MISTER WENDAL

A Christmas Pictorial

2012-01-05T20:53:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year all. Hope its been a pleasant and blessed one for y'all. I wanted to post about Christmas, but thought I'd do it a little different and post a pictorial instead to share a little bit of my Christmas.

The kids always look forward to bringing a Christmas tree home and decorating it. We've usually struggled to find an appropriate place for our Christmas trees, but our new apartment had a corner build just for one!

The Mrs every year buys a couple of pieces of Christmas decorations, usually during the sales on Boxing Day, when stuff comes down to as low as a buck. She then saves them for the following year. This year though, she got herself something she's always wanted to have before Christmas, the Nativity collection you see at the front of the fireplace. It took us a couple of days to have the girls understand that they were fragile pieces and not toys meant for them to play with. Still we'd occasionally find their dolls, Lego pieces, farm animals, and so on, that they'd added as part of the nativity !

'Twas the night before Christmas

One day, when the girls are all grown up, can read and discover this blog, they'll find out that - you guessed it - daddy's the one that drank and ate the milk and cookies they put out for Santa the night before Christmas, thank you very much.

They drew him a picture and left him a little note and gift too. I plead the fifth about what happened to the gift, but whatever it was had something to do with their mum. Uhmm, that's not really pleading the fifth is it ?!

The Mrs, my mum and I were up till 4am that night, wrapping presents and cooking for Christmas lunch. We had family round for Christmas lunch, about 20 of us in all.

A bright and sunny Christmas morning.

It's hard enough to wait for Christmas day at their age, let alone wait to open your presents on Christmas morning, so we let them open one present each before having breakfast. Cant remember the last time they ate their breakfast so quick.

She eventually got it open with help from her sisters

Grandma was pretty chuffed about what she got from the girls; a wood carving that read:

"If I Knew Grandchildren Would Be So Much Fun, I Would Have Had Them First"

"Mummy, mummy, Santa got Daddy 'Angry Birds' " - that's what they call the iPad 2, I got for Christmas. They've since spent countless hours trying to crack levels that need more strategic thought put into it than just letting the angry birds go crashing into obstacles. It cant be an addictive game though, that much I admit.

PS: Thought just crossed my mind - any followers with an iPad or iPhone, would love to FaceTime chat sometime. Now that would be awesome.

One of my brothers in Kampala called on Skype on Christmas Eve, and we were able to video chat with family back in Kampala, who being an 11 hour timezone ahead of us were having Christmas lunch while it middle of the night for us. He's got an iPad, but since I didnt know at the time I would be getting an iPad for Christmas too, I used my "junky" old faithful laptop (still use it more than the brand new laptop assigned to me at my new job). My mum's been here since just before the baby was born, so it was great for her and us to see and talk with family in Kampala.

Now here's the funny bit about this. Every time they'd pass the iPad down to the next person to say hello, all we'd see was their ear. On this side, we kept telling them to face the camera so we could see them. Except for my brother that started the call and one sister, every other one of my cousins, our youngest brother thats just finished high school and my dad (he's excused with reason - he missed the bus on the technology superhighway. Its his age you see!) kept on showing their ears. I didnt get it !!

It later occurred to me that since they could only hear our voices and not see us - like I said, my old junky but faithful laptop is just that. Its old and it doesnt have an in-built video camera. Anyway, they couldnt see us, so they kept treating my brother's iPad as some kind of gigantic phone and putting it to their ears to speak, instead of facing the iPad itself and letting its camera capture video of them so we could see them while they speak.

True story !

Lastly, here's a short video I took just the other day before we brought down our Christmas tree - this is what happens when your mum thinks it'd be a fab idea to put you under the Christmas tree like you were a gift or something. Well, you are, but not in that manner, if you know what I'm saying.

Hope you all enjoyed your Christmas. And here's wishing you all, a truly blessed New Year once again.

SANTA's on Speed Dial

2011-12-23T02:51:00.000-08:00

Ever noticed everyone's phone number in the movies is always a 555-something number? Hollywood that is - I'm not aware if there's a standard in Bollywood or Nollywood or as I've recently come to learn now exists, UgaWood. Area code 555 doesnt exist, except in Hollywood, and I think it also serves a secondary purpose reserved for that kind of plonker that will hear the number and think to himself "I'ma go ahead and call Halle Berry right this minute here. Yeah, I'ma do that." You muppet, all you're going to hear the other end of the line is "Your call cannot be completed as dialed ..." C'mon man, you're never going to get Halle Berry on phone.

I thought of using a 555-number to mess around with my kids' little minds. This time of year they are more cautious about being naughty or nice. It's that threat of being on Santa's naughty list and missing out on Christmas presents that puts them in check. A little while back I told them I had Santa on speed dial, so he's only ever a simple press of a button away on phone and I'd have him on the line letting him know how naughty they've been, so be sure to check those lists twice and have their names on the naughty list.

Knowing that calling a 555-number wouldnt work with my a-little-smarter-than-I-sometimes-think kids I needed another plan that would sound a lot more real while I was on the phone around them. The risk of them hearing the "Your call cannot be completed as dialed ..." error message would straight blow away the authenticity of my "Santa's speed dial" story and the one easy excuse I've got to have them on their best behavior for at least a month.

Daughter #2 is old enough to recognize the word "SANTA" even though she cant read much else yet. So I took my phone and their mum's and created a "SANTA" entry in them for a number I still remembered for a phone in a server room located in the basement at my old job that nobody's ever around to pick up. I should've added a profile pic to the SANTA entry, for maximum effect, but I'm only just thinking of that now - 2 days shy of Christmas. I've showed them that when I hold down the "0" button, "SANTA" pops up on the screen and they hear the phone dial. It rings for a while before eventually going to voicemail.

I told them that Santa's busy wrapping presents, crossing-checking his lists, and making sure everything's ready for his busiest night of the year when he delivers presents, that he doesnt always have time to answer the phone, but he sure does check his voicemail.

I had them wrapped around my finger.

The result has been nothing short of hilarious for the most part.

Today after finding herself in another spot of trouble after I'd repeatedly asked her to behave herself without response, I told Daughter #2 "That's it, I'm sick and tired of you not listening. I'm calling Santa right now"

She immediately collapsed to the ground, wrapped her arms around my leg and pleaded "Nooooo, nooooo, Daddy, please NO. Dont call Santa. I promise, I will behave myself soonly."

"Soonly", I think was her combination of "Soon" and "Quickly" in the heat of the moment.

I did end up hanging up the phone, and feigning how upset I really was with her, but inside I was really dying of laughter. After asking her once again to behave herself, and her promising she'd never be naughty in the world ever again, I quickly (soonly !!!) excused myself and went to have a good laugh in the bedroom.

How I wish I could continue with this after Christmas.

Have a Merry Christmas everyone. Enjoy yourselves, and do stay blessed.

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Away ... 208 miles away

2011-12-19T23:09:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting in my little room in the only Inn in this remote town - a three & a half hour, 208 mile drive away from home. Its remote. Very remote. No hustle or bustle of Los Angeles. There's no traffic - heck there's barely any traffic lights, just a handful of stop signs. I realized yesterday after driving out here, that strangely enough I missed the traffic on L.A's freeways - the jams are absolutely annoying to be stuck forever in, so I must have been straight outta my mind yesterday to be missing that.

I'd forgotten what it was like to drive on an isolated highway, in complete darkness after sunset, and only the occasional distant light of another small 5-street town.

On the other hand though, I liked the wide-open spaces - but only momentarily. I'm so eager to get back to Los Angeles and hopefully I dont have to come back here. My new employer (havent gotten round to blog about that yet !!) sent me out here to a client site for a two-day installation job. If ever there is motivation to complete everything within the two days I was given and not leave myself in a situation that would need a return trip, then its the very thought of having to make this trip again.

Here's a few shots to give you an idea how remote I'm at.

Sunrise in the middle of nowhere

Deserted highway

Middle of nowhere, for real

The client's site

Meanwhile, being out here close to the California-Arizona-Mexico border, the Inn service is very basic. I got back to the Inn from work at about 7:45pm and the Inn's dinner service was over. I drove around the little town looking for any place that sold food - a restaurant, a diner, a fast-food, but there was nothing. I found a small store next to an abandoned gas station, that didnt really have much of anything worthwhile to eat. I left with a Kit-Kat and orange soda pop. That made up the whole of my dinner in middle of nowhere tonight. They best be serving the complementary breakfast tomorrow morning or I'ma find somebody's horse and eat it !

