Your Freedom Coach

Diving into Anger

2013-06-08T12:34:00.001-07:00

Anger is about being wronged, sometimes badly wronged.

Holding onto it, from the past, defines your present.

Anger can show up in a reaction, helping us protect ourselves from the feelings of grief, arising out of a loss or disappointment.

Writing:

What is the object of your anger?

Who are you angry at? Yourself or someone else?

Thinking about what you just wrote, could the underlying cause of the anger be related to fear? If you can name a fear, write it down.

Thinking about the same subject, gently go deeper into the anger to see if you are feeling sorrow or loss. What is it that you have lost, or never had, that has created a wound or a sorrow? Write it down.

If fear, loss or sorrow were absent, would there be a need for the mind to protect us with anger?
What act of courage might help you to let go of your anger to heal?

Can you begin to feel more space... where perhaps hope and trust awaken?

Are there things that you are mad at, or can’t accept or change?

Write down what you can’t accept.

Write down what circumstance is unacceptable to you.

What bad things have happened because of it?

Write down at least 3 good things or successes that has occurred because of this unacceptable event.

Look at our participation in a circumstance and how we give our power away.

How we relate to our self can stimulate a healthy action or a stressful reaction.

As you pay attention to and begin to acknowledge the good that came from what you are angry about or what was unacceptable to you in the past, you will feel forgiveness rising. This is the way you can move with anger, so you own it instead of it owning you.

Anger is an ally. What must be protected? What must be restored? Karla Mclaren

Human Beings... What and Who

2013-05-14T09:45:00.004-07:00

Why are we called Human Beings?
When What integrates with Who, anything is possible

Learn more about Human Beings in Life Creations Education "Balance" Teleconference

WHO-WHAT SUTRA Follows

SELF IS WHO

EXPRESSION IS WHAT

SELF IS PRODUCER OF REALITY

EXPRESSION IS PRODUCTION OF SELF

NOTHING IS SELF ORIGINATED

EVERYTHING IS ORIGINATED, SUSTAINED, COMPLETED AND DISAPPEARED IN WHO

WHO SUSTAINS, WHAT IS SUSTAINED

WHO SOURCES, WHAT IS SOURCED

WHO ABSORBS, WHAT DISAPPEARS

WHO IS THE SPACE IN WHICH WHAT APPEARS

WHO REMAINS FREE, WHAT CHANGES, APPEARS AND DISAPPEARS

WHO IS THE HOST, WHAT IS THE GUEST

WHO IS, WHAT APPEARS TO BE

WITHOUT WHAT, WHO IS

WITHOUT WHO, NOTHING IS

WHAT HAS BEGINNING, SO WHAT ENDS

WHO IS BEGINNINGLESS, SO WHO NEVER ENDS

WHO PERCEIVES, WHAT DOESN’T

WHO SUSTAINS WHAT BY WHO’S PERCEIVING

WHAT BY ITSELF DISAPPEARS

WHO CARES, WHAT DOESN’T

WHAT MATTERS, WHO DOESN’T

WHAT IS SIGNIFICANT, WHO GRANTS SIGNIFICANCE

WHAT MEANS, WHO LAUGHS

WHAT IS ENJOYED, WHO ENJOYS

WHAT WORKS, WHO PLAY.

WHAT WORKS WITHIN WHO’S PLAYING

OUTSIDE OF WHO’S PLAYING, NOTHING WORKS

WHAT IS WHO’S FIELD OF PLAY

WHO IS WHAT’S PLAYER, WHAT IS PLAYED BY WHO

WHO EXPRESSES THROUGH WHAT, WHAT IS WHO’S EXPRESSION

NOTHING IS WHO’S SILENCE

WHAT AND NOTHING ARE THE TWO CORNERS OF WHO’S SMILE

FOR WHO, THESE TWO, ARE THE SAME

WHEN WHO IS IDENTIFIED WITH WHAT, SERIOUSNESS AND SUFFERING ARISE

AS A CHANGING WHAT TRYING TO GRAB A “STABLE” CHANGING WHAT

EVEN CHANGE IS CHANGING

WHEN WHO IS IDENTIFIED WITH NOTHING, HUMOR AND FREEDOM ARISE AS SO MUCH LOOSE CHANGE.

