Experiences!

Mastering Managerial Focus: 30 Strategies for Success

2025-03-18T08:30:00.000+05:00

In the dynamic world of management, staying focused and effective is paramount to achieving your goals and leading your team to success. Whether you're a seasoned manager or just starting your journey, mastering the art of concentration and productivity is an ongoing challenge. In this post I will share the 30 strategies that I have learned in my 15 year experience. I will also explore each of them separately in individual blog post. This will help you sharpen your focus, make informed decisions, and become a more impactful manager.

1. Set Clear Goals: The Foundation of Focus

Setting clear, measurable goals is the cornerstone of effective management. Define your objectives to give your work a clear purpose and direction.

2. Prioritize Tasks: Time Management Matters

Not all tasks are created equal. Prioritize your work, focusing on high-impact activities first.

3. Delegate: Trust Your Team

Delegation is key to staying focused on high-value tasks. Trust your team members to handle their responsibilities.

4. Eliminate Distractions: Create a Focused Workspace

Minimize distractions in your workspace to maintain your concentration. Silence notifications, close unnecessary tabs, and create a distraction-free zone.

5. Break Tasks into Smaller Steps: Manage Complex Work

Complex projects become manageable when you break them into smaller, achievable steps.

6. Use To-Do Lists: Stay Organized

Keep track of your tasks with a to-do list. It helps you stay organized and reduces the mental burden of remembering everything.

7. Time Management: Stick to Your Schedule

Create a daily schedule and stick to it. Time management keeps you on track and ensures that you address important tasks.

8. Stay Organized: Clean Workspace, Clear Mind

Maintain an organized workspace. Clutter can disrupt your focus, making it difficult to concentrate.

9. Limit Meetings: Focus on Action

Hold only necessary meetings and ensure they have a clear agenda. Avoid time-wasting discussions.

10. Manage Email: Tame the Inbox Beast

Set specific times to check and respond to emails to prevent constant disruptions.

11. Avoid Multitasking: Concentration Over Multitasking

Multitasking can decrease your overall productivity. Focus on one task at a time for better results.

12. Continuous Learning: Keep Growing

Stay updated with industry trends and continuously improve your skills to stay ahead.

13. Self-Care: Invest in Yourself

Maintain a healthy work-life balance. Self-care ensures you have the energy and focus for your professional life.

14. Reflection: Assess and Adjust

Periodically reflect on your goals, performance, and strategies. Adjust your course as needed.

15. Say "No" When Necessary: Set Boundaries

Don't overcommit yourself. Learn to say no to tasks that don't align with your priorities.

16. Be Adaptable: Embrace Change

Be open to change and adapt to new circumstances. Rigidity can hinder focus.

17. Stay Informed: Knowledge is Power

Stay informed about industry developments, as this knowledge helps you make informed decisions.

18. Use Technology Wisely: Leverage Tools

Leverage productivity tools and apps to streamline your work and stay organized.

19. Seek Feedback: Continuous Improvement

Gather input from your team and peers to improve your management style and decision-making.

20. Develop a Routine: Consistency is Key

Establish a daily routine that works for you. Consistency can improve your focus.

21. Positive Mindset: Harness Positivity

Maintain a positive attitude, even during challenging times. Positivity can boost your team's morale and your own focus.

22. Networking: Build Relationships

Build and nurture professional relationships. Networking can open doors and provide valuable insights.

23. Set Boundaries: Work-Life Balance

Clearly define boundaries between your work and personal life to protect your well-being and focus.

24. Continuous Improvement: Never Stop Evolving

Continuously seek ways to improve processes and workflows, promoting efficiency and focus.

25. Risk Management: Prepare for Challenges

Identify potential risks and create contingency plans to keep your focus in the face of unexpected issues.

26. Focus on Customer Needs: Stay Customer-Centric

Remember your customers' needs and expectations in every decision you make.

27. Financial Awareness: Understand Your Finances

Understand the financial aspects of your role to make informed decisions about resource allocation.

28. Conflict Resolution: Master Conflict Management

Develop skills for resolving conflicts within your team, ensuring a harmonious and focused working environment.

29. Celebrate Achievements: Acknowledge Success

Celebrate your achievements and those of your team. Recognition and celebration can boost morale and maintain focus.

30. Seek Balance: The Path to Success

Remember that success isn't solely defined by professional achievements. Seek balance in your personal life to maintain focus and well-being.

These 30 strategies offer a comprehensive guide to staying focused and effective as a manager. By incorporating these practices into your daily routine, you can enhance your leadership skills, make informed decisions, and steer your team toward success. Ultimately, mastering managerial focus is an ongoing journey, but the rewards are well worth the effort.

The Power of Listening First: Understanding Before Reacting

2023-10-04T12:48:00.002+05:00

In today's fast-paced world, communication often feels like a race against time. We rush to express our thoughts, share our opinions, and make our points without taking a moment to truly listen. The consequence? Misunderstandings, conflicts, and missed opportunities for connection. Let's explore the importance of listening first and then responding, how jumping to conclusions and not giving others the chance to explain can hinder effective communication and relationships.

The Rush to Conclude

In the age of information overload and constant distraction, it's become all too common for people to jump to conclusions without fully comprehending what's being said. We often interrupt, assume, and judge prematurely. This impulsive behavior not only leads to misunderstandings but also damages relationships and inhibits personal growth.

Imagine a scenario where someone is sharing their perspective on a complex issue. Instead of patiently listening and seeking to understand, we immediately formulate our response, mentally preparing our counterarguments. In doing so, we miss the nuance of their viewpoint and fail to engage in productive dialogue.

