Sh**k in Kazakhstan

Still in Kazakhstan...

2013-04-21T19:57:00.001+06:00

...like a Snowtrooper in the desert.

My Hat is in the Ring.

2012-09-16T19:58:00.001+06:00

It has been a hectic week for me. Ranging from opening up Pearl Bubble Tea & Coffee to some things more personal and back to more bubble tea.

I am tired beyond comprehensive belief. I think I have averaged about 20 hours of sleep the past two weeks and I may just about get the same amount of sleep this week, maybe less.

I am doing my best to bring all of my experience to use to make this business venture run properly and do well. Yet there are some setbacks and some handicaps that are preventing me from doing my best.

My Russian is pretty shitty, so communicating with staff and customers has been difficult. Let alone all the other people I encounter on a daily basis, at best I can offer them is a "hello" and "how are you?"

School is in session, the malls are always packed during the summer and winter breaks. We opened the second week of September and have seen lesser crowds and pretty slow days. 2/3 of my staff are essentially students so dealing with their schedules and whatnot has been an experience.

But I digress, you should do your best and watch what happens. If you succeed, do what makes you successful. If you fail, change your ways until you see continuous success. I am determined to do well despite being so tired.

I have not been depressed or sad as I have been in previous months. I feel somewhat uplifted perhaps by hoodie weather and finally getting the first shop open. I also have been going out more checking out the city that I have been living in for nearly seven months.

The buses oh the buses - that one is a separate post. I have tons to say about the bus situation here.

I have been smoking less. The other day I ran for the bus for about twenty feet and it was difficult to run.

So as my brain is dysfunctional as that I cannot properly post anything, I'll have to save the good posts for later.

That's jamiroquai and buses.

Sweet baby Nazarbayev, We made it in Almaty.

Photo of the Day 9/3/12

2012-09-03T12:07:00.001+06:00

Kid walking in the courtyard swinging around a Darth Maul lightsaber. Too cute.

Gone.

2012-09-03T12:03:00.001+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
12:03pm 09/03/2012

I am losing my fucking mind.

Sometimes it seems I am way in over my head. Sometimes I have this restless feeling that nothing is being done because nothing can be done - I feel absolutely powerless over the situation. And then there are the times where I am in the middle of it all, working non-stop, getting stuff done but, the clutter comes in and everything seemingly grinds to a halt although "progress is made."

Right now I am racking my brains out - I need to get things done but, I need to get out, too. I need to leave this place which has almost nothing to offer me, although I appreciate the small things here and there. In the grand scheme of things, I am not happy - so, of course it is the little things that carry you along, right?

This past weekend was a period of inactivity on our part, I guess one last day off until the world ends. Saturday night we went out to a sauna, which was nice and relaxing (I guess as relaxing it could be when you're with your dad uncle and a bunch of other dudes getting drunk.) I could imagine throwing a party there with friends but, that won't happen. I enjoyed the place for what it was. It was a large space with a pool table, ping pong table, some couches, a large tv, two beds, a pool, showers, and a sauna room. It was good and I enjoyed it but, I can't say I relaxed.

And now, here I am on Monday with so many things to do but they aren't being done or can't be done. I have no equipment and, my employees, 2/3 have school, are in school but don't know their school schedules until today or tomorrow...which is ridiculous. Nothing is straight forward here, there always is something out from left field. You'd think I'd understand that more and would be able to deal with it immediately but, that's not the case. I enjoy a challenge but, this is beyond such - this whole venture in fact is leaving a bad taste in my mouth. And that I cannot bare. I have ideas and things to do back home but, after this, I do not even know I want to do any of those things.

Ahh for fuck sakes.

I need to plot my return.

Photo of the Day 08/12/2012

2012-08-12T13:18:00.001+06:00

Apparently I am not the only American who has visited Kazakhstan.

This Blog Post is What Propels Me

2012-08-09T21:35:00.002+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
08/09/2012 9:35 pm

Как дела?

It's been awhile - I've been rather busy and running about losing my mind in Kazakhstan. Kazakhstan being the world's largest landlocked country. I'd tell you of all the ridiculous things I see happen here every day but, I'll save that for later. Do not fret - there is plenty of nonsense that goes on in this steppe.

So, originally, my father's friend (who will not be named) said it would be a good idea to open a coffee shop in Kazakhstan because when he was in New York he would drink coffee and see New Yorkers drink coffee all of the time. Of course, he failed to tell us almost no one in Kazakhstan (not even himself) drinks coffee here because of high blood pressure due to the high altitude. I wanted to shoot myself in the foot as soon as I heard this. This was nearly two months after I came to Almaty, doing research and figuring out how to open a coffee shop in this New York of Kazakhstan.

But, needless to say we are onto a new concept that is attractive and exciting - I'd tell you (if you know, you know) but, I want to keep it quiet until we're ready to open. Let's just say we'll be the first and be putting an emphasis on quality instead of quantity. My past few years have taught me a lot about doing the right thing and being the better person and that's how I want to conduct business - giver everyone (including myself) a square deal so that no one is treated better than the other although customers come first.

I've been through a lot the past few months. Waves of depression calmed down by moments of small yet significant progress. The concept of marriage has been thrown at me quite a lot recently, and needless to say, I am not really about that. The last thing I need is for something other than business and family to tie me down to this part of the world. I'm understanding more and more about the way Kazakh people think - and holy shit talk about YOLOSWAGYOLO. (I'll get more into it later, I promise.)