WHAT CHANGES, WHO DOESN’T

WHAT HAS PROBLEMS,

NOTHING DOESN’T HAVE PROBLEMS, WHO HAS PROBLEM AND NO-PROBLEM

WHO HOLDS BOTH THE SAME WAY

YOU AS WHO IS RELATION BEYOND ALL THINGS AND NOWHERE

YOU AS WHAT IS AT EFFECT OF WHAT ELSE EVERYWHERE

WHAT YOU ARE IS BIRTH AND DEATH WITHOUT END

WHO YOU ARE IS BEYOND ALL LIMITATION

WHAT YOU ARE AGONIZES ITS EVER-CEASING TO BE

WHO YOU ARE, JOYFULLY PLAYS IN WHAT’S EVER-BECOMING

WHEN WHAT’S EVER-BECOMING CANCELS WHAT’S EVER-CEASING,WHO SMILES

WHAT MATTERS TO WHO

WHO DOESN’T MATTER TO WHAT

WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH WHO

WITHOUT WHO, WHAT DOESN’T MATTER

WITHOUT WHAT, WHO IS THE SAME

WITH WHAT, WHO IS THE SAME AND DIFFERENT

IN WHAT, THE SAME IS DIFFERENCE

IN WHO, THE DIFFERENCES ARE THE SAME

WHAT IS ONE, OR ISN’T

WHO IS ONE, MANY AND ISN’T

WHAT IS HE, SHE, IT, THEM

WHO IS YOU, WE, US

WHO EXPRESSES WHAT AND KNOWS IT

WHAT IS EXPRESSED AND KNOWS NOT

TOGETHER WE ARE, SEPARATE WE CAN BE

I AM WHO WE ARE, WE ARE WHO I AM

WE ARE WHO WE ARE, I AM WHO I AM

WHAT STANDS BETWEEN US

WHO KNOWS, WHAT DOESN’T

KNOWING THAT, WE HOLD NO BETWEEN

ALL THERE IS, IS IS!

Written by Lar Short founder of Grace Essence Fellowship

Speaking Truth and Responsibility

2013-04-11T17:20:00.001-07:00

“Learn to withstand criticism. Lean into it. It’s the cost of speaking your mind.

Take responsibility and quickly move on.” Adrianna Huffington

People tend to back away from the truth, wanting to protect themselves!

I contract my services at a local organization. I received a call from a manager letting me know that in taking a certain action, I had unknowingly violated my contract and set her up for liability. My immediate inside reaction was how could this be? It had to do with a third party and seemed clean to me. I listened with half a mind, observing the other half fighting and resisting the information.
I said, “Ok, no worries.”

At the same time, she was new at dispensing delicate information and had always treated me with genuine good heartedness. I found myself praising her for taking on this new leadership role even though I was the one whose hand was being metaphorically slapped.

Within 5 minutes, I sent off a quick email, thanking her for letting me know, owning what had transpired, understanding her perspective and reassuring her, “Really, no worries, I will protect you and all managers from being put into this position in the future”.

We were working as a team. She thanked me right back for being able to “hear it”.

Here is the agreement I’ve made with fellow team members, friends and family.

A commitment from people I trust to improve communication and give me feedback, suggestions and to speak openly about any weaknesses or mis-takes.

Agreeing with Lean In and Sheryl Sandberg, “that the upside of painful knowledge is so much greater than the downside of blissful ignorance”.

What am I doing that I don’t see?

What am I not doing that I don’t see?

How can I be better at what I do?

In becoming accountable, we further our commitment to leadership.

Is there anywhere you find yourself backing away or avoiding, that you could own by speaking some words? What is stopping you from taking responsibility?

The Gift in "I Don't Know"

2013-03-14T15:56:00.000-07:00

Coaching invites you to open things up.

It’s been said: Fear is a bigger motivator then purpose and when the pain is greater than the fear we act.

Are you more motivated by your dreams or fears?

Coaching questions invite you to explore your obstacles and aim for breakthrough results.

Through questions we:

Get friendly with habit formation and core values

Create transforming new behaviors resulting in self-leadership

Tap into assets

Partner in success

Do you hold a high-level leadership position and feel in-over your head?

Do you know where that comes from?

In my own personal coaching journey, my most frequent answer to any coaching question began with this shrug of the shoulders answer. We don’t know how much we do or don’t know about our self until we start asking. Or until we commit to being asked…

How does I Don’t Know influence our mind?

The mind can use I don’t know to ease our self into the background of our own life.

I don’t know, I just don’t know. Can’t get there. No idea, I just don’t know can be an avoidance behavior. We disappear, disconnect and avoid to resist opening ourselves up.

What’s missing here?

Next time this happens to you, wake up to I Don’t Know and use it as a bridge that will take you to what you do know. Being aware of these three little words throughout your week and then questioning what you do know, will give you an opportunity to explore and move beyond this place and time.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself when you are in I Don’t Know territory.

What comes to mind?

What does that tell you?

What do you get from that?

One client calls coaching Transformational Modeling

What is Coaching?

2013-01-14T17:56:00.001-08:00

It’s a thought provoking creative process that inspires personal and professional transformation! All LCE coaches live by what they love to teach and love to teach

what they live by!

What's the difference between therapy and coaching?

Coaching examines your thoughts, feelings and behaviors, challenging you to create new behaviors. Coaching provides you with tools and strategies to help you accomplish desired shifts in thinking and behaving. It helps you respond and take action rather than reacting in old patterns of protection. Compulsive thinking and emotional reactions can impede work effectiveness. Cognitive and emotional reactions can interfere with personal performance and well being.

Coaches are trained mentors focusing in on:

Where you are in the present, looking to a better future and moving forward to that intention.

