Fighting with Writing

Blogstop Book Tour

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 20:30:00 +0000

This post is part of the wonderful initiative, the blogstop book tour. You can find out more about it here...http://blogstopbooktours.wordpress.com/

The Smart One, by Ellen Meister is a novel that follows the story of Bev, a 35 year old woman from Long Island. She has just finished obtaining the qualifications necessary to become a teacher, but is not yet sure whether she should take a job on the other side of the country.

As a favour to her parents (who are holed up in Florida after a minor accident) Bev is staying in the family home over the summer. She is there to help sell the house next door. While preparing the house for sale, a startling discovery is made in an industrial drum being stored underneath the house. There’s been a murder!

I was puzzled a little after the body is discovered, and we begin to follow the characters in their day to day lives again. I wasn’t too sure about this at first, as I thought it may have been slowing the pace.

It all began to make sense though, as it soon becomes evident that this is not simply a book about a murder and how it gets solved. It is a book about the interaction between some rich and complex characters, where there just so happens to have been a murder taken place. We follow the relationships that Bev has with her two sisters and with the (now fully grown) boy who used to live next door.

Faulty assumptions seem to be a theme that runs throughout the book. Bev, the eponymous ‘smart one’ among her sisters, often gets the wrong end of the stick, allowing for some twists and turns in the tale.
Also, the author encourages the reader to make a few false assumptions of our own. I can’t say anything more about this or it really would spoil things.

Heated scenes between characters are told mainly through dialogue. This works really well in some places, and less so in others.
A confrontation between Bev and her older Sister was in danger of resembling a soap opera at one point. On the other hand, there’s a scene with the murder suspect, his wife, his son and Bev in a car. Here, the dialogue is absolutely spot on, making for an exciting ride.

If I had to pick one part of the book that I really thought did not work at all, I would point to a scene in a restaurant with David Letterman. There are some very funny parts in book, there are some hauntingly tragic parts; this was neither.
I found the gag too obvious, too contrived, and more importantly, the characters reactions to what transpired unrealistic. (Sorry I can't be more constructive in this criticism without revealing what happens.)

That one scene didn’t spoil my overall enjoyment though. I thought the entire book very well written, and Ellen Meister’s first book, Secret Confessions of the Applewood PTA is now jostling for position on my to be read pile.

Thanks for reading this review. If you'd like to see some more, check out the next stop on the blogstop tour at Book Room Reviews on Wednesday.

Want to get your hands on a copy? : If you'd like my copy of The Smart One, it will be going onto BookMooch at 9am tomorrow morning (UK time)

Vocabulary Quiz 009

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 01:11:00 +0000

After too long a break, the vocabulary quiz is back!

Today, the words are all taken from a book I won in a competition last week... A Clockwork Apple by Belinda Webb.

I was feeling a little glum that I'm starting my degree the year after my younger brother finished his. I am encouraged after reading on A Clockwork Apple's about the author blurb that Belinda Webb didn't start her English degree until the age of 30. I'm still a spring chicken at 26, and feeling glum is daft.

The book is kind of like a remake of A Clockwork Orange. (I'll confess to not having read the Anthony Burgess novel, but of course I have seen the Stanley Kubrick film version.)
In A Clockwork Apple the main character (Alex, short for Alexandra) and the rest of her gang are all female.

You can get your hands on A Clockwork Apple from Beautiful Books. (This isn't an affilate link or anything, I'm not that clever.)

The author's "linguistic inventiveness" caused me one or two problems. I wasn't sure which of the unfamiliar words were bone-fide, and which were a result of the aforementioned creativity.

You can rest assured, the following five words I have chosen all appear in the concise edition of the OED.

The Quiz

1. Ontology

I think, therefore I am an ontologist.

2. Sisyphean

Where Mick Jagger and Greek mythology cross paths.

3. Hagiography

An obsequious person may pen such a book

4. Rhadamanthine

At the opening ceremony in Beijing, after some lady swore an oath on behalf of all the athletes, a gentleman did something similar on behalf of another group of people.
I'm not sure what the Chinese word for rhadamanthine is, but he may have used it.

5. Omphalos

The word used in the book was omphaloskepsis, and the glossary at the rear gives the definition as "navel-gazing"

The answers are in the comments section.

My score is 0/5.
Spellcheck on MS Word scored 2/5.
How did you do?

Good Post Today.

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 01:07:00 +0000

By that title I don't meant that this is an exceptional blog entry I'm going to write, such a distinction would not be for me to judge. I simply mean that I was very happy with the three things that my postman brought me this morning.

BookMooch books.

The first of the books that I had mooched have began to arrive already. Cheap thrills aplenty as I held in my hand the physical reality of a mooched book. Mwahahaha

Competition book.

I got tuned into Rat's Reading the other day, and spent a pleasant enough half hour following the links there, and entering lots of competitions to win books.
I had no idea I had won one of them until the prize came through the letterbox today.

I still don't know what blog it was I won the book via. (I really was such a shameless competition whore that day.)
The book in question is A Clockwork Apple by Belinda Web. If anyone knows where it might be from, do let me know so I can pass on my appreciation.

Last but not least... the letter.

A letter came through offering me a place at University next month. No, not to fill the janitor vacancy thankyou very much, I'm off to study for an English degree.

I wasn't 100% sure they were going to accept me until now, so I'm mightily chuffed. I am to attend an institute of higher learning. Perhaps one day I will stop using words like 'mightily'.

The main thing is I can stop dossing and my life can take a meaningful direction. (Or at least it can after I've dossed about for another four years as a student... yay.)

24 hours on BookMooch

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 22:47:00 +0000

I started using BookMooch last night, a site for swapping your old books with other users that works on a points system.

To mooch a book is to have somebody gift it to you. Mooching a book will cost you one point, or two points if you mooch it from a user in a different country.
The person sending the book pays for the postage. In return they receive two points (or three if they are sending from overseas.)

