Because Emily Says So

The whitest thing that's ever happened?

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 19:06:00 +0000

Yesterday Zach and Julie got married (hooray!), and during the reception, I witnessed a dance off.

A Wisconsin versus Minnesota dance off.

To "Bust a Move."

With each team consisting of one teenage boy and one senior citizen.

It was amazing.

Twin Cities Thursday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 15:32:00 +0000

Conner posts some drunken artwork from Art's birthday party. (Oh, and Stephanie also posted some a while back and was horrified not to be included in Twin Cities Thursday, so here it is.)
Glimpses of Soul takes a break from the cute stuff and photographs some fire dancers.
MINNpics posts the creepiest Halloween picture ever.
Bill Roehl wonders how Buffalo Wild Wings (which I put in the "Restaurant Axis of Evil" along with Applebee's and Chili's) does so well.
Secrets of the City/MNSpeak switches things up.
Art risks being run out of town by saying he doesn't like Surly Darkness.
Erica writes about LRT bike trail safety.
Camacho Watcho describes what it's like to really love food.
Stuff About Minneapolis shares some unusual park history.
Dusty Lens posts a photo that makes me sort of depressed about the weather.

The Encore Convention

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 04:56:00 +0000

Tonight I went to see They Might Be Giants at First Avenue, and while it was a great show with hands down the most polite, least pushy, and happiest crowd I've ever been a part of, it reminded me of the fact that I hate encores.

Now I'm sure when encores first started happening (maybe at some sort of symphony or opera or story told by a caveman around a campfire), it was pretty cool. Like "Hey, I thought this was over! We get more?"

But now it's the same routine at every concert in every city. The band thanks us, tells us we were a great crowd, and lets us know that this is their LAST. SONG.

Which we all know it isn't.

Then they run off the stage and let everyone scream in the dark for two or three minutes while we wait for them to come back and play one of their hits that we know they're going to play because how could they have skipped it? Then they play one of their more obscure songs or an unexpected over, after which they run off the stage again.

And if we're lucky, they do the whole thing again. It needs to stop.

Yet if it did stop, the entire crowd (probably including me) would feel cheated out of something, even if the band played as many songs as they would have with three encores.

It's never going to end, is it?

More on the Half Marathon

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 22:25:00 +0000

So my decision to run the half marathon, despite the fact that I've never run in a race of any kind (not a 10 miler, not a 10K, not even a 5K) is starting to make me feel a little bit like I'm looking before I leap, and despite the fact that I don't even start training until February, I'm starting to panic a little.

It's kind of like when I agreed to jump off a cliff without calculating how high it actually was (stupid Kiwis and their metric system).

We're not that sporty.

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 21:41:00 +0000

Conversation that took place after Art suggested I try to run at a 7 1/2 minute mile pace:

Emily: Yeah, that's like suggesting that I win the Heisman Trophy.

Art: What? I think you'd be good at hockey!

Spooky Scary

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 14:50:00 +0000

Just because it's nearly Halloween and Art's frequent playing of this song on his laptop means it's constantly in my head.

Twin Cities Thursday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 13:57:00 +0000

Amber is charmingly neurotic about a third date.
Bill Roehl gets his hands on an impressive amount of meat.
Conner gives an update on his lofty life goals. I'm keeping my eye out for nerdy ladies who like pizza for him. You should do the same.
Oh look, a rare double featured blogger! Conner has some really spot on thoughts about Surly.
Speaking of beer, Dusty Lens posts a brewery photo that oddly makes me think of Willy Wonka. Maybe beer is just a little too magical to me?
Sornie examines local grocery prices and grocery store branding.
Art searches for a man purse.
The Heavy Table launches an Atlas of Ethical Eating, which promises to be a handy reference for local diners.
In a controversial move, Paul Merrill hates on the Jucy Lucy.
Reuben reminds me that I'm not ready to be a homeowner.

Bacon Wednesday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 20:38:00 +0000

Were you wondering how Stephanie's birthday celebration went? Of course you were! Well, here it is.

