kaleidoscope

The Errant Freckle

2011-11-07T05:56:00.001+05:30

I maybe small, I maybe insignificant
but I am definitely present.
You can drown my voice,
you can shut your ears.
Every word I utter,
is a sound vibration
travelling through the universe,
undying, seemingly ephemeral.
You cannot fathom
the difference I'm going to make,
the change I'm going to ring in.

I am the errant freckle
on the cheek of this Cosmos,
I'm going to break the smooth expanse
of your humdrum existence
and stand out by contrast.

After all I am there,
you can pretend I'm not,
it doesn't matter to me.
I maybe small, I maybe insignificant
but I am definitely present.

I maybe alone,
I may feel left out at times.
Yet this despair makes me darker,
makes me stronger,
makes me who I am.
I am the errant freckle
on the cheek of this Cosmos.
and I defy your dainty rules
just by existing !

My survival is a blot on your face.
I maybe small,
but I have big dreams.
You have limited yourself
by your vain imagination,
your struggle for perfection,
your fear of 'what others will say'
The chains are in your mind.

You live only but once,
is the right path so hard to find ?

Real Freedom

2011-10-20T01:12:00.000+05:30

To be really free means something.

It means doing ballet like a child in front of your parents,
losing yourself inside your mind so completely that you're not aware of your physical form,
walking through a crowd not like you're invisible but like everybody else is invisible to you.

Real freedom of spirit is like being naked in front of everybody,
yet self-consciousness comes only if you hit mental bankruptcy.
As long as you have the currency of the mind nothing can stop you from being free.

Real freedom means having the sky in your eyes so even when you look up the image in your mind merges with the image in the sky and raises your hopes higher day after day.

Real freedom means not having to pretend,
being so truely yourself that nothing can embarrass or ashame you anymore.

True freedom implies being the king of a golden dawn or a murky twilight, yet possess nothing.

True freedom means being able to flee at a moment's notice.
The reason you move to a new place should be to see new places, not because somebody or something made you go there.

Being free means never having to answer to anyone.

Being really free means no human power can bind you to one place,
that you are not addicted to the physical form of any particular being,
that your thoughts, feelings and ideas do not depend for multiplication on intercourse
but they are your own...
procreated by you and nurtured along the way by many others perhaps..
but you own them, you brought that force into life.

Being free means losing track of time, so much so that you can feel every second as it soaks you by.

Mental freedom is the power to do what you want to, when you want to
and to the pursuit of this I have dedicated my life.

I want no shackle to bind me, no fear to hold me back, I want to jump and fall and rise and stumble and get up over and over again till it becomes a way of life !!

I deserve every minute of uncertainty, it is what makes every minute count, it is what puts a layer of excitement over every second of life.

True freedom means being in touch with yourself, means knowing yourself so fully well that you can never put
yourself in a box, for if you knew yourself completely you would also see that you are forever changing in
tiny measures.

Being truly free means allowing your mind to reign supreme,
means listening to that stupid voice inside you which tells you that it's going to work, when logic and
skepticism are glaring at you with stern eyes.

Real freedom means knowing that nothing can be trusted, not even yourself because you are but a sower of dream seeds. Every year the crop changes and with different seasons you have different harvests.
Let the seeds grow free among the weeds and wild birds, they only affect your seeds if you let them.

You are a dream tree growing among a zillion weeds, you can shoot upto the sky and beyond, if you just stand up to your full height.
The tragedy is most of us choose to remain bent, rooted to the ground when all you have to do is throw up one arm and then the next and add more branches and this up-linking will create a bridge to the glorious future you almost thought wasn't possible.

Unleash your potential- let your mind flow.... when the river of the mind overflows its banks only then are old crops washed away and new ones grow.
Let go, let go, just let go !

Dark Days Are Upon Us

2011-04-25T21:36:00.001+05:30

DARK DAYS ARE UPON US

Dark days are upon us
the kind when night becomes real
and a glowing bulb is distantly comforting.

To live you work for someone else
which in turn kills you slowly
Its ironical how we dont know what we're doing
and why we're doing what we do.

There will be no sign on the wall
till the whole wall crumbles
into pink satin, cream and cheese, home-made bread
and games of tic-tac-toe- xoxoxo !!

The children shout, TV's running loud
and the coffee table books lie unopened.