Connecting you to your own core values and using this foundation while designing your life

Acknowledging how you relate to yourself and feelings as they arise

Replacement of sabotaging patterns and behaviors

Inspiration, Insights and new perspectives
Possibilities and potential

Creative collaboration in an equal partnership with support in between calls

Coaching sessions tend to last longer and are spaced at longer intervals

Coaches suggest homework. This allows time and practice for integration of new concepts

Accountability support encourages clients to uncover their own unique solutions

Partnering with a coach turns challenges and obstacles into successes and victories

Questions are active: Coaches listen and ask question after question to deepen awareness

Growth is rapid and enjoyable!

Coaches can refer to therapists

A journey of personal evolution, self exploration, personal effectiveness and increased awareness

Accept a complimentary call with a Life Creations Education coach today.
Explore and free yourself

Tears Will Get You to the Truth

2012-11-06T19:09:00.003-08:00

Tears Will Get You to the Truth

I recorded the life story of an 85 year old African American woman, who was born into slavery on a Louisiana plantation. Her family was “owned and ruled by the master”. After a horrendous childhood, you would have thought only existed in a war torn country, she grew and married. The couple, wanting a better life, joined the 1942 westward migration, hoping for war-time work. They settled in Marin City and were bused across the Golden Gate Bridge to the Presidio. Day in and day out, he diligently unloaded the flag draped caskets and she unemotionally dressed the bodies for burial.

How did you survive?

“Faith and Tears will get you to the truth, baby.

The good lord would not have given us tear ducts, if they didn’t help us get on.”

Scientists agree, believing tears may be involved in eliminating toxic substances from the body and are curative, helping us cope with pain, stress and loss. Helping us release into joy!

Tears appear at the end of an episode of Over-Haulin, when the unimaginable happens & hope is born.

Tears support us in the middle of change.

Tears are present at the most meaningful times in our life.

Tears deepen and change us. Revelations come and space is created within.

Tears give us a new start.

Tears leave us breathless, vulnerable and kind.

Tears remind us we have lost something precious.

Tears connect us to beauty, honesty and intimacy.

Tears open us to trusting, forgiveness, acceptance and surrender.

Tears are music to a voiceless heart and release us from pain.

Tears are a reminder we will never be the same.

Tears bring us balance and well being.

Tears help us take responsibility for harm given or received.

Tears take us into a gap and give us pause.

Tears help us face our patterns and limitations.

Tears awaken us to our beliefs and purpose.

Tears help us loose weight.

Tears allow us to speak our truth.

Tears connect us to all of humanity, for we all weep.

Tears connect us to our Source, the I AM or sacred.

Tears are back stage for a new thought, feeling or action.

Like an underground subway, tears connect us to the sub personalities. They move us forward.

Tears are a bridge from the past to the present, where we face our fears, become lighter and free.

Tears help us emotionally recover ourselves.

Coaches ride the waves of healing tears along with their clients, listening and allowing for the depths of break through and transformation. Tears will get you beyond the story to what’s true.

Tears will get you to the truth, baby!

7week telesummit

2012-10-04T17:48:00.002-07:00

Seven successful and passionate life coaches will give you the secrets to:

Are you always feeling like you never have enough time to accomplish everything you need to in one day? Learn steps to your everyday routine that will create freedom for YOU! You will learn tools that will help you make deadlines with ease and ways to fits everything in your busy schedule. When you understand the behaviors or actions that maybe stopping you to getting it all done or even getting started with a task, it will create new beginnings. "How we do anything is how we do everything.

"How to Achieve Maximum

Productivity While Gaining Sanity & Balance with Marc Tolliver October 11^th Are you wanting to take your life and career to the next level but just don't know how? When you're building your life and career, the biggest challenge can be knowing what to do and how to do it while still having a life. In this course you will learn:

What success means and what it looks like in you career and life;
How to attain the vision that you have wanted to achieve financially;
The steps to take in order to develop your dream into reality; and
How to have balance while creating more productivity with a greater sense of fulfillment.

You will walk away with tangible tools to support your growth, these secrets are the very ones that have allowed me to master my career, and have a life that I love.

How to Break Free from Overthinking with Elaine Cleland, October 18^th Within this course, I will share with you my own journey through years of overthinking and finding ways to disconnect or “zone out” to ease the pain – only to find myself suffering severe pain, exhaustion, financial hardship, loneliness, and hopelessness. I'm now able to experience peace of mind, physical health, and a connection to myself that is allowing a new level of prosperity in my life, and I'm ready to share the steps to getting there with you. It is my passion and commitment to support you on your journey from where you are today to where you truly want to be.

How to Relieve the Stress that is Killing Your Motivation & Discipline to Live Healthy and Happy with Theresa Meyer, October 25^th Stress is an epidemic in the western world and is the cause of over 80% of all illness and disease. There are a lot of books, articles, and advice on how to relieve stress but just thinking about having to read and implement the steps into our hectic lives can seem stressful. If you are experiencing so much stress in your life that you don’t even have the energy or motivation to do the things you need and want to do. And because you AREN’T getting those things done, it causes you MORE stress; you need to be on this call.

Get to the root cause of your stress by looking at what is REALLY stressing you out (and it’s probably not what you think it is).
Uncover the ways you are dealing with stress that may be killing you and your dreams.
How to alleviate your stress right as it is happening which will allow you to keep moving towards your goals and dreams.

