An Asian in Hollywood

A Discernable Taste

2012-01-27T16:41:00.000-08:00

There's this scene in the epic novel "Musashi," somewhere within its 970 pages, where the young samurai, fresh from a bloody battle, is invited by an old ceramics master and his mother to sit down for tea in the middle of a field. Musashi is a bit disheveled in his trademark mass of hair sprouting wildly from his scalp, but he is only self-conscious about one thing: his lack of experience in the art of tea.

The master tells Musashi that one only need be genuine and honest and not be concerned with anything else, after which he asks the samurai to look at a pair of tea cups and discern which is more valuable. It is here that the master discovers another master, and thus begins a lifelong friendship between the two.

I've known many who've claimed such masterful skills — the ability to discern true quality over what is probably just good marketing — but have only met a small handful of them. You'll know them by what they recommend in the way of restaurants, clothing, bartenders, appliances, tools, knives, entertainment, markets, wines and, oddly enough, sushi.

It's one thing to know a good sushi or sashimi restaurant. It's quite another to know why it's good. Because when you know why it's good, a chef just might pay attention to you, not necessarily the other way around.

There's a documentary called Jiro Dreams of Sushi that is coming to theatres in March that is sure to prove popular among local foodies and other aficionados, particularly of sushi but not necessarily so.

Here's Anthony Bourdain taking a sampling below.

I like Anthony Bourdain and I think he has this discerning characteristic that has been his trademark ever since he wrote his first essay critiquing the gourmet establishment.

As for me, I only wish I may become as trained in both vision and taste. Unfortunately, my sense of smell is still somewhat lacking, so I'm at a bit of a handicap, but maybe if my other senses can make up for it, I might have a fighting chance.

Man, sushi sure sounds good right about now. It is a Friday night, isn't it? Let's go get some, shall we? Shall I pick you up about 8?

Murakami, Coelho, Hoshino: Some Light Reading

2012-01-23T12:07:00.000-08:00

Paulo Coelho, author of The Alchemist , has a blog and a series of vlogs on the writing process. Like his books, these videos are capable of feeding both the experienced and the beginner—a remarkable skill of his. The 4th installment is below and is also viewable on Coelho's YouTube channel.

My all-time favorite Haruki Murakami book, Norwegian Wood , was adapted into a movie last year and screened all throughout Asia. Reviews say that it is beautifully shot and aptly cast, and that it remains true to the haunting yet mildly erotic themes of the book. As for me, I can't wait to see it on the big screen in America (as opposed to some downloaded bootleg), and it looks like I'll get my chance this weekend at the Laemmle Theatres here in Los Angeles.

Directed by Vietnamese filmmaker Tran Anh Hung (The Scent of Green Papaya), the author was recently interviewed by the Pacific Citizen and he talks mostly about the language barriers involved as the dialogue is completely in Japanese. But there's a great quote at the end of the article where Tran had a conversation with one of the actresses on the concept of experience vs. expression:

"Rinko Kikuchi came to me and, very moved, told me something that had disturbed her for a while, I guess. She said that there is something that she cannot understand about herself and asked me: 'Hung, how come when I cry in real life, I don’t feel it’s as true as when I cry on the set for a scene?' And my answer made her cry: 'Because you are an artist. In life, we have experiences but, in art, we have expressions. For an artist, expression is always more true and perennial than experience.'”

I sat on that quote for a few days and let it sink in. To actors, I believe he is saying that in order for a feeling to become completely fleshed out, it must be expressed in a way that is both true to their act of expression and true to themselves, whereas just an experience may not encompass both parts, especially the expression part.

For writers, that probably means that not only must you feel the emotion inside when you write it, the expression of it must also be true, as well as true to the writer's act (or art) of expression. In other words, I have to feel the pain and describe it well too.

But how does one describe pain accurately? How do we make the feeling universal enough so that a reader, no matter what state of mind they may be in, will read the words and instantly comprehend the feeling behind them? It's a difficult task! Fortunately, I have plenty of pain to reference in my life, so this thing is perhaps one of the easier jobs for me. It's actually finding time to get the words on paper that I have the most difficulty with.

On another note, I once worked with an illustrator who has a new children's book out in print. Felicia Hoshino is her name and the story is called Sora and the Cloud. It was recently reviewed in The New York Times and I'm both envious and very proud of her. Great job, Felicia!

The Samurai Economy

2011-11-23T12:40:00.001-08:00

I'm just a layman when it comes to the art of samurai. I've read a few books — Book of Five Rings, Musashi, Art of War, The Unfettered Mind — and even took a class in stage samurai called Tate where we learned the earth, tiger and dragon katas. Very recently, I learned there were two ancestors of mine who were "adopted" by the Tokunaga family and trained as samurai. Not that this means something, but being Japanese, for many, means figuring out where your family was in the feudal class structure. If one of them was a samurai, you rock!

I happened to view this awesome film by Takeshi Fukunaga on one of the last living master swordmakers in Japan, Korehira Watanabe, and it reminds me of why I value those who are able to reach a mastery of any given subject. Japanese craftsmen take it to a different level, of course, by mastering one craft throughout their lifetime, and then handing that tradition to someone else who will hand it someone else.

I love that stuff. And I think many people do, even those of us who are so far removed from the Japanese culture, myself included.

Back in the feudal era of Japan, there was a samurai economy. Samurai collected a certain stipend from their lord's estate, often in the form of rice, barley or some other valued commodity. They, in turn, could use their salary to cultivate the many things that would suit a samurai: geisha, tea ceremonies, sharpening their swords, chats with zen monks, studying the art of war, calligraphy, ikebana, landscaping, sculpturing, painting, etc.

There's a passage in Unfettered Mind that goes against popular Western thinking, particularly in self-help books. While most self-help books say that anyone can do anything, Unfettered Mind says that it takes so much effort and discipline to become a samurai, most people will never achieve this super status. Or, more pointedly, of all the things it takes to become a samurai, mostly likely you do not possess it.

This sort of thinking is perhaps the essence of the Japanese craftsmen. They continue to hone their skills, never satisfied with their last achievement. Those who could afford it would patronize these master craftsmen, who would in turn patronize other master craftspeople. When you were in that downstream of wealth, you were in the samurai economy. And the very bottom of that stream would, I suppose, be the peasants.