Strange days are upon us
our lives made of fluff
staying strong means admitting you're weak
you stay rooted in reality to fulfil your fantasies.
Even 'The Graduate' had to fuck Mrs Robinson to find his true love.
Beneath the surface of every victory
lie pain and sweat, blood and tears.

This globe isnt a perfect sphere
the poles are flat, pierced by a tilted axis.
Nothing is what it seemed to be,
you keep fooling yourself
with your feel-good words and hopeless romanticism.

Words are just words, they are no replacement for what happened
and for what is to happen.
Im ignorant by choice, knowledge will only perplex me further.
To go on day after day you need to be a little bit stupid,
a little too comfortably resigned to your fate.

For if you knew what was going to happen,
maybe you'd walk down a different road
But all you want is that bottle of golden liquid everyday,
that slice of cheese pizza with oregano seasoning
I know what you crave
just one more puff from that cigarette,
just one more minute of that blissful slumber.
Maybe a kiss from your beloved and a stamp of approval from your father
would just about set things right.

The smiles, handshakes and hugs of all your friends
carry them in your fools jar,
they will help you get by.
This candy floss bunny hopping by your side - how can you not see it !!

Dark days are upon us,
your torch has run out of battery but
you dont need light to see the path you were already walking blindly upon.
Step by step you have made a trail of the humdrum,
you're now just another 'Im Loving it' Mc Drone !

Then you ask me, "What is the meaning of my life? What is my purpose, what am I here for ?
Where is my God who will make evrything alright ? When, where, how, why !"

Dark days are indeed upon us
I light a match and set the wax burning
you see a hint of sarcasm in my troubled smile.
Our shadows made spookily long by the candle light
I tread softly ahead
I have nothing more left to say.

Mental Suicide

2011-02-23T08:25:00.002+05:30

It has gone on far too longer than it should have.

The self loathing stems not from being completely useless,

but from being ashamed of the fact that I exist !!

Scripting my mental suicide,

the psychic vamp drains me to the last drop.

Makes me think harder than Ive ever thought before.

The nerves give way

teased by more than liquor and caffeine.

Embarrassment doesn't even begin to cover it,

How I could hurt someone so maliciously

can only be explained by an evil intent!

I kind of knew I had it in me,

just never let the Demon take over earlier,

drowning Him in number counts and faraway songs...

while she puked venom all over my grey matter.

The verdict is tragic - I am indeed a horrible person

to have hurt someone who loveD me so much.

But then if love means strangulation,

I guess I'd rather be 'not born' and 'never broken'

than be shown a glimpse of Flee-dom

only to have it snatched away.

Dysfunctional and deluded,

my Mad-hatter of a brain refuses to cope.

Its my mental suicide at last !

And I am sure of it because

even rehashing the pain has failed

to move me to tears.

I am now dry, untouched and unloved.

The Eccentric

2011-02-16T03:48:00.004+05:30

Breaking into pieces bit by bit,
Slow shattering
of the mind,
Every tear a prick.
Time flies away,
Dreams seem distant
Sanity no longer a certainty.
The hare wins the race
The slow and steady
succumbs to haste.
The short-lived glory,
An impatient act
of greatness.
Genius jumping into the abyss,
egged on by Desperation.
Bruised and bloodied elements
shaping into shapelessness.

Change is afoot,
blocking streams of thoughts,
Dazed waves silently return,
rejected by the shore.
Some missed strikes,
some lofty promises.
Hesitant expectations
lie unfulfilled still.
Hope crawls away.

Rain knocks on tin sheets
Flickering light,
almost dead
gasps for life in the storm.
collapsed Will lies in
doubt and denial.
The tank runs empty,
The red signal long ignored.
The beeping and the blinking,
go unnoticed yet again.

A lazy day
yawns in my face,
Nothing to indicate
what caused the damage.
A restraint, a plea
helpless strangulation of life.
Liberty watches silently
Her free birds now carrion,
carcasses that cannot fly.

Declared 'unstable'
by myopic scrutiny.
The 'eccentric' revealed
fumbles in the dark,
stringing words on a line
trying to make a living
out of babble and rhyme.

An uncertain Life

2011-01-05T01:42:00.004+05:30

The insanity, the madness.

The boring, the mundane.

The sky gazing, The day dreaming.

The unopened box of dreams.

The wishing, the praying.

The sadness, the regret.

The pity, the tears.