Being this close to the Mexican border, the majority of the programming on television is US Latino channels and a handful of channels from Mexicali, Mexico. There's the usual ESPNs, ABCs, NBCs, and what-nots to watch, but there is something about the tele-novelas on Latino channels that got me watching one after another after another after another. It seems to be all they screen.

And what is it about telenovelas and beautiful women? There's not an ugly one in any of the ones I've watched yet and I've watched quite a few already. Ah well, enough of this. Time to get myself into bed. Cant wait to get back home.

Meeting Mike Roe..."Again"

2011-12-08T22:16:00.000-08:00

A little over a year ago, I wrote a post about a soldier that I met in Columbus, Ohio, at the airport, called Michael Roe. You can read the post here. We were heading to the gate to catch the same flight, but our destinations were worlds apart. We chatted briefly and I learned he was deploying for another tour of duty in Iraq. I was honored to speak to someone, like himself, who place themselves in harm's way for this country's sake. Long after our flight had landed and I was waiting for my connecting flight, I realized I never did find out the unit he was serving with, so I was never able to keep track thereafter of how they were doing or when they were coming home or anything else.

Anyways, I found out very recently, in the oddest of ways, that he made it back home safe. How? Well, for those of you that haven't gone to the post yet, but still want to know how, then just go to the post right here, and follow the comments. The answer's right there.

Although I havent met Mike Roe, in person again - that's Michael, actually, not Mike - I'm glad to have made contact with him again, and to know he's back home. In reality, him and his girlfriend are the ones that found me and made contact !! I found out too, from himself that is, that he served with the 225th Brigade Support Battalion (225 BSB), based outta Hawaii.

If you happen to read this Michael - and even if you don't - Welcome Home.

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Still clueless ...

2011-11-20T21:53:00.000-08:00

Hey all. I'd love to throw out a bunch of excuses why I've not blogged more often in recent weeks, but that would be a whole post before I get to anything I want to really blog about. But as you can imagine, its been busy times at home since the baby arrived, regardless of the fact that we have an extra pair of hands and a wiser head in the form of the girls' grandma around. Blogging time has been hard to come by.

One of the more interesting revelations is that third time round we still dont know what we're doing. If babies came with manuals, then we'd have three different copies, with a 2nd and 3rd edition for the older ones. Yep, its different every time and the family dynamics, if I may call it that, change with every new child.

Coming in at number 3, with a 6 and 4 year old sisters, right now to us looks like she's just going to have to grow up that much more faster than they themselves ever had to. They dont realize their own strength when handling her, they have a ways to go before learning to hold her without letting her head flop about like a rag-doll, they also have to remember to pay more attention to her when they're holding her and less attention to the TV. There've been times while seated on the floor (its the safest place, with good reason !!) with their baby sister on either one of their laps, then something "fun" comes on the TV, and being the interactive kind of programming they watch, they quickly roll her off leaving her in a crying heap besides them while they get up to dance, jump, giggle, whatever, along with whatever it is they were watching on TV. Thats not something we ever had to know with our first baby, or with the second baby, since our first at the time wasnt not as excited as they both are now about carrying a baby in their lap.

The first two weeks we slept less than we expected. And it wasnt because of the baby. To our amazement, she slept very well during the night - thats since changed much to our disappointment. Unfortunately, our 4 year old wakes up at the crack of dawn on any given day. Her older sister will sleep till 11am if not woken up. Those first two weeks they'd creep into our room at different times of the night "to come check on the baby" they'd say, and consequently wake us up. They'd be back around 5 in the morning to have the baby wake up and play. Which meant a crying baby whose had her sleep interrupted and the other two running out the room coz they'd gotten a reaction from the baby they didnt expect and a worn out mummy and daddy not very amused.

.... (4 hours later) .... unfortunately, like I mentioned earlier in the post - or did I? - but blogging time has been hard to come by. Its been 4 hours since I started this post and I've since lost my train of thought since my last paragraph. So instead of saving this has another draft and never coming to it again, I'll just post as is. Adios, till later.

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It's a girl

2011-10-23T23:00:00.000-07:00

Hello people. Been a while, but believe me when I say that its been mad busy the last couple of weeks. But, I'm back; with a new addition to the family. Since my last post, we welcomed a baby girl into our family. She came right on time (and yes, she really is African despite that !!). Not a day earlier, not a day later. After my last post, it was all rush to the hospital. She'd be born about 15 hours after my previous post, on the afternoon of October 5th.

We named her Amani, which in Swahili means "Harmony, Peace".

Its been hectic ever since. Thought I'd have time to blog about her, but time wont give me time. Although she sleeps well, she's got her day and night switched.

I'll just leave you with some few pics of our daughter, and try to get back to blogging a bit more frequently hopefully sooner rather than later.

Amani - 6 Days old

Her sisters are super-excited to have a baby sister around, most especially our now middle daughter, who simply couldnt bare the long wait for the baby to arrive. The thought of being a big sister herself thrills her to bits

Having a moment with their new baby sister in hospital

Closer look and closer smell of baby

How much hair does baby have?

2hours to due date ...

2011-10-04T23:14:00.000-07:00

... you'd think having done this twice before I'd have a fairly good lock on knowing when labor is in process. The Mrs is definitely struggling right now. We went to her doctor Monday for her regular weekly check-up and he figured he'd schedule us for a cesarean if the baby wasnt born Wednesday - her due date. We personally hate scheduled births - no disrespect to those that have them - everybody has their own reasons for why they choose the way they decide to have their babies, but we've always preferred things to happen naturally. The last time we definitely could have opted for an induced labor on her expected due date, because that date so happened to be the Mrs' birthday & my mum's birthday too. A mum, wife, and daughter on the same date - fantastic right ? Well, we opted not to, and our second daughter arrived a day later.

Anyways, we got back home and last evening I got the Mrs walking. They say it helps bring on labor, and we've got proof of that with our first daughter. 6 years ago, her doctor encouraged her to take a long walk to bring on labor. We did, and about 8 hours later she went into labor. So I had the Mrs walk about a half mile yesterday. We only quit when we did coz she was so worn out. She struggled with anything the rest of last night after that. But no labor.

Fast-forward to a couple of hours ago - looks like she might not make it past the end of tomorrow. We'll see. Mum, who's a former midwife, believes she's in early labor. Her movement is certainly labored (no pun intended. Oh okay, maybe a little bit), and in the last one hour she's been wincing eyes shut-tight in pain every 20 mins, so yeah, maybe this is it.

For now, she's up watching NBC's "Parenthood" - anybody else watch that? She got me watching it last season, and apart from "Modern Family" and the football or NBA, is probably the only one thing I watch on a regular basis on telly.

Anyway, forget it. I'ma sign-out right now and who knows, maybe next time I'm on I might have a worthwhile post for you guys to read! I got to get her bag, camera, camcorder and all in the car.

Last update - 45 mins to due date - she seems to be having "real contractions" every 10-15mins now. And my dumb ass is here blogging away. Gotta go.

6 days to due date ...

2011-09-29T23:57:00.000-07:00

... baby's 6 and 4 year old siblings-to-be asked me, while we were driving back home today, if they could "please please please" get a puppy. "Why?" I asked. "Well, because little babies don't really play when you just get them, but puppies do."

Help's on its way too. Packaged as "Grandma". Matter of fact, flight status for the airline, says she's in transit in Amsterdam right abouts now.

7 days to due date ...

2011-09-28T22:34:00.000-07:00

... and I finally assembled the baby's crib. How is it that something, someone, so little needs a bed that half fills a room? The other half is filled with things that individually could fit in my back-pocket. Well, not all of it really, but a whole lot of it for sure. Either way, a happy wifey today.

Remembering 9/11

2011-09-11T23:55:00.000-07:00

September 11, 2001 is one of those kind of days you remember where you were or what you were doing when a monumental event in either your part or some other part of the world happened.

10 years ago today I was working for a US agency in Uganda. Late that Tuesday afternoon I stumbled across breaking news on the CNN website while browsing around. A plane had just slammed into the World Trade Center in New York City. I walked into my boss's office - a big American guy from Georgia - and asked if he knew about any airport for light aircraft around the Manhattan area or at least that would have Manhattan in their flight path. He asked why and I told him coz CNN had breaking news about a plane having just crashed into the WTC. He didn't know of any. He wasn't that familiar with New York City, besides, he was from Atlanta. We chatted a while, probably about the Braves, then I walked out.