The Importance of Active Listening

Listening is more than just hearing words; it's about actively engaging with what someone is saying. Active listening involves paying close attention, asking clarifying questions, and seeking to understand the speaker's emotions and intentions. When we prioritize active listening, we create an environment of trust and empathy, which is crucial for effective communication.

When you listen first, you gain a deeper understanding of the other person's perspective. You uncover valuable insights, discover common ground, and identify potential solutions that might otherwise remain hidden. Active listening is the foundation of meaningful conversations and successful relationships.

Allowing Others to Explain

Another aspect of effective communication is giving others the opportunity to explain their point of view before responding. It's easy to fall into the trap of assuming we already know what someone is going to say, especially when we've had similar discussions before. However, everyone's perspective can evolve, and there may be new insights to consider.

By letting someone explain their viewpoint fully, you not only show respect for their perspective but also avoid premature judgment. This practice fosters open and honest conversations where both parties feel heard and valued. It also encourages a more thorough exploration of ideas and fosters a collaborative atmosphere.

In a world that often values speed and immediacy, the art of listening first and then responding is a valuable skill that can transform the way we communicate and relate to others. By resisting the urge to jump to conclusions and by giving people the opportunity to explain their point of view, we create a space for understanding, empathy, and constructive dialogue.

So, the next time you find yourself in a conversation, remember the power of listening first. Seek to understand before being understood, and watch as your relationships and communication skills flourish. In this way, we can build bridges of understanding and cooperation in an increasingly divided world.

Crafting Success: The Surprising Benefits of Arts and Crafts for Managers

2023-10-03T16:42:00.000+05:00

In the fast-paced world of management, where decisions are made in the blink of an eye and stress levels can soar, finding a creative outlet might not seem like a top priority. However, what if I told you that engaging in arts and crafts can be a game-changer for managers? In this blog post, I would like to share the often-overlooked benefits that arts and crafts can bring to the world of management.

Stress Reduction and Mental Well-Being

One of the most significant advantages of arts and crafts for managers is stress reduction. The act of creating art or crafting can be meditative, allowing managers to unwind and relax. This, in turn, contributes to better mental well-being, helping managers to face their professional challenges with a clearer mind and a calmer demeanor.

Enhanced Problem-Solving Skills

Artistic endeavors often involve solving complex design and execution problems. Managers who engage in arts and crafts develop valuable problem-solving skills, which can be directly applied to their professional roles. Whether it's figuring out how to construct an intricate model or choosing the right colors for a painting, these skills can translate into more effective decision-making in the workplace.

Boosted Creativity and Innovation

Creativity is a prized trait in the business world, and arts and crafts are a potent catalyst for creative thinking. Managers who nurture their creativity through artistic pursuits often find themselves better equipped to generate innovative ideas, see opportunities others might miss, and bring a fresh perspective to their teams.

Improved Time Management

Balancing managerial responsibilities and creative hobbies demands effective time management. Engaging in arts and crafts teaches managers to allocate their time wisely, a skill that can be invaluable in a leadership role. By mastering time management, managers can become more productive and better at prioritizing tasks.

Team Building and Communication Skills

Managers who share their passion for arts and crafts with their teams can foster a sense of camaraderie and improve communication. Collaborative crafting projects can strengthen relationships among team members, promote empathy, and enhance group dynamics, which are all essential elements of effective leadership.

Increased Resilience

Crafting often involves making mistakes and learning from them. Managers who embrace arts and crafts become more resilient in the face of setbacks, a quality that is crucial when dealing with the uncertainties and challenges of the business world.

For those who are good at arts and crafts, they are not doing it as just pastimes. These are powerful tools that can elevate a manager's performance and overall well-being. From stress reduction and enhanced problem-solving to boosted creativity and improved time management, the benefits of incorporating arts and crafts into a managerial career are numerous. So, if you're a manager looking to add an extra dimension to your professional journey, consider picking up a paintbrush, a knitting needle, or any artistic tool that speaks to you. You might be surprised at how much it can transform your managerial success.

Lets get Creative!!!

What's in it for the Mentor?

2014-09-25T15:18:00.000+05:00

Recently I got a chance to act as a Mentor for young women who are entering the Job market or who find themselves in trouble in the Corporate World. I took the opportunity as a way of giving back the good experiences I have accumulated in the last 7 years.

A couple of years back, i was very much encouraged by a colleague of mine to motivate young women in getting better jobs and sound careers, I thought I will do it when I am old and have nothing to do. Well, I was wrong.

Now I can assure you that its not only beneficial for the 'mentee' but its also good for the mentor. Let's see how:

Self Awareness: Over the time, we get too busy in the work and forget who we are. When a mentor is giving advise, he/she gets a chance to reflect on those early years of struggle and the experiences gained. And a person realizes how much change the time has bring in you.

Motivation to do good: You feel humble, when another person asks for your advise and there develop a general feeling of being kind and generous and be a positive contributor.

Forecast: When you have "been there and done that" you know what can happen to the young professionals in their next step and what they should do. You are in a better position to forecast the conclusion of the next step, hence act as a guide and keep them on track!

Positive Reinforcement: You not only encourage others to think and act positively but it is also a positive reinforcement for you. You feel the same spirit which you did in the starting of your career.

In short, its a two way benefit trip, both for the mentor and mentee. You feel better connected with yourself with an inner happiness which comes from doing good for others. Small acts of kindness and generosity go a long way in life. We are not just Professional people, we are human beings with thoughts and care for others.

Happy Reading!

Being Human

2014-08-15T12:07:00.002+05:00

Life has so much to show us, so much to teach us. Sometimes we don't know ourselves what we are capable of and how we can react. A while back someone worked real hard to hurt me, and I did got badly burn....I will carry these scars for the rest of my life.