The other way to obtain points is to upload onto the site a list of books that you are willing to give away. I had around 60 books that were just collecting dust on my shelf, so last night I took a couple of hours and uploaded the whole lot. (It took time because I left an individual note with each one describing its condition.)

That earned me six points, so I went about to find a few books to mooch. The system won't let you mooch more than one before you actually give some away though. Fair is fair.

Off to the land of nod I went then, wondering how long it would be before somebody wanted one of my books and I could start mooching again. I was very surprised to wake up in the morning to find that 12 of my books had been requested.

I popped them all in the post this afternoon, and it cost me just over £30. I was not expecting that.

To be fair to BookMooch though, you do not have to mail the books straight away like I did. If you have too many at a time, there is the option to tell people they will have to wait a few weeks.
You can even refuse to send a book altogether, but to do so without a valid reason is considered against the sites ethos and doing it too many times will badly affect your statistics.

There is no obligation to ship overseas if you just want to keep things domestic. This would help to keep the costs down.

Also, there is no need to do as I did and upload a list of 60 books straight away. I'd say a reasonable start on BookMooch could be possible by just offering up 10-20 books initially.

The good news was that I had over 30 points in my account now, and was free to mooch away to my heart’s content. I had paid my dues at the post office, and was now ready to reap the benefits.

From the buzz that I have seen about BookMooch, a lot of people are turned off because they are unable to find the books they want. I understand that complaint, Amazon.com this is certainly not, so if you are looking for just one or two specific books, you may be disappointed.

That doesn't bother me though. It's a big wide world; there are probably thousands of books out there that I wouldn't mind reading. A little browsing and I was finding plenty of ways to spend my points. Fifteen books are now on their way to me from six different countries (or seven if you count Wales, cheers Catherine, please don't let Ken know my address.)

The other function I've been making use of is the wish list. I register an interest in a book, and if somebody uploads it at some point in the future, an e-mail is sent to me telling me that it has become available for mooching.
I have around 70 titles in my wish list now, I'll see if I have any success in mooching one or two of them over the next few weeks.

All in all, I'm excited about BookMooch. I think it has a lot of potential to grow. The point system is its main advantage over other book swapping options. You can get rid of books without an obligation to get new ones then and there. You don't have to swap directly with someone who may not have anything that you're interested in.

I imagine the social side of things could be big too. Who better to discuss the book you've just mooched than the person you mooched it from?
I think my main gripe on Day One is that I can't get their forum to load. I'm curious to take a look and see what the craic is there.

Tndng B*r

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 02:46:00 +0000

This blog post is inspired by a recent anecdote posted on the blog of Entrecard's favourite raconteur, Ken Armstrong.

In the comments section, the hero of the story tells us how he was a pretty decent keeper of bar despite not being able to put on many flamboyant exhibitions of mixology.

I'm lacking a little severity in dexterity myself (I'm a clumsy bugger), and I would tend to concur that this is not as important as other qualities when it comes to what constitutes a good barman. (At least not in my little world.)

At the top of my list is possessing the ability to communicate with incomplete information. This can typically take on the following forms.

1. Verbosity

You have to be able shout "OI" as loud as possible. You must turn the head of the deaf drunk, and make him instantly understand the meaning of your one syllable message; standing on the tables is naughty.

Park keepers could make reasonable barmen. Keep off the grass.

2. Telephone Skills

Somebody wants a taxi; the band is playing.

The sticking of the finger into the opposite ear doesn't always work. You must order the car for "Big Jim" by just shouting into the phone and assuming they can hear you in the control room.

Tell Big Jim it'll be 15 minutes. You have no idea but it sounds about right.

3. Lip-reading

It’s not too difficult with a bit of practise. You just need to remember to run what you think they've just said past a common sense control centre in your brain.

A gin and diet coke is not an everyday combination; they probably want a tin of diet coke.

4. Generic phrases

Lastly, and probably the most important as it can be applied not just when the bar is noisy, but also when the punters are sloshed (which will be most of the time.) The good barman must be able to make polite conversation with someone who is gibbering incoherently.
Having no earthly idea what the hell a regular is slurring at you at one in the morning is no excuse for displaying a lack of empathy.

Have a few stock phrases to hand that will fit into almost any situation. Experience in reading the tone of the babbler will guide you as to which one to use.

They can range from the basic...

- "Well, this is it" - with optional shoulder shrug.
- "Really" - with optional eyebrow raising.
- "What can you do?" - compulsory shrug.
- "Is that right" - followed by optional pursed-lip inhaling.

To the intermediate...

- "Brilliant, I've got to write that one down"
optional clicking your fingers followed by compulsory pointing, smiling and finger wag.

- "Some people eh?"
compulsory shake of the head and optional tut.

- "They don't make them like they used to"
wiggle your toes and clap your hands (ok, maybe not, but you're getting the idea)

Once you've got all this down, we can move onto the advanced. There's a bitter middle-aged woman who sits at the end of the bar and knocks back a dozen white wine sodas every night. You're never going to understand a single word she says, but this doesn't necessarily mean that she's not going to remember you in her will.

"It's his loss" and "ungrateful little brats" are always good to go with, but flap your wings try out some of your own.

Know the golden rule; if the stock phrases ever go wrong and the punter looks at you as if to demand an explanation, then it is time to turn the tables and mutter something intelligible right back at them.

Include just the right amount of gesticulation, and you will find them nodding their head in sudden understanding and gazing upon you, the quintessential barman, as if you were some sort of modern day Confucius.

Book Review - Fire in the East

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 18:08:00 +0000

I was halfway through reading Don Quixote and finding it a little heavy going, The Servantes epic was accidentally/on purpose left out of my bag as I left for work the other day. I couldn’t be out and about and bookless, so a visit to Waterstones was in order.

Torn between many pretty looking titles, I eventually settled on Fire in the East by Harry Sidebottom.