What’s Your Story and the Reality Behind It? with Shelley White, November 1^st What is it that shapes each one of our stories, and who is the author that creates the characters and the scenes we find ourselves living? Within this class, we will examine what role you play in life, how it keeps you from truly living, and how your own personalities are limiting your relationships. We'll unearth the real you, and teach you how to reconnect with yourself and others.

How to Find Your Purpose (Even When You Don't Have a Clue)! with Audrey Jones November 8^th Do you ever wonder what it would FEEL like to live a purposeful life rather than working for a living and collecting a paycheck? Would you like to know what your purpose is, and how you go about pursuing it? We will also discuss the distinction between “Purpose” and “Divine Purpose”. You'll walk away from this call with a powerful new lease on life and a path to your Divine Purpose.

Why you suffer from feeling completely empty and unfulfilled.
Why your purpose feels so elusive.
Where to look even when you don’t know where to start.
Why not having a passion or purpose is keeping you stuck.

Equanimity: Seeking Center and Reclaiming Balance with Janelle Macrae, November 15^th Balancing work, family, community, and self is a challenge for many of us. We are now being called and stretched in numerous and previously unheard of ways. Without balance we don’t have the energy, focus, or strength to attend to all the roles we find ourselves playing.

What causes imbalance in life and what it is creating?
How excessive boundaries keep us stuck and what to do to break free.
How creating time for me creates better and healthier relationships with others.
Some easy steps to create balance and cause transformation.

The Compassionate Brain: Free Streaming Video Series

2012-09-12T16:08:00.003-07:00

http://live.soundstrue.com/compassionatebrain/event.php

Compassionate Brain Highlights

Session 1: How the Mind Changes the Brain

Session Highlights:

An in-depth conversation with Dr. Richie Davidson, professor of psychology at the University of Wisconsin and co-editor of The Asymmetrical Brain
How your thoughts and feelings change your brain’s structure
Studies on compassion in contemplatives

Live session with Dr. Rick Hanson and Dr. Richie Davidson

Live session: 1 hour
Session will take place Monday, October 8, 2012, from
8–9 pm Eastern Time (GMT –4)

Join

Session 2: Mindfulness of Oneself and Others

Session Highlights:

An in-depth conversation with Dr. Daniel Siegel, executive director of the Mindsight Institute and author of Mindsight: The New Science of Personal Transformation
The link between empathy for yourself and empathy for others
Compassion in family life
Compassion in clinical practice

Live session with Dr. Rick Hanson and Dr. Daniel Siegel

Live session: 1 hour
Session will take place Monday, October 15, 2012, from
8–9 pm Eastern Time (GMT –4)

Join

Session 3: Cultivating a Forgiving Heart

Session Highlights:

An in-depth conversation with Dr. Tara Brach, founder of the Insight Meditation Community of Washington and author of Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life with the Heart of a Buddha
Practices for strengthening and expressing compassion and kindness
Dealing with hard issues in relationships

Live session with Dr. Rick Hanson and Dr. Tara Brach

Live session: 1 hour
Session will take place Monday, October 22, 2012, from
8–9 pm Eastern Time (GMT –4)

Join

Session 4: The Evolution of Compassion: From Gene to Meme

Session Highlights:

An in-depth conversation with Dr. Dacher Keltner, professor of psychology at the University of California, Berkeley and author of Born to Be Good: The Science of a Meaningful Life
The ways we are sociable primates
The universals of compassion across cultures

Live session with Dr. Rick Hanson and Dr. Dacher Keltner

Live session: 1 hour
Session will take place Monday, October 29, 2012, from
8–9 pm Eastern Time (GMT –4)

Join

Session 5: Balancing Compassion and Assertiveness

Session Highlights:

An in-depth conversation with Dr. Kelly McGonigal, senior teacher and consultant for the Stanford Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education and author of The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It
Compassion for oneself and others in pain
Bringing willpower to compassion
Balancing compassion and assertiveness

Live session with Dr. Rick Hanson and Dr. Kelly McGonigal

Live session: 1 hour
Session will take place Monday, November 5, 2012, from
8–9 pm Eastern Time (GMT –5)

Join

Session 6: The Power of Self-Compassion

Session Highlights:

An in-depth conversation with Dr. Kristin Neff, professor of human development and culture at the University of Texas, Austin and author of Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind
How to cultivate self-compassion
Compassion for those with special needs

Live session with Dr. Rick Hanson and Dr. Kristin Neff

Live session: 1 hour
Session will take place Monday, November 12, 2012, from
8–9 pm Eastern Time (GMT –5)

Join

Session 7: Compassion in the Wider World

Session Highlights:

An in-depth conversation with Dr. Jean Houston, co-founder of The Foundation for Mind Research and author of The Possible Human: A Course in Enhancing Your Physical, Mental, and Creative Abilities
Opening one’s heart wide without becoming overwhelmed
Ways to find your own way to contribute

Live session with Dr. Rick Hanson and Dr. Jean Houston

Live session: 1 hour
Session will take place Monday, November 19, 2012, from
8–9 pm Eastern Time (GMT –5)

Heart of Compassion

2012-09-12T15:09:00.003-07:00

Are you aware when you get stuck in thoughts and feelings?

