Community to Ivy

Without Youuuuuuuuu I feeeellll INNNCOMPLEEETEE!

2017-12-14T04:54:00.000-05:00

I hit the skids once again at the end of this semester. The straight dope: I crashed and nearly burned when I overworked myself. Thinking I'd be leaving in the middle of winter, I took on a nearly full time schedule at work to save as much money as possible for a move (in the city or elsewhere). Nearing finals, I was weeks behind on work and exhausted and nowhere the mindset need for finishing strong, arranging a move in the city in the middle of winter, and . That's when my advisor suggested I stay until May, and revealed that you don't have to be registered full time in your final semester to keep housing.

And so, after semesters of emotional hell, I did the unthinkable.

I delayed graduation and I'm staying....by choice until the end of May.

The Final Countdown

2017-09-13T14:16:00.000-04:00

Hey everyone,
I hate to say it, but microblogging platforms...facebook and instagram have taken over. It's downright weird to read this blog after not touching it all for a year and a half.

Suffice it to say, a lot happened. Columbia attempted to financially expel me. I feel no remorse calling it that. I can't pay right now and my credit is trashed from the recession, it's been a problem since I got here, everyone in the admin knew about it. I was far from the only person going into debt directly to the school because private loans weren't an option. A lot of us left. Few of us found a way.

Mine included taking an unpaid internship that transitioned to a theatre management position at an off-Broadway venue in Hell's Kitchen. I love my job, I'm good at my job, and the money is good. Working this job allowed me to set up a six month deal for $4000 in payments to the school in exchange for being able to register for my final two semesters. I was within a week of being evicted from housing because of my situation and I'm going to keep fighting on behalf of my fellow student's because the current system is set up to let the less financially able, but just as talented - get in, accrue debt many times directly owning the school not private lenders,only to be told by the bursar that it's for our own good if we aren't allowed to finish/are forced to leave with a mountain of debt and with out completing our requirements.

TL:DR I got a job, earned money, ransomed my registration rights, and now - after 11 years, I'm completing my bachelor's requirements at the end of December. (I will not be allowed my diploma until the money owed school directly is paid in full, so I should see it so.metime around 2027.) The Course reqs are updated and....we're almost home free.

Final Update

2016-02-27T10:12:00.001-05:00

This is going to be the final update for a while. Here are my grades from the past two semesters.

Fall 2015
SHAKESPEARE I             B-
ELEMENTARY SPANISH II         C+
THEATRE TRAD GLOBAL CONTEXT    A-
ACTING SOLO PERFORMANCE      B+

Spring 2015
MASTERPIECES OF WESTERN M    C+
ELEMENTARY SPANISH I        C+
ACTING THE SONG            C
LIGHTING DESIGN            D
REHEARSAL AND PERFORMANCE    A

Feeling Like a Tourist

2015-05-21T14:40:00.004-04:00

"First, I'm trying to prove to myself that I'm a person. Then maybe I'll convince myself that I'm an actress." - Marilyn Monroe

I studied theatre and earned my associates in it three years ago. I have worked with theatre companies big and small, never in a performance role though. I continue to study at one of the most prestigious universities in the world, and was awarded a solo-performance thesis. And yet...I feel like a tourist in my own industry. Why?

Body image and self-esteem have admittedly more to do with it than I like. Only recently have plus-size role models like Rebel Wilson and Melissa McCarthy come forward to usher in an era of being big and talented and ok with yourself, in the US. Somehow these women have figured out how to value themselves enough, to have enough confidence internally that they consider their work valuable to others. This leaves me about 20% envious and 80% curious. I want to investigate,I want to know how that happened, because while I cannot speak for all plus or curvy women, I know that many of us already consider ourselves to be a sort of other at base.

That's a harsh realization, but an honest one. One, that needs to be acknowledged before any sort of self-reparation can begin. And, not just with women, but men too - people, in the western world have so largely gotten caught up in the lives of "The Digital Jones'," that our own successes start to pail in comparison. So how do we get back?

I Am Not An Other

Saying these words are effortless. Especially for anyone with acting in their background. Just conjure up a vision of the most confident person you can think of an lie to yourself a little. Actually believing this, is another matter all together. Confidence despite flaws, including weight, is so foreign an idea that it is used as comic fodder or applauded because of it's rarity. An exoticness is tacked on to someone who deviates from the norm with detached and convinced bliss, and thus owning that you are not supposed to act a certain way because of how you look makes you rare, and in that rarity lies a power to control your options more.