My decision to purchase this particular book was swayed by the sticker they had slapped on the front cover, “Perfect for fans of Conn Iggulden”

A fan of Iggulden I most certainly am, and if the marketing people are trying so hard to sell me this book that stickers are going to come into the equation, then who am I to get in the way of such a process? It got bought.

Sidebottom has set his story in the third century AD. My understanding is that this is around about the time when the Roman Empire is beginning to go tits up.

The city of Arete, on the banks of the Euphrates River, is currently the Eastern extreme of Roman influence. This could be about to change as an attack is expected the following year by a horde of Sassanid Persians. Fire in The East follows the journey of Marcus Clodius Ballista, a former barbarian come Roman military officer, who has just been appointed as the commander in charge of the city’s defence.

I was not too impressed with the first half of the book. The intrigue, I didn’t find too intriguing, and the engagement, I didn’t find too engaging. The comic moments provided no relief; I don’t think my sense of humour was ever aroused to the point of laughing out loud.

I felt there were too many characters for my tiny mind to keep up with. There’s a very helpful list of characters appendix at the end of the book, but as I’m a very linear chap who reads from left to right, I didn’t know it was there until it was too late.

It’s not all bad though, the book really came into its own as soon as those pesky Persians arrive. In some quite exciting battle sequences, the author explores the process of siege warfare, and the use of various types of siege equipment, in a surprising amount of depth. The detail given in no way gets in the way of the narrative’s pace; I was glued to my seat and finished the second half of the book in one sitting.

So what did I think overall? “PART ONE” can be seen written in quite a prominent place on the dust cover of this book, and subsequent volumes are referenced in the afterword. It is clear that follow up novels are to be released, but will I be interested?

The last ten or so pages of Fire in the East answered that question for me. The plot takes an unexpected turn at the last minute, and has left me eager to find out what will happen next.

Yes I will be reading Warrior of Rome, part two, soon after it comes out. This time, I’ll be wise to the location of any hidden lists of characters. That’ll be one thing less for me to gripe about.

How to be a hack (lesson one)

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 00:49:00 +0000

Before we start today, I just want to give a quick plug to the series, Your Online Writing Life: Protect Your Reputation — and Future over at Colloqium. You all owe her a debt of gratitude, as if it had not been for me reading those posts, I might be boring you all with the gory details of my personal situation.

So it’s all about the writing still, as it should be. I am happy to report that in this department, things are on the up!

My laptop and I are currently sharing a large oak table in a room where only the sound of the clacking keys break the silence. My chair promotes good posture; there is enough room for my knees to slot in underneath the table without obstruction. The fish are jumping; the cotton is high... so let’s get on with the blog.

In the last post, Majik was talking about writer’s block. Thankfully, with a backlog of ideas in my notebook, and a few rough drafts of stories that I wish to complete, finding inspiration is not currently my problem.

It is always a popular topic, lots of bloggers share their little tips and tricks as to how they conquer the blank page. Some use a writing prompt, others like to make fodder of news stories, some like to raid their personal diaries, they all sound like fair enough methods. Although I haven’t used any of them, I'm not opposed to trying one or two in the future. Even borrowing ideas from other people’s work seems to be legitimate (within reason of course.)

Yesterday though, I did come across one method that doesn’t sit right with me. In a book on writing short stories by a bloke called Iain Pattison, he suggests the following in a chapter on finding story ideas....

“It’s amazing how you can get a quirky new story idea from playing around with puns.

Quiche of Death – a sinister restaurant?

Son and Hair – a row over who is going to inherit the family barber shop?”

Eww

To be fair to the author, this idea is number 9 in a list of 10, so I doubt he holds too much stock by it. Even so, I found the very notion quite repugnant.

First and foremostly, it seems like a fast route to producing some very bad writing (or is that just me?)
Secondly, does it not take away from the very essence of a good pun? We conjure them up to feel smug and clever. Doing it backwards takes those elements away, so you’re not left with anything at all really. It’s not as if puns are funny, so what’s the point in producing them artificially like this?

I should explain that I am a big fan of puns, and appreciate coming across a good one. To me, this is sacrilege.

My world has been turned upside down, I shall now be suspicious that the newspaper reporter whose wit I am worshipping did not ingeniously fashion some words to fit a situation; rather he just thought of a quirky headline, and then went out to synthesize some semi-plausible news that would correspond.

So on that note, here are some short stories that I will definately not be writing.

Writer’s Cock – An erotic tale about an author who doesn’t get his latest book started because he spends too much time chasing the girls.

Beware of Geeks Bearing Gifts – A birthday present that a young lady receives from her computer programmer boyfriend leads to all sorts of unforeseen consequences.

A Cougher You Can’t Refuse - A member of an organised crime gang juggles his time between collecting protection money and taking his bronchitis medicine.

Would anyone like to share what stories they won't be writing?

Guest Blog – Majik’s Thoughts

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 09:44:00 +0000

It has been a fair chunk of time since my last confession father. I have been having issues with my personal computer.

David from Majik's Thoughts contacted me quite some time ago asking if he could guest blog on this site. I said yes, although previously guest blogging has been by invitation only. He is a very social blogger who works hard at what he does. I think he sent this to me about a month ago and it has been gathering dust in my e-mail inbox. Apologies to David for my tardiness.

Better late than never, Majik offers his thoughts on writer's block.

Fighting with Writers Block

Some of you have come to know me as Majik from Majik's Thoughts. I actually have three different blogs; Majik's World and Earn Online with Majik but I was inspired but the theme of Tam's blog and I approached Tam a little while ago because I had an idea for a guest post that I thought would be good for his blog "Fighting with Writing." Sticking with the theme of his block I have given my guest post the working title of "Fighting with Writer's Block" I thought it would emphasize some of the most important barriers to overcome when wanting to be a writer. Please enjoy.