-Emily

Bacon Wednesday #34

Happy Birthday To Me!

or

I Would Pay For Better Bacon, But Hey, It Was Free

When last we talked, I was really effing exited for free bacon at the Triple Rock for my birthday. It ended up being a great night--I wore flannel, ate meatloaf and drank many $3 PBRs. My brother and friends came and there was a fair amount of ridiculousness. And I got a cupcake! Oh, and my roommate was feeling (kind of aggressively) drunk generous and paid the whole group's tab. Good thing the beer was cheap and the bacon was free.

It smelled delicious in there as the clock approached 9 p.m....like imminent bacon. When the waitress brought around the baskets, I was pumped. Then I had a bit, and...eh.

I know, truly disappointing considering my excitement. The bacon was just fatty and didn't have crisp to it. However, someone at the table said that when they blotted it, it tasted better, which I can see. Actually, it sort of reminded me of sad fast food bacon--though let me make it clear that it was not sad bacon, just adequate bacon. But I like thick, meaty, crisped bacon...a lot like what the Triple Rock serves for brunch, actually. I really can't say if a few more minutes of cooking would have saved the bacon; it's worth a shot.

As I am a powerful force of bacon but also one of great forgiveness, you know I'm going back there another Wednesday to test it out again. Because, while it wasn't amazing bacon, that almost doesn't matter. Even the sadness of so-so bacon didn't damper my birthday. Because it was my birthday! And there was free bacon! On principle, I was, and remain, overjoyed.

Like what you've seen here? You can read what Stephanie thinks about things that are not bacon over at How Does She Do It?

I'm announcing this to the Internet so I can't turn back.

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 04:32:00 +0000

Okay, so here's the deal.

The other night when I was having dinner with Art, Zach, and Zach's futurewife Julie at the now-controversial Lyndale Tap House when Zach, now a seasoned marathon runner, started trying to convince Art and I to run the Eau Claire half marathon with him in May.

To which I thought, "Oh, hell no."

I mean, I'm no slouch. I've actually been running and working out quite a bit lately, but at the end of the day, I'm not really known for my athletic prowess. I didn't play sports in high school, I'm not very competitive (or coordinated for that matter), and I've always thought of myself as a bit of an "indoor kid."

Yet on Saturday, after running a 5k on the treadmill (the farthest I've ever run), I was feeling all endorphiny and good about myself when I saw a message on Twitter from Zach about the half marathon.

And, like a moron on a natural high, I said yes.

Which at first sent me into a panic, but after checking out some training schedules, I thought, "Hey, maybe this could be okay."

Most of the runs during the week are three or four miles (not far from what I'm doing right now) with gradually increasing runs on Saturdays, so I'd probably only hate my life on Saturdays, right?

Anyway, today I bit the bullet and signed up.

Training starts February 15th. What have I done?

On Negative Reviews

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 15:02:00 +0000

Quite a few people have asked me this morning whether I have my panties in a twist over The Heavy Table's overwhelmingly negative review of the Lyndale Tap House, presumably because I happen to love the place.

Which I guess means I should be offended by the fact that James Norton gave it 0.5 stars?

But calm down everyone, it' s going to be okay. In fact, I think this negative review could be a good thing!

A negative review provides balance.
I'm not a restaurant critic, and when people like me spout off about how much we enjoy something, it doesn't mean everyone is going to love it or that it's the best thing in town or that we've even tried more than one thing on the menu. And I'm not going to get offended when people don't agree with me. That's silly.

A negative review is a challenge.
Nobody's perfect, and criticism (even if this particular criticism might not have been completely constructive), challenges us to find room for improvement. For example, Norton thinks they're not doing a very good job with their desserts. I'd have to agree. And maybe now they'll step it up.

A negative review means smaller crowds and more pit beef for me.
And I like pit beef.

The Redhead Theory

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 11:21:00 +0000

Why can't we get enough of the redheads?

Yesterday on Twitter I brought up my theory that men tend to have celebrity crushes on women whose hair color is the opposite of that of their wife or girlfriend.

This very well-thought-out and extremely scientific theory is based on three pieces of evidence.