I'm not really sure why I wrote this entry, other than the idea that the video above sparked an old flicker I use to have when it came to doing things. That is, doing things the right way, or not doing them at all. But if you committed to doing it, you committed to doing it for a lifetime.

Earlier on my way to work today, I made a little prayer asking why it is that I no longer have the burning desire to accomplish something beyond myself right now. Not in acting, writing or anything else. It's probably because my ideology has changed, that's for certain, but there must be something else to it. I hope to figure it out soon enough — both what I'd like to accomplish and why I don't have this feeling anymore.

Miyamoto Musashi, in Book of Five Rings, said that once you master one thing, you master all things. He certainly was a living example of this, as he was a gifted sculptor, painter, philosopher, and landscaper in addition to being a master samurai. I've studied a lot of things, but I sure haven't mastered any of them. Perhaps it's time to focus on one of them.

Melrose 20 Years Later

2011-10-17T11:56:00.000-07:00

Almost 20 years ago, I made the great coastal trek down the 5 freeway to L.A. from Seattle. Originally, my plan was to look for a job in TV news, hoping to be a news reporter at one of the small TV stations in California: Fresno, Bakersfield, Monterey, San Luis Obispo. I knocked on a lot of doors, trying to work my way into an interview so I could show them my audition tape. When that didn't prove fruitful, I made my way over to Arizona—Yuma to be exact, which at the time was the smallest TV news market in the country, and possibly the universe.

Yes, I was willing to start small, ant-sized small, then move up from market to market. It's how people usually do it in the broadcast news world, well, people who don't have something like a beauty pageant title to help propel your career. But this was 1992—yes, you knew I had a "but" ready—and it was the height of the economic recession in California. Unemployment was high, and homeowners were walking out of their mortgages, much like today.

My first job in Los Angeles was on Melrose Avenue, which I didn't choose. I called a friend from Seattle who was working at Nordstrom and he knew a friend who knew a friend who could hook me up with a job there selling shoes. Bronx Shoes, I believe, is the name of the store. And it was actually still frequented by some celebrities.

The owner also had two other stores on Melrose: Boy London and something else. I took a stroll down Melrose with my wife this past Saturday, hoping to spark some of the old memories. But no, most of the old stores and restaurants (Hama, Cafe Luna, The Gap) have either changed or are closed down. Others aren't even stores anymore. They're marijuana dispensaries like this one.

After parking my car, I saw a pretty blonde coming out of one carrying what looked like medical paperwork so that she could qualify for a prescription. She was probably an actress of some sort, nicely dressed, with dark sunglasses to hide most of her face. I can't imagine that coming out of one these places would be a good photograph for any known actress, however, so she was probably no one famous.

I walked into a couple of vintage clothing store and eventually scored a black leather belt with a large loop for a buckle, something like the one I had seen Bruce wear in one of his old photos. It cost me a whole $14 and I took it home for a good cleansing with a foaming leather cleaner I bought from Aldo. Except for a cup of coffee at The Coffee Bean, I didn't buy anything else on Melrose. It just wasn't a fond reunion. Sad, really. Larchmont District is much better for doing any kind of shopping nowadays. I bought an azure blue T-shirt at a store called Noni with the instructions: "Be the love." I'll try.

Posing Til Closing

2011-09-28T13:30:00.000-07:00

Time to revisit the subject of "How to take a really good photograph." Personally, I need to revisit this subject myself. Why? Because I haven't been taking very good photos lately. I have to admit that I'm feeling a little heavy in the face and body, and this affects how I feel in front of a lens. Truthfully, I am about 8-10 pounds heavier than my best picture-taking weight right now. That's not good, especially for my confidence in front of the camera.

So, just like you, I need all the tricks I can find to take a better picture. Gizmodo posted a pretty good article on it here and offers tips from a supermodel. Which just happen to be similar to my own tips on the subject here. Yes, patting myself on the back again.

One of the things the Gizmodo article mentions that I don't is how to angle your face, which I didn't have a clue about. The model, Shalom Harlow, says to find your light, and then face it. This makes all the sense in the world. I mean, even if you are 15, bad lighting can make you look 20 years older. So if you're in your 40s, make sure the lighting is working for you, not against you.

When Harlow says to face the lighting, she means to physically angle the front "plane" of your face and turn it toward the light. That way, shadows don't form where they shouldn't, like in those little wrinkles above your nose or to the left or right of your eyebrows. Don't point your nose down in an attempt to look more suave and debonair. That should come from your intentions, not how the light catches your face.

Recently, I went to one of those dermatology parties (i.e., Botox parties). I have a friend who's 6 years my senior and she is very much into cosmetic enhancements. The dermatologist brings the equipment to someone's house and performs the treatments there. I'm not yet doing the Botox, but I do have a fair amount of facial scars, pigment spots and other skin tag-like things on my neck. So I get them burned off or cauterized with a laser.

Right now, I'm scar city. Got little dark scabs all over my neck and face, mostly on my neck. After a couple days of healing, I'm starting to put some cover-up makeup on them. But it hardly does the job. Concealer doesn't work so well on scabs, apparently.

Yeah, it's kinda gross, but it's the price I pay to look, well, how I used to look 10 years ago.

Another point Ms. Harlow makes is to look directly into the lens. I often find myself looking in the photographer's eyes rather than at the lens. It's an amateur's mistake though. Look into the lens, and understand that you are actually looking at the viewer when your photo shows up on a computer monitor somewhere else.

Not sure if I mentioned it before, but one time, this Japanese girl was taking a Polaroid during a casting session and she angled a manila folder just below her chest like a reflector. I honestly don't know if that's going to make you look better, but I do have to wonder about that. I mean, when was the last time a professional photographer gave you "underlighting" as an effect?

The reason I am mentioning it here is that, as hopeful actors and models, we often will do things, spontaneously, to try to gain a leg up on the competition in a room. The absolute best thing you can do, spontaneously, is to make that poorly lit Polaroid stand out. How? By lighting up the camera with your natural, glowing personality. I know that sounds obvious, but the idea is to practice doing this over and over again, and make it seem natural. It's not an easy thing to do.

