Chicken Rice

FFD

2018-06-17T03:26:00.001-07:00

Fuckin Father's Day again

meaningless

2017-11-10T17:52:00.001-08:00

I find life quite meaningless. no real enjoyment or anything to look forward to. even work now to me is just probably a healthy, tiring and irritating way to distract myself from depression.

In Ecclesiastes King Solomon mentioned "meaningless" many times in reference to the pursuit of happiness. ‘A calm and humble life will bring more happiness than the pursuit of success and the constant restlessness that comes with it.’ - Einstein's humble quote, said it all. The King however enjoyed and tried everything he could try. He probably knew and concluded that life and in particular the pursuit for happiness is meaningless. However he probably was not negatively affected by it being meaningless, if we read the book in its entirety. Probably.

As for me, i am facing and feeling meaninglessness of life daily in the form of sadness, hopelessness, depression, etc. So by being irrated and tired by work, i escape them for some hours daily.

To wrong a right

2017-03-06T05:59:00.001-08:00

When a verdict is served to wrong a right
Let wrong judgement take its course

A bad deed leads to calamity
Where corruption isnthe foundations of their lives

Let the evil complete their evil course
And stoke the fires of hell, their next destination

So go ahead and sin!
Don't turn back no more.

So depressed

2017-03-03T20:54:00.001-08:00

First, car was hit from behind
On the way to station, car was hit in the front by some object that flung out from a lorry
Then was told i was in the wrong in the accident.

God you have humbled me

2017-03-02T04:31:00.001-08:00

Looking back at the 2 major things in life, family and career i suddenly think that God had humbled me. ( Even though i do not agree that i am arrogant or God unfearing)

To rejoice or to repent

2017-02-27T05:51:00.001-08:00

Are Christian values still practised today in the face of much challenges?

In the wake of extreme low birth rates, pregnancies outside wedlock are more likely to be celebrated than shamed.

Same sex marriages, gay and lesbian gaining acceptance.. progresively shrunk the issue of pregnancies outside wedlock into a trifle.

Well? Nosh for thoughts.

A lil' greeting a blooming amidst lazy predators

2017-02-18T19:40:00.001-08:00

A lil' greeting bloomed this morning
Amidst lazy cats and
a pack of baneful rats.

There are many cats and rats here.
But humans over fed cats them with cat biscuits n canned cat diet. This altered the natural food/predator chain.

Fortunately, the flowers still bloom in my garden.

Focus

2017-02-16T05:57:00.001-08:00

Focus in the present
Feel and grasp the power of the presence before you
Let the past lose its power over you
Allow the anger, bitterness, feeling of being short changed and all other negative emotions....
flow through your life
Keep yourself focused in the presence
Feel the brand new feeling around you
Everything in this moment is different than before
Savour it.

Perfection is Abnormal

2017-02-14T19:02:00.001-08:00

Perfection is never the norm

One more day to go

2017-02-09T05:39:00.001-08:00

One more day to go,
Seven days of rest to follow,
One more day will go.

2017

2017-01-31T06:33:00.001-08:00

2017 chinese new year shuffled through my bout of flu, sore throat and cough, which still subjects me to much suffering. Seems to be losing my voice again. The cough stubbornly lingers on.

Thankfully, other than that cny was uneventful.

But i have yet to sail through this episode.

Nobody will take pity of my share of woe and at most will just pay lip service.

I will stand up, wipe away my tears, stand up, smile and continue my walk.

The powers above seems to continously tear down the skies, land, buildings, vehicles, people and their minds.

There is no stopping to it now.

Better go to sleep now.

Hope... lost

2017-01-26T03:32:00.001-08:00

Once i held one Hope with both palms. I held Hope so dearly, scooped within both palms, close to my heart, with fear of losing them as well as with faith of it's full bloom one day.

Hope dropped off my hands inadvertently but with steadfast faith, i scooped Hope back into my palms. Torn and tattered, i held Hope even more dearly - recounting my mistakes and misadventures. Nursing Hope back was frought with uncountable despairs, cries and hopelessness. When Hope was nursed back to a state better better than its worst but scarred and significantly weakened than before, Hope saw another light. Faith soared high again! Holding Hope closer to my quickening heart, I stepped forward squeezing out every ounce of energy I could see from within my sinews. I soldiered on even more steadfastly.