What I didn't knew was that I would learn to love these scars, that they will become a sign of beauty and not hurt. It takes time but if you have a heart that is blessed by Allah, with love and kindness you will find peace in pain.

I always thought nothing can drag me down, no pain can make me hurt for long. I was wrong, some situations hurt you all through your life, some pains you will with every breath you take. And its not bad, it means I knew how to love and trust.

The difficult part was to understood why me. And i still didn't got it but i know something else now. I know I don't have to fight this feeling of pain and hurt anymore, I don't have to go into a panic attack to find someone who can make me happy.

What i mean is, that my feelings doesn't have to change, I don’t need to rush to others to make me happy, I can live with the pain and the hurt and still continue to be the person who was nice to all. I don’t need to be sarcastic to others; I don’t need to be wishing for the pain of others. I can keep my feelings in my heart, be nice to others and be strong enough to handle the pain.

Trust me the pain is not going anywhere, it’s there and it will always be….now after a while it has become a part of me. It’s not bad, it makes me more human, now I know what hurt does to a person and I can help others come out of this pain.

I also understood that in order to live this life I don’t need to have a companion, I only need to have a will to do good to others, to pray, and to live each day as it comes. Its good to know that I can be alone and strong to survive this world. Good to know that though I am hurt, I can keep it in me and don’t make others suffer cause of it. Great to know I am capable enough to still love the people that hurt me and strong enough to pray for their happiness.

I am human! Its crucial for an individual to understand that humans get hurt all the time but they don’t pass on that hurt to others, they live with their pains with a smile on their face. They pray for themselves, for the people they love and for the people who hurt them.

"Trust that Allah is with you and belief that He will give you what you want. It’s just a matter of time", becomes my theme of life. And here I am living with a trust that my Creator is with me and I don't need a mortal being when Allah is holding my hand. He is my Companion, my best friend.

So those who got hurt, Relax...its ok, it means you are human. You can live, I know the pain would never go, and it doesnt have to. You can live with it and still smile and do good deeds. Trust Allah - and you will go through this all.

Remember: “Everything is possible for the person who believes”

Why HR people preach the benefits of Continuous Learning?

2014-06-28T14:09:00.002+05:00

In any healthy organization you will find the HR people always going on and on about the benefits of learning continuously. You will see that the HR people in the organization attend various learning events, social meet-ups and are generally more vibrant and impressive.

Have you ever noticed why this happens? Why they tend to capture attention in a gathering? Why you find people looking out for the HR representatives and everyone is attentive when they speak? Well the answer is simple, in any organization; they are the people who are more aware of “what’s new in the Industry”, “The latest updates, and the new Trends” and “what’s up next”.

This is more attributed to the role of HR people in the organization. They have to keep themselves developed and informed with market trends, they have to be well versed, as they have to reach and connect with people at all levels, internal and external. They are not only desired to be more human, but more knowledgeable and understanding towards all the functions of the organization and pros & con of whatever goes with-in the organization.

As a result of this you will always find them sharing the insights and experiences and encouraging the team mates to take on new learning ventures and explores their skills further. When we learn and make an effort to continuously enhance and enrich are knowledge and skills, we not only end up in developing ourselves but also become a valuable asset to the organization. This not only increases our chances to grow within the organization but ensures better opportunities in the job market.

Hence, Continuous learning is something to be taken on seriously and sincere efforts be made in the direction of enhancing knowledge and exposure. This is mostly a joint venture between the HR people (representing Management) and the Employee itself.

Be sure you are a part of learning organization!

published for Linkedin: http://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20140628090126-153504996-the-benefits-of-continuous-learning?trk=object-title

Gender Dynamics at Work

2014-06-14T12:46:00.000+05:00

Ever wonder why things are different in one organization where there are more men and few women then from one where there are more females and few males. It’s a completely different experience in both the situations. Someone like me who has experience both to the max knows the dynamics that exist.

One where there are more males the environment is charged with currents of male combat and women are treated more as damsels in distress, whether they are upset or not. Simultaneously, a woman would feel more challenged and questioned in such an environment…as all the eyes are on you. And sometimes you feel as if you are less human and more an object in the eyes of males of the species.

But here we should not forget that men with their objectivity helps you get by difficult things quickly. They are great helpers, do the tasks that you feel uncomfortable in doing with great aplomb, stand-up for you, be kind and generous and take my word for it, they are far better friends to a woman then other woman can be (No insult intended)

So, yes I had a fair share of working in such an environment and though it has its moments, yet I can still easily say it’s good to work with male colleagues. You will feel more appreciated and less criticized by them. And trust me where your every moment will be noticed, it won’t be commented by them.

Let’s see the flip side of the coin….women by nature are caring and nurturing and they do tend to take the weak counterparts under their wings and see that they get all the care needed to grow and groom. This same element of their nature makes them sensitive too. This sensitivity goes both ways…negative and positive…if you’re in good books of the lady then she will move heaven and earth to protect you, but if she has reason to question your motives and is a tad suspicious then everything comes out of you will be taken negatively and marked as a personal hit.

There is a third category of women that now exists and I am very happy for that! These women are the most dynamic beings cause despite their feminine self, they manage to think with objectivity then sensitivity, more focused and goal oriented and natural leaders who are taken with great respect and authority by their peers, subordinates and superiors alike. You don’t get much of a chance to question such a woman, neither you think you can survive if you tried to make a pass.

But these types of women suffer too! As either they are a cause for other people’s complexities or people start taking them as a challenge to break them or push them to see how far they will go. Eventually for them it’s tad difficult to gain acceptance and takes a lot of time and sound people management skills to build repo.

