Writing All Wrongs

Prove You're Alive

2013-02-04T07:12:00.000+01:00

In loving memory of Nathan Boyle.

Dress-Like-Nathan Day

Prove You’re Alive

by Andrea Johnson

I remember when I first learned that my class would be getting a new kid. My close friend and classmate, Jason, and I sat outside the school on the curb on the last day of school our sophomore year and talked about it. “What if he doesn't like us?” we wondered. “What are the chances he’ll like us?” And then we proceeded to construct a mathematical formula to determine what percent chance there was that he would like each member of our class individually and then the class as a whole. It’s funny, looking back, how we never bothered to consider that we might not like him. I don’t think it was really ever an option.

Nathan’s arrival to Paradise Adventist Academy was the most exciting change in our class as far back as we could remember. He had a crazy hairstyle with bleached streaks amidst his black spiky mane. He wore bandanas and clothes that looked like they came from Hot Topic. Living close to Chico, known as the party town, we’d seen people like this before but we never thought one would come to our school. Not only that, but he was in our class. He was our peer and we were all excited to see what he would be like.

Like any normal kid in a new situation, he started out quiet, but after a bit of calm observance, he warmed up and decided we sheltered kids were alright in his book. Nathan became the glue in our class; he really brought people together with his goofiness. He was crazy in ways we’d never seen before. He licked my arm on multiple occasions. He kissed Jason on the cheek on Valentine’s Day while wearing lipstick. He ran around on all fours. He made pterodactyl noises. What made all these quirks so incredible was how he used them. Many people act odd to annoy people or to get attention. Nathan used his quirks to bestow affection on everyone. Not a single person at PAA could avoid witnessing or receiving these random acts of Nathan. And everyone loved him for it. Our student body even made a spirit day in his honor, “Dress Like Nathan Day.” The whole high school participated.

During his first year at PAA, Nathan was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease. Being the fighter that he was, he went without medication for a long time. He was a strong believer in natural remedy and he entered the war against medication wholeheartedly. Nathan never saw medication as a long-term solution. He only used medication on an “as-needed” basis. Occasionally, a strong flare-up would occur and he would take medication. Although this sent the Crohn’s into remission, he hated every minute he was taking medication. He never felt truly himself while taking it. As part of his battle plan, he drank kombucha, a slightly fermented health tea, every day, amped up his exercise routine, and ate healthier than anyone I've ever met. If it weren't for the Crohn’s, I’m convinced he could have lived forever.

It was during my senior year that I really got to know Nathan. We began hanging out away from school. I would have baking parties or movie nights on the weekend and he would always tag along with Jason, who had become his best friend. At these movie nights, Nathan always nagged me to watch Fight Club with him. It’s this really intense mind-trip film about fighting the system and living with purpose. He had gotten me to read the book and I knew that there was going to be too much blood for me to handle. Knowing I wasn't ready for the intensity but also knowing that it was his favorite movie of all time, I promised him that as soon as I was mentally and emotionally ready to watch it, I would inform him.

As the last half of the school year began, our class was preparing to participate in the annual senior marriage project. The girls have to wait until someone proposes to find out who they are paired with. One day I was practicing choir after school when suddenly, Nathan burst into the choir room. He was dressed in bright green cut-off sweat pants, a black and white striped shirt with a vest on top and a purple bandana. On anyone else, this ensemble would have been unusual, but Nathan was always making bold fashion choices; I didn't think anything of it. Next thing I knew, Nathan had picked me up, flung me over his shoulder and was taking me outside. He placed me in a cardboard box with the words “Pirate Ship” scrawled on the side in black sharpie. He turned to me and said, “Arr! Marry me or walk the plank!” I of course said “yes” and then he gave me my wedding ring: not a piece of costume jewelry from Claire’s like most of the guys in my class had done, but a clear plastic ring with a flower design that turns pink in the sun.

We spent the next several months planning our spectacular wedding, “getting married”, and even raising a baby, doll of course, together. I personally think we had more fun than any other “couple.” Our marriage plans included a ceremony on Earth Day while we were barefoot, Thai food at the reception, and wedding colors chosen to match the main ingredient in our favorite Thai dish, eggplant. All the details were uniquely catered to fit both our bold personalities, which Nathan helped me learn to be comfortable showing. Excitement was valued over practicality because, heck, why shouldn't weddings contain craziness and spontaneity? We took all our ideas and ran with them. Full speed. Straight ahead. Together, we sprinted into our own imaginary sunset. It was the fictional wedding of the century.

Our "baby"-to-be, Riddick Emery Boyle

That was three years ago. Then this last spring, Nathan got really sick again. I had spent the year in Costa Rica and the previous summer in Spain so I hadn't seen him for a year. Needless to say, I was anxious to meet up with him. When I saw him at the beginning of June, he seemed to be doing well even though he’d lost quite a bit of weight. We made plans to watch Fight Club together the next week. I finally felt I had reached the point where I could handle the intensity of the movie and I was ready to make good on my promise to watch it with him before watching it with anyone else. The following week, I texted him to finalize plans. He texted me back saying he had just gotten out of the hospital. He said it so nonchalantly that I was barely concerned beyond the initial “Oh no!” reaction. He brushed it off as nothing and his confidence kept me calm. He said we could watch the movie at his house the next night with Jason, but he made a point to tell me that he had lost some weight and might not be his usual energetic self. I replied without hesitation, “I will love you forever and always.”

The next day I headed to Nathan’s house where he and Jason were already horsing around. We situated ourselves and commenced the viewing. The thing I remember most about the movie was the intro. The intro contained a written disclaimer made by Tyler Durden, one of the lead roles of the movie. The disclaimer contained this phrase: “Prove you’re alive.” I remember seeing that and thinking, Oh! No wonder Nathan loves this movie! That is so him! I made it through the movie unscathed and then we headed out to the Jacuzzi to discuss life. We talked about all sorts of things but naturally, our conversation turned towards Nathan and his health. He explained that he had been having complications with Crohns and that there was an abscess in his colon, which was why he had been in and out of the hospital recently. His plan was to go to a clinic in Florida where he could better pursue natural methods of clearing up the abscess. Both Jason and I were proud of him for wanting to pursue natural methods but we were also worried. An abscess can be a big deal. We both asked him about taking medication and about surgery. He explained that surgery was a definite possibility but that he wanted to give the clinic a try. His confidence silenced my fears and we ended the evening with promises to all hang out again when I was done working at summer camp.

