MANTRA

Useless Mind Ramble

2011-06-06T10:29:00.000-07:00

I thought that it would be fun..to do something that I used to do..long ago. I think one of my professors in College started it, or shoot..it may have been in high-school. Anyhoo, the object of this adventurous mind game or Mind Fuck..for me, (once it's read after it's done) IS to write down every thought in a min or two.
Here goes:

12:18 (Start)

I wish I could play the piano..wait I used to play when I was younger..it was boring.. Oew..their playing Nina Simone on Pandora!! I love her.. (It's a pity) I think that's the name of it. I used to wish she was my mother when I was younger. Wow.. I love her.. Dang.. the kitchen is a mess. i wish she would call me. I miss her so much. We used to talk all the time.. I'm horny. The keyboard needs dusting..is that and ant? Mbqanga..what's that? it's really hot out..I hope I finish this sculpture. ok..this is boring now. "How do I explain..Nina singing in the background"..hungry. Maybe i'm hungry instead of horny..Nope! I'm both. white tile would be pretty in the kitchen..dirty in a week. though. pity..pity. He'a a dick..don't answer

12:21 (stop)

The Pill Box Hat

2011-06-06T09:26:00.000-07:00

"Good night Sweetheart, well, it's time to go, dah dah dah dah da.. Good night Sweetheart, well it's time to go.." hummed from her throat.
She wore a black pinstriped, pencil length skirt, with tailored white shirt deeply tucked. She loosely toddled with wide hips. Her weight shifting uneasy on her crooked heel; bent from an unfortunate mishap with a sidewalk crack.
A veiled, black Pill Box Hat, covered her dark hair; with a few tasselled strands, flustering about. She oozed step by step. Stealthily, she glided. Her head held high and a yellow clutch buried underneath her armpit. Bright Berried lipstick tainted her lips and way too much rouge hid her cheeks.
Up the concrete steps, she climbed. Holding black banister, and swinging opposite arm shyly behind her.
The glowing orange bell she pressed.
A loosely dressed young woman answered the door. She wore an over-sized, dingy T-shirt that hung from her shoulders. It barely covered her bare bottom. Her hair was unkempt and a violet bruise on her chest, peeked from underneath.
"Are you her?" she hinted. While slightly opening the door.
"Why, who else would I be, darling?" She mockingly whispered... Her voice was rasp, husky and slow. The girl widened the door and she entered..
"He's in the bedroom at the top of the stairs." The girl pointed.
"Alright" she briefed.
As the woman turned to leave.. The girl interrupted, "Um. Mam, don't you need something else? I mean do you have help coming?"
"Ha!.. No honey, we need this to be discreet. Don't cha worry none, love.. I got it under control." She smirked.
She entered the room and discovered a gray haired, critically aged man, sprawled across the bed on his back. His head lay twisted, his chin was upright, and a single stream of blood hung from the corner of his mouth.
"Tis Tis" She shook her head. "I don't feel sorry for you, you sick old bastard." She went behind him, cigar in lip.." Aye honey.. you gotta light?" she called out.
" Uhh..Yes Mam." She peeped. Up the stairs and in the room she darted. She held the light under the woman's cigar... "Thanks babe." "Hunh hunh." The girl quickly sang.
"Darling, get that door for me.." said the woman, (nodding toward the bathroom)
"Yes. Mam."...
She grabbed the man by the top of his arms, and tugged him from the bed to the floor. When his body hit the floor a pop of blood gushed from underneath him..
"Damn honey, how long has he been dead?"
"Just a couple of hours." she responded.
"Fuck, this bastard probably didn't have long to live anyway." She pulled him into the bathroom and rolled him in the tub.. the clicks of her heels tickled the girl..
Umph. Umph. Umph... She shook her head. "What a mess!" as she glared at the carcass. "Oh well." She quickly returned to the bedroom, grabbed her purse, pulled another cigar and eyed the girl.
She leaned on a dresser and stared at the girl. She pitied her.
"Here Hun, light this again". The girl quickly came.
"Look here girly.. (While speaking with the cigar between her lips)..Why don't you go tidy up and put some clothes on, you ain't got to be naked all the time. Not no mo'." (She slightly smiled and nodded at her)..."Give me some time and I'll let cha know when I'm done." She glanced at her, with piercing eye.
(Softly) "Oh..okay." the girl murmured, and hesitantly left the room.
The woman shook her head.. .(Poor child..ain't got a clue) she laughed.."Damn hoes, getting younger and younger, dirty bastards (referring to the men).
She closed and locked the door. Kicked off her shoes and sat on the edge of the bed.