What to Do for a Living

2011-08-17T16:22:00.000-07:00

There once was a time when I was asked for my highly regarded opinion on what a young person ought to do with his or her life. And yes, I was naive enough to answer it and think my opinion would be taken seriously. I mean, really, who gives a crap what an older person thinks? It's still not going to sway anyone's life choices one way or the other, especially a young person's life choices.

But there I was, being put on the spot in front of a group of young folks, all with dreams as wide as the Los Angeles air is smoggy. Okay, let's just stop right there, why don't we? I sound really damn jaded there, don't I? Smoggy? Let's back this rig up a bit, shall we?

The title of this entry is "What to Do for a Living." Not "What to Do with Your Life." And so I answered it as such. I said, "In my experience, I don't think you should do what you love for a living. I think you should do something that you're really good at." And right away, a young blonde shot back, "I disagree completely! You should only do what you love. How can you even say that?"

Actually, she wasn't waiting for me to explain myself. She had already made up her mind, both that I was wrong, and that she was only going to do what she truly loved.

I smiled, in the way Japanese people do when they're thinking of something that doesn't really bring a smile to their face. And then I turned to a young girl who was still interested in my opinion. Which is odd, because most young people I know don't really want to hear an older person's opinion. They just want to express their own opinion, especially when they ask someone else for their opinion.

So I looked at this girl and said, "Sometimes, when you do something you love for a living, it can take the love right out of it. Especially when you're not having a good day. Or when you're sick, or tired, or both. Doing stuff you love is really good when you're in a good mood. But when you're in a bad mood, the stuff you love can turn on you. And when it turns on you, it can really suck.

"And that's why you should do something you're really good at. Because you're still good at it, even when you're not feeling well, or you're tired or sick."

The young girl smiled sweetly. In my mind, I want to believe that she pondered that little piece of advice of mine and used it to enrich her life. I wouldn't blame her, however, if that smile of hers was just a cover for something else. She was Japanese after all.

My Obsession with Wooden Sunglass Frames

2011-08-05T12:49:00.000-07:00

A long, long, long time ago, I bought my first pair of Ray-Ban "wooden" Wayfarer II sunglasses with the Polaroid lenses at a small clothing shop in Seattle off of Broadway in Capital Hill. And then I had them stolen. So I bought another pair. And then those got stolen. And then I bought my last pair before you could no longer buy them any more from anywhere. That was well over 20 years ago. I had my car valet parked somewhere in Los Angeles and when I came back, my entire Ciao! bag (yes, I said Ciao! bag and yes, I know that's so 1980s, but it was black and unique and nobody had one) was stolen with some stuff in it along with my "wooden" sunglasses.

I put wooden in quotes because the Ray-Ban version was actually made of plastic and had a coarse feel to the surface, almost like they had been made of real wood but forgot to sandpaper them to a fine polish. Here's a picture of the Wayfarer I version, which is slightly bigger and rounder at the bottom of the frames.

And another picture up close:

Personally, I like the squarer Wayfarer II style, which I can't seem to locate anywhere online. But I did find this vintage sunglasses site that has a rare pair of the Wayfarer I wood frames for sale at about 6 times the original price. Around the start of eBay, I started to create a search filter for these frames and only twice in about 5 years did I get a hit. The first one was for a pair of "Woodies." I wasn't familiar with this brand, but I ended up "stealing" them on a last-minute bid from another eBayer for about $65. The guy or girl must've been pissed. I would've been. A couple days later, a woman asked if she could buy them from me for double the price. I didn't respond. These frames were actually slightly larger than the Wayfarer I style, but they were made of real wood and kept in a beautiful wooden case. Oh, the woman who asked to buy them from me also said that the frames I bought weren't very good and would break easily. I didn't know why she would offer to buy them from me for double the price I paid if they were so bad.

Those frames ended up getting stolen from my SUV after a homeless dude broke my window in downtown LA. I almost cried when I discovered they were gone. No, I did cry. I remember now.

The second time my search filter went off on eBay, there were a set of frames that had a high bid of well over $300 and going higher. I maybe would've bid $180 for them, so $300 and up was out of the question. I just did a search and found these frames sold for $500.

About 3 months ago, I did another search on eBay and found several vintage wooden frames up for auction, one of which I placed a bid on and won for $18 plus $7 shipping. They were in good condition, but just not something I would want to wear.

But then I did a general search online for wood sunglasses and got a couple new sites. Proof sells real wooden frames and so does a company called Shwood. Plus, they're new! So you buy them for the retail price and no markup. I bought a pair of Proof Boise Zebrawood frames with Polaroid lenses for $125 and they were great until I put them in my pocket while doing some shopping and broke one of the hinges.

As you can see, the frames are more square than the frames above, and they do look a lot more like the Wayfarer II style I like. The day before I broke my Proof sunglasses, I was walking down 3rd Street Promenade and a guy with a retail kiosk stopped me. He noticed my frames and wanted to see them. Turns out, his kiosk was for a company called Sire's Eyewear. He gave me his card, Wes Freitas was his name, and then he went to work studying my frames. He even asked if he could put them on. Impressed, he told me how they were cut and that they actually had wooden screws instead of metal ones. I actually hadn't noticed that before.

Wes said his frames were really popular and his biggest selling point was how unique wooden frames were. He knew about Shwoods but never heard of Proof. It turns out, this wooden frame thing really isn't so unique anymore. Go figure. The frames Wes sold weren't all wood, he later noted. They had a plastic backing, but then he went on to show why it was necessary. He said all-wood frames tended to break too easily. I'm not accusing him of breaking my frames, but I think he was testing them to see how strong (or weak) they were. Lesson learned: Never ever give your wooden frames to a competitor's salesman to test how strong they are.

I emailed Proof to see if they could repair my frames. They said to send them in and they'd check 'em out. Soon after, I got a package with some frames in them. These:

Yeah, I'm really not so fond of this color. It's almost yellow, and against my own "yellow" complexion, it's just not quite "it." Apparently, they were out of the Zebrawood frames, and 2 months later, they're still not stocking them. Ah well. I got these frames from Shwood on my shopping list:

They're $125 plus shipping. A guy can seriously go broke buying all these wood frames. I really gotta temper this obsession.

