should have been patient. I should apologize to him.
Because I am a woman, I don't have a right to be angry. So, the degree of my innocence is directly proportional to the degree of my silence in the face of oppression and brutality.....
MUST READ: [Article] THE KISS OF THE MARRIED WOMAN THAT EVENTUALLY SCATTERED MUGABE'S KINGDOM- A LESSON FOR ALL MEN.
Because I am a woman, my husband cheats on me, I am told to tolerate it to save my marriage. The barbaric and stupid excuse is that ''it is in their nature to cheat, I should slim down, dress better, cook better, pray harder and be more pleasant to him"

I cheat, and I am called a whore, I have committed an abomination, I have no right to look elsewhere for the love and emotional support I lack at home, I am an irresponsible mother.

So I am sent packing, from the home we both built, with all my earthly possessions stuffed into a tiny box on my head. I am henceforth forbidden from seeing my two older children, I'm lucky to be allowed to go with my little one still suckling on my left breast. Three years later, the little one is tagged a bastard. Now, my new name is "after-three", because I am a woman.

He is 28 and runs a company. He's tagged wonderful, hardworking, focused, career oriented, successful at a very young age.

I am 28 and I run a company " Hmmmm, she is not even married, unserious, can not order her priorities right, a hustler, loves money, let her go and get a husband oh"

And I wonder if being successful has anything to do with a person's gender.

Because I am a woman,
I am not allowed to have wits or be a prodigy, I cannot be financially buoyant, professionally successful or be treated with respect without a man beside me.

Then I am tagged a generous leg opener, "a runs girl". They never see the possibility that I actually had to go through ups and downs to get to where I am.

Because I am a woman.

A man looses his wife to death and remarries a year after, he did the right thing, he's being praised and congratulated for moving on, after all life is for the living.

A woman looses her husband to death and remarries after 4yrs, "ahhh! so early? Are u sure she wasn't sleeping with that man even when her husband was alive? That was why she killed her husband. She's a witch! " Because she's a woman.

Because I am a woman, this post will be considered controversial, and everyone will try to correct me.

But don't forget, that I am a woman and it does not make me less human!!!

Share to respect some woman.

Author: Ogunbiyi Doyinsola

[Article] THE KISS OF THE MARRIED WOMAN THAT EVENTUALLY SCATTERED MUGABE'S KINGDOM- A LESSON FOR ALL MEN.

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 22:56:00 -0800

Ata Ikiddeh

Now, it's difficult to piece together what is going to become of Zimbabwe after now, however history gives us a peek at the key actors in the drama currently playing out.

Now, this is the story you dont't know.

Mugabe the deposed President of Zimbabwe, Constantine Chiwenga the Head of the Zimbabwean Military and Mnangagwa the sacked Vice President of Zimbabwe are all friends, very good friends, they are comrades. The three men were in their 20's when they entered the bushes and took part in the liberation struggle to free Zimbabwe from white rule. Mugabe who was initially the Sect General of ZANU PF, became the head of state, the other two men were equally given plum positions of power and have continued as the 3 musketeers presiding over the destiny of Zimbabwe for 37 years.

Sometime in the 90's - Mugabe, the first musketeer fell in love with his personal secretary who happened to be another man's wife at the time, the lady's name was Grace and she became his mistress. While Mugabe was still married Grace had children for him. In 1996 they became man and wife after the death of Mugabe's first spouse.

But Grace was no ordinary mistress turned wife, she was not ready to take a backseat, she turned herself into Mugabe's political confidant, she used the bed and made her way to the very centre of Zimbabwean politics straining the relationship between Mugabe and his two comrades.

Mnangagwa the 2nd musketeer after many years of loyalty became Mugabe's Vice President in 2014, paving the way for his eventual hold on power should Mugabe retire, resign or die. But Grace had other ideas she wangled her way into ZANU PF's politburo and began her move to take out Mnangagwa and take power from her ailing husband.

In August 2017 Mnangagwa accused certain persons in the party of trying to poison him and made references to Grace. This didn't go down well with Mugabe, how could anyone accuse his beautiful harmless Rose flower. What Mugabe forgot was that boys are allowed to fight but the brotherhood must stay strong and united. In a move that shocked everyone (but didn't shock his beloved Grace) , he removed Mnangagwa from the position of Vice President, Mnangagwa not sure of what Grace will do to him fled to South Africa.

Now, in comes the 3rd musketeer Chiwenga Head of the Zimbabwaean military, a friend and brother of both Mugabe and Mnangagwa, "this is all the fault of one woman", he is probably thinking in his mind, " we were one until this woman came. I trust Mnangagwa to takeover, I don't know this woman; by the way, where was she when we were sleeping in the bushes before the liberation".

