Life's like that

Why all women need not be overachievers

2013-05-21T06:22:00.000-04:00

Before going any further - I am all for women who are ambitious. So there's no debate needed on that. My problem is with women's movements that focus completely on how women "should be" ambitious, how women are "not doing enough", why women should "aim higher" and yada yada. Specially a plethora of literature of late focusses on how we must catch up with the men, how we should not let go of opportunities in favor of family etc. It just leaves me more fatigued than energized.

Don't get me yet? Read the latest bestseller - Lean-in. For some reason, I wasn't convinced about the messaging in the book. Maybe it is just me but I don't buy this propaganda about pushing ourselves to be ambitious on every turn. That's the first red flag on your way to stress-ville. And it just got worser when it became women specific (it is quite clear that on average, women have more responsibilities in most households than men do). All that argument to be treated as equals with men, in my opinion, is now being abused and creating more stressful conditions for working women.

I understand where this is coming from - there are still plenty of women facing equal opportunity issues at work. I don't deny that. And so far as this movement is aimed at helping women realize their strengths and moving forward, I am all for it. The problem comes when it conflicts with family and personal health.

When did we last have fun and do something just because we enjoyed it?

When did we last sleep a full 8-9 hours without anything about work/personal issues on mind?

When did we last prioritize family over work or other personal pursuits?

In short, when did we women, last feel like a human and less of a robot?

As it is being a woman, and supporting family and kids and doing a great job at work should get us gold stars.

So in this context I want to ask the Sheryl Sandbergs of the world who are hell-bent on "doing it all" - "Why isn't being good enough, good enough?" Going after something and pushing ourselves is a matter of personal choice. If that works for some, that's good. If that doesn't work for some, that's good too.

An average working woman might not have the money nor the inclination to put her child in a day care. She (hopefully) loves her children as much as she loves her work. And she wants her time to be divided equally. Nothing wrong with that. It is that tad little thing called balance and women are hardwired for it. Making compromises is not necessarily bad either, if you know what you want. And in such cases it is a healthy choice to make. Not all of us have supporting partners, families or kids - so it is quite clear that every woman's life is distinct and doesn't need to revolve around maximizing career prospects.

Instead of recognizing the already fantastic jobs that women do, we suggest she start focussing on work & career (regardless of whether she wants it or not) and put herself up as a leader. I want to ask - is being a mother less of a leader? Is rearing a family a chore? Some women find meaning in taking care of their family. They want to spend time with parents, spouse and kids, they want to keep their home happy, healthy and joyful. They are celebrating life just like other women who love their lives in a high flying corporate job. And there is nothing wrong with either. It is a personal choice we make.

Women shouldn't feel less of a leader if they are not overachievers or ambitious. Like anyone else - men or women - they should aim to do what makes them happy. It serves as a good reminder that life is not a competition, it is a celebration. If being good enough makes women happy, so be it. If living a contented life and doing meaningful work and investing in family is what women like to do, so be it.

So to all the women out there, I want to tell you this - You are doing a great job!

Because guess what is the single most important leadership job (performed under incredible pressure and constraints and the most hard to perfect)? Its motherhood.

Get busy living or get busy surviving

2013-05-18T14:10:00.001-04:00

Yes, I know that line from Shawshank Redemption. But wait, there is probably a more horrible thing than death - the act of surviving. Because honestly you or me or anyone who is alive has no idea of what death really means. Maybe few of us do. But that's just that.

We go through our daily grind trying to survive. This is what we call the "busy work". What can be worser use of our time on earth than that?

Each of us are capable of so much more valuable stuff - but we are getting busy - surviving. We create the false hope that someday we will break free and build a life we want. We assure ourselves, every single day of our lives this: It takes only so much saving up of money, or sacrificing love or time with family and friends. But we miserably fail to get out of that rabbit hole we have dug for ourselves.

What are we afraid of? Why only so few people inhabiting this world, have the courage and willpower to be honest with themselves?

Many times it is that job you don't want to quit, the marriage you are trying to keep afloat, the society you don't want to offend. Who are these fictional people and why does their importance vaporize when you are faced with death?

What does it really take to follow your passion? Or make your days exciting? Or appreciate the beauty around you? Or live in the moment and forget about retirement?

What's stopping you? What's terrifying you?

This is because we are taught and drilled into our heads again and again that wealth, status and fame are the only "values" worth living for. Everything else, well, we have no place for that. And suddenly just like that happiness evades us, because we are in a mad pursuit of such shallow values. We are constantly bitter about things around us that we fail to embrace who we are and of what unique things we are capable of.

You live only once and for that you owe yourself an explanation about why you are busy surviving and not busy living, creating wonderful things.

Movie Recommendation: The Great Dictator (by Charlie Chaplin)

2013-05-17T13:19:00.000-04:00

Note: Ok, after a dose of Chaplin movies, I can honestly say - How the hell did I miss his movies? They are incredible! Each one of them. But this one stands out on its own. The Great Dictator is a genius satire on the Nazi era - only Chaplin can combine comedy with an intense subject like that. This is what cinema should be like! Available on YouTube here (yay!)

IMDB Entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0032553/
Genre: Comedy, Drama

This movie is laugh-out-loud, poignant, sad - all rolled into one. You take a serious topic - as intense as the holocaust and the anti-Semitism - and turn it into a political satire/comedy? Well, who but Chaplin can put a fictional spin to it and delight us with a such a piece of art! This is the greatest risk ever taken by a filmmaker in my opinion (the movie was released when the Nazis were in prominence and during World War II!)

Chaplin stars in a dual role as a bumbling Jewish barber and a ruthless dictator (a direct satire on Hitler). After returning from war (World War I), the Jewish barber is admitted into a hospital and loses memory of the war. He is released from the hospital during the time when Jews are persecuted, only to be mistaken as the dictator himself (due to his resemblance to the dictator)

The best part of the movie? The impassioned and powerful speech given by the Jewish barber at the end of the movie. And just for that, this movie should be elevated to the status of a cult classic.

The Speech in words:

I'm sorry but I don't want to be an emperor.

That's not my business.

I don't want to rule or conquer anyone.

