UglyCarpets

A Different Kind of Ugliness

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Wed, 24 Nov 2010 17:14:00 +0000

My dad, sister, brother, and former father-in-law all worked for airlines. I've been flying since I was 10. My children flew in utero. I love airplanes, airports, and flight. I even drink airport coffee. I have nothing but positive feelings about airports, mostly because they remind me of happy times with my dad. My favorite poem is even about flying. The TSA has shit all over this. I will not be going on another airplane anytime soon. I don't recognize my country today.

Yesterday evening, my fiance and I flew out of RDU, Terminal 2, on an American Airlines flight to Dallas. We are experienced travelers, so we have our carryons, boarding passes, and IDs ready for the security folks. After we get past the inital screener (very nice woman)--the one who checks your ID and scribbles on the boarding pass--we get into separate lines for the metal detector. I take off my shoes, pull out my laptop, etc., and go through the detector, no problem. I recollect my gear on the other side, and look to see where C is. He's over in the far right line, and has just come through the metal detector.

One of the TSA guys is talking to him intently, and C is shaking his head. I assume it's about the CPAP machine, which always causes us problems. I start to head over there, when I see the TSA guy take C over to a separate area and begin questioning him. I hightail it over there, pull out my camera, and start shooting video (no audio). Turns out that C. has opted out of the full-body scan, which was mandatory for everyone in that line. Since he has opted out, he will now be undergoing the "enhanced pat down." I am told that I can't be recording in that area, so I put my camera away and call my daughter, putting her on speakerphone so she can hear what's happening.

Two male TSA agents take C into to a frosted-glass cubicle nearby, which says "Fire Extinguisher" on the door. They do not allow me to go inside, but they ask him who I am. They are in there for about 5 minutes, at which point one of the agents comes out with something small in his hand, like a card. He takes it to a machine back over by the metal detector, and when he gets the result, he goes back in to the cubicle. I figured out later that they had tested C for explosives, which came back negative.

A minute or so later, the cubicle door opens again, and both agents step out. I go in, and C is putting his belt back on. I asked what was going on. C said "They put their fucking hands down my underwear." Then one of the agents came back in and asked to see my ID. When I asked why, he said it was because I had "interfered with their procedures." I said "I see," and handed him my boarding pass and driver's license. I asked him his name, and he said that he was Chris John, the supervisor in that section.

When he had gotten all of the information written down, he left the cubicle. I got off the phone with my daughter, and we left the cubicle.

I found out later from C that they had not explained what was going to happen, did not offer to have someone there as a witness, and put their hands inside the waistband of his underwear and ran them all along his body, after feeling all up his legs including the testicles.

This episode violated several policies/statements of the TSA:

* that you can have a person of your choice with you as a witness to the questioning/examination.
* that each step in the process must be explained before it occurs.
* that only a subset of passengers will undergo advanced screening (people who set off the metal detector alarm and a random subset of other passengers). Everyone in C's line had to go through the scanner or undergo groping. My line didn't have to do either.
* that "TSA does not prohibit the public, passengers or press from photographing, videotaping or filming at security checkpoints, as long as the screening process is not interfered with or slowed down." That they collected MY information "because I interfered with their procedures" was strong-arm intimidation, plain and simple.
* that they placed their hands against his bare skin, inside his underwear, to test for explosives is sexual assault. Period. This is not an "enhanced pat-down." From the TSA Web site:

"The explosive trace sampling process may require you to lift or raise some of your clothing in order to obtain the explosive trace sample. (Sampling areas can be accessed by you lifting your pant leg or shirtsleeve or by raising your skirt to knee-level.)"

If you must fly, arm yourselves with knowledge, my friends. Review http://www.tsa.gov/travelers/airtravel/specialneeds/editorial_1567.shtm, http://www.tsa.gov/travelers/pat_downs.shtm, and other sites for info.

What I'm most afraid of now is that both of us have been placed on some list that guarantees we'll be "screened" for the rest of our lives. I used to be afraid of the IRS. Now I'm afraid of the TSA. Congratulations, terrorists.

Marriott Wardman, Washington DC

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 13:00:00 +0000

AKA, the Swirly Hotel. Think the Olympics figure skating team practices their compulsories here?

Trust me, this is not what you want to see at 2 am, stumbling back to your room. You could be lost forever.

Omni Shoreham, Washington DC

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 13:00:00 +0000

All right, so I fell down on the job for awhile. It's summer--what can I say?

Anyway, here's a hotel to set your teeth on edge. Enjoy!
---
This doesn't look so bad, right? But wait, there's more...

Trust me, this is not what you want to see at 2 am, stumbling back to your room. You could be lost forever.

I do have to admit that this is a better choice for the morning after. Calm, subdued, gentle. Then someone talks to you and it's all over.

Carmike Wynnsong Theater, Durham

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

It doesn't do you much good to have *seven* people behind the concessions counter if only ONE of them is operating the cash register. Just saying.

In other news, Toy Story 3 made me cry, as usual.

Smart Carpet: Lifesaver or "Big Brother"?

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

Imagine a carpet that can track your every hop, skip, and jump (or fall, as the case may be). Are you excited, or creeped out?

Consider the possibilities. Your car could both recognize you and mold the seat to your saved custom settings. If your child or an elderly friend falls, the carpet could sound an alarm. To turn on the lights, you might simply touch the "smart wallpaper." Heating, cooling, and lighting systems could be programmed to operate only when someone is in a room, saving thousands of dollars and helping the environment.

Then there are the other, less benign possible applications. Of course these carpets would be a logical choice for places needing high security, but there's nothing stopping employers from using it to track employees' movements throughout the day. Hell, if they provide you the right kind of lab coat, they can monitor your heart rate, temperature, and respirations remotely. Possible new performance metrics?