If you observe these scenarios in depth you will notice that it all boils-down to one thing only…how we handle people and the situations. It’s a person’s ability to either manage the situations or let the situations manage him or her.

A brief insight for those who like reading, and for women who share the same sentiments.

Happy Reading!

Appraising for Praising

2014-03-18T10:13:00.000+05:00

This is the time of the year when HR teams geared up for the Annual Performance Review of the employees. Quite a hustle bustle is seen in HR departments and a general buzz in Company for the upcoming review drive.

There are a lot of expectations seen in the masses and employees are anxious and excited…..forms are printed and distributed, budget for increment is set, meetings are planned etc etc.

Some thoughtful Companies also arrange for training for their staff that are going to appraised their teams, but what forgotten is the actual spirit of Appraisals.

Generally in Appraisals we forget how an individual has performed throughout the year and the annual review is done on the last three months performance. Which is rather unfair….being in HR for quite a while now this is a general practice that has been observed.

Similarly the most important thing while a person is appraised is to highlight the good things in him or her. While appraising most HODs give a lot of justification why the individual is rated low…the statement usually goes like “Since you lack here….”, “if you had done this better…..” and, “based on your low performance…..” and so the list goes on…..

Why we forget to highlight the good points in so many bad points….why we don’t say “you have excellent communication skills but you also need to focus on……………” or “I am happy the way you handled this task but you have to work hard on …………” Consider the positive impact it will have on your team, and how much it would help in increasing their morale and commitment towards their jobs.

Usually at the end of Annual Review Exercise, instead of happy faces we see a lot of discomfort and negative sentiments from employees…and the debate is should there be a forced ranking system (bell curve) or not! Well it all depends on how you handle it.

Praise them when you are appraising, give them chance to speak and explain, discuss their performance not once a year but on regular intervals throughout the year, and give them chance and opportunity to learn and grow.

Happy Reading!

A fool's paradise - WAKE UP!

2014-02-15T22:18:00.002+05:00

At everyday life we come across people who believe that whatever the situation is, it doesn't concern them and things can go on without being change or disturbed. Especially in the Corporate world where there is a cut throat competition, you will find one or two individuals sitting in the office, and acting as if nothing concerns them.

Such people act in a very dismissive way, usually half lying on the seat, their legs spread in front of them and day dreaming....acting as if something very serious and important is going on in their heads while staring at the Computer while doing little.

These characters also when asked to do some innovative thinking or change the pattern of their work, can start acting like bulls! they do charge on you and then you have to cover your ears because of all the cribbing that will start happening.

In my experience, and i have experience such an individual rather recently, the image that come to my mind is that of a man with an iron cap! Nothing goes in! nopes! Nothing! And man the arguments it takes to get things in the head.

The things that is more surprising and disappointing is that they are living in a fools paradise. They believe that all is good and nothing needs to be change.....They think that everything is heading in the right direction when honestly its not! Infact they are risking their careers because in today's world one needs to continuously update his/her self in education and knowledge.

Everyone who wishes to succeed needs to continuosly transform himself as a better individuals as well as professional, acquire new knowledge, skills, and become an excellent product....which means one should also be very well groomed.

And last but not the least you have to market yourself as a brand! Who can sell your skills better than You??

So those who think it is ok to be the way they are.....THEY BETTER THINK AGAIN!

From Therapy and Fitness Retreats to being HR Business Partners

2014-02-09T20:58:00.001+05:00

HR is still a baby in Pakistan and there are still many organizations where HR is just 2, 3 years old. Keeping in mind this scenario HR is more or less considered as a clinical therapy department, providing psycho analysis and doing cosmetic surgeries….however that’s not what HR is meant to be.

From what little exposure I have received in the last 7years, one thing that I found in a local concern, is that “HR’s work is not important”, “What HR is doing can be done by anyone in the Company”, “If you want to cut down Manpower, start from the HR Department”. Yet despite so much frustration felt by the HR people, a rising hope exist now ensuring a changing role of HR.

HR initially was considered more like a “Post Office” for the business function of the Organization. Now with a growing realization by the CEOs and managements towards the need to have a strong HR in order to have a healthy organization; has given HR more room to grow and develop.

Now we find HR Committees in the organization, deciding policies, man power needs and strategic direction of the Organization. Now HR is considered “Vision Champion” aligning Organizational Vision with the goals and objectives. Hiring and firing are long gone the only role of HR. Today’s HR is more about development of the Human Capital, Talent Management and Corporate Communication.

WHY WE MAKE MISTAKES!!

2014-01-02T16:53:00.001+05:00

We all tend to make mistakes again ‘n’ again from the things that we should have done to the things we shouldn’t have bought….hence, at every turn there is a mistake waiting to happen.

Remember the English text we all studied in college. It was captioned something like “The Day the Dam Broke”. It was all about a misunderstanding cause by confusion between ‘damn’ and ‘dam’. The conclusion is we act on what we perceive than what actually is!

Interestingly every mistake from a plane crash to a wrong meal order, all is attributed to human error and once the human error comes in to picture, all investigations into the probable cause are stopped! We forget to find the actual cause and blame everything on human error.

The real question is to figure out why it all happens? What triggers these mistakes. Do you know that right handed people always prefer the right hand route and vice versa? Do you know that while attempting Multiple-choice questions people usually have doubts about their first choice of answer and know the second option is the right one…yet they still go with the first choice as the preferred choice.

It all happens because we have certain preconceived notions and perceptions and despite having doubts we tend to stick by them instead of altering our decisions. For centuries men (and women too!) have known to act on perceived things instead of investigating, this results in buying the wrong property, a wrong marriage decision, not taking action when required and the list goes on…

Being human we tend to make all the mistakes that are humanly possible. What is required is a realization that sometimes our mistakes are not our own but a combination of perceived thoughts by people around us…interestingly we all think in pretty much the same way J but let’s make effort in changing the perceptions…..our own and of others and make less mistakes…especially those that can be easily avoided!