I should like to help everyone: Jew, gentile, black man, white.

We all want to help one another.

Human beings are like that.

We want to live by each other's happiness, not misery.

We don't want to hate one another.

In this world, the good earth is rich and can provide for everyone.

The way of life can be free and beautiful but we have lost the way.

Greed has poisoned men's souls, has barricaded the world with hate, has goose-stepped us into bloodshed.

We have developed speed but have shut ourselves in.

Machinery has left us in want.

Our knowledge has made us cynical, our cleverness, hard and unkind.

We think too much and feel too little.

More than machinery we need humanity.

More than cleverness we need kindness and gentleness.

Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost...

The airplane and radio have brought us closer.

These inventions cry out for the goodness in man, cry out for universal brotherhood, for the unity of us all.

Even now my voice is reaching millions, millions of despairing men, women and children, victims of a system that makes men torture and imprison innocent people.

To those who can hear me I say, do not despair.

The misery upon us is but the passing of greed, the bitterness of men who fear the way of human progress.

The hate of men will pass, and dictators die, and the power they took will return to the people.

So long as men die liberty will never perish.

Soldiers, don't give yourselves to brutes, men who despise you, enslave you, regiment your lives, tell you what to think and feel, who drill you, treat you like cattle and use you as cannon fodder.

Don't give yourselves to these men, machine men with machine minds and machine hearts.

You are not machines, you are not cattle, you are men! You have the love of humanity in you.

Don't hate. Only the unloved and the unnatural hate.

Soldiers, don't fight for slavery, fight for liberty! St Luke says, "The Kingdom of God is within man." Not in one man nor a group of men, but in all men. In you! You have the power to create machines, the power to create happiness.

You have the power to make this life free and beautiful, to make this life a wonderful adventure.

In the name of democracy, let us use that power.

Let us all unite, let us fight for a new world, a world that will give men a chance to work, that will give youth a future and old age security.

Promising these things, brutes have risen.

But they lie! They do not fulfill that promise. They never will! Dictators free themselves but they enslave the people. Now let us fight to fulfill that promise! Let us fight to free the world, to do away with national barriers, to do away with greed, with hate and intolerance.

Let us fight for a world of reason, a world where science and progress will lead to the happiness of all. Soldiers, in the name of democracy, let us unite!

Movie Recommendation: Okuribito (Departures)

2013-05-05T02:40:00.000-04:00

Note: If you are in a mood to reflect on life, death and family and relationships, this is it. This movie is available on YouTube (yay!) with English subtitles.

IMDB entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1069238/
Genre: Drama, Family, Japanese

Jumping right in. This is the story of an unemployed cello player Diago, who leaves Tokyo and returns to his hometown to find himself a job. He mistakes an ad in the local paper for a job in a travel agency only to find out later that the job is of a "Nokanshi" or NK agent - a professional who prepares deceased bodies for funeral. He is despised by his wife and friends for taking up such a forbidden job. But in this job Diago finds himself, reconciles with his dad and understands the true meaning of life, relationships and death.

Before I continue, a fair warning that this movie can be slow in parts - but rightly so. It is only by taking time to reflect you tend to appreciate both the beauty and sorrow in life. This movie is in the same genre as Akira Kurosawa's "Ikiru" - a poignant reflection on the meaning of life when you watch death in the face. This is also a story of loss and how painful it is to realize you no longer have that privilege to spend life's cherished moments with your loved ones.

The movie has a soulful background score that elevates the mood in the story. There is also plenty of good old-fashioned humor (specially in the first half of the movie). The movie also uncovers some of the deepest Japanese beliefs and customs on the after life of the departed. I was really surprised by the whole notion of a life after death and how the deceased are carefully prepared for a peaceful journey after death in Japanese tradition. Unlike movies that deal with death with a lot of melodrama, this one is a lot more subtle and less cliched.

The movie also explores in part Daigo's own battle with returning to his origins and his despise for his dad who left him and his mother when he was young. In life we always hold a lifetime grudge and cant reconcile with it, and yet we realize that to forgive and let go of the past is the only way to free ourselves. The movie benefits from some of the fine acting by the cast, stunning direction and beautiful depiction of relationships.

Only in Japan, even a death ritual can be a form of art. The more I see and learn about Japanese culture, the more I am inclined to believe how rich and traditional their culture is. We have all lost or remember someone whom we love and miss and this movie is a tribute to those who have left us. A reminder that life is not all about ourselves, but also the beautiful and long lasting relationships we form.

How to find fulfilling work

2013-05-04T10:11:00.000-04:00

"Where the needs of the world and your talents cross, there lies your vocation" - Aristotle

Because finding fulfilling work is a bit like finding a lover...

Movie Recommendation: The Kid (by Charlie Chaplin)

2013-04-27T01:18:00.002-04:00

Note: Got 50 mins? Never seen a Charlie Chaplin movie? Want to see a silent movie? Ever seen a dramedy or don't know one? Got kids and want to watch a movie with them? Then this is the movie to watch! It is available on YouTube here

IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0012349/

Genre: Drama, Comedy, Children, Family

I am not sure what took me so long to watch full length Charlie Chaplin movies. Perhaps the stereotype that it is more suited for kids? Or his buffoonery is not for the mature? Or just that Black & White silent movies are not really the trend today. Whatever it was, I am happy I am not under that spell anymore. Because Charlie Chaplin my friends, is a cinematic genius. To really appreciate the dark humor you must watch his movies - trust Chaplin to mix melancholy with slapstick so beautifully. He might as well be called the Father of Dramedy.

More about the movie now. The opening credits roll: "A comedy with a smile and perhaps a tear"

Now that I have seen this movie, couldn't sum it up better! The movie follows the story of an unwanted baby that is found near a garbage can by a tramp (Chaplin). After unsuccessful attempts to get rid of the baby, Chaplin decides to adopt him (calls him John). Chaplin and his son lead a life of poverty masked by strokes of humor that can only happen in a Chaplin movie - dodging a local policeman, getting into street fights, pulling pranks, running on the rooftops etc. For a moment you forget they are tramps - they don't live comfortable lives. The story takes a turn when the kid's biological mother discovers him and the authorities take him away. What will happen to Chaplin and the kid? Will they get back together again?

