"Open seven days a week. Closed Sundays."

Second Chances

2011-07-06T15:09:00.000-07:00

Ten years ago, an engagement ring was placed on my left hand.

I had decided to marry a man with whom I'd felt was generally a 'good' man and would be a good father, however, that “special something” was missing.

As the wedding date neared, my trepidation regarding the pending wedding and marriage grew, and yet I'd intentionally ignored the wailing alarms that went off inside my head. I was just experiencing cold feet... wasn't I?

A few days before my wedding, I recall having an open, heart-to-heart chat with a friend of mine, asking her for her opinion on what to do. She told me that I had to do what I felt was right for me, not for anyone else.

In spite of my mounting reservations, and my (shrieking) inner voice telling me not to go through with the wedding (even as I stood together with him at the alter) I went ahead and married this man. He was a 'good' man, after all, and I longed for a good husband who shared my dream of raising a family together.

I walked out on him, a little over a month later.

Along with living with the extreme guilt, shame and self-condemnation of what I had done to this man, I have also been living with the notion that I would probably never find the right man for myself. Convinced that I didn't deserve to have a happy marriage, and had blown my last chance with the last 'good' man I'd ever find, I had eventually resigned myself to the fact that I would most likely never get married again.

I was wrong.

God had other plans for me, and for my life. He had in mind for me someone so incredibly “perfect” for me in every way possible. He was saving this man for me until just the right time. I have never been so amazed at the way God has blessed my life as I am now.

God has indeed shown me that He knew my heart, and wanted to bless me not only what I wanted in a man, but what I needed in a husband. I could not have picked a better husband (and stepfather for my child) as the man that God has brought into my life. Perhaps what amazes me most is that I had given up on finding this such man, two and a half years ago. And yet, I never stopped longing to find him. Now that I'm able to look back, there always seemed to be a subtle reassurance that I'd felt deep in my heart that God had someone wonderful in store for me.

I am happy to announce that I married Mr. Wonderful two months ago. I can't remember ever feeling so blessed.

It's never too late for second chances.

25 Thought-Provoking Questions for 2011

2011-03-01T16:16:00.000-07:00

Are “big box” retailers bad for our economy?
Are Tea Party Conservatives and the Republican Party one and the same?
Are the March 2010 Federal Health Care Reform laws good for America?
Are we really to blame for global climate change?
Can alternative energy effectively replace fossil fuels?
Does Facebook make us sad?
Does free speech radicalize youth?
How should the U.S. respond to the unrest in the Middle East?
Is breastfeeding really best for babies?
Is it possible that money can indeed buy happiness?
Is sex-addiction a disease?
Is sexual orientation determined at birth?
Should abortion be illegal in ALL cases?
Should adults have the right to carry a concealed handgun?
Should all Americans be entitled to health care?
Should children ever be tried as adults in the court of law?
Should gay marriage be legalized?
Should medical marijuana be allowed in the workplace or schools?
Should synthetic marijuana be banned?
Should teachers get tenure?
Should unions be abolished?
Was Bill Clinton a good president?
Was Ronald Reagan a good president?
What are the best solutions to illegal immigration in the U.S.?
What should be done about the national budget deficit?

Click to view 2009 and 2010 questions.

How to Keep Facebook from Ruining Your Relationship

2011-02-22T13:32:00.000-07:00

Today, a Facebook friend of mine shared a link to a blog post about Facebook itself, and the people who use it.

Many of us these days have a Facebook account; a free online social media tool which allows us to connect and interact with one another.

Facebook currently has more than 500 million active users, 200 million of these people are currently accessing Facebook through their mobile devices.
More than 30 billion pieces of content (web links, news stories, blog posts, notes, photo albums, etc.) are shared on Facebook each month.
People spend over 700 billion minutes per month on Facebook.
The average Facebook user has 130 friends.
The average user creates 90 pieces of content each month.
The average user is connected to 80 community pages, groups and events.
There are over 900 million components (groups, events and community pages) to Facebook.

Facebook has been credited for reuniting long, lost relatives, helping the unemployed to find a job, allowing law enforcement to catch criminals, finding organ donors, enabling potential employers and college admissions officers to screen candidates accordingly, providing an easier way to serve court notices to defendants, as well as providing a way for singles to meet.