At least three companies, the U.S. military, and several universities are developing "smart textiles" for these and other applications, so stay tuned. And walk lightly.

Plantation Cafe and Deli, Hilton Head

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

I love places where the waitress calls you "Baby," and you're older than she is. Classic.

Marriott Vacation Club International (Grande Ocean), Hilton Head

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

The condos were bigger than my first apartment. Talk about culture shock, especially compared with Ocracoke.

The hallway:

The room:

Charter House, Hilton Head

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Tue, 20 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

These guys served me the best meal I've had in years. The psychedelic carpet was just a bonus.

Try the prime rib, and tip your server.

Invisible Flying Carpets: One Step Closer

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

We've previously reported on "carpet cloaks," whereby light is directed away from an object, masking it from view. Well, they've gone one better now: invisible HOVERING carpets.

In the May issue of Optics Express, researchers in the UK and France propose a model for developing circular, levitating carpets under which objects can be hidden in either air or water. The model builds on previous work describing "invisibility carpets for infinite conducting planes and cylinders" and takes it in a different direction, namely, anisotropy-led rather than plasmonic-type cloaking. (But of course!)

Using some frankly intimidating mathematics, Diatta and colleagues show that this model might be applied to hiding objects from sonar and shielding parabolic antennas from interference, among other applications.

"Interestingly, all these carpets are described by non-singular parameters." Uh, if you say so. I just think it's cool.

Full text article is here (pdf). The research was funded by the Engineering and Physical Sciences Research Council (UK).

O2 Fitness, Cole Place, Carrboro

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

Can you imagine a more depressing place to exercise? The faux-hardwoods aren't helping, either. So much for a "welcoming, motivating and clean environment."
Submitted by an anonymous fat burner.

Nantucket Cafe, Rams Plaza, Chapel Hill

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

Come on, guys. You have great food--you deserve a nice carpet to go with it.

Amelie's, NoDa, Charlotte

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

A 24-7 bakery as good as Amelie's deserves better than this old rag!

Ikea, Charlotte

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

If I wanted this boring old thing, I could have gone to Harris Teeter. At least H-T doesn't have 15 product recalls going on right now.

Harris Teeter, Providence Road, Charlotte

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 13:00:00 +0000

Add interesting carpet" to the shopping list, boys.

Mediterranean Deli, Chapel Hill

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

We close out the month with this restaurant, which has great food but silly carpet.

And I'm not sure it's a good idea to put carpet under the soda machine, either.

Starbucks, Durham

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

This is what the Yuppie Cracker Barrel(TM) looks like, folks.

A Bale of a Tale

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

(We interrupt the usual sarcasm to give you an example of Something Going Right with carpet.)

A recycled carpet fiber typically used to prevent erosion at construction sites is being used to minimize damage to beaches caused by the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.

After finding tar balls washing up on the beaches along the Topsail Hill (Florida) State Preserve, Walton County crews set up nearly half a mile of "Green Type 4 belted silt retention" fencing and lined it with GeoHay to reduce additional contamination.

GeoHay is a filtering material made from 100% recycled carpet fibers. It's very absorbent, reusable, and nonbiodegradable. Check out this (admittedly, promotional) video of GeoHay bales in action:

At the moment, beaches remain open at Topsail Hill. I wonder how long that will be true elsewhere along the Gulf?

Food Lion, Avon NC

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

So there I was, thinking that all Food Lions had the same "carpet", based on this post and this post. I didn't think I'd need to take a picture of the one in Avon. Well slap my face and call me Sally.

Ocracoke Health Center

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

It's a bitch to have a yeast infection while you're on vacation, is all I'm saying.

Hatteras Movies 4 Avon

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

Saw the A-Team movie (again) here, when I wasn't being distracted by the carpet. Somewhere, a 1958 davenport is missing its cover.

Mad Hatter's Bakeshop, Durham

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

Yes, folks, it's cruelty-free, organic, free-range, no-gluten carpet grown from selected shade trees in Nicaragua, topped with various drizzlings of coffee, tea, and fresh tropical juices. That'll be $1000/sq ft.

Submitted by an anonymous cheese-eater.

In Search of More Ugliness for You

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

UglyCarpets will be on vacation this week, but we're always hard at work on our continuing mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go ... er, sorry about that--got carried away. We'll keep an eye out for fugly floor coverings, is all.

See you next week!

Tile vs. Carpet: Consumers, Be Aware

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

"Context Effects from Bodily Sensations: Examining Bodily Sensations Induced by Flooring and the Moderating Role of Product Viewing Distance"

Yup, that's the title of the journal article. And right about now, you're probably saying to yourself, um, UglyCarpets, what in the name of Dupont does this have to do with the price of Febreeze? "Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up."

It seems to matter whether we consumers are standing on a forgiving surface rather than a hard surface when making buying decisions. When we're standing on a surface we perceive as "comforting"--carpet, for example--we tend to judge nearby products as relatively less comforting than those farther away. But when we stand on a hard surface such as vinyl tile, the converse is true: the discomfort we feel from standing on a fatiguing surface translates into judging nearby products as relatively more comforting.

Given that the effect appears to diminish when moving either closer to (in the case of carpet) or farther away from products (in the case of tile floors), it might be worth going to a neutral area for a couple of minutes before deciding you need to buy that case of cotton balls at Wal*Mart.

Orange County Speedway, Rougemont

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Thu, 10 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

This technically isn't a carpet, just painted concrete, but I couldn't resist. Go for the races, stay for the bologna burgers. No, really.

Orange County Recording Office, Hillsborough

noreply@blogger.com (pfflyernc) — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 13:00:00 +0000

This is the department that handles marriage licenses, business name certificates, and other documents needed to pursue your dreams. And nightmares, apparently.