I don't know who did the role of the kid or what became of him (it is a 1921 movie, none of our parents were even close to being born at the time), he was nothing short of a great actor. There is an endearing scene where the kid is twisted away from Chaplin and the kid breaks into tears. It was just heartbreaking to watch, specially with the kid acting it out so damn well. That too in a silent movie. Remarkable!

The movie runs barely an hour. Yes, we have seen Chaplin's comedy routines as the bumbling tramp in bits and pieces. But have we watched a full length feature where he also plays a serious role? Nope. For all the lame stuff we pedal to our kids these days, this movie is a far better choice. Do a favor, grab this movie and watch it with your kids - they will love it to pieces.

It is obvious that I am hook, line and sinker for Chaplin after this movie - The Kid is Chaplin's master stroke. If you haven't watched it yet, you should ask yourself - why haven't you?

Five things: My favorite five movies on food

2013-04-24T09:27:00.001-04:00

My favorite five movies on food. Go!

5. Julie & Julia

A witty, feel-good parallel between lives of Julia Child and Julie Powell with a near mystique ending - will Julie be able to cook through 365 dishes of Julia Child, successfully?

Nora Ephron (the director), synonym with romantic comedies and food - what's not to love about that combination? Plus, Meryl Streep impersonating the legendary chef Julia Child (btw what a perfect last name to complement her child like enthusiasm for food) and Amy Adams (come on who doesn't smile when they look at her?) are top reasons to check out this movie. And of course makes you wonder how all that butter is not making the French any fatter? (My only pet peeve with this movie - it tends to drag in parts)

A word of caution: Eat before you see this movie. It is going to make you hungry.

4. Chocolat

Johnny Depp, romance, lots of chocolate. Go figure.

3. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

A poor boy by name Charlie, wins a ticket to tour the craziest candy factory in the world! Now that premise itself should feel intriguing no? It's successor - Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - is good too but that would be an overdose of Johnny Depp (or maybe that's what you like? Then go for it). Anyway the whole deal about getting lucky and winning that ticket to magic chocolate land sounds so feel-good, if you ask me. We want the underdog to win after all :) And then their is this deal about whether Charlie will win himself a lifetime supply of Wonka chocolate - keeps you guessing. A great movie to watch, specially with kids:)

2. Ratatouille

I am yet to meet someone who doesn't like Ratatouille - can't say that about most of the movies. This movie makes me want to eat Ratatouille and brings an honest chuckle when I eat one. Remy the rat, winning over Anton Ego, the critic draws me to a feverish crescendo, every single time I watch the movie. And just as inspiring: Remember, anybody can cook!

One phrase that sums up the reason for loving this movie -

"soul food".

1. Eat Drink Man Woman

Yes sir, we have a foodie movie from our beloved, Life of Pi famous Ang Lee. Revolves around a family in Taipei (a chef and his three daughters), their dinner ritual and coming together to face ups and downs in their lives. This movie craftily uses food as a metaphor - sour, sweet, spice, bitter - for the different experiences in life. Watch it and savor it again and again, just like your favorite dish:)

Wait, there are other favorite ones too! Jiro Dreams of Sushi, Tampopo...but some other time:) Although, come to think of it, any favorites in Indian movies? Rajesh Khanna's Bawarchi and Bachchan's Cheeni Kum comes to mind. I haven't seen the more recent Luv Shuv Tey Chicken Khurana. Really, that's it for Bollywood?

Bon Appetit!

Tiny Treats: Crepes

2013-04-21T03:10:00.001-04:00

For some time in the past I had been obsessed by crepes. To the extent that I scoured local places for creperies. So after a long time when I made it to a creperie recently, I relived this psycho-obsession.

But first, let me tell you how I pronounced it "cray-pay" when I was first introduced to it. Although I have gotta hand it over to another amateur who read it "creep". Haha.

So I haven't ever visited France to familiarize with an authentic crepe. But I can say this creperie (Lucinda Truck) at Grove Street, New Jersey was the best I have eaten. Their veggie crepe was to die for. I mean I could live there all my life just so I can get a bite at their crepes. Priced at a modest 5$ (and large portions!), I think they won my heart, stomach and mind over. (According to Yelp, this location has been closed down. *Gasp*)

The recent visit I made was dicey, on the other hand. This was a Palo Alto joint called Crepevine.

The first order I made was for a Sunset Crepe. Their fancy name for the basic Nutella, Banana and Strawberry Crepe. It came with a scoop of vanilla ice cream, whipped cream and chocolate syrup garnish. Now you cant go wrong with such a basic one. Glad to note, they got that right. At $7.5 it was delectable, fulfilling and comfort snack at best. And for hours thereafter, I kept dreaming about going back to eat another one of them.

The second time I went I was really hungry. So hungry I could turn into a cannibal and eat a human being. This time I was ready to devour a savory crepe. My personal favorite has always been a smoked salmon (without cream cheese please!), but I gave that a pass this time because my significant other isn't really into ANY kind of seafood (sad, but true). And so I made the rookie mistake of ordering an Indian fusion crepe. Really, who orders an Indian inspired dish at an all-American joint? Yeah, that should be me.

Like I said, I was too hungry. And you are bound to fail on an empty stomach.

Bombay, they called it. Hmm, ok. It came with the soggiest fries I ever had and a salad drenched in heavy dressing that I felt I was drinking out of a bottle of Hidden Valley.

Congratulations, you just made an already mediocre crepe worser. I mean, did I ask you to make a "meal" out of it? (What is this, McDonalds?). All I asked was a crepe - that salad and fries just ruined it. And to annoy me to no end, they splattered a big teaspoon of god-knows-what-curry-paste on top of the crepe. The appearance of it not the least bit appetizing. The crepe itself tasted like mud (yes, I have tasted mud, so I know).

And with that, it put a dent into my crepe obsession, for now. Although, full props to the chalkboard inspired menu display there. Very creative!

That's why there is a reason why it is believed that a best restaurant is one carrying a consistent taste in their dishes. Of course, there is another valuable lesson to be learnt here - Never shop or dine on an empty stomach. You almost always regret later.