A deep sigh fell from her chest..Oh..well, let me get this over with. She popped open her purse and retrieved a small bottle filled with a clear liquid. She went to the tub and sprinkled it all over the man. As each drop hit the body..dust rose and small purple burns began to appear.. She muttered some gibberish and a couple of hand movements into the air..and then sprinkled more. The bathroom soon became filled of nebulous fumes.
She coughed and fanned..smoked and gawked.   Her eyes bulging from the sight of him. She gagged on the stench.. "Damn." she grumbled, while fanning the air.
Peering down at him..What kinda hell-hole you come from? You bout the wickedest piece of shit I din come along on..in a long time.
His body withered, stretched and distorted. It hissed, and flailed. His gray hair now..scarlet..and ablaze..Wild loose hair sizzled and popped through the air. At one point, a fiery hair landed on her shirt, she quickly swiped it off..and anxiously brushed all hints of imaginary residue from her clothes.
With disbelief the Woman, watched.
The body convulsed feverishly. The arms jolted and jerked. Raggedy hands smacking the sides of the tub. His smoldering legs..army green with melting pea-green skin; flopped up and down.   His toes..bluish gray and turned under..had drooped like rotten grapes.
A blue strange hue outlined him.   His teeth clicked and rot from the root..His thick tongue gushed raspberry bubbles. He groaned and grumbled. Moaned and even seemed to smile.
"Aye! Fada!? What's dis?" In thick Geechee tongue she questioned and rambled about. "Oh. Mi. What kind of sin is deez? Who's dis Man, Fada? She shouted. "Who's dis Man?"
"He's wicked for true. I NEVA seen a evil like dis!"   Fast. She placed the bottle on the edge of the bathroom sink, and her hat as well. She wiped the sweat from her forehead, then quickly reached back to tighten and restrain her hair.
Swiftly, she grabbed the bottle and dosed the man again. An even louder hiss screamed from the man.
She spoke in unknown tongue..and conjured all she had. Her eyes closed and rolled. Tears trickled from the creases.
She then looked up and spoke into the air. "Fada..Fada..dis here Angel ain't right. He ain't neva been right. You made a mistake by lettn dis one down here. Ya gotta take he and all his shit away from here. Take he away NOW, Fada."
Instantly, the room grew dark and full of smoke. With both arms she swiftly collected it, she gathered, and firmly constructed (it) into shape with her hands.
She patted and molded. She slapped and sculpted. Finally, she was finished.
"Whew" she exhaled.
She opened her eyes, and all was well. The air was clear, the tub was empty, and the smell was fresh.
Carefully, holding (it) in the palm of her hand. She grabbed (it) with two fingers and rolled it back and forth. Stretching it out long and making it tight and taut. She then sealed the ends with spit from her lips.
She grabbed her hat, flipped it over, and placed (it) inside a hidden pocket underneath silver lining.
To the mirror, she retreated. She observed herself while she washed her hands and face. Fixed her hair. Straightened her clothes and replaced the Pill Box Hat on her head. She tilted, smiled and blew herself a goodbye kiss.
She exited the bathroom, climbed back into her heels, retrieved her purse, and re-applied her lipstick.
She placed her purse back under her armpit..opened the bedroom door, and called for the girl.
"I'm finished..girl!". She chimed.
Excitedly, the girl appeared...with high-pitched voice.."Really?!" She brushed passed the woman and inspected the bedroom and bathroom. "Wow! There's nothing left! What?..how'd you do it?" she stuttered in amazement.
The lady in The Pill Box Hat..looked at the girl, pulled a cigar from her hat and said...
"Don't you worry your pretty little head about that girl." (Smiled) and placed the cigar between her lips..."Hey, let me get that light again?"

Juniper's Toss Up

2011-06-06T09:21:00.000-07:00

A peek of the red lace fluffed from my blouse. London plaid skirt clung to my waist... then pleated down my upper thigh. Black knee-length combat boots..tightly laced.   My hair pulled back in rippled ponytail and bright red lipstick. I carried my favorite Burberry Journal just to top the look off. It was my ode to Great Britain.

Not my usual attire for the library, but I knew he'd be there. His monthly lecture on "The New Developments In Medicine." was just wrapping up.. The stiffs, shuffling out the room. Stale musky air on their backs.   Tan and Beige wool coats..gray and blue polyester slacks, and wide flat leather shoes.

When they leave,   I shout "So, is this your way of getting more money?...Clever" I snare; with a half raised smile.

"Of course not." he remarks (slyly) "You know me better than that."

I laugh..."Exactly."

"So, how have you been?"

"Just fine sir... Simply Dandy." while spinning and giving him a whirl of my skirt.

"I see that"...he smiles.

Gathering his things, he moves closer. "So.. (lingering) What can I do you for?"