Is there a way you can develop compassion for yourself, in these moments, as the path away from struggling and suffering, awakening to what’s alive and purposeful in you?

What is compassion?

Dictionary definition of compassion is: a wish to alleviate the pain and suffering of oneself, others and the world. Recognizing someone else's suffering is like our own and wanting to do something about it.

A quote from the Dalai Lama: “Deep awareness of the suffering of another without the need to relieve it, feeling total appreciation of its value and state of non-judgment.” It can be a broad approach in life and can color all that we do in the world.

In Opening the Heart of Compassion. “Compassion does not mean pity or sympathy for the sufferings of others, nor does it mean feeling their suffering as our own. When we have compassion, we care for other people with the heartfelt desire to bring about their happiness by freeing them from their own suffering. We this openly when we have worked through out illusions and fixations in a way that the essential nature and energy of aliveness is freed from the constrictions of our habits.”

What can we do as compassionate beings for one another? First free yourself by...

finding what speaks to you, helps you relax and gives you space where you can begin to observe your thoughts and feelings. The mind keeps us actively obscured in the muck of the past and wanting of the future. When you are aware of the “fixations” and stories your mind retells, then you can begin to free yourself.

What am I thinking now?

What am I feeling? (Start writing)

How am I acting? (State your behavior actions or reactions)

What happens when your gas tank is empty? You can push the car up the road and exhaust yourself or you can take action and Pause in your day while you wait for the tow truck.

Second, after finding what speaks to you and says Yes in you, then begin to apply it, to break up your mental and emotional routines. One way of doing this is by training the mind to serve the moment. There are many forms of meditation.

In this exercise, we spread radiant energy by shifting our attention from one part of the body to another, creating a flow or sensation in the body. At the same time, we also get in touch with our intentions for our meditation practice, or our “aim”. Our aim gives our efforts a direction and connects us to our intentions and the present moment. Proceed when you have a clear “aim” you want to work with, within this meditation.

1) Begin the meditation by placing your attention on your palm or your breath, letting your body and mind ease into the process until you feel relaxed and alert. Now move your attention to the Heart Center.

2) In the heart Center feel your desire, during this very meditation, to become free in the immediate moment… NOW, building the stamina to abide in the state of poise and grace for the benefit of self and others. Get in touch with any additional aims you have for your practice, feeling the intensity of your intention.

3) Invite the name of Being (the Divine, your teacher, supportive forces, your ancestors, nature) and the unknown into your Heart Center, feeling the increasing radiance of their presence.

4) Spread the radiance from your Heart Center throughout your body like an inner smile. This is sunbathing from the inside out, with your radiant aim residing like the sun in your heart.

a) Beginning with your forehead and the top of your head, feel the sensation of the radiant aim energy flowing throughout your upper head and each area of your brain.

b) Spread the radiant aim energy to the outer edges of your eyes.

c) Continue to spread the aim energy into your nose, through your cheeks and out your ears.

d) Spread the radiant aim energy to your tongue, mouth and jaw.

e) Then to your throat, neck and chest, including your thymus glands and your lungs.

f) Fill you liver, adrenals, kidneys with radiant aim energy.

g) Spread the radiant aim energy into all of the organs in the abdominal area including the stomach, intestines, spleen, pancreas and sexual organs.

h) Spread the radiant aim energy to your entire body so that your whole body is feeling and radiating the inner smile- every organ, every muscle, every bone, every nerve and every cell.

How differently do you feel?

We become less constricted and attached in old patterns, become more relaxed and allow a positive compassionate relationship with ourselves to begin and continue... When we relate to ourselves and the world more directly we discover more of its radiance and riches.

INNER SMILE from the Heart Center: Lar Short, Grace Essence Fellowship

Opening the Heart of Compassion: Transform Suffering through Buddhist Psychology and Practice,
Martin Lowenthal and Lar Short

WHO is a Successful Human Being!

2012-08-06T16:49:00.001-07:00

What does success mean to you? Attached to or stuck in a definition of success related to individual performance or achievements?

Where have our ideas about success come from?

Our parents and our culture usually determine what our values of success are. People spend their entire life chasing after another persons concept of success and at the end of their life, discover they missed living their own. Determining what your idea of success is and aligning with it, is a success.

When you are identified by your accomplishments, what does this necessitate? Pushing hard, trying harder, acquiring more, fighting for, living within a perspective of gain and loss, multitasking, faking it until you make it, living in the past or future unaware of the moment acquiring rewards needed to get that respectable position in the social hierarchy we crave.

You begin to live your life in WHAT (human) instead of WHO (Being).

Freedom comes when we choose to identify with success in a new way, not related to accomplishments, rewards, achievements and WHAT.

Is there a success that you can think of that doesn’t connect to a goal or accomplishment?
How can you connect to a feeling of success in a different way?

If you could look at success as more then an accomplishment, and shift your perception, what would it give you a sense of?

“Favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors"

“Vigorous growth and development such as results from natural vitality."