Movie Recommendation: Le Ballon Rouge (The Red Balloon)

2013-04-13T02:36:00.000-04:00

Note: I was specifically looking for a movie that would warm my heart - this one seemed like a custom fit. Thank you Hulu Plus!

IMDB Entry: Le Ballon Rouge

Genre: Children, French

As a kid growing up in an average India middle class family, my source of entertainment (TV/movies) was the national television channel in India - Doordarshan :) Needless to say, I didn't really have a broad exposure to classic children's movies at the time (I think we made do with cartoons then?). Now I wish I had seen a movie, such as this one, then.

The good news is it is available to watch on YouTube (yay to Internet!):

The Red Balloon is a funny, simple story of a red balloon (duh!) that is rescued by a little boy. The balloon dotes on the boy and follows him everywhere through the streets of Paris (to his school, church etc.) and they seem to form a bond that is the envy of the local kids. The kids get fascinated and want to destroy the balloon when it seems impossible to rip it apart from its owner (welcome to the real world! when you cant have it, destroy it). The climax is heartbreaking but also uplifting at the same time.

The camera work is exquisite. I am not familiar with Parisian streets, but it looks like the movie captures a very picturesque 1950's Paris - cobblestone streets, narrow alleys, victorian balconies, old school staircases, little bakeries with delectable pastries and baguettes. The kid - main protagonist in the movie - is charming and effortlessly carries the film with almost no dialogs spoken in the movie. The movie has a background score that brings out the mood in the film. The movie flows like an adventure - very well deserved Oscar for the screenplay. This movie is definitely a treat to watch - and a masterpiece for short movie making connoisseurs.

This movie is definitely recommended for young children (and as well for adults if you are looking for a short feel good film). It stands as a metaphor for hope, love, loyalty and devotion - something we rarely find these days. It is a little reminder that life is all about tiny treats. As kids, we hold on to some things dearly and never let go. Our devotion and love is genuine. It almost melts your heart to see the boy's mother throw the balloon out of the window but the balloon hangs in the air, by the side of the balcony, waiting for the little boy to reclaim it. I think that does dig up our own fond memories of things we possessed as a kid :)

This movie is like eating a warm toasted bread with melted butter on top. Now, who doesn't like that?:)

Movie Recommendation: The Hidden Fortress

2013-04-12T07:25:00.000-04:00

Note: The movie that inspired George Lucas's Star Wars. Enough said.

IMDB Entry: The Hidden Fortress

Genre: Adventure, Action, Drama, Japanese

Well, by now most of you know my addiction to Kurosawa's creations. See here for an initial list of my Kurosawa favorites. Since then I have almost (yes, I am agonizingly close to seeing all of Kurosawa's movies. What am I going to do after that?) seen all of his movies. And it is just too hard to pick a best one from the lot. But Hidden Fortress was like fresh air to me (I haven't been watching movies for a long time now). Ok, enough of my banter.

The movie follows two greedy (and somewhat gullible) peasants who help a man and a woman cross the enemy lines to a friendly province. The peasants don't realize they are the General and Princess (the last of the Ayizuki clan) gone undercover, with a reward on their heads. The General plans the escape route tricking the enemies at every step while the bumbling peasants turn out to be more trouble than help.

The movie is a visual treat like most of Kurosawa's creations - sweeping panoramas and amazing landscapes in frame after frame. However, the comedy in the movie came to me as a surprise. Comedy in Kurosawa's movie, really? I a'int complaining. An epic adventure with humor - what's not to love about it? By now, I have a deep admiration for most of Kurosawa's camera techniques, specially long lens shots of battles and duels. Although Hidden Fortress isn't an all-out samurai movie per se, it has some stunning shots of action - the scene between the General and his arch nemesis is so well shot, I had to rewind it and watch a couple of times to savor it fully. Take a look at the chase scene that leads to a duel between them. The long lens panning of the camera is unheard of for a movie in 1950's!

While there is plenty of adventure (journey through the mountains, digging up gold, setting up traps/escape strategies), the film still explores the deep philosophy of Kurosawa i.e What makes humans happy? Greed? Friendship and loyalty? Trust? Scenes where the Princess first finds herself face to face with poverty and ugliness of human's mind are well-shot. This movie is set in feudal Japan and there is an intense class structure and divide that might be a little new to the Western audience.

It is simply an honor to watch Kurosawa's movies. Hidden Fortress is one such gem. Take a bow!

Looking back: Go Cherry Blossoms!

2013-03-02T14:24:00.000-05:00

March is a somewhat of a "nobody" month. I mean really January is when you set resolutions for the year, Feb you fret over them and then comes March. And everything seems to vaporize. Including the month. No holidays either. Ok, we got Women's Day there. But what else. Anyone?

And then today, March reminds me of the impromptu trip I made to Brooklyn Botanical Gardens on one such dull day. Those days I was quite the early riser - 6 am on a Saturday. No joke. Rising early felt like I had so much time at hand! So yeah, got into my jeans and a light t-shirt and trotted from one subway train to another to reach the beautiful gardens.

Let me forewarn you - I am not even remotely a "flower" person. Yes I know what you are thinking. What a thing to brag about huh? I had nothing much to do that day so I thought "Well let's check out this hype about cherry blossoms. They are pink and white. So what? Meh." And so I was there, waiting even before the gates to the esplanades opened - 9 am was opening time.

Boy was I wrong, and how wrong! Let me just say - Brooklyn Botanical Gardens was GORGEOUS! If you have never seen or smelled or walked down a Cherry Blossom esplanade, you couldn't imagine the joy. And that coming from me is ahem, a huge thing. So you got to take my word on it.They apparently have some sort of popular Rose show/display too.

And what better than the cool spring air to break the New York winter season. Felt right out of a Hollywood rom-com.

Apparently Cherry Blossom festivals go by the name Sakura Matsuri (Japanese), so I bumped into several ladies in cute kimonos and umbrellas.

They had a cool lounge and all for family and kids at the entrance. Yeah lot of emoticons!

And before I could enter the esplanade something interesting caught my eye. You see the tree wrapping round that wooden roof? That is a type of Weeping Willow Tree that naturally bends over. I just thought it added so much charm to that roof.

