Marianne Goldweber

My Symphony

2012-01-09T08:00:00.000-08:00

My Symphony

In the silence, I have discovered a sound.
I call it My Note.
One single note that resonates within me.
Emanates from me.
I play my personal sound throughout my days,
and the resonance of that sound has attracted other vibrations.
Some in perfect chord and harmony with my own.
and yet,
there have been those that are sharp
and some flat
But....
When I stop to reflect
upon all of the notes I've met
and play them in succession and unison
it has revealed a great work
which is, the Symphony that is my Life.
Marianne Goldweber

Conscious giving this Holiday season

2011-11-14T09:02:00.001-08:00

As we embark into the holiday season-please, rethink what we are purchasing as gifts. Please, support local owned businesses and artists. Try to avoid companies that outsource jobs, or import foreign goods and materials.

Help your children make their gifts for family and friends- or even make them yourself. Or make a family agreement to purchase personal care and household items for those in need at this time of year. Donate your time as a family to a shelter or elder care facility.Donate toys for children who would love and cherish your gift.

Together we can make this a kinder and more meaningful holiday season, and who knows- you make get the holiday bug all year long...:)

If you need ideas or sources- just send me an email!-
Remember- It takes A Village- Marianne Goldweber
A Village- Development Center, Cleveland ohio
216.324.2657
Mariannegoldweber@yahoo.com

Getting serious about Serving.. Join us!

2011-11-05T14:17:00.000-07:00

When I realized that I was about to embark on this Spiritual journey, I knew that once I went through that door, there was no turning back. I would be forever changed. There was no going back to my illusionary, problematic life- where I was whining and resistant to seeing anyones suffering but my own.

A Spiritual life is selfless- not in that you don't care for your own needs, but in a way that if my needs aren't met- I cannot fully Serve the needs of humanity.

Part of our Village philosphy is about Selfless serving and compassionate giving.
What the hell is that, you ask?
Well, Selfless Serving is unconditional, without condition- without being thanked, rewarded or acknowledged for our contribution.
Compassionate giving is to everyone, even those that some feel are not deserving- the addict- the imprisoned- the greedy- the demanding. the ungrateful. Because you see- it is not in what is given- it is given with compassion- the energy attached is not about the recipient, it is about the giver.

I began this journey serving women in transitional housing, and then contributed through the homeless shelters and then through other non profit outreach facilities- like the Salvation Army.

I didn't know (at that time) the impoverished commutity firsthand, so I alligned myself with those who work directly with those in need.
Since that time- I have advocated, raised awareness, collected non cash donations, solicited non cash donations from businesses and supported individuals, families and agencies that make a difference directly.

There are risks too-
There are liars, criminals, and deviant behaviors. There is pedophilia, rape and rap sheets. There is only a basic survival instinct to take- some are rude and ungrateful- somehow created by our separateness as a society and lack of Love.
and ...you may fall in love...with mankind- even if they haven't bathed- or are mentally ill- or elderly and alone..their eyes tell a story, and their stories are amazing. They connect to your god light and you will become the weeping Buddha- for someone created their suffering and their suffering is palpable.
It can overwhelm and consume you.

Then there are the children-who never got to believe in Santa- because it is an illusion that parents can't fill. Like flowers in the sidewalk crack- they grow and thrive in spite of their living conditions, they laugh and play and wish wishes and dream dreams. Some, who's reality is your worst nightmare.

And we choose to Serve, even at great personal risk of insignificance.

Beginning this year- our Collective effort as a personal and spiritual development center is to commit to making a difference in our communities. Last year- we served over 100 individuals and falmilies with every day products, food and clothes, advocacy and spiritual support. This year, our goal is over 500 individuals and families that we can make a difference to. Sound like a tall order? Not really. Here is what we can do;

If every person on my facebook friends list contributed the following- Today, that would be 778 people. If those shared it with 1 friend- that number would double. So 500 seems relatively easy!
If you can give 1 thing. on the list.
Also, it doesn;t matter where you live- there are shelters and agencies in your area that need the support.

Here is what each person can contribute;
1 tube toothpaste
1 toothbrush
1 pack of mens socks
1 washcloth
1 towel
1 lotion
1 shampoo
1 laundry soap
2 paper towels
1 large toilet paper
1 pack light bulbs
laundry detergent
cleaner
hydrogen peroxide
bandaids
feminine products
hairbrush
mens under wear(new)

Now....there are other items that are in desperate need- new or used and CLEAN
mens clothing (all kinds)
Boots (men women and children)
Shoes (mens women and children)
Coats (mens women and children)
hats, scarves and gloves (mens women and children)
long under wear
Blankets and throws- new or used and CLEAN please. (no comforters -they are too hard to wash)

Care Alliance-Will take old prescription meds to redistribute to the sick homeless by doctors.There are a number of their health care facilities in Cleveland.

