tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-86220475289213396362026-10-08T05:53:30.802-07:00give love&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comBlogger232125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-66837046931875437602023-04-29T05:35:00.003-07:002023-04-29T05:35:00.136-07:00

Pulling up late again. ‘I could have left early, but I didn’t,’ I’d think to myself the moment before coming up with an excuse. Instead, I left five minutes behind and told myself I would make up the time. But with cinders down on the roads that still had snow banks, there was no making up time. I would automatically say something about being held up at the office or the roads being bad. The

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-6341663790814418462023-04-22T05:30:00.001-07:002023-04-22T05:30:00.204-07:00

In the moment, work can feel so dramatic, so real: the threats, the accomplishments, and everything around it. But looking back at what I was doing two years ago, I just say, “oh, yeah.” Maybe it’s watching a coworker steal little by little, but you or I couldn’t say anything because it would look like you were just out to get that coworker? In the moment, it was infuriating. I was so pissed and

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-86731653265332819572023-04-15T05:30:00.005-07:002023-04-15T05:30:00.179-07:00

I recently had a client who I wrote for Monday through Friday. The guy in charge and who hired me had his direction and the family member he had me answer to had his own direction. The multiple directions was supposed to be addressed, but it never did. Also, this family member thought it appropriate to go in and make changes without saying anything. I told him that was a boundary that cannot be

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-42107274458776750172023-04-08T05:30:00.001-07:002023-04-08T05:30:00.182-07:00

The spring grass, fuzzy in it’s newness, sits under the water. Free to grow in the sun and spring time rain, until the rains come and the river submerged it. I feel this way often. Things are going great, I’m feeling the warm spring rays, then suddenly I am under water, things at work explode, or things at home collapse, and I’m underwater. I’m not dead, I’m just not in a place I feel I can

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-7637089357969937482023-04-01T05:30:00.003-07:002023-04-01T05:30:00.179-07:00

I remember the day, June 11, 2001, when Timothy McVeigh was executed for blowing up the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City. The cable news camera was brought on his mother and they asked her what she thought. She said that what her son did was wrong but she loves him anyways. I will always remember the tenderness of each word towards her son. What is it about a child that makes

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-20276395600372191392023-03-25T05:30:00.001-07:002023-03-25T05:30:00.186-07:00

I remember my very first Salsa class clearly: thirty of us in a dance studio, mirrors and a ballet barre as it’s only obstruction. The instructor explained the foundational steps as, “quick, quick, slow.” I could repeat that, “quick, quick, slow,” with enthusiasm. I would repeat it thousands of time, alone, and I had it down. The problem was when the music came on, I didn’t know were the 1 and 2

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-13655836522507720142023-03-18T05:30:00.002-07:002023-03-18T05:30:00.186-07:00

Earlier this week, I was writing in my “writing practice” notebook. The practice is something I pulled from Natalie Goldberg’s fantastic book, Writing Down The Bones. She suggests timed writing, by hand, and trying to fill a notebook a month. The key is to let the mind flow out through the pen and onto the page. I hope to fill half a notebook a month without my writing hand feeling like it will

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-1942882438491576722023-03-11T05:30:00.001-08:002023-03-11T05:30:00.215-08:00

The first thing you saw walking into my great grandmother’s cabin, or “Grandmarie’s Cabin,” was this dented aluminum basin where we washed our hands. She was the matriarch of the family and the first cabin the other cabins were based on. All water was pulled from the Great Sacandaga Lake in Adirondack Mountains of Upstate New York. In 1999, after my great grandmother passed away and we had the

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-89145742052385053482023-03-04T05:30:00.004-08:002023-03-04T05:30:00.173-08:00

My first real job, between college experiences, was at an electrical transformer factory in New Jersey. Grabbing my food from the cafeteria line and not sure where to eat, I sat down with a bunch of old engineers and guys who put these big boxes together. I was 19 and sat at the old white guy table. I’d talk to them and pass the lunch days with them my first few months. Then one day, I think

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-19774817783453059222023-02-25T05:30:00.001-08:002023-02-25T05:30:00.204-08:00

It’s coming up on three years since I walked the alpine paths of Bryce Canyon National Park. I was on a trip with my cousin to see Zion, Bryce, and Arches in a week. This particular day, March 11, 2020, he stayed back to finish some homework and to rest and I spent my day walking the edges along the parks high points. Occasionally passing a person and waving, mostly it was just me thinking,

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-72531706314891959802023-02-18T05:30:00.001-08:002023-02-18T05:30:00.178-08:00

I remember sitting in my college apartment with my friend Meron from Eritrea, Matt was tutoring us. I was still trying to remember what a sentence was made of, Matt reminded me, “a noun and a verb or subject and action.” This was my second time attempt at college. The first time, I ended up passing remedial English (which everyone passed) but dropping out of Composition I twice because I had no

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-10668392542301257492023-02-11T05:30:00.001-08:002023-02-11T05:30:00.203-08:00

I hit it off with him at the coffee shop and jumped on his campaign that day. I even gave some money to his efforts to win a local office.  But I started to sense something wasn’t right, his campaign manager didn’t seem to want to work around him and always wanted to meet away from him. Finally, with her husband there, she told me how emotionally manipulative and abusive he was as a

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-39392972686867558332023-02-04T05:30:00.001-08:002023-02-04T05:30:00.183-08:00

It was a cold night in Lakeland, Florida, when I walked around Lake Morton with some friends of mine. It was a religious school, so like all religious schools, we regulated each other with the shame that goes with so many rules and expectations. This one particular night, as we walked, my friend Sean, who was wearing a jacket, suddenly wasn’t. When I asked what happened, he quietly slipped away

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-57602078842464278682023-01-28T05:30:00.001-08:002023-01-28T05:30:00.242-08:00

Walking through the curated desert, often park rangers will leave a dead cactus or ocotillo to rot where it is. In the death of the ocotillo, a whole ecosystem rises up around it. If I were to lift any part of it, I may find different insects underneath or maybe some kinds of worms. There’s a certain poetry to life springing up where decay is underway.  I wish I was this resilient. When

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-3513417891849818352023-01-21T04:30:00.000-08:002023-01-21T05:07:47.172-08:00

 I remember how excited I would get as a kid for the county fair. My uncles around my age would tell me about what they hoped would be there this year and things they won in the past. I was ready. My dad didn’t make much money when I was this age. When the fair came, I might get a ticket for a ride or two, maybe money for a snack, but never any money to play a game.  I liked the

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-27624404027750839242023-01-14T05:30:00.002-08:002023-01-14T05:30:00.381-08:00

My car was spinning and I had no control. When I worked in Endicott that winter day, I was racing to the office. My former manager, Brian, was going to give me a ride to Albany, NY, for our monthly sales meeting. Taking the exit ramp at 50 mph so I wouldn’t be late, I hit black ice. Black ice is that ice that’s there but you can’t see it or it looks like a drying puddle from a previous storm.

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-38404711866721128482023-01-07T05:30:00.004-08:002023-01-07T05:30:00.181-08:00

When standing in front of a cactus, carved out by time, my perspective is challenged: Is it an old battered cactus or is it a resilient, persistent cactus? Each perspective emanates from the stories I tell myself.  Walking out of the pho shop, bellies full from the beef bone broth and noodles, we walked back to her car to say goodbye. Looking into her big eyes by the car, I wanted to kiss

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-76210248156669756572022-12-31T05:30:00.006-08:002022-12-31T05:30:00.181-08:00

The rain fell this past week, making mud of everything not paved over and pooling water in every uneven surface. My year and a half nephew took to those puddles with his blue rain boots. Every puddle was stomped with a mix of excitement and curiosity if he could stomp it harder. His smile was infectious. Before the last rains, his older brother took some fence post holes and made them deeper. My

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-63873356783887656092022-12-24T05:30:00.001-08:002022-12-24T05:30:00.189-08:00

Under the Superstition Mountain, etched with memories from before humans existed, sat the Palo Verde tree. Palo verde, or green stick in English, is what the Spanish called this desert tree. Squatty, the tree sits low with green bark, but it sits exactly as it is supposed to sit. This palo verde is beautiful. It is beautiful because it is exactly what it is. Only when I apply the models of

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-33880786117207702262022-12-17T05:30:00.001-08:002022-12-17T05:30:00.181-08:00

Like the rest of the world, this week I spent some time playing with ChatGPT. (In case you haven’t heard, it is an advanced AI chat bot from Open AI). It was impressive how ChatGPT could write an essay in seconds. But as I typed different commands and read the different responses, I couldn’t see anything real about it. The model is based on using the highest probable next word based on the

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-5887799625495793532022-12-10T05:30:00.001-08:002022-12-10T05:30:00.183-08:00

On the South Rim, a few years back, I noticed a little trail that wound down to an almost independent, suspended rock ledge. The problem, there was some distance between the rocks and the path, distance as in space between them and also a long way down. When I walk the rim the canyon or climb to the top of a mountain, I am usually a bit cautious of where I climb, avoiding loose rocks or spaces

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-72152537029131252542022-12-03T05:30:00.001-08:002022-12-03T05:30:00.190-08:00

In the desert, the brown is endless, save for the green by the rivers. The green is the thickest by the river and fades like an echo the further you get from the water. But by the river, it is as if the world is green. So it is with privilege, power, and all these other places where insecurities live. The further you get from the country club, or a group of yes men, or the endless compliments of

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-13955159496714534492022-11-26T05:30:00.003-08:002022-11-26T05:30:00.195-08:00

I remember my first desert sunset. Walking all day through the San Tan Mountains, the sun started dissolving into the purple, pink, and turquoise of the sky. The desert sky is unlike anyplace else I have ever lived. My pulse started quickening and I felt alive as the temperature dropped, apparently dropping enough to have a big snake in the road. I quietly walked out and around on the other side,

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-6904669872015989642022-11-19T05:30:00.006-08:002022-11-19T05:30:00.172-08:00

When I arrived at the Grand Canyon for the first time, I absolutely hated it. I couldn’t see the edge and was almost smacked in the face with a selfie stick. There were an endless amount of humans taking selfies at the edge, unaware of the world outside their phone and all it connected to. I felt the glory of the Grand Canyon lay dead at the feet of Instagram. I jumped back in the car and

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8622047528921339636.post-24115222902734480792022-11-12T05:30:00.001-08:002022-11-12T05:30:00.182-08:00

Recently I’ve had trouble with my Apple personal assistant, Siri. I doesn’t matter how often I say, “Hey Siri,” my voice assistant doesn’t work. Also, very random texts are read to me through my AirPods, and important ones seem left unread. I’m learning to not depend on them like I was easily doing. I get Siri, like Alexa and Google, will experience these ebbs and flows as the Artificial

&Haikuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07792258293883067757noreply@blogger.com