"Hmm." I smile. "I just came by to see you. Can't I do that?

"Sure, but that's not something that you ever do."

(Giving him a naughty look, and folding my arms) "Oh..that's not nice. I'm always up to see you."

"Right." He adamantly sparks and walks away toward the rest of his stuff.

Acknowledging his tone, I ask.."Are you mad at me?

"I wouldn't say that I was mad. I'm just not into this game you keep playing."

"What game?" I frown.

"The game where your all over me for a day or two..then I can't get a hold of you for months. Then you text me..or pop up..like everything is fine."

He shuffles his papers and books.

"It's too much of a roller coaster. I told you I liked you, June. But, if you keep doing this.   I don't want to see you."

"Aww, baby"..I pout. I'm sorry. I guess I thought you were just talking..I didn't think you were (THAT) serious.

"WHAT!" his voice raises. "What do you mean..that Serious?! June..this is not a joke. We've been messing around for almost 2 years now. Are you kidding?"

I nervously, chuckle. "Nope...I'm not kidding. I know we like each others company, but I didn't want to assume it was more than that. Sorry, that's just what I thought."

"Dammit" he whispers. Hovering over me and bending to my face. "I can't keep doing this."

Eye to eye, now. "I've helped you all I can, Juniper.. I can't do it anymore. Bye." and He heads for the door.

<em>He's serious</em>. I huff and exhale. "Wait" I mumble uneasily. <em>Oh no, he is serio</em>us. "Wait!" I screamed; following behind him. He turned and gave me the meanest look.

Back in my face..."Juniper! We are in a library!" he glances around.."This is my job and reputation, don't do this, here." His lips were wrinkled and twisted..His voice was stern and bitter.

He was indeed MAD.

I touch his hand. Bow my head and say "I'm sorry. I'm very sorry" in a soft innocent voice.

He looks at me, darts his eyes toward the door.. yanks his hand away and turns.

Once he reaches the door, he motions for me to follow.

On his heels, I skip.

Around the back of the building and into the parking lot, we go.

He pops the trunk..throws his things in.and slams the hood. I stand silently the whole time..

He opens the back car door.."Get in!" I look with wide-eyes.

"Kids sit in the backseat." he said.

I brush pass him..and climb in.   He climbs in too.

On top of me..he laughs. We both laugh.

"You sure you still want to be a doctor?" I ask. Cause I think you'll make an Awesome Actor! You really had me believing you." (l laugh) Oh, my god.. I even got chills."

We both crack up..

"Are you wearing panties?"

I smile. "What do you think?"

2011-06-06T09:02:00.000-07:00

Wow!!! I need to do a better job at updating, this blog. For those of you who don't know..You can find me on a regular basis at MANTRA..which is www.mantralotus.com

The Bell Tolls

2011-04-05T20:50:00.000-07:00

At the nape of your neck.. my pale fingernails linger in thin curls
softly pressing you into my cheek..
your ear to mine..
around my shoulders you rest..
tender grazing on satin sheets..we wrap each other..
we hold and console
carefully concealing one another..
tightly safeguarding...
At times I am underneath you.. hiding and retreating, guarded, kept warm and protected
At times I become your wings..stretching myself wide on top of you..allowing you to float..to relax..to drift
we take turns lifting each other
we take turns breathing for the other
tender kisses blend with sour tears
pained and silent
...........we make love
while the walls are crashing to the ground
while bombs are blasting and shots are firing
amidst screams..
...........we make love
while fires are burning and corpse lie uncovered in the streets
...........we make love
with shell casings at the foot of the bed and war ravaged photographs on the pillow
...........we make love
with a black-hooded victim huddling in the corner; dawning torn feet and lacerated hands
with orphan children crying underneath the bed
while the floor boards are rattling and the earth is shaking
while the Regime is at the door and the sirens are wailing...
...........we make love
with hundreds of gas-masked covered faces..peering through the windows
...........we make love..
desperately revolting against the hour
fighting minutes by seconds to reclaim lost innocence
the ticks tock louder..and then... the bell tolls...
(Times up)..with angst we face each other
I leap from the bed onto bloody executionary stones..
grab the pistol, posters, banners, and bullhorn..
he grabs the vest, machetes, phones..
....a blown kiss..and out separate windows we fly

Blue Butterflies

2011-04-05T20:46:00.000-07:00

Blue Butterflies | MANTRA

Throughout the ages..there have been Women.

Women who built and bore nations..
Women who fed and constructed.
Women that dug in the earth...
Basket Weaving Women
Powerful Juju having women...Truth Teaching Women...Geechi Speaking women
Herb Healing Women
Seed Planting Women
Heart Healers and Heart Breaking Women..

