Photozeal and a MAD girl...!!!!

The Arabian calling... Again

2016-04-22T13:36:00.002+05:30

Even Goa will start wailing if we did not make a yearly visit here, thanks to our fondness of this stunning place of beach shacks, the sandy breeze, the yellow sands (unlike the black sands of Maharashtra) and also offering booze at extremely affordable and economic price.

We had a long weekend coming up including Holi and Good Friday and of course Saturday and Sunday- a package of 4 days. We hadn't quite decided what will be our program for these 4 days, as I was in a pretty bad temper and we have our possession of our new flat coming up. So we were crunched financially (at least we endeavored to spend less and save the maximum amount of our meagre, invisible salaries and have succeeded in retaining a considerable amount of reserve still), and especially I was the one who is uncompromising when it comes to use the paltry reserve to any sort of extravagant expenditure. It is again I who is fond of traveling and exploring exotic, alien locales. So, off we went, embarking on a road trip to South Goa this time propelled by the exuberance of our "youth"- no we are not "that" young, everybody is on the other side of 30 except me...!!! Yaaayyy..!! ;) ;)

We commenced our journey at around 7 am on the day of Holi, aiming to reach Palolem by 8.30-9 pm, of course including the short recess for breakfast and lunch and responding to the calls of nature on the way. The heat was still endurable, the yellow ball of fire was playing hide and seek behind the greyish white fluffy stellar balls of cotton. We decided to take NH4 (obviously) but that one has quite a number of tolls which charge exorbitant amounts for no goddamn reason. The roads are not of premier caliber, the traffic is equally deplorable and road management is another ignominious facet of our country.

We parked our vehicle at A's friend's society and embarked on A's friend's Honda Brio- a compact yet adorable 4-wheeler of the bourgeoisie with superior mileage. As soon as we crossed Panvel and hit Mumbai-Pune Highway/Expressway, our stomachs felt the hunger twinges. Nonetheless, the Mumbai-Pune Expressway is a prodigious construction by the GOI, expediting the jaunt between Mumbai and Pune. This phenomenal piece of "architecture" exalts the caliber of the GOI, IF they sincerely adjudge the service to the common people as sacrosanct.

Mumbai Pune Expressway

But you are bound to get hell lot of traffic when you reach Lonavala or Khandala exit because-1. the truck/lorry drivers are gallant enough NOT to follow lane discipline and they are so preposterous that the cacophony of the indecorous honking behind them does not seem to castigate them already. This is such an idiosyncrasy of the truck drivers, all of them seem to enact this facetiously and in concord, 2. there are some abject, callous, obtuse sadists who perceive overtaking the already queued vehicles and barging onto the lane of the forth-coming vehicles is "sagacious" and will catalyze their "expedition" on the expressway.

So we propelled ahead on our own torpid pace and finally we could go past the imbecile truck drivers. Anyway, once again the needle could hit 120 km/hr on the speedometer and with our blithe fervor, we reached Pune within 2.5 hours, which would had taken 1.5/2 had we not encountered the debacle near Lonavala/Khandala. We had our lunch at a Maharashtrian dhaba, I was pretty surprised that the food was delectable, especially the chicken curry. Usually Maharashtrian dishes are unappetizing (I remember the insipid Malvani cuisine we had at Tarkarli- my tastebuds were tormented and crying out for salvation). More or less the cruise was pleasant, occasionally checking the Google Maps for directions. And finally the Goan breeze on our tired faces heralded that we have reached our destination- Palolem. We had made arrangements for lodging at Cupid's Castle right next to the Palolem beach for that night as they were charging too much for an air-conditioned room. We tried to parley with the reception guy there but he was adamant and an obtuse fellow, so we dropped the idea of wasting our time and took 2-a/c rooms. The rooms were comfortable enough and we were contented. We squandered no time and soon we were out on beach leaving our luggage in the rooms. The cool, pleasant Goan air felt so invigorating that all our exhaustion wore away.

Demise.