My dad, who is married to my (blonde) mom, has always had crushes on brunette actresses.
My friend Jeff, who just married my (brunette) friend Megan, recently listed his top FIVE celebrity crushes to me, and there wasn't a brunette to be found among them.
Art, who dates (blonde) me, seems to prefer brunettes like Feist and Zooey Deschanel.

And while I'm sure there's some sort of biological imperative for men to seek variety or some such, that's not really the point of this post.

The point is that when I brought this up to the Internet at large via Twitter, while some people wholeheartedly agreed and others were skeptical, the pervading question seemed to be:

But what about the redheads?

And the answer? Everyone seemed to love the redheads. Couldn't get enough of them regardless of what hair color the women in their lives were sporting.

So what, either biologically or culturally, does that mean? And why don't ginger men enjoy the same benefits?

Twin Cities Thursday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 14:18:00 +0000

Braublog asks if Jay Leno is killing the 10:00 news.
Art weighs in on the latest Internet craze, Google Wave.
According to Twin Cities Eats, the recently-opened OM doesn't live up to the hype.
Paul Merrill comes across an angry, angry truck owner.
MNIndy covers sketchy politics in Maplewood.
Andy Sturdevant gets a link for using the phrase "formidable sweater vest/suit/ushanka combination."
Erica wonders how "Uptown" she is.
Kate had an anniversary. I kind of want to be adopted into her family so they'll cook for me.
Kaeti discovers a new place for the 40+ crowd to find love.
And for people looking for other dating ideas, maybe you can learn something from Amber.

Park at your own risk.

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 12:12:00 +0000

Part of the roof of my apartment building is being replaced, meaning we've got the standard "several guys standing on the roof throwing things into a dumpster below" situation going on.

Part of the project is taking place near the parking lot, so there are signs posted at several building-adjacent parking spots that basically say:

I mean, you can park here if you want, but there's definitely going to be dust on your car. Also, we might drop some debris on there. But, you know, do whatever you want.

And when I got home last night, despite the fact that there were many other (albeit slightly farther from the door) spots available, people were parked there.

If I see a piece of roof through someone's windshield this week, I'm not going to feel bad.

PIT BEEF: An Ode to the Lyndale Tap House

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 03:50:00 +0000

I'm not sure why I haven't written about this yet, but if you haven't been to the recently-opened Lyndale Tap House yet, you should probably go.

When I first heard this place was opening, I was excited simply because it was another Lyn-Lake dining option close to Art's apartment, and with a name that included the words "tap house," I was counting on a fairly decent beer selection.

However, I was not prepared for the wonder that is PIT BEEF, which, according to their menu, is slow-cooked barbecue goodness that originated in Baltimore. (Don't worry, if you're not into beef, they also have pit sausage*, pit pork**, and pit ham.)

Basically, pit beef is amazingly tender shaved beef on a bun with onions and a huge dollop of creamy horseradish sauce on top.

I've had it twice, but I think about it all the time.

This is only made worse by the fact that every time I pass the place I see the plain neon sign hanging in their window that simply reads "PIT BEEF."

Anyway, you should go there.

*Art's ordered the sausage, which is topped with peppers, onions and house-made mustard, both times we've gone and claims this is the best sausage he's ever had. And he's a sausage aficionado, so that's saying a lot.

**This is what I hope to order some day if I can resist the pit beef. It has sweet habanero relish!

Mice or Cockroaches?

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Sat, 17 Oct 2009 13:57:00 +0000

Art's cat Triskit, who actually isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer when it comes to what cats are supposed to eat, killed her first mouse this week. (Though she didn't actually eat the mouse, just proudly laid it out in the middle of the living room, further supporting my theory that she would not survive in the wild.)

Anyway, while I'd like to give Triskit a big congratulations for her first mammal kill (word on the street is she once not only killed, but tortured a moth, but this is bringing things to a new level), I now have full-on mouse paranoia at Art's place.

Every squeak and creak I hear is a mouse in the walls that's going to come out and crawl all over my face while I'm sleeping (there have been dreams), and I've been on the lookout for the mouse hole.

But, to my surprise, Art's reaction was, "Well, better mice than roaches."

Really?!