At that point, my curiosity with the initial news was from the point of view of an aviation enthusiast. I couldn't imagine how a plane could crash into a skyscraper however tall it was, unless maybe it was a combination of very poor visibility due to bad weather, and flying very low probably because the aircraft was on a landing approach to a nearby airport. I assumed it was a light aircraft, maybe a Cessna-sized, definitely not a twin-aisle passenger aircraft.

Not too long after that, my boss walked out of his office and asked how many planes I said they were. "One" I replied.

"A second plane's just hit the second tower." He's face had since turned a pale white. It was evident then that this was more than just a coincidence. I mean, two planes, hitting the twin towers, minutes of each other ?

I remember I'd only minimized my web browser hoping to get back to the CNN website for more detailed news about the crash. By the time I maximized my browser again I was just about the only person in our part of the building that could get to the CNN website coz I had my browser open to their page around the time the news had just broken and I had only minimized my window not closed it. Everyone else was having trouble opening up the website or any other news site, because just about the whole world that had now heard the news and had an internet connection was flooding their sites with requests. It was strange, coz that was my first experience as an IT professional of a DoS attack, which essentially is what all that traffic had unintentionally caused to the website. Neither CNN, the BBC, or other news sites 10 years ago had the capacity to handle that many requests to their websites at the same time.

Strange as it may seem, but that's been one of my lasting impressions of that day. That, and the horrified somber looks on the faces of my boss and all the other Americans that worked in the agency that day.

Years later, after moving to the United States, I've since come to better understand how tragic a day September 11th has really been to a lot of Americans, not just on that day, but since. I only discovered late last year that the colleague I work closest with had a dad in one of the twin towers. His dad had retired from the Navy several years ago, but had found work in the World Trade Center where he was on that day. He'd gotten out alive. He'd made his way down and out the building after the first plane struck and saw the second plane strike the second tower.

Today, apart from watching football almost all afternoon, I watched a few remembrance documentaries on telly. It was amazing the stories of personal sacrifice the first responders put themselves through. CBS had this one particular documentary whose initial footage was shot before 9/11 ten years ago. The filmmaker had been following the working lives of one particular fire station in Manhattan. They responded to the tragedy at the WTC, and unlike so many other stations in the area, every single fireman returned to the station at the end of that long day alive. The sad bit about it, is that 2 of them have since died from what is believed to be cancers related to the toxic dust they inhaled from working on the Ground Zero site without proper masking to protect them.

I have a far greater appreciation for the first responders without a doubt.

It was great to see every football arena in America today on NFL opening weekend pay remembrance to those who died in New York, Washington D.C/Virginia, and Pennsylvania, as well as honor all those serving in America's military and the over 4000 that have died fighting in the two wars that have been a result of this day 10 years ago.

Always remembered.

3d sneak peak at baby

2011-08-29T00:24:00.000-07:00

Intrigued by the idea of 3d/4d ultrasound, we opted to go ahead and schedule one this past week. There's no medical reason for it, its if I may say, just for the fun of it. 15 minutes gives you the "pleasure" of having a sneak peak at your baby in a way that regular 2d ultrasound offered during regular monthly checkups with your doctor does not.

You walk away with a bunch of stuff too - DVD recording of your 15 min 3d visit, CD and print of your baby's pictures and oh, did I say they do charge you for this service. Oh yeah, this is not something your medical insurance covers. Afterall, there is no medical reason for it.

Here's a handful of 3d pics of our baby I thought I'd share. We went in at 34 weeks, which we were told is a bit late to get clear pictures, since baby has long run outta space and chances were that hands or feet or both would be pressed up against the face, or baby's face pressed against mama. They offer you that information before you make the decision to part with your money only to be disappointed if that indeed does turn out to be the case, despite their best effort to make baby move about. The dark spots you see (3rd & 5th pic) are baby pressed up against mama. But anyway, here are a couple of pics.

Thumb sucking

Asleep

Didnt want to be bothered: Kept pressing against wifey's belly

to make baby move about a bit, but got this reaction instead.

Back to sleep again

A brief smile

"The Thinker"

When a strip-club's the best option

2011-08-21T20:18:00.000-07:00

I've witnessed, with much amusement (sorry mamas), the early stages of pregnancy having mum-to-be closely hugging the toilet bowl throwing her guts up; and the later stages finding her pressed and running around constantly needing to go pee like real urgently.

My pregnant Mrs found herself in dire need to go. Again. Which wouldnt have been so much of a problem if she was home or some place comfortable with easy reach of a CLEAN bathroom. But she was at a BBQ out in the park that didnt have any convenient public bathrooms. And she needed to go real bad.

You'd think small businesses that usually have bathrooms open only to staff or clients would make an exception to special cases, but not too many do. With a nod of the head they just kept waving her on, until she walked into this one place where an open door followed by two thick dark drapes, a couple of feet from each other, opened up into a huge dimly lit room. It took a while for her eyes to finally focus on what was around her and boy did she get the surprise of her day.

The first thing she saw was ~~half-naked~~ near naked women lap-dancing for a handful of patrons. The one bright spot of light that there was in the entire place led her gaze to a stage with pole dancers and strippers going about their trade. Her initial surprise turned to curiosity once she realized what she'd just walked into.

But she was probably no more curious than one of the staff who couldnt help but wonder what an 8-month pregnant woman was doing in their strip club. Maybe chase down a philandering husband !

By the time he approached her to satisfy his own curiosity, she'd long figured out she'd unknowingly walked into a strip club, but she was more worried about getting to a bathroom if he'd let her, than where she was. Turns out he ended up being the most helpful person she'd come across over the last 15 minutes searching for a bathroom she could desperately use.

I picked her up a few minutes after that. Wait. That sounds silly. But its not what you're thinking. I did not pick my wife up from a strip club. I picked her up from the BBQ a little after her experience.She was still giddy about it.

She'd expected to find near naked strippers in the bathrooms adjusting their make-up or something. She didnt. She breathed a sigh of relief, coz she thought it would be the most awkward of situations to walk into a bathroom full of fine-figured women while she looks like a whale - her words, not mine.

And their bathrooms were the cleanest she'd seen in any club she can remember and had the most comfy chairs she'd sat in in any club too - yes, she took the time to enjoy the "comforts" of a strip club while she gathered herself. I know. I gasped out in disbelief "..you actually sat down in the strip club to enjoy yourself ..."

Ladies, if you ever find yourself in the same dire situation, well, here's proof that strip clubs, or "Gentlemen's Clubs" as they're preferably called, might be your next best option. Just be sure that you're evidently pregnant (my disclaimer) and your experience might just be the same. If your not, then your presence might not be all that welcome. Unless of course you are a stripper.

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My beautiful little liar

2011-08-06T00:26:00.000-07:00

Lately our 3 year old has taken to telling lies, which we all did as kids, but has long ceased to be funny when you're on the other side of things as the parent and trying to police bad behavior. We all told lies (and still do!), I mean, who as a kid didnt tell their parents a bunch of lies, especially to get outta trouble. Sometimes I look straight at my kids as they tell the most blatant lie and instead of getting angry at them, I'm flashing back thinking "Oh. My. Goodness. What a numbskull I was!" while wondering about what my mum must have been thinking as I told the most see-through lie - quickly followed by an ass-whupping. See ma, was old-skool African. She didnt play when it wasnt time for games.

The thing with my daughter is that she could lie her way through a lie-detector test. At 3 years old. She puts on a straight-face, doesnt flinch during cross-examination, sticks to the same story no matter how damning the evidence thrown against what she's saying, and no threat of punishment seems to break her into changing her mind. She sticks to her story no matter how weak it is.

This morning, I asked her if she'd brushed her teeth. "Yes, daddy".

I asked if she was sure about that. "Yes I am daddy."

When did you brush your teeth, when you just came out of bed a minute ago and have been playing around in front of me the whole time, drinking my apple juice behind my back, and asking to watch TV when you know all too well you're not allowed to watch TV in the morning.

"I did" was the short reply.

Well when did you, I countered. "When Jasmine was brushing her teeth"

"Hazel, are you lying again? You better tell me the truth now, coz you know I'm going to ask Jasmine since you said you brushed your teeth when she did."