Chiwenga sends a warning to Mugabe advising him to put his house in order, the first time he has ever spoken this way to his senior comrade. Thinking Mugabe will take the signal, call him, negotiate and talk things over a cup of tea. NO! Mugabe does the exact opposite, he sends his Minister of Information to tell the Army General to stay out of State matters, Mugabe then finalises plans to sack Chiwenga. The military chief at this point knows his brother and comrade in arms has drunk deep from the strange woman's bosom, it's not him speaking anymore, so he rolls out his tanks early this morning. He's therefore right when he says,"this is not a coup" ; when you really look at it, 3 friends have only fallen out over the ambitions of a woman.

Latest reportś say Mnangagwa the 2nd Musketeer is on his way back from South Africa, i've just seen a report he's been installed interim President. The 1st Musketter Mugabe is under house arrest. The 3rd Musketter is in the saddle promising calm and quick elections. The 3 men have held Zimbabwe under lock and key for 37yrs, this is nothing but a change of baton. Zimbabwe needs a real revolution out of the hands of the veterans of the liberation struggle. In the 21st century Zimbabwe is the frozen out Animal Farm in George Orwells celebrated work.

Meanwhile the woman Grace, who started the whole katakata, I hear has fled the country leaving her beloved husband who sacrificed everything to face an uncertain fate.

16 million Zimbabweans could not remove Mugabe but a woman did.

Mama was always right when she always told me, "son - be careful who you fall in love with and eventually marry".

A lesson to all men.

[Article]FEW FACTS ABOUT WEALTH

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 10:11:00 -0800

(1.) Your salary will never make you rich. Your boss isn't that foolish.

(2.) Your salary is fixed, are your expenses fixed?

(3.) If your company pays you the exact true value of the services you render, they would be running at a loss. As an employee, you are underpaid.

(4.) Once you get HIRED, you either get FIRED or RETIRED, you may also resign when you're TIRED.

(5.) Salary is the bribe you're given to forget your dreams, family, freedom, self-esteem, academics, social life and other personal goals.

(6.) Your kids won't inherit your post in that company you're employed in. Employment is not hereditary.

(7.) If your salary is not huge enough to pay your bills, leaving you with sufficient amount to save,prepare for poverty after you stop work.

(8.) If you must work,before you eat,if you get paralysed,ill or become aged,hunger will strike you.

(9.) Being an employee is a bit similar to being a slave,you take orders,you are regimented,when will you become a master?.

(10.) In Forbes list of the richest men in the world,show me one employee.

A WORD IS ENOUGH FOR THE WISE

Do you Have a plan B to fall back to..!

©African stories Team

Rob & Rape episode 5 [final Episode]

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 09:53:00 -0800

Read previous episode here

I smiled to myself. It was obvious my plan was working, even though it made them very angry. Suddenly shots were fired well inside our lodge for the first time, almost killing me with shock. It instantly dawned on me that they were very determined to deal with us, perhaps for daring to challenge them. The guns that were fired outside the lodge were now being fired inside.

“God help us” i prayed.

The sound of police siren coming from a distance soon caught my attention. I breathed deeply and thanked God.

“Is that the police?” Jenny asked, peeping out from the toilet.

“I guess so” i replied and hastily headed to the window, smiling in relief as i saw the hoodlums racing out of our lodge.

“they are running away” i informed the girls. They all ran out of the toilet and joined me at the window.

“idiots” Jenny cursed. I closed my eyes and thanked God over and over. Seriously i can’t describe how relieved and happy i was seeing the police arrive that moment. They came at such a crucial point, who knows what could have happened supposing they came an hour late.

“how do we now clean the mess you left outside?” Jenny queried. I stared at her for a while before shrugging.

“i guess we have to leave it there. We can’t do anything about it” i answered, shocking her with my reply.

“Did you hear that?” she said to the girls,

“c’mon you girls owe me a lot for sticking out my head for your safety, So let it be our secret. It’s for our own good, you know the guys could return any day for payback huh” i addressed them convincingly. They all nodded in agreement and our secret it remained till we graduated.

Nobody else knew the story behind the mysterious human waste littered all over the first floor of St. Gabriel Girls hostel after the terrifying robbery. It amused the police even though they all admitted that the horrible objects might have saved the girls living on the first floor. I saw myself as a hero. A super girl, someone who did the unimaginable to save her friends, even though i saved only but few girls.

The horrible tales and cries from the unlucky ones however overshadowed my happiness. Till this day, i still dream about that terrible night.

*THE END.*
©African stories Team

Rob & Rape episode 4

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 05:00:00 -0800

Read previous episode here

I was risking it all, putting my life and body on the line. Sincerely, it wasn’t easy in any way. I forced myself to be courageous in order to pull it out successfully. I soon got to the corridor without any harm. I breathed deeply and opened the bucket. It was time to do the unthinkable.