Less than a month later, on July 17, I got a call from my mom while I was working at camp. She didn't leave a message. That was the moment I knew something was wrong. I tried to call her back but she didn't pick up. Trying to remain calm, I checked my facebook to get my mind off the non-existent message. As I scrolled through the newsfeed, the story began to emerge. I saw a post by Jason saying that Nathan was in the hospital and that he was going to have an emergency surgery. Jason asked that everyone pray for Nathan. I promptly commented asking for an update. Less than a minute later, I received a message from my friend, Cassie, confirming my greatest fears. Nathan had passed away.

I can’t even begin to convey my feelings at that moment. If you've ever lost someone, you know what it’s like. If you haven’t, I will simply offer this: It is the truest form of heartbreak. I never thought my heart could be broken by someone I didn't love romantically, but it can. I loved him. I loved him with all my heart and losing him broke my heart. The thing I never knew about heartbreak is that it’s a literal, physical pain. On your chest, over your heart, you feel a burn, a pain that you know isn't there because someone punched you; you feel it inside. That’s something they never tell you.

The next Monday, July 23, we had the memorial service. If ever there was a perfect memorial, this was it. It had all the usual elements of a memorial service: pictures, music, shared memories, tears, and even laughter. For some reason, it felt like Nathan had planned it. When we graduated from high school, Nathan surprised us all by singing. He had been in choir, but we’d never actually heard him sing. At graduation, he sang Lean on Me with a few other guys. Jason, Jason’s dad, a few other close friends of Nathan, and I sang it at the service. Even though it was a tribute to Nathan, it felt like encouragement from him, encouragement to lean on one another to get through our grief.

On August 15, a group of us went to scatter Nathan’s ashes. We went to the river to a place behind the Feather River Hospital that we locals refer to as Balls Falls. It’s a secluded spot on a river with a thirty-foot jump. It was Nathan’s favorite place to go. Jason told us how the first time Nathan went, he was really afraid to jump. Nathan took his time, but eventually he did jump and he never looked back. As we neared Balls Falls, we saw Craig, Nathan’s dad. Through some clever and careful maneuvering, he had managed to get the urn with Nathan’s ashes down the rocks, unbroken. In the spirit of Nathan, alive and powerful, we all jumped off the rock and into the water below. Together we swam around and enjoyed the cool water after the long hike.

Gradually, we all came together on a rock on the opposite bank, circling Nathan’s ashes. Craig began to speak. He shared the story of Elijah and Elisha, where Elisha asked for a double portion of Elijah’s spirit. Craig challenged us to consider Nathan’s spirit, his character, and to choose a trait Nathan carried that we would like to live out. He urged us to share our choice with each other and to hold each other accountable to the challenge. With Nathan’s ashes safely deposited in the river, we all dispersed, contemplating Craig’s challenge. At the time, I couldn't decide which part of Nathan’s spirit I wanted to claim. He was so loving, so affectionate, so inclusive, and so open. How could I possibly choose just one trait?

A few days later, I was thinking about my last day with Nathan when I suddenly recalled the quote, “Prove you’re alive.” That was it! That’s what I wanted, what I want. I want Nathan’s boldness for life. I want to prove my existence by the way I live and by the way I love. That’s exactly what Nathan did. He never held back affection and he never backed out on experiences for fear of what might happen. He overcame his fears and lived without inhibition. I believe the reason that we all felt Nathan’s loss so strongly was because of the amazing life he had. When he passed away, a candle didn't go out, a bonfire went out. But his legacy lives on. I still feel that burn in my chest. And it hurts; it hurts every part of me. But it reminds me how much I cared about him and how much he cared about me.

In a way, that burn is the reason I’m sharing this story. Losing Nathan lit a fire in my heart. It intensified my passion for life. I want to be held accountable to my choice to live like Nathan. I don’t ever want to forget Nathan’s legacy. So hold me to my promise. Remind me to run and to jump and to sing and to kiss and to love. But most of all, remind me to prove I’m alive.

Nathan, Jason and I dressed as Cavemen for our Senior-Class Video

Slideshow

2012-06-21T06:28:00.000+02:00

This is a video the youth group in Monteverde (specifically, Isaac) made for me right before I left Costa Rica. They played it in church and I cried the whole time. Leaving all my friends, students, and adopted families was one of the hardest things I've ever done.
If you have been wanting to see a highlight of my year, take a look. =]

The end

2012-05-24T16:08:00.001+02:00

This is it. I'm no longer in Monteverde. I'm in San Jose with my long time family friends. My flight leaves a 3 pm, which means I need to be at the airport by 1 pm. For breakfast, there will be Gallo Pinto for the last time...

These last few days have been really hard. I had to say my goodbyes, pack, give tests and I managed to get sick. Luckily I didn't get really sick until yesterday so I got to enjoy my time with friends.

I'm going to miss everyone. EVERYONE! I already miss my students. Many tears were shed saying goodbye to my family. The hardest part was saying goodbye to Sofia. I had her in my arms and we were just hugging. She started crying and I could feel her little body shudder with each sob. That's what really did me in. I hope Kindria gets skype soon!

Thanks to all who read my blog and prayed for me!!! It really meant a lot to me.

I hope to see you soon. In under 24 hours, I'll be on American soil!!!

Paz, amor y pura vida!

Que pereza

2012-05-15T03:06:00.001+02:00

One of the most common phrases used by my students is "que pereza" which means "how boring" or "I'm tired of this." As frustrating as this can be to hear when you're a teacher, I totally relate right now. I wish I didn't, but I do.
I'm finding it hard to find the balance between getting ready to go home and still be present here at school. I've lost a bit of my focus. It's not even that I'm bored or tired of this exactly, I'm just tired. Whatever the case, I refuse to let it diminish my quality of work even if my pereza (laziness) forces me to stay up all night to finish the review sheets that are oh so vital to the students' success in the exams we will have next week. Even though I'm tired and ready to see my family and friends back home, I'm going to kick myself until I finish. I will not let my laziness be an enabler of a bad test grade.