Facebook can also be attributed to infidelity, both emotional and physical. Countless marriages have been risked and ruined due to infidelity, and sometimes tragedy ensues.

But is Facebook itself to blame? Much like that old expression, "Guns Don't Kill People, People Kill People" – Facebook isn't the real problem here. The problem lies within the people who abuse Facebook. Particularly, in the area of marriage and relationships.

What many people DON'T seem realize is that many, many precautions can be made to avoid such pitfalls of emotional infidelity (which can, and most often do, lead to physical infidelity).

First let's explore five common areas of contention that might occur if a married or committed person was abusing Facebook:

Going on the warpath. Complaining or ranting about one's spouse would never be OK in a social situation such as a dinner party, so why would it be OK on Facebook?
Questionable Facebook "friends." Do you think you'd be able to tell who is sizing up your current relationship, and testing it for any weaknesses? You may be "friends" with an old flame, old crush, family, co-workers and real-life friends who might not have your best interests at heart - mainly the best interest of keeping your marriage healthy and in tact. If you "friend" a past-love interest, or meddlesome friend or relative on Facebook, your interaction with them is EXTREMELY critical and can create real and devastating collateral damage. In many cases, it might be best to not interact with them at all.
The cavalier "I’m just having fun" attitude. Let's say your spouse/significant other has reservations or anxiety about your connection with people, or has expressed concerns regarding particular comments made to you, or by you, on your Facebook profile. If your response is dismissive, flippant or even indignant, you're doing your partner (and yourself) a great disservice! Acknowledge their feelings and try to put yourself in their position – how would it make YOU feel, if the situation was reversed? Empathize and try to understand WHY they might feel the way that they do. Compassion is key.
The questionable or inappropriate "TMI" status-updates and comments. If you're over-sharing intimate or embarrassing details about your relationship or home-life, your dirty laundry can be seen as a sign that you're not happy in your relationship, as well as a welcome invitation for trouble. It's always a good rule of thumb to stop and ask yourself, "Is this something that I would be sharing if my spouse were looking over my shoulder?" and "Could I be embarrassing anyone else by writing this?"

Ways you can help prevent and curtail Facebook relationship problems:

Allow your spouse to "friend" your acquaintances and friends on Facebook.
Discuss and set clear boundaries together with your spouse.
Don't keep your partner or spouse a "secret" on Facebook. Name them in the relationship status section of your profile.
Give your significant other a warm "shout out" in your status updates, once in a while, and make only complimentary comments and remarks about him/her.
Hide any "person of interest" who could possibly pose a threat to your significant other from within your news-feed, so that you will not be tempted to interact with them.
Hide yourself; e.g. your posts, status-updates, photos from the aforementioned people, the ability to write on your "wall," limiting their interaction with you.
Limit time spent on Facebook.
Post only photos of the two of you, as a couple, for your profile photo.
Share one account between the both of you.
Share/exchange passwords with one another.
Turn the chat feature in Facebook off. It could easily set the precedence for lengthy email, phone conversations, and quite possibly face-to-face meetings, which are all non-productive (and possibly detrimental) to your existing relationship.
"Unfriend" ANYONE who makes your spouse uncomfortable (even your own mother, if need be) and do not accept anyone's friend request that could be upsetting to your partner.

Whatever you choose to look for on Facebook can be found. Keep this in mind if you're searching to reconnect with your childhood friends, or find an old flame. Really think things through, and where this could potentially lead you, before doing anything. The connection is often immediate, and once that door from the past is re-opened, the sudden onslaught of old emotions can be overwhelming. Be prepared – it can knock your socks off.

And like any open door, be prepared to have that door tightly slam shut, once and for all.

Quiz: Is Your On-Line Friendship Too Friendly?

WHY DO I DO THAT?

2011-02-19T09:27:00.000-07:00

Why do I...