A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him. David Brinkley

I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
Bill Cosby

Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.
Albert Einstein

Feelings to Emotions, Vocabulary List

2012-06-11T14:04:00.002-07:00

What is the difference between our
feelings and our emotions? Karla McLaren, researcher and
author of The Language of Emotions defines an emotion as a noun and a feeling as a verb.

An emotion is a
physiological experience or state of awareness that gives you some information about the world (emotions are action-requiring
neurological programs) 

A feeling is
your conscious awareness that brings you to that emotion. 

How do I get to
this place of underlying emotions?

We name
these feelings and emotions through journaling, coaching, therapy, meditation, qigong
and other consciousness raising practices that create awareness. For
instance, knowing that the emotion of
anger is present, we can choose to feel the anger (which we have gotten in
touch with through naming our feeling)
so we can heal! Healing is the gift of wholeness that the emotions bring to us!

Thought
-> Feeling -> Naming emotion from the feeling -> FEELING it ->
Action/Behavior->
Creating our Circumstances and Reality

As Matthew Lieberman at UCLA discovered, simply naming your emotions can help you work with and calm them; this list will help you develop a precise emotional vocabulary.

Are you aware of a
feeling when it gets triggered?

Can you name the
feeling and underlying emotions so you may heal?

Do you have an
honest outlet for your feelings and emotions?

What wound in your
past has been poked and what emotions can you get in touch with in order to
feel and heal into your divine life purpose?

Emotional Vocabulary List

Feel free to share this with your
friends and family!

Karla McLaren

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ANGER~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anger Lite

Annoyed ~ Frustrated ~ Cross ~ Apathetic ~ Peeved ~ Irritated ~ Cranky ~ Crabby ~ Bored ~ Impatient ~ Critical ~ Cold ~ Displeased ~ Rankled ~ Detached ~ Indifferent

Anger in its Mood State

Angry ~ Mad ~ Offended ~ Antagonized ~ Bristling ~ Sarcastic ~ Aggravated ~ Arrogant ~ Indignant ~ Inflamed ~ Affronted ~ Resentful ~ Incensed ~ Exasperated ~ Riled up

Intense Anger

Hostile ~ Aggressive ~ Livid ~ Outraged ~ Furious ~ Belligerent ~ Disgusted ~ Appalled ~ Bitter ~ Ranting ~ Raving ~ Contemptuous ~ Hateful ~ Vengeful ~ Vindictive ~ Violent ~ Irate ~ Menacing ~ Seething ~ Vicious ~ Spiteful

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~SADNESS~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sadness Lite

Regretful ~ Disappointed ~ Disconnected ~ Distracted ~ Low ~ Listless ~ Wistful

Sadness in its Mood State

Sad ~ World-weary ~ Down ~ Melancholy ~ Mournful ~ Weepy ~ Grieving ~ Gloomy ~ Dejected ~ Downtrodden ~ Heavy-hearted ~ Forlorn ~ Sorrowful ~ Dispirited ~ Discouraged ~ Drained

Intense Sadness

Despairing ~ Bleak ~ Despondent ~ Depressed ~ Anguished ~ Inconsolable ~ Grief-stricken ~ Hopeless ~ Heartbroken ~ Morose ~ Bereaved

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~HAPPINESS~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Happiness Lite

Smiling ~ Upbeat ~ Peaceful ~ Calm ~ Amused ~ Open ~ Friendly ~ Encouraged ~ Hopeful ~ Inspired ~ Jovial

Happiness in its Mood State

Happy ~ Glad ~ Content ~ Optimistic ~ Cheerful ~ Joyful ~ Satisfied ~ Lively ~ Delighted ~ Rejuvenated ~ Pleased ~ Gratified ~ Excited ~ Gleeful ~ Merry ~ Playful

Intense Happiness

Elated ~ Exhilarated ~ Manic ~ Giddy ~ Euphoric ~ Awe-filled ~ Blissful ~ Enthralled ~ Rapturous ~ Jubilant ~ Ecstatic ~ Overjoyed ~ Radiant

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~FEAR~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fear Lite

Alert ~ Hesitant ~ Pensive ~ Watchful ~ Cautious ~ Curious ~ Leery ~ Uneasy ~ Doubtful ~ Confused ~ Apprehensive ~ Shy ~ Concerned ~ Disquieted ~ Timid ~ Edgy ~ Fidgety ~ Disconcerted ~ Insecure ~ Indecisive ~ Disoriented

Fear in its Mood State

Fearful ~ Afraid ~ Suspicious ~ Startled ~ Unnerved ~ Anxious ~ Nervous ~ Worried ~ Alarmed ~ Shaky ~ Perturbed ~ Aversive ~ Wary ~ Distrustful ~ Rattled ~ Unsettled ~ Jumpy