2016-02-03T14:04:00.002+05:30

Don’t misjudge the idiosyncratic subject of this post. It expatiates on the benign relationship which is the pith of the human existence. It didn’t involve any arduous endeavour to sustain for the past 1 year (totally a heuristic opinion). It's funny and doleful at the same time that perspectives change over a period of time, so do the preferences and we struggle to ignore the veritable and pragmatic facts, even if it is in appreciable amounts. One moment you are completely ensorcelled with the company, the consorts you are having but the next moment you are evicted from their cosmos without any caveat. Since Sunday, I have been completely frazzled and perturbed with the present turn of events, establishing the fact emphatically that the ingrained bourgeois-like candour and candidness is always belittled in today’s convoluted, whimsical world.

Just a year back when you thought that yes, in this land far away from the contentment of your home, you have got a parallel family in an inimical environment and when that becomes your habit, the time comes to refurbish your house again because the family is in a precarious position just because the young turks have crusaded against the facetious and cheapskates. The wretchedness of the chaotic cosmos has brought down the preposterous veneer while this broiling inferno has had an appalling effect on the very sacrosanct constitution of our existence. The unimpeachable, eudaimonic kinship started from 3 kinsfolk in its embryonic stage last year and augmented to 4 was now encumbering and causing disquietude to our preceptors. Our kindred had the flair for homologous subjects and each one of them was a pundit in their respective métier.

But for past few months, the steadfast apathy implicated from the same custodian of our cohesive, exemplar constitution, which we assiduously fortified from any external disingenuousness, coerced the fortress around to collapse. They didn’t want themselves to be discerned with the same young turks and these docile youth were left to adrift, left without the cardinal prudence amidst the obtuse populace.

Our journey

Poppet..!!

2015-09-13T01:08:00.000+05:30

This word amuses me whenever I hear its use/usage in the movie "Pirates of the Caribbean". Aahh the movie..!! This is quite a movie that I watch over and over and over again..!! Just for the heck of Cap’n Jack Sparrow aka Johnny Depp. He is just so damn handsome, more than Orlando Bloom. I don’t quite like Keira Knightley though. The movie speaks volumes about allegiance of everybody to one another- be it to Jack Sparrow or of Will Turner to his father or of Elizabeth Swann to Will Turner. Poor Will Turner acquiesced in whatever decision was taken upon by Lord Beckett or Elizabeth Swann’s father.

I feel sorry for Jack Sparrow whose first mate Barbossa mutinied against him, taking over the Black Pearl. The first day I sat down in front of the TV to watch the Pirates trilogy on Star movies- there was no looking back after that. It’s one of the movies very close to my heart, though didn’t quite like the 4^th movie too much. Didn't like the magician (Penelope Cruz's father), he looked very evil.

It's 1.20am and I am writing all rubbish. Ok I will be off to sleep now. Bubbye, will right again when I am in my senses again.

San Antonio

2014-10-28T06:21:00.001+05:30

Along San Antonio Riverwalk.

Riverwalk, San Antonio.

Tobin Centre, San Antonio

Along Riverwalk, San Antonio.

Him and her- V

2014-10-14T23:39:00.000+05:30

Probably remembering those days after such a long time just because I am not in a good mood (?) or maybe remembering those days make me...................miss those days so much.. (?)

Going on the same bus was one of the things which I looked forward to everyday. Everyday I secretly wished that my bus wouldn't come and then we would be going together. With me sitting beside Abhyudoy and he would turn red again... Aaahhh those days. We were innocent, not yet accustomed or learnt the twist and turns of life. Not yet faced the harsh reality of the world. We had numerous break ups in a span of 3 years. But those were the best days of my life. I will never forget them- even if I wanted to. I just cannot forget them. Those days are too precious to me.Way too precious. Then there was Sneha Sengupta who would call up on my neighbor's landline (as we didn't have a phone that time) and then she would complain like a jerk to my mother about me and Abhyudoy, thinking she was helping her friend Tree. And thus started the cold war/tension between me and my mother which, sadly, exists till this day. It ain't good if a mother has too much ego. A child can have ego but a parent is always forgiving (as far as I have seen the parents of my other friends/ seniors/ juniors etc).

But, my bad. It’s my life after all.

Probashe

2014-10-14T22:02:00.001+05:30

Solitude

Again after quite a hiatus. This time I am writing from the US. My second visit to foreign country after Malaysia. People say US is an evil country trying to rule the world. I don't care what this country is doing or not but surely it really cares for its people, its citizens. It works for them. The people here are way too broad minded ( if only the people back in my country were 0.1% broad minded as the people here...!!!)