The guilt, the foolishness.

The screw ups,  the Don Juan-ishness.

The Rat race gimmicks the trivial thoughts,

The drifting along and forgetting everything else but the hope of Living.

The whoops of delight, the sighs, the screams.

Clouds licking the mountain tops,

the never ending road to freedom

The tomorrow that never comes.

The trying, the failing, the optimism that refuses to die.

The seemingly immortal obstinacy.

The highs, the lows,

the drinking, the binging,

overloading a small brain with thoughts one too many,

nursing the bruised ego with wisps of careful reasoning.

The confusion, the daily dilemma the unkept promises,

the faithless chant of "its gonna be okay"

The waiting, oh the endless waiting !

Eagles in My Head

2010-08-26T23:29:00.001+05:30

Eagles in my head,

talons jutting out of my skull.

A feathery mess,

a fight against the flapping

torture of wings.

All acts inspired

by this struggle.

One must soar high

to achieve greatness.

My head has claws

holding onto a past

of unborn eagles.

Bits of shells

are all that remain.

Wet Lashes

2010-08-15T22:50:00.005+05:30

Wet lashes, eyes on the horizon

phantom lady, her ghost murmurs

echoing on soundless streets.

Grief cloaked in black smoke,

banal bursting out the seams,

rain clouds stifling her sighs.

Torn open envelope, the final note

damp, in her lifeless fingers.

Shadow of faith sliding

past her uprooted fences

Bricks of strength crumbling.

Uncoordinated dance of her limbs

the final show, flames of moonlight

black licks swallow her heart.

I watch as her wet lashes,

her eyes one with the horizon

her ghost murmurs

all fade into ashes.

The Zombification

2008-12-21T02:10:00.007+05:30

The winding snake path you follow,
leads neither to heaven nor to hell
but to something beyond the tangible.
Yet its not nearly invisible,
a translucent aura you might perceive
of this land adrift with
tufts of dreams and billowing desires,
The blue sea hung and dried on a board
for you to watch and discern.
A land of enchantment and
base deeds; human love and inhuman greed.

How do you welcome a stranger,
when you yourself are one ?
Even though you landed just a second ago,
for the ones that follow, you're a guide, maybe a target.
Rules are few; some are ancient, some are new
but what the window shows isn't an image,
a mirage maybe, you're never sure.
You haven't seen anything like this before,
A hot mist rises from the sun,
the clouds are in your head
not on the sky below.
Everything seems upside down,
but your eyes are open
your feet are on the wet ground
that shivers like a pool as
soon as you push forward.
You're walking on a mirror,
there are mirrors everywhere;
mirrors on the mountains,
mirrors on the sea,
mirrors in your mind.
Reality is elusive, flitting like a glow-worm
from here to there.

What proof can you give you exist !
No one can see you,
no one can hear your call.
Maybe your soul you've bared,
it gets pierced by the merciless wind.
A home away from home is what you wanted,
a quirk of fate is what you got.
You're breathing but your heart tells you something ain't right,
then you look at the creatures around you,
their eager faces upturned and aglow.
You know they're just sleepwalking,
stuck with Zombies in a land of paraded intellect,
You refuse every food for thought;
you either have none or
too much to deal with at once.

The wind has turned you into a sceptre of yourself,
you stand up, you try to run, you fall, you curse
those around you flash encouraging smiles.
Your sprint is amazing, it took every ounce of
energy suspended within your hollowed bones.
Still you somehow manage to hop upto them
and drop at their feet with a loud thud.
What do you do when there is no one to pick you up !
Your illusions of long ago lie shattered in pieces,
your dreams seem to belong to a distant eternity.
Your actions are so disconnected,
no one recognizes you anymore.
Your face isn't you, just another mirror
there, now you're a Zombie too.

The Cult Of The Faithless

2008-11-23T04:09:00.004+05:30

Simply put, its you, its me
the Cult of the Faithless - we who live free.
maybe we're cynical
maybe we're nonsensical
maybe we're maniacal
maybe we're impractical
but simply put - we don't care !

I have faith in the Cult of the Faithless !!

We who know there's no one sitting above,
we who are bold enough to admit
that the world is so full of shit.

We who never stand up for anything,
because we know its not worth fighting for.
We who smirk at the religiously religious,
and laugh at them when they try to pray
with their empty hearts and hollow chants.