Johnson & Johnson

2012-04-12T00:36:00.001+02:00

This is an actual conversation I had last week (in Spanish, but I'm translating it for your convenience).

"Your last name is Johnson? Johnson, like shampoo?"
'Well, yes, but no.'
"Oh. Ok Andrea Obama."

Uh...I'm not sure how we got from shampoo to Obama...but God Bless America!
I suppose I should have seen it coming. There is something fundamentally "American" about the last name, Johnson.
Whatever the case, it made me laugh.

Ginger-Garlic-Lemon Kick!

2012-04-10T04:05:00.002+02:00

I'm not exactly sure what to call this concoction, so we'll just call it witch's brew. It's amazing. It's surprisingly tasty! It can probably cure anything you have that is respiratory related. I was inspired by my wonderful friend Jacinta, who has cured innumerable people through the use of her own version of this drink. I'm not exactly sure how she makes hers, because she only made it for me once, but I know the ingredients she uses so I went from there. I decided to make mine more like a tea. I like tea a bunch and I thought that it'd be nice to have something I could drink throughout the day. Here's my recipe:

Witch's Brew

Ingredients:

3-4 cups water
1 inch section of fresh ginger
2 cloves of garlic
1-2 teaspoons of crushed cayenne pepper (not powder, unless you wanna die)
4 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
2 tablespoons honey

Process:

1. Dump water into a cauldron and turn up the heat.

2. While water is coming to a boil, grate the ginger and garlic into the water.

3. Bring water and ginger to a boil and then let it simmer 3-5 minutes (by simmer I mean gently boil)

4. Bring water, garlic, and ginger back up to a happy boil and throw in the cayenne.

5. Bring down the heat and let it all simmer for 3-5 minutes.

6. Take the concoction off the heat and dump in the lemon juice and honey.

7. Stir and strain into a thermos or whatever.

8. Drink and enjoy better health.

Everything

2012-03-30T03:48:00.000+02:00

I can't tell you how many times I've shared this with the world, but I think it's sharing again. I just can't get over how powerful this is.

Letters

2012-03-20T22:58:00.001+01:00

I love letters. I really do. I've sent so many while I've been here. It's major progress for me. My mom used to bribe me and/or take away privileges to get me to write thank-you notes. I enjoy writing them now. I think the key is good stationary. Here, I have a great excuse to use postcards. I love using postcards. I may make my own postcards when I get back. There's just something about them that feels so familiar...It's like you're right there with the person. You get to see what they see.

But there's also this other kind of letter. It's called a fundraising letter. I plan to send out around 150 letters. Maybe more. I have 40 ready to go into the mail right now. Fundraising letters are tricky. You never want to sound desperate, even if you are. You want to capture the attention, give reasons for supporting, leave a way out if the person doesn't want to contribute, and this must be accomplished in one page. No more, otherwise you will bore your reader. No less, or the reader will assume it's not worth their time. Psychology, folks.

I hope my letter is good. I plan on spamming the world with it. In fact, yours may be in the mail within the week.

If I don't send one to you, it's probably because I don't have your address. I'm not kidding when I say I'm sending it to everyone. Spammmmm!!!!! But the good kind. It's to support a good cause.

Actually, I'm going to put my letter right here. Just in case you don't get a letter and you feel moved to contribute.

Here goes!

Dear (Handwritten name goes here)

I have been given an exciting opportunity to be a servant and a minister this year. Through the Student Missions program at Walla Walla University, I have spent the last 7 months (and will spend the following months until June) as a volunteer teacher at Centro Educativo Adventista de Monteverde in Costa Rica.

My last 7 months have been a great adventure and there is more to come. I arrived in the middle of the school year and a new one is underway. We have a new principal and I am the only remaining volunteer from the last school year. The school requests the aid of volunteers not only to help teach English but also because the Adventist community is very small. There are few Adventist teachers but despite the small community, we have been presented with a unique and wonderful opportunity.

Our Adventist school is the only Christian school in the area of Monteverde. This makes it very appealing not only because of the good education we offer, but also because of our beautiful values. More than 80% of our students are not Adventists. This is an amazing opportunity to develop relationships and spread the love of God to our students and to their families as well.

I would like to ask you for prayer support. First, I need prayer for myself: my continued safety in my new home. Also, that God will continue to prepare the hearts of the students, their families, and the community. I know that God will use me to be His ambassador while I am here. God has given me this opportunity to share the gospel both by example and through relationships. Secondly, I need prayer that I can raise money to help the school and its students. I aim to raise $10,000 dollars. Please consider being on my prayer team for these needs.

I want you to know that the school did not ask me to send out these letters, but because I am part of the teaching team, I know the school’s needs and am acting accordingly. The money raised will be used for 2 main causes. First, a roofing project that was started last year but was never finished. The second, and in my opinion, the most important cause, is to give financial aid to students. There are many families, whom I know personally, that desperately wish to send their children to our school. Because of the high cost-of-living due to tourism, they struggle to make ends meet and paying for a private education is not an option. We never want to turn children away from our school, but without payment, we have no choice. Tuition is roughly $1300 for a year ($110/month for 11 months). It breaks my heart that these children do not have the means to receive a Christian education and it is something I want to help change.

I appreciate your willingness to invest in this ministry. I hope to raise the money by June 2012, before I leave, but a gift at any time would be great. If you decide to make a donation, your gift will be tax-deductible. Please write any checks to the Chico SDA Church and label it Monteverde Adventist School.

Thank you for your prayer support and possible financial support as well.

Many blessings,

(My beautiful signature goes here)

The actual letter is not in italics and I included an addressed envelope to the Chico SDA Church. Being out of the country, I couldn't get US postage so I figured an already addressed envelope was the least I could do. A little nudge, so to speak.

Chico SDA Church

1877 Hooker Oak Ave.

Chico, CA 95926

Moments

2012-02-23T01:28:00.001+01:00

In case you hadn't heard, life is made a of moments. Here's some of my favorites from this week.

Two of the rowdy 5th grade boys stayed a whole half hour after school and painted ducks with water colors while I cleaned the classroom. We listened to Mozart the whole time and they didn't complain once.

One of the new 4th graders (who has only known me 11 days) saw me in the internet cafe and walked back and forth in front of the window waving for about 2 minutes.