মাঝে মাঝে খুব মন খারাপ করে , বাড়ি যাবার জন্য নয় , এখানে প্রচুর অন্য মানুষ দের দেখে। সোমবার থেকে শুক্রবার খুব খাটে , শুক্রবার half day নেয়। এদের কে দেখে খুব হিংসে হয় আমার। সবাই নিজের নিজের জীবনে কত খুশি।খুব importance দেয় এরা family life কে। কি সুন্দর ছুটির দিনে সবাই একসাথে মিলেমিশে ঘুরতে বেরয়।কিছু কিছু লোক এত gentlemanly behave করে ভাবি এরকম যদি কারোর সাথে আগে আলাপ হত।

Blank

2014-04-29T15:43:00.001+05:30

They say “marriages are made in heaven”. Indeed. For some homo sapiens, except mine. Hahahaha. Funny it may/does sound. Sometimes I think yes I have rushed into some decisions and some I have taken at the wrong time instead of the appropriate time. This world is far far different than the one I used to gleefully imagine as a child (growing up in the 90’s has made me an emotional retard, but my friends have adjusted and moved along with the pace whereas I have fallen behind). And the people living in this world are nowhere even remotely near to those shown in movies. Aaahhh these movies, these movies ruin you. You start each and everything that are shown in the movies and then you try to c0relate them with your real life. & bang..!!! You are jolted out of your day/night dreams. “I won’t harm the lion doesn’t mean the lion won’t harm me”- this was my motto in life. Not was, it still is. Period.

It’s just I am used to living my life alone and independently throughout. With ZERO interference from anybody (yes except my mom of course). Should have given some time to myself, my needs, my desires, my dreams. Throughout my life I have lived it just for others. First it was my mom and now………… I don’t have time for myself, my dreams, my needs, my desires, my holidays.

Shouldn’t have done it so early. Shouldn’t.

Fish out water?

2014-04-23T13:02:00.002+05:30

& again I am back with my bout of mood swings and my ability to relish unhappiness. ( মনে হয় আমি আস্তে আস্তে অসুস্থ্য উঠছি ). জানিনা ৩ বছরের মাথায় মানুষ কিরকম করে এতটাও পারে। ওর সাথে করা পুরনো chat পড়তে খুব ভালোলাগে। কিন্তু আজ যখন ওর সাথে করা সেই পুরনো chat গুলো পড়ছিলাম হঠাত্ত মনে হলো ও যেন কথাও হারিয়ে গেছে। "Lost in the translation of time", maybe. Or জানিনা কি কি বদলে গেছে। Office-এ কাজে মন লাগছিলনা তাই অনেকদিন পর আমার blog টা খুল্লাম। কিছু লিখতে ইচ্ছে হলো। অনেকদিন ধরেই মনের ভেতরের এই কথাগুলো ঘুরপাক খাচ্ছিল কিন্তু লেখার সময় খুঁজে পাচ্ছিলামনা। আজ office-এ লেখার একটু সময় পেলাম তাই লিখে ফেল্লাম। পুরনো chat গুলো পড়ে চোখ থেকে ১ ফোটা জল পড়ল আমার ডেস্কে।

কেন আলাপ হলো ওর সাথে আমার ?? না হলেই তো ভালো হতো। নিজের পরিস্থিতি আমি নিজে সামলে নিতে পারতাম তখন। পারতাম।

Payback

2013-12-04T21:26:00.000+05:30

Sometimes I wonder as to what grave mistakes I had done in my past life so as to my curent life being so very fucked up. Did I murder anyone? Did I cheat on anyone? Dupe anyone? What exactly did I do?

Regretting as to why I didn't appear for GSI exam inspite of the centre being just 5 minutes walking distance away from my home. Aahhh I remember- "he" was to come to my house that day for the 1st time. Appearing for CIL campussing- one of the worst regrettable decisions in my life topping the list. & choosing RI 4 is just the icing on the cake. Had started believing in the most controversial character of the world-"GOD" but fortunately present turn of events helped me backtrack myself. There's nothing called GOD. All are plain & simple BS. This place has sucked all enjoyment, my life from my life. Never before have I sincerely wanted not to be a part of this world as I do today...