I have faith in the Cult of the Faithless !!

We never follow, only sit and comment.
We take the safest short-cut out
when surrounded with trouble.

We who live free and shamelessly
at times attempt to hide behind
curtains of excuses and complacency.

I have faith in the the cult of the Faithless
because I know we are always there
We are the gray within the black
and we are the astray followers of every pack.
We know we wont get too far,
but we carry within us a feeling of power

Simply put, its you, its me
the cult of the Faithless - those who live free,

The cult of the Faithless - the group that was never meant to be !

Its not about the escape

2008-11-23T03:15:00.004+05:30

I wish I could die,
but something tells me
I just want more out of life.

After all its not about the escape
Its about the embrace.

Saying goodbye is a moment's task,
but will I be able to answer
all those unending questions
tormenting me !

Where is the escape ?

How do I go and embrace
a horror I know I wont be able to face.

I cannot simply stand
with arms wide open.

I may end up getting hurt
and then see my lost world
vanishing before my eyes
in a cloud of dust.
I will be left with only the scars
of wilful malice & mistrust.

I wish I could die,
but then something tells me
I just want more out of life.

After all its not about the escape
Its about the embrace.

Is it !

Hug My Soul

2008-11-20T20:19:00.002+05:30

(One of the best things that ever came out of looking for my finance notes- found this poem I had scribbled in my class notebook)

My soul needs a hug,
its weeping, its bleeding.
I don't need you to ask questions,
Just creep upto me unnoticed
& let me feel your warm embrace.
Lie beside me for a while
& let my being be engulfed in the
depths of your solace.
Let my cold soul be warmed
by your sunny aura of love & compassion
but not merely that, also
of silent regard & nodding eyes.
Just transmit your faith,
your lively hopes, your dainty dreams
into my bleached soul,
into my parched unwhole.
Sense my urgency
& just lift me
in our soul-hugging union.
I'm searching for you
wildly and cravenly.
Take my grief away into your tranquil being
Come now, give my soul a big,long hug.

Confessions of A Rebel

2008-07-10T14:26:00.008+05:30

(This piece is dedicated to one of the coolest people I know - my unofficial mentor at SIBM Pune - Protik Basu)

I know I'm not capable of it
but a part of me wants to kill.
Wants to hurt so badly a human life
that it begs and pleads me to let it go.
I've never used a weapon before,
It glints with an enticing sheen
inviting me to take its metallic coldness
and push my wrath through, to let it drain
the blood out of another.
Would it be really a killing, really a murder ??
What of those who kill me everyday
with their facades of frost
and spirits with malice wrought.
Kill me all at once
or let me be the killer
Yes, yes I confess
I'm a fucking rebel !

They will kill me anyway
so why not today !
How long the waiting,
How long the stifled breathing ?
Do I really have to wait ,
Do I not make a choice even in
the choice that I do not make.

The rebel in me isn't gonna let you be,
I'm searching for you,
though my nerve is failing & my arms flailing.
Do not go by the innocence,
the time is ripe for your penance.
The rebel in me is out for the kill,
heart, nerve and sinew madly thudding
with the unbearable thump of revenge.
I know not exactly what I have to avenge.
All I know is that I just gotta go
before I take the final blow .

The Vagabond of A Dream-world

2008-07-10T11:50:00.005+05:30

Cloaked in velvety blackness,
her shadowy eyes glinting,
her aura of intended mystique
subdued by gossamer veils
slowly undone, spilling freely
her silhouette of overflowing power.

Behold the Vagabond of a dream-world,
lost in her own thoughtful trance !

The silken notes of her voice
billowing out through the softness
of her sensusous, sinewy lips
like worms oozing out of earthy dampness.

She leaves in her wake a purple haze,
the rustle of her shuffle
echoing in the dark maze.

The lilting melody of her tickling song,
bouncing off little rocks of lala land,
hinting at the writhing effort
of her drunkenly swaying tongue.

Behold the Vagabond of a dream-world !

She is a witch stirring the ether,
seeking her destiny beyond the confines
of worldly fire, air and water.
Brewing up a storm
in her bubbling cauldron;
Her madness culminating in an elixir
that makes happiness last forever !