My little sister struck up a rather deep conversation (for a 4 year-old) and asked me why people should be nice to each other. That night when I got home, she crawled in bed with me and she fell asleep hugging me.

Esteban, my 3 year-old Kinder developed a remarkable love for having me read to him in English. I went over to his house today and he made me read to him for 10 minutes.

Daniel, our new 2 year-old Kinder, didn't cry when his mom left the Kinder room. I think that's pretty remarkable for day 2.

Andrea's Easy Enchiladas

2012-02-21T00:58:00.001+01:00

My wonderful parents brought me enchilada sauce when they came to visit and I finally put some of it to use today.

And so we begin. The photo tutorial of Andrea's Easy Enchiladas. But first, some history.
I am a halfsican, in case you didn't know. And in case you don't know what that means, it means that I'm half Mexican. My mother grew up making enchiladas, the real deal, where you dip the tortilla in sauce, throw it in hot oil and stuff it with cheese. However amazing these taste, it's a lot of work and so my mom invented* a short cut that I learned before I even went to school. Yeah, they're that simple. So when I was six, my school was making a recipe book and my mom entered the recipe as Andrea's Easy Enchiladas. She used my name (remember, I was only six) to stress how delightfully easy they are to make.
*I use the term invented, loosely. I'm sure others have done it, I just haven't seen it.

Now for the tutorial. This is for making individual enchiladas. Maybe one day I'll give you a tutorial for the original, which is a bake-version, but I don't have the original recipe or an oven here in the blessed highlands of Monteverde. So if you want to try the bake-version, read this recipe and adapt. Deal? Deal.

Tools:
- A plate
- A can opener
- A spoon
- A microwave
- A fork
(do you see how easy I'm making this for you?)

Ingredients:
- Enchilada sauce (if you wanna get all fancy, try making your own, but I use it from a can. A 10 oz can will be more than sufficient for one person)
- Corn tortillas (3 for one enchilada)
- Cheese (not sure about the measurements. Maybe like, 1/2 cup? I like the shredded cheese blend, but basically, anything that melts well will suffice)

Ingredients and Tools. Minus the microwave.
You know what that looks like, right?

Step 1: Sauce your plate. Sauce it, ever-so-slightly, bigger than the tortilla.

Step 2: Layer 1- Place your tortilla, sauce your tortilla and hit it with cheese.

Step 3: Add 2 more layers of tortilla, sauce and cheese.

Step 4: Nuke it. About 1 1/2 minutes should do it.

Tips:
- Taste your sauce before you use it. If you don't like the flavor, tweak it. If it's too spicy, add some tomato sauce (no, not spaghetti sauce, silly!)
- Don't skimp on sauce. There are few things sadder than a dry enchilada. Don't drown it either. Enchiladas are not good swimmers. Find a happy medium.
- Layer your cheese evenly. It's frustrating to have no cheese on the edge and then get too much goo in the middle.
- You are not required to make an enchilada with 3 layers. You can do just 2 or you can do 50! Have fun. Btw, if you make an enchilada with 50 layers, please take a picture and show me. I'd love to see that!
- Let the last sprinkle of cheese be more for garnish than for taste. Trust me, you probably put too much in the middle layers anyway.
- The sauce WILL splatter when you microwave it. I suggest you cover it.

The end. Try it. Enjoy it.

Soon

2012-02-07T22:41:00.001+01:00

Let me make one thing clear (if I haven't already). I LOVE it here. But anyone who's been away from friends and family for an extended amount of time will understand that even if you love where you are, it's still perfectly reasonable to miss the folks back home. For that simple reason I made this countdown today. That and I'm sick. It came out of nowhere, which is really annoying. Yesterday, I was fine and then I just started coughing in the middle of the night. Super lame. Anyway, now you know, and I know, how long I'm here for. Just for funzies. It's sooner than you think!

A tea-light candle

2012-01-28T04:15:00.001+01:00

A tea-light candle

that had once been new,

lay crushed, forgotten.

Rescue: overdue.

Wick: non-existent.

Wax: badly scorched.

Judging by shape, it

had clearly been smashed.

A candle like this,

ugly, abandoned,

is easily trashed.

So why was it saved?

The reason is simple;

A candle gives light.

Wick and wax matter,

not scent or the size.

Candles are equal

when the lights go dim.

Darkness is strong but

light pierces the grim.

Hummingbirds

2012-01-22T00:28:00.001+01:00

Another post of pictures. This is near the Monteverde Reserve. There's this little cafe that has about 6 hummingbird feeders. It's amazing. An Olingo makes frequent visits to get a drink of the sugar water.

Christmas Break with the parentals

2012-01-21T22:07:00.001+01:00

We're going to keep this simple. San Jose to Monteverde to Playa Pan de Azucar to Arenal and back to San Jose. Pictures are in chronological order. Enjoy.

At a rest stop on the way to Monteverde

My Costa Rican Family
L-R: Sofia, Kindria, Aileen, Me

Canopy Tour

We bought these lemon flavored peanuts...

Ficus

Monteverde Cheese Factory

Towards the Atlantic

Towards the Pacific

Playa Pan de Azucar

Arenal

It is literally this hard to take a picture of a Morpho with its wings open

Unless it's dead

Market in San Jose
150 colones or 30 cents for this delightful pipa

Best accident ever

Coffee

Maybe

2012-01-20T16:26:00.002+01:00

Never before has a new year been so unlike the old one. My last 4 months can be described, summarized, encapsulated (you get the picture) in one word: Perfection. Sure, I’ve had my ups and downs, spells of homesickness and times of sheer exhaustion, but those moments have always been fleeting. The school year ended smoothly and vacation was beginning. What more could I ask for? In addition, I was living with a family who loved me and who loved each other, or so it seemed.

On New Year’s Eve, the father of my Costa Rican family came back from a party, staggering drunk. He could barely stand and his speech was slurred as if he had just had his tongue numbed. After resting a bit, he got up and demanded the car keys. He was clearly in no position to drive; He could easily kill himself or a pedestrian. My Costa Rican mom offered to drive him home to rest, but that didn’t cut it for him. To make a long story short, it quickly escalated to a physical struggle and he was arrested shortly thereafter. Later, I learned that this has happened before and although it was years ago, this was the last straw. He was also unfaithful in his marriage. Divorce papers are being signed. My family’s lives had been turned upside down in a matter of hours.