Fall Grades and Redux

2015-01-17T10:57:00.000-05:00

FALL 2014
B+ Global Urbanism - Global Core Req - 3 Credits
B History and Practice of Producing - Major Req - 4 credits
C History and Practice of Directing - Major Req - 3 credits
B- Art Hum - Art Hum Req - 3 Credits

The Moon is Big in the White Harlem Sky

2014-11-04T16:23:00.000-05:00

They refer to us as apathetic....the worst generation. In reality, we are disillusioned - as disillusioned as they once were, but with the ability to fight ripped from our hands.

I didn't forget, I'm not ignorant of what this all means, I'm just not happy with any of the players in the bloodsport they refer to as American Politics. What a fucking art form. The highest and most respected one in the land, certainly the best funded.

You want to send a message, create? Fine crawl through the mud, become a professional beggar for favor. Shakespeare did it. Bernini too...although he made sure to not let anyone remember his dissidence by writing anything down, lest the wrong patron be pissed off.

I can't revolt.

I can't fight.

Doing so would make me wrong and cheat me out of my own progress. You too.

Someone will be along to pick up the tab, shortly.

So we wait. We wait for the change the fear mongers and political spelunkers assure us is coming. Wait for relevance. Too much like the string quartet on a sinking ship, even the rats have abandoned.

We've lost. We've lost and worse, we aren't even sure what game we are playing.

Reverberation is nauseating.

I can't revolt.

I can't fight.

It would make me one of 'those people.'

Revolution is a precious commodity now. How much for that Che Guevara shirt, those ripped jeans?

800,000,000 easy payments of $56, 000 should do the trick. Maybe.

Shut up you stupid cog. Here have a grant, a scholarship, a free gift with purchase, 10% off your next purchase of $17 trillion or more. Yours now if you get the most retweets, the most clicks.

In A Late Hail Mary Pass...

2014-09-12T09:27:00.002-04:00

...Korean's officially out, so are all hopes of Spanish. Art Hum! You're up!

And I And Silence

2014-09-10T15:41:00.000-04:00

Silence makes me think of Silence Dogood, who I learned of from National Treasure. It was a pseudonym a young (like, 16 young) Ben Franklin concocted to write into his...brother's...newspaper to express his views on popular culture and politics ect.

The musings of a 16 year old colonial white male apprentice printer, are hardly to be considered worthwhile, and yet Silence spoke with such veracity, she received marriage proposals.

In Naomi Wallace's jarring sketch, we are presented with a reverberation of that tenacity. Two young women, Dee and Jamie, minor offenders locked up in what has become the generationallly, perpetual gray area of adolescence. High School Musical meets Orange is the New Black, this isn't, however. We are also granted glimpses into the lives of the, now, women nine years on - post incarceration.

It's 1959, as Older Jamie actress Rachel Nicks points out...in some nondescript corner of the semi-rural American south. Not a good time or place to be a woman, where old world wealth and status standards still reign. Not a good time or place in history for African Americans, where walking down the street to work means verbal abuse on a good day.

The setting and all of it's trappings create a sort of perfect storm for Wallace's two characters. With a steely undercurrent of the violability of their sexualities and the vulnerability of intimacy, Wallace has Jamie and Dee traverse the crossroads of what it means to be young, broke, and drowning in surroundings suffering the same fate. By the play's tragic end we're left with a Willy Loman sense of remorse, except they don't even get the faithful spouse or regretful kids. A stark, nearly Shakespearean realization sets in, in death - no one will miss these girls.

Surely, no one missed them in life.

Directors and Producers of Work I've Seen Recently

2014-09-05T18:36:00.001-04:00

So, my Directing professor posed an interesting question at the top of class and since I'm horrible with on the spot things, I came up with nothing...I wasn't the only one. The question was name all the theatrical directors you know.

So doing my due diligence here is a list of the directors I've got in in my playbill collection. I'm including producers too, because I realize the same question was also relevant to Producing Class. Keep in mind this is only what I had playbills lying around for.