"I am telling the truth"

Sure enough on asking her sister if they'd brushed their teeth together, the sister said she hadnt even brushed hers yet, she'd just gotten out of bed. Again I asked 3 year old if she was lying about having brushed her teeth. And with confidence so resolute she insisted that she had.

"Your toothbrush is dry". Still she insisted she had and she was telling the truth.

"Your bathroom sink doesnt have a drop of water around it" - "I brushed my teeth daddy."

"The toothpaste is back where it should you. The both of you always leave the tube of toothpaste lying around open and your mum is forever tearing her hair out telling y'all to put it where it should be when you're done. You want to tell me you used the toothpaste and put it back where it should be?"

"Uh huh."

"Stop lying, you havent brushed your teeth. Why wont you tell me the truth about something so simply like this. Your not going to get into trouble for forgetting to brush your teeth again, but you will for lying."

"I'm not lying. I brushed my teeth"

She was straight lying through her teeth, but none of the evidence I threw at her to prove that she was lying made any sense to her, so she didnt see the point I was trying to make in any of it. Trust me, I know my kid, and I know there was no way this morning, in the short time she'd been outta bed upto no particular good and me asking her, that she'd actually brushed her teeth. NO WAY.

Still she got away with it, coz this one time I honestly didnt know what to do.

Wifey might be onto something smart that we're hoping breaks this early trend. She drew up a chart on an erasable whiteboard, with three columns, one each with their names and another for each day of the week. Every good behavior today, she let them stick a colored star of their choice. Each bad behavior she drew an "unsmiley" face. The target she set for them was to have 5 stars by the end of the weekend with a yet unknown surprise as a reward. 5 "unsmiley" faces would elicit a yet unknown punishment.

My the time I got back from work at the end of the day, our 3 year old had picked up one "unsmiley" face already. But here's where what wifey's idea might work. Hazel was in the middle of another lie when her mum reminded her about the unsmiley faces and the stars and how she was going to have 2 unsmiley faces before the day was even done. She changed her story quickly, apologized and pleaded not to have another unsmiley face added to her column for Friday.

Tell me people. How would you handle this little spot of bother before the behavior becomes a pattern. I have to admit sometimes its funny listening to the silliness of the lie that I have to separate myself from the situation to have a laugh by myself and remove the smile from my face before going back to address the issue, but its really not funny at all!

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The tiny Mexican fishing village

2011-08-03T23:07:00.000-07:00

A boat is docked in a tiny Mexican fishing village. A tourist complimented the local fishermen on the quality of their fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

“Not very long.” they answered in unison.

“Why didn’t you stay out longer and catch more?”

The fishermen explained that their small catches were sufficient to meet their needs and those of their families.

“But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

“We sleep late, fish a little, play with our children, and take siestas with our wives. In the evenings, we go into the village to see our friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs. We have a full life.”

“We have a full life?” The tourist interrupted, “I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat.”

“And after that?”

“With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles , or even New York City ! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise.”

“How long would that take?”

“Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years.” replied the tourist.

“And after that?”

“Afterwards? Well my friend, that’s when it gets really interesting,” answered the tourist, laughing. “When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks and make millions!”

“Millions? Really? And after that?” asked the fishermen.

“After that you’ll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children,
catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends.”

“With all due respect sir, but that’s exactly what we are doing now. So what’s the point wasting twenty-five years?” asked the Mexicans.

And the moral of this story is: Know where you’re going in life, you may already be there! Many times in life, money is not everything.

“Live your life before life becomes lifeless”

The "Carmaggedon" that never was & losing the World Cup

2011-07-18T12:36:00.000-07:00

Media has a way of blowing things up a whole lot worse than they really are. The whole “Carmaggedon” (a term the media made up to promote the whole idea that driving in and around LA over the last weekend was going to be Armageddon because of the Interstate-405 closure for a whole weekend) thing frankly speaking turned out to be not too much of a big deal.

We love our cars in Los Angeles no doubt. The saying goes, that if its more than a 5 minute walk away, then we’re driving there, is fairly true of your average Angeleno. Its no surprise then that we also bear the unfancy title of "traffic jam capital of the world" – I’m not so sure how accurate that is, but oh well.

Truth be told though, driving on the 405 can get nasty any day of the week.Any trip on the 405 has me add on an extra 45mins plus, for the just-in-case situations – like another idiot tearing down the 405 with half the California Highway Patrol and LAPD chasing him thinking he’ll realistically make his way to the border and cross into Mexico. That kind of drama that the media again feel is so much more entertaining that they’ll interrupt their programming on telly just to show us a car chase.

I think Angelenos probably are amongst the last to find out about real “breaking news” coz a lot of the time we’ve gotten used to hearing “We interrupt this programming to bring you breaking news…” only to be shown live footage of the kind of idiot I just described above getting his 15mins of infamy. Usually a whole lot more really. So the moment we hear those “We interrupt this programming….” words, we just turn off the telly and go do something else. Unless of course you get a phone call from another Angeleno telling you to turn the telly back back coz some "worthwhile" (or not) celebrity’s done gone lost they damn mind and's being chased down the freeway by the CHP.

So carmaggedon, for those not really aware what it was all about, was the shutting down of the 405 freeway for the whole weekend of July 16-17^th, to allow for partial demolition and repair of the Mullholland Bridge as well as expansion work on a 10-mile stretch of the car-pool lane. The 405 runs along the western areas of Greater Los Angeles from around Irvine in the south, past LAX International Airport, and into the San Fernando Valley, where millions of us live. I'm spared from having to use the 405 to get to anywhere daily, but hundreds of thousands of others do and I don’t envy them.

An LA City Councilman went as far as boldly announcing “Stay the hell away” during a televised speech by the mayor and his staff about our impending nightmare. Although, I must admit, they had more faith that it wouldnt be as bad as the media was predicting life was going to be for us.

So what were Angelenos to do this whole weekend? We were going to be depressed. We couldn’t drive our cars. We couldn’t have the police chase our asses down the freeway on our way to Mexico. We couldn’t get to grandma’s. We couldn’t take our kids to Chuck-E-Cheeses. We couldn’t take our Pitbulls and Chihuahuas walkies along Venice Beach. We were going to be stuck in our homes for 2 days doing nothing but drinking 6-packs of Bud and watching commercials on telly all day.

Give me a break. Its July summer right abouts now and it seemed to me like we pretty much did whatever we wanted to do.

Los Angelenos CAN live without the 405 for 2 days without losing our minds about it either.

Anymore than 2 days and we probably would have though !!!

A huge thank you to the construction crews that beat their schedule and reopened our beloved cant-live-without-you 405 a whooping 17 hours ahead of time. Just to let you know how grateful we are, I was on the 405 late Sunday afternoon, heading to North Hills, on a trip that in all honesty we could have saved for any other time, but well, you know how it is. The car dealership that sold us our car a couple of years ago was having a "Carmageddon Weekend" special car sale with a free-for-all BBQ, so we figured we'd head out there to see what options we might have for a car upgrade, and coincidentally the 405 was our best option to get there.

On another note, I got into work this morning, and was preparing myself my regular morning cuppa in the break room, and a bunch of co-workers were bitching about Team USA losing the women’s World Cup final yesterday to Japan. Yes, people, believe it or not, but Americans are actually bitching about soccer more than you might imagine. They were well pissed too about the way USA lost the final too, not just the fact that they lost.

With a handful of minutes to go in extra time to claim their third World Cup trophy, America conceded another goal. It was a beautifully worked goal too. Japan had come back again to tie the game, and they took the game into the dreaded lottery that is the penalty kicks. But this was Japan right, not Germany, so America had as good a chance as Japan to win this. Plus, we had a great goalkeeper too. In the end, Team USA fluffed two of their spot kicks, with one ballooning way over the crossbar. And just like that Japan had ended USA’s amazing run to the final. But with that being said, Japan had had an amazing run themselves, and good on them, they deserved it just as much.

Baby name search

2011-07-14T17:59:00.000-07:00

You’d think 9 months is plenty of time to find a name for your unborn child, but it turns out that it isn’t. We’ve been at it for a few months now, but cant agree on any names.

With our first child, we tossed around names, dismissed a lot of them, agree on one, stick with it for a few days, then change our minds about it again. We eventually locked down on a name about 5 months into the pregnancy. It was a girl’s name and she didn’t consider any boy’s name coz she felt 100% sure it was going to be a girl, even though we never found out the gender till our daughter was born. We aced that one right?