Health Care Alliance (216) 781-3414 2227 Payne Ave, Cleveland, OH Get Directions

Thank you for being part of my Village, and together- we can make a difference in our changing world.
Peace and Love
Marianne Goldweber
216.324.2657
Mariannegoldweber@yahoo.com
www.avillagecleveland.com

Maneuvering Life's Highway

2011-09-25T12:53:00.000-07:00

There are always going to be people and things that cut you off on the highway of life.. but how you maneuver and respond makes all the difference...- Marianne Goldweber

This quote was inspired by a car adccident the other day. I was driving along- listening to the radio, the sun was out when all of the sudden- I saw an accident about to happen. I check the rear, tried to maneuver around it, but one of the drivers cut in front of me and I when I tried to maneuver away we collided anyway.

After the initial shock and aftermath I had some quiet tome to reflect on that situation and how it pertains to Life.

Many times, we see the situation coming- but we can only prepare so much and there are going to be times that no matter how much we prepare- things are not up to us. There are others involved and we can never anticipate how they are going to respond in the same situation. The outcome is now out of our control and we are left with the impact and the cleanup.

Had I not been careful and alert; armed with many years of driving and past experiences- this could have been much worse. So the lesson here is; You can only be adequately prepared for the unknown- how everyone will respond in life's situations will affect us- but there is great purpose and learning in each and every one for us and everyone else. :)

The Path

2011-08-12T16:23:00.000-07:00

crawling
rising
stepping
unsteady
falling
crying
rising
angry
determined
panting
puffing
climbing
slipping
defeated
bruised
broken
resolute
resilient
excited
careful
curious
strong
courageous
grateful
methodical
pondering
believing
purposeful
aware
conscious
liberated
grateful
jubilant

Marianne Goldweber

Spiritual accountability- the key to freedom

2011-07-27T21:16:00.000-07:00

We are groomed from birth to feel pain, pleasure, disappointment, success, guilt, and a myriad of emotions. However- as psychic spiritual beings- we are not taught how to separate the feelings or emotion of others from our own.

For most of us, culture and spirituality are very separate. Unlike most indigenous cultures, where the relationship from Creator to man is not separate; that they co-exist with the Divine. This teaching includes a great responsibility to themselves, the children and communities to stay on the Good Red Road; to serve selflessly and care for their brothers and sisters be they human, animal, plant or stone.

Lives of honor, truth and accountability to defend our planet- our Mother. Their thoughts and actions leading the way. Remembering that any negative experience that they have, has been created for growth- not as a punishment, but as an event to gather knowledge and use to evolve to a place of wisdom. Through those teaching, they become the wizened example of a committed life.

Now, in our western culture there are few leaders, that we hear of regularly, who can fit into that category. The leaders that we hold above and emulate are famous; however, not for the most honorable reasons. They are entertainers, or politicians, or recognizable because they are willing to put their dysfunctional lives on public display for money. Material wealth- not character, gives them a higher status of respect and reverence.

This is a culture of blame- not ownership. It's always someones fault for the suffering.- the victimization that permeates this negative culture. So instead of becoming a leader- we seek out diversions to escape a painful, uninspired existence. We numb ourselves with anything that will take us away from the truth of our lives for a while. We use alcohol, drugs, antidepressants and other pharmaceuticals, shopping, technology, television and video games.

In order to keep the illusion going, we must work grueling jobs we hate, for people who remind us that we are expendable. Just so we can buy more stuff, or pay for the stuff we bought- while our children are in day cares with strangers.

Where are the Heroes, the Elders, the Wise ones?

We are the future- what we feel in our depression is the pain of our changing world. The chaos and drama of others. Until we clear our own life and home, and create peace- we will not be able to understand and defend ourselves against the assault of negativity that surrounds us.

We must first decompress- and assess where we are, what we want and what is truly important in our lives. To (possibly for the first time) look at who we are authentically, not who we have been told to be. We must stop and gather our thoughts and take a clear look at what we have created while we were diverted- or asleep. It is in that stillness that the Divine speaks. The loving, higher knowing, reminds us of the better way.

As we awaken- and make changes, it becomes easier to know what makes us feel good, loved and peaceful. We can then come to see the source of what does not. It's then, that we can choose to create purpose filled lives, and begin to set boundaries to the fear and unhappiness of others.

You are the hero, you are the one you've been waiting for. :)

Be the change you wish to see- and you will find that the world is not as bad as it seems. There is Hope, Love and Joy. You will meet others, just like you that had the courage to lead.
Then the ripple will be created.

Independence Day

2011-07-03T13:29:00.000-07:00

I woke up today, thinking about Independence and Patriotism. they are both interesting words, meaning;

Independence-freedom from the control, influence, support and aid of others.

Patriot-a person who loves, supports, and defends his or her country and its interests with devotion.

a person who regards himself or herself as a defender, especially of individual rights, against presumed interference by the federal government.

I was reflecting on how the United States wanted their independence from England- that they wanted the freedom to self govern. I was thinking about all the people who saw this country as a place where they could be free to think for themselves, to make money by creating their own business, to take care of their families, to believe what they wanted and to escape from persecution.

Some of our inhabitants were not here willingly, but enslaved and eventually earned their freedom. I think about the Native peoples of this country, and every country- the First Peoples- our Native American brothers, who have had to relinquish their freedom in order for us to have ours; who still suffer today.