My Russian is an absolute mess and so is my room. I'm developing insomnia or something as Kang would know. But, I'm pretty much working and am able to communicate to the people who I am working with here and there. Luckily, the people down at the convenience stores now know I'm not an idiot just an American who does not know Russian very well.

Anyway, I am going to get back to work. But, I promise another update soon. More updates.

But remember, in case I am too busy - No update, no cry. (Fuck that was lame.)

'Till next time,
Shaak

Gone Hunting Part One: "A Super Expedition"

2012-03-27T17:05:00.000+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
3/26/2012 12:00 pm

Being in Kazakhstan has its ups and downs. As you've read my posts, you know Almaty is gray city. Flanked by mountains and covered by a neverending smog, Almaty can seem depressing at times. Yet, it has its escapes and paradises not too far away. Shymbulak, where I went to the mountains is a gorgeous place although it is packed and tends to get overcrowded by early afternoon. But if you really want nature, in its purest and unadulterated form, you go to the Kazakh steppe.

The brushlands of Kazakhstan's Steppe

Tap for one black mana, cast Dark Ritual. Swamp!

Perhaps, similar to the badlands of Colorado and the Dakotas, yet unique in its own fucking way, the Kazakh steppe is practically three separate ecosystems blended together. It's part swamp, part brushland, and part desert, with lakes rivers thriving and flowing throughout the region. There, to me at least, is nothing like it.

Rivers of ice anyone?

I went hunting for a few days in Kazakhstan. The trip was great - bully, I'd say - or as one of the guys I went along with said, "Super Expedition!" My initial fears going into the trip was that everything would be lost in translation and later on I would be Cheneyed in the face. My fears soon vanished as I got along with all of the guys on the trip and that the only thing that got Cheneyed were two empty boxes of aloe juice/nectar/water/drank.

Hey guys! Shaak (L) Azamet (C) Anwar (R)

So, we left Almaty around 2:00 am on Thursday and arrived at our destination at some time around 11:30 am. What was supposed to have been a four hour drive turned into nearly ten hours as our mighty vehicle, a more than twenty year old Jeep Cherokee Laredo constantly broke down due to radiator issues and the vehicle itself getting stuck in mud - talk about rolling in the deep. When we finally arrived to the ranch, we were greeted by the family that was hosting us. They split their house into two, one part for themselves while the other is rented out by people like us trying to enjoy a few days in the wild going hunting, fishing, doing whatever.

Photo-Op while the radiator cools down. Zhenet in the center,
flanked by Shaak (L) and Anwar, the driver (R)

After lunch, we settled down our belongings and got ready for the first hunt of the day. Our target: ducks on ducks on ducks. After gearing up in nearly thigh high waterproof boots, hunting vests, stocking enough ammunition for our three shotguns and, bringing a bottle of vodka and some juice, we set out with our guide to go shoot some ducks. As we piled into the car driving the Kazakh steppe in search of suitable duck hunting terrain, I admit I still did not feel completely comfortable with the hunting situation. Yet as we got closer to the hunting grounds, I was ready to make a good time out of it all. And then the car got stuck in the mud for what seemed to be the twelfth time since we left Almaty.

Azamet, our guide, leads the pack. Azamet, not
our guide, carries the vodka. I hold the rear.

We disembarked from the Jeep, intent on shooting down some duck. Through the swamps and the thick brush we trotted, aiming high and missing out on the action - where the car got stuck left us halfway in between where we wanted to be. In between what seemed like forced marches by our guide, Azamet, who shared the same name as one of my hunting companions, we indulged in target practice and vodka. The land was barren of civilization except for the occasional dirt road we stumbled upon and empty shotgun shells from previous hunting trips.

After hours of walking and and waiting, attempting to ambush our winged friends, we yielded nothing. By three pm we took a break and re-grouped, figuring out where to go next. After some rest and plenty of vodka to go around we resumed our march through the marshlands through still icy waters and mud as deep one's shins. I was pretty drained at that point - having not slept the night before and not sleeping well during the ride to the hunting grounds. At this point, albeit the alcohol did not help, I decided to take a nap under the wonderful Kazakh sun.

We hunting! Well, I'm walking enjoying the view as Zhenet lugs

the ammunition for our first hunt. Anwar sallies forth with the
double barrel shotgun. We're actually slowed down because of
the cold water and thick mud. We eventually got separated from
both Azamets as they know the terrain better than we did.

We regrouped. This was before my lovely nap.

Anwar passed out in some bushes and we're all
looking out before we shoot some more.

In tall grass without any

Pokemon. Help?

What happened one hour later - well you could imagine. I missed out on some action and I woke up looking like a crab with what has been the worst headache in my life. Azamet, our guide, shot down and killed two ducks; our guys, not a single bird. After deciding to call it a day, we retreated back to the Jeep only to find it stuck deeper in mud. To no avail, after an hour of doing what we could to get the car out from being stuck - we failed. With no cellphone service to call anyone and the cold steppe winds of Kazakhstan approaching, we grudgingly abandoned the Jeep as the sun set on the steppes.

Here I pose with Anwar's kill after we abandoned the Jeep to head
back to the cabin before dark.

I Cheneyed the Aloe Vera juice box.

As we trekked back to the cabin, we cut through the swamp and brush lands with renewed energy and more vodka. We were intent on arriving back at the cabin before the sun set, before the bitter winds and the wolves came out. It was at this point where I witnessed our guide's accuracy with a rifle as we threw an empty bottle of vodka in the air and he blew through it in one shot. It was this shot that alerted some ducks in the area and allowed another member of our hunting group to shoot down one of those ducks. Luckily, we reached a point where we were able to get cellphone reception and someone picked us up halfway. If only we knew that this occurrence would foreshadow what was to come two days later.