And I and Silence -
dir. Caitlin McLeod
prod. Signature Theatre
Juarez: A Documentary Mythology
dir. Ruben Polendo
prod. Theater Mitu/Rattlestick Playwrights Theater
The Correspondent
dir. Steven Brackett
prod. Rattlestick Playwrights Theater
King Lear
dir. Arin Arbus
prod. Theatre For A New Audience
Antony and Cleopatra
dir. Tarell Alvin McCraney
prod.Gable Stage, The Royal Shakespeare Company in Collaboration with the Ohio State University (Jeremy Adams)
asso prod. Maria Goyanes
Love and Information
dir. James Macdonald
prod. NYTW in asso. with Royal Court Theatre
The Long Shrift
dir. James Franco
prod. Rattlestick Playwrights Theater
Phoenix
dir. Jennifer Delia
prod. Nicholas Jabbour, Julie Pacino, Poverty Row Entertainment, Rian Patrick Durham, Rattlestick Playwrights Theater
Inventing Van Gogh
dir. Karla Hartley
prod. Jobsite Theatre
S'wonderful
dir. Tripp Hampton
prod. David A. Straz Jr. Center for the Performing Arts
Priscilla Queen of the Desert the Musical
dir. Simon Philips
prod. Allan Scott, Troika Entertainmenrt, Nullarbor Productions Ltd., in asso with MGM on Stage and Darcie Denkert, Dean Stolber Gary McQuinn, Liz Koops, Michael Hamlyn,
Spank! The Fifty Shades Parody
dir. Jim Millan
prod. Michael Mills/Mills Entertainment
Morningside Nights: The 120th Annual Varsity Show
dir. Emily Feinstein
prod. Allie Carieri, Ally Engleberg, Renee Kraiem
Hamlet
dir. C. David Frankel
prod. Tampa Repertory Theatre, Hat Trick Theatre Productions
The Ballad of Hipster McBigballs
dir. Christen Petit Haley
prod. Jobsite Theatre
Night of Power
dir. Kareem Fahmy
prod. Meghan Long (Columbia School of the Arts Theatre)
A Thousand Clowns
dir. Jack Holloway
prod. Hat Trick Theatre Productions
The Physicists
dir. Sina Heiss
prod. Mia Shen
All the Way
dir. Bill Rauch
prod. Jeffrey Richards, Louise Gund, Jerry Frankel, Stephanie P. McClelland, Double Gemini Productions, Rebecca Gold, Scott M. Delman, Barbara Freitag, Harvey Weinstein, Gene Korf, William Berlind, Caiola Productions, Gutterman Chernoff, Jam Theatricals, Gabrielle Palitz, Cheryl Wiesenfeld and Will Trice; Associate Producer: Rob Hinderliter & Dominick LaRuffa, Jr., Michael Crea and PJ Miller
Twelfe Night, or What You Will
dir. Tim Carroll
prod. Sonia Friedman Productions, Scott Landis, Roger Berlind, Glass Half Full Productions/Just For Laughs Theatricals, 1001 Nights Productions, Tulchin/Bartner Productions, Jane Bergère, Paula Marie Black, Rupert Gavin, Stephanie P. McClelland, Shakespeare Globe Centre USA, Max Cooper, Tanya Link Productions and Shakespeare Road
Wake
dir. Mei Ann Teo
prod. Mariana Ortiz
Neville's Island
dir. Gi Young Sung
prod. Hat Trick Theatre Productions
The Meeting
dir. Alan Bomar Jones, Bryant Bentley
prod. Hillsborough Community College
Evening of Shorts
dir. Jack Holloway/Kerry Glamsch
prod. David A. Straz Jr. Center for the Performing Arts
Jeffrey
dir. Keith Odums
prod. Hat Trick Theatre Productions
Titus Andronicus
dir.Helen Tennison
prod. University of South Florida School of Theatre and Dance
And Then There Were None
dir. Jack Holloway
prod. Hat Trick Theatre Productions
Musings of a Post Modern Romantic
dir Matthew Ray
prod. TRT²
Twelfth Night or What You Will
dir. Julia Flood
prod. Eckerd Theater Company
Hay Fever
dir. David Jenkins
prod. Jobsite Theater
Wicked
dir. Joe Mantello
prod. Marc Platt, Universal Pictures, The Araca Group, Jon B. Platt, David Stone,
The Amish Project
dir. Todd Olson
prod. American Stage Theater Company

Summer

2014-08-05T09:22:00.000-04:00

Loads of little updates to the stat trackers, some I'm not thrilled or proud of, some I couldn't be more ecstatic about. However, the Florida summer has been kind. I'm brown, have a new hobby/sport, and I haven't experienced the usual fattening I usually do when I come down. About three weeks or from returning and I feel trepidation most of all. Being a native Floridian you never realize how much of a permanent vacation home is. It seems so incredibly easy and warm and pretty.