Kenny Choi in Captain America

2011-07-22T16:31:00.000-07:00

A buddy of mine, Kenneth Choi, who played my brother in a movie called Only the Brave, has a sweet role playing a Japanese-American soldier in Captain America: The First Avenger. I was very happily surprised to see that not only is he in the movie poster, he's also in the billing on the one-sheet, which I think I mentioned before is worth its weight in gold, especially at today's prices.

You can actually read an article on Kenny here in the Pacific Citizen, which is an odd publication. Why's it odd? Well, it's a newspaper paid for by memberships in the JACL or Japanese American Citizens League, and for some reason, it seems to cover a lot of entertainment stories about people who aren't Japanese.

The reason I'm bringing this up is that half the article was about Kenny Choi's ethnicity, which he refused (or refuses) to disclose. He had absolutely no problem playing my brother, but I think he wanted to make sure this JA advocacy newspaper wasn't going to start some letter-writing campaign against his casting, which I can totally understand. Another actor friend of mind, Bruce Locke, once had the role of a lifetime in RoboCop 3, only to have it completely diminished because of a letter-writing campaign by some Asian advocacy group. In RoboCop 3, Bruce played an evil Japanese character, which is absolutely fine by most Japanese, especially in the fictional realm, but not fine to this advocacy group. To avoid any controversy, the movie studio ended up cutting most of Bruce's dialogue and leaving in his action scenes.

I think I'm both grateful for these advocacy groups and wary of them at the same time. They've often done more to hinder the progress of Asian Americans being cast in film and TV than helped it, and I'll debate that with Guy Aoki to death if he'd like. (Look him up, if you want. He's really not worth the effort, in my not-so-humble opinion.) And I guess I'm none too fond of most of these advocacy types who take it upon themselves to change things without any sort of consensus on the matter. Want an example? Well, there was once a dig on actor Sung Kang on TMZ that seemed to irk some individuals. I really thought it was harmless and actually could've helped Sung's career, but man, someone went and phoned or wrote in to TMZ to take the piece off their website, and just like that, it was gone. I don't even know if it made it to their TV show or not. Sometimes, folks, we just got to let these things play out. For better or worse.

By the way, Kenny Choi did an awesome turn in a Priceline commercial not too long ago, which I'll post.

I'll just end this by saying I'm glad he didn't get screwed because of some ethnicity thing. In my opinion, he's a pretty good actor.

Michelle Yeoh

2011-06-28T11:38:00.000-07:00

On my Yahoo! homepage, I read this headline, "Hollywood actress blacklisted, deported from Myanmar," and I immediately thought of Patricia Arquette. Why? She did an independent film many years ago called Beyond Rangoon that was about the house arrest of Aung San Suu Kyi. And, of course, because she is white. Hollywood actress most often means white in America.

And then I clicked on the link and it turns out it's a story on Michelle Yeoh, who went to Myanmar to visit the former prisoner, apparently for an upcoming film role. I thought, "Wow, Michelle Yeoh, Hollywood actress!" Yeah, maybe you thought, "Wow, she's gonna portray Aung San Suu Kyi in a movie!" Me, I'm still on Maslow's lowest hierarchy of needs.

I met Ms. Yeoh when she was first entering her role as Hollywood actress. My roommate at the time was a photographer and he was shooting her for the cover of a magazine I was working for. I didn't do the interview, but I did get to be there for the photo shoot. She was lovely and amazing in all of her photos. I tell you, not a bad one in the entire lot! And she was professional and courteous. You could tell, she was going to be sticking around. And, oh, not a trace of a Malaysian accent, which I have to admit, literally causes my ears to bleed.

She had a firm, strong handshake, and looked you right in the eyes, not to eyeboink you, but probably to let you know she could Wing Chun your ass. She was also not young. I had to be about 10 years younger than her at the time, but now, it's as if I've aged and she hasn't changed at all.

About her photo shoot: She was as graceful as a ballerina or dancer, and knew how to move her hair and body. She was not afraid to be a fun and sexy woman, and she could own that in a moment's notice. No pose was like the previous one, and she was athletic too, yo. I mean, she could do the splits, lift one leg up in the air, or twirl her body around several times in a row, and look good doing it all.

Anyway, I just had to write all that. She just had that kind of impression on me.

A Career Update and an Ode to Roger Fan

2011-06-16T16:57:00.000-07:00

My little adventure back into commercials got put on hold after I got a job offer. It was too good to pass up. I probably could've rode out my unemployment just like the other 9% of the population, went on auditions, finished my novel, and worked on my golf swing, but damnit, I got a job offer. This was back in November, mind you, so I'm a little late in reporting it.

I work at a pretty good-sized ad agency now, way bigger than my last one. Not nearly as big as BBDO, but much bigger than BBDO West. We have some respectable clients, ones that shoot tons of commercials every year.

And so, yeah, I'm kinda sad about that. Because I see people I absolutely hate in some of the spots we produce. Unfortunately, I have little to no say on the creative direction of our talent. On the creative direction of our scripts, yes. But that's where my job description ends.

I got this job after doing some freelance work for the company just after getting let go from my last employer. Talk about dumb luck, the freelancer who normally does my job had to take an extended leave of absence due to, well, a death in the family. Not happy circumstances, I know. But I got the call, and then I got offered a full-time position once it opened up. No interview, no background check, just an offer and a welcome to the company.

It's been 8 months now and I'm starting to get the old itch again. Not that itch, the acting itch. I see commercials with the one Asian dude in it and I think, "Dagnabbit, I could've done that!" Then I take a sip of my $12 Costco wine and think, "Ah, regular employment's not such a bad thing."

Yesterday, I got to reading a blog from an old actor friend of mine, Roger Fan, and he's talking about how his two kids take up most of his time and energy these days, and he spends very little time working on his career. He said his career has been on a downward tilt ever since getting married and having kids. I'm not really sure what to think of this blog entry, as it sounds a bit lamenting about the kids and all. But I do like that he's being courageously honest, which is what all writers ought to be, especially bloggers.