One of the hardest things to do in any writing career, whether it is brief and ends after high school or if you continue on is dealing with the blank page. There have been many times when I have struggled to write something down and ended up getting frustrated by the blank page. The hardest part about writing is getting started; this is where the omnipotent writer's block comes into play. You could have a hundred and one ideas but get stuck by your opening sentence. You feel as though there is a great big brick wall in your way.

Sometimes you could stare at a blank page (or more so in recent times a blank word processor screen) and get lost in the emptiness. There have been a few tricks that I have used to overcome this problem. When I first started blogging I would have to surf through a lot of pages just to come up with an idea or a premise to write about. After I found the right topic that got me fired up the first sentence was just a note about how I came across the topic. Usually I ended up rewriting the first sentence about three times before the words could flow properly to get my point across. But there is an easier way.

Even the best writers occasionally run into a wall and have trouble getting past the empty spaces. The best way that I have found to overcome the dreaded writer's block is to think of something silly and write it down. Usually when you read something silly you'll get a chuckle and a few more ideas surrounding the subject, write those ones down. After you have taken a second look at the space you have just filled in; take a few moments to think about the context of the words you have written. Is there any potential in those sentences? Probably not, but you are no longer looking at a blank page.

When you have both sentences try to think of another sentence that will go with one of the two you have just written and you have the beginnings of an idea. Once you have the beginnings of an idea, all you have to do is follow it through. You may end up with silly sentences strung together but writing just for exercise will just give you more ideas and the starting point you are looking for will just hit you.

What writing application does this work for?

The above is an example of a writing exercise designed to help you get past the daunting task of starting any kind of story. The silly phrase that I had started with when I began writing a web-novel was "I am going to write something." It was not the funniest trick but it gives you something to write until you have one of those eureka moments and start actually writing.

What did I use this method for? Why is it such a good trick?

There is a simple answer to both questions. I have used this method to start my creative writing and not just my usual posts from my main blog. What I started with was actually the prologue to the web-novel I have been writing. The line is "…And let the saga begin…" and so far I have quite a bit written and is actually becoming longer than any work I have done previously.

The reason it is such a good trick is because it is exercise for your imagination. Every good writer has to use their imagination to weave wondrous tales that catch our attention and can hold it for a long time. These tales can have the power to make you not want to put a book down until you have finished reading it. I have come across at least one book that I could not put down until I was finished reading it. Imagination is the key to writing and using your imagination to fascinate and have your reader drawn right into your work is an achievement that all writers strive for.

Whether or not you choose to use this trick to break through the wall of your writer's block is up to you. But if it does work for you please let us know and create the next best seller!

Hope you enjoyed that. See you very soon hopefully for some more posts on fighting with writing.

Non non-fiction

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 21:46:00 +0000

The course suggests that writing non-fiction articles is one of the easiest ways to get your work published. I now understand why.

Producing the stuff is like filling in a mortgage application while sitting next to a smelly person on a long bumpy coach trip. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve downed tools, frustrated at my inability to produce something entertaining which also met the criteria.

Having some of my work in print is not that big a deal to me. I’ll admit it would be nice to point at a piece of writing and say, “I did that.” Not so good though, when the thing at which I am pointing is an article in a ladies magazine all about different types of carpet patterns.

“You did this Tam? It’s, erm, very informative.”

I’ll eat my vegetables, be nice to my sister, and brush my teeth, but I don’t think I’m going to write this article anytime soon. I’d rather turn this blog into a photo diary that explores the consequences of my digestion.

Don’t worry; I’m not going to do that (although if I did, Ken might still visit.) What I am going to do though, is skip straight to the parts of my course which pertain to writing fiction.

This represents a shift in priorities. It’s a crowded marketplace and I don’t expect to write something that will be published anytime soon. I’ll be happy though, after a long period without significant output, if I can write anything at all. I can always publish it on here.

City of Thieves

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 01:50:00 +0000

I was going to be on a train for a few hours on Monday morning. The library book I brought was not to my tastes (Wilbur Smith's The Quest = mystic tat) so I treated myself with a visit to the bookshop.

I was browsing the shelves for a few minutes when I noticed the book I was waiting for; David Benioff and his City of Thieves.

On amazon, it wasn't available untill Thursday. I assumed this was the UK release date, but evidently I'm wrong. (Perhaps Waterstones were selling it too early, and I just managed to get the bugger bought before the mistake was recognized. Yes, I think I'll go with that; it sounds more exciting and doesn't involve me being wrong.)

I've tried a stab at a review. If anybodys interested, they can find it here.

(My SEO guru preaches that google finds duplicate content displeasing. That's why I'm not posting it here. The link is to a historical fiction forum.)

Passing through Leningrad

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 01:38:00 +0000

I’m really getting into this reading book business at the moment. I’m going through volumes at a faster pace than any other time in my life. I figure doing the odd review is a good way to tie in a bit of writing; after all, we wouldn’t want to fall too far from the course of our ultimate remit.

The book I've chosen to tackle is City of Thieves, the new David Benioff, set in Leningrad during the siege and released on 26th June. Not being out yet, this gives me a bit of time to build up my knowledge on the subject.

I went all super-keen, and visited the library to borrow every book they had with the word Leningrad in the title; fiction and non-fiction. I also troubled them to order both of Benioff’s previous books from other libraries.

Two of the Leningrad books, the librarian had to go and dig out of a place called ‘reserve stock.’ She came back 15 minutes later with her cardigan all covered in dust; they must love it down at the library when they see me coming.

These forgotten tomes were last borrowed in 1966 and 1979. I remember thinking this was probably because they were both a bit kak.

I was proved wrong. One of them, a competently translated piece of Russian propaganda written in 1942 by Alexander Fadeyev, I found to be something of a lost gem. The original author was rather convincing in his storytelling. For a few short hours last week, he helped to transform me into an obedient little Stalinist.

I’m about half-way through my research now, with most of the self-proscribed reading list under my belt. I’ve still got to tackle 900 days by Harrison E. Salisbury. I’ve been saving it for last because it’s one of those ginormous books that crams about 500 words onto every one of its 600 pages.