BORED

2014-03-29T13:24:00.003-04:00

Source: http://www.pinterest.com/pin/63050463507588623/

2014-03-11T21:23:00.001-04:00

Paper possibilities
Politics of desire, choices of desire and the consideration of government leadership in Antony and Cleopatra. IRL Historical considerations. Cleopatra balancing being a head of state with corporeal desires and attractions. Internal fight against her own weakness of desire.

Joni Mitchell A Case of You - Parallels to Antony and Cleopatra?
"Just before our love got lost you said,
"I am as constant as a northern star."
And I said, "Constantly in the darkness,
Where's that at?
If you want me I'll be in the bar."

Joni and The Bard?

Ironic foreshadowing of 1.3.100-102:

C: And all the gods go with you. Upon your sword
Sit laurel victory, and smooth success
Be strewed before your feet.
A: Let us go.
Come. Our separation so abides and flies
That thou residing here goes yet with me,
And I hence fleeting, here remain with thee.
Away.

Magical language attached to Cleopatra. Instances of supernaturalization of women in Shakespeare?

Something New

2014-02-04T13:13:00.000-05:00

I have indeed forged a lot of new territory this semester (check out the adventure recap to the right!) Unfortunately, it hasn't all been city roaming and stellar academics. I was very sick in January through February.

Resolutions

2014-01-26T21:22:00.000-05:00

So I made three resolutions after putting some thought into what was truly lacking from self-improvement the past year. First, I feel like I've been in the greatest city in the world for 5 months, and have seen next to none of it. So,

Resolution #1: Have one adventure day a month. Do this as cheaply as possible. Record and reflect.

I also felt like I wasn't getting to know my new city and that I could do so by giving back. So,

Resolution #2: Have a day of service every month in which I find a volunteer opportunity to engage in in the city. Record and reflect.

Finally, I felt like I was severely underread in the drama department in all periods so,

Resolution #3: Read/see one new play a week
Oh, hey look at that list up over there in the top left...

So that's it...
Self betterment? Maybe. Meet new people. Most definitely. Make new friends. Very possibly. I'm looking forward to this.

Something like a 3-oh...

2014-01-03T19:17:00.000-05:00

Ahoy from Florida...it's a chipper 40 something. I'm reading some Garrison Keillor fiction, and still utterly tired. I'm of a good mind to take the semester off to watch the spring come in on the beach.

That's no good though...

Forgive, I'm running a fever at the moment so my malaise is both dazing and exasperating.

Anyway, my last grade came in today (finally), and it's higher than I hoped. The professor and I jerked each other around enough, I was just happy to be done with it.

Ballet and English Conference were both passes (P's), and as such don't count towards the GPA... :\
Western Theatre Traditions was a solid B
Advanced Acting Lab was a solid B
Arabia Imagined a B-

So, a 2.8680 ...call it a 2.9? Which is something very close to a 3.0...right? Right?

Stats are updated, so is what's on deck.

Things really fell apart this semester...I fell apart this semester, and rallied but the damage may be done.

I wonder...

2013-11-16T16:22:00.000-05:00

what the Drosselmeyer house was like the rest of the year? In every production of The Nutcracker I've ever seen, I cannot picture it in any thing other than a perpetual state of "Christmasness."

http://www.gofundme.com/48ovzo

The Hour Still Starts With 3, Yet the Sun Doth Kiss the Horizon

2013-11-16T15:46:00.001-05:00

This is verily screwing with my internal clock...and I think I got a sunburn from sitting in the same spot. That's one reason to be happy the sun's gone down.

http://www.gofundme.com/48ovzo

Fear and (self) loathing in Las Cruces...