It's always been my understanding that cockroaches, while they gravitate toward things that are already gross, don't actually bring their own grossness (like the plague, which I assume all mice have) to the table.

Whereas Art believe that roaches themselves are carrying diseases too! Ew!

So Internet, instead of me having to take the time to look all of this up in Wikipedia, which is more disease-ridden, a mouse or a cockroach?

Twin Cities Thursday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 19:30:00 +0000

MINNPics posts a great shot of this week's "WTF" snowfall.
Easier Being Green discusses downsizing.
Minnetonkascenes is ready for Halloween.
Andrew Zimmern compares Parasole's new offering to The Cheesecake Factory. Ouch.
Bill Roehl weighs in on "psychos and dumbasses."
Sornie asks everyone to leave Meghan McCain alone.
MnIndy talkes about mayors and meat.
Ed Kohler writes something not angry about a phone book publisher.
South 12th rewrites the Wikipedia entry on M*A*S*H. Just read it.
The Hot Dish lists the five worst Halloween candies.
The Heavy Table discusses branding apples.

Bad Ass Bride

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 22:58:00 +0000

I stood up in a wedding for the first time over the weekend. (You know, the one where I wrote something awkward in the guest book?)

I was a little nervous about it because I didn't know exactly how the day was supposed to go, what my duties were, or generally what went into making a wedding day happen.

And it's a pretty important day. Or at least that's what I hear.

So the big day came around, and everything seemed to be going smoothly. Hair and makeup got done, the wedding ceremony was not only beautiful but involved a Catholic priest solemnly reciting REO Speedwagon lyrics as the opening prayer. (Who knew the Catholics were so cool?)

After the ceremony, the wedding party and their dates all hopped on a big yellow school bus loaded with beer, champagne, and snacks ready to head to the park where the groom proposed to take our outdoor pictures.

And then . . . the bus wouldn't start.

We were only about a quarter mile from the park, but it was 40 degrees outside. Also, we were wearing strapless dresses and no coats.

Now, I feel like a lot of brides would have taking this opportunity to completely lose their shit, but Megan, being the resilient lady she is, refused a ride in someone's car, announced we were all walking, and picked up her train.

And we all, open containers (and in some cases, coolers) in hand, walked through the streets of historic downtown Cedarburg and a couple fields full of goose poop (and the offending geese).

Let's just hope you can't tell how cold we were in the pictures.

Bacon Wednesday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 22:02:00 +0000

Free bacon! What more is there to say?

-Emily

Bacon Wednesday #33

In Which Life Imitates Art

Remember the other week when I thought maybe I would have Bacon Wednesday for real? And then was disappointed? On my birthday?

Well, today is the last day of my Birthday Fortnight, the period of two weeks when a person can milk their birthday for all it's worth (so say I), and my brother is in town, so we are going to the Triple Rock with Boyfriend, Emily and some others to celebrate. Reasons this is awesome:

Brother is a vegan, and the Triple Rock has an impressive menu of vegan offerings that are actually quite delicious.
There will be $3 PBR tallboys.
There will be free bacon.

On Wednesdays, the Triple Rock serves FREE BACON, which is not news, but while this establishment is only a couple miles from my house I have never gone. I know, I know. I'm a sham. A salty, smoky, bacon-y sham. But don't be mad, it's my Birthday Fortnight.

Like what you've seen here? You can read what Stephanie thinks about things that are not bacon over at How Does She Do It?

Awkward thing I just remembered that I wrote in a wedding guest book over the weekend after several drinks

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 16:05:00 +0000

I love you guys. You are like my siblings . . . who marry each other.

Congratulations,
Emily

Now, I'm not saying what I wrote isn't true. I've known the bride and groom as long as I can remember and do think of them both as family.

However, I probably could have phrased it in a less incestuous-sounding way.

Oh well. Megan, Jeff, if you're reading this, congratulations, and I love you both.