That night, I hardly slept. I cried to God to save my family. I prayed that the two young girls (4 and 9 years old) would be spared the sadness of a broken home. As I prayed, I began to realize that whether or not there was a divorce, this was already a broken home. I instead began to pray that God would surround the family and that they would feel his love for them and keep them from further harm.
Later, as I shared all this with my mom (as in, Lupe), she asked me what it meant for me. Was I going to still live there or would I have to move again? I realized that I didn’t want to move. I love my Costa Rican family with all my heart. Even though I can’t fix the marriage or erase the damage that was caused, I can do my part to make sure that life continues. Things as simple as making sure the laundry is done, the dishes are put away, and the house is clean can make a world of difference for a single, hard-working mother. I can make sure mom gets a break when she comes home from a work by playing with the girls or even just watching a movie with them. Though I came here to teach, maybe this family is my real mission, or rather, God’s real mission. Maybe I’m here “for such a time as this.”

*Update* My story was published in the Collegian, the student run newspaper at WWU.

At a glance...

2012-01-04T21:36:00.002+01:00

As some of you know, the Costa Rican school year is opposite to the one you are familiar with. It's actually really convenient because rather than saying "the 2011-2012 school year," it's just one year we're dealing with. We start in February and end in December. Easy-peezy-lemon-squeezy.

So, while I wasn't around for all of it, I have picture from almost all of it. The school year, I mean. I made a slideshow for the kids and they all got to take the dvd home to have forever. I'm quite proud of that.

I know some of you are thinking "Oh boy...A 7-minute slideshow of kids I don't even know? Good holy!" but, come on! Just watch it. You have time; I know you do. If not to see how precious and awesome these kids are, then just do it for me so you can see a snippet of the life I'm living.

P.S. Click on the video because it's no fun to watch it when it's this small. =]

Overdue

2012-01-04T20:47:00.001+01:00

It's really a good thing for me that blogging is not like the library. If my blogs were due every 2-3 weeks, I'd have so many fees to pay. I'm also glad that blogging is not homework. If my blogs had due dates and got graded, I'd get a good grade but I'd drag my feet the whole way and then BS my way through it.

As it stands, I get to write what I want, when I want and how much I want which, for the last month, hasn't been much. But here I am, sitting on my bed in an empty house and I want to write. Really, I do. No one is making me do this and trust me, I could be watching movies (I have roughly 140 GB of movies) or scouring the interwebs (as I lovingly refer to it) for music and such. I'm happy to be sharing at this moment.

Here's the highlights of the last month (minus traveling with my parents, which will be shown in a subsequent post)...

Decorating the Christmas tree. We listened to all my favorite Christmas music!

Graduation dinner/Family photo

The Johans before graduating from Kinder

The only photo I have of the graduating 6th graders. They're blatantly "camera shy."

Look! I got an award for my "Dedication and Efforts in Costa Rican Education."

Last day of school water fight. We're incredibly lucky that the sun came out and that the wind died down.

And then Nate and Calle left. They left on the 11th of December. Very sad, but such things must come to pass. After they left, I deep cleaned the classrooms, which I will have to do again before school starts back up, and thus kept myself occupied until December 14. That's when I took the bus to San Jose to stay with family friends and pick up my parents from the airport. Stay tuned for the exciting story and more pictures!!!

50 Rules for Dads of Daughters

2011-12-01T01:41:00.002+01:00

Missing my daddy and I came across this post.

Providence.

1. Love her mom. Treat her mother with respect, honor, and a big heaping spoonful of public displays of affection. When she grows up, the odds are good she’ll fall in love with and marry someone who treats her much like you treated her mother. Good or bad, that’s just the way it is. I’d prefer good.

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2. Always be there. Quality time doesn’t happen without quantity time. Hang out together for no other reason than just to be in each other’s presence. Be genuinely interested in the things that interest her. She needs her dad to be involved in her life at every stage. Don’t just sit idly by while she add years to her… add life to her years.

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3. Save the day. She’ll grow up looking for a hero. It might as well be you. She’ll need you to come through for her over and over again throughout her life. Rise to the occasion. Red cape and blue tights optional.

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4. Savor every moment you have together. Today she’s crawling around the house in diapers, tomorrow you’re handing her the keys to the car, and before you know it, you’re walking her down the aisle. Some day soon, hanging out with her old man won’t be the bees knees anymore. Life happens pretty fast. You better cherish it while you can.

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5. Pray for her. Regularly. Passionately. Continually.

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6. Buy her a glove and teach her to throw a baseball. Make her proud to throw like a girl… a girl with a wicked slider.

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7. She will fight with her mother. Choose sides wisely.

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8. Go ahead. Buy her those pearls.

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9. Of course you look silly playing peek-a-boo. You should play anyway.

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10. Enjoy the wonder of bath time.

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11. There will come a day when she asks for a puppy. Don’t over think it. At least one time in her life, just say, “Yes.”

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12. It’s never too early to start teaching her about money. She will still probably suck you dry as a teenager… and on her wedding day.

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13. Make pancakes in the shape of her age for breakfast on her birthday. In a pinch, donuts with pink sprinkles and a candle will suffice.

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14. Buy her a pair of Chucks as soon as she starts walking. She won’t always want to wear matching shoes with her old man.

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15. Dance with her. Start when she’s a little girl or even when she’s a baby. Don’t wait until her wedding day.

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16. Take her fishing. She will probably squirm more than the worm on your hook. That’s OK.

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17. Learn to say no. She may pitch a fit today, but someday you’ll both be glad you stuck to your guns.

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18. Tell her she’s beautiful. Say it over and over again. Someday an animated movie or “beauty” magazine will try to convince her otherwise.

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19. Teach her to change a flat. A tire without air need not be a major panic inducing event in her life. She’ll still call you crying the first time it happens.

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20. Take her camping. Immerse her in the great outdoors. Watch her eyes fill with wonder the first time she sees the beauty of wide open spaces. Leave the iPod at home.

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21. Let her hold the wheel. She will always remember when daddy let her drive.

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22. She’s as smart as any boy. Make sure she knows that.