2013-11-16T15:40:00.001-05:00

It's been...bumpy.

A mass of text hath passed mine eyes and to much dismay, little if any has stuck.

I was called in to my adviser after my professor emailed her. I severely underperformed on a paper proposal, handing in five pages of outline and bibliography, when, as it turns out, he wanted a short version of the actual paper. It was (ludicrously) graded, and I was given a provisional "D". He's expecting a rewrite, well, the TA is expecting a rewrite.

After another will-call mishap, and needing time to focus on my two papers, I'm taking a couple weeks off from work. At a point, it's just too much and these are too important, I think I had forgotten that a little bit. No matter what the denoument of the semester is, whether I get the money to stay, have to return to Tampa because I don't, or take of...I need to have a decent GPA coming out of this semester not matter what happens.

http://www.gofundme.com/48ovzo

I passed!

2013-10-31T11:38:00.000-04:00

One class down, four to go. Hey, Hey! Look over there >

Happy Halloween and Blessed Samhain.

Waiting...waiting...waiting...and with a surprising lack of change...more waiting...

2013-10-14T17:27:00.000-04:00

So we got our Western Theatre papers back this morning...
Finally some hint at academic validation, my first real paper grade at Columbia...

W.B. handed it to me...lot's of comments...oo... Why did I leave that in? I don't remember leaving that in. Not anachronistic, achronistic... ACHRONISTIC! damn auto correct. *le sigh* "Good Connection, but... *le sigh some more* The TA is commenting a lot, W.B. isn't...why isn't he commenting? I...ugh...how is a Marx reference not obvious enough? How is the Locke reference not obvious enough? Everybody knows those theories. "Don't assume your reader knows anything." But assume we do, eh? Ha. That wasn't that funny. Well...nah not that funny. Your citations are funny. Funny bad, not funny haha. Are citations ever funny haha? Get to last page.

No grade.

Flip over. No grade. Class and Prof. long gone...
What's going on?
Where's my grade?

I...

Uh....what?

Dear God...
I was really tired. It was finished during an all-nighter, and every other sundry excuse ever used, by everyone, ever.

Was it that horrible? No, no-no. I mean he's not above just putting an F on a paper, right? Christ. Does he want me to rewrite? I'd love a rewrite.

*le sigh*

Emailed prof + TA. Waiting...patiently.

Oh, hey...look at that. This is my 100th post.

GoFundMe!

2013-10-06T12:16:00.000-04:00

So, I have started a go fund me account for help with my tuition this semester.
I'm happy to say I got my first donation! An anonymous donor chipped in $1000!
I'm kind of in shock. I can't believe it....I'm stunned.

If you want to find out why I"m asking for money or would like to donate, visit:

http://www.gofundme.com/48ovzo

Oh hey, look, I'm at 13%!

or click the gofundme donate button in the upper right corner.

Worklist week of 10/7

2013-10-05T10:32:00.001-04:00

Read/Annotate for Response: Ibn Hisham (d. 833), “Muhammad’s Ordinance for Medina.” Trans. Norman A. Stillman, 1979. The Jews of Arab Lands, 115-18.
(3 pages)

Read/Annotate for Response: Document of Protection (dhimma) Trans. N. Stillman, pp. 255-258.
(3 pages)

Read/Annotate for Response: Text: Maimonides (d. 1204), “Epistle to the Jews of Yemen.” Trans. Norman Stillman, pp. 233-46.
(13 pages)
Read/Annotate for Response: Texts: divorce documents. Trans. I. Hollander, “Ibrā’ in Highland Yemen: Two Jewish Divorce Settlements,” Islamic Law & Society 2(1)(1995):1-23.
(23 pages)
Read/Annotate for Response: Anthropology: Jewish “saints” Kosansky, Oren. Tourism, Charity, and Profit: the Movement of Money in Moroccan Jewish Pilgrimage,” Cultural Anthropology 17(3)(2002), 359-400.
(41 pages)
Due by 10/6, 10:00 PM - Write: 2 page Double Space Response with annotations on the above week 4 reading assignments
10/6 - Read/Ready for discussion: Jackson, "Professing Performance"
10/6 - Read/Annotate for Response: Worthen, "Disciplines of the Text/Sites of Performance"
10/7 - Skim/Ready for discussion:The Book of Margery Kempe pdf
10/9 - Read/Ready for discussion: The York Cycle: Fall of the Angels, Fall of Man, Building of the Ark, The Flood, Herod and Magi, Slaughter of the Innocents, Christ before Herod through Last Judgment
10/9 - Skim/Ready for discussion: Beckwith, from Signifying God
10/9 - Skim/Ready for discussion: Schechner, from "Collective Reflexivity: Restoration of Behavior"
10/9 - Review: Medieval Theatre Handout Online
10/9 - Skim/Ready for discussion Julian of Norwich pdf
Due by 10/10, 10:00 PM - Write: 2 page Double Space Response with annotations on week 3 readings for late sub
Due: by 10/14, 5:00 PM - Write: 1200 word discussion essay for English Conference, any topic relevant to class discussion.
By 10/14 - 5 page research outline/proposal for Arabia Imagined.
10/20 - Read/Annotate for Editing Assignment: Shakespeare, Hamlet Q1 1603 ASSIGNMENT Quarto and Folio versions of scene 2