Azamet, our guide, goes for the kill.
We all watch.

One of his many kills - empty bottles of vodka. Not to forget two

of the three ducks our party killed in our foray.

To pick us up came Azamet's father and their good friend Dmitriy Petrukhin, the world traveler, hunter and explorer. As we arrived back at the cabin, we were fortunate to have dinner cooked for us - macaroni and lamb. We ate well after having such a long day. Although a few minutes into dinner, my headache turned into massive throbbing and I was forced to retire early for the evening...

The sun sets on a barren yet naturally beautiful land.

Eto Moё Hot Dog!

2012-03-19T10:56:00.000+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
03/19/2012 10:21 am

Yesterday was the first day in the past ten days that I had a day off. It was amazing doing nothing but watching Clone Wars and re-reading Theodore Rex. It's also made me realize that it's good to have some form of escape/humor/enjoyment in between work and everything else so that you just don't go crazy. I have been a bit crazy the past couple of weeks as frustration from how slow things are takes over but every day seems to be a reset button with a diminishing power.

So, as I have been taking photos when I can, I think I try to take photos of what amuses me here. Cause I think I need that - the little shit that is odd or just funny in a way. To me at least. I have others but, am currently having a problem uploading them right here to this blog. Well, here is a couple - enjoy.

Powdered milk anyone? I like how this brand, Moё, offers a variety of milk fat percentages. The packaging is interesting, too. I mean, look at it. There's one for every gender/age group. Kids drink the 3.2% cause they need strong bones. Women drink the 2.5% cause they are weight conscious. And the men? Fuck it. They want 6.0% cause they are men and men don't give a fuck, right? Oh and one liter of this stuff costs about $1.50.

They have an energy drink called "Hot Dog." I do not know what to say and I do not know how to approach it - I am scared to try. I do not need my pee to turn a certain color. Although it is silly of me to say that cause apparently I'll eat Crab flavored chips (nasty) but I won't drink Hot Dog? But, they also have Red Bull!!! Should I try this stuff?

Enjoy the technical difficulty.

'Till next time,

Shaak

Photo of The Day: Nuts!

2012-03-16T16:49:00.000+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan

03/16/2012 4:40 pm

Guys - They got a candy bar here called Nuts. I know I know - Shaakber eating a Candy Bar with Nuts in his mouth.
Think of Hazelnut Snickers. Win. But the Nuts in my mouth...not so much :|

Photo of The Day: 03/15/2012

2012-03-15T17:59:00.000+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
03/15/2012 5:48 pm

Hai,

Ever since my few brief encounters with security, I have been taking less photos. You ignorant fucks, it's a photo not a goddamn bomb. If someone wanted to blow your shit up, they would do it. That's not what I'm trying to do. I'm just trying to take a fucking photo, dickbag.

Anyway...This photo was taken at one of several Sulpak electronic stores here in Almaty. Think of Sulpak as the Best Buy and Circuit City of Kazakhstan. So, you know how you go shopping, whether it's for clothes, electronics, or even groceries, and you get what you want and you head over to the register to pay? And there's that little section of shit you never would buy until you saw it by the register and you think on impulse, "MAYBE I NEED THIS PACK OF WHITENING GUM" or "OMG BRAD PITT IS NOT SEXUALLY FULFILLING ANGELINA JOLIE'S RIGHT LEG'S NEEDS - THANKS NATIONAL ENQUIRER!"? Well, here at this Sulpak location they offer cutting boards and knives as last minute impulse purchases just in case you forget to pick one up before you head home.

"Maybe I need a knife to go with that washing machine and Samsung Smart TV I just bought. Ahh fuck it. I'll just buy the knife"

Nazarbayev, The Good Despot?

2012-03-15T16:57:00.002+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
02/27/2012 5:40 pm (Updated 03/15/2012 4:25 pm)

Kazakh Constitution

This has to be the most straight forward government document I have ever read in my life. Everything from human rights, rights of the individual, health care, education - the things that "Republicans" in the United States cry as "Socialism" is all here in plain text in this document. It seems that the Kazakhs can have it pretty well as opposed to other neighboring countries where rights are tossed aside in the name of "security."

This is no United States with just two major parties - this country got many parties, and right now the government is made up of a coalition of them. The president, Nursultan Nazarbayev, has been elected by a huge majority during each election. The last election that took place in the country was in 2011, where Nazarbayev took about 95% of the vote. He chose to have an election after declining a petition to let him stay in office until 2020. Now, it might seem fishy - who the fuck wins by that much?

This fucking guy. Nursultan Nazarbayev

This man since the beginning and several years before the establishment of the Republic of Kazakhstan has been the country's leader. And for good reason, the economy is growing, foreign investment is huge and every move the government makes seems to have some benefit for the people. What else? Oh, he got rid of the nuclear weapons, that the U.S.S.R. decided to place in Kazakhstan during the Cold War, with the help of the United States cause he did not want WMDs in his country. Every election when western democratic watch dog groups visit Kazakhstan there seems to be a consensus among the population - fuck you, this is our guy. No one protests over here like you see going on in Syria or in Moscow. Ain't no Arab Spring going on here.

But, who knows? Maybe it's his time to step down. Give someone else the reigns, right? According to the Democracy Index, Kazakhstan is listed as authoritarian regime. Why? Cause the same guy has been president of the country since its inception and for some time before during the Soviet system. So, according to the Western view of democracy - he should go. I still don't know much about this country but, unlike the United States where anyone and everyone shits on Obama, no one shits on this guy except for the little opposition parties that don't even garner five percent of the vote in elections.