I thought about the courage and challenge and effort it took to be Self Governing, and to stand in that truth amidst the criticism of the naysayers, critics and large powers who sabotaged that fight for Freedom at every turn.

I see the result of that Dream of our ancestors, and ask- would they be proud of what we've become?

I saw a commentary by Tony Blair on what makes America great- and I have to say that it inspired me as a Patriot. I don't always agree with our politics, or the decisions our government makes- but I do believe that by having the Freedom to not agree; I am blessed to live in a place that allows me to do that.

It is through the hard work- determination of every immigrant that made this country what is is and through the kindness and tolerance of our Native peoples, that I have these freedoms today.

I am inspired to see tomorrow as my own Independence day- to be free from the tyranny of the greatest enemy- myself and seek to be self governing- disciplined and raise my flag in truth, integrity and faith.

I will strive to be courageous and blaze my own trail .

I will seek to be independent and pull my own load.

I will not burden another with my lack of accountability.

I will defend that independence and be a beacon of it in this world.

I will be an expression of my Faith.

I am proud to be an American and a Patriot- and Our United States, like any family it has it's quirky bits- but we love each other and will do whatever it takes to defend it and keep it together.

That is what makes us great. :)

Guides- a parable

2011-06-24T08:27:00.000-07:00

Two spirit guides are on the other side having coffee....

Cleo- "Hey Bob, how's it going?"

Bob- "Pretty good, had a rough week with my assignment"

Cleo- "Amen brother- there's a lot going on down there now."

Bob- "There is so much chatter and interference that she can't hear me. Although, most of the chatter is that damn critical voice of hers. She's constantly on that computer, and don't even get me started on that cell phone. She keeps saying the same things over and over. 'I need guidance, I need help, send me more money.'
I sent her money last month and instead of paying her bills, she bought something called a cafe late' and a video game system for the kids' I really hate to watch her struggle. I even sent a messenger as a little old lady in the grocery store, but she passed her by. "

Cleo-" No one said this job was going to be easy. They don't get enough sleep, so I can't even get the team together for Dream time messages. The challenge Bob, is that they never learned how to look for the signs we send. My assignment was looking for a sign about the relationship she was in and I posted a sign on the back of the truck in front of her at a traffic light that said 'You deserve the best' but she thought it was funny and brushed it off as a coincidence."
Bob- "It's hard being invisible. Can you pass me a doughnut?"

Rain

2011-06-21T07:44:00.000-07:00

Rain

Anxious feelings stir
as the rain approaches.
Not because of the storm-
but the drought within me.

My Soul thirsts--
cracked and parched
as the Painted Desert.

In the distance
the Thunder gently rolls
announcing the arrival of
the Thunder beings
bringing the much needed rain.;
the nourishment and cleaning I need.

Like the parched grass- I wait.
The fist drops kiss my skin;
Then another
and
another

Relief.

In the rumble of the thunder
I hear the Sacred Voice as it whispers-
‘Drink, let me quench your thirst Daughter
and wash away the dust that clouds your Vision.’

To the Great Sky Nation
I raise my face.
The rain washes me gently.
As it mingles with my tears,
it refreshes my Soul.

Marianne Goldweber

Walking the Good Red Road in Faith

2011-05-07T10:19:00.000-07:00

I know that until any of us take the 'final trip ' the truth about belief and faith is just a speculation. None of us knows first hand the mysteries that the Universe holds.

There are many spiritual paths to adopt and allign with that describe our personal 'Belief' and whatever our connection is to the Divine- and that choice is personal.

Our need to criticize, judge and admonish the 'belief' of others seems inaccurate- for there is no 'truth' except for the personal truths that we each hold and express through Living our Faith.

Our lives are the example of the path that we follow- there should be no need to 'convince' another of the rightness of what we believe. If we are living examples of what faith brings to our life- then my Life is my Testimony- there is no need for words to explain my spiritual choosing.
I remember as a child, there was a song that we used to sing in school- it was called- They will know we are Christians by our Love. I would observe others and see if I could 'see' who the Christians were. I tried to see if you could really know if someone was a follower of Christ just though their actions- as an expression of Christ's love. Walking examples of the teachings of Christ.

If I was to sing this song now- as a woman of faith I would sing it "They will know I'm a _________ by my love."...... Am I? I try to be, and hold MYSELF to that observation. When people meet me- am I a walking example of my Faith? That is my question.

When I leave this journey- I want to go to the Source of all there is with clean hands and a glad heart- and none of the other things will matter. My impression on those I have met and leave behind, is my testimony.

Just pondering today..... :)
Marianne

Let us pray to the One who holds us
in the hollow of His hands,
To the One who holds us in the curve of Her arms,
To the One whose flesh is the flesh of hills and
hummingbirds and angleworms,
Whose skin is the color of an old Black woman
and a young white man; and the color of the leopard
and the grizzly bear and the green grass snake,
Whose hair is like the aurora borealis, rainbows,
nebulae, waterfalls, and a spider's web,
Whose eyes sometime shine like the Evening Star,
and then like fireflies, and then again like an open wound,
Whose touch is both the touch of life and the touch of death,
And whose name is everyone's, but mostly mine.
And what shall we pray?
Let us say, 'thank you.'