And now...

*Blows Trumpets*

The Cherry Blossom Esplanade. What a sight!

Umm, although not sure what this was about...perhaps a suggestive restroom sign? Pardon my ignorance if this signifies something more important.

But of course, there were fashion models and photo shoots happening at random places. This is New York after all! She looked kinda angelic. I took this one stealthily ;-)

And then there were some genuine candid shots :-)

And of course, the gardens had their fair share of tulips too. Poor man's Seattle?

And one of those pools where you toss coins for luck. They seem to be everywhere I go in NYC, makes me think it is either some kind of scam or just a feel-good thing for tensed New Yorkers.

Next stop: The Japanese Gardens!

Just walking through this landscape felt so zen-like. Just makes me want to take the next flight to Kyoto

More Blossoms (white) and red ferns!

Of course, for those who wanted some activities, there were plenty happening - too many to pick.

A guy on a hot spring day demonstrating Origami to an equally inquisitive audience. Loved it. Made a duck. Almost. *Smiles sheepishly*

Then attended a traditional Japanese tea ceremony. It was done with, umm, so much precision. Almost meditative and relaxing to watch it. I had to climb over a hill top to see this (damn NY crowd!).

And lots of serious board games and Sudoku challenges happened.

Although, I wonder what these guys were up to? Specially the girl who is giving me the menacing look.

And then there were more artists! And more color!

Hmm. I could go on. I hopefully captured all the awesomeness of the gardens and the vibe of the festival. Never in my life I saw so much color at one place (ok maybe Holi :-)). So finally I did come out feeling bright and cheery. Not another dull March day after all :-)

PS: If you are ever in New York City this time of the year, this is a must do. Brooklyn Botanical Gardens is like a mini Disneyland. Lots of trees, flowers, gardens, rock structures, conservatories, art installations etc. I covered ~30% of it. I wish I hadn't been so skeptical in the first place. Too bad I moved out of the city and made no time for repeat visits :(

Lesson learnt: When in doubt, just go for it!

Movie recommendation: The Essential Akira Kurosawa movies - Volume I

2013-02-24T03:37:00.000-05:00

First an introduction to the Japanese legend Akira Kurosawa, one of the pioneers of cinematic excellence. His movies are not your average cinema. This is the compelling kind of cinema - the kind you go back to, again and again. So when Hulu opened up their criterion collection for free viewing on President's Day weekend, I lapped it up. One after another. Like an hungry audience ready to feast. What heaven!

Seven Samurai was my first introduction as a kid to Kurosawa's prolific cinema and storytelling. My dad grunts in disgust whenever Sholay is aired on television and for a good reason - Sholay was inspired from the Magnificent Seven which was in turn a remake of Kurosawa's Seven Samurai. So like all conosseiurs of original cinema, he could never really get around liking Sholay. Of course, there is no comparison with Seven Samurai - it is one of the most legit samurai epics every made.

Finding Kurosawa's early works from 1950's and 60's was tough then. But not any more, thanks to criterion and modern day video streaming! I relished four of the best Kurosawa creations and many more to go. There is really no dearth of reviews on his movies; undoubtedly classics and the stuff of the legends. So this is just a teeny overview of the massive impression his movies have had on me.

Seven Samurai (1954)

IMDB entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0047478

Genre: Action, Adventure, War

Seven Samurai is an adventure-warrior movie set in a village of peasants who hire seven samurai to defend their village from bandits. This movie was the lethal combination of groundbreaking camera work (much ahead of its time) and an intense storytelling (frame after frame) that resulted in a 3.5 hour epic cinema. This movie has all elements going for it - incredible story, technique, characters, well executed battle scenes, story of honor, trust and adversity and at the top of it all, a movie with a soul. You can find influences of this movie in so many Western movies (too many to list). If you want to ever buy a DVD for your life, this should be it. This is required viewing. This is cinematic gold.

Yojimbo (1961)

IMDB entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0055630/

Genre: Action, Adventure, Drama

So if you haven't had enough of samurai dose (how can you anyway?), another classic is Yojimbo (Japanese for bodyguard). A samurai comes to a town in strife and ripped apart by two resident gangs who fight each other. He plays them against each other to get rid of them and free the town of bad elements. Yojimbo is entertaining from the word go! A lot of elements and style in the Western movies - like a long lens shot of a cowboy, taut and skillful action scenes and visuals seem to be picked up from this movie. It is entertaining to watch as the story unfolds, as the samurai crafts his devious plans unknown to both gangs and how he methodically takes down each of them. Some amusing scenes and humor are thrown in as well. The movie is such a clever masterpiece and still looks fresh for a 1961 movie. A stroke of genius.

Ikiru (1952)

IMDB entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0044741/

Genre: Drama

Ok, I had had enough of samurai flicks. I wanted a good drama and I got more than I wanted from Ikiru. Ikiru was on my "to watch" list for a long long time now. It is the story of a bureaucrat who discovers he has stomach cancer and only 6 months to live. He tries to search for purpose in the time left. Yeah, I know, we have seen maybe a dozen movies on this theme by now. But who knew, this movie would be the most "real" of them all. My tiff with other movies in this genre is they never show a terminal patient battling with finding a purpose. All the focus is on his emotions, past, memories etc. Of course, we have all of them here too, but this movie sucks you in because it makes you think beyond your sympathies for a dying man. This movie is relevant even if you are not battling a life-ending disease. It's sole focus is how we do "busy work" and not really anything credible or purposeful. It is also a satire on human behavior. The last 40 minutes just threw me off - it was a fantastic satire on how average humans are influenced by good things but for short time, they are mostly "all talk and no purpose" and do not have the courage to change things.

The opening lines puts everything in perspective

"Ah, here is our protagonist now

(Protagonist is seated on a desk, buried behind stacks of paper in a bureaucratic department).

But it would be tiresome to meet him right now. After all he's simply passing time without actually living his life. He might as well be a corpse."