Intense Fear

Terrorized ~ Shocked ~ Panicked ~ Filled with Dread ~ Horrified ~ Phobic ~ Petrified ~ Paralyzed

~~~~~~~~~~~JEALOUSY & ENVY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lite Jealousy and Envy

Suspicious ~ Insecure ~ Distrustful ~ Protective

Mood-State Jealousy and Envy

Jealous ~ Envious ~ Covetous ~ Threatened ~ Demanding ~ Desirous

Intense Jealousy and Envy

Greedy ~ Grasping ~ Persistently jealous ~ Possessive ~ Resentful ~ Threatened ~ Avaricious ~ Gluttonous ~ Green with envy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~SHAME & GUILT~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lite Shame

Hesitant ~ Flushed ~ Self-conscious ~ Speechless ~ Discomforted ~ Awkward ~ Humble ~ Reticent ~ Abashed ~ Flustered ~ Withdrawn

Shame in its Mood State

Ashamed ~ Guilty ~ Embarrassed ~ Intimidated ~ Penitent ~ Regretful ~ Remorseful ~ Chagrined ~ Culpable ~ Reproachful ~ Sheepish ~ Rueful ~ Contrite ~ Humbled

Intense Shame

Humiliated ~ Guilt-ridden ~ Guilt-stricken ~ Disgraced ~ Stigmatized ~ Mortified ~ Demeaned ~ Self-condemning ~ Self-flagellating ~ Degraded ~ Shamefaced ~ Belittled ~ Ostracized

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Talking Away the Pain

2012-05-10T10:12:00.001-07:00

According to UCLA psychologist Matthew Lieberman, “putting problems into WORDs or naming them, eases emotional stress”. Putting feelings into words may activate a part of the prefrontal cortex, which in turn may suppress the area of the brain that produces emotional distress and pain. This suggests that coaching/therapy supports the prefrontal cortex and keeps it fired up, which may influence the amygdala from going into flight or fight or freeze.

Telling the truth... Acknowledging the truth out loud... Journaling the truth to freedom.

By Lea Winerman Monitor Staff
October 2006, Vol 37, No. 9 Print version: page 35

Tell your troubles to a Guatemalan worry doll, place it beneath your pillow and, according to legend, those worries will be gone by morning. That's just one example of the culture-spanning idea that putting problems into words can blunt those problems' emotional impact. Centuries of thinkers-from Spinoza to William James to every psychologist who practices talk therapy-have recognized this peculiar power of language, according to UCLA psychologist Matthew Lieberman, PhD. "There's this idea that putting bad feelings into words can help wash worries away," said Lieberman at APA's 2006 Annual Convention. He described how he and his colleagues are investigating that idea using brain imaging. In a study published in Science (Vol. 302, No. 5643, pages 290-292) in 2003, Lieberman and his colleague used functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) to scan the brains of participants as they played a computer game called "cyberball." In cyberball, participants think that they're playing an onscreen version of catch with two other people who are using computers linked to their own. For a while the two other people throw the ball regularly to the participant's onscreen character, but after a while they stop and begin to throw the ball only to each other. In reality, the other people don't exist and the "game" is simply an automatic computer program, but the participant doesn't know this and feels the sting of social rejection. Using fMRI, the researchers found that this social rejection activated an area of the brain that also lights up in response to physical pain-the anterior cingulate cortex. However, they also found that people who had relatively less activity in that area-and who reported feeling relatively less distress-had more activity in the right ventral lateral prefrontal cortex, an area of the brain associated with verbalizing thoughts and language production. So, according to Lieberman, this suggests that putting feelings into words may activate this part of the prefrontal cortex, which may in turn suppress the area of the brain that produces emotional distress. In another study, to be published in an upcoming issue of Psychological Science, Lieberman and his colleagues tested their language hypothesis more directly. They asked 30 participants to view pictures of angry, scared or happy-looking faces. Half of the time the participants tried to match the target face to another picture of a face with a similar expression. The other half of the time, they tried to match the face to a word that correctly labeled its emotion. Using fMRI, the researchers found that when the participants labeled the faces' emotions using words, they showed less activity in the amygdala-an area of the brain associated with emotional distress. At the same time, they showed more activity in the right ventral lateral prefrontal cortex-the same language-related area that showed up in the cyberball study. So, again, this suggests that verbalizing an emotion may activate the right ventral lateral prefrontal cortex, which then suppresses the areas of the brain that produce emotional pain. "[In talk therapy] we tend to focus primarily on content and enhanced understandings and changed understandings," said Lieberman. "But it's not entirely irrelevant that they all involve putting feelings into words."

Finding Enough Time Exercise

2012-04-09T20:45:00.000-07:00

When you are responsible for running a household or a business in these challenging times, the biggest obstacle is finding enough ENERGY, enough TIME or enough MONEY to take care of everything and everyone. If you are like me, it is a challenge to balance family, friends and personal time! Time and time again we say, “There isn't enough time or I didn’t have enough time to____”!

What is time?

Where does time live?
Why don’t we ever seem to have enough of it?
Who chooses how we experience time?

In the beginning of our coaching journey we are asked to define what makes up a Human
Being. We relate to ourselves in two different ways. How do we relate to ourselves in Human and what is needed to access Being? Whatever your answer is for Human than Being must be everything else.

If time is a rate of measurement that is variable, can we experience it differently when we connect to it in Human or from Being? Can we choose who controls our experience of time?