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23. When she learns to give kisses, she will want to plant them all over your face. Encourage this practice.

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24. Knowing how to eat sunflower seeds correctly will not help her get into a good college. Teach her anyway.

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25. Letting her ride on your shoulders is pure magic. Do it now while you have a strong back and she’s still tiny.

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26. It is in her nature to make music. It’s up to you to introduce her to the joy of socks on a wooden floor.

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27. If there’s a splash park near your home, take her there often. She will be drawn to the water like a duck to a puddle.

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28. She will eagerly await your return home from work in the evenings. Don’t be late.

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29. If her mom enrolls her in swim lessons, make sure you get in the pool too. Don’t be intimidated if there are no other dads there. It’s their loss.

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30. Never miss her birthday. In ten years she won’t remember the present you gave her. She will remember if you weren’t there.

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31. Teach her to roller skate. Watch her confidence soar.

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32. Let her roll around in the grass. It’s good for her soul. It’s not bad for yours either.

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33. Take her swimsuit shopping. Don’t be afraid to veto some of her choices, but resist the urge to buy her full-body beach pajamas.

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34. Somewhere between the time she turns three and her sixth birthday, the odds are good that she will ask you to marry her. Let her down gently.

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35. She’ll probably want to crawl in bed with you after a nightmare. This is a good thing.

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36. Few things in life are more comforting to a crying little girl than her father’s hand. Never forget this.

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37. Introduce her to the swings at your local park. She’ll squeal for you to push her higher and faster. Her definition of “higher and faster” is probably not the same as yours. Keep that in mind.

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38. When she’s a bit older, your definition of higher and faster will be a lot closer to hers. When that day comes, go ahead… give it all you’ve got.

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39. Holding her upside down by the legs while she giggles and screams uncontrollably is great for your biceps. WARNING: She has no concept of muscle fatigue.

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40. She might ask you to buy her a pony on her birthday. Unless you live on a farm, do not buy her a pony on her birthday. It’s OK to rent one though.

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41. Take it easy on the presents for her birthday and Christmas. Instead, give her the gift of experiences you can share together.

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42. Let her know she can always come home. No matter what.

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43. Remember, just like a butterfly, she too will spread her wings and fly some day. Enjoy her caterpillar years.

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44. Write her a handwritten letter every year on her birthday. Give them to her when she goes off to college, becomes a mother herself, or when you think she needs them most.

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45. Learn to trust her. Gradually give her more freedom as she gets older. She will rise to the expectations you set for her.

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46. When in doubt, trust your heart. She already does.

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47. When your teenage daughter is upset, learning when to engage and when to back off will add years to YOUR life. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

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48. Ice cream covers over a multitude of sins. Know her favorite flavor.

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49. This day is coming soon. There’s nothing you can do to be ready for it. The sooner you accept this fact, the easier it will be.

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50. Today she’s walking down the driveway to get on the school bus. Tomorrow she’s going off to college. Don’t blink.

Did you know that my daddy is better than this?

It's true.

I love him.

The original post and photo credits can be found here:

50 Rules for Dads of Daughters

Latesgiving

2011-11-30T01:33:00.002+01:00

Thanksgiving did not go at all as planned this year. If you recall, I was incredibly gung-ho about preparing the perfect feast and cooking everything myself from scratch. I scoured the internet for recipes that don't require ovens (since nobody has one and those that do are afraid to use them). I found a reliable recipe for stuffing and of course, mashed taters, but pie was going to be the trickiest.

Planning was difficult, but progressing when I received notice that the youth group trip to Alajuela to return the favor of conducting the Sabbath School and Church service was moved to Thanksgiving weekend. This meant that practice was moved to Wednesday and Thursday night before leaving on Friday. This, in turn, meant that there would be no time for cooking or feasting. I was devastated, but feigning optimism, I called my parents, informed them of trouble and arranged to skype them in between school and practice: a 3 hour window. It ended up perfectly. I talked to my family and they showed me all the great food I was missing out on. Our conversations ended pleasantly, and though I was sad not to be there with them, I realized how happy I am to be where I am, doing what I'm doing.

Friday came and with it, the trip to Alajuela. I was tired to begin with, but after the long car ride and a couple hours of practicing, I was ready to sleep. So needless to say, I was a little irked by the fact that everyone in the house decided to stay up 'til 12:30. Amazingly, I was ready for the day when I woke up. I showered, breakfasted, got in costume and headed to church, which was just 6 houses down. The Sabbath School Service was a play of sorts with special music, scripture and the mission story mixed in. It was the story of the 10 virgins. I was one of the 5 that didn't bring extra oil. My part in the play was to say a few lines and...wait for it...sing special music. In Spanish!!! I sang Solo Cristo (None but Jesus). I was really nervous, but I made it through with only one noticeable squeak. The rest of the service went beautifully. After church, we had a deliciously filling potluck and then nap before evening worship, supper, and evening games.

Supper is back on track with the topic of Thanksgiving. Our group went to PriceSmart, which is the exact same as Costco. It was wonderful. We got pizza and then we roamed the halls of the store and low and behold, we came across a pumpkin pie. I was so happy that I did a little dance. Obviously, I bought it.

After supper and evening games (which I did not participate in on account of being too full), we went back to the house where I was happy to stay up and talk to my new friends from Alajuela. We stayed up 'til nearly 1 am. Next day, we went to some pools where we swam and got some much needed sun. By the end of the day, I was flushed but not burnt. It was glorious. After bidding farewell to everyone, we made the long trek up the mountain to Monteverde where it was raining, per usual. And yet, I was happy to be back in the comfort of this town I've grown to love over the last *gasp* 3 months. I still can't believe it's been that long.

Finally Monday came. This was the day Nate, Calle and I were planning to celebrate Thanksgiving. We used the packet of mashed taters that came from WWU Student Missions, the pumpkin pie I bought in Alajuela, and to this mix we added corn, homemade stuffing, sparkling grape juice and rootbeer floats. It was glorious. We laughed, we listened to music and we took pictures. Then we carefully set up the dinner table, said a prayer ("God on three, 1, 2, 3, GOD!!!") and dug in. We ate soooo much. Many smiles, laughs and burps (kind of a contest) later, we cleaned up and went into Calle's room and watched Psych. I ate so much I couldn't lay on my stomach. I was so happy.