There were these Women..
These Thick in the Calf Women..that trotted long roads..
Ancient Gray haired Women that held stories close
Swollen knuckled Women that plucked the husk from corn.
Ruby-Black Desert Women that hurdled Cattle..
Birth giving women..
Tear dropping women
God Fearing women

There were these Women....
Yellow Women
Red-Boned Women
Community Women...Tribal Women...Single Women
Sexual women..
Big Butt Women..Wide hip Women...Part like the sea, every-time the Moon shines Women
Back-breaking Women..Tree Hugging Women
These Warrior Women..Samurai Women
Gift Giving and Life Saving Women

There are these Women....These Troubled women..These Cursed Women
These Tied to Stakes and burned on Crosses Women.
There are these Beat Women..These Bruised and Scorned Women
Mutilated Women...These Hurt and Battered Women

There are
Indian Women
Ko-nichi-wa women
Blue-Black women
Mesopotamian Women...Amazonian Women..African Women
Rulers and Servers
Concubines and Spies
The Gossipers and the Secret Dwellers..Them Women
The work 2 and 3 jobs Women
The Mad and Tired Women
Flying Women
Floating Women
Straight Haired Women
Nappy Headed Women
In the Mountains ...In Wet Soil
No Breasted..and Bare Tittied Swinging Women

These Women....
Regal
Tall
Short..
Strong
Meek

These Women..
Like Pink Diamonds and Black Pearls..
Like Lotus Flowers and Blue Butterflies
Rare, Valuable, Treasured, Sacred, Admired, Original, and Eternal WOMEN.

Cold Bed

2011-03-14T20:35:00.000-07:00

What I wanted to say was.."I want more."

What I wanted to say was .."I want more, because I deserve more."

What I REALLY wanted to say, when the phone rang..once I finally answered it.. was..."I want more, because I deserve more and I'm tired of feeling used."

                       But.....

What I said was "Hey baby---Yeah, I'm sorry. I've been busy--- I miss you too--- Yeah...it's cool, you can come by---I'll be ready. Bye"

WTF!!!!!!

What I should have said was; "Hey! Yeah, I know you been calling..I've been busy. Anyway, I know why your calling and I haven't been in the mood. Actually, I'm not sure if I'll ever (BE) in the mood again. You only call me when you want something. Usually sex. It was cool for a while, but now I'm bored and I want more out of sex. Or better yet, I want more with my sex. It's nothing personal really. You were great. But, honestly I don't think about you until the next time you call. Your not my type and not someone that I would want a serious relationship from... So...umm..I don't wanna fuck you anymore. And...umm..don't call me anymore. Goodbye."

                         But.....
When I heard your voice, thoughts of not being alone and thoughts of finally feeling safe enough to sleep..became more important.   I felt that maybe me settling for you and having warmth for just 1 more night, isn't as bad...as my cold empty bed.

He does

2011-03-11T13:18:00.000-08:00

He does..

I screamed from the kitchen in my loudest, sweetest voice..."I love you as long as the Sun SHINES...and the Water FLOWS!" with a smile so bright.

(Footsteps)

Behind me appears...and whispers in my ear "I love you even if the Sun never shined and all I could do was feel you. I love you even if there was no water. Your wet kisses are more than enough to keep me hydrated"

poker face

2010-11-25T08:23:00.000-08:00

The Secret, aint no secret in Kells; the movie | MANTRA

2010-10-18T07:39:00.000-07:00

The Secret, aint no secret in Kells; the movie | MANTRA

Massive Attack - Live With Me

2010-10-01T05:34:00.000-07:00

Om Namah Shivaya ! Shivaya Namah Om !

2010-09-30T08:00:00.000-07:00

Hardcore Max | MANTRA

2010-09-29T19:35:00.000-07:00

Hardcore Max | MANTRA

Victor Victorious

2010-09-27T21:03:00.000-07:00

On the couch, I begin mending a pillows tattered corner; (the puppies defeated foe)

On the couch, he sits jibber jabbering and chitter chattering...

He's rambling about all of his many escapades; this one and that one..

He's bustling about all of his conquests. How he beat this one and that one... HIM "The Undefeated Champion".. The "Victor Victorious".
Strong and Mighty
Big and Broad

"Umph...umm hmm." I graciously nod, while threading in and out..

"I had him by his throat... I beat the crap out of that stupid son of a bitch...I kicked him..and slapped the shit out of him...talking to me; like he lost his mutha-fucking mind.."

"Umm hmmm" I moan.

(Desperately seeking more of my attention)

He speaks of his riches and wealth..
He boasts about his "fleet" of cars... His priceless artifacts; all of his expensive gems from this place and that place.

All of his globe trotting journeys; spit from his thick tongue, and how he met this celebrity and that one..