Important/get done asap!

~~Not completed/due date passed~~

~~Completed/Done~~

updated Gender is changeable, Sex is not...well how about that?

2013-09-30T17:44:00.000-04:00

So tired...
How is this only week 4? I'm suppose to hit my stride around this time right?

Ok, work list for my own sanity:

9/24 - Be off book for: August: Osage County Scene
9/28 - ReRead/Annotate/Transcribe Notes: Judith Butler, Performative Acts and Gender Constitution, ¶'s 11-24
(5 pgs)

9/28 - ReRead/Annotate/Transcribe Notes: Aristophanes' Lysistrata
(7 pages)
9/28 - Read/Annotate: Text: al-Misri, (d. 1367) “Pilgrimage” (sharīʿa law book chapter) Trans. N. Keller, 1994. Reliance of the Traveler, 297-370.
(73 pgs)

9/28 - Read/Annotate: Malcolm X (with Alex Hayley), The Autobiography of Malcolm X. Ch. 17
(9 pgs)

9/28 - Read/Annotate: Hammoudi, Abdellah. 2006. “Narrative of a pilgrimage.” Trans. P. Ghazaleh. A Season in Mecca. Chs. 5 & 6, pp. 94-141.
(47 pgs)
Due 9/29, 10:00 PM - Write: 2 page Double Space Response with annotations on the above three reading assignments
Due 9/30 10:00 AM - Write: WESTERN THEATRE PAPER - 5-6 PAGES "Create a dialogue between Judith Butler's treatise on Performative Acts and Gender Constitution and Aristophanes' Lysistrata"
9/30 - Read/Annotate: The Tale of Sir Launcelot and Guinevere, pp. 403-467
(64 pgs)

9/30 - Read/Annotate: The Death of Arthur, pp. 468-527
(59 pgs)

9/30 - Read/Annotate: Explanatory Notes, pp. 556-565
(9 pgs)
10/1 - Read/Annotate: Foley, "Medea's Divided Self"
(24 pgs)
10/1 - Read/Annotate: Case, "Classic Drag"
(5 pages)
10/2 - Read/Annotate: Testament of Cresseid, pp. 2-47
(45 pgs)

Ok, maybe not so much sanity...but mental organization.
That's 141 pages to read/annotate by next Tommorow night folks...
Right.

Important/get done asap!

~~Not completed/due date passed~~

~~Completed/Done~~

http://www.gofundme.com/48ovzo

What a beautiful Sund....

2013-09-29T14:02:00.002-04:00

Writing my theatre paper.

Screen shot of the day: Trello

2013-09-14T14:18:00.003-04:00

So, I was introduced to the very useful (and very free) Trello online listing program, by my new boss Rudy, who uses it to organize the tasks for the office. I signed up with my own account and it has been great. Y'all know of my obsequious obsession with being able to visualize what needs to be done. This program is an amazing organizational tool for anyone with multiple projects with many steps and parts to get through. I highly recommend it!

Click to enlarge...the amazingness.

So yeah, https://trello.com . It's free to sign up. Enjoy.

PS. I ~~think I will~~ *UPDATE* did start (yet another) Tumblr blog about the where to get the best food for under $5 in Morningside....as a public service.

It's called:

Clicky Clicky...