1. Cross my fingers if the light turns yellow before I am about to cross an intersection?

2. Have an extremely difficult time asking for help, especially when I really need it?

3. Have Saturday morning cartoons playing on the TV when my daughter is not even home to watch them?

4. In my mind still feel 15 years-old on some days, and then feel 30 years-old on others?

5. Close and lock the bathroom door when I am home alone?

6. Make neat little hospital corners with my sheets while tucking them in, despite the fact that they end up getting completely covered up by the comforter/bedspread?

7. Paint my toenails in the winter time, when nobody outside the house actually sees them?

8. Say “excuse me” to myself when I am, in fact, all alone at the moment?

9. Wish to return to my childhood years, when all I wanted when I was a child was to be a grownup?

10. Worry about what complete strangers might think, if they should happen to see me skipping down the street with my daughter?

Happy New Year!

2011-01-01T13:50:00.000-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2010-12-08T12:52:00.000-07:00

December Sunset

Miss?

2010-11-15T12:03:00.002-07:00

“Hello, Miss...” the teen aged boy's greeting broke the silence of my morning walk. He turned his head to glance in my direction, as he passed me on his bicycle.

Miss? I wonder why he didn't use Ma'am? I thought silently to myself.
I have been accustomed to 'Ma'am' for many years now. Although I do prefer 'Miss' to 'Ma'am', I didn't think I could pass for someone young enough to be granted the title of 'Miss'.

I can still recall the first time I heard someone address me as 'Ma'am'. I was hardly a 'Ma'am' in my early twenties. I was shocked! When did I become a Ma'am? Do I look like a Ma'am? I started to ask myself this every time I fixed my hair or got dressed. How old does this dress make me look? Should I be wearing my hair this way?

Birthdays are have become increasingly uncomfortable for me, because the number just grows higher. I wish I could put them on pause for a while. Every year, they seem to arrive faster and faster.

And here comes another one - I will be 41 years old in two weeks. Now, I am sure that I am a 'Ma'am'. The median age for women in the U.S. is 38.1 years old, and I am certainly on the back side of that age. Younger than some, older than most.

Strangely, I don't feel as a 41 year-old should. Some of my teen-aged memories seem like recent past. On most days, I still think that I am in my twenties. Although, I'd like to think that I have grown wiser and more mature than I was while in my twenties.

I must admit that there is a part of me that mourns the fact that I am no longer considered “young.” Sometimes I wish I could turn the clock back to 18, and have a second chance at all the things that I missed in my youth.

I wonder - What will happen when I get to 50? Will I feel my age then? Or will I still feel like a young girl? 50 is really not that far away.

While the TV was on this morning, something caught my attention. Robin Roberts from Good Morning America was talking about this very thing – turning 50. Seeing that other people are actually happy and feeling fulfilled at 50 was very inspiring to me.

I guess that what it all boils down to is that age is just a number. We should not worry about our age, or growing older. We shouldn't mourn our lost youth, but instead embrace and celebrate the adventures to come, and realize that age milestones are just opportunities to reinvent ourselves.

Maybe turning 41 isn't such a bad thing after all.

Maybe I really am still a 'Miss'!

True Strength - A Guest Contribution

2010-11-09T05:04:00.004-07:00

When I first met my ex, who played for our high school’s basketball team, all I could think is, “Man, that guy is HUGE.” At 6‘5“ and 230, he was intimidating to some. He had these massive biceps that were enough to make any girl swoon. Unfortunately for him, he also was incredibly hairy and sweaty - so much so that the games would often have to be stopped just to mop up HIS sweat off the floor, which made him less than adorable.

Except to me, somehow. Odd how that happens.

As a cheerleader, I was skinny enough to make the uniform look good, and not all that strong. I felt (for many reasons in life and circumstance) helpless.

So, when this big, strong guy was directing his attention toward me - I really felt like my knight in shining armor had come along. I had just told myself a week before - “No more dating until college.” And yet, there he was. Similar hopes, dreams, and the like.

We dated, I went to college, and we got engaged at the end of my first year. He left for Basic Training, and when he was assigned to his new unit, we were told they were deploying on the day of my bridal shower. I was devastated. My protector and strength would be headed to a war zone, and I knew (from my family history) that this was NOT going to end well.