Occasionally, glancing up from the pillow; in and out I weave.

"Such a beautiful, peaceful process" I think. "Ah, sewing".
The background factory Elephant shit that he keeps producing, I desperately try to tune out..

In and out I sew, the silver shiny needle firm between my fingers.

"I did this... I'm gonna do that."

"Umm..hmm." I deeply exhale..

"Almost finished" I think. I plucked the string, fluffed the pillow, and tucked it behind me..

"Umm..hmm." I say mimicking...while re-threading the needle

and.....

In one GIANT LEAP; like Superman.. I flew into the air and did a half-second turn... and... like Michael Jordan, I dunked that needle in the center of his top lip straight down to the bottom.

I moon-walked with the needle like Michael Jackson...I sang with it like Billy Holiday...

"I float like a butterfly and sting like a bee" I shouted... I AM Muhammad Ali!

I sutured in and out....fast like lightening..fast like a cheetah

...at the final thread I snipped, like the worlds greatest surgeon....and...

Like Jesse James, I swung my scissors around my pointer..blew of the steam, and shoved them into my back pocket..

Like Nadia Comaneci, I flipped backwards (missing the coffee table) and spun into the air with shiny weapon held high...like the boy Arthur in "The Sword in the Stone"...

Then I slammed my faithful weapon on the floor and shouted "Touch Down!" and did my twinkle-toes football dance..

......He didn't know what hit him.

Shooter

2010-09-27T20:56:00.000-07:00

I keep rubber bands fixed around my wrist...
Most people think it's to swiftly pull my hair back...
But, mainly it's because....
I like shooting them at testicles and tits.

Grocery Store Fool

2010-09-27T20:52:00.000-07:00

So, I met this guy in the supermarket who said that, he knew me..

I swore he didn’t. He said, “We shared the same group of friends in college and that we always hung out together.”

I swear we hadn’t. He said, “Baby, I promise I know you, you just don’t remember.”

I said, “Man. I promise YOU don’t know me, and I do remember.”

He grabbed me by my arm, and faced me eye to eye… intensely, he said, “I know you.”..

“Umph.” my tongue glazed my bottom lip…

So….. I took him home…and….devoured him….. No one, has seen him since..

Just One Of The Girls

2010-09-27T20:46:00.000-07:00

I love how I can throw on a pair of jogging pants, and a tank top...

How I can pull my hair in a ponytail, with any colored band.. Top it off with a loose open sweat shirt and fuzzy socks..

How I can strut around the house with clear face, and not a hint of hue on my lips. No jewelry or polish. No glitter or bronzer.

Unforced freedom..

I really like, how I can plop on the couch in my nerdiest glasses and a book; chips and tea, not far from reach. Kick back in the laziest of slouches; as if I haven't a care in the world..

It's quite rewarding... (really)....

Especially, when I know that there's a sweet secret, underneath...

...a leather thong with polka-dot bow in back..and matching leather pasties, that dangle silver tassels. A diamond belly chain and leather cuffs on each ankle. A henna tattoo of a serpent lines my back..

Ahh. so comforting, to be just like all the other girls..

Polka-dot Pillow

2010-09-27T20:39:00.000-07:00

Bliss tickles my red polish toe

The night before ensues on my fingertip; to my lips I delightfully place.

Hmm.. the subtle taste of deceit and defeat holds my tongue.

No matter, pleasure is all mine, this morning.

Entranced with lids closed, my eyes mimic the scene…

Moisture thickens, and my bare thighs chill

My back stiffens to reveal the burgundy scratches that mark my shoulder blades

A cold yellow towel, I wipe down my face.

Black mascara blotched spots and violet eyeshadow, paint

I rinse and wring.. behind my neck I place..my glare whistles from the mirror

A tender, raised smile shines back

Erect and high… I return to the lipsticked-stained, pink, polka-dot pillow, that eagerly awaits my muffled high-pitched shrieks.

The Box

2010-09-27T20:37:00.000-07:00

I’m a selfish girl I know…

If you can’t hold me right, don’t try to hold me at all.

I don’t need you to love me, cause I wouldn’t know what it was, if you did.

I just need you to pack and unwrap me, every time you see me. Delicately remove my bow, gently loosen the tape, carefully release the wrapping paper, softly lift the lid, tenderly pull back the tissue, and with an “ooh ahh” from you lips; patiently lift me and pull me close. Lovingly hold me close.
Now, quick and swift…precisely put me back….patiently tuck me in the box, tenderly cover me with tissue, softly replace the lid, carefully re-wrap the paper, gently stick the tape, and delicately adorn my bow.