If I could tell Roger something, it would be this: Hey, man, long time no see. You looking good still for a daddy of two. I gotta tell ya, you have got it good. Spending all this time in the early, formative years of your kids is a true blessing. My brother-in-law got let go from his job when his young twins were just born. He was out of work for two years, and in the meantime, raised his kids like a champ. Those were some of the best memories he's had since, because ever since then, he's been busy at work, and just recently saw his kids graduate college. "Where did all the time go?" he laughed recently. The time? It flew by while you work to build a career, or to hold onto one. There's varying degrees of that throughout a working person's life. Rarely is work something that truly serves a purpose, other than to keep you working. Paying the bills? Nah, because as humans, we all adjust to our circumstances. When my brother-in-law wasn't working, he didn't suffer. And neither are you, Roger.

But I know you know all that. You're no dummy. After all, you did graduate from an Ivy League school, come from a good family, married to a good, hard-working, smart woman, and you're not too fat to see your penis.

But you sat me down a long time ago, gave me some great information on how to become an actor, and I took it and ran with it. I owe my career to you, bud. But I'm not gonna lament not being able to act or do commercials right now because I'm working a steady job. Things change, jobs change, and people adjust. God plays a role in there, most definitely. But so does having the faith that you are doing exactly what you should be doing right this moment. God wouldn't have it any other way, in fact. But enough about the Big Guy. This is about you, Roger. The Fan Man. You do have a lot of fans, some 2,196 Facebook fans, last I checked.

I'll end this little convo by saying that I once interviewed the actor Robert Ito, of Quincy, M.D. fame. He said he had two kids, his wife, and he didn't know what to do with his life. He was struggling to make ends meet, even though he got regular background dancing gigs in musical theatre. And so he did what most sane people would never do: he packed all his things in the back of a VW Bug and moved his family to California to pursue an acting career. He had very little to fall back on, and he wasn't a young man anymore. He had two kids and a wife, all looking up to him. And that's what you need to remember, Rog. Ask yourself, what the heck am I gonna do now? If I don't do something, how will my kids survive, how will they look at me, how will they be able to go to college? And then buckle down, and make a plan.

In Praise of Despicable Behavior

2011-02-09T13:45:00.000-08:00

First of all, who am I to judge, right? I mean, I’m no saint. I’ve been bad. Very, very bad, if you really want to know. I still have my faults and foibles, temper flares, near barroom brawls, f-word frenzies, plus, I overuse alliteration.

Recently, I had a Facebook friend rant about Charlie Sheen and how just because he is successful, he can get away with his bad-boy behavior and still have a job, a No. 1 TV sit-com and network executives willing to cut him slack on holding up half a season of production. Is said FB friend a liberal-feminist-gay-rights-supporting granola from the Pacific Northwest? Sure, but that’s not the point.

The point is, I’ve been somewhat concerned about people’s perception of what is justified and what isn’t. Almost a year ago, I blogged about the Asian lawyer team on The Amazing Race and how whiny the Asian brother was being to his lovely sister. I titled the little rant “Stupid Asian People” and was done with it until Mr. Asian Community Supporter shot back, “By the way, those Stupid Asian People won $1 million on Amazing Race. So who's the the (sic) stupid one? The one that gives two examples of Asians and thinks that defines not only them, but also all Asians. That is just plain stupid.”

Is despicable behavior acceptable when you win a million bucks? Seriously, folks, I’m not being facetious here. Is it?

I know a guy who scammed his aunt’s boss for a million bucks under the guise of setting up a production company in California. The production firm ended up being his own million-dollar home with a matching Porsche in the garage. Yes, he scammed her. His wife knows, his family knows, some of his friends know. But he justified it by how? By being successful.

A former best friend of mine got half a million bucks by suing his former business partners after they broke ties with him. Unfortunately, that half-mil was gained by using another best friend’s business contact to invest that half-mil in the company, shortly before he was kicked out. Justified? Hmm.

Just a few weeks ago, I was talking to a very sweet woman about a mutual friend who was getting a divorce. The friend is an actor who had gone through a serious health issue a couple years ago, so serious that he probably could’ve died if his soon-to-be-ex-wife didn’t push him into going to a hospital. The story is more complicated than that, believe me, but the gist of it is that the very sweet woman justified the whole thing by mentioning “his career taking off” after they called off the marriage.

Sure, I know how the world supposedly works. I’m mature enough to know that good things often happen to bad people. But I’ll tell you this, and I’ll tell you a thousand times, I’d rather have one friend who is honest and true than a hundred who are successful and ruthless.

I’d rather live on an island surrounded by ants and coconuts than face so-called friends with slightly gray standards and ethics.

The whole Tiger Mom phenomenon? It’s been a viral topic for the past month or so. A writer who interviewed the subject of the viral voraciousness (see, I’m a putz for this crap) questioned openly on FB if Tiger Moms were specific to Chinese culture or to other Asian cultures.

I’ve come up with my own conclusion: It’s specific to Chinese culture. Why? Because much of China (not all of it) is full of corruption (copyright infringement, industrial espionage, government official quid pro quo, shortcuts to make an extra buck by using toxic substances in baby formula, using poisonous inedible filler in pet food), all justified by luck, fortune, success and winning.

Koreans do a lot of things, and it’s not all kosher, but family drives them to be No. 1, not success. Koreans are passionate, purposeful people, but it’s not typically because of a crazy drive for power. Vietnamese? Well, last summer, I edited an entire anthology on their struggle in America. They come from a war-torn country. Many are happy to just be alive. They often pray to anything and everything. But they work hard, end of story.

Japanese? Historically, we were among the most ruthless people in the world. Some of that generation still lives and supports the “republic.” But today, they’re lost, culturally, economically flat and directionally inert. It’s like their soul has been broken for many, many years. Success? Let’s just go for sustainability for now.

The Philippines are on the State Department’s list of riskiest (unsafe) countries. They have their own problems. And are often sending money back to the homeland, more than any other Asian ethnicity, for that matter. Plus, my boss is part Filipino. He’s not ruthless, he’s fearless.

Right now, I feel despicable. Why? Because I’m tolerant. Tolerant of people with agendas, friends who break promises, colleagues who stab you in the back, strangers in need who would seize an opportunity to scam you, and family members who would rather pay a caretaker than live in the same home as their father.

Sorry, the last one was kinda TMI. But that’s just how I’m feeling these days.

All Over NYC

2010-11-05T00:25:00.000-07:00

I ran into the makeup artist I worked with in July at church the other day. This was for the print job I did and the first photos went up live on the company website for about a month.