If I get tired of straining my eyes, I can always take it easy by watching a few of Benioff’s movies. (He does screenplays as well does our Dave.)
Troy was one his, and I’ll be sure to watch The 25th Hour, if only for the smug moment where I can pompously announce – “the book were bettah.”

I’m genuinely excited about the release of City of Thieves. I don’t think that’s ever happened to me before, getting all wound up about a book. I’m enjoying myself though, so I’m pretty sure this won’t be the last time.

All I need to do now is convince myself that the readers of The Lady magazine would be interested in a non-fiction article about hungry Russians. That’s probably not going to happen, but I’m in no hurry.

Guest blog - Hunting the Muse

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 22:16:00 +0000

Another thing we haven't had here for quite some time is a guest blogger.

Brady Frost over at Hunting the Muse has stepped in to fill the breach. He's talking about personal rants, and if they have any part to play in good writing. Let's see what he has to say....

Hello! My name is Brady Frost from HuntingtheMuse.com. This is the first of what may become a string of periodic guest posts that I will be giving Tam for use at his discretion while he works on his writing projects and deals with some personal issues that have cropped up as of late. Tam first asked me to put together a guest post for him back in April, I believe. I guess you could say that I've been 'Fighting with Writing' lately, too.

To be honest, I haven't really given my own blog as much attention as I used to and find that some posts are an exercise of slogging through the fog in my brain more than dishing out the creative banter that I would like to post. Why is that?

How can it be hard to sit down and actually write for people who not only love to write, but feel compelled to do so? It's times like these when those of us with the best intentions feel the ever encroachment of real life on our writing domain. Long days at work, fights with our spouse, a growing annoyance at our children's seemingly endless string of thoughtless acts... they all add up and take their toll. It's easy to get frustrated when your children seem to think that their mother lives to clean up their messes, or the boss thinks that a complex operation should only take a few hours to accomplish, or the ol' wife doesn't appreciate the fact that the only thing you want for Father's Day is the pasta roller she's wanted for ages... Writing is supposed to be a release though, right? Us writers can just sit down and write stories and vent and the world suddenly becomes better, right? Ah, the value of self expression... Well, unfortunately life isn't always that sweet. Sometimes we create the arguments, sometimes kids are just kids, sometimes... well, okay you got me there, work always sucks.

I recently quit reading a book that seemed to have a decent start simply because the author put too much of her own life into the story. Honestly, I care about the characters, not about the family argument you had last week and figured you'd throw in. It wasn't inspiring, it wasn't part of the story, and I didn't just pay five dollars for your book so that I could feel like your therapist. So there you have it.
Before I was a writer I was a reader. I have much more experience reading than I do writing, in fact, I have a long list of reading credentials but I'm sorry to admit that I've only had one rejection slip that I can specifically remember. If I had any sense at the time I would have kept it, but life's unfortunate in that we seldom recognize the value of our failures while the pain from their sting still lingers. All things considered, writing for publication and venting is a mix that very few can master. Like the family argument in the book I stopped reading, our venting is often uninteresting to our readers and yet some authors feel that undying need to vent. You can tell they are emotionally attached because the level of detail differs from that of the rest of the story. They are so immersed in their memory of what actually happened that they forget to treat the rest of their 'fiction' the same way.

I suppose this is why I choose writing as a form of escape, and to fully escape I must rid myself of the mind-clutter of my worries and the interruptions of life. If I am unsuccessful in making that separation, my writing suffers. Though I try to slog onward, my output is not of the same quality that I might expect. Expectations can kill writing. Self-expectations can be more deadly than any other; I would attribute the vast majority of my writer's block to being unhappy with what I have recently written. But the fact remains, unless you keep writing you cannot expect for your output to get any better. This is why they invented the re-write.

So let's recap, there had to be something worth discussing in all that.

1. Don't vent in your writing. Write because you love to write, not because you want someone to listen. Don't be afraid to use your life experiences as material, just don't write about something and send it off to the world while you are still passionate about it. If you feel you must, run it through a good filtration process of critiques to make sure you are focusing on the right aspects of the writing.

2. Don't stop writing. If you can't keep life out of your mind while you are trying to write, take a moment to get your thoughts straight and try again. If you have to move on to another scene, do it. You can always come back to what you're working on. The important part is to write something. Even if you are unhappy with what is coming out, you can always reread it in a few days and see if there is anything worth salvaging. You never know what ideas you may uncover to use later. And who knows, maybe you are looking at things through funk-colored lenses and you'll see your true genius once you've stepped away from it for a while.

_______________________________________________________

Hats off to Brady. Some good advice in there.

I think I'm going to try and take some of it on board. Maybe I'll scribble a few things about my experiences in the last few weeks, and then bury them in a box for six months, see if there's anything salvageable.

I'll do it just now in fact, instead of writing a blog entry. (Brady's done that for me today...cheers again!)

Vocabulary Quiz 008

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 17:27:00 +0000

It's been a while since I've done one of these; so I'll run over the rules again quickly.

I list words that, until recently, were unfamiliar to me. You see how many where you know the definitions.

Today, all the words are from Jim Murdoch's book, Living with the Truth.

If you've not read it, I'm assuming you've at least bought it and it is waiting patiently in your to be read pile. If this is not the case, you can rectify the situation at this world wide webpage.

Odontophobia

Fear of Odonts

Bonhomie

Some people are only bonhomie at certain times of day.

Misanthropic

If the Whos from Whoville were human, a certain troglodyte would have misanthropic tendencies.

Soliloquy

To be,
or not to be;
is an example of
a soliloquy

Piscatorial

The answer is in the stars.

Good luck, and let us know how you did in the comment section. (Where incidentally, you can find the answers.)
The score to beat is 0/5.

Free Coke for Goths

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:34:00 +0000

A quick story first, that I hope will serve as further proof that I’m in a good mood and doing ok.