Do you know an authoritarian regime that gets rid of its nuclear weapons and gives its people basic rights? I don't. I say again, I have not been here for long. I've had a beard going on right and I've gotten funny looks from people when I go out to the malls and such. Yet, I have not been stopped by the authorities. No place is perfect, yet we all strive for that in politics and there are critics a plenty for no matter what you do. Mind you I've shaved about two weeks into my journey here.

Kazakhstan in the green. (Wikipedia)

Every time I am in Uzbekistan, I am told not to speak about politics or economics or anything smart for that matter. You say one thing, whether it's right or left (wrong,) in front of the wrong person and you could get arrested. They make you pay for shit like that over there - either with your wallet and/or possibly your life. But, here in Kazakhstan, it's different. Everyone criticizes the government (honestly, who the fuck does not?) cause they're free to say that shit.

So, I ask the people in the West and the East (except for the North, the South and, Uzbekistan) to think about Kazakhstan. Think about the surrounding countries. Look at their human rights record. Look at their regimes. Their governments. I think Kazakhstan is a shining light in a sea of darkness. And even if for a second Nazarbayev doesn't want to give up power, he's done more good than bad for these people.

'Till next time,

Shaak.

p.s.

Although they did ban Borat for some reason. ┐('～`；)┌

Calling Out (*ﾟﾉOﾟ)<ｵｵｵｵｫｫｫｫｫｫｫｰｰｰｰｰｲ!

2012-03-11T13:04:00.000+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan

03/11/2012 12:20 pm

Privet suki! Kak dela?

Faithful reader(s), I have been in Kazakhstan for about one month. March 15th marks my one month departure date from New York, although my one month "anniversary" is technically March 17th. Time goes by when you travel into the future. It is hard to believe I have actually been here all this time. It is as if I am in bizarro world. Actually, I want to say that I am in bizarro world especially coming here from New York City (greatest city in the world). Although this isn't my "been here one month fuck this place" post - I want to give this place a chance. If you cannot enjoy or be happy where you live, how can you live?

Many of you have said, "go make friends" and "go out and do stuff." That, I will admit and if you know me, is easier said than done. I've met a few people here and there but, no one I could consider a friend as I have only seen them once and the language barrier is huge. Let us not forget, I am an awkward fuck in social situations.

Kazakhstan Cognac. This small handle for under $1.50.
Surprisingly really good. Not Hennessy or Courvosier.
But as cheap liquor goes, this stuff is amazing.

Top shelf is beer on display. Nothing worthy of comment!
But the gem here in this photo are the bars of chocolate conveniently packaged together with bottles of cognac. A great pairing for that special woman in your life for International Women's Day!

They give you a selection of which bad beers to drink as well as a variety of smoked fish to nom on with your bad beer. :/

I went to a bar and all the beers they have on tap suck ass...It's all poured into plastic two liter bottles which I doubt they even rinse or clean properly :/

#MoreBelve plz.

Imported brands, the ones you can find in the United States, are pretty expensive here in regards to Tenge and size of the product. Bottles of hard liquor in the states are generally 750ml or 1l. Over here they are .5l, .7l and, 1l - so that one time I got a bottle of Jim Bean for about twenty dollars was .7l. But, for the taste of home - it was worth every drop.

I'd review the coffee situation here but, it's more depressing than bambi, old yeller, and Star Wars Episode One combined. I guess one bright spot here is 4A Coffee - they roast their own coffee and it's pretty damn good for Almaty. I did visit their location and it's small and cozy. I would like to go there again but it is out of the way for me. Perhaps on my second trip there I will give them a proper "review."

Back to work, I guess. Oh, and in the future - they stop Kony.

'till next time,

Shaak.

Car City Here We Come

2012-03-10T13:29:00.001+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
03/10/2012 12:50 pm

Hey guys,

I have been lazy. You can take that as a sign that I begun to lose hope. Work is slower than I ever imagined. Russian is a really damn hard language to learn from the bottom up. Almaty is dirty - the air is not great and everything from the buildings to the roads to the cars are just covered in a mixture of dirt, snow and, ice. Yet, people say this place has a future. Perhaps it does but, I think Almaty's time has not come just yet. There are plenty of signs of the old Soviet infrastructure that are decaying in the midst of development and modernization efforts. These people may be used to it - I am not. Needless to say, it is difficult to call this place "home" for the next few months.

Taking photos of things I see has been more difficult than I thought as well. Many people here do not like it when someone is walking around taking photos, regardless of what is in the shot. I have had someone throw something at me and plenty of people stare me down. I even had a slight confrontation with a security guard because he thought I was being suspicious. Yet, I have done nothing illegal nor have I done anything unethical or anything of that nature. My goal in taking photos is to have a way to connect to you what I see here in Almaty and this part of the world.

But, I digress...So here we have a few photos of my trip to Car City - a large venue in Almaty where vendors sell auto parts, accessories, and other such things for your car. It's a car market.

See how dirty it can get? Back that car up - we've got to get to Car City!

Car City (Indoor portion) There was a kid roaming the aisles of vendors but, alas this guy got in the way.

One of the vendors that my father sells parts to. It was after this photo where I got into an "Imperial entanglement."

CARCITY.KZ You can find them on the internets unlike most things and markets here.

This is the building for the indoor market. Only half the building though.

"Brunch" at Car City, we went to one of the shaslik vendors for some food. Onions soaked in white vinegar and red pepper with Russian black bread.