With our second child, the search lasted much longer, and we only agreed to a name the night before she was born. We’d locked in on a boy’s name a few weeks earlier, again, because this time she felt 100% sure it was going to be a boy, so getting her to agree on a girl’s name, just in case, was a lot harder. It turned out to be a girl.

I work with someone who has the most peculiar story about how he was named and the present-day complications he’s having to deal with because of how long it took to name him. Lets just call him, Spade – his surname that is. He’s parents hadn’t agreed on a name by the time he was born. A day or so later when the nurse (or maybe the social services worker, whatever) came round to take name details from his mom for purposes of birth certificate and all, he’s mom said she didn’t know yet what she wanted to call him. So the nurse/social worker instead asked what her surname was, to which she answered “Spade”. Social worker leaves the room and files details for his birth certificate.

They never did go to get his birth certificate coz he never needed it to get enrolled into school or apply for social security and everything else later in life that requires forms to be filled out.

Fast-forward some 30 plus years later, he decides he wanted to travel out of America so he goes to apply for a passport, which required him to present his birth certificate, which he was able to get from the responsible office without a problem. He hands over all his required documents and application at the post office and the processing person takes a look at it and says the birth certificate and what he’d filled out and handed in the forms were two different people. When he finally decided to REALLY take a look at his birth certificate, his jaw dropped. His official name was “Baby Spade”

For whatever reason that social worker/nurse had all those 30 plus years back, she didn’t wait on his mom to decide on a name, and she went ahead and filled out “Baby Spade”. Maybe she’d filled that out as a place-holder to remind her to return to his mum later and ask if she’d decided on a name, then maybe she forgot and sent it along, or someone else had picked up the forms and hadn’t looked at the forms, and just sent them along. Who knows.

What we all know is that he’s officially named “Baby” on his birth certificate. He’s been back and forth between government offices to get the whole mess fixed. Forget the fact that all his other records, including most importantly, his social security, have him listed down by what we know and call him.

Laughable as it is, he’s in a spot of bother coz he cant travel outta the United States till he can get this resolved. He’s also had a whole lot of explaining to the social security office to convince them he didn’t steal nobody’s identity just to get a social security number.

It would seem like one of those little things you take for granted that you needn’t think twice about. I mean, who writes “Baby” on any birth form as the child’s official name. Anything else goes. People name their kids anything from brand names of luxury cars to names that need a couple of lines or even sheets of paper to complete, so the social workers or whoever is responsible for working with you on these finer details don’t ask too many questions.

When our second child was born, the social worker asked me if the last letter in my surname should really be there or it was just an error. See, if you knock out that last letter, then my name looks and sounds like a Latino name. She also just happened to be Latino, as a great percentage of L.A. is. When I told her no, its exactly as I wrote it down, she went “Oh. You not Latino then? I thought you were Latino?”

I’ve been ID’d as Tunisian by a Tunisian, Ethiopian by a lot of others, even Somali, but never Latino, strangely enough yet, by a Latino themselves.

So here we are, at Week 28, and we’re still name-searching. To make it more complicated or fun, whichever you look at it, unborn baby's bigger sisters have their own baby name ideas. Most of them sound like names you'd give your pet dog or cat. Some maybe not. Many are cartoon characters.

No "Spongebob Squarepants", thankfully enough.

Daughter's voicemail message

2011-06-30T00:28:00.001-07:00

"Daddy? Hello? Well, first of all, we love you. Now can you bring us those, uhm, cookies. The ones with cream in between, with jam on top, and lots and lots of sugar sprinkled on them. Mummy wont let us have them, but we know you'll get them for us. OK? See u later daddy. And, uh, dont come back home if you dont have them."

That was my 6 year old daughter's message that she left on my voicemail earlier this evening. I didnt know who I'd be in bigger trouble with - her and her sister, if I didnt take home the cookies they were craving, or their mum who evidently doesnt like those particular cookies for a reason, and the girls know it too.

The Word on Facebook

2011-06-22T18:35:00.000-07:00

Just the other day - think it was yesterday matter of fact - one of the bloggers I follow wrote an interesting post about iPhones and church. Not necessarily that people tap away on their gadgets all sermon long, but that with a Bible app one can now read their bible off of their iPhone instead of carrying around a bible. Personally, I havent tried that coz i dont have an iPhone, but if I did I probably would, simply because of the convenience. Coincidentally, I've barely seen its use in our church, but the Pastor on the Easter Saturday evening service, did whip out his iPad to read the bible from. He'd just gotten it as a gift from one of his kids, I think he said, and he was pretty chuffed about it too.

That said though, I dont have a very good bible reading habit - for every reason I can give under the sky. I've tried the daily bible guides but I'm usually several days behind a fortnight into it, and before I know it, I've given up on trying to catch up. Ain't it strange that as Christians we can easily make time for every other pursuit in life, but finding time to spend in the Word is like taking the Chemistry exam in your high school finals all over again - at least to me it is. We'll spend countless hours on YouTube (guilty!), Facebook, Twitter, video-gaming, channel surfing when there's clearly nothing interesting on TV, watching 6 hours of Sunday football and another 3 on Monday night (btw, I've seen on ESPN that the NFL lockout might be over soon and we might have a full season afterall) <----see what I mean?! Finding that 30, 15, or even 5 minutes to pick up a bible and spend time in the Word though always seems to be a challenge.

A while back I came across the "The Bible" page on Facebook, and I "Liked" it - gosh Facebook! Its since been so much more easier for me to get my (almost) daily read of the Word. Pastor Mark Brown who maintains the page, provides frequent updates with verses taken from the bible and I just find it so so much more easier to read the bible that way.

Today's reading came from Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.

That was an appropriate verse for me today, and totally felt God was speaking to me on a personal level, especially in reference to stuff that's been weighing stress on me lately. Just as the verse says, I'll lean not on my own understanding, but trust in Him.

In the middle of losing myself in the daily grind of life, and not finding the discipline to commit time to picking up the bible, I'm sure glad to know that even when I least expect it, I might be on Facebook and the Word finds me!

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Where I've been lately ...

2011-06-21T01:11:00.000-07:00

Been away from here for what seems like forever lately. With good reason though. Or at least I think so. Life’s been so fast-paced recently that every time I think I’ve gotten a moment to sit down I’ve just stared at the screen in front of me and didn’t know where to start. Eventually I’m all “Ahh, forget it, I’ll get back to this later.” And never do.

Since so much as happened recently, that I cant post about every single thing, I’ll just give you a basic run down of events in the recent weeks.

1. The company I worked for was acquired. Weirdest acquisition I’ve heard of yet. It took two companies to come in and break apart the one I work for, or used to work for, with each taking the divisions that made business sense to them. It effectively split the team I’ve been working with for the past 3 years into two, with the majority of them going one way, and three of us going another way.

2. Got real disillusioned with the new company. Seriously considered quitting, made my resume public on Monster and started taking calls from recruitment agents.

3. Changed my mind about quitting, coz it seemed the new company eventually realized that my colleague and I did exist and they actually stroked our egos by making us feel that we were real valued and were desperately pleased to find they’d "acquired talent" like ourselves – ha. Huge ego stroke that was.

4. The other company that bought the biggest share of our old/original company realized they’d acquired a huge bunch of network and systems assets, but that the network engineers that run the infrastructure – my colleague and I – ended up with the other company (the one that had acquired us), since we belonged to the business portion that they were never interested in in the first place. They made no secret of reaching out to see our interest in crossing over to their side with offer of better opportunities and pay. They had me seriously reconsidering. Another ego stroke. They had me seriously reconsidering my position.

5. We discovered that we were expecting a baby. After the heartache of the miscarriage towards the end of last year, this was exciting news. At the same time, we've been on our knees constantly praying to God for a full term pregnancy and another healthy child.

6. My colleague and I got kicked out of the offices we were in – apparently because the space was now owned by the other company that had acquired the other part of our original company. Bear with me. I know it can get confusing. It was done in the rudest way too. They cut the fiber to our floor, effectively disconnecting us from the rest of the world. Meanwhile the company that acquired us, which didn’t know we existed in L.A – they all along thought we were in New York, because that’s where our immediate supervisor sits – well they didn’t have any where to sit us, so for the next two weeks we both worked from home – or at least attempted to work from home – my kids thought I was on holiday so didn’t give me a breather.