Working away in the shop one evening, we hadn’t had a customer in a while when a girl walks in. She was all dressed in black, with a thick layer of white make-up on her face.

She asks for a Diet Coke.

I quickly prepare the drink and present it to her with a flourish announcing, “There you go, free coke for Goths.”

“I’m not a Goth.” She protested.

“Very well, I replied, that’ll be £1.19 then”

So where are we with this writing course then? Are we still doing the course? What assignment were we on? It all seems so long ago.

A brief look at the direct debits coming out of the ol’ bank account would suggest yes; we are still doing this writing course.

Evidently, I’ve gotten kind of sidetracked. I’d like to finish assignment two, and to do that effectively, I think I need to start all over again.

I enjoyed the cleaning thing, but it wasn’t really what they were asking for. The non-fiction article they want is not about imparting advice or anything like that.
They are just looking for cold hard facts... Did you know.... x, y and z.

The publication I’m going to choose to analyze for my second swing is The Lady. They seem to publish a lot of freelancer’s non-fiction stuff.
One of the example articles the course gives for this assignment was published in The Lady, so choosing it is a bit of a cheat, but at least I’m sure that I’m headed in the right direction.

I have no idea yet as to what subject I’ll choose, but I figure I can spend time tomorrow morning browsing the reference section of the library and inspiration will strike.

Advice for Insomniacs

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 18:25:00 +0000

Sometimes when you are lying awake in your bed at night, it can be rather tricky to make that final descent into the land of nod. On these occasions, it can be quite useful to have written down next to the bed, a list of things that you can do to honour Hypnos, the god of sleep.

My list looks something like this...

1. Slip into a pair of trousers. The types favoured by Hypnos are woven of the denim fabric and bear the mark of at least a couple of days in the field.

2. Locate an altar that has been fashioned from the wood of the mahogany tree. A regular stone or marble altar will not suffice, as only the mahogany altars house the accoutrements that you will need to appease Hypnos.

3. Attract the attention of the celebrant on the other side of the altar, and point at one of the runes which are displayed.

4. Watch with reverence as the celebrant opens a tap, and fills a chalice from the pipe that corresponds to the rune you chose.

5. Open your throat and imbibe the contents of this chalice as fast as possible. Drinking too slowly will anger Hypnos and incur his wrath.

6. Repeat steps 3, 4 and 5 until your state of enlightenment is sufficient enough as to make the completion of step 7 possible.

7. You must partake of the ritualistic dancing that pleases Hypnos so. Point with your fingers as much as possible, ignore the rhythm of the music and have no fear of invading the personal space of infidels.

8. Repeat steps 3, 4 and 5 until you achieve a state of complete cognitive abstinence.

9. The private parts of a sacrificial lamb must be consumed; within a pita bread, covered in chilli sauce. Sing hymns unto Hypnos, but make sure you don’t get any of the words correct or he will consider your praise insincere.

10. Finally, join the mass exodus to the chariot rank. Be sure to decorate the vehicle on your way home, where the rewards of the evening’s devotion will await you.

News

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 22:58:00 +0000

I try not to blog too much about my personal life, but figure it's ok to mention major events.

My wife and I are now seperated, and I have moved up to live in Aberdeen.

Parts of this suck, but it is for the best.

See you tomorrow, for buisness as usual.

I've been busy.

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Wed, 21 May 2008 23:43:00 +0000

Resolving some personal issues has led me to neglect my blog somewhat in recent weeks. Posting may be infrequent for a while still, but I will try to add something at least once a week till I'm back on track.

This week, please take a moment to check out Sharp Words where I have left a little guest blog.

See you soon hopefully.

Tam

Chiropodocracy

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Tue, 13 May 2008 22:52:00 +0000

I have misplaced my little bookie that I was making notes in for this weeks vocabulary quiz. I'm pretty sure it's in the bedroom somewhere, but to find it might require a noisy rummage, and little Mollypops is asleep.

No matter, the quiz can come tomorrow. Today, I've made up my own word instead.....Chiropodocracy.

The first thing on the agenda is, of course, to google chiropodocracy, and see if the word exists already.

That's exactly the page you want to see. So much nicer than when you want to name your band Origin of the Faeces but learn that someone has beat you to it.

Next up, I have to choose a definition. Here is the shortlist.

1.A society that is ruled by whomever has the largest feet.

In the entire history of human anthropology, there have been no recorded instances of a people who choose their leader by measuring podiatric girth. This will not stop me; I firmly believe chiropodocracy is a cool sounding word, so we will move onto definition two.

2. A society that is ruled by whomever has the smallest feet.

Very similar to the first definition, and we may experience similar problems to it in terms of lack of demand for such a word.

Unless that is, we consider the world of Cinderella.

She was chosen to marry a Prince based on the fact that she had the tiniest feet in all the kingdom. She's not exactly the leader, but she must have some kind of clout, all due to her little little piggies.

3. A society ruled by foot doctors.

This might be the winner for me.

When the oil runs out, war erupts all around the planet, almost everything is destroyed.

A new society springs from the ashes of the old one. A spirit of co-operation exists among the survivors, and those who are most valuable rise to lead.

Technology as we know it has all but disappeared, and in any case, no fuel is available. In order to travel, people have to revert to walking again; from village to village, and from country to country.

The guys who can treat all the blisters get the crowns.

I can see this happening, and when it does, as soon as google comes back online, my blog will rank number one for Chiropodocracy!

Saturday Sink - 007

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Sat, 10 May 2008 23:08:00 +0000

I think it's about time I faced up to the fact that I just can't keep up with an ambitious blogging schedule. That's ok, I tell myself, we live and learn.

So long as I find my pace eventually, and keep slugging along when I do.

New plan....

- Tuesday for the vocabulary.

- Saturday for the sink.

- Any other post about writing, or a piece of writing, whenever the wife lets me. Hopefully at least one a week.