Rashomon (1950)

IMDB entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0042876
Genre: Crime, Drama

Rashomon is an experimental movie - four witnesses to a crime tell their own version of what actually took place. Each version differs from the other and is left to the audience to believe which is true. The witnesses testify in a courthouse but the interrogator is never revealed - the camera is always facing the witness. It is as though the witnesses are talking to us, the audience, explaining the series of events that led to the murder of a samurai. The woman who plays the samurai's wife is brilliant. The scene where the dead samurai himself testifies (wtf, i know right!) using the woman's body as the medium, is creepy. Very well enacted by the actress. Other notable features of this movie was the clever camerawork. While each witness's story is played out, the camera is positioned differently to show how a different perspective or angle changes our own perception of the crime. The story takes place entirely in woods and the visuals are so well shot for a 1950 movie.

Apart from the interesting storyline, it was really the underlying theme that interested me more - Why do humans lie? Do we need to be selfish to survive? Like Ikiru, it questions our weaknesses as a human and our faith in humanity.

PS: If you really have to pick your first Kurosawa movie, I would highly recommend to go with Seven Samurai. Can't go wrong with it! While I can't wait to see four other movies of his I picked for my next viewing.

Looking back: All things Chinatown

2013-02-17T06:25:00.000-05:00

When the Lunar (Chinese) new year happened this year, I felt nostalgic. I miss just doing the rounds of Chinatown in any city. And tasting a lot of Chinese delicacies. There is something exotic about their food. Of course, I am not too daring to go overboard with their exotic stuff (eels, frogs and the like). But I love some of their seafood variety, fruits and exotic flavored ice creams. And the dragon masks and decorations :-) And I love dumplings. And their herb teas are great for the palate. You know where this is going - I am such a big foodie. Gosh.

I think a fair share of affinity to street style Chinese food comes from my love for Indian dhaba style food. Give me a plate of greasy chowmein, stir fries and lots of sauce and I am good to go. So I was mildly surprised when I saw the real Chinese food taste so different from the Indo-Chinese fast food that's served in India (sort of like Panda Express). A lot of actual Chinese food is broth baised/steamed/lightly cooked.

I am huge fan of dumplings so I made a trip to Prosperity Dumplings in New York's Chinatown. Of course I went alone ;-) I venture out on my own on explore-as-you-go type of food crawls. Because it requires an appetite for patience and handling stomach upsets. And I am not sure how far my company can push. Hence alone.

They are a hole in the wall. But I wasn't too surprised by the long waiting line (and this was on a weekday late noon). They have about a 1000+ reviews on yelp. I have been to some elite Dim Sum places, but they pale in comparison with the dumplings at Prosperity. They are famous for their pork chive fried dumplings - too bad I don't eat pork. So I just went for their steamed veggie dumplings, duck and carrot stuffed sesame pancake (greasiest!) and a noodle soup. Washed it down with a bottle of cold water. All for a total under 10$. Now who could beat that?!

After that I got two scoops of lychee and black sesame ice cream from Chinatown Ice Cream Factory - their asian flavors are the real deal! I then made my way through a whole alley of souvenir shops (btw this is where you should buy those "I love NY" shirts. A lot of tourist end up buying them from Times Square. Not done :-)) And then reached the open markets to buy fruits and seafood. Btw, you can't bargain with the Chinese - not only because you don't understand their language but also because they are very relentless. You are better off trying but wouldn't guarantee a discount. Haha. So I didn't push the lady in the picture too much and got a bountiful of dragon fruits, cherries and plums.

Then I headed to the seafood stores. Oh what heaven! Picked up some fresh shrimp and snapper (their seafood deals are a steal!). But careful not to get cheated. They mix in some stale fish with the fresh ones. I also always walk up and down few stores to compare prices.

A word of caution to the vegetarians, some of the sights and smells at a Chinatown can be really hard to take in. Because there will be, invariably gregarious window displays of slaughtered animals for purchase. Yeah, the Chinese are all out about displaying meat and not shy in this case. I have seen the ballsiest of my non-vegetarian friends go dizzy in their stomachs, on such sights.

As for me, I was born to walk around Chinatowns in every city :-)

Movie recommendation: Dosti (1964)

2013-02-12T11:20:00.003-05:00

Note: I tend to revisit this movie whenever I am in mood for a classic:) This is easily one of Hindi cinema's most cherished but less heard classics. The legendary music and Rafi's voice is just an added bonus.

IMDB entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0146645

Genre: Classic, Drama

Language: Hindi

First a slightly amusing story about how I happened to watch this movie. When I was a kid, I loved watching commercials (crazy I know!) over anything else. So when this movie was played on the television I got up to leave. But my parents coaxed me into watching it. How you ask, would they achieve a rare feat like that? A little girl in the movie (who plays a small but pivotal role) goes by the name Manju. And presto, I fell for it. I was mighty amused (and proud) that they would use my name in a full length feature film.

Alright, that might not have been so much amusing after all. But anyways. You MUST watch this movie if you are into long lasting friendships and all (who isn't?). This is the single most awesome movie on friendship and will ever be in Hindi Cinema. And please, I don't mean Dosti - Friends Forever, a 2005 Bobby Deol movie. Sigh. This is a 1964 classic with unknown faces but who will melt your face with their acting and emotions. Also, for those who think Sholay is the greatest friendship movie ever - b**** please.

Btw, full movie is available on YouTube (yay!)

The movie follows a rare friendship between a blind boy (Mohan) and a crippled boy (Ramnath) who live in extreme poverty and meet each other by fate. Mohan leaves his village in search of his sister (he doesn't know her address) while Ramnath is homeless and orphaned and has the passion to study. Penniless and poor, they roam the streets of Bombay. Mohan has a gifted voice. Ramnath plays the mouth organ and both of them make little money off their street (singing) performances. Rest of the story is how both brave hardships but find what they want - Mohan helps Ramnath achieve his dream to study while Ramnath helps Mohan find his sister.

If you are an Indian, you would've definitely heard atleast one track from this movie. The music of this movie is legendary and has some of the most melodious tracks rendered by the lethal combination of Laxmikan- Pyarelal and Md. Rafi. You will also happen to recognize a young and bright Sanjay Khan (the guy who played Tipu Sultan in the 90's, remember?) in a miniscule role. The rest of the cast is pretty much unknown.