Possibly the best kebab I've had here thus far (the only kebab I've had here thus far). Three lamb, one chicken. The lamb was cooked to perfection - the fat was crisp and the meat was soft and tender. The chicken however tasted like lighter fluid...........

Gotta wash down that lighter fluid taste with some cold beer.

Happy International Women's Day? Need last minute flowers, gifts, chocolates? Get ripped off and buy them or else you a bad bad man.

Well, I hope you kids enjoy. There is more to come, if I ever get to it.

'Till next time,

Shaak.

Kazah: NSFVegeterians

2012-03-06T17:58:00.000+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
03/06/2012 5:53 pm

Privet suki!

So, here it is. After many attempts and failures, I bring you a little video on how Kazah, the delectable Kazakh horse sausage is prepared. This video consists of the initial preparation which includes selecting the meat being used and how much fat one would want to incorporate as well as any additional seasonings. The next step, not in this video is to cure the Kazah and, after to cook it. Then, enjoy.

So, enjoy the video!

'Till next time,

Shaak.

Photo of The Day: 03/05/2012

2012-03-06T00:55:00.001+06:00

Privet!

My new best friend. Well, my potential new best friend. Coming from America going off to a foreign land, I want to try new things. Coming from America and wanting to try new things means trying new flavors of Lays chips I've never had before. Well, hey, not every new discovery or part of my trip has to be "authentic" or whatever. I saw this bag of chips and bought it. Now, time to watch some Walking Dead and eat some Shaslik flavored chips...

p.s. Video on Kazah making will be up by tomorrow. I've been having problems uploading the video but, I finally figured it out.

'Till next time,

Shaak.

UPDATE: So, those chips weren't all that I expected them to be. They were not salty like they are in the United States and it was as if the low amount of sodium in these chips killed the flavor of a savory meat flavored product. :'( Also, I blame eating these for my lethargic depression today.

Photo of The Day: 3/3/2012-3/4/2012

2012-03-04T11:55:00.002+06:00

Kak dela?

Shit in Kazakhstan is cheap. Well, many things definitely cost less here than they do in New York. Three examples:

1. You can get a great filling lunch for 8-10 people for about 2500 Tenge (Kazakhstan's national currency) which comes out to be 16.89 in US Dollars.

2. Cigarettes. Pick up brand names from Marlboro, Camel, and yes, even Virginia Slims for about a US Dollar a pack. They also have national Kazakh brands which I haven't tried but their packaging looks rather interesting. Prices vary from store to store but, the highest price point I've seen for a pack of smokes was 210 Tenge (roughly 1.41 USD).

3. Booze. As I've told some people before, you can buy alcohol for mad cheap. The different varieties between Vodkas and Cognacs and wines and beers differ but, for the most part they are all cheap. The most I've paid for a .7L of cognac was 1230 Tenge (8.31 USD) And with this third example comes Photo of The Day for March 3rd.

Dirt Cheap. 3-3.37 USD and it tastes like Vodka (not industrial lighter fluid or rubbing alcohol)

Although taken yesterday, the view in Panfilov Park, in the heart of Almaty, is quite beautiful. It somehow lends itself to be one of those parks where spies and diplomats secretly meet each other and trade documents and such. At the main entrance, there is a bust of Major General Ivan Panfilov himself (more about him later - he deserves his own post) and in the middle of the park is a beautiful cathedral decorated in gold, yellow, and a variety of pastels.

If it weren't for the concrete, I'd say we are in the middle of nowhere. She pretty ain't she?

'Till next time kids,

Shaak.

Photo of The Day: 3/2/2012

2012-03-02T14:25:00.000+06:00

Privet!

View of outside from the apartment - "Morning Fog." The proper mixture of smoke and fog sets Almaty up for its very own "Silent Hill". Perhaps they filmed that bad adaptation from a great video game here in Kazakhstan. Pollution FTW.

Shaak.

Baraholka Bazaar - They Got What You Need

2012-03-01T18:11:00.001+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
2/29/2012 11:36 am

Sup,

So, I've been in Kazakhstan for more than a week. Things are moving more slowly than I had expected. I've been researching coffee business models and how to write business plans but, I have to admit that it is not my forte. I dread office work and anything of the sort. I prefer to be more hands on and more direct in my work. But, I digress...

The car and foot traffic here is horrible yet, it adds to the atmosphere of what the Baraholka bazaar is.

These shipping containers are used for shops at Baraholka.

On Sunday, we took a trip out to Baraholka - possibly the largest outdoor/indoor market in Almaty. It's a no frills experience - everything is laid out in front of you and you have plenty of individual vendors to choose from in each section of the market. For the outdoor market, each vendor operates their business from a shipping container - that is their store and nothing else. The floors are covered in ice, so it is wise to dress warm and be mindful of where you step. Throughout the market, you have people lugging goods on carts so expect to be yelled at if you get in their way.

It's like I'm at QC again...

Kitchen Supply Section.

Knives anyone?

Beat yo' wife. Beat yo' horse. Beat yo' kids.

First horses I've seen in Kazakhstan.

We're looking at art - we fancy, huh?

I'll have my brandy in the glass all the way in the back...

Champagne bottle cozzies.

Traditional dress - I feel like someone would make their kid wear this for a pageant.

Want a wedding dress?

Horse/Wife Saddles.

If you need to take a break. Play some Backgammon.

Haish. Fan Span - One meter.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING IN THE MIDDLE. IT'S LIKE A COMBINATION FORK AND AFRO PICK.

All I can read at the moment is "Accesory"

That stuff on the right is like a hot dog or something...

Fancy bling to make your guests think you got SWAG while they be drinking yo chai.