- Guest bloggers where I can get them, maybe once a month, maybe more, maybe less.

I'll not restrict myself to recommending a blog in the sink either. We had a book the other day, this week is a website, next week, it might be a fibrous breakfast cereal that doesn't taste like soggy kindling. (Although I doubt it, such a thing does not exist.)

On to the sink proper then... I want to tell you about a great website called TED that a friend put me onto.

TED stands for Technology Entertainment Design, and is an annual conference where people give short lectures on a wide range of topics.

A collection of some of the best of these lectures are available to view at the website www.ted.com.

I like a good lecture, at least now I do, my attendance record at University could hardly attest to this always being the case.
Of particular interest to me is their Words about Words category.

A word of warning, The Dave Eggers and Isabel Allende videos may make you want to shed your worldly possessions, and take up arms as a militant feminist English tutor.

If you can avoid such temptations, then this site is definitely worth a look.

Vocabulary Quiz - 007

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Tue, 06 May 2008 23:38:00 +0000

Today, I'd like to point you towards a video as part of the vocabulary quiz.

It's about 16 minutes long, but will be of interest to anyone who likes their words.
In fact, all this week's answers can be found in the video. (So you might want to have a bosch at the quiz before you watch.)

Tried unsuccessfully to embed the video, I'm just going to link to it instead.

For those who don't want to watch the video, don't worry, the answers are still in the comments.

1. Erinaceous

Dennis the Menace has an erinaceous haircut

2. Lexicography

Samuel J

3. Serendipity

"I'm feeling lucky"

4.Polysemy

It's a word about words, and you know what poly means.

5. Synecdoche

I got myself a new set of wheels.

Links to previous weeks...

001
002
003
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005
006

Assignments completed : 1/30

Saturday Sink - 006

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Sat, 03 May 2008 20:34:00 +0000

As you can see, the dishes have gone unwashed. (busy busy...sorry)

Back next week.

Guest Blogger - Aywren's Figpress

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Thu, 01 May 2008 00:41:00 +0000

Please welcome Aywren from Figress to this week's guest blogging slot. We're very happy to have her, so without further ado....

Touched by Creation

Written by Aywren

Figpress
Wayfarer Wings

I don’t remember a time in my life that wasn’t touched by creation.

When I was very young, there was the big three: reading, writing and art. I read everything I could get my hands on. And when I was done with that, I would rush off on an inspiration high, filled with other people’s magical words, and create my own. I would fold sheets of wide rule notebook paper in half, glue it down the middle and write and illustrate my own hand-made books.
As a child, you don’t question creation. You simply do it. You don’t reach for inspiration. It’s simply there. The words may have been simpler and rougher around the edges… but the love of creativity was never more pure and unblemished by thoughts of the world. I think there’s still a lot we can learn from the creativity of children.

But there comes a day when child creativity becomes adult creativity and you find yourself in a world where writing suddenly means wordcount, editing, deadlines, cost-per-word or cost-per hour. Copywriting? Freelancing? Technical writing? Materials development?

Where did all this come from? And when did it get to be so difficult to jot down even a few sentences on a page?

I guess I’ll never really figure out the point of transition. I just know that I was a college student who earned a full degree in professional writing. So there I have it. A piece of paper on the wall that officially states that “I R Wrighter.” A professional job in which grant writing, technical writing, material development and PR are the daily chores.

But is this what it really means to be a writer? Is this what I would consider my greatest accomplishment (although I can say it’s probably the one thing I’ve worked hardest to earn)?

No… for me, I still reach back to the simplicity of a time touched by creation. And the true love of the craft that I feel when I find myself on that inspiration high, writing fiction… with no other purpose but the love of writing for a group net of friends who (for some odd reason) seem to enjoy reading it.

Every year for the past six years, I’ve taken a part in the online writer’s challenge called National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). The goal of this month is for writers to write 50,000 words in 30 days – a rough equivalent of a short novel. Even if you’re not a novelist, if you’ve never heard of this before, I highly encourage you to give it a thought this November. You can find the website at http://www.nanowrimo.org.

It was during a writing slump in my life that I decided to go out on a limb and attempt my first NaNoWriMo. I had heard other people talking about it and had passed it off as crazy. If I couldn’t write a few paragraphs on my own, how could I think of taking on a writer’s challenge to finish 50K words in 30 days?
Nuts!

I must have been feeling reckless that day, though. I had no preparation -- not like some of the writers who has spent all October shoving other real life activities from their lists just to be able to write during November. I signed up on November 1st and I sat down to write.
I’m so glad that I did.

The challenge was tough. I was starting from scratch writing a world and characters I hardly knew. There were days where the writing well was dry, but I had to force myself to write anyhow. I learned about making progress one painful word at a time, no matter what distractions bombarded my mind. I learned about living with rough drafts, ignoring the backspace key and the power of promising myself a strong edit on the flipside.

I rediscovered what it felt like to free-write without constraints. I learned the joy of hearing my characters introduce themselves, speak to me and unfold their life stories. I learned how to step out of the way and watch them carry away my story, taking it in directions I would have never imagined were possible.

I walked into the challenge with no real plot. No outline. No solid characters. And I walked out of it with 50K+ words, a brand new world and a story that I’ve continued to write every November.
I think my biggest accomplishment was printing out that NaNoWriMo certificate that said I had completed a goal that I thought was impossible. That was the day that I felt like a real writer. I had set my goals. Planned my time. Organized myself. And I had achieved.

Sure, it’s not a published work. I’ve still yet to hold any hard copy of my writing in paperback form. But I’ve begun to learn as a writer that accomplishment isn’t always about physical things… or even praise and attention from others. A writer can’t always be measured by what has been published, as great an accomplishment as publishing is for any writer.

Growing internally as a writer may be far more important than any of this. And growth doesn’t always result in tangible changes for us to point to. It comes from learning and re-learning the things that we may have forgotten from a simpler time in our lives. It comes from discovering passion for our craft and learning how to balance that with the motivation, goals and organization that can carry us through to the end of our work.