During re-deployment (for all you civilians, when they come back from war) I was actually afraid of him for at least two weeks. I could sense something had changed. He grew better at hiding it, and I became comfortable again. We had a son, then found out during his stint at flight school that I was pregnant with twins, just one year later.

Sure enough, when he came back, trying to deal with remaining the “strong” one made him think he should turn away from God and led him to alcoholism, cheating, abuse and financial ruin, leaving me in a bit of a pickle. There was no one there to hug me when I was scared or sad, and I ended up leaving at his request during my 8th month of pregnancy.

That strength that I’d been attracted to when we were dating was now crumbling right before my eyes, to the point that a shell of a bitter, angry, hateful man remained. And he was the father of my three sons and my husband. Emphasis on was. He threatened to kill me three times before the twins had even turned one, and our divorce was final just before they turned two.

In a practical sense, I had to be my own encourager, my own support and my own strength during the birth of our sons and raising them these last three years. In a spiritual sense, I had the “How Great Thou Art" God on my side, helping me and encouraging me every step of my painful, frightening journey. He may have been a soldier, at the tip of the spear of battle as an infantryman, but I had something better than alcohol, drugs, or sex to cope. I had God.

Even though the process to divorce AND to raising my sons has been a long one, God maintained my strength through his promises. I have relied on those at my weakest, and have come out of each and every “spiritual battle” stronger and more assured in His love and comfort than ever before.

So many of us have battles to fight in this life, some more difficult than others. But, the one thing we as believers have in common is His love to carry us through - as well as the promise that any difficulty we suffer will only benefit us in the long-run.

“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace [who imparts all blessing and favor], who has called you to his own eternal glory in Christ Jesus, will himself complete you and make you what you ought to be, establish and ground you securely, and strengthen and settle you.” 1 Peter 5:10

So, does strength only become defined by bicep-size, or ability to fight an enemy or even by trying to settle your problems on your own terms? Or is it putting love before all else, fighting for truth and completing the tasks God sets before us each day with joy?

When my ex was here for his bi-annual 1 hour visit with our sons, now 4 and 3, he said something that made me glow. “Thank you for being strong enough to love our sons even after everything I did to you. I am so sorry for everything I put you through, but I’m so proud of how much you have overcome.”

I can’t take the credit, though - because really, it was God in me that kept me going, and now I’m able to reap the benefits of everything that I’ve endured, as God has “strengthened and settled” in a place of true joy. Praise Him!

This is a guest contribution by Erin. Erin is a Christian. Erin is a joyful woman. Erin is a mother. Erin loves the Lord, her children, her family and living life with her special brand of joy every day. See her story at A Single Mama's Life where she shares her highs, her lows and her faith.

HAVE YOU VOTED?

2010-11-02T05:57:00.000-07:00

If you're not sure where your closest poll is located, try this poll locater tool:

No Candy for You!

2010-10-25T10:24:00.001-07:00

Image by US Army Korea - IMCOM via FlickrWhen I was (almost) 19 years old, I can recall one Halloween evening, some friends proposed that we dress up and go Trick-or-Treating. I had no objections to being able to use the holiday as an excuse to don a costume and score some free candy.

I also vividly remember the reactions from some of the adults around my neighborhood - "You guys are WAY TOO OLD to be Trick-or-Treating!" "You guys look RIDICULOUS!" "Just HOW OLD are you, anyway?" "Go on and get of here! Trick-or-Treating is for KIDS!"

Although some homeowners were highly annoyed with our pursuit of sugary confections, we were certainly not hurting anyone, or breaking any laws.

Nowadays, if you're a teen and you're caught Trick-or-Treating in some cities, you could end up in jail!

When it comes to the Halloween holiday, some cities have placed bans on how old a child can be for Trick-or-Treating. That age is 12.

Some lawmakers have decided that kids 13 and up are too old to Trick-or-Treat, and may be subject to fines up to $100 and time behind bars, if caught breaking the law.

In 2008, Mayor Mark Eckert of Belleville, Illinois decided that it would be a good idea to ban Trick-or-Treating by high school-aged teens, because it made some seniors and single women scared to open the door to find "6-foot-tall kids" looking for candy.