Reprinted with the author's kind permission. Reverend Max Coots is the Minister Emeritus of the Unitarian Universalist Church in Canton, New York. © Max Coots.

Love is all we have....

2011-02-14T06:49:00.000-08:00

Earlier in life I allowed the painful experiences to make me seperate from others. I felt that people just wanted to hurt and take, and didn't really give a damn. I sadly spent much of that time taking, to prevent being taken, and withheld my love to punish. In spite of that, I had many people during that time who loved me anyway. I can't ever thank them all or enough.

Once my perception shifted, I realized that Love can't be contained. It is a free flowing stream from the deepest part of ourselves to another. I have allowed myself to be swept away by this divine flow.
I honestly can't look at another human being without feeling that love connection. It's the only thing I have that I can freely give. I will never run out of it if I stay connected to that place.

It seems that that Love takes risk, but if it is unconditional, there is no risk.

Occasionally I feel like the little boy throwing the beached starfish back into the water. Millions of them at risk of dying in the sun. The sheer magnitude of this mission can be overwhelming, but knowing that just a little love will revive the light in another soul- one person at a time, makes it do-able.

Every human thirsts for love- demonstrated in their need for attention, value, kindness, compassion, and worth. What I can do is be present, and notice another who feels invisible or without identity or hurting. I can remind them that they are a perfect expression of the Divine- and no matter who took that from them, they are Loved.

I love you.
Happy Valentines day
Marianne

Psychicness- there is no instruction manual.

2011-02-13T07:31:00.000-08:00

So the day came where my life was unmanageable.
I was obsessively controlling, and my life was slowly eroding into a nine car pileup. My husband could do nothing right at this point and when he made an appointment to go to marriage counseling I figured if it would make him better, I'm all for it...lol

So I sat in the counselors office and he listened to me vent about (and blame) everyone and everything for the state of my life. He said 'why are you trying so hard Marianne'...and I replied 'becasue if I didn't it would fall apart' He then said 'If you have to try that hard it IS apart...stop trying.' Then he said, 'You are co- dependent.' I was like, what the F*%$# is that? He handed me the book Co-dependent no more and said 'Don't come back till you've read it.'
I read it, and never went back.
Not because the book changed my life, but because there was nothing wrong with me- it was my husband and my boss and my family and strangers I encountered- but certainly not me...lol

This was the beginning of the spiral to the bottom...
So you ask,'what does this have to do with being psychic?

Well, I just 'knew' what people needed- even if they didn't. I was constantly interfering with my unsolicited opinion- I helped and helped and ran people over with my helping- I was faster- smarter- and more knowledgeable that anyone else and felt COMPELLED to help those too ignorant (judgment) to help themselves.Everyone was stupid (another judgment) and I had their answers. (REALLY??...lol)
I am almost embarrassed to admit this - but I have many times confessed this- in order to forgive myself and ask for forgiveness from others.

I was using my psychic 'knowing' to butt in and evesdrop on unsuspecting people so I could 'help them'...( yup...) Even though, back in my own back yard there was a horrific disaster I could not face that was my life. I was not emotionally attached to their drama- but I was to my own- fixing them was 'less painful.'

It was during this time that my spiritual awakening was slowly occurring-people from every spiritual path were appearing day after day with a message. My awareness and need to understand my psychic abilities was becoming stronger..

I am compelled to share this story this morning because there is a great spiritual awakening occurring in our world-but it is painful as the ILLUSION we have created dies.

There is a much faster way to it if we can just shift our perception.
My spiritual Teacher Dave awakened me to this spiritual knowing and I was forced into changing by this amazing shift in perspective. (click here for the teaching)

Dave was not afraid to stand up to me, in his gentle Native American way- and blindsided me with his Spiritual wisdom. I am forever indebted to him. I was using my Psychic connection on everyone but myself. In fact- I could not see myself or (my behavior) or my relationship to the world at all.

There have been many scientific studies that suggest psychic ability is born from childhood trauma. Some say that it is a learned behavior (entering a trance-like state of separation from the physical stressful, abusive events) and a heightened ability to notice when the triggers for these events are going to occur. In psychics studied, something like 75 percent have reported childhood trauma.

I have found in this work that most addicts, physical and otherwise, are flaming psychics, untrained.
This is so they can use the healing of their trauma and psychicness to heal our changing and emerging world. It can make them great and powerful teachers.

This is the stuff that fascinates me about this skill I have developed and use to help empower others to heal themselves.

So if life is a train wreck, and you are addicted to noticing the suffering of others and you are avoiding looking at your own life because it seems too big to fix- there is hope- there is help- there is understanding there is a spiritual solution. Through this process you can harness this ability, get in touch with the guides and universal knowing and emerge as a great teacher....
Then we can then really FIX the world....by fixing our world ;)
Peace beyond all Understanding,
Marianne

It takes A Village- find your Tribe!
To Join our village go to www.avillagecleveland.com
or connect with Our fan page on Facebook Click here
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Mitakuye Oyasin- A Lakota prayer

2011-02-02T10:17:00.000-08:00

The first 35 years of my life was very complicated. It was chaos and drama and pain and suffering.
I felt very victimized and separate from everyone and everything- including the Divine.