What makes this movie so endearing is the sanctity of it all - a no frills story, poverty in post independence Bombay, the general apathy towards the poor (yes, this has always been there, not just a modern day malady) and above all the rare friendship between two young men who depend on each other for survival initially but form a strong bond later. You will be really embarrassed for modern day Bollywood - the storytelling in this movie is so pure and human relations are depicted so accurately (no over-the-top drama and no ill-conceived characters). If there was an IMDB list for top 100 bollywood of all time (is there), this should be in it - no exaggeration.

If you want to watch a Black and White Bollywood classic, please make it this one. Worth the 2 hours, if not for anything, atleast for the music. I bet you won't forward the songs in this one.

Getting back to fitness: Week 1

2013-02-11T01:30:00.000-05:00

Last 3 months have been the longest break I have taken from my workouts since 2009. And thanks to my extreme sickness and medications, I struggle with even 5 lunges today. But what seemed like an even bigger shock is it is SO MUCH harder to start from scratch. Hmm..

Now I start to wind down within 5 mins of anything that is cardio intensive (I mean 3 mile sprints were a breeze before so it is very demoralizing for me now). This is so so so hard. Now I get it why people who have never worked out their entire lives shudder at the thought of it.

So I thought why not make it simple and responsible by journaling some of the progressive routines I will be using to gain back all the muscle and stamina I have lost.

Firstly, we need to focus on getting the basics right before starting the routines. This is essential because most of us have very little understanding of the basics of fitness and tend to ignore them. To ease into a fitness regimen it is important to first take care of basics and then build from there (aka everyday diet and well-being). I have skipped many of them owing to my illness but no more excuses. So here goes:

- Drinking plenty of water. I almost always don't do this. Your energy dips when you don't consume enough water. Sometimes when I get a slight headache or I am stressed out, all I do is drink some water. It really helps. Plus, water is the most natural way to flush toxins. The reason we need to drink more water is to get rid of excess sodium or toxics in our body.

- Taking care of your spine. This is another thing I tend to ignore. Owing to long hours near laptop or other gadgets, it is not just your eyes but your spine that will hurt. It is the single most important part of your body. It is very very important to maintain a good posture, regardless of whether you are standing or sitting. Worthwhile to practice sitting straight without back support for few minutes each day like the meditation/pranayama pose. Even better if you can do some back stretches and yoga routines every day for few minutes. You can fix anything in life, except for a damaged spine.

- Getting adequate stress-free sleep. I have been really erratic with my sleep schedule. This is in fact the simplest lifestyle change and yet so tough to stick to, given our "busy" lives. 7 hours on an average is said to be best duration. But things to note are: to keep away from gadgets before sleeping, ease into sleeping i.e relax and clear your mind of troubles, put away lights that might interfere with your sleeping. My bedroom windows face street lights, so it is very annoying. I will need to fix this by getting thicker curtains.

- Getting adequate Vitamin D. Believe it or not! We don't get enough Vitamin D anymore. Yeah, I know that is ridiculous right? Tell me how much time you spend out in the sun these days? Rarely. I don't even see people taking a walk. Half our lives are led in air conditioned rooms and cars. A little sun exposure is all we need.

- Keeping active. Don't sit for too long. Get up even if it is for 2-3 mins once every hour. This will help in the blood circulation and you will feel less sluggish. (In fact, I opted for a standing desk at work last year and it really kept me fit and nimble.) Always take stairs! This is one of the most natural ways to rev up your metabolism anytime anywhere. Apart from that of course, you should aim for intensive cardio routines for a minimum of 20-30 mins, atleast 3-4 times a week if not everyday. I will talk about them in my later posts.

- Eating a well balanced diet. Please don't starve! Rules of a good diet are simple - aim for multiple colors in your food selection. A few greens, reds, yellows. You get the point. Keep away as much as possible from processed foods - fried food, soda, cakes etc. Try to reduce sugar/salt intake in your foods. Don't drastically cut them - you will have a rebound! Instead try to reduce a bit at a time. If your body is used to a certain kind of carbs, you don't have to replace them completely - you will get fatigued. For eg: I am a big fan of rice. I eat generous amounts of rice everyday. Instead of cutting rice completely from my diet, I try not to eat rice for dinner most of the days. This is my way of controlling rice intake. You can also substitute with brown rice, but I really don't care. You should almost always eat what you like, just keep an eye on portion control that's it.

- Practicing to breathe. I have NEVER done this. And sincerely, I always turned myself away from mindfulness or meditative practices. This is definitely a very new thing for me. So I am not going to advice on this like I know it; because I don't. So I am going to start with a 5 min meditation everyday and go from there. Let's see how this goes.

So anyway, this week my aim is to get back to habit with the above and include some easy stretching routines (my next post). Hopefully this helps you all.

"Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going. --Jim Ryuh"

PS: I can tell you how hard it was being sick and miserable for more than a month. I have learnt the hard way that good health is the greatest gift from God and I am definitely taking care of it and being grateful for it, from now on.

The best advice on nurturing creativity

2013-02-05T00:00:00.001-05:00

"Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through."

---- Ira Glass, renowned American Public Radio personality

You can watch the complete video of Ira Glass on Storytelling on YouTube:

Getting your shit together

2013-01-31T02:16:00.000-05:00

What? You mean you never had one tragic moment in your life? The one which is sort of "kick in your pants" failure moment. But, how is that even possible? If so, then sorry to say, getting your shit together will get that much more harder.

It is true. Determination, willpower and all those underdog type abilities emerge when we confront unexpected, massive tragedies in life. I always felt they were like little reminders to make you appreciate your routinely good life a bit more. But you know what is more amazing? It is that "kick in your pants" feeling. That sort of outrage that builds up in you - that says to you to stop being such a sissy about it and get up and face it. And whatever it is, conquer it.

It is hard to be maddeningly focussed and determined in normal circumstances. Pick any kind of underdog - they have been through rough times, some crazy low point that it kicks them in their pants to do their best. To prove their best.

This phenomenon is called "Getting your shit together". This happens mostly when tragedy strikes (sorry some of you incredibly lucky people who sail through life, this ain't for you.) Yes, getting dumped by your boyfriend/girlfriend is gold (see video). Although I wouldn't, in my wildest dreams, break up with Joseph Gordon-Lewitt, if he were my boyfriend.