It’s not possible to stay connected in Being all of the time, because we live within a physical body. Knowing there is a difference however, allows us to navigate and consciously choose how we relate to ourselves, and from that knowing place of Human or Being, create our circumstances and our reality which includes our relationship with time.

When we THINK about needing to get something done in time, create time limits and mark time, our thoughts go rummaging through our mental filing cabinet, where all memories and attachments to time live in our past. In this structured and defended Human place we battle, we resist, we perfect, try hard, want to, strive for, have less then and no time for… We get swept up in life recreating itself, in our relationship to time.
Try this Life Creations Time Exercise:
Look at the second hand on a time piece and for one minute and try and Manage Time.
Ready set, go!

How did that feel? Were you able to control time?

Now, take another minute and Experience Time.
Ready…Go!

How did that feel and what was different this time?
Which one gave you the most time or a quality of time you can live with?
Time is a period of measurement and we choose how we are going to be in relationship with our self and others in regard to time.
How can you experience time differently today?
How can you create a different relationship with self in time, connected to Being where you trust, acknowledge and own that time lives gracefully in between your heart beats, daily tasks, errands, thoughts, feelings and actions?
What choices can you make to connect to time in a healthier way?
Is there enough time in a synchronized Human Being?

Look at how we manipulate, capture and freeze time in
Nature Time Lapse Photography

Power of Words, Video

2012-03-02T09:57:00.003-08:00

It's not what you say, but how you say it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=Hzgzim5m7oU&vq=medium

As far back as my mind will take me, every time I left the house, my mother would say: Be careful and I would say, okay, you too! During a recent home visit, an elderly woman said the very same thing to her grown son, Be Careful, she said, as her son pushed open the aluminum glass slider, into his world. And what did he say, wait for it… okay. When I observe my family, I get it. Decisions were made and influenced by fear. My father was afraid of commies, other races, liberals and religion. Be Careful. My brother and I carried this family legacy of Be Careful in our lives too. Fear was the reason he briefly joined the intelligence community, to rid the world of fear and bad guys. He was just the opposite of careful in his life after that. Stories, books and conversations, he left us with, were about the thrill of fear, the demon fear, fear in movies and being fearless. Fear still owned him.

I chose edgy men, went into hospice work, conducted home and family funeBe Careful, instead of the other way around, I am free!
rals. I pushed through extremes to help me conquer my fears. Layered and many, my choices created more fear. All risk taking, experimenting and non-conforming had a root relationship to my past and my desire for freedom from fear. I searched emotionally, intellectually and spiritually for the way to be free. When I realized that fighting against something as big as a human need safety, reinforced daily for more then 50 years, I got it, this is never going away. Be Careful is where I came from. Be Careful is in my cells. Be careful is what I am. When I can surrender to this concept, and own

In this journey of uncovering, I found my freedom from Be Careful, by owning it. Coaching not only uncovers unconscious beliefs that keep our patterns reproducing identical outcomes, but frees us to accept them. No longer in resistance, ease and space allows us to connect to a new and conscious relationship to self.

My past got me here and I am grateful. In later years when my Mom was softer and trusting she used say, I love you and be careful. What would happen, if everyday we left the house, we were to say to ourselves: I love you, be hopeful, be trusting, be joyful, be powerful, be accepting and be free.

“Change your words. Change Your World.”

Freedom I am ready!

2012-01-31T10:51:00.001-08:00

I’m not feeling free this morning, yet here I am, writing about Freedom. Speaking my truth, and grateful for the kindness and acceptance from friends who write for a living.

I met Alejandra Crisafulli in 2009 at a Life Creations Education, Roles We Play retreat, in Ojai, California. Sight unseen and wildly trusting, I journeyed down with friend to see if I could open to alone, mad, sad and bad, and stop the cycle of pain I was re-creating in my life.

Desperately trying to be a hero for everyone else, in an illusion that this would heal me or help me deal with my own grief and loss, I was saying yes to everyone but myself. Identifying as hero, was keeping me stuck in an unconscious commitment to a pain pattern of not worth anything, that most of us learn as children.

I was all up in my drama:

Clients are taking away my energy. I need more boundaries I am taking on everyone's pain. I’m too sensitive. I want to get back to connecting with my own goodness.

Whoa, really, a hero? That sounded strangely like a victim speaking. The next three days I started to unzip my life. Disconnecting and being unseen was familiar. It was easier to live in life is hard, life as betrayal, and life as loss, then to feel and heal. Patterns and cycles of: need to be right, cause trouble, feel separate and shattered, committed me to suffering and sacrifice. Naming this, allowed me to step out of my own way and step into a healing formula. Out there I learned that on the other side of fear is Freedom.

How can freedom of movement release us, when we haven’t moved physically, emotionally or spiritually in years?
Why is this life coaching journey transformational?

How we relate to ourselves through our thoughts, behaviors and actions create our circumstances, relationships and reality. A journey of owning our human and being, through these 13 beautiful calls from Life Creations Education, is the road to freedom.

Throughout the year, I will be sharing with you, what frees me every day. What unleashes my life purpose.
Join me on a journey from the probable to what’s absolutely possible! Come move with me…