I mentioned to her about the website and she said, "Oh, I just talked to someone about it and the billboards are up all over Penn Station, Grand Central and Times Square."

"What," I said, "I was just there! But I never made it to those places."

Now maybe I'm just paranoid, but because I had to ride subways and trains during the entire stay, I kept thinking people were looking at me. My wife denies anyone even noticed us, however. She's probably a more reliable witness, so I'll defer to her.

The makeup artist also mentioned the billboards are somewhere near Union Square in SF, but I have no idea where you'd look.

It's actually an odd, surreal thing to see yourself in a poster or billboard out in public view. There's no ego or pride in this at all. In fact, it's mostly embarrassment because you never look as good as you hope or think you do. And since it's blown up so big, you see flaws in your face that you never seen before, even after all the Photoshop corrections have been made.

A few years ago, someone spotted huge photos of me all over a bank in a busy part of Boston. She saw my mug smiling at her from hundreds of feet away and the closer she got, the more she laughed. Since she was in my improv class, I'm presuming she was reminded of one of the skits we worked on together.

I don't want to sound bitter here, but I think for being so widely seen, I'm one of the least successful print models ever. I mean, shouldn't I have something to show for all this "fame"? Shouldn't this somehow parlay to my commercial acting career or to something more substantial?

Well, if not, then I'm just gonna have to live with the idea that somewhere out there in the world, at any given time, is my big face, smiling for all the world to see... and I hope you don't find it too offensive to view.

Union vs. Non-Union Auditions

2010-10-05T00:18:00.000-07:00

As noted before, I'm in that special category with the union where I can do non-union stuff without fear of penalty or reprisal. I can't argue for or against this category as it does carry some sort of stigma, especially with union members who haven't done this. If they figure out you do non-union stuff, they really can't do anything to you except talk crap about you, but you can expect that from most actors anyway, friend or foe.

I had a non-union audition last week, which I felt was pretty well executed. The project shoots next weekend up in San Luis Obispo. As it's non-union, I don't know how I'd get up there, other than the production company hiring a bus and taking the actors up there. If I had to drive, I wouldn't mind, unless they don't pay for the extra effort. But see, that's non-union. If it were union, you can bet they'd fly you up, and probably first class, which you could trade in for a cheaper seat and keep the difference. Being a weekend shoot, you'd get paid overtime, if not double time, plus per diem for incidentals.

Most union commercials are shot during the week, although I've done at least two on a weekend and they were very lucrative. Many non-union commercials are shot over the weekend because, well, they can and don't have to pay you one extra cent for it.

Today, I had a union audition, which I also think I did a decent job at, carrying the confidence I felt from the non-union audition into this one. Confidence is priceless, and I guess that's another good reason for doing non-union. You compete against mostly novices, the casting director knows you're union and knows you have experience, thus often recommending you to the client. But occasionally, you'll get cast in something that airs nonstop nationally and everyone thinks you're getting paid each time they see it. That's the really sad part of the equation. But I really do like going into an audition knowing that I have an edge over the competition. And I guess that's why I continue to see much more experienced actors, ones like Daniel Dae Kim, at auditions for national commercials: because they know they have an edge over the competition.

Tomorrow, I have a callback for the non-union job. I'd like to think I'll kick arse in that one.

I'm a Filmmaker!

2010-09-29T15:34:00.000-07:00

Well, sort of. You be the judge...

This first one is something I made on xtranormal.com. It refers to a stock that me and a few buddies have been following over the past two years. And it's a never-ending saga, hence the title: Wall Street: Wamu Never Ends.

Below is the promo video I made. It hasn't received the church's blessing quite yet; red tape and all, y'know? Well, since the program starts next Wednesday, I thought I'd post it anyway.

The actor is Brian Park and the voiceover is by Michael Kim. Sorry for the rough quality of the edit, but that was kind of the point of the vid. I really do need to study up on editing, among other things. But thanks for watching...

2,000 Complaints!

2010-09-20T11:19:00.000-07:00

LA Times reports that the Better Business Bureau is warning models of scam agencies that charge upfront for headshots or portfolios, yet offer few actual auditions. Over the past 3 years, the BBB has collected over 2,000 complaints. I'm surprised, however, that it isn't in the tens of thousands.

Back in my hometown in the Pacific Northwest, I went to a couple of these kind of agencies that required me to pay for photo sessions. That was part of the deal. No photos with their photographer, no chance at representation.

Unfortunately for those in Seattle, the opportunities are slim to none, so the agencies got away with it. I even went to an audition where the photographer wanted to charge me for "test" photos. I went for it, and yes, I was stupid, but at least the photos were decent. How much did I pay? $65, which was a decent amount of cash about 20 years ago. I've talked to a few others who came to LA from other hometowns and they had similar stories of checking out their local agencies, only to find they would pay more in upfront fees than they would ever make from bookings. The lucky ones saved their money and moved straight to LA. The unlucky ones wasted a few years getting had.

Recently, a neighbor asked me in the gym if I did some acting and he explained that he was thinking of getting into doing commercials on the side. I gave him my usual tips on headshots and getting an agent, but he was hesitant to do it because he had no experience. And then I told him to try it anyway.

About a couple weeks later, I found myself in the unusual position of having to direct a promo video for my church for one of the ministries I serve in. This may seem like small potatoes to you, but to me, the opportunity to challenge myself like this was too great to pass up. Plus, the HD camera I'd use would cost a would-be filmmaker quite a chunk of money. I somehow (God?) got the opportunity to write, direct, cast, shoot and edit my first video since college.

My neighbor also happened to go to my church, so I asked him to star in the promo. We shot it on Friday and I'm now in the process of editing — well, learning to edit — it. We'll see how it goes. I haven't directed or edited anything since college, so the learning curve will be huge.

But this video is a perfect example of how someone just starting out can get some experience under their belt. One, I needed an actor eager and willing to work for free. Two, you need some tape to show an agency, or just something to put on your resume. It's a win-win. As long as you're not doing something exploitive, don't worry about getting paid for it. If this person makes money on it without your talent release, you have cause to sue, given of course that this person actually makes money on it.

If I can get the video done by this week, I'll post it here.