7. I paid another $1400 for my lab exam – 'twas so painful to hit the “Confirm” payment button, coz I knew I could be doing a lot of other stuff with that money (and time) had I not failed previously. Have since put my head down again and lost myself into late night studying, early morning studying, and all-weekend-long studying. I’m worn out with preparing for this exam. AGAIN. Cant wait to be done. Still have a couple more weeks to go.

8. Watched the Lakers get humiliatingly knocked out of the playoffs by Dallas. Was little consolation that Dallas eventually went on to win the NBA Championship.

9. Got through the first trimester with all news pointing towards a healthy pregnancy. Praise God. Decided to break the news to the girls about a new addition to the family. "Are we finally getting a dog?" they excitedly asked. Our 3-year old has been besides herself ever since then about becoming a big sister and asks the mum on a daily about if today’s the day that the baby is "coming out". Her older sister is constantly concerned about how the baby's car seat is going to fit in the car, if the baby's bed will fit in their room, and where's the baby's place going to be on the dinner table. She’s also got a new name for the baby everyday. They both want a baby sister “because boys do not know what they are doing” they say.

9. Once again considered finding another job as the disillusionment with the company that had acquired us kept growing stronger and stronger by the day.

10. My baby girl turned 6. Hooray. Love you much mi corazón.

11. Changed my mind again about quitting. Realizing that much as a lot of the days I feel frustrated with where I’m at, I’m still in a good situation considering how much of my time at work I can control with studying. Moving to a new job would throw that study time and a lot of other things out the window. Have since made up my mind to just hold on till I’m done with my exam, passed it, then take it from there.

12. My wive’s sister – there’s only the two of them in their family – flew in from Kampala, with her husband, two boys (10 and 8) and her daughter, 3. We hadnt seen each other since early 2007 when we were last in Kampala. We had 4 adults and 5 super-charged kids in our apartment for 3 weeks. I’m surprised that the neighbors below us didnt complain.

13. My nephews kicked my ass on the Playstation frequently. Considering that I have a Mrs that is seriously not interested in gaming and two kids whose motor skills need a lot more developing yet to better handle the controls, I hadnt had a challenge in like forever till these two came along. They owned me most of the time.

14. Went to Disneyland. Yaaaayyyy. Breaking the news to the girls that we were finally going to Disneyland was like them waking up in the middle of the night and finding Santa in your living room stuffing every gift you asked for under the tree. I was declared the “best dad in the world”, given the tightest never-let-you-go hugs ever, and had the wettest kisses planted on my checks. We’d been buying time over the years about going to Disneyland, giving whatever excuse seemed reasonable at the time, hoping that they’d grow a bit more so that they’d really enjoy the experience. With family around from Uganda, now seemed the perfect time. And it was well worth it too.

The Matterhorn Bobsled ride at Disneyland:

My daughter was pretty freaked out for the better part of

the 2-minute ride, but insisted on going back again about an hour later

15. My wife’s sister and her family left after three weeks. She went into a semi-depression for about a week. Separating the two of them always leads to this.

16. Have been looking for a new apartment for several weeks now. Didnt renew our lease with our current place. Wifey has been wanting to do this for 2 summers now, but never found anything that worked for us. It turned into a near nightmare.as we failed to find a decent place. With our time fast running out, wifey finally relented and went to ask the management company to extend our lease on short term - they'd previously offered this, but she'd declined. When she figured taking the offer would buy us more time to find a place, she was told that our apartment had already been leased out to a new tenant due to move in soon as we move out on the date we stated when we handed in our notice. Essentially, we were due to with a place, homeless if you like, effective Tuesday, the 21st. We were reduced to just finding anything that was out there, just so we had a place to live, which meant we’d possibly find an apartment that was even worse than what we had since considered ours to have become. Well, actually, the wifey, not me necessarily !!

Glory to God though, we found a place at the tail end of last week. A much better place. Bigger, and yet a little cheaper rent-wise, with better finishing inside and the all important central air-conditioning. The summers in our apartment were a major cause of distress for the Mrs. It doesnt have central air-conditioning, so 95 degrees outside felt more like 110 degrees inside. The one air-conditioning wall unit the apartment has, literally only cools the area around it. Stand like 3 feet away and its no good. She couldnt take it another year.

Still they wanted us out the apartment by Tuesday, yet the other apartment wouldnt be ready till Monday next week. We had about 6 days in between homes and we didnt want to move our stuff into storage for just a couple of days, then go stay with family, or even want to stay with family, then have to move our stuff out of storage again into the new apartment. Too expensive, and too much of an inconvenience.

But by God’s favor, as wifey negotiated our present apartment's management to make a couple more days available to us to stay longer than they wanted us to, and the other apartment's management to bring the available entry date closer, God knit the two, and praise to him, we’ll be moving out of one apartment straight into another apartment, in literally the same neighborhood on the same day. I hate the drama of moving, and this episode has been no less dramatic than any of the previous others. The very reason I hate moving house if I really dont see a reason to.

In a nutshell, that has been my life over the last couple of weeks. Adios, and hope to post more frequently than I have been lately.

Sending Emails To The Wrong People

2011-05-19T23:34:00.000-07:00

Have you ever erroneously sent an email to a bunch of people that had no business receiving the email? I discovered today just how stupid you feel. The moment I clicked "SEND" I went "Wait. What the?" I literally smacked myself upside my head. Even though I knew there was no way I could "unsend" the email, I still looked for the option.

To my credit - and I think I'm just trying to make myself feel less stupid - I wasn't talking ill about anybody or anything.

Our daughter turns 6 next week and we've been planning her birthday party. Unlike her small preschool class, where she'd invite everyone, her kindergarten class is much larger. Of the 24 kids in her class, she's really only excited about having a handful of them at her party. Works for us too. Fewer kids from school, means a less expensive party. She still has loads of family, some of whom can throw a hissy fit if not invited! Too political with family. You know you're African when there's way more adults at a kids party than kids themselves. Lol !

Anyways, her class has a yahoogroups email list with every class parents' email address and its used for communication concerning the class or school. Strictly. Nothing else. Because my daughter's invite list keeps changing by the day I wanted a class list so that we could run down the names one by one, and she'd 'Yay' or 'Nay' every name I read out. I knew just the person who'd most likely have that list - her best friend's mom who helped build the group's contact list. She didnt answer her phone so I figured I'd just email her instead. I found an email that she'd sent out to the group and used that to compose my email to send out to her. I'm usually very, as in very very, disciplined at removing all email addresses of people who have no business reading any email responses till I'm done with what I'm saying and deciding whether or not to include them back in on my response. Not this time.
Instead of blanking out the "To:" field, I just went ahead with what I wanted to say, although the salutation was directed to her specifically, I hit send, and it went to everyone. There and then I wished there was an "unsend" feature build into email technology.

Like I said, there was nothing ill said towards anyone, but there was implication that not everyone's kid in my daughter's class was being invited. In all honesty it shouldnt be an issue. Nor is it an issue I'm even fussing about. Not everyone has invited her to any of their birthday parties or wont when they have theirs, so they probably wont see an issue with not having their own kid invited. Some probably will. Tough luck.
My issue is that I know better about broadcasting information which should be unicasted instead, and I hate the fact that for whatever reason (I was working on 3 hours sleep over the past 36 or so hours. No, seriously, I was when I sat down to type out the email) I saluted the email to one person, but sent it out to a bunch of people.

My consolation ? Technically, it wasnt me that sent out the email. I signed out as my wife, since she had me use her mailbox. Her email is the one on the yahoogroups class distribution list, not mine, so she gets the emails not me. So, anyone that wants to bust a spleen over a petty issue have the wrong guy.

Huh. I feel better already !
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R.I.P Paul Kim (First Love) - You'll be missed by all

2011-05-08T23:24:00.000-07:00

Its been almost two days but I'm still sort of in a daze. A friend of ours passed away on Saturday afternoon. It happened all too soon. He'd been fine when he traveled from Uganda to the U.S. a week ago to join his wife for the birth of their first child, a daughter, due in two weeks. One minute I was reading up on social media that he was in hospital in a bad way but no more details about what exactly. I figured I'd give him, if he could speak, or the wife a call, but didnt have a contact number. A couple of minutes later after getting a number I could get a hold of his wife on I called only to be told by the lady that picked up the phone that he'd just passed on like that very minute. As in they'd just broken the news to them in hospital while I was placing the call. Shocked is an understatement.