Ok so if you have read so far, let me give you some more unsolicited advice.

All those motivating TED talks and all, they are short-lived, ok? Your brain processes them in and out it goes. Ask the TED speakers if they were driven by watching only TED talks. They will tell you. So instead recollect something tragic that has happened to you and how you came out of it or didn't - what do you want to takeaway from it? No, not about being weak and pain and sadness. I meant take it as an inspiration instead.

If all else fails, just think about your (Indian) parents. That should do. (Yes, they are exasperating at times. Admit it ;-). Or think about your boss. Or that snobbish friend. These are your best bets.

Meanwhile, if nobody is inspiring you or you need some laughs or you are just plain tired reading this blog post, watch this kid pep talk you for instant energy.

The Rest is Noise

2013-01-22T08:55:00.002-05:00

"Do you really think it will be full?", I ask my friend seated beside me, busy checking on his office mail.

"Ya sure it has been what..like 45 mins now?"

I nod. I was chugging down a liter of bottled mineral water. I was due for an Ultrasound Scan. The first ever in my life. And I was waiting for my bladder to get full.

"Umm can you google search what's the average time for a woman?", I ask my friend. I add, "No I am not joking. Please?", I plead him. Just for the record, that day I waited 3 hours.

That morning when I had arrived I read the big information banner outside the ultrasound room about safety precautions and a pregnant lady's photo beside.

"Umm, remind me why am I doing this? Isn't this for pregnant people?", I ask my friend. Both of us shrug. I was asked to get tested for an acute infection in my body.

The first time I entered the room, the technician was annoyed with me.

"How much did you drink?"

"2 glasses", I said nonchalantly.

She rolled her eyes and pointed the monitor with a little disgust. "Look that is 10 ml. I need atleast 400 ml in your bladder."

"Oh I was told to drink 2 glasses."

"No you come after drinking a liter and only if you feel your bladder is blasting."

Ok I say and come out and drink. I was puking on water beside my friend.

"This is like Ellen Page drinking Sunny D in Juno", I say and both of us laugh.

December 2012 and it was supposed to be the holiday season. The hospital had a tiny christmas tree in the corner but hoards of people sick with illnesses and worry. And this day was my only "light-hearted" day to be for a month from then.

I ran fevers of 104F. I wondered for the first time if 104F was this, then how would a third degree burns patient feel?

My mom once touched my cheek when the temperature was a little over 104 and she immediately withdrew her hand back. As if she touched a boiling pot on stove.

"It was like touching fire. My fingers didn't lose the heat till about a minute.", she told me later.

Every night, somewhere between crack of the dawn and early morning, I had viral attacks. I would be under two thick blankets and a winter jacket and bouncing up and down the bed. The virus gave me horrific shivering for an hour each night.

"It was like in the movie exorcist, as if you were possessed.", my dad said the few times he managed to baby step to my bedroom. Dad is chronically sick and cannot move freely.

It was enormous pressure for mom. She sometimes held on to my body to hold me from shivering, but the shaking was so uncontrollable she would get thrown off. "I was scared. I thought if I held you it would stop", she told me later, naively.

After the shivering, I ran temperatures as high as 104 for few hours and then withdrew into sweating profusely - the only time I would remove the blankets and jacket off my body.

The viral attacks (sometimes multiple times a day) left my body in so much pain, that I coudn't even turn to one side of the bed on my own. So going to bathroom was obviously a nightmare. It was an ordeal that lasted atleast 30 minutes. Some days I would drink less so I didn't have to make an extra trip to the toilet.

The antibiotics proved no match to the infection in my body. The doctors couldn't tell what sort of infection it was and where it was in my body. Their medicines only made it worser. They gave me mouth blisters. All kinds in my mouth. In every nook. About half a dozen atleast.

I stopped eating. I couldn't talk without my mouth paining now.

I was confused, upset and started cussing. I would call the virus all sorts of swear words. I would cry sometimes and yell at God. As if, mysteriously he had conspired against me.

"Why me?", I shouted every sleepless night as I waited for the viral attacks. I turned phobic.

Weeks went by, but not one doctor could diagnose me. I took a battery of tests. Each time I got the test reports, you would think I would be happy seeing "Negative" results. But I cried. I cried because if I was positive on a test, that meant I am still not diagnosed for this GOD DAMN INFECTION.

My condition worsened every day. Some days my digestion would be upset for no reason. I stopped working. I ate less and barely smiled. I couldn't bear noise - the loud sounds from TV. Music disturbed me. I waited through silent days and nights. For the first time I heard the clock ticking in the room. Each minute was hard to pass by. 24 hours seemed so long to me.

Each day I lost confidence and weight, both in large measures. In 2 weeks I was down 7 kilos (15 lbs). My parents tried to motivate me. My dad mocked me saying I had no guts to face it all. (He always uses reverse psychology to provoke or motivate me.) I was in pain and I didn't care. I dreamed about taking a hot bath (I hadn't bathed for a month now.)

"Do you think I can get back to shape and run long distance? I've lost all muscle.", I asked my friend. "You just breezed through the half marathon, you can do anything.", he said with a truthful tone to his voice.

Slowly the cussing stopped and I started praying. Praying to God. Begging for mercy. My friend had meanwhile visited temples, held special prayers and prayed hard. My mom prayed. My friend's mom prayed hard. Finally I was put under a clinical trial of drugs without diagnosis of the disease. There was such a thing called Fevers of Unknown Origin in the medical literature. That was me now, experiencing it.

The doctor said, "You may or may not tolerate these drugs. It depends on how much your body can take. These drugs are very powerful." I didn't care. By this time I had made my mind to get out of this. I popped about 10 drugs a day, 4 of them that were so large I feared I would choke on them. But I didn't say a word. I just prayed and said "God just let the drugs work."

And they worked. Slowly, but steadily. Giving me hope, confidence and fixing my wrong attitude along the way. I made my mom sneak in a pack of Lays Chips and a bottle of thumbs up just because I wanted to taste something salty and sugary (although I am supposed