I was unable to ease my suffering except through 'diversions' that just took my mind away from it for a little while. Just going day by day - year by year- in a constant state of existing.
This became normal.

I didn't even realize that I was suffering. That realization came once I began evolving.....awakening to another way... because the old tricks weren't working and the 'diversions' didn't stop me from feeling or stopping the bad things from happening.

Then it shifted, things were happening and I couldn't control them, or ignore them. There were so many things I was not in control of anymore.

The Divine began uncomplicating my life- I was not grateful, I was very angry that things were changing. Even though it was painful- the unknown without it was scary.
'The awakening' was not in one day, it was an ebb and flow of understanding and evolution.
Then I began uncomplicating my life...because with every awareness, there was a sense of Peace.

It was slowly removing or forcing me to look at the painful things that I created.
I created? Yes, I chose this life for all of these challenges- and then came here and created even more...(what was I thinking....lol)

So, now you ask 'How do I do that?'

Well, first understanding that we complicate our lives, and are addicted to the chaos, like a junkie needs a fix...peace is boring, kindness is boring, simplicity is boring- while your life is 'complicated'.

At the end- my life took a dramatic turn where it became so complicated that I ran away.
I gave up and hid...for a year and I had to face the Truth.

During that downward spiral to stopping, I learned and heard many spiritual things and met many many spiritual teachers from every path. I didn'd realize that I was filing away their wisdom, unable to apply it, or understand it at that time- but during my year of nothingness, each insight came back to me at the right time- in the right moment.

During this time my birth religion failed me. It was too complicated, there were too many rules and none of it made sense. It didn't make me feel better- it made me feel worse and undeserving. It told me that God was punishing me.

I was drawn to the Native peoples religon. It was more than a religion- it was a way of life. It told me that The Great Mystery loves me enough to allow me to experience at my choosing.
I am CHOOSING it.
I can change what I choose.
There are messengers giving me the answers-
If I learn to stop and observe the message all around me.
It taught me to Living simply, and seeing myself as the Co-Creator of my existence will bring Peace;
Connected to everyone and everything;
and through my example, I would be a mirror of hope and great change.
That I am accountable to the welfare of my brother.

I learned a prayer during that time.
I could not fully understand it until the last few years.
A two word prayer.
Mitakuye Oyasin- All My Relations

It is a prayer for all my Relatives-
and now that I saw that everyone was my Brother, Sister, Cousins, Grandparents,Teachers and my Father and Mother- it became increasingly difficult to be irresponsible, or sad, or unaccountable.

My existence affected 'All my Relations.'
It Demanded more from me- to Love, to laugh, to celebrate to bring hope, to rise, to fight, to champion, to bring peace.
What experience did I give My Relations in my ignorance?
What experience do I want them to have when they encounter me?
Am I looking out for them while they are too weak to defend themselves?
How am I serving my Village?
Am I only taking and never giving back.
Am I hoeing my own row and then the row of another?
What legacy am I leaving the children- for the next seven generations?

So in this dark time of winter-
In the Grandmother Talks with Relations
my message to you who are reading this is;
You are choosing your suffering.
We have all suffered.
There is hope.
There is help
We are all connected in this great brotherhood.
You have a Village- send up a smoke signal.
Find Your Tribe.

Mitakuye Oyasi

Marianne Goldweber

Guardian of Winter- Tatanka

2011-01-19T09:41:00.000-08:00

Guardian of Winter- Tatanka

As I gaze across the frozen field,
in the whirl of the snow,
I begin to see the steaming breath.
Stepping forward through the wind
and flying frozen crystals He appears
with great majesty.

As if forming out of the air itself
the messenger arrives
white as the snow
massive head shaking,
it's gaze settling upon me.
Buffalo- guardian of the North.
Tatanka

So it is with visions,
so clear, it defies understanding
with human words.
It's voice is the wind-
it whispers and shouts.

"Do not forget that abundance is found
when you trust and forage.
It will require effort" he said.

"Trouble yourself no more in traveling backward-
there is nothing left in the past,
for all you need will be given to you in the future.

Wrap yourself in my coat- feel the depth of it's warmth.
I am slow- but my hooves make great thunder when I must run.

I am the very beating of your heart.
Trust the knowing others cannot feel.
I am with you always......"

And in a great wind that came from the North,
through the trees and in the swirling snow he faded
away, back to the land of the ancestors....

Marianne Goldweber

Joy....

2011-01-05T05:37:00.000-08:00

Joy
the feel of satin on my skin
sun on my face
my child neslted sleeping against my chest
the smell of grass after rain
unbridled laughter
leaves blowing
elderly couples walking hand in hand
squirrels chasing
a job well done
getting into bed with clean sheets
random kindness to strangers
silence
peace of mind

Marianne Goldweber

I believe.........