Fresh squeezed juice - Pomegranate and Orange!

So it all ends...like any trip to a bazaar. You go, check it out, buy what you need and a few other knick knacks. There is food and there is drink. There are tons of people, too. Don't expect to be in and out within a reasonable amount of time. Give yourself at least three to four hours to check the whole place out and take it all in. This place is an old country shopping center done right. Welcome to Baraholka Bazaar.

'Till next time,

Shaak.

Photo of the Day (3/1/2012): Taken at Baraholka Bazaar. This guy with a CD player and two speakers DJing an outside section of Baraholka. Maybe next time I will bring my Beats stereo and we'll music battle it.

YO DJ HIGH-TECH, DROP THE MOTHERFUCKIN' ILL BEATS.

Best Purchase Ever

2012-02-27T10:20:00.002+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan

2/27/2012 10:15 am

Dobryi vecher!

So, apparently Sunday for us is Bazaar day which is a mixed bag of tiring and amazing. When I get the chance to upload some photos from yesterday's bazaar, you'll see all kinds of whatsits and whosits galore that they sell. Until then, I would like to entice you with my recent purchase of this "Kazakh Baseball Cap." It's made with the traditional material used by Kazakhs to make winter hats yet it is shaped and designed to be a baseball cap. If only it came with one of those fancy stickers.

Kazakh Swag got me sayin' YouOnlyKazakhOnce

'Till next time,

Shaak.

Altai Mountains - Almaty's Frozen Paradise

2012-02-24T16:33:00.001+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
2/24/2012 3:45 pm

Privet suki!

Things are going in Kazakhstan. Well enough, I tell myself. Well, enough to tell myself that it is all going well enough. I have been here for just about one week and things are just OK. I'm a little home sick but, that comes with any trip to a foreign land with not much to do. However, this morning my buddy, Yerlan, took my uncle and I out to the mountains for some fresh air and skiing.

Now I'm at the office/warehouse so I shall update you on this stunning beauty I've "discovered" in Almaty. I'm afraid these photos will not do the natural beauty of the Altai mountains any justice. But, as I am in Kazakhstan and you are (probably) not, it will have to do.

Pure beautiful nature circa. two kilometers above sea level.

We driving up the mountain pass.

-10 degrees Celsius at around 10:00 am.

"Ski Resort" Yerlan built the Presidential VIP suite for the Asian Winter Olympics.

View from the lift...again.

View from the lift.

Reppin' my Fing gloves by HSK. Hanging out with Yerlan.

Nearly three kilometers up in the atmosphere - shit is cold!

My favorite photo of this trip to the Altai Mountains. Yerlan and my uncle, Najot (Nick).

OK - so Yerlan was the only one to go skiing but the view and air was badly needed.

Hey dude - get out of the way!

The atmospheric pressure and weather is nothing to trifle with. The average elevation of Almaty is 800m, we drove up to the Altai mountains reaching an elevation of almost 3km. At the top of the slopes is where it was very cold, probably close to 0 degrees F/-17 degrees C. I layered up expecting near freezing temperatures but this took the cake and the cold seeped right through.

You can't get this in New York.

The Altai mountain range is no more than an hour away from Almaty - and that is with heavy traffic such as rush hour. The Altai mountains have provided a natural barrier for Kazakhstan where it borders Kyrgyzstan and China. For awhile, there was an incessant fear that China would expand westward from Xinjiang. The re-deployment of the capital from Almaty to Astana helped curb those fears. Yet, these mountains are more than just a natural defense and barrier from not so friendly countries. I hope you see the beauty that is in these photos - that pure white snow with the sun illuminating the darkest crevice in these mountains.

This snow is fucking fresh. Just imagine trying to trek these mountains by foot.

We got the best view of these mountains right here.

Lined with trees and little people skiing down the slope.

Coffee outdoors, anyone?

There were some really great videos I got the chance to take while up there but I've been having issues uploading them. When I get the chance, I'll upload them. The sooner the better - you have to see the views from the lift that I couldn't capture with just photos. I'm telling you this country can be beautiful - the trees, the snow, the mountains, gorges and, rivers all surrounding Almaty. I think I am in love with these mountains. I cannot wait to see them transform into green grass and forests. I'd love to give hiking a shot here. Of course, I'll have to snowboard down that slope first. I gotta have it.

I have to admit, it is a shame I have to head back into that smog drenched city after all this.

'Till next time,

Shaak.

Culture Theory: Driving in Almaty

2012-02-22T13:16:00.001+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
2/22/2012 6:50 am

Up early again. I haven't slept in or slept well since I've got here to Almaty. Haven't had the time to adjust.

Anyway, straight to bizniz. As I mentioned previously before about the road situation here in Almaty, it fucking sucks. There seems to be no rules or lanes or anything. Drivers here will cut you off, swivel around your car, stop short when they want and, will not give a fuck about you or anything. Well, almost anything - pedestrians over here love to cross the street whenever the fuck they want to not giving a shit if a car is a few feet away or not around at all. I have been here for less than one week and already I have seen almost two people get ran over. I think the odds are that I will see someone get hit during my stay here. Drivers and pedestrians do not give two, maybe three but, possibly seven or eight fucks about each other.

Maybe it's cause you can't see shit but then why drive like a maniac.
SLOW DOWN FOR FUCK'S SAKE.

JUST LIKE JAY-Z, KAZAKH PEOPLE PLAY CHICKEN WITH A MACK TRUCK.

So, here is my theory:

1. Drivers here learned how to drive by playing Mario Kart.

This is the best representation of what it is like to be on the road in Almaty.