City officials are also banning teens from Trick-or-Treating in Meridian, Mississippi; Bishopville, South Carolina; Boonsboro, Maryland; and various cities in Virginia.

Although a big part of Halloween for teenagers in the 19th and early 20th centuries was vandalism and other acts of destruction, in today's times, many would agree that the holiday is now all about celebrating children.

Should teenagers be banned from Trick-or-Treating?

What do you think?

Sunday Stealing - The Presuppose You're Living in New England Meme

2010-10-24T08:02:00.006-07:00

Image by Professor Bop via FlickrQuestions for Autumn

1. Have you turned the heat on in your house yet this fall? - I'm still running the air conditioner, as I live in Arizona. Just two weeks ago, we had triple digit temps!

2. Do you allow your pets on the furniture? - Definitely. They are a part of the family!

3. What were your final words for September? -Good riddance, scorching heat. Now I can enjoy the outdoors!

4. What are your first words for October? - Welcome, cooler temps! Can I open the windows yet?

5. Do you think you’ve ever seen a ghost? - Nope. Have you?

6. What is the one color that represents this time of year? - Orange. It's everywhere!

7. Which of your senses do you think is most sensitive this time of year? - My sense of smell. I love smelling the fresh autumn air.

8. What is your favorite thing to do at the county fair? - Ride the rides! Especially the roller coaster.

9. What do you like when you have a cold? - Hot, steamy showers to clear up my head.

10. Are you willing to spend over $100 for a piece of winter clothing, like boots or a coat? - Are you kidding? Heck no!

(Don't ask me what happened to question #11...)

12. What do you have too much of in your kitchen? - Clutter. The counter tops are covered with clutter.

13. What gripes do you have about this time of year? - That I buy too much Halloween candy. And then end up eating it.

14. Other than yourself, are you responsible for getting anyone ready in the morning? - My seven year-old daughter. She likes to drag her feet, so getting her ready on time is quite the challenge.

15. When was the last time you cleaned your gutters? - Uh, never.

16. So, it’s after Labor Day. Will you still be wearing white? - Sure. Why not?

17. What shows are you most looking forward to this Fall? - Not really looking forward to any shows. I don't have cable/satellite T.V. and I'm lucky to get three channels simultaneously.

18. What three things have you just not gotten around to from the summer, but probably should do before snow flies? - Yard-work. Clearing out the front room. Cleaning out the garage.

If would like to participate in Sunday Stealing, link up here .

Wordless Wednesday

2010-10-20T04:57:00.001-07:00

Parents Should Expose Children to Sign Language

2010-09-19T20:05:00.001-07:00

Parents Can Give Their Children a Competitive Edge through Early Exposure to Sign Language

This article is a guest contribution by Emily Patterson and Kathleen Thomas. Emily and Kathleen are Communications Coordinators for the Zionsville educational child care facility, a member of the AdvancED® accredited family of Primrose Schools (located in 16 states throughout the U.S.) and part of the network of Indiana educational child care preschools delivering progressive, early childhood, Balanced Learning® curriculum.

One of the keys to surviving in a tilted economic system in which opportunities to achieve a decent standard of living will be limited is versatility – and the ability to communicate articulately in a variety of ways with the widest possible audience. This includes bilingual ability as well as the ability to communicate in non-verbal ways for the benefit of the disabled – primarily the deaf.

At the same time, a growing shortage of qualified interpreters fluent in American Sign Language has led to more career opportunities – and if current trends continue, it's likely that skilled ASL interpreters will have little problem securing lucrative employment in a society where such a commodity is destined to be in short supply.

Signing Before They Can Speak

A great deal of research has clearly demonstrated that the early years – ages 2 to five – are the best time to educate children in different modes of communication and language. This goes beyond the spoken word (though it is an optimal time for children to learn a second language); many young children have an aptitude for signing as well.

This is not as odd as you may think. As you know, many indigenous peoples around the world, including American Indian nations, have used sign language for centuries to facilitate communication with other tribes with whom they do not share a language. Some paleontologists and anthropologists theorize that Neanderthals – who apparently lacked the vocal mechanism to produce many spoken words – depended a great deal upon hand gestures to communicate.