2011-01-04T09:54:00.000-08:00

There is sacredness in this journey,

the number of it's days are the ultimate secret,
as well as the pleasure and pain of the future
and since this is one of the Great Mysteries to which there is no answer,
I believe

My faith allows me to surrender the need to know-
to embrace each day as a gift,
and although I may not understand the great purpose
in the trials and hardships of this human existance
I believe....

I get angry at injustice, or in a young life cut short,
hate and revenge and the unkindness of the world.
I know that it is part of the Divine Plan that I may never understand yet
I believe

There are days and times where it does not make sense,
I wince from the suffering and grief and death and tragedy.
Anger and sadness inside me churns and swells,
assaulting the shores of my soul like a great storm.
I scream- from my most human core
Why- how can this be?
and small voice within whispers the answer....
Believe

Marianne Goldweber

Wisdom of Life- The greatest teaching

2010-12-29T07:44:00.000-08:00

I learned tolerance when I was reminded,
that in my darkest hour-
someone was tolerant of me.

I learned compassion when I was reminded,
that in my darkest hour-
someone was compassionate toward me.

I learned forgiveness when I was reminded,
that in my darkest hour-
someone forgave me.

I learned Love when I was reminded,
that in my darkest hour-
Someone Loved me.

Marianne Goldweber

Giving Thanks

2010-11-24T08:57:00.000-08:00

Giving Thanks
Creator of all there is
who's beauty surrounds me-
thank you

I am grateful
for the innumerable opportunities you have presented to me
through your grace.
Thank you for the faith to accept those opportunites and serve with joy.

I am grateful for the amazing souls that have joined me on this journey-
those who have been called to serve and those who come in need.
I am grateful for their kindness, patience and trust.

I am grateful for those who know me best-
my guides and ancestors-
who's love and understanding guide me through the darkness and light
in my human journey.

I am grateful for my human family-
the source through which I became.
My parents, siblings neices and nephews,
who remind me of my past and support me in the present.
Reminding me of my roots, where I came from
and who helped make me the person I am.

I am grateful for my son- the living arrow that I will send into the the future,
who's unconditional love has Taught me compassion, trust and love
He has taught me to grow and mature.

For these and so many other things I am grateful.
Amen

If the world was blind for a time.....

2010-10-25T06:36:00.000-07:00

If the world was blind for a time,
Would our blindness remove the judgment
by which we assess each other?

Would it level the field?
or would beauty then be judged
by the sound of our voice
or the feel of our skin,
or the smell of our essence?

Would we allow our other senses to
feel another person's energy,
or listen harder to their truth?

Would our blindness make us afraid?
Or would we learn to develop trust?

If the world was blind for a time,
would we finally be able to see
the light and darkness
within ourselves?

Would we develop faith in the unseen-
something greater than us,
and our own inner knowing?

Would we learn to appreciate
the simplicity of life?

Would we learn to help each other?

Would we love our neighbor?

Would we learn to feel with our hands and hearts?

Oh, if only the world was blind for a time......

Marianne Goldweber

Rules of the road- Memoirs of a biker chick..

2010-10-07T06:44:00.000-07:00

During the course of my life I have not always done things in the conventional way.
As a teenager- I yearned for freedom..away from the rules. I was a dreamer, preferring to see things my way, and felt that my creative thinking and my freedom was being suppressed. I was told over and over that I was different, and I refused to conform.
In the late 70's, I was introduced to the biker world. I thought, I found my people, they were my tribe. They were mysterious,free, powerful, intimidating, cool- oh and irreverent.

Over those 20 or so years I gained much wisdom that I use every day..

I like to call them 'The rules of the road...'

People all want to be seen, heard, appreciated and hugged..even A 6'9" guy who's first name started with Crazy....

The battles we fight- inside or out leave scars that we want to show and tell with others.

If you start a fight- don't expect people to jump in and save your ass.

Everybody secretly wants to be you- rebel, wear leather, quit their job, buy a harley and hit the road.

A thick skin, like leather, protects you from stuff that comes at you at 70 mph..or when you fall down.

Learn to laugh at yourself- we all do stupid shit that people will continue to remind you about..
You may even get a nickname because of it.

Just because you buy a leather, a motorcycle and microphone helmets doesn't make you a biker- it makes you a wannabe- be yourself.

F.T.W.- if you have to ask you wouldn't understand.

There is no destination- just a series of experiences on a one way trip.

'Live to Ride' is more than a slogan.

What you see and hear you keep to yourself.

Keep yourself in check.

You are known by the company you keep.

Friendly does not mean friend.

There is power in numbers.

We all have to watch out for each other- if they are on the road with you, you stick with them, you don't bail when they break down.

Your recklessness affects others and if it does- they are going to be pissed.

Stand for what you believe, and protect the innocent.

So, on the road of life, we are all on our way to somewhere- don't forget to stop and have a cold one, everyone has a story especially the old timers-take time to listen, take the road less traveled, don't be afraid to get lost, worry about it when and if it happens, enjoy the scenery, put your arms out and pretend to fly, wave at strangers and most importantly.... enjoy the wind.

Dreaming the dream.......