2. The inspiration for the video game, Frogger comes from Kazakhstan. Who else would cross the street with two ways of traffic during rush hour like that? Seriously, it's as if these people are either trying to kill themselves or trying to prove their roots as the inspiration to this classic video game.

Frogger is Kazakh.

Almaty, Kazakhstan
2/22/2012 1:13 pm

Well, I have not much else to say. I'm brain dead after doing so much data entry. I want to forget. Now it's time for me to eat lunch and prep for my first Russian lesson.!

Drive safely!

'Till next time,

Shaak.

Sundays Can Be So Bazaar

2012-02-20T16:02:00.003+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan

2/20/2012 3:41 pm

Hey all,

I think I'll be in Almaty for about six months at most - so I figured I'd get acquainted where the people do their shopping and what people do for fun. I spent Sunday going to the bazaar, a couple of shopping malls and, squeezed in a Russian lunch with one of my dad's friends. And later on, I attempted to do a special Live from Kazakhstan podcast with Najman and Hae Sol Kang - it turned into a podcast remixed into dubstep.

UPDATE: IN THE FUTURE THEY PLAY DUBSTEP MUSIC IN THE SUPERMARKET.

Now I'm at the warehouse doing some more data entry and research. Kind of going crazy but at least I have some delicious coffee to hype me up...which I probably shouldn't be drinking...

Also found a specialty coffee roaster here in Almaty, 4A Coffee. Can't wait to check them out. I'm also going to get a tutor to teach me Russian. So, I'll actually learn how to say something other than Nyet, Spacyba and, Vodka. The vodka, by the way, is very hit, miss, or piss. - It's decent or tastes like corn syrup or tastes like it's been diluted with clear anti-freeze and you're dying with every sip.

So here are some photos from my shopping sorties in Almaty on Sunday. We hit the bazaar in the morning and the malls at night. There's nothing too special about the malls and I'll spend more time in them soon enough so I didn't take too many photos there. It's the bazaar I want you to see.

Also, unlike Uzbekistan they seem not to jive with the hip-hop game. Maybe they just don't give a fuck about anything American.

'Till next time,

Shaak.

Outside the Bazaar!

Here is how my day went:

Fresh produce, yo!

Enough steak to feed Najman.

Kimchi and other pickled deliciousness

Kumis.

Kumis from the Kumis wench?...

Fresh bread. Tandoori naan.

Squash. Such a beautiful golden yellow.

Variety is the spice of life.

Dried fruits and nuts.

More fresh and local produce.

You can buy this broom for about two bucks.
Also makes great torch when you ride your horse at night.

Outside section of the bazaar - clothes, hardware, anything really.

Liver, Kidneys, Tripe, Lungs, Hearts - They got what you crave.

Kazakh woven slippers.

No joke - this is ass. Lamb butt. gnarly shit.

My uncle chillin' with his soon to be buddy.

Dollz heads.

Lambz heads. Babushka watches her herd.

Like I said, sweet glorious meat.

Horse ribs - primarily used for Kazah, Kazakh sausage

Enough hippie herb shit for another Najman I know to probably smoke.

Mega Mall - Western Decadence at its finest.

I want to shit on this store so badly.

Had to get this macchiato to go. >:C Tasted like the 90s.

This jar of Nutella costs ten USD.

Baby, It's The Weekend

2012-02-18T17:46:00.001+06:00

Almaty, Kazakhstan
2/18/2012 6:51 am

So, I'm here in Kazakhstan. In what I'd like to say, Chillin' Like A Baws Apartment. Well, it is pretty nice. Still getting used to the living arrangements. I got the couch which turns into a bed. It's pretty dark outside right now. It's the black of night over here. For fuck's sake, it's nearly seven am over here and the sun has not risen. Seeing how my sleep schedule was all kinds of fucked back in New York, I think I've adjusted here pretty well thus far. However, I'll let time tell.

The temperature in Almaty is a little bit colder than it is in New York, with snow all over the ground. It feels good to experience a real winter in another country. You know, cause 2012 ain't got real winter for New York City. It's not the cold over here that bothers me, there seems to be this dust or smoke in the air that you know is bad for you in nearly every capacity. It is as if the earth is on fire underneath us and you can smell it in the air. There seems to be this proper mix of charcoal heating from old houses, new construction of apartment buildings and infrastructure to improve the city, and dust from the surrounding steppe that gets into the air for your precious lungs to breathe in and soak up. Fuck.

View from the apt. City of smoke & cranes.

This smoke/fog/air ain't fucking normal. Who lives like this? That was at 11:00 am

Yesterday, my first full day in Kazakhstan, was a mixed bag of half excitement, boredom, and jet lag. I found out my phone will not work here, the SIM card is way too small - Fuck you, Verizon! But it's ok, I got a nice phone here that's got some 90s SWAG (What was the equivalent to SWAG in the 90s?) I'll upload the photo when I get the chance.

Also, found out I'm in the "Queens" section of the city - the part where you can drive your car and public transportation is shitty but, you still live within city limits. And if that isn't something, the specific area I am living in is called the "Manhattan Project(s)." I love the name as it brings the idea of the U.S. atomic weapons project, that existed from the 1930s to the 1940s, to my mind. Living in the "Manhattan Project(s)" in Almaty, especially after leaving New York City, is just bizarre. O the irony!

Good morning from "Manhattan Project(s)"

Driving around Almaty has been an experience. I would not dare do it, not cause I still don't have a license but, there are no lanes of traffic. Over here in this part of the world, anything goes - if you think you can sandwich your car in between two others, you do it cause if you don't someone else will swivel through. Or, you don't do such a thing cause that's how you are going to get into a fucking car accident.