In fact, recent research suggests that sign language is innate. An article published in the Boulder Daily Camera in 2003 presented strong evidence that babies as young as six months old communicate with their hands:

"...by 6 to 7 months, babies can remember a sign. At eight months, children can begin to imitate gestures and sign single words. By 24 months, children can sign compound words and full sentences. They say sign language reduces frustration in young children by giving them a means to express themselves before they know how to talk." (Glarion, 2003)

The author also cites study funded by the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development demonstrating that young children who are taught sign language at an early age actually develop better verbal skills as they get older. The ability to sign has also helped parents in communicating with autistic children; one parent reports that "using sign language allowed her to communicate with her [autistic] son and minimized his frustration...[he now] has an advanced vocabulary and excels in math, spelling and music" (Glarion, 2003).

The Best Time To Start

Not only does early childhood education in signing give pre-verbal youngsters a way to communicate, it can also strengthen the parent-child bond – in addition to giving children a solid foundation for learning a skill that will serve them well in the future. The evidence suggests that the best time to start learning ASL is before a child can even walk – and the implications for facilitating the parent-child relationship are amazing.

Marriage Envy

2010-09-11T13:04:00.000-07:00

SINGLE FOLKS:

Have you ever felt any regrets, or wished your life had turned out differently?

Do you ever feel envy towards your friends that seem to have it all; happily married, with beautiful families?

Lately, I am struggling with my singleness.

I have mixed feelings. A part of me feels a certain peace about being single. I don't miss the marital stress and I don't miss the fighting. I also have a fear of intimacy, and major trust issues.

But there is another part of me that just as soon as I get a glimpse of what other people have; I feel regretful and lonely. Sort of like I have wasted too many years holding out for my 'ideal' mate. And a little resentful; like I've been shorted my “American Dream” that I have carried around with me, for as long as I can recall.

This is not about babies anymore. I have moved past the baby urges, thankfully!

It's about companionship with someone who would hold my heart. It's about spending the rest of my days with a man with whom I'd share mutual admiration and respect for. A man I can feel safe enough to give my heart to, and in return he'd give me his. A man who will be there to push me in a wheelchair when I am old and frail. Or a man who I will help to feed and dress, when he is no longer able to take care of himself. A man who will hold my hand, make me laugh, and will let me wrap my arms around him, while lying next to him at night.

Over the past couple of years I have re-connected (thanks to Facebook) with people I once knew, when I was young. Many of them are former boyfriends. It feels as if they're all married, with lovely wives and beautiful children.

In many of my past relationships, I had hit the 'eject button' at the first sign of trouble. I was insecure, sometimes a bit immature, and I didn't want to wait around long enough to get hurt. I was outta there!

And if I was the one who ended the relationship, I start to second-guess my initial decision to dump. I wonder if I should have had more patience and held on, rather than letting go. And what REALLY stings is the fact that many of them (including my ex-fiance) have married the very next girl to come along after me. Ouch.

I know envy is wrong. I try to appreciate my life as it is, and try to stop myself from having these foolish regrets. I try to remind myself that it's not about me – it's about God. HIS plan, not mine.

But I still struggle with it.

Dear Child

2010-09-09T15:40:00.003-07:00

Dear Child:

I just wanted to remind you today of how beautiful you are... because there is a father of lies who will try to deceive you. He will try to tell you that you are not good enough, not attractive enough, not thin enough, not strong enough, not smart enough, not righteous enough, and that you are aren't important to Me. He will try to tell you that you have broken one too many promises, that you have fallen one too many times, that you have lived one too many lies, and that you've been going in the wrong direction so long that it is pointless to turn back now.
But guess what? YOU DO NOT BELONG TO HIM. He is not your father.
I AM.

You see, you are My creation. My workmanship.
You have been borne of My thought, every part of you placed together by My hands.
You have My thumbprint upon you.
You are a prince/princess, did you know that?
You are My child, the child of THE King!
I look at you and see a precious, priceless pearl.
There is no ocean I would not swim, no mountain I would not climb, no price I would not pay to have you and to be with you and call you my own.
I already have.