I know that I am fragile, a bit damaged, cunningly beastly…. but you don’t…You can’t see it. You won’t be able to recognize it, even if you did… by chance… have one unspeakable moment to peer into me…It’s too ghastly and lurid for you to comprehend.

You are too perfect, so perfect to ever know evil; even when your holding it in your hands.

So, put me back… in the box….quick.

The Reason

2010-09-27T20:36:00.000-07:00

I used to be afraid to sleep and live alone.....until I...
remembered and rekindled the evil that was once shown to me; so long ago.
Now, I fear no man...
I already bedded the devil...so "they" should fear me.

Pretty Red Stockings

2010-09-27T20:32:00.000-07:00

"Pretty Red Stockings....Pretty Red Stockings...Pretty Red Stockings.."

I whimsically sing..placing pointed toes, followed by left leg; into the stocking

(Humming)..."hum.hum...hum...hum.hum" settling my right foot into the stocking....

around my heel, up my ankle, past my knee, now, stuck at my thigh...

"Pretty Red Stockings....Pretty Red Stockings...Pretty Red Stockings.." I gleefully, sing.

Spreading my fingers wide apart, while showcasing and idolizing my stockings, I rub out the kinks, and stretch them high.

I leaped onto the kitchen table; with fingers gripping the edge. Childishly kicking my legs, back and forward, forward and back...loving the cold lacquer beneath me..my hips shutter as my red legs dance. Subtle ripples of flesh and muscle jerk with each kick. I watch my thighs glow when they contract; highlighted by my glorious stockings. (I smile)

Feverishly, I kick wildly...back and forth on the table, "swing stockings, swing.." My hips rotating to the melody...The table squeaks and softly bumps the floor...I swing, kick, gyrate, and shake.

Abruptly, he appears...(a minute too soon)...I'm caught in the act..

Forcefully, he tugs and lifts my scarlet legs overhead.

Frantically, I scream as I watch my "Pretty Red Stockings" hit the floor.

Lover's Embrace

2010-09-27T20:29:00.000-07:00

He circled me with rugged arms. His palms pulsating up my spine, then restless at my rump.
My ear he tasted, My neck he sipped. With his teeth he pulled away wisp of hair from blocking my gaze.
The creases of my eye, he licked. My cheek he tugged. The tip of my nose he pecked. Down his tongue withered, aiming for his final destination...."Hey!" I stammered, while turning my head away.. "I told you, I don't kiss."

"Awe, sweetheart...I'm not gon' bite cha" reaching for my bottom lip. "No." I ordered. "I already told you, I don't kiss."

"Why not?" pleading.."We been together for quite some time now, don't you trust me?"

Tenderly, I placed my hands at his jaw, and locked eyes.. "Yes. babe. I trust you." I know that you would never do anything to hurt me" ...ending with.... "Your the sweetest guy I know"..

"Well, alright then, why won't you kiss me?" he huffed.

Holding in and holding myself down.... I responded "I do kiss you. YOU just can't kiss ME; here" (pointing to my lips).. "No big deal..really"..
Trying to make light of the situation, I playfully shove him away...

With his might; he forcefully grabbed me by my wrist. With one arm, he tucked the back of my head into his elbow, and the other; he held my hands... Deeper he pressed, pressing his lips into mine..Firmly clinched, I remained. Hoping and praying that he would give up. He pressed and pressed, mumbling... "Open up, open up" (between teeth and tongue)

Gradually, I rose...I climbed...I ascended...
with a rumble from my abdomen, and pinch from my navel, I spun through my liver, spiraled pass my heart, I fluffed my lungs and up my esophagus, I bustled. Rushing from my throat, I pushed... I pushed.. I stomped the roof of my mouth and punched my teeth...painfully I released. I burst, I poured and exploded from my lips into his. I desecrated his orifice, trampled along his tongue, raced down his throat, cracked his lungs, and obliterated his heart..

With a pinkie finger nudge, he toppled flat on his back...

Shameless I glared down at him. From side to side, my head shook; "Tis. Tis."

I grabbed him with both hands. By his right wrist I yanked him out the door. On every downward step, his body bled. He bled on the sidewalk, the graveled driveway and wet grass.

At the curb, I left him.

I dusted my knees and wrung my hands. A swoosh of mop water hit the pavement, clear drops dangled from the porch. I swept and sprinkled sea-salt that blew in the night-time air.

Inside I retreated, and scented the air with Patchouli perfume.

I plopped on the sofa, reared back, and put my feet up on the table, only to discover the only memory, left behind....

..................a tinged bleach spot on the hardwood floor.

Comic Superhero

2010-09-27T20:27:00.000-07:00

Ring..Ring..Ring..

“I’m on my way”.. he urgently replied.