I slowly emptied half of my load on the first iron protector, which quickly spilled to the stairs, polluting the whole place. A very nauseating experience, i must add. I quickly headed to the second protector and began pouring the rest of the stuff on it.

In the process two guys showed up unexpectedly, on their way to our floor. I had no time to take a proper look at them because they first saw me and screamed furiously, leaving me with no choice than to nervously drop the bucket and run.

I headed to my room totally shaken and scared.

“They saw me. They almost got me” i nervously said to the girls. They all shivered and stared at each other.

Best Advice in Life

“I finally got the police when you left to do your thing. They are on their way, seems like someone else called them before i did. But i guess it’s of no use now, since the idiots saw you and will probably get here before the police arrives” Jenny said sadly.

“the stairs are well littered with the stuff and it’s oozing down there. I don’t think they can get across unless they are very determined” i said to her.

“but they saw your face which could make them very angry and determined my dear. They might see your action as a challenge” she said, sending more fear into me. As i made to say something, male voices instantly hit our ears.

We all froze and listened but couldn’t pick out much of what they were saying. Their voices were coming right through the corridor, which told us that they were definitely close and about clamping down on us.

I rushed to my door and placed my ear on the key hole while the girls in my room ran into the toilet.

“chai you girls are in soup. You dared to keep us away with your smelling s–t abi. With all these diseases una carry dey waka. We dey come” i heard them scream without anyone attempting to break the key used to lock the iron protectors. I realised this, because i heard no sound of clashing metals. I smiled to myself. It was obvious my plan was working, even though it made them very angry.

Suddenly shots were fired well inside our lodge for the first time, almost killing me with shock. It instantly dawned on me that they were very determined to deal with us, perhaps for daring to challenge them. The guns that were fired outside the lodge were now being fired inside.

“God help us” i prayed.

To be continued.

Rob & Rape episode 3

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 04:53:00 -0800

Read Previous episode here

“We pour them on the iron protectors, the rest will spill on the steps” i explained.

“heyyyyyy!” they all gasped.

“That’s totally insane” Jenny cried,

“insane measures are what we need in order to avoid being humiliated” i defended.

“but we can’t be taking such a decision without the support of others. We are not the only girls living on this floor. Don’t you think we will be putting them more at risk?. What if the plan backfires and the idiots gets their way inside?” jenny questioned fearfully.

“calm down my dear, we are already in danger. We have nothing to lose trying” i answered.

“after messing up the protectors, who will clean them in the morning?” she asked,

“see question. Abeg if you are scared just return to your room” i said with anger, stood up and went to my toilet where i fetched a small bucket.

“we have no time. If you are with me, just come forward and make use of this bucket” i said with a commanding tone. None of the girls made any move. It was obvious my idea was sickening to them.

“very well. I guess i’m on my own in this. Alright let’s wait and get robbed. I have nothing to lose, after all i’m the least pretty here. I doubt if the guys would fancy me” i said with resignation. They all stared at each other with more fear. A girl stood up.

“i’m in, let me have the bucket” she said.

Five minutes later, the small bucket was half filled with human waste. The girls looked at me waiting for the next stage of my plan. I opened my door and looked around.
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“the corridor is still free and safe. It’s time to make use of the little time we have left” i smiled to them, carried the smelling bucket and headed out of my room. I acted as if i was very brave but unknown to them i was almost dead with fright.

Slowly i cautiously carried the bucket of human waste to the corridor. My heart throbbing wildly and shaking my entire body. I was risking it all, putting my life and body on the line. Sincerely, it wasn’t easy in any way. I forced myself to be courageous in order to pull it out successfully. I soon got to the corridor without any harm. I breathed deeply and opened the bucket. It was time to do the unthinkable.

To be continued.

Rob & Rape episode 2

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 04:03:00 -0800

Read previous episode here

“what do we do?, we can’t just sit and wait for them to come rob and rape us?” Jenny cried with despair, while the other girls nodded in agreement, looking up to me for a solution, but unfortunately i was the most scared….. I was forced to play down my fears and think like a leader…

More cries soon filled the air, sending more fear into us. We shook and stared at each other, too scared to say anything. I rushed to my window and peeped out again. “my God” i gasped as my eyes fell on more men who were freeing trooping into the hostel. The gate was now flung open like that of a night club.. It was just as if all members of a particular cult group were paying us a midnight visit. It really looked as if they came for another thing, not merely to rob us.

“please leave me”

“kill me”

“i beg of you don’t touch me” were the cries coming up from downstairs likewise the sound of doors being broken. We calmly waited for our turn even though i was extremely surprised that the hoodlums were yet to come up to the first floor. We were yet to hear any noise from our section of the lodge.

“quickly call the police Jenny. I hope you have the security numbers the caretaker dropped earlier in the year?” i said to Jenny who quickly nodded.