Buying Tomatoes!

2013-10-09T15:43:00.002+05:00

The other day, in one of the marts…I was buying vegetables. On the shelf where the tomatoes were placed, there was a group of three selecting tomatoes out of the bunch. I went up to that corner and started placing tomatoes in the cart.

While doing that I realized that no one was paying attention to the bottom half of the shelf where there were good tomatoes. Everyone was focused at the far end of the shelf, stretching hands, pushing others, picking the wrong ones and then sorting again. While such good, red tomatoes were lying very close to us.

Then it stuck me that in the same way we ignore so many good things close to us and just worry about what lies ahead or what we can’t have easily then what is ours to have. So much we come across daily, little things that happen all the time…and we just ignore them because we are too busy thinking about things that are not with us, that we want to have!

What a way to treat life! Everyday, God place good things in our path and they get trampled cause we are too far sighted. So much gets lost in this daily rush. Little things that can give us so much pleasure, a thank you from some one, a loved ones smile, the happiness on your child’s face…so much we loose thinking about what lay ahead us and the wish list we have.

And what we get in return? Nothing but anger and frustration! And the effects of these frustrations get spilled on to people who care for us, who wish to see us happy.

It really made me asked me, what am I doing? I have a great loving family, amazing friends and a job that not only pays well but keeps me happy. Then why the fuss? Why worry for future that is not known to me! Which neither I can predict, nor I can control! I must be really stupid for wasting my breath on something I have no control over.

The best I can do is live to the fullest in every moment, in every breath…and thank God for giving me what I have. No more wasting time on things those are unseen!!

Let’s stay focused on Today!

Shadow of a doubt!

2013-06-03T11:06:00.000+05:00

We often see ourselves surrounded in issues and we jump to certain conclusions. Without thinking much and with no in depth analysis of the reason and cause of our dilemma and the implications related to the path we are about to take; we set the wheels in motion.

But once we are about to accomplish what we set out to do, shadows of doubt start seeping into our perceptions. And believe it or not the more we discuss and share our doubts the more confuse we become. With every discussion shadows of doubt and confusion strengthen more. Its amazing to see how we started off, how sure we were and how confuse we are now!

It’s important to understand the dynamics of decision making. Why I use the term dynamics, is because we are not the only one responsible for our decisions. In a Pakistani society, your parents, siblings and even your extended family members show a considerable influence on your decisions. And like it or not most of the decisions are not made because they are rational decisions but “to please others, to become acceptable and to upgrade once station in social circus”.

Other then them, there are those who are our friends and even acquaintances play an important role at times. All this lead one to wonder, do I have any right on my own life or its just a commodity to facilitate and please others!

As I mentioned earlier the same situation leads to an endless series of doubts and fears. How to overcome them?? Well dear all, please start believing more on your self then on others, and trust me, before the decision is finalized everybody will be giving suggestions and highlighting points of worry. But once the decision is finalized, you will realize the crowd has suddenly vanished and you are standing alone….happens all the time!

So, be ware. And accept the challenge. Prove your metal and work hard. You and only you can make your own destiny and create a future for yourself. Trust and acceptance of your strengths and your weaknesses will lead you to your future. Make decisions that you can live with and not what others want!

Happy and wise living!

a journey of love!

2012-12-28T10:40:00.000+05:00

Sometimes you learn things that you never thought to learn. In these things some are amazing and take you on a journey of discovering your own self and the power that lies within you. I recently went through such a journey…a journey of love!

By love I don’t mean the love as in ‘Romeo and Juliet’ only, but much more than that. Being Muslim we strongly believe that Allah created everything with love, and love is the only power that holds us together and keep us going.

I never knew that all I have accomplished in life so far is because of the love I have received and the love I have for others, my family, my soul mate, my work and life in general. They all have given me so much, made me what I am today, have given me strength and passion to live to the fullest.

If I traced my life backwards, all that I see and can conclude is that though there has been a healthy share of grief and pain, of betrayal and heartbreaks but I have managed to survive all cause I was given so much love by my Creator (Allah), my family and the person I love and cherished most.

My love of life comes from this and I strongly belief that “Love bears all, endures all” It is what keeps us motivated and hopeful of life, which in return generates positive energy that is the key ingredient of success in everything in life both personal and professional.

I can assure you I would never have been so successful in my professional life if I have not been given so much love, it gives me an inner strength and peace that is essential to create new ideas and deliver the best every time in every training session that I organize or facilitate.

Love is a positive energy that shimmers around you and lights your way in every difficulty. It’s not only about loving the other person (off course its importance and a very strong motivation) but there is love for everything in the world, for helping others and creating beauty and peace where ever you go. It’s the energy! The power!

ANGER...a killer

2012-12-15T23:57:00.000+05:00

How anger hurts? Not others but yourself as well. You loose all, your loved ones, relationships and care. Anger is termite that chews its way up the tree of relationship. I have seen people, great, amazing people getting angry very quickly with slightest of triggers.

I am sure you all have heard the saying: "Don't be like someone who starts in anger and sit down with a loss" if you know this old adage then you must also realize what it means. Believe me you can not hurt anyone more than the person who loves you as they are more vulnerable and more exposed! You actually know when and where to hit.

Love is an amazing medicine that heals all and gives a person the courage to stand for the right things, do good and spread happiness among all, where as, anger only creates more anger with a dressing of hurt and pain to go with it.