Paul Kim - you'll be dearly missed by everyone that knew you. May God rest your soul in peace and strengthen your wife, Olivia, that you've left behind, and your unborn child. We know you're in heaven, because we know that you loved the Lord with all your heart and your praise for him was always on your lips.

I don't have a recent pic to share, but the pic below was taken on Boxing Day, 2005 when we had a couple of friends over at ours, including Paul Kim and his then fiance, Olivia.

Paul Kim & Olivia

Paul's sudden and unexpected death is one of those kind of events that quickly sorts out for you what's important in life and what's really not. A day before that, I learned that one of the ladies we spent Easter twith a couple of weeks ago - I'd not met her till then, but had heard about the generosity of her heart - I learned that she'd since that day been told by her doctors that they'd discovered cancer in her body and it had spread to four different organs. She'd gone to see the doctor on an altogether different matter.

All that news in 2 days is enough to make me pause and be a whole lot more appreciative of what we've got in life. Tomorrow sure isn't guaranteed to any of us. And I hate to think about that, but it just is the reality. Take a moment to look around you and be thankful to God. I'm not saying settle for less, but enjoy what you have at the moment and ask yourself if some of the things you really make a big deal about are really that much of a big deal.

Once again Paul, may you rest in peace. And may your memory live long after last Saturday.

Lamb's Choir, Church On The Way - Easter Saturday

2011-04-27T18:02:00.000-07:00

Feel like I've been away from blogging for a lifetime. Oh well. Haven't had much to blog about lately. Hope you all had a great Easter weekend and didn't just binge on food and drink all weekend long !!! Actually, who am I to say? We spent Easter Sunday, with my cousin and her family, binging on food at The Cheesecake Factory in Sherman Oaks. It took forever to get us seated even though we had a reservation, but once we were it was easy to see why it took that long to find enough seating for our group. Everyone there seemed to eat to their heart's content and end up too darn loaded-up with food to want to get up and do anything else but digest. The food was great, and the variety of cheesecake that we I ate was even better. I love cheesecake, so I was easily sold onto whatever kind was ordered.

Before the food though, the girls signed up for the Lamb's Choir at the church we attend, and performed on the Easter Saturday service. It was supposed to be for 4 year old's and up, but my 3 year old walked up to the stage just as they were assembling for last minute practice and she did alright we figured. You can see from the videos below that she does occasionally lose track, but then again I dont know if that's coz she didnt have enough time to learn all the words, or its just her 3 year old mind momentarily wondering off, as 3 year old minds tend to do. She's the one in the black and white skirt, front row towards the right, between the taller boy and girl. Her sister is a row back towards the middle.

Child Of The King

Jesus Loves Me

Hope your Easter was reflective of why we celebrate it in the first place. He is risen. Have a blessed week.

The folly of childhood - the insanity of boys

2011-04-04T00:59:00.000-07:00

My mum once said raising boys was one panic attack after another. When I look back at some of the stuff my brothers and myself got up to, I cant blame her for that statement. She was always yelling out at us "Oli mulalu?" meaning "Are you insane?"

One Christmas, 1984 I remember it was, my parents bought us BMX bikes. They were like the coolest gift we'd ever been given. My younger brother and I didn't know how to ride at the time, but a week later by New Year's Day, our older brother had taught us how. From that time on, my mum wished they hadn't gotten us bikes at all. We were constantly hurting ourselves trying to out-do each other with stunts we saw on TV. Doing the basic wheelie (riding with your front wheel off the ground) wasn't enough. We'd try to see who could pop a wheelie the furthest distance. We'd ride with no hands, try lifting the whole bike off of the ground, or worse yet attempt mid-air 360 twists. Those last two would get us into all kinds of nasty falls.

My mum was constantly beating our asses before bandaging us up, coz poor lady had told us off more than once about the reckless endangerment to our own selves for attempting stunts we had no business attempting. Back in the day, there was never any "DO NOT ATTEMPT THIS AT HOME" warning with every crazy thing they showed you on TV.

We quickly learned to bandage ourselves up, and kept attempting the same reckless stunts that got us hurt in the first place, but from anywhere that wasn't in front of our mum's watchful eye. Usually out in the street with the neighborhood kids.

Riding out on the street was her other nightmare. We lived on a fairly quiet street, but that wasn't enough to ease her fears that we might one day get run over. The more likely thing that could've happened, that she was never aware about and why, was getting bitten by a dog. When we weren't up to bike stunts or racing ourselves up and down the street, we'd ride off with the other neighborhood boys, a couple of streets farther - all the neighborhood mums hated us doing this, but we did it anyway. Mums have hawk eyes - even when we thought they couldn't see us, they could, so anywhere farther from them we felt was safer for us to get up to no good !!

We'd ride off seeking out a neighborhood dog we were not familiar with and taunt it to the point we felt it was pissed off enough to chase us off its property and hopefully a lot more farther than that. We'd all be at the ready on our bikes waiting for that moment, then soon as the dog charged we'd race off hoping not to get caught. Occasionally we'd come across a dog that would give chase for about 10-15 seconds, which when you are super-freaked-out at the thought of getting caught and bitten by the dog, feels like a lifetime. Those gave us the best feeling. A brain-dumbing mixture of fright and excitement.

We'd reach the end of the street and come to a halt when the barking had stopped, looking over our shoulders to be sure no one had been caught or much less mauled by the dog. That's when we'd feel the shake in our knees from the fright of the experience. It was an adrenaline rush for us as kids. That's probably what made us keep seeking other dogs out and doing it again and again.

When my brothers and I werent out on our bikes, we were kicking around of throwing balls. On one maddening week for my mum, we broke windows at home on 3 consecutive days. One of them we broke twice. The first day we got off a bit light. That particular day I kicked a ball way too high over my older brother, it hit a window. Smash. We quickly turned ourselves in and apologized like our mum always wanted us to do. And she let us off light - we considered a verbal mouthful light. I think half the time none of us was really paying attention anyway. The next day my younger brother broke another window while throwing a tennis ball at us. We had this game where the one of us with the ball would try to hit any other on the head with the ball. No other body part counted. You hit him, then they're it and so on. We'd moved this game to another part of the garden thinking it was safer. Same result. We all got an ass-whupping that day. On the third day when my older brother this time broke the same window I'd broken two days previously, and that my dad had had replaced the day before with the one my younger brother had broken, we just all broke the hell up out of there soon as we heard the smash. Worse still we got back home way after dark stupidly thinking anybody angry at us would've calmed down. We got a major ass-whupping that night.

We also jumped off the garage roof at home. Mum never caught us doing that. It was easy to get onto the garage roof from the back of the house, coz the garden there was raised. Then we'd make our way to the front, and try to see who could leap the farthest from the top. It was about a 10 foot leap to the bottom, but for boys about 13, 9 and 7 at the time, it was enough to hurt us bad if we screwed up our landing.

We played around with electricity too. We grabbed a frog once, and my older brother thought it would be a good idea to see for ourselves what really happens when someone or something gets shocked by electricity. He put together some wires and wrapped the crude assembly tightly around the frog so it couldn't escape, then stuck both ends of the wire into a power socket in the garage. He asked us to stand back, then he proceeded to blow out the power at home when he flipped the switch on. We grabbed our evidence and run for it. Nobody ever suspected us so we got away with that too. Not sure how he never shocked himself.

My dad used to smoke when we were kids. Think we must have been about 10 and 8 when I took my dad's lighter - his favorite too - an odd kangaroo lighter that lit a flame from its back. But anyways, my brother took a bunch of white ream paper from my dad's desk in the study room he had, and I lit it up. The speed with which the paper burnt caught my younger brother by surprise and he dropped it on the carpet which also caught fire. Probably the one sensible decision I can ever remember us making whenever we were in a spot of trouble was then, when we ran to tell our mum about it and she took the fire out. Oh yes, we got an ass-whupping. No questions asked.