“i have been dialing the numbers for the past ten minutes but nobody is answering” she replied nervously.

“they are definitely messing up the girls downstairs. They are taking their time with them, that’s the reason they are yet to come up. Isn’t this a one storey hostel with just thirty five rooms? And the time is still 1:15am” one of the girls in my room sobbed.

“we have to prevent them from coming up” i finally concluded,

“what?” they all asked curiously.

“they didn’t kill the lights {electricity} we can use it to our advantage” i revealed,

“yea because they are probably wearing masks” Jenny argued.

“first i have to take a look at the corridor. If the protectors are firmly locked as they should be, then we have a chance” i addressed the girls,

“I still don’t get you?” another girl spoke out,

“we have to prevent them from getting to the two protectors guiding our floor by messing up the protectors” i answered.

“with what exactly?” Jenny asked,

“with faeces and urine of course” i answered with a nervous smile.

“We pour them on the iron protectors, the rest will spill on the steps” i explained.

“heyyyyyy!” they all gasped.

To be continued.

Rob & Rape episode 1

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Fri, 17 Nov 2017 02:42:00 -0800

TIME: 1:00AM, APRIL 16 2008 ST. GABRIEL GIRLS HOSTEL .

Somto’s Story…. The sharp sound of gunshots woke me with a terrible jolt. I sprang up confused and nervous. Kpooaaaaaaa Another gunshot went off outside my window, sending me tumbling on the floor. I laid down quietly for some seconds before getting up to peep through the window. What i saw unsettled me tremendously. I saw about a dozen men standing well inside our hostel, near the gate, whispering among themselves.

About five others stood outside the hostel keeping watch. They equally were the ones firing the gunshots, because just as i looked out of the window, one of them fire another shot. I was extremely scared and lost on what to do.

I remembered the horrible tales my course mate Ujunwa told me some weeks back, when her hostel was attacked. The hostel equally was an all girls hostel just like mine and remembering the agony on her face as she told me how she was defiled, ripped my heart apart. I felt like crying. I felt like throwing up. Just that moment i heard a gentle taps on my door which quickly sent my nerves flying high.

“big mama, it’s me Jenny, please open up” a female voice begged. I quickly opened my door and was surprised to see five of my neighbours who were living in the same floor with me standing and shaking with fear. They quickly rushed into my room while i shut the door instantly.

“our hostel is being attacked. We are being robbed. They are downstairs” Jenny said with fright

Being older than most of my neighbours, plus my huge body size. I was highly respected and called Big Mama by all the girls, which kind of made me the defacto head girl of the lodge. My hostel being an all girls hostel used to be an easy target for cultists and armed robbers according to the stories i heard from older students who graduated the period i moved in. The hostel management then had to improve security by raising up the walls and upgrading the barbed wires on them.

Iron protectors were equally installed on all corridors and entrances leading to each floor. The security measures made the lodge very safe that for two years after i moved in, nobody disturbed us until that fateful night. Looking at the hoodlums, there wasn’t any doubt they came heavily prepared with enough manpower to subdue us…

The sound of cries from downstairs soon hit our ears, notifying us that the mischief-makers were now fully in control of the building.

“what do we do?, we can’t just sit and wait for them to come rob and rape us?” Jenny cried with despair, while the other girls nodded in agreement, looking up to me for a solution, but unfortunately i was the most scared….. I was forced to play down my fears and think like a leader…

To be continued shortly

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Thu, 16 Nov 2017 04:41:00 -0800

[Article]LAW OF LIFE

Adekazofficial@gmail.com (Official Adekaz ) — Wed, 15 Nov 2017 22:03:00 -0800

When a newspaper reporter interviewed a farmer who grew Award-Winning Maize each year he entered his maize in the Agricultural Show, it was revealed that the farmer shared his seed with his neighbours.
Perplexed, the reporter asked, “How can you afford to share your best seed with your neighbours when they are entering their maize in competition with yours each year?”

The farmer smiled knowingly and explained, *“The wind picks up pollen from the ripening maize and swirls it from field to field.* If my neighbours grow inferior maize, Cross-Pollination will steadily degrade the quality of my maize.
If I am to grow good maize, I must help my neighbours grow a good crop.
*”So it is with our lives. Those who want to live meaningfully and well, must help enrich the lives of others.*
For the value of a life, is measured by the lives it touches. *And those who choose to be happy, must help others find happiness.*
For the welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all.
Call it power of collectivity.
Call it a principle of success. Call it a law of life.
The fact remains, “None of us truly wins, until we all win.”
Also Read:ADVOCATE FOR A HAPPY MARRIAGE.
Love your neighbour as yourself.
Know this secret as you grow older!
*In life, when you help the people around you to be good, you surely become the best.*