Twin Cities Thursday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 13:47:00 +0000

The Walker's Jon Maichel Thomas reminisces about his contribution to a Coen brothers film.
And speaking of the Coen brothers, Max Sparber compares the St. Louis Park of A Serious Man to that of his childhood.
Kassie finds an awesomely awesome car.
Jamas Lileks is mad at Best Buy.
The mayor of my fine city calls Randy Moss a jerk. Which is not quite as cool as Obama calling Kanye a jackass, but he tried.
In other Minnesota sports news, Paul Merrill concludes that Joe Mauer is Brett Favre.
All the sports excitement must have me in an athletic mood, but I also enjoy this picture of Target Field from MINNPics.
The Heavy Table reviews Damn Good Food, the new cookbook from the owner of Hell's Kitchen. Someone should buy it and make me some sausage bread.
Jess, like the rest of us, lies to her doctor.
South 12th considers food delivery drivers' phone numbers.

The Drinking Ban

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 21:40:00 +0000

As part of my grand scheme to fit into my pants again, and I decided a few weeks ago to only drink beer on one "school night" per week (rather than all of them).

Usually, I choose to drink my beers on Monday nights because Art and I are in a bowling league, and who wants to bowl without beer?

This week, however, is looking like it's going to involve cheating.

Monday is my bowling league (see above).

Tuesday is the celebration of Art's dad's birthday (involving drinks), which will take place at various bars (where they serve drinks).

Wednesday I'm attending an event for the Hennepin Theatre Trust (that has free drinks).

Crap.

Small Victories

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 14:39:00 +0000

I'd like to announce that, although they're still much more snug than I would like, I no longer have to lie down on my bed to put on fresh out of the dryer jeans, nor do I have to do deep squats once they're on to stretch them to comfortable dimensions.

Booyah.

I'm So Classy

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 01:32:00 +0000

A scene from Saturday night:

Art: Do you want to go to Zeno and get fancy martinis and dessert?

Emily: What if I got some ice cream and we drank the Premiums in the fridge?

Classy, right?

Side Note: If you go to the grocery store . . .

Alone
On a Saturday night
In your pajamas
Without brushing your hair

. . . and spend a significant amount of time looking at the ice cream selection, you will look like a lonely, lonely lady.

That is all.

Twin Cities Thursday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 14:02:00 +0000

I find out that I'm dating a superhero.

Conner explains why people hate social media.
Speaking of people who hate social media, Stephanie (of Bacon Wednesday fame) joined Twitter.

The Heavy Table reviews five Oktoberfest brews.

This Is Why I Love Minneapolis has a less than thrilling Restaurant Week.

BrauBlog comments on the Strib's effort to clean up its comments.

Bill Roehl weighs in on Schwan's marketing sushi to schoolchildren.

Overheard in Minneapolis summarizes Minnesota's gubernatorial history.
Dusty Lens titles a picture "Puppy Hug." Therefore, I must post it.
Everyone seems to be talking about Newsbobber's list of the top 100 Minnesota blogs this week. (Nothing to get bloggers talking about you than ranking them, right?) So anyway, check it out (especially since I worked on it while I was unemployed!)

Bacon Wednesday

noreply@blogger.com (Emily) — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 01:05:00 +0000

Today is Stephanie's birthday. And she joined Twitter. It's a big day.

-Emily

Bacon Wednesday #32

I Thought It Would Really Be Bacon Wednesday

Today is my birthday. My roommate has an excellent habit of making two extra cups of coffee in the morning , thus giving me a reason to get out of bed every day (besides my cat). And today, in addition to coffee, I smelled bacon. And being the selfless lady that I am, I immediately thought, "she shouldn't have!"

And so I waited. And...waited. And then I really had to shower, so I spent my time while shampooing wondering if she'd leave the bacon in my room and hoping my cat wouldn't eat it. Or maybe it was warming in the oven!

So I peeked around the house in my bathrobe, trying to determine where she had left my birthday breakfast. The answer was: nowhere. She had made the bacon for herself. As she should--heck, as I would. But, le sigh, it's my birthday, and it's Bacon Wednesday, and I haven't had any bacon yet. Unless you count the slice of Canadian bacon on my Egg McMuffin this morning.

That one's for you, Emily.

Like what you've seen here? You can read what Stephanie thinks about things that are not bacon over at How Does She Do It?