What a person can do to control his / her anger? Whenever you get angry think all the good things that happen to you, how another person loves you and is crazy for you. Most importantly remember what your anger will cost them! Whenever we hurt a person, we give them a wound. Wounds do heal unfortunately scars never go. They leave an ugly mark to remind you of what happened. REMEMBER THAT!

As for the person who loves you, he / she should handle you with so much love and care as if you are made of glass and are very fragile! This will help you or the other person to bring down their temper and relax.

In anger both the parties get hurt and affected. So, its not your or your partner's loss only! it is the loss of your relationship. Why hurt something that we have created with love and affection and have nurtured with great care and patience. sometimes, we with great luck finds a person who is one in a million....why hurt or loose them??

think about it!

Group dynamics

2012-12-03T23:20:00.002+05:00

How the Group works? Is it important to be in the Group? these are the questions that are taught to us when we are in college and universities. However, the real learning happens in our work lives when we face these things practically. What you read in books and what is taught in the universities does not apply completely in practical lives.

Group dynamics is not just about working together socially with different individuals but it has a lot to do with behaviors and psychology prevailing in the group. It happens because people from different cultures, casts and backgrounds...speaking different languages join together to form a group. The purpose of the group is the accomplishment of certain specific goals, however, coming from different backgrounds every individual has a different perspective and understanding of the tasks assigned.

Therefore, meeting the deadlines, achieving goals requires a great deal of understanding of each others behaviors and attitudes, their thinking limitations and how the gaps can be bridged and goals accomplished. Believe me it is easier said than done. There is usually a great deal of friction between the members of a group and usually it ends up having sub-groups in a group.

No two individuals are alike! its a universal fact and should be accepted by all! Even if you belong to the same culture, you would be different from your other counterpart. So, with this fact established the most essential thing that is required is to develop tolerance and be patient of others around you.

Psychology is a very interesting subject and I would advice everyone to at least develop a general understanding of the subject which will enable them to work better as a team or a group and with more chance of success and accomplishment.

Remember you or I, we can not work alone! Silos do not work! We have to work in a group, develop an understanding of each others behavior, accept and acknowledge, tolerate and care to ensure continuous success and motivation.

To be or not to be!

2012-11-28T23:23:00.003+05:00

A question we often ask ourselves is to be or not to be?? I wonder why we are trained in a way that 95% of us are always doubtful of our decisions and needs and wants. Very few of us actually know what they want.

This can very well be related to our work or personal life....from school, college to offices..the misery continues and discontinues.

The most difficult of all is to handle this dilemma in our relationships! How one handles this? I am still at a loss to figure this one out. However, in professional lives my advice for anyone is to be upfront right from the start. Be straightforward. No one is married to the Company so compromises are not always required or expected. Though, what is expected of you is a sound knowledge of the area you are hired for. How concrete your knowledge is and how adaptable you are!

In your professional life the question "to be or not to be" will put you in a strained situation only when the decision is in your hands and may be you are stuck with the issue of what is right or wrong? should I tell the boss or not? this is not ethical but politically correct? Saves me but not anyone else?

Now what you will do in such situations? Remember the learning your parents and teachers gave you. Be honest and sincere to your self and to your work! It would not be easy to choose the right way, but all you can do is be realistic and rational, think whats best for everyone and how able you are to handle the consequences! and please please don't try to by-pass any of your superiors no matter how you dislike them. It does not leave a good impression of yours and who knows who will you find in your next job.

So be wise and make the right decisions as best as you can. To be or not to be will always be there...its up-to you how you handle it!

Entrepreneurs - the need of time

2012-11-11T23:22:00.000+05:00

Entrepreneurs - What a term! When I was in university (which is almost 6 years back) there was a lot of talk regarding Entrepreneurs and how it is becoming vital for societies to pay attention in creating more and more of these Entrepreneurs...However, at that time it didn't made much sense to me and like every other common individual I was only concerned with getting a job and making money.

I did got a job and it went very well for a while but with increasing inflation and the downfall of economy including our law and order situation has added to the problems of the people with decreasing purchasing power and increase prices. Now when I look at the Job market I realize what a stagnant condition is and we all our stuck whether we like it or not.

Now me and many other like me are struggling to start their own business for the two main reasons: one, our current jobs are not providing enough to help us meet our ends and secondly there is no job security. We are genuinely struggling to work our way out of it. I am not saying that jobs are bad but they are not enough and in cases like mine they are definitely not enough to satisfy my intellectual hunger plus I am definitely lacking in my corporate-political skills.

I remember two things from my time at University...one "the vanishing middle class" and second "Entrepreneurs". There was a lot of buzz on the subject and God help me why I didn't paid attention to it back then...now I am working hard to made up for the loss time.

To every student, young individuals out there...it is my sincere advise to please study those subjects that equipped you to handle yourself in tough times and make you self sufficient so that you can go out in the world on your own.

Prince charming!

2012-11-10T00:05:00.000+05:00

How many of us are lucky to find our prince charming? and when we find him, are we able to recognize him? That's the biggest question I have faced all along but truly when you find him or her (Princess) you would know it all by your own self and gut feeling. Please dont ignore that tingling sensation that you have in the presence of any such person.

Its been my experience that whatever used to go wrong in my friendships and other relationships went right with the right guy and I was so pleasantly surprised that it took me weeks to adjust to this new feeling. But honestly things change as if magically and all goes right between the two of you even if the world seems to be going down the drain. And off course it doesn't matter cause you have the one you love and want!

Finding the right person is not easy but what's more difficult is to hold on to that person all your life, to ensure that the fire between you to keeps on burning and is renewed now and then. You have to find things that you enjoy doing together to ensure a stronger companionship.