Sigh. If only my wish came true

BS

2013-12-04T01:35:00.001+05:30

Needed someone/something to puke out the things that are the reason for my indigestion right now. Since I have a scarcity of "someone" in my life, took refuge in "something" and here I am, writing BS in my blog, at 01.30 hrs whereas I should be sound asleep now in order to wake up in time & attend office. Aaahhh now from the word office I remember that shittiest place in the world about which I used to dream of while in school-"kobe chakri korbo nije taka kamabo". A**hole. That adjective I used for me. Yes me. Took a few bad decisions in life- for which I have to regret throughout my goddamn God(if He exists)-forsaken f***ed up life.

& oh yes, I will never forgive you for what you said to me today. You just proved what position I hold in your life-for the second time.. Thanx.

Silence

2013-05-10T00:02:00.000+05:30

It’s been quite some time that I penned down my thoughts on my blog. Not in a very good mood- feeling lonely, frustrated, pissed, dissatisfied, helpless… Getting a job and supporting my family, taking their responsibility on my shoulders was my prime aim in life after completion of studies. Later some additions like saving money to buy a flat together with my husband got added to the list. Thus to keep fulfilling the list of “aims” I have to do my part of sacrificing my desires (like buying a really nice dress, eating dinner out in a good restaurant, buying a bed as I am still sleeping on a mattress laid on the floor, buying a bigger and better TV but could only buy a medium sized one etc etc).

It really hurts when those same people for whom you are doing your part to keep them happy fail to understand you. They fail to understand living at the top floor at 49° C is a very hard thing to do, going out to the market just to buy grocery and vegetables and then returning home just to fall ill and weak but not saying a word to anybody for the fear of being branded a “forever complaining girl” is just a part of those “aims”. Living far away from your husband even after marriage - just not done. Then what’s the point of getting married if you are just unable to live together? Talking over the phone just for 5-10 minutes out of 24 hours in a day- it hurts. It seriously hurts. In spite of the depressing environment at workplace which is bound to make you a mentally sick and disabled, you just cannot think of resigning just because of the “aims”.

Yes I know I am immature. I am impulsive, I’ve got a “don’t-care-a-damn” attitude, but sometimes I do care and need someone to care for me too…………

Photography

2012-11-17T23:43:00.000+05:30

Lighting up my life

Source of strength

Festival of lights...

Ganpati Bappa

Inhibitions

2012-11-17T20:13:00.002+05:30

There are things which I wanna do, things which I don’t wanna do… Without anyone shouting out the restrictions/inhibitions to me… But alas, I am now “married”, “working woman”, “into a professional world” and blah blah… Few days back I got a forwarded mail whose synopsis was “don’t think, but do whatever you want to do. Many people spend their life in thinking whether they should actually do it and waiting for someone else to do the thing for them or offering them the apt situation”.

I cannot/don’t think and do. I don’t care what the world thinks of me, it’s my life. I have the full right to live it my way. I don’t do things thinking what the consequences maybe, I just want to enjoy my life without any inhibitions and restrictions and limitations holding me back. Just as it is shown in the movies. I want you to be with me no matter what I do, shield me, enjoy with me, comfort me when I am down. But maybe I am asking too much of you.

Sigh.

Two and a half....

2012-10-21T16:33:00.000+05:30

It's been two and a half months since I came to this second largest city of Maharashtra (as everyone says!!! Though I have my doubts between Pune and Nagpur), and I have realised one very important "characteristic" of this city and that is-"Nagpur is a culturally DEAD city.." Period. Though it is a f***ingly RICH city with 3 duplex bungalow type houses out of 6 at every street, road, lane, bylanes, people here are more fashion conscious than being health conscious. People here prefer investing in properties, rather than buying good food, enjoying their lives. Even the clerical staff of my office are millionaires and billionaires, yet in appearance they are worse than the people who have roadside hotels selling "sobji bhaat for 12 INR" and "dim bhaat for 15 INR" and "mangsho bhaat for 25 INR" in Kolkata....!!!!!