Reflecting back on it all, I don't mind at all that Thanksgiving didn't turn out how I planned. I wasn't home, but if I had been home, I wouldn't have met so many awesome people, I wouldn't be teaching, I'd still be horrible at Spanish. As it stands, everything that happened to hinder my plans of "The Perfect Thanksgiving" just made it better. Just another reminder that God is in control and that his plans are better than mine.

Jesus and the 10 virgins

Clearing my throat before the big Spanish debut

Oh soymilk, how I miss thee

Stuffing in the makings

I dish it out real good.

Happy to the point of squinting

Salud!

Pumpkin pleasure

A visitor

Come and see...

2011-11-23T04:45:00.003+01:00

Whenever folks asked Mother Teresa about her work...how it was going, what life was like, she would say, "Come and see." - Shane Claiborne, The Irrestistible Revolution: Living as an Ordinary Radical

It's about time I issued a request for service. In less than 3 weeks, I will be the only volunteer here. As we near test week and eventually, graduation, I am becoming acutely aware of what this could mean for the school. Currently, we have 5 teachers (Yolanda and Tere split up the day so that someone can be in the office). To function well, we need 4 teachers and a Director. When Nate and Calle leave, we will have me, Tere and Yolanda, who was actually due to retire last year. Although the church is very active and dearly wishes that volunteers were not necessary to run their school, the reality is that the school cannot afford to run without volunteers.
My request to you is that you would seriously consider coming to serve a school year here. Pray and ponder this request carefully. If this is not in God's will for you, maybe it's His will for someone else. Please refer your friends to the Mission Call here and to me if they have any questions. The call can be a bit confusing, so let me break it down for you. This is what you need to know:
The request is for service from February 13, 2011 to December 17, 2011 (10 months) in beautiful Monteverde, Costa Rica. *Clarification. I know this call will be over in less than a month, they just haven't posted the new one. You can still apply to this one.* The school is grades kinder (starting age 3) to 7th grade (considered to be high school). Teaching of all subjects is fair game---Bible, Math, Science, Music, Social Studies, Art, English, etc...Living arrangements will most likely be with a family who has a child in the school or possibly with the Director. You will receive a stipend of $100 (US) each month. Pretty much every store up here accepts US dollars and they will give you change in Colones so changing money is easy and there are plenty of ATMs. You don't need to apply for a Visa (though you do need a passport), which is really handy. You just need to leave the country every 90 days and your Visa is automatically renewed. For any other questions, refer to the Mission Call or ask me. I'm glad to answer questions.
Now it's time for me to gush about how awesome it is here. The school is small and growing too. Things have been tough, financially, but it's getting better. The school is awesome because you get to know all the kids individually; no one gets left behind. The church family is wonderful as well. They have a very active youth group so it's easy to make friends by going to the worship they have every Thursday or to game night after sundown on Sabbath. Monteverde is also a really safe and friendly town. It's a big location for tourists even though it's 2 hours away from another paved road. Teaching is hard work, I can't deny it, but it's so rewarding. When I least expect it, I'm completely blown away by my children. For example...The kinders are learning not to take toys or hit each other...My 1st graders can spell almost all their spelling words from memory...I found a way to get my 5th-7th graders interested in music...My 3rd and 4th graders are actually paying attention in class...It's a really beautiful thing. I literally could not stop smiling in my first grade science class today because I found out they had been studying at home. They noticed and laughed at me because of my goofy grin.
Honestly, I do miss home sometimes, but I've grown so much and learned so much that I can honestly say that I in no way regret coming. Coming here is one of the best decisions I've ever made. Please take my request seriously and pray about it. If you are called to serve, God will find a way to get you here, so don't even try the money excuse on me, haha. =] If you are not called, pass this on to anyone you think might be even mildly interested. Paz y amor!

Independence Day!!!

2011-11-04T00:56:00.002+01:00

In Central America, September 15 is a well known holiday. It's Independence Day! It's a big deal like in the States, only this is for multiple countries. Pretty cool stuff.

Sisters getting ready for the parade!

Happy Calle

Cheese!!! Nate and Daniel

Daniela, 7th grade

Monse, 1st grade

Tony, 1st grade. This kid is ridiculously sweet and ridiculously tall.
He's only about 8 inches shorter than me!!!

Fabian, 4th grade

Photoshop fun with Nate

Johan, Kinder

Belen, 3rd grade

Tracy, 7th grade

Yolanda!!! Our wonderful directora

Ugggggggghhh...

Brothers, Pablo, 4th grade and Johan, Kinder

The other Johan, also kinder

Tere, wonderful woman and teacher and her son, Esteban
Who loves the stache?!?

Rachell, 1st grade

Little sister Sofia

Valeria, 1st grade

Esteban

Rudi aka Shirley Temple, Cousin of Esteban

Rudi and Kayra (used to be in Kinder but recently left the school...so sad)

Goodbye dinner for Daniel

Goodbye party for Daniel at Ivan and Mayi's

Monse, Thug Life =]

Overwhelmed

2011-10-25T05:55:00.001+02:00

It's not what you think. I'm not overwhelmed by the work I'm doing, though it is tiresome at times. I'm wholly, utterly, unreservedly thankful for everything I have. I know it's not thanksgiving, but why wait for a holiday when I can be thankful right now? Everything about today just threw my blessings right in front of me and I can't not share them with you.

Clear skies - This morning, the sun came out and it remained clear for much of the day. In fact, I can see all the stars right now. It rained for a total of 9 days straight. I hope I never take a clear sky for granted again. I love the sun and I love stars. Sometimes, it takes horrible weather to remind me of this.

New tastes - Almost as soon as I got home tonight, Jeison handed me a piece of sugar cane. Soooo yummy. I've had it before, but it just reminds me of all the wonderful things I've gotten to eat and try here. Firstly, you should know that I've been reconverted to the love of eggs. For those of you who don't know, before last spring, I hadn't eaten an egg (by itself) for at least 3 years. Now I eat them all the time and they're quite delicious, I must say. I even had one over easy and liked it! Big steps for me. I also got to try Mamon Chino (lychee fruit) and starfruit, both of which are absolutely delicious. I've also tasted quite of few things I don't like (I don't remember names otherwise I'd share) but they make me enjoy everything else so much, I don't really mind in the end. I love food.