I am no love guru but I have learn this from experience that to ensure a healthy and positive relationship you have to be honest, sincere and at times blunt! Believe me when we dont clear misunderstandings and issues we are just building cases against us that pile up to become a wall between us and our partners. So, its better to be straightforward and blunt and please dont pretend even for the sake of your loved one cause for one thing you will be setting the wrong precedence and secondly YOU CAN NOT PRETEND ALWAYS!!!

So why even try doing that?? Be yourself! if he / she loves you they will be with you no matter how good or bad you are!

And prince charming always stays with his princess no matter how odd the situation is!

Relationships and today's world!

2012-11-04T00:38:00.001+05:00

What a dilemma! No matter how much effort you put in it is hard to understand and hard to describe. Now how to put it in words?? I have been there and done it all! Well not all....but I know the rules of the game well! Every women out there must be knowing the games men play and I must admit we are very apt in both either playing or dodging.

For me, I have done both and have gone through a long list of "admirers" which I believe that were not interested me at all...they were just desperate to have someone and may be I was the only one around at the time. Its difficult to find and assess who actually wants you and love you for what you actually are.

There are many people that come and go in your life but how many do you want to keep and hold on to? Hardly any...and believe me its better not to rush in any decision and get your self strangled! Its much better and appropriate to be alone and wait for the right person to come along in your life.

Dont make wrong and rash decisions in this regard specially! Believe me its pointless to get married for the sake of marrying only. I have seen couples getting married and then regretting it! WHY?? Cant you wait? Believe me its worth it! When the right person comes along you will be grateful for all the waiting you have done as it will be worth it. What's the point of doing something cause others want it and not you! that's pathetic! Please stop living for others and live for yourself....its far better, more practical and makes you feel happy and at ease with yourself.

The men who come in your life, they may look nice on the surface but who knows what they actually are from the inside? They enter your life with agendas of their own (not all very nice and pleasant agendas to cater for) and then they turn it upside down and leave when they feel like it. Now tell me how sane enough this approach is to get married without thinking? I think NOT! Wait guys and see for your self what's right or wrong.

And trust me in the end you will find the guy who will make the life look like a blessing, who will ease all your pains and make you feel like a princess with no problem at all! You must be wondering that how would you know if he's the guy for you? Well, i'll tell you...when you'll find him you will feel a strong pull towards him and as you get to know him you will both be surprised and shocked to see that how perfect that human being is and how easy and comfortable he has made your life!

So, waiting is better then regretting and please listen to yourself and cater to your own needs first then start the charity work! I hope you all will find the right person who will not only make you feel happy but will complete you and your existence in ways that you thought were impossible!

Calamities!

2012-10-29T23:51:00.000+05:00

Recently there is this buss going on for hurricane Sandy which is about to hit East Coast of America in next couple of hours. Watching news I realized that how many of us considered the calamities that happen to the humans in any given day!

Natural calamities damage the masses where as the calamities happening on a personal level damage the person himself and those around him! Nevertheless the damage is as potent as a natural calamity is to hundreds and thousands.

But did we ever stop and thought that we need to be prepared for it the way we are preparing for 'Sandy'?? I guess not! We just let things happen to us and the damage is more cause we didn't prepared our self. If we would have, we would be in way better shape, especially psychologically.

As a child is growing up, we need to prepare him / her to handle these calamities which can be in the form of law and order situation, accidental deaths in the family, separation or any other such incident which marks the life of an individual rather permanently.

Now the important point which needs our time and attention is what we need in to develop in our-seleves and in those around us to survive such incidents and not only just live through them but also emerge happy and safe with a balance heart and mind.

All that happens around us impact our thinking and understanding hence effecting our psyches, so, naturally it becomes important to armed ourselves with skills and abilities that help us fight this war of sanity, health and happiness! what is required and how it can be achieved! If we talk in terms of training and grooming an individual the most important factor that comes to mind is making people aware of their skills and abilities.

How would you fight a war if you dont know what weapons you have? So, creating awareness is EXTREMELY important regarding ones own abilities and strengths. The second point is to develop the weaker areas, which can be anything....from physical fitness to mental health, emotional well being or may be simply communication or problem-solving skills.

The third and to me the most important factor is to develop what you already have! It's difficult to improve areas where we are weak or to develop whats not their but to enhance and improve upon the gifts of God bestowed upon you is easy and natural.

This means if you are good at something, like emotional intelligence, teamwork or anything at all then your chances of improving it further will be greater than anyone else and to use such skills in managing yourself and handling situation is crucial for ones success in good and bad times!

To sum it all up we can say that anything can be handled and managed and all the calamities, whether personal or on a larger scale can be dealt with, if one is equipped with tools and skills to survive and succeed!

Happy living :)

Corporate Flirtation

2012-10-21T23:20:00.002+05:00

Anybody who is unaware of the term or how its done?? I don't think so! We are all way to familiar with it! Now and then every women who has worked in the Corporate World has been subjected to it....and is familiar of tackling the situation in a subtle way.

There may be mere nuisance or can get serious at times, but honestly the serious situations are rather rare and one can handle matters of such nature easily. There are two questions in my mind always when I think about it: One why man do it?? and the other is Why the hell every body notices it??

What is so great that every men tries his hand at it?? Come on don't you have your jobs to do that you are wasting your time on it?? and even if you like someone sincerely then please make sure that you don't do anything that is disrespectful and can cause talk!

People make cake of themselves when they move around a woman at work! They are like lapdogs wagging their tail and drooling all over! I might sound nasty but the fact is that its pretty irritating and annoys the hell out of the women who are hard at work and with a deadline to meet! and here is a guy standing close to you (or at least trying to be close) and smiling showing all his 32 teeth. This calls for a shut-up call and that hurts their ego's real bad! Don't you have anything better to do??