I have done all that I could, given all that there is.
I desire to be with you every moment of every day.
How I long for you to talk to Me every day.
My love for you never grows cold.
My promises are never broken (contrary to what he might
lead you to believe).
My character never changes.
And you, my child have been made in My image.
I love you dearly, unconditionally and completely.
I understand every emotion that you have. I've been there.
I count every tear that you cry.
I know every hair on your head.
And do you know what? I even know your weaknesses and your failures and your fears. I know those hidden parts of you that you wish would go away. Those dark corners of your world that you stuff deep down, praying that no one will ever see. I have already seen them and they will not change my love for you. Nothing will.

I love you, heart and soul.

I just wanted to remind you today of how beautiful you are, and how precious you are to Me.

With Unmeasurable Love,
Your Heavenly Father

Author Unknown

Wordless Wednesday

2010-09-08T09:17:00.000-07:00

To My Friends

2010-08-17T13:27:00.000-07:00

Image by wickenden via FlickrWe should thank the friends that:

made promises that they didn't keep
broke our plans or stood us up because something better came along
abandoned us every time she got a new boyfriend
excluded us when planning a girl's spa weekend, or a ladies' night out, or choosing her bridesmaids
smiled in our face, then stabbed us in the back
sneaked around behind our back to date our ex
provided plenty of backhanded compliments, and loved to tell us all the nasty things other people said about us
continually hijacked the conversation to talk about her life and her problems, but changed the subject when we needed to vent
told us they'd be there for us, but made themselves scarce just when we needed them most
conveniently forgot when she owed us money, or when it was her turn to pay

Because without them, we wouldn't have learned to appreciate the friends who:

went out of their way to be helpful in times of need
looked out for us when we couldn't look out for ourselves
always treated us the same, in happy and unhappy times
always pointed out what was best for us
were always sympathetic when the chips were down
were the first to rejoice at our good fortune
stood up for us and stopped others who spoke against us
always gave more than they needed to

And without them, we wouldn't have learned that:

a good friend is worth more than all the world's purest gold, platinum and rhodium combined
in order to have a good friend, you need to first be a good friend

"Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget." - unknown

Wordless Wednesday

2010-07-07T09:13:00.000-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2010-06-23T15:09:00.002-07:00

All Single Moms NEED to See This Video

2010-06-12T08:58:00.000-07:00

Some very sage advice for all single moms. We all need to be on guard for our precious children who depend on us.

This is one of the main reasons why I don't date. I can't afford to take any chances where my little girl's well-being is concerned. Call me paranoid - I'd rather be safe than sorry. The risk is NOT WORTH IT!

I dated a man a few years ago whom I met at church, and he very quickly on acted like he wanted to give me the moon and the stars. It all felt too good to be true. I was smart enough to check out his background, and when something didn't seem right, I investigated.

What I found sickened me.

He was an accused child-molester. Although never charged or convicted in the criminal court system, he had been accused of molesting his own daughter by his ex-wife, about 15 years prior to my meeting him.

He swore up and down that his ex-wife had made the whole thing up; that he was innocent. He might have been. He also might have been guilty. I COULDN'T TAKE THAT CHANCE. I cut off ALL ties with him. The safety and well-being of my daughter is more important than any other relationship!

Let me repeat - THE SAFETY AND WELL-BEING OF MY DAUGHTER IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANY OTHER RELATIONSHIP!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-05-25T21:33:00.000-07:00

Top Ten Tuesday - LOST

2010-05-18T17:03:00.001-07:00

Top Ten People from LOST I'd Not Mind Being Lost With:

1.John Locke – The real Locke was friendly, helpful and knowledgeable, and he always had faith that things would work out the way that they were supposed to.

2.Jack Shephard – Despite being somewhat short-tempered and control-freakish, Jack is a natural leader and acting-patriarch. Besides, you just never know when a doctor will come in handy.

3.Desmond Hume - Bearded babe with an accent... need I say more?

4.Sayid Jarrah - A handsome human lie-detector, and handy with electronics, too.

5.Richard Alpert - Once given the gift of immortality, he's been around longer than everyone alive, and knows what to expect from the Man in Black.

6.Hugo "Hurley" Reyes – He's such a friendly, fun, bighearted guy who can see and talk to dead people.