Teary Fields of Death

2008-07-09T11:44:00.006+05:30

In the lonely fields I wander,
a dark child follows at my heels
I feel like a zombie
but filled with dread
I am become a "nobody"
the fields glistening with golden corn,
beckon to me waving anon,
stumbling and bumbling
I shatter the grassy path I tread
the iconoclast of my past spurring me on
where I'm headed I do not know at all
lost and wandering I step on the buds
I crush some hopes and kill some rays
of joy trying to penetrate my soul
my weary silhouette has distorted the sun
I run, I cry, I fall, I die .
I do not know where to go
fields of love, fields of sorrow,
the crushed corn weeps silent tears
the gloomy aura abets my fears
not a soul in sight
such a lonely land
trying and crying, struggling and weeping,
the wretchedness makes me weep even more
the green fields are lush and verdant
now I finally know why
all this while I'd been feeding them
with the tears of my life
Dazed on the lush green grass
I run, I cry, I fall, I die.

I Feel So Guilty

2008-05-29T16:58:00.009+05:30

When guilt overshadows pride,
and you've got nowhere to hide,
Come to me when all around is dark.
I'll be waiting for you
under the silver tresses of the moon
or under the blazing sky at noon.
I won't smother you I promise
but maybe just caress you with a kiss.

Can't forget the agony you went through,
I know how hard it must be for you.
But now its your time to shine.
Don't put yourself on the line,
for just a penniful of dreams.

Be the person you are
and just give it your best,
I'm sure you'll pass the test.

I forgave you long ago for not being there,
but it doesn't matter now becoz we're here.

I've learnt to take things in my stride
when painful guilt overshadows pride.

ps- This is a song I wrote, which is a poem too but personally I like the song version better which has got the line " I feel so guilty" as the chorus , inserted after every stanza or two.... I wish I could upload that too but I'm a terrible singer so no use till I find a suitable volunteer. ;)

Ode To The Mermaid On My Bed-spread

2008-04-04T06:06:00.016+05:30

Ode To The Mermaid On My Bed-spread

You greet me at noon
with your cold, mysterious smirk.
(For I wake not at dawn or early morn
but only when the clock yells "Twelve" anon.)
On the fabric of rich handiwork,
you sit quite smugly, over such
mossy Grey boulders,
lending life and mystique
to all that you touch.

I refuse to be intrigued by you
or your semblance of composed blue,
For you are just but half-a-fish
and though I too am somewhat related
by the unfortunate Zodiac of Pisces thus rated,
Yet I loathe your lusty cheer
for you are but exactly
in the middle of Nowhere,
and it cannot be much fun you see
to be dipped in the Sun, then dried on the Sea.

Yet you look so calm and peaceful,
Of all fun and passion bereft.
Your liquid hair, your languid pose
cut in my heart an envious cleft.
The salty sea-wind through
your fish-finned livery flows,
Does it ruffle your tiny fish-scales,
so daintily arranged in rows.

How can you be so lifeless !
Yet seem so enticingly awake
each time I steal a glance,
ever so unwillingly at you askance.
A mirror of enchantment you hold
to me at night, as I go flying
into the long-forgotten world
of Spirits and Mermaids and Fairies,
of dark Castles and bold Knights,
of magic lamps and Witches' flights.

I know you are not sad,
Yet your eyes a longing betray.
Have you indeed come from a land faraway !
Strangely, there seem to be no Mermen around,
eager to come and carry you away
into some shellacked abode, newly found.
You must have once, bid your home adieu,
But still deep down rue the rebel in you,
Now lost among strands of dull serenity,
Waltzing on the sea of life
with an inherently innocent chastity.
I mention you hereby in my rhyme
not merely as a good past-time.
But because I see a bit of you in me,
and in you seek my "Fishy" ecstasy !

A WRITER'S BLOCK(II)

2008-03-27T21:00:00.007+05:30

contd. from - A WRITER'S BLOCK

qualification........pooh.....just another technicality! gimme a break will you !

okay as you wish but then ....i do hope that you do know that you need to fill up those sheets of paper in order to be able to fill up your bottomless pit of a tummy you glutton !!

oh shitt !! I completely forgot all about the novel !! no time to waste.....gotta hurry....stop distracting me okay you stupid good-for-nothing voice in my head !

and i thought being sarcastic was my job ......ho hum.....

whatever .......I cant laze around anymore..thanks for reminding me......weird as it may sound but sometimes you do talk sense.

sometimes ! huh !!