For two and a half months I have searched for a dance class/tutorial so that I can resume my Kathak lessons. For two and a half months I have searched for a guitar class/tutorial so that I resume my guitar lessons. But alas...!!! Nagpur is a culturally DEAD city.."

Here younsgters (school going guys and girls, college going youth) prefer roaming around the streets of Nagpur on their Scooties showing of their "driving skills & maneuvers (which are nothing but "rash driving" leading to innumerous accidents), going to Futala Lake and what-was-the-name-I-forgot Lake AFTER sunset (friends, I think you can VERY well understand what I mean/meant to say..!!)

Never knew I will MISS Kolkata, my hometown, the "Tilottama" to this extent. It's true that as long as you have the thing, you never realise its worth. When the thing is no more with you then you realise what you are lacking.....!!!!

Love you forever and beyond Kolkata......

Dubious "sanity"...

2012-10-19T20:57:00.000+05:30

Was listening to 25 minutes by MLTR and again was thinking and having a flashback of all sorts… I have a serious problem.. Whenever I listen to songs of this sort, I start having flashbacks and get depressed for no reason… Living alone is a very uphill task. You start thinking all weird things and even the minute”est” details, quarrels come flooding in your mind. & then you have mood off for the rest of the day, week or even month….!!!!

This is again that time of the year when I was supposed to go to Kolkata but unfortunately I am at Nagpur. What “great” idea dawned upon me I don’t know (I’m still dubious about my sanity..!!!) that instead of getting meself a ticket to Kolkata I was adamant about going to Mumbai, that too during Durga Puja…!!!! Feel like kicking myself…!!!! I’m getting more and more jealous reading all the “wonderful”, “lavish” FB statuses about Durga puja, how they are pandal hopping, how they are going to have dinner at “that” restaurant, when they will be meeting at “that” particular place and all “bullshit” (to me for the time being…!!!)

I promise to myself that this is the 1^st ever and LAST ever when I am missing Durga Puja, the festival which defines my ETHNICITY, my CULTURE, my BONGNESS…

LAST TIME EVER…..

Changes and Me....!!!

2012-10-14T01:14:00.000+05:30

Why do “people” expect/ask you to change when they don’t have the guts to accept the change? You asked me to change, I am changing myself for you. Now you say you don’t like it. Don’t ever expect me to be my usual self with you again when you don’t like it. It’s tough to bring the changes and get accustomed to it yourself but it’s easy for one to say “change these things” to someone else. You liked me the way I am, I was and you yourself asking me to change..!! What if you liking change too? What if you don’t like me anymore citing the reason “you have changed, I liked you not for this but for that…!!!”

My rantings….!!!!

Blank blank blank....!!!

2012-09-23T01:38:00.002+05:30

Blogging is a good thing. Good thing because it keeps you occupied. & for a girl/lady/woman (??) like me, it is best to remain occupied. As some people say/recommend. For me blogging is simply writing into a virtual journal/diary.. Often I wish to share my erratic posts with “my” readers (do I have any??? LOL..) but then again I realize that my blog is nothing except a private/virtual diary for me into which I make some entries, intelligent/worth reading/bogus or whatever adjective you want to categorize it into… ;) ;) ;) I have absolutely no qualms about it.. Of late, I have become very lazy, some happening things have happened in my life.. Some things I wish shouldn’t have happened, some I realize I have hastened in my “decision taking” power (if I have any...!!!) , some…… (let’s not talk about it…!!!!)

It’s 01.32 am and my eyes are drooling and yet here I am writing utter nonsense just for the sake of filling up my blog…!!!

Ciao…!!! ;) ;)

Good night and don’t let my stupidity get the better of you… ;) ;)

Every rose has its thorn...

2012-03-16T19:42:00.003+05:30

Reflection..

2012-03-16T19:37:00.000+05:30

Bright

2012-03-16T19:31:00.000+05:30

Emptiness..

2012-03-16T19:30:00.001+05:30

A rainy day it was...

2012-03-16T19:28:00.000+05:30

Sunset at Fatehsagar Lake....

2012-03-16T02:29:00.000+05:30

Waves....

2012-03-16T02:28:00.000+05:30

Peeping

2012-03-16T02:19:00.000+05:30