The most dangerous thing we ever did though, and this really all depends on whether the guy involved in this incident was telling the truth or not, but it was this one day when this guy invited my dad and all of us over to his sheep farm. I remember after a lot of walking around his farm, my brothers and I walked into his living room while the rest were all still chatting outside with the farmer. Something led my younger brother to get onto the floor and stretch his hand underneath this one sofa. I still cant remember if it was a ball or something that had rolled under there that he was trying to retrieve. Instead he felt around and dragged out a shotgun. When he realized what he had pulled out, he let out a cry of amazement that got our attention. We'd never seen a rifle that close and sure enough we all wanted a closer look. My older brother muscled his way to it and lifted it up and said how it was heavier than he ever thought a shotgun was. The other two of us tried to grab a hold of it too, and in the middle of the bickering over the rifle everybody else walks in and my mum was absolutely petrified when she saw us fighting over a gun. My older brother being the smart ass that he was quickly let go and it remained in my arms along with my younger brother who had his hands on it too.

The farmer quickly took it away and swore how it was safe coz it wasnt loaded but either way none of us should have been playing with it. I cant remember what my mum and dad said, but it was a lot. I remember the farmer that owned the shotgun trying to explain how he kept it hidden but evidently not well enough from boys our age. And also him saying he kept it to kill wild dogs that attacked his sheep.

That one time, is the lone time I remember the "you could have been killed" phrase being used and I actually realized how dead serious the situation was. Maybe because it was a gun, and not we guys recklessly riding our bikes on the street while looking over our shoulders at a chasing dog.

The drive home was the most frightening ride I'd had in my life to that point. We were totally scared about what would happen to us when we got home. My parents were angry all the way home. Dad and mum kept yelling over themselves trying to get their point into our heads. I cannot remember anything they said just coz of the state of fright I was in.

We got ass-whuppings. My dad never ever gave us ass-whuppings, but my mum did. She was so mad that day, that my older brother that got it first got it bad.

I dont have any sons. At least not yet I dont. And my daughters are still way too young to get into any kind of the reckless trouble my brothers and I got ourselves into, but I can tell you this, I seriously pray to God that they dont. I know God kept an eye over us those times our boy brains shutdown, and I pray he does everyday over them too. And that they never do they stupid stuff we did.

My sisters never got into any of the kind of trouble we got into. And my missus hasnt got a scar on her body, not even a scratch from a fall, unlike myself that has a different story to go with each scar.

Is the way boys are wired naturally make us predisposed to such folly ?

What kind of foolish things did you get up to as a kid? And how much and what can a parent do now, to stop their own kids from the stupidity we got into as kids, especially the outright dangerous, as in the possible life threatening ones.

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Cruella de Vil, the Substitute Teacher - the followup

2011-03-30T13:48:00.000-07:00

The streak is over. Unfortunately. My daughter walked straight past me yesterday when I picked her up from school. No hello, no hug. Just stormed right past me. When I caught up with her and asked her how her day at school was, she ground to a halt and turned around to face me with stiff straight arms held close besides her body, clenched fists, and absolute annoyance written all over her face.

She finally said she had gotten a yellow and she so hated her teacher and none of this would have happened if I had just let her stay home like she had said the day before. She did everything I said she should keep doing "...and guess what DADDY, it still didn't matter. I got a yellow anyway" she said almost at the top of her voice.

Boy, if ever I felt like a let her down for letting her know that continuing to do what was right wouldn't get her into trouble, and that not going to school for a day wasnt the way to solve the problem.

Long story short, the one boy, whom she's been friends with since back to their days in preschool, just so happens to keep getting himself into trouble. Mostly for being a disruptive influence in class. On this, the last day of Cruella de Vil substituting, he happened to sit next to Jasmine, and unfortunately got both himself and my daughter in trouble for disrupting class. She says the teacher asked them to put away their work, which she did. Only for the boy to grab all her stuff again from underneath their tables where they'd been asked to place them, and he scattered them all over their little group's table.

It appears Cruella de Vil doesn't take no prisoners, and immediately yellowed both of them. I still don't know if she was given the chance to defend herself, coz she doesn't want to talk about it. At least not yet. She was mad at me for the greater part of the rest of the day because I insisted she goes to school and now she had a blemish on her otherwise perfect record of behavior.

Today, their regular school teacher returned, and its amazing the difference I saw in the kids. They were back to their usual jolly selves, giggling and all, while waiting in line to be signed out of school for the day. The last couple of days they'd pretty much line up in almost military parade order, but with slouched shoulders and dropped heads dying to get on out of there in a hurry.

She's since forgotten about the yellow and life's moved on.

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Cruella de Vil, the Substitute Teacher

2011-03-28T22:55:00.000-07:00

We picked up our 5-year old from school today and she promptly informed us that she would not be going to school tomorrow. She's always been the kind of kid that loves going to school. In the past, she's asked if she could skip school that day, but thats only ever been when she's woken up feeling under the weather. And that's been fine, especially when she's evidently not well. That wasn't the case this afternoon at all. She blatantly stated that she "WOULD NOT" be going to school tomorrow. She didnt even ask.

After asking her why, she told us, in her own words, that "the new teacher gives us intention"

Having a conversation with even my own kids to this day still requires asking them a lot of questioning their statements to decipher what it is they are really trying to say. And this was one of those times. We eventually figured out that what she was really trying to say was that "the new teacher puts them on tension."

I've seen this new teacher she was talking about. She's really just a substitute teacher, whose covering for their regular teacher till she gets back from whatever is keeping her away. She doesn't seem as openly friendly as their regular teacher. I could definitely be wrong, since in the last couple of days I've had minimal contact with her when I approach to sign out my kid at pick-up time.

Anyway, we adults, understand that she's just a substitute teacher and wont be around permanently. The kids dont know that or just don't understand it though, and Jasmine is really stressed about it.

She said "...the new teacher gives us a lot of yellows for no reason at all".

Yellow, is a color-code for lowest level of misbehavior in the class. Meaning you've been a mild nuisance of sorts to the class or teacher. Something like repetitively talking in class gets them a yellow. I think its blue that's a level higher. Red is huge. Like you hit another kid in school. There's other colors that they try to achieve. Good behavior colors, and she lives for these.

Each color code has consequences or rewards. Red, being the extreme means they call your parents up there and then to ask them to pick you up from school straight away, and till they can, you get banished from class to the front office to wait for them. Also, if you keep accumulating various misbehavior color codes too quick, they can equate to another more severe color code, like along the lines of two yellow cards in soccer earning you an automatic red card!

The kids understand this pretty well. We were informed that the first two weeks or so of joining elementary school were spent mostly teaching them about action and consequence, and less about actual instruction in their immersion language. Once they understood that, then consequence to action could be delivered in whatever language they are tutored in.

Turns out the substitute teacher has been dishing out a lot of yellows to many of the kids in the short time she's been with them. Miss Substitute Teacher is possibly very strict or they are getting yellows for stuff they shouldn't be getting yellows for. She said it seems everything anyone does gets them a yellow from the teacher.

Whatever it is, its got her stressed out about it and she's figured that the one sure way she can avoid getting yellows for doing things she's no longer sure will or wont get her yellow-carded/stickered is to simply not turn up at school, till hopefully this teacher goes away. Good logic, if you ask me. You cant have done a crime if you were not at the scene of a crime right. Especially if you dont know what will be classified as a crime or not.

Unfortunately for her, we explained, it doesnt work that way. And if she's not gotten a yellow yet, or in the past, which she says she hasn't, and we know that for a fact coz it would have been reported for matter-of-fact's sake just so we knew, then she just needs to keep doing what she's been doing, and she should be safe. Personally, I was mighty proud of her, knowing even though she knew yellow wasn't that bad, it still mattered a lot to her to keep a clean record on her behavior sheet.

Twice we caught ourselves starting along the path of telling her how we were given all kinds of corporal punishments in school back in our day. Ass-whuppings were my punishment of choice, if ever I was given one, coz some of the rest were just outright brutal. But then she was so lost in explaining the stressfulness of her situation that we couldn't get her attention to tell her our comparatively worse experience. It was a good thing tho, coz its two-different worlds, two-different generations, right. I mean, we got tired of our own parents telling us how we were so lucky that we occasionally got driven to school so we shouldn't complain about having to walk to school, considering that they walked for miles and miles and miles. And more miles to school. Without shoes. They always had to add that "without shoes" bit.

They'll be a time to share our own experience one day, but now maybe was not appropriate and for a 5 year old they'd probably miss the whole point. Or just think we're lying !!

She's since done her homework, and learned that Miss Substitute Teacher may not even be there tomorrow since she's a sub.

We cross our fingers and hope for her sake that tomorrow her regular class teacher is back.

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