I’ve also learned the value of good writing friends. People who really love your work and your characters almost as much as you do. People who you can trust to edit with an honest opinion and brainstorm without laughing at all of your off the wall plot suggestions. These are rare friends – I know how blessed I am to have mine. When you find people like that, hold on to them and don’t forget to tell them how much you appreciate their understanding and support.

I feel that writers have both a wonderful gift and a great burden. Amidst the ever-growing demands and clutter of life, we are charged with the task of helping the human race make sense of it all. We sometimes struggle with an existence that is touched with creation… and in turn, are compelled to reach out to others to share that experience. Even though it doesn’t always feel like it, our task is so much more important than we can begin to understand.
Afterall, if writers don’t write… who will?

The epic NaNoWriMo work in question, Dreigiau, can be found here.
I haven't been asked to plug it, but I want to.
A fair number of people seem to be a fan of the Dreigau series. I'm pleased to report that in the last week, that number has grown by at least one.

Vocabulary Quiz - 006

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 21:47:00 +0000

Todays quintet of dodgy words all come from the book I'm reading at the moment, Magician by Raymond E Feist.

I'm not usually a fantasy man, but tomorrow's guest blogger, from Figpress, inspired me to give it a try.

I think it might be an easy week for some of you. As always though, I got 0/5.
See if you can beat me!

1. Axiomatic

Sometimes, no clue is necessary.

2. Troubador

Also, a confectionary item.

3. Vacilate

Michael Buble riding a chocolate chariot

4. Ineffable

One of the charcters in Harry Potter was ineffable.

5. Capricious

BOO!

Answers are in the comments.

Links to previous weeks...

001
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005

Assignments completed : 1/30

Saturday Sink - 005

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Sat, 26 Apr 2008 06:20:00 +0000

I'm doing things a little differently in this week's Saturday Sink. Rather than the usual link love about someone else’s blog, I'm going to tell you about a book instead.

For me, a good book is simply one that takes me on a journey, and doesn’t piss me off too much along the way. The number one thing that will annoy me is if a character is simply not plausible.

I'm inclined to go along with any series of fantastic events, whilst suspending my disbelief, if the characters themselves are believable.

It's difficult for me to describe, but if a character does too much, if they possess one hundred good traits and zero bad ones, the character no longer exists as being real in my head, and my whole experience of reading the book can fall apart very quickly.

Inspired by the Phantom Menace, I call this the Anakin Skywalker Syndrome (ASS). You may be able to race pods, build droids, wink at princesses and grow as many mitochlorians in your underpants as you like, but you don't really exist and never will, even in my imagination.

If anyone has read last year's Dawn of Empire by Sam Barone, the slave girl Trella is a perfect example of one who suffers from ASS.
Despite her youthful age, she quickly becomes everything to everybody in the story. The hero, Eskkar, seems to soar over all hurdles placed before him, just because his young lover Trella has anticipated all problems beforehand and advised him of how best to act.
Rather than existing in my imagination as a real person, Trella became just a tool to neaten up the narrative. The author briefly tries to explain her numerous abilities, charisma and clairvoyant-like insight, but a quick mention that she had a bit of special schooling before being enslaved didn’t quite sell it to me.

Now I’ve got that out off my chest, I can go on to talk about this book, a debut novel by Russell Whitfield called Gladiatrix.

I've been keen on the historical fiction genre since I read Conn Iggulden's Wolf of the Plains last year. I picked Gladiatrix off the shelf at Waterstones the other day because ancient Rome is currently my era of choice, and this book had one of those friendly 3 for the price of 2 stickers on it's cover.

Almost immediately, I was worried that the main character of the book, Lysandra, was going to have an acute case of ASS.
Like Trella, Lysandra is a young woman with a special education that has happened upon the bondage of slavery through a recent spat of misfortune.
Unlike Trella (a supprting character), Lysandra is the main focus of Gladiatrix. If I didn’t believe in her, the book would have no chance to redeem itself.

Thankfully, it became quickly evident this was not the case. The Spartan Priestess turned slave turned Gladiatrix, Lysandra, has lots and lots of beautiful flaws.

First and foremost, her arrogance seems to offend all those that she encounters. She deludes herself that she is somehow better than everybody else, almost untouchable. She clings to this belief, even though the odd chunk gets taken out of her in almost every scrap.

Then there’s her naivety, with some characters in the story able to manipulate her to do their own bidding. An infallible Trella would have sussed what was going on immediately, and those seeking to pull her strings would be dead by the end of the chapter. With Lysandra, it’s far more believable, sometimes we are oblivious to the puppet masters.

Lysandra is still a likeable character of course, she has her redeemable qualities. I’ve waffled on for long enough though, you’ll just have to read the book to find out what they are.

I would whole heartedly recommend Gladiatrix, it is a good read. (Although not really suitable for younger readers)
The author is nice chap, replied to my e-mail and stopped by the blog so he did. That sort of thing always wins you a point or two in my estimation. I do hope he isn’t too focused on his web presence though, sequels don’t write themselves you know.

Vocabulary Quiz - 005

noreply@blogger.com (Tam) — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 22:27:00 +0000

Five weeks of this already, where does the time go?

A brief explanation for those who have missed the first four.

Here are five words I've run into this week, where I was unsure of the meaning and I had to look them up. See how many you know off the top of your head.
Let us know how you did. My score is always 0/5, so there's no shame in this game.

There's a wee clue under each word to help you out.

1. Detritus

Only £1.58 for a 22kg bag down at B&Q

2. Retinue

The more retinues you have, the more parking space you will need.

3. Trinomen

The Duchess of Cornwall has one.

4. Effete

My hard drive

5. Glib

A choice between broth and cod for wee Alan?

Answers are in the comments. Hope you enjoy.

Links to previous weeks...

001
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Assignments completed : 1/30