" she stepped out of the car, he had already applied the brakes so it was standing motionless on the road anyways....."

no !! the fucking brakes !! they're just not right !! I cant let some goddamn brakes mess up my novel !! my comeback chance !!

ahem...let me remind you of one more thing.....you could momentarily imagine that you are fulfilling a higher purpose in life by penning down this novel and that the millions of eyes that are going to run across these lines will praise you forever if it touches their soul and they could even get hooked onto the most noble and pure habit of reading.....think of all the lives you could change.....

what are you - the testament or something !! noble.....higher purpose......where did you learn all this bullshit.......just lay off for a while okay......

"She stepped out of the car...he was thinking hard what to do.....maybe not apply the brakes......maybe he could just run her over and kill her right there on that deserted stretch of road with her insides smeared on the hard concrete and he might be free of it all yet......" naah too destructive !

well i think its going fine.....remember OQ( obscenity quotient) - this is not exactly obscene but well grossing out the readers works almost the same way and who knows maybe this way you'll garner some attention too.....and you know you do not run the risk of committing an egregious error since violence is today's reality and you are the messiah leading the way with your realistic fiction..leading onto a path of higher enlightenment and self-awareness as if lamenting the present deplorable dismal condition of mankind.........using your words as beacons of a new revolution........

Shut up !! go to a frigging church if you wanna preach !! get a life loser !!

ummm......i know these things are beyond you but you can at least put on a semblance of courtesy and for once acknowledge that i am a noble spirit guiding you and delivering you from sinful deeds.....anyways i'll just get down to your level- go ahead with your destructive thing....it works fine.....bring it on !

thank god the moralistic brigade is gone !! now you're talking....i love murders man......okay lets get on with this huh.....how about killing one or two cats too alongside.....

cats ?? huh......please spare the feline creatures , they're anyday more precious than the stupid female in your novel who has a brain the size of a nanotechnologically created molecule ..... she steps out of the car, lets her dumbass jerk of a chauffeur run her over and kill her cats too .and then..........

woah ....stop right there...first of all this is not a scientific novel....so how can she have that weird techno-brain you're talking about..also the guy is her lover..her boyfriend.....duh......and she doesnt own those cats......they're stray......and i thought you were paying attention !!

whatever !! its no use trying to talk sense to you..you are wired the wrong way weirdo.....carry on with the task at hand please...

"she stepped out of the car......"
for the last time i hope.....she's been stepping out of that car all day.....move it lady....

"she stepped out of the car and gave him a hard cold look as if she wanted to kill him.....a thud and a whack later his dead body was lying on the road.she had killed him by digging her finely pointed ultra-sharp stilettoed heel right through his heart...good riddance she thought....."

wait..wasn't she the one who was supposed to be killed....now you're changing the plot dude.......

who is writing the novel ?

ummm........you

so who gets to decide who gets killed after all ??

okay i get it dude !! carry on.....but i must tell you that anger beyond a certain level may prove to be quite harmful for you.....watch it dude....but i guess you're getting better...you are getting good at sarcasm even though i know you can't even spell it !

blah....i told you to shut up !

" so yeah she says to herself......good riddance- finally !!
thank you jimmy choo !"

hey that even rhymes......he,he....i am so cool !!

uh huh

"gloatingly she saunters across the road.....and gets run over by a speeding trailer.......those really long ones shown in speedster movies....ones that carry swanky cars within...so well......oh yeah.....she gets run over and the trailer is gleaming red but something inside is even redder.....the eyes of the driver.......ohh my god - its the dead boyfriend.........with the heel still stuck in his heart..the hull of the Choo shoe jutting out of his chest.....he has somehow managed to survive and is out to get her......sheer vengeance......... by now she is dead with her insides smeared on the hard concrete.....just as he had wanted it to be.......also he likes the hang of the trailer.....its like one monster spurring on the other ...he decides to paint all the tyres red by mowing down a few stray cats on the road too....what fun.......and dont even ask me how many tyres there actually are in that kind of a trailer....so you can well imagine how many lives he took that day......but he is our hero so he doesn't go to jail.....coz the female was a bitch and what's a few less animals here or there......aren't the zoos and the pounds just sick of them anyway.....good riddance i would say......"

ahem......what the hell are you doing ?? that is not the way you write a novel smart ass !!

ps- to be contd. further ( till the reader drops dead with disgust).

Hot Coffee and More...