First Union Job Since Being Back in Action

2010-09-07T11:33:00.000-07:00

I got booked on an industrial video that shot last week. These are vids that are instructional in nature and used to illustrate various work and corporate situations. I've done a few for Von's and Safeway, as well as one where I was supposed to have a Chinese accent, so I donned my best Bruce Lee impersonation.

This one was for a pretty established company that sells its videos to companies on a piecemeal basis and then pays its SAG actors a small percentage of the proceeds. So yeah, there's a potential residual income involved.

How much did I get paid for the gig? It was a half-day booking for me: about $306, plus $19 for the wardrobe I brought in, and a "plus 10%" for my agent. But I was there a total of 2.5 hours, 1.5 of which I spent reading a book I brought along, just in case. Makeup took 10 minutes, changing 10 minutes. I shot for about 40 minutes, did the scene about 5 times with another person in the scene, and then the director wrapped.

At then end, just before wrapping, there was something they had to record that my AD friend called "wild sound" or "room tone." Everyone stands still with the mics hot and they record about 30 seconds. And sure enough, about 25 seconds into it, some wiseguy farts in the background. Man, I almost lost it.

Praying for Bookings

2010-08-03T17:10:00.000-07:00

It's been a number of years since I've done this, and definitely things have changed, people have changed, casting has changed, audition notices have changed.

So when I see actors who I haven't seen in years tell me "You haven't changed a bit!" I get a little suspicious. I mean, sure, thanks for the compliment, but you can't tell me age has actually been so kind as to not have had any effect on me!

But there is a difference, and I'll be frank about it. When I started this blog, I had little clue about how long I'd last in this business. In fact, this was just a little experiment of mine to see how "the other side" did it, meaning the actors versus the writers. I still consider myself a writer first and foremost, and an actor not second but probably tenth in the grand scheme of things.

About three years ago, I met the right woman, well, Mrs. Right, and she got me thinking about what I believe in. And so I got baptized, in my 40s, in front of a great big congregation at a great big Christian church.

And so, now, I pray in Jesus' name for just about everything I do and hope to do, and that includes auditions, bookings, headshots, you name it, I pray for it, and then I thank the Lord for it afterward in gratitude. It's a crazy thing, well, for me anyway, knowing how big a selfish wretch I was before all of this.

In the 2 months since I've been back in the game, I've had at least 2 auditions each week, 3 callbacks and 1 booking for a print job that I can't really disclose. NDA sort of stuff, ya know?

What do I pray for? I don't often pray to get the job. I just pray for a really great audition, and I pray for God's beautiful light to shine down on me during it, so that I can look my best. But when I get close to the booking stage, that's when I get to being specific.

I just saw a couple of films as part of my Film & Theology course after church on Sundays. One was Stranger Than Fiction and the other was Book of Eli. I highly recommend them, no matter what you believe.

And if you should be curious about how I came to this crossroad, you can find me one place every Sunday, and I'll probably have some time to tell you all about it.

Maybe I Should Rethink This

2010-06-15T00:02:00.000-07:00

I got new headshots done and put a couple of looks up on all my casting sites last Thursday. Then on Friday, I got two notices from my agent for auditions on Saturday. Say what?!

The first one was for a promo commercial for a cable channel and the second was a print audition. Both castings were on the west side and around the same time. Score!

But here's the problem: I got to the promo audition at 3:45 expecting to be finished before 4:40, the time of the print audition. Unfortunately, the casting was running late, and there were 10 people in front of me. To make matters worse, we were all supposed to run our lines with someone who would play our son—and only a couple of kids showed up!

I kindly asked the casting agent if I could run to the next "appointment" and come back, but she snapped, "We're only running till 4:20." I looked at my watch and it was 4:10. Great. So I'm pissing off the casting lady and I'm gonna be late for my 4:40, because there's no way she's getting through 10 people in 10 minutes!

I have to say that it's a good rule not to worry, even when you're running late. Because when you worry, you're bound to piss off someone. And if you piss off someone, just don't let it be the casting agent. Fortunately, she was too busy to even remember what I had said to her, and she was perfectly pleasant while running lines with me on camera.

The print audition was at the Barrington Recreation Center, which I've been to for a softball tournament. Unfortunately, there are 2 Barrington Rec Centers, a block away from the other. I got confused and wandered around in the parking lot for half an hour before a pretty woman in a red dress smiled and asked if I was there for an audition. She pointed the way down the street and totally saved my butt.

By the time I got signed in and stood in line, I was a good 45 minutes late. But it didn't seem to matter. A dozen people got in line after me.

After the auditions, I was famished. My wife was in Orange County visiting her parents, so I told her I was gonna get a burger and beer at the original Father's Office on Montana Street. If it's in the early evening, it's a good bet you can find a seat there and I did, right in front of the TV at the bar. I was so happy, I even ordered a side of fries.

Back in Action! Out of Retirement!

2010-05-26T10:43:00.000-07:00

Seriously, I'm back in the saddle again! Wasn't really expecting it this soon, but I'm back in the trenches, next to the other aging Asian guys, trying to make a living out of this thing. And, oh, am I ready for it...

Then again... the headshots. OLD! My casting sites, wow, there are now three of them they use regularly. Casting Frontier, LA Casting and Actors Access. These things take forever to set up. But I sent an email to my old agent (Bobby Ball Talent Agency) asking if they were interested in submitting me again. Amazingly, they gave an enthusiastic YES!

Unfortunately, my first commercial agent, Brandon (Brando) Olech, passed away last summer at a fairly young age. He was great. The coolest guy ever. Gave me some of the best advice in the world, and was always encouraging, to say the least. He was representing some rock bands, the last I heard. I'll miss him.

I'm trying to schedule some quick headshots with my photographer buddy, but he hasn't returned my text yet. He likes to do that to me for some reason. Go figure. He's another aging Asian guy.

Well, maybe I can use these old headshots for a while. Just tell the casting agent I'm having a little cold or something.

Macho Like Helie

2010-04-20T14:51:00.000-07:00

The Los Angeles Asian Pacific Film Fest begins April 29 to May 8 this year, with films being screened in Hollywood, Little Tokyo and Koreatown. But being so removed from the Asian acting scene, I don't really know what movies anyone should see.