7.Kate Austen – A true survivor in dangerous situations, she will risk her own life to save others. This chick has guts!

8.Jin-Soo Kwon – He's strong, a good fighter and he knows how to fish. He's not too hard on the eyes, either.

9.Sun-Hwa Kwon – She's brave, helpful and caring, and she can grow a vegetable garden from scratch.

10.James "Sawyer" Ford - Definitely NOT politically correct, can be selfish & stubborn at times, but he's irresistible, all the same.

My Top Ten Favorite Sawyer Nicknames:

1.For Ana Lucia Cortez: "Ponce de Leon"
2.For Ben: "The Artist Formerly Known As Henry Gale"
3.For Charlie: "Oliver Twist"
4.For Frank: "Chesty"
5.For Jack: "Dr. Do-Right"
6.For Karl: "Bobby" (Brady)
7.For Locke: "Mr. Clean"
8.For Michael: "Captain Bligh"
9.For Sun & Jin: "Crouching Tiger and Hidden Dragon"
10.For The Man in Black: "Ghost of Christmas Past"

We'll miss you, LOST!

For more Top Ten Tuesday, please visit Oh Amanda, here.

13 FUNNY RESTAURANT BLOOPERS

2010-04-15T12:38:00.000-07:00

1."7 ounces of choice sirloin steak, boiled to your likeness and smothered with golden fried onion rings." -- On a menu.

2."Eat Here - Get Gas" -- A sign at a gas station.

3."Ham and Cheese - $2.50. Cheese and Ham - $2.90." -- On a menu.

4."Hot drinks to take out or sit in." -- A sign on a cafe.

5."May be combined with other offers. . . . Not valid with any other offer." -- On a Papa John's coupon.

6."NOW HIRING / TWO FRENCH DIPS / FOR TWO DOLLARS." -- A sign at an Arby's in North Bend, Washington.

7."Open seven days a week. Closed Sundays." -- On the bottom of a pizza parlor's take-out menu. (Hmmm... now where have I seen THAT before?)

8."Our Infamous Steaks” -- A sign at a restaurant in Raleigh, NC.

9."Our whipped butter is made with margarine." -- On a menu.

10."Parking for drive-through customers only." -- A sign at a McDonald's in California.

11."Please consume all food on premises." -- A sign at a Souplantation restaurant.

12."We dare you Burger for two (Served on a Stretcher) - A Whole Loaf of Crunchy French Bread running end to end with Broiled Hamburger topped with melted Yellow American Cheese, Lettuce, and Tomato. Accompanied by a mound of French Fried Potatoes, Red Pepper Relish, Ketchup, and Pickle Wedges. Delivered to your Table by Two Waitresses on a stretcher." -- On a menu of a restaurant in Danvers, Massachusetts.

13."You can't beat our meat!" -- A sign on a restaurant, now closed.

(For more Thursday 13, go here.)

How Do YOU Feel About This?

2010-04-14T11:32:00.002-07:00

Top Ten Tuesday - Top Ten Guilty Pleasures

2010-04-13T12:33:00.000-07:00

Guilty pleasures these days are far and few in between.

As my unemployed status still hangs over my head, I have less money to throw around than ever before. And being a single mom, that wasn't much to start with. I always end up feeling guilty for spending money on something that is not a necessity, even if it's just a few bucks.

In addition to tightening my belt, I also must be concerned with my belt becoming too tight. Well, actually my pants. Let's face it, after the forty-mark, I have to be ever so watchful of the calories I consume. I no longer have the metabolism of a 20 year-old, and all I have to do these days is simply LOOK at a piece of cake and I gain five pounds.

But I can still dream.

Top Ten Guilty Pleasures:

A (full-fat, full-sugar) Starbucks latte.
A pedicure.
A piece of cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory.
A professional massage.
An original size Cinnabon with extra frosting (or two minis).
Buying new CD's.
Getting my hair high-lighted AND low-lighted.
Olive Garden salad and bread sticks.
Pizza from California Pizza Kitchen.
Scoring more than one new pairs of shoes that I really didn't need.

For more Top Ten Tuesdays, check out ohAmamda here!