2010-08-31T09:49:00.000-07:00

Life is but a dream....
We spend our lives on the 'To Do' and there doesn't seem to be time for ‘Creating the dream’. We feel like slaves to the life that is thrust upon us.

The life you have is the one that you are allowing yourself to have.

If that's so- we can create whatever experience we want.

It can be changed at any moment.
-When you decide you want more.
-When you become intolerant of suffering.
-When you get accountable to your own life.

One day- I had a Dream. In the dream, I envisioned A Village, a place of peace, community and teaching-
an oasis for a changing and lost world.

At the time, there was no foreseeable way that was going to happen;

I had a 2 year old- my marriage was a mess- I'd lost a 20 year career and I had lost my identity.
I owned a small retail store that I had to depend on for my very existence.
I thought there is no freaking' way. This ‘Dream’ was really a vision and part of my Spiritual Awakening.

I bought a three ring binder- I filled it with ideas for the 'Dream'. I wrote powerful words on the cover with a silver marker;. Manifestation- Inspirations- Insights- Notions- Plans- Ideas- Visions- Dreams- and drew suns stars and moons all over it.

What would it look like? What would I do there? Who would come?

Ok, what would I need to get it up and running?
1. A location..(I had visited a wonderful B+B once- I fell in love with it.)
I used it as my backdrop.

2. What were the blocks to getting it?
I made a list.. it started to look do-able!

With help from the Universe- things slowly began to change....I began to change..
I got divorced (not by my choosing at the time) I let go of the store that was a source of exhaustion and huge financial commitment. I spent the next year healing my wounded life, mourning, decompressing, sorting, purging, , praying and dreaming. I was blessed to have the company of my friend and sister Jennifer during that amazing, wonderful, horrible time.

At the end of that year, I had a clearer understanding of the Dream. I had a clearer understanding of what I needed to create it. I got accountable, gained confidence, accepted myself unconditionally, evolved and planned. With every bag of garbage I purged and every relationship I evaluated, I cleared the path of everything that was in the way of the Dream. My ways of thinking- worry- control and fear and replaced them with hope- accountability- faith and surrender.

During those years, my son and I visited our beloved B+B over 30 times. He used to call it ‘Our House’;it was for sale and vacant. In October 2009, I made the call and it was available and do-able. On the Full Moon- October 31, 2009 A Village became a reality.

The day we got the keys- I stood in the living room with my now 15 year old son-
He said "We did it Mom- can you believe it?...It's our Dream come true. Can you believe we are standing in ‘Our House’?!"
I cried that day..
For the woman I was-
For the time wasted in suffering-
For Joy-
For the Future-
and in Gratitude.

So you think you're Psychic????

2010-08-20T07:35:00.000-07:00

Over the last few years I have had this conversation so many times that I decided that it's time to blog about it...lol

There is a great fascination with 'the other side' in our current culture. Due to the fact that society and reality is pretty screwed up at this time. People are being let down by the faith of their fathers and are in search of a greater meaning to it all.

Everyone wants to be 'Psychic' (it is not a gift- we are all intuitive) know the future and predict the future for others. They want to prove that the 'Other Side' exists. They want to disprove that the 'Other side' exists. They view it like a reality show- titillated by the paranormal and the people who chase the afterlife arrogantly and irresponsibly.

It is ignorant and irresponsible to play with something that we do not understand. I now realize why we are disrespected by the Indigenous peoples- we are irreverent in our ignorance and make fun of what we don' t understand. We lack respect.

I'm here to clear up a few myths....

For those of you that know me- I'm a straight shooter- I don't mince words and I don't necessarily tell you what you want to hear. This is not by my choice- it is the agreement that I made with the Universal beings when I agreed to do this work.

I learned in the most difficult and life threatening way- there is a great responsibility by accepting the assignment in this lifetime.

This is not intended to scare you- but someone has to say something before people get hurt.

Our human mind cannot comprehend the way it really works- so it has to be 'simplified' for our limited human thinking. None of us will really know the full story till we get there- and trust me- we will all get there eventually.

When I awakened to a spiritual life- it was not by choice. In fact- for anyone reading this who knows me for more than 20 years- you will agree wholeheartedly.
My life became a train wreck- I was arrogant- controlling- omnipotent- abrasive- rude- punishing-judgmental- unaccountable- irreverent- disrespectful- intrusive-ignorant- and self serving.
I think that sums it up.

This is not a criticism of myself. It is a fact. I used my 'Psychic-ness' like a weapon- I CLEARLY saw what other people needed to be doing- and what was coming for them clairvoyantly, but my own path was beyond my 'vision'. I didn't want to know the message for myself.
There was nothing wrong with ME.....(really? lol)

My awakening occurred as my life spiraled 'out of control'. Disrupting every illusion that I had created. The more I tried- the worse it got.

Meanwhile, I was being surrounded with people from every possible spiritual path- all with the same message of surrender- acceptance- faith- compassion and accountability....None of the qualities that I myself embraced for others..or myself.