Usually, per the 6 or so times I've been to the fest, the opening and closing movies are the most popular, with a handful of interesting choices popping up here and there.

Author Helie Lee's Macho Like Me just might be one of those choices on May 5. The film stands out to me because I once participated in Helie's writing workshop and even ran into her documentary film crew on at least one occasion.

Helie, as a writer, is one of those live-it-first-then-write-about-it memoir types, and this was before the memoir was even popular. When she went to North Korea via China to rescue her long-lost uncle, I thought she had bigger cojones than anyone with a nut sac, including me. Especially me.

But when she brought up the idea of chopping off her long hair and getting butch for a documentary, I thought she was a bit, yeah, nuts. In fact, I told her so, and I think that probably fed her determination a bit. Okay, so I'm not particularly persuasive.

Now, more than a decade later, her doc is hitting the festival circuit and, frankly, I'm afraid to look. You'd think that after all these reality shows, I'd be jaded enough to watch something like this. Bored even. But no, I cringe at just the thought of it.

Yeah, I know what you're thinking. And I agree: I am (whatever you are thinking).

The festival's Opening Night Gala is at the DGA in Hollywood, and if you've never been to one, try to score a VIP ticket and get up close and personal with your favorite Asian American film or TV star. Believe it or not, there are actually quite a few of them these days.

Polanski's 'Ghost'

2010-02-22T09:54:00.000-08:00

It's unusual to go to a public movie theatre and only see Bernie Madoff types in the seats. Landmark Theatre is just such a place, and until recently, I didn't know how they could maintain such a clientele.

Last night, I saw The Ghost Writer at the Landmark, which, other than the Laemmle, is one of the few theatres in the city that show first-run independently distributed arthouse-type movies.

On the way up the escalator from the parking lot, my wife asked why I wanted to see the movie. I said it was because of a review from Kenneth Turan in the Times. She then asked what the movie was about, but I didn't know because I stopped reading the review after the first couple of sentences when he called it "Polanski's best work in quite a while."

After the movie, my wife wondered how the director could get away with filming at all the locations, since it's set in both the East Coast and the UK.

It's a great point, because to put those kinds of limitations on an artist -- i.e., shoot your film only where you can't get arrested -- is amazing. It reminds me of how my dad made me take photos as a young photography student using a manual-everything Nikon F without a zoom lens. I know it's a stretch, but you try shooting cheerleaders at a football game with a standard lens. It just can't be done!

The plot grabs you from the beginning of the movie, with Ewan McGregor as the Ghost as well as the perfect Everyman. Pierce Brosnan was excellent as the Tony Blair-like former Prime Minister Adam Lang, but the most interesting casting choice had to be Kim Cattrall in a British accent as Lang's executive assistant. I am sure her performance will be debated, but in terms of story shorthand, I have to applaud the choice. There's subtext to her role that would be difficult to understand without her actor backstory.

Mr. McGregor's assignment is to ghost write an autobiography for Adam Lang, or rather, to take an autobiography already written by the previous ghost writer and rewrite it. Thus begins both an adventure and a mystery, in which the protagonist unwillingly needs to figure out what happened to the previous ghost and why it happened.

I love how filmmakers these days -- Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds and Woody Allen's Match Point -- build tension and keep it tight until the very end, and Ghost is no different.

As for the Landmark Theatre and getting a seat, well, that's another mystery I'd like to reveal. You just have to know how to operate the system: purchase tickets in advance. How much in advance? Try at least one day in advance, as all the seats are reserved, and no one buys a seat in advance if it's for a seat in the first row.

But here's the thing. Bernie Madoff types get to be that way not because they spend money, but because they save it. So buy your passes in advance at a discount, then physically go to the theatre and use the passes to get the best seats in the house -- one week in advance! It works great when you watch a film and then buy your reserved seats for the following week. In the comfort of their stadium-style leather seats, it's just like having your own private screening room.

Something I Came Across

2009-12-29T11:09:00.000-08:00

I was copyediting a press kit recently and happened to look up Anjelica Huston on Wikipedia. If you scroll down on the site, you'll see a note about her personal life, including a long-term relationship with Jack Nicholson.

Just below that is a note about Roman Polanski's alleged rape of a 13-year-old girl. Apparently, the rape took place in Nicholson's home. The reason it's on this page to begin with is that Ms. Huston was a witness for the prosecution back in 1977, saying she unexpectedly saw both the girl and the director at the home after an impromptu visit.

FYI, Wikipedia could use your donation, so please send them a few bucks if you can afford it.

God Bless and Happy New Year.

2009-10-19T15:27:00.001-07:00

Wish I Saw This 20 Years Ago

2009-10-19T15:22:00.001-07:00

About 20 Halloweens ago, I dressed up as Michael Jackson, complete with white glove and jerry curl wig. I must've practiced those Thriller moves a million times, prepping for my Halloween debut. But the one move I never seemed to master was the most famous of MJ's moves, the Moonwalk. Ah, if only.

My New Hero

2009-08-11T15:46:00.000-07:00

My new hero, Roger Fan, airs his complaints about the Hollywood Establishment (HE) in a blog he and some colleagues have been maintaining. It's a must-read for any Asian looking to start a career in Hollywood as an actor. If you're already here, you already know this stuff, but it's enjoyable nevertheless. Of course, most of you actors will continue to take what little scraps are fed you anyway, but at least we can join along in the tirade. In fact, many of the comments are by other Asian actors.

Roger, by the way, was the one who helped me find my way in this business originally. He told me how to take a headshot, how to locate agents to send my headshot, and what to generally expect in this business. I totally respect Roger's path in this business, as he has done whatever it takes to achieve his level of success.

It does ring familiar, however. Back about a decade ago, an old friend, Steve Park, wrote a mission statement to the HE after a rather insensitive (and subtly racist) comment by an assistant director on the set of Friends.

Steve's statement was subsequently reprinted and rementioned about a million times until Mr. Park was forced to walk his talk by quitting the whole Hollywood thing and moving to New York. I miss Steve and his friendship, and I also miss his acting. He once asked me to write an editorial about his role in the movie Fargo, and I quickly obliged.

I just hope that Roger will retain some anonymity through his blog, as I doubt he intended for this commentary to reach as far as Mr. Park's did. Then again, maybe he had finally reached his limit.