My Costa Rican family - They are one of the biggest joys in my life. This morning I had to chase Sofia through the house in order to get her hair combed before school. We laughed the entire time. Then this afternoon as we were watching a video in Kinder class, she gently worked her way onto my lap and fell asleep. Have you ever had a child fall asleep on your lap? It was perhaps the most sublime interaction I've ever shared with another person. She is precious and I love her. Aileen is maybe the most kindhearted person I've ever met. She always draws me darling pictures of the family (with me included!) or asks me if I need anything. She loves to tell me stories. I hope to have a child as sweet as her one day. Kindria is like a big sister and a mom all wrapped into one. Not only does she take care of me, but she talks with me, shows me new things to cook and laughs at me when I get freaked out by the giant bugs that frequently wander into our home. Jeison is awesome too. He built me a door for my room and is always ready to share exciting things about Costa Rica with me. He has a wealth of knowledge to share and I appreciate it.

My biological family - I got a package from my parentals today! It was filled with stickers and other small trinkets for kids. It also contained a MUCH appreciated Spanish/English Bible, an Adventist Hymnal (in Spanish and with the actual music so I can learn the songs properly), earbuds, a recipe for homemade play-doh, and chocolate covered caramels (definitely my Dad's doing). So much joy from one box! My parents are really so wonderful. They never fail to take care of me and even when they don't give me what I want, I know that they're doing what is best for me. I miss them like crazy. I miss my brothers too. It's been so great getting postcards from Phil and I always hope that he and Mike are online when I have free time because I love talking with them. They have had a profound influence on the person I am today. I love my family.

Mail - As evidenced by the bit about the package I received, you probably already realize that I love mail. It's such a joy to get something by mail. A postcard, a letter, a package...all are wonderful. Mail is extra special because we all know that it takes more time to write a letter and put it in the mail than it does to get online and leave a comment via facebook or send an email. Not that those are bad; I love those too, but I always squeal in delight when I get a letter. Snail mail is beautiful.

Friends - I'm so glad Nate and Calle are here. I'm really going to miss them when they leave. They've been so much fun to work with and hang out with too. In fact, we just finished doing Yoga (P90x). We are just like a little family and I'm really glad I've gotten to know them here. Now to all the rest of you. You know, I miss you a lot too. If you're reading this, I would like to send an extra little dose of thanks your way. =] Really, I'm just thankful for all of you. Thanks for the prayers and the letters and the kind words on facebook and the skype time. I can feel the love even though I'm countries away. I love you all!

God - I'm thankful for God because he's the reason I'm so blessed. He gave me friend and family and he's the reason I'm here in Costa Rica. God is good all the time and all the time, God is good.

Excitement to the maxxxxx!!!

2011-10-20T06:06:00.002+02:00

I just got the best news ever!!! Seriously!!! My parents are going to be here for Christmas!!!!!!!! They'll be here December 15-27! I'm the luckiest girl alive!

Here's some of my past Christmases. Hope you enjoy!

Baby's first Christmas

Back when we actually sent out Christmas cards

Who's jealous of Phil's rad haircut?

Even Vega joins in the fun

Haro Christmas. You kinda had to be there...

Snowshoeing on Christmas day!!!

Meh.

2011-10-19T05:21:00.001+02:00

Today was a very, Very, VERY forgettable day at school. I don't know what happened to me during the night. I went to bed in a decent mood, but when I woke up, I was grouchy and tired. I got a full 9 hours of sleep and yet it took a good 90% of my will power to get up and the rest of it to pick out an outfit and get in the shower. I was so lazy I didn't even wash my hair or make coffee. Yeah, that lazy. In between classes today, I played sudoku (the one from the wwu sm newsletter) to keep myself awake and in a decent mood. I threatened to kick kids out of my class a little more than I should have, too. I'm not proud of that. Strangely, although I was dead tired and just wanted to call a taxi and crawl into bed (have I ever mentioned that it's a 25 minute walk from my house to school?), the happiest part of my day was during 1st grade Bible class. I let each kid pick a song and we sang. We sang loud and with motions. I don't know what I'd do without my first graders. They motivate me and aggravate me all at once. I fully intend for tomorrow to be a better day. Maybe I'll start taking my vitamin d. I haven't seen the sun for a full 7 days so I'm sure it would do some good. It has been raining for a week straight. You think I'm kidding, but I'm not. It's like a waterfall out there. I finally caved and bought galoshes. I need a good plastic poncho. My raincoats are no longer waterproof and are starting to smell like mildew. Nothing ever fully dries here. It's really a blessing that my family has a dryer. They are one of the few families that has one and even then, they are in the minority because they actually use it. Dryers are a miracle invention. Much love goes out to whoever thought that one up.
I've been thinking about how I'll never be back in my home for the holidays. For those of you who don't know, my parents sold the house that I've lived in all my life. I've never moved before and it weirds me out to think that I'll never spend another Christmas morning lounging on the couch, sipping hot chocolate and eating mandarins and panettone like we've done every year since I can remember. Sure, it'll happen again, but it will never be in my childhood home. What has come from all this depressing yet delightful reminiscing, is an idea to make Thanksgiving absolutely grand here. I already want to begin planning my menu because I want to gather all the best recipes. I don't want to miss a thing, and I want it to be doable. For that reason, planning begins now. "Why Thanksgiving and not Christmas?", you may be asking. Well, there's a logical answer. Nate and Calle leave December 11th so I'll be the only volunteer here at that time so it'll be more fun to live up Thanksgiving with my fellow estadounidenses. Wish us luck!

It's about time

2011-10-17T23:14:00.001+02:00

All good blogs contain photos. Mine has been severely lacking in this department. It's time to remedy this. Here's the first installment of my favorites from August 13 - Sept 14.

After a long day of amusement

Mamon chino!!!!

Sofia, my little sister

Kinders

"Gata fea!"

Johan, Johán, Fernando, Esteban

Every inch of me was soaked, head to toe.

Frozen, peanut-butter pie...Yum!

Sofia (on her 4th birthday) and Nicole

If you met Valeria, you'd know why this picture perfectly embodies her. =]

Nate and Aniela

Fernando (5), pouting when he only got 3 candies from the piñata