This was GRACE (a blessing we receive in spite of not being deserving of one)...this was a loving message in spite of me from the Universe. It was a call to see that I was living a lie- and I was too arrogant to understand that- so I suffered, as I clung to the illusion and it fell apart anyway...i awoke very reluctantly...lol

So once the illusion was gone- I had to look at where I was. Yuk.

Then I started to see that my whole life- the spirits, guides and messengers were always talking to me- they had been allowing me to create every experience as the greatest teaching...so I began to hear them clearly. I now WANTED to hear them clearly so I could begin in a different way....

So if you are still with me- this is where we get back to the 'Other side' and YOUR Psychic ability...

I developed a trusted and loving relationship with my guides- who thankfully ran interference during my ignorant learning period (which almost killed me- a story for another day). I came to understand that my awakening was not just for my journey- but I was to use this learning to teach others how to manage their own personal awakening. That many were being 'CALLED' to serve our damaged world.

But in order to teach- we have to first be the student.
As the societal illusion crumbles people will be lost and looking for answers through faith- through their connection to the Divine.

There are lots of things on the other side- not just fluffy Angels and your dear sweet Grammy.....
I wish that's all there was.
There are many dark things as well- things unenlightened- looking to keep us confused to keep our world in chaos and hate. Sucking power through our fear and hatred and addictions.
Dead people bent on hate and destruction-without the human body..Invisible to us.
Then there are Demons- and a host of Earth spirits.
I have had to opened that door on behalf of clients, who were struggling with those things and had to do battle personally. Facing those things requires preparation, absolute faith and no fear.

We cannot have the light without the dark.

Now- Let's see it from a spiritual perspective...

We're at a party and getting out the Ouija board- tarot cards- mirror- whatever...and decide we are going to 'connect with the other side ' because we think we are PSYCHIC....guess who is waiting to answer you're questions? Grammy? Hell no....

Our arrogance in opening the window to the unknown is 'asking' and what is waiting to answer you is not the Angels- it is the THUG on the street of the 'other side' ready to take advantage of your ignorance and arrogance...

The Light allows us the experience-they allow us free will so we create our own teaching and punishment- because a great teaching is about to occur.....The same occurs
on the paranormal shows where they are pissing off dead folks to capture paranormal activity. That is like watching someone bully another human being for entertainment. It makes me sick.

How bad do you want to know your future?
Looking for spiritual guidance and insight and training is a better way to approach it.

Let me tell you-you already have all the answers within. The challenge is that we as human beings don't like the answer.We don't have to be psychic to know that our future is created through what we are doing RIGHT NOW. We will continue to get more of what we already have unless we make changes to our thinking.

My favorite question is ' Is this the man? The ONE?? Thances are if the last 5 have been jerks- and you haven't self examined-then chances are this one is a jerk too- same teaching, different package. Another test to see if you are going to say no, or demand better for yourself..
You don't need to be psychic to figure that out.

Now- if you want to attract new and wonderful opportunities to your life- and you really want to hear the message that the Universe is sending you- connect with your guides then use your intuitive ability to change you and this world... If you need help- let me know :)

Letting go and becoming......

2010-08-19T05:39:00.000-07:00

Today I dropped my son at his first day of high school; not just high school but an all male high school lead by the monks of Benedictine. A Spiritual place, a society of men.
A foreign world for a woman and mother.
The world of men is a mystery, as it should be.
Allowing him to enter that world without my watchful eye, and allowing him enter the Lodge is a rite of passage and the hardest surrender yet.
Although he is my son- he is a man and I will never be able to understand ( as much as I like to think I do) or fill the place that defines him in that way.
So...today I will be the Bow that bends in the Archer's hand- and allow my son- the arrow to be sent forth in the company of other Warriors...

Children- Kahlil Gibran

And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, 'Speak to us of Children.'
And he said:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
Khalil Gibran

Coyote- The Trickster

2010-06-23T08:08:00.000-07:00

I love storytelling and especially love the traditional stories of our First Peoples.
Some of my favorite stories are about our brother Coyote

.
Coyote represents many things. He is the eternal trickster, always getting others to compromise themselves in order for him to get what he wants, or to do for him what he is perfectly capable of doing for himself.

When it all goes bad, as it inevitably does - Coyote never takes ownership- blaming and shouting his victimization for all to hear!!!

Brother coyote also reminds us to not take things so seriously, that when we do we forger the humor in situations and in ourselves., He is a reminder of the childlike pranks that will crack up the stoniest of faces and situations. Use humor to remove fear and worry....

On the medicine wheel, summer is governed in some tribes by Coyote- the place of birth and innocence. Embrace this time to play, to create, to twirl and skip. Use humor to dispell the seriousness of the illusion we've created....
To balance reverence with irreverence is the teaching of this Wylie trickster!!!!

South Winds of Innocence

2010-06-18T06:27:00.000-07:00

The South winds blow
from the Place where Innocence lives
Bringing the Awakening of the Child
that lives still in my heart.

The simplicity of childhood;
where all that was important
was in this moment.
Where imagination and play
were woven together like a beautiful tapestry.

South Wind of Innocence,
blow the dust of self importance,
worry and fear from my mind
and allow me to remember
the childlike joy of being alive.

Marianne Goldweber