And even if someone is being a fool then why the hell everybody is noticing it?? Apparently they don't have anything to do either! And the moment the guy is out of the ear shot they will come close to you and will very sweetly remark about that particular guy and inquire what was he saying! What the nerve these guys have (this role is played by both: man and women) The worse thing they do is make up stories and then share it with the entire office!

Now the real issue is how to handle it? The best one can do is politely show them their place (in other words cut them to size ;p), they may not get your meaning the first time but if you ignore or give them a cut direct they'll get the meaning in second or third time eventually!

If it still doesn't help and you feel the situation is getting out of hand then dear all please approach the management ASAP and report the behavior of the person as completely as possible! Don't risk it! who knows there is some spycho living among us.

One thing I am certain about is every women is equipped with enough instincts and skills to handle the out-of-control nutheads! You handle them and you can handle them always with great poise and serenity and earn great respect from everyone around you.

Hats off to the women at work!

Emergencies and Urgencies!

2012-10-21T01:36:00.004+05:00

In a professional environment it is difficult to determine what is urgent and what is an emergency as it largely depends on the person who is your supervisor or manager or the Boss. Be in any position that's one thing that you have to determine on your own, off course you can't go and stand in front of your boss and ask him/her if its urgent or its just an emergency at the top level.

Do you know the difference between the urgent and the emergency?? I bet you do! Urgent is the work with a decent level of background and a deadline whereas emergency has no background or at least not a recent background but is the product of wild imaginations of the people sitting at the top. In the third world countries especially the entire functioning of the organization is dependent on the thoughts of the owners or COO/CEOs.

Whatever they think becomes the policy or the guideline or norm for the organization. This constitutes a lot of emergency rather than urgency. Recently I have experienced that alot and on the basis of that I can tell you that it takes a great deal of conscious effort and control over your mind to stay positive.

Urgencies I understand! We are all working and we have to meet the deadlines however, emergencies are beyond especially the ones that have little or no background and then you have to push aside all your duties and work on these emergencies with your Boss standing over your head! It's pathetic, actually its worse then that! But what one can do??

My advise would be to make it clear to your Boss, colleagues and peers from the start that If you have to work on an emergency then your other duties may suffer and everybody has to understand this. Be as specific as possible and never miss the right opportunity to make your mark and explain your situation.

Other than this I firmly believe that with a positive attitude one can achieve a great deal in life and at work. Keeping a cheerful outlook on things make it easy to tolerate and go through the hassles of the day and also help your colleagues to have a great day albeit a very pressured one!

Characters in a Team.......the fanatics

2012-10-08T23:37:00.001+05:00

In my last write about the Teams and their dynamics, I shred my thoughts on the subject and after much discussion with my colleagues and on their insistence I finally am writing about the various characteristics of every team member.

I don’t know how many of you have observed these characters in the offices but they are there, all you need is an observant eye and you’ll find them in no time. To start of the one character that I have observed most is the Comedian. The senseless, mad and wild. This character will leave you feeling frustrated with your own self and you know why? Cause no matter how hard you try to put something in his brain, hardly anything goes in.

He talks and talks and loves to interfere in everyone’s business. Sometime you will be in the middle of a very important discussion and all of a sudden the comedian will pick the thread of your conversation from the middle and will pass a comment which will surpass all logic and sense.

On the other hand the intellects and the moderators spent most of their time getting frustrated. You will identify them as individuals who have something important to say, they know what’s right….they will open and close their mouths several times waiting for a chance to say what they know is right but my….the aggressors and the comedians hardly give any one a chance to say what they want.

I know some of you are recognizing these characters and please no offense….I have no intentions of hurting anyone at all, but that’s how it is. The aggressors are the one who hardly spent any time being patient and cool headed. They are 90% of the times are sitting on the stove and burning others around with their style and their talks. They are like cyclones, moving…running, creating chaos and leaving destruction behind where ever they go.

The intellects are the most decent lot. They use their brains in the right way and get the most done but the poor fellows have less control over anything which affects their productivity. The point that is worth mentioning here is that if any one of the elements is missing there would be no fun in the teams, all these characters even out each other well and then where is the fun in being grownups when we can be kids at heart and fight, and argue and in the end bounce back to each other and have a good laugh.

So, teams are not fun at all without the fanatics.

Living on the Edge!

2012-10-08T00:46:00.000+05:00

Living life to the fullest! How many of us are able to do it?? Hardly any and do you ever thought why is that?? For the last one year I have been going through the experience of a life time and learned a lot along the way. The most important lesson that I learned is that we ourselves only are the cause of restricted living!

We restrict ourselves for some godforsaken reason that we only half understand ourselves and simultaneously we try to understand ourselves from others perspective and so live a life on the precipice of happiness and doom on either side of us....we keep on weighing alternates but never truly decide whats best for ourselves. The basic reason is we are not using our own views and thoughts, we judge things like, "if I do this then mom will say this....." or "I like it but I cant do it coz daddy wont like it" so where are we in all this??

This is the most common illness faced by the South Asian generations! We are brought up to be tolerant of others and accept everything that is being given to us. Unfortunately there are some cases like me where we use our own brains to decide for ourselves! There are certain consequences but I assure you they are worth it! We, the new generation are the trendsetters!

We believe in living to the fullest! Now when I see people my age or the younger lot I realized that our elders have done a great job in allowing us to be ourselves in a way that even if we are not exercising or are unable to exercise freedom in practicality still our imaginations and thoughts are free to take the flight! They are not rotting in our skulls!

So, now the question is whats next? If you ask me the next step is to take the leap! Living on the edge to me means taking risks and challenges and proving your worth. Make your life worth living and please take control of it!

Get up and get moving!