He made a mad dash down the side walk, in white crew socks, blue boxers and red flawless cape.. Across 4th street, past the flower shop, the magazine stand, the liqueur store, and the grocery…

Speaking in his wrist phone as he flew. (Breathing heavily) “I’m almost there.. I’m at 7th street..”

“You better hurry!” the caller pleads.

Fast he sprints. Around light post, hurdling over parked cars, and slashing his feet with broken glass, on the pissed covered concrete.

“I’m here” bending over, clutching his knee....he pants into his wrist phone….

“She’s on the roof.” the caller announces.

He steps back, his beautiful cape blowing behind him…Up he squints..at the 16th story building.. “I see her” he puffs.

Breaking the glass of the apartment door, he bursts through the unlocked door…Through the lobby he flies, eying the elevator, but decides to take the stairs… “The elevator..may be broken” he thinks.

Up the stairs he climbs.. His knees crack..and ankles buckle from the countless over the banister jumps.

“I’m at the 15th flight”..he huffs..

“I’m coming.. I’m coming.. I’m coming” he screams… “Please.. wait…I’m coming..”

He bustles onto the rooftop… wheezing heavily…Surveying the scene.. There she is!..

….Her white coat blows in the breeze..lifting and displaying her bright-red panties. Her pale feet, uneasy on the ledge…Auburn, ringlet hair covers her face..
Admiring the placement of her feet, she gazes at her shiny polished toes. Her huge-eyes peer through her hair as the metal door clangs behind him.

“Hmm”..she smirks.. He’s come to save me.

“I’ve come to save you!..” in his stern, loud, lingering; Superman Voice.

The corner of the left side of her mouth, rises.. sweetly she replies “Who said I needed saving?” Still viewing him between her hair..

“I’ve come to save you”, he echos….

“Okay..” she giggles.. She carefully unfastens her coat, her fingers tremble with each unloosed button.

“What will you save?” she asks. As she stands; displaying her bare breast shown through her open coat..

She cups both breast in her hands.. “Will you save these?” she snickers..

“I’m just here to help, Miss. I’ll do whatever I need to do.” Inching closer to her.

“What’s the matter? How can I help? Is that it? Are you unhappy about your body?”

She laughs and bends to dangle her tits… he immediately draws nearer..

“Oh, these ol’ things, I don’t give a damn about these.” she smiles while slightly wavering along the concrete edge.

“Miss! Please! Be careful.. Why don’t you just get down from there, and we can discuss it safely on the ground, please… I’m just here to help.” He carefully walks to her, reaching his hand out for her..

Mockingly she responded.. “Thank you kindly, sir. But, like I said. I don’t need saving. I don’t need your help.”

“You must.” he stampers… Your standing half naked on a ledge..aren’t you trying to lose your life?”

She yells… “Who the hell said that I was living, anyway.. You stupid, ignorant fuck..I’ve been dead for a while now.. me jumping off this ledge will be my best chance at ever living again..”

“Okay Okay.. calm down.. calm down”..He soothes… I just want to help..you know you could do this another day.. Why don’t we go out for tea, or coffee..a bite to eat, maybe? Just spend a little time with me.. We can talk about whatever you like..I just want to help.”

She smiles, and blows the bangs from her eyes, “Okay” (whispering). She held her hand out to him, which he reached to take… she laughed and snatched back..

He immediately lunges for her, (her red heels brush the edge) and back she falls… Only her white coat left hanging in his hands.

He lowers his head, presses the button on his wrist phone… (solemnly) “I lost another one, Joe… I lost another one.” …

He removes his treasured cape and shamefully shuffles in his underwear and bloody socks…to the elevator, through the crowds of people, on the dirty streets, back to his box…on 3rd street.

Bike

2010-09-27T20:07:00.000-07:00

Ring.ding.ring.ding. She playfully clicks the bell.

Magnetic Butterflies flutter their wings along the white metal, basket. Baby blue and pastel pink, chrome wheels. She rides. Her seat is extra high, because she likes to feel taller than what she is.
White leather tassels hanging from the handle bars. A sparkly gold bell, with red, yellow, and blue glitter adorns the center.

Wearing her favorite pink, converse tennis shoes with red laces, a blue-jean ruffled skirt, and guitar tee. A funky gray cap, barely fits over her hair.

What a beautiful sunny day. She sticks her chest out, like a blue crested bird. Happy to be Happy.

She rides.

Ring.ding.ring.ding. Clicking the bell.

“Good morning!” She playfully sings; “Good Morning to all the Saturday warriors, lawn mowing and yard working.”

Swaying side to side, with her hands loosely gripping the bars. Ring.ding.ring.ding. “I bet they envy me.” she thinks.

She hums and coasts with legs stretched out. The purple cushion beneath her cools her moist thighs.