2008-03-10T02:00:00.004+05:30

Tears in my eyes
Hot coffee in my cup
hiding beneath a swirling
sway of steamy vapours
storm rising from within....
Am I that obvious ?

I'd rather be a leader than a martyr
but I was never asked
I'd rather read than be read...
Am i that obvious ?

questions and emotions peeping from
within the dark frothy consistency
coffee stains multiplying on my jeans
the hot rim burning my lips
the sugary concoction searing my tongue....
Am i that obvious ?

With shaking hands i write
with overflowing heart i weep
my insides are aching
caffeine causes acidity....
But am I that obvious !!

-------------------------------------------------------
ps- why does it always happen that I set out to write prose and it comes out almost as poetry..........hmmm.......

A WRITER'S BLOCK

2008-03-01T02:46:00.009+05:30

"She got out of the car as soon as he applied the brakes ...."
- naah, too simple !!
"she stepped out of the car as soon as his foot reached the top of the brake pedal..."
- naah, too complicated !!

Damn it !! nothing works !!
C'mon you bozo just stop the car and let her get out !! so much for the thrills...........and what jerk of a man decided to put stupid brakes inside a car .........couldn't we just make it stop whenever we wanted to !!

errr i think thats exactly what the brakes are there for- to stop the car whenever we want to .ahem.

whatever ...., i'm so hungry right now......just let me get something to eat and then i'll get on with the story...

okay but this simply indicates that you are an utterly lazy, totally worthless, selfish, self-conceited,callous, arrogant bastard who doesn't give a damn whether the novel takes off or not since you are here just to get on other people's nerves and upon that you have the audacity to refrain from inserting any such lines in your work that could possibly act as remote precursors of even the tiniest bit of societal upliftment .......

oh my god !! i could use all this shit for my thriller....... or maybe i should save it for my autobiography or some glorious treatise on philosophy ....... hmmm.........i should take snack breaks more often !
all hail fried food !!
and hey i could also put in that hot chick i saw the other day, to hike up the Obscenity Quotient (OQ) huh....

what hot chick !! in your dreams maybe !! haa......

well don't you remember that fire-special episode of the "miracles-do-happen" programme on the nature channel where a baby chicken gets burnt alive.........and it turns from yellow to orange to black faster than you can say "chicken" !!

ohh...that.......that does not even qualify as obscene you loser !! what are you thinking.......its simple duh - no high OQ , no high sales !! got it !! c'mon now ....cant you think of something really disgusting ??

like that thing i did with my chocolate chip ice-cream ?

what ?

i didnt touch it !

huh !! why not ??

because i didn't have any money to buy it .

are you even qualified to write ?? huh.......

to be continued.....

(ps- for those who still havent got to know who is talking to whom here- its the writer talking to himself.)

6-LINE STORIES-more timepass by a writer !!

2008-02-27T21:40:00.001+05:30

THE LAZY BITCH

She felt extremely lazy.
total lethargy had engulfed her system.
she decided she needed a break from it all.
she got up and started walking towards the door.
she lifted her right leg and within seconds made a pool of stinking urine in the hall.
"sigh", she thought , "the business of a bitch aint easy, my lethargy doesnt even let me get to the park !! "

ps- this story is purely fictitious and any resemblance it bears to a "bitch" ( i'm talking of a "she-dog" here ) dead or alive is purely coincidental !! hee,hee.

Meal at Mc-Donalds

Two French fries - large.
One coke- large.
Four burgers - large.
Veg pizza- large.
Soft serve chocolate sundae- large.
The hole this order burnt in my pocket - LARGE !!

DYING TO RUN AND RUNNING TO DIE

"she ran like hell."

"she ran as fast as she could."

"she ran till she could feel her legs no more."

"she ran till she jumped off the cliff and went into a steep free-fall !!"

"she felt weightless,she blessed her feet for carrying her this far."

she woke up with a start and suddenly recalled that she had indeed lost her feet in the accident and she could run no more.

A SONNET- 14 LINES OTS

2008-02-26T23:32:00.001+05:30

On Man's Indifference

I bow my head at thy bravery
and how so callous can thou be !
I am speechless at thy great audacity,
at thy supreme ability to completely ignore Nature !
How praiseworthy thy disdain ! How glorious thy iron-will
of never paying attention to Mother's and Father's bounties
'Tis commendable how thou art wrecking Their gifts with gay abandon
'Tis remarkable how you never condescend to ask pardon !