But alas Hope 's light dimmed and my surrounding was dark and stormy. Pressure mounted. With even more strength and reserve resources, I spent them all for Hope. Then...a glimpse of starlight appeared..... for a few days.

The world fell on me ever since.

Hope was snatched off my palms only replaced with twin tragedies. Now in my palms are the empty shape where Hope once sat, through many storms and tunnels of lights. My heart now beats to absence of Hope. The third tragedy joined any dragged the Twins. The treesome claws, pulls, punch, scowls and hurls profanities at me all day long.

....

Ol granma shafting her...

2017-01-25T05:17:00.001-08:00

The ol gramma goes round showing pic of a day old baby sticking up the middle finger, still in the cubicle...
Showing family photo to practically while world
Maybe everyone unfriended her on fb.

So it's back to basics for her..
Shafting info down others' throats

Scoundrels of mean

2017-01-25T05:13:00.001-08:00

Another meaningless year beckons
So much pain and meaninglessness scoundrels around, messing head to toe, burying, scavenging, hurling profanities, a bulge of gross torso unfit to be called body throwing its shameleas self on to me, clawing into my life like I owed that scoundrel the entire world.

Pain, Frustrations

2017-01-24T06:37:00.001-08:00

God, thank you for all the pain.
I trust you it's for my own good.

Today the pain in my heart was clear but you placed the reason there at the same time.

The frustrations in my mind was annoying and evoked much anger in me. I trust in your plans.

I will go to bed early. You have overcome tomorrow's battles and i onlu need to trust you.

Thank you Lord. In Jesus' name, Amen.

mitsubishi. pajero sport VGT

2017-01-04T07:00:00.001-08:00

mitsubishi. pajero sport VGT
rm 177k

Target date : April 2017

Where is my Jasmine?

2017-01-04T06:55:00.001-08:00

😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢
😥😥😥😥😥😥😥😥😥😥
😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳
🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢
😞😞😞😞😞😞😞😞😞😞
😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖
😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔

Damn Fuck

2017-01-04T06:49:00.001-08:00

Fuck it
Fuck it
Fuck it

Damn it
Damn it
Damn it

Fuck it
Fuck it
Fuck it

Damn it
Damn it
Damn it

Damn Fuck
Damn Fuck
Damn Fuck

friday finally

2016-09-08T23:55:00.001-07:00

Hot, black tea over
Indian bread and
Chicken curry
On a Friday afternoon,
finally.

Blessings, Faith and Forgiveness

2016-09-02T21:51:00.001-07:00

God chooses who to bless and blesses who He chose.

We do not deserve nor is able to boast of anything by our effort.

I do not know what is God's purpose for me on this earthly life and neither am I sure I can accomplish it.

Dejected feelings and a deep, dark sadness weighs over my heart every day.

The obvious lack of faith in self and God.

Father please forgive me.

at the losing end of the battle...

2016-08-31T06:09:00.001-07:00

When I heard the question posed to my wife, I didn't feel much pain.
Instead I felt the passing bittermess and jealousy. It was just a feeling and nothing personal. I wasn't angry with the enquirer.

Like other similar scenarios, this experience made me question my own faith, question God and life. This experience also discourage me of any good in life and that u should live for the moment instead of aiming for eternity. It just makes me want to squeeze everything selfishly out of life and give up once and for all.

Such a typical strategy that works everytime - right Satan?

Meanwhile I am still at the losing end of this battle.

National #2 favourite question

2016-08-31T05:26:00.001-07:00

Q: "Do you have any kids?"
A: No.

Favourite follow up question to national national #2 favourite question:
Q: Is it planned?
A: No

National #1 favorite question

2016-08-31T05:17:00.001-07:00

Q: how many kids do you have?
A: zero. It's a number and it answers your question.

Gnite Mr Dee

2016-08-16T07:42:00.001-07:00

Gnite Mr Dee. I am not impressed that you have been a long term resident in my private abode for almost three weeks in a row.

But then again, I also suspect you have been around longer than that, perhaps years but your sneaky and rat-like ways eluded my detection so well that you seem more a visitor that resident.

But tonight my suspicion rose to a blue moon like one during high tide.

I don't want to think or worry about you now.

Hitting the sack, so... don't wait for me to complain to Abba about you ok.

Now be gone.

Bye.

Cannot be bothered

2016-08-09T21:22:00.001-07:00

I cannot be bothered about everything in life anymore
What's the point?
Who cares