2/18/2012 4:26 pm

The warehouse that my dad has his auto parts business set up at is bizarre. Let's just say cs_assault and cs_office smashed each other and birthed out cs_kazakhstan.

I've been at the warehouse all day. I think we get to finish up soon. I just wanna chill at the apartment. But, we've got a guest tonight! My good ole' buddy, Yerlan. He's coming over for dinner and, I finally get to start diving into getting this coffee business. Yerlan is one of the people interested in starting a coffee business in Kazakhstan. He also is the project manager for the new mall that is being built out here in Almaty (THE ONE WITH SAKS FIFTH AVENUE).

Anyway, I won't have internet access at the "Manhattan Project(s)" so I might as well update the blog again and shout it out to my peeps. Enjoy the rest of your weekend people. I will try to enjoy my very first weekend here but, we'll see.

Miss you all. Enjoy the photos.

'Till next time,

Shaak.

CS_Kazakhstan

The ground - with its ice.

Another part of the complex, one of two warehouses.

Inside the dark warehouse...

Uhh...what?

En Route: Over Here to Over There

2012-02-18T11:35:00.000+06:00

Somewhere Over the Rainbow
2/16/2012 11:25 am

The first leg of my journey is about over. It's been an interesting trip thus far. Rather slow. Apparently, my flight is just above the Rhine River, bordering Belgium and Germany. But, our first destination is Frankfurt.

I could go for a pint. I could also go for coffee, which would be more sensible. The food on this flight is okay because it's airline food but, I've had worse. I won't say cause no one will even fly on one of their planes in any capacity. I think I'm going to hit someone if this plane doesn't land soon. I need fresh air, perhaps a dunkel or two, a nice comfortable breakfast and, a few smokes.

For the reference, it is 5:25 am in NYC. It will be around 3:00 or 4:00 pm Eastern Standard Time when I reach Almaty, Kazakhstan. Local time will be around 1:00 and 2:00 am respectively.

Well, i've just been told in German to turn off my computer! OK, it was in English but they are making announcements in both languages.

K BYE FOR NOW.

Somewhere Over Kazakhstan
2/17/2012 12:20 am

The second leg of my journey to Kazakhstan has been much better. Compared to the flight from New York to Frankfurt, the Frankfurt to Almaty flight feels like fucking velvet – just smooth and I say, it gives me pleasure. It’s not crowded like Phil’s mom for one thing. And that’s all I am pretty much concerned about. I got to sleep which has been great but, I think it is going to be hard to sleep once I land and arrive at the apartment.

Well, I hope it’s an apartment. For all intents and purposes it might be called an apartment but, it could be a yurt. That would be something out of Lemony Snicket though. I’m excited to have the weekend ahead of me once I get to Kazakhstan. Perhaps I get to go around and check things out. Maybe I go to Chocolate Disco, yes? Find 50 Cent and party in the club, yes?

Frankfurt airport was aight. At least they had one of those rooms with amazing ventilation for smokers. Ain’t that cray? Just imagine the relief one feels being able to do something and then perhaps feel some sort of shame or just being part of some voyeurist plot. My theory is that they feel bad about Hitler, so ever since they ever could, the Germans have been doing a crazy of a heck job to be a progressive state.

The beer on flight and in Frankfurt has been delicious. German brands that I never have had the pleasure to drink. Our inflight beer was Warsteiner, I imagine their flagship beer. Unfortunately there was no indication regarding what style it was! Our second encounter with German beer was with Bitburger – a pilsner I believe, it was crisp and refreshing and the right amount of bitters in the end.

Warsteiner!

Almost there. Time to land. Not sure how to feel about all this...

'Till next time,

Shaak.

D-Day: New York to Kazakhstan

2012-02-16T05:54:00.000+06:00

Queens, New York

2/15/2012 2:53 pm

I leave beautiful sweet New York for Kazakhstan in just a few hours. Not sure what to expect. At the moment, this whole venture is a mixed bag of feelings and thoughts. However, it will be an adventure.

My flight leaves just slightly after ten p.m. tonight from JFK with a brief stop in Frankfurt, Germany. Hopefully, I get to down a stein or two before beginning the second leg of my sixteen hour journey. As they say, beer is the bread of the masses, so I intend to load up. Well, I think that's what someone must have said at some point.

Well, back to packing.

2/15/2012 5:12 pm

Still here. Packing some more and more. Almost done. I feel like I am missing something. But, that always happens when I do the packing.

This is ourselves under pressure.

2/15/2012 6:24 pm

Just about packed. Cutting it close, I suppose. My family has this habit of unpacking everything I pack which may sound counterproductive but, after they are through there is space in every luggage piece to pack so much more. It's not that I'm a bad packer (I'm sure there is an innuendo in there), they just kill it on point.

I'm kind of nervous about my trip. I'm looking forward to it but, I have this feeling in my gut. I kind of thought that my life here in New York will be on pause but, I know life carries on. People die, babies are born, time moves on. It's pretty surreal being in another part of the world outside the United States during 2012.

I wonder what is going to change when I return to this place. I know I'll be able to get back into the daily grind of family and friends once I return - those are the people you need in your life, the ones that, no matter how far apart you are physically, you are able to connect to them and understand them and take off where you left. But, perhaps I should think about how I can change and not how people or things over here in New York can change in as little as six months.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

2/15/2012 6:52 pm

OK. Time to hit the shower and get the fuck to JFK! Onward to the future!

Godspeed, Spiderman.

'Till next time,

Shaak.