When you realise your follies
only then shall you kneel
when thine eyes are purged of their lusty curtain
only then shall you really feel
His benevolence and Her protection
So I salute thee and thy indifference - thy damnation !

ps- another OTS attempt- this time they told me to write a sonnet ! so boring....but i thought i've never written a sonnet before so whats the harm in trying ! since i went to such lengths to find my pieces (the OTS judges seldom return it- they label it as their own property.) so i'm posting what i wrote that summer day almost about a year ago. I can see it has some issues - but its posted here more for my sake than anybody else's .And if you are finding this weird - its meant to be sarcastic okay- the piece not my post script. he,he.

THE GREEN VALLEY- OTS Poem

2008-02-26T20:27:00.001+05:30

Sweet birds twittering on the wizened trees,
soft foliage swaying, rustled by the fragrant breeze.
Hills like soldiers, lined up neatly at the horizon.
Beauty's enchanting eyes intoxicating me like sweet poison.

The sunny sky adorned with cottony flecks,
this vale the throng of flamboyant flowers bedecks.
Here, Nature's children and their playful mirth is abundant,
right here in this fascinating valley-lush and verdant.

But wait, Oh what do i hear ?
surely not the birds' lilting melody it is
yet it fills me with unknown cheer and immense bliss
and i think the singer is now quite near........
She seems to be an opera singer at the Almighty's Auditorium.

Oh Fairy ! Oh Queen of Renditions !

Thy gossamer silken voice is tearing me apart,
crushing my senses and tugging at my heart.
The vale is resonating with your coy exhibitions,
yonder, the stately soldiers are dancing to your tunes
and the multi-hued blossoms are stirring like moving platoons.

This mysterious valley has unfathomable secrets to reveal,
but oh, Mellifluous Maiden, when will you thy visage unveil ?
Endlessly I'll wait, untiringly I'll wait,
I'll wait by dawn and wait by dusk,
I'll wait under the moon's silver too.

Perhaps, my heart shall ache till the end of time
and my breath for being stilled shall pine
forever in this green valley of perplexing plausibles.

I shall wait to hear from you
till Father's hand leads me to the Pearly Gates.
The silvery ribbons of the brook and this scintillating vale
shall always remind me of thee
and never let me forget thy merry melody.

(ps- a nature poem written for an on-the-spot (OTS) competition..i wish i could have had a less cliched topic but well whatever......all comments and suggestions are welcome . plz feel free to rate this poem out of 10. I'm glad i'm finally getting to post this since it wasn't with me, lying with the judges only.........i had to make like a zillion rounds to get my hands on my own handiwork ! he,he........but finally i did manage to get it !!)

The Abyss of Conflicts

2008-02-09T00:36:00.002+05:30

Myriad colours melting to blackness
oozing down the abyss of conflicts
a solitary tear eggs on the meek
dropping dolefully into the abyss

Wholesome burden yet misery galore
what you see is what you don't get
strange rules and obscure strangers
hold the reins to your future

Dare you to defy them
else just dance to their tunes
to get plagued by the golden curse

Dare you to smite them
else just tread along peacefully
to get eternally bound by Mammon

Dare you to proclaim your path
else just wallow in the muck
curb your instincts and carry on
blindly yet blissfully

Myriad colours melting to blackness
filling up the abyss of conflicts
losing identity in the flurry of normalcy

Dare you to be different
dare you to make strong footholds
to clamber up out of
the sepulchral abyss

Dare you to be the sparkling purple
richly tinged and royally blessed

Dare you to be the screaming red
Rage personified and Passion perplexed

Dare you to be the blinding yellow
Light animated and Will unfettered

Dare you to be the soothing green
Calm harboured and Fecundity compressed

Dare you to be the bubbling blue
Wisdom ensconced and Joy enmeshed

Dare you to be the sunny change
Dare you to see the rainbow
in this dark abyss of conflicts.

I dare you !!

"mush" -room (pun intended)

2008-02-09T00:21:00.000+05:30

mush-room

The sheen on two big white orbs was all that was visible in the dimly lit room.
She was on my lap ,caressing my hair and doing things to me that made me feel very strangely excited !
Before I could stop her, it was over and tears started flowing down my cheeks as I heard her say "welcome to the Mush-Room sweetheart" !!