Ring.ding.ring.ding. Clicking the bell, back and forth.

Eyebrows raise as she glides by….”Good morning!”.. she announces to everyone she passes. Sometimes, waving fanatically and grinning extra hard.

Pedaling and coasting.. laughing within and giggling softly.

Around the corner, she spins… wheels squeaking, and dust floating as she parks. Down the kick-stand drops. Swiftly jumping from her seat she proudly stands at the side of her stallion, and gives a moment of admiration for her most trusted companion. Once finished, she flicks then clicks the bell with her bony pointer.

She waits.

Ring.ding.ring.ding.click….Ring.ding.ring.ding.click.. She anxiously wrings her hands while circling her bike. Ring.ding.ring.ding.click.

“Where is he?” she huffs while gritting her teeth.

Kicking the gravel with her pretty shoes..

Ring.ding.ring.ding.click. Ring.ding.ring.ding. click. Ring.ding.ring.ding.click.

She groans, stamps, then screams…”Paul!.. Paul!..PAUL!!!” Ring.ding.ring.ding.click..Ring.ding.ring.ding.click…
Ring..ding…

The door squeaks, and he peers..smiling.. “What are you doing?”

She looks..bitterly at him, with her right hand on her hip, she shouts.. “Well, I’m out here ringing and ringing you and you act like you don’t hear me.. Damn!!! How many times do I have to ring the fucking bell?!

He looks.. wide eyed..”What?”.. he whispers.

YOU heard me!!!.. Screaming and pointing. “I’m out here ringing this damn bell…over and over again and YOUR acting like you don’t hear me. You inconsiderate ass!”

“Oh.. Okay. I’m sorry babe. I was in the shower. Why didn’t you just come to the door?”

“Why would I? You DICK! I shouldn’t have to, if I’m ringing this fucking bell, shit.”

He opens the door wide to allow her to bring the bike in.

Forcefully, she pushes open the door even wider, just to bang the nob on the wall.

“Dammit Paul! I was having a good ride and you just fucked it all up.” She pouts. “Why are you always so selfish?”

“Oh.. I’m sorry baby..I guess I had the water up too loud.. It won’t happen again, I promise.”

“What? the water too loud? I thought we already talked about you turning down the water…”
(shaking her head) “Your gonna fuck your mind up if you keep having it up like that.
Dang.. Pauly..do I have to teach you everything?” while smirking and pinching his cheeks.

He hunches his shoulders and locks the bike at the door.

She grabs the wooden banister and heads for the top of the stairs. Behind her he peers.

“I see you rode without panties again”.

She bends over and says.. “Don’t I always; silly.” (SMILE)

Combat Boots

2010-09-27T20:05:00.001-07:00

In and out my life you stomp…
in combat boots

On the bed I lay…On the bed I stayed. I don’t think I have ever been in that room and not been on the bed.

You danced on my dreams and goals… in combat boots.

I guess it would’ve have been an even fight if I had a machete and arsenal of ammunition. But, I wore pastel tutu-skirts and converse chucks. I liked glitter and sugar dust, feathered on every part of me.

My favorite color was pink and candy scents clouded my space. Young and sweet; with curly, light colored hair. A flowering fairy and free-giving, wild-child.

For nights and days, you took what you never owned..Innocence, Naivety, Joy, Peace, Beauty, Light, and Love. You ripped them from me, and tucked them in your boots. Attracted to my glow but not able to comprehend it’s nature. You dissected it..dismantled it, and now it jingles like keys in your pockets.

The curiosity in me, allows you to stay. In and out my life, you march in combat boots. You stomp away and kick down doors to come back in.

Even when you are gone.. (I guess rummaging and pillaging some other poor soul)…You’ve tattooed yourself on my every existence; all I do is think of you.. even when love fights so hard to kill you.. You always manage to slay it.

My lover dead at my feet, and face covered in your spit… You laugh and jump on his back.

Bent over and up against the wall… (once again). Tears and glee blush my cheeks. A sinful sick soul, I am too. Nauseous of a true lovers touch. Only longing for your gleaming sword. A wicked bastard-for true. But, damn..I must be pretty wicked too, to allow you to do the deeds you do.

In and out of my life in combat boots… You’ve showed me so much evil. Your pain is now my pleasure. The innocence I crave.. The love I devour then throw up, because it’s taste sickens me. The sweetness, only masks my face until my goal is achieved.

Now.. my pretty pink tutu’s are black.. poisoned dust laces my skin. I stash blades in my panties and a contagious disease flows from my kiss. Midnight hair and blood tinted lips…dark eyed with heartless glare..

Hate hides in my gloved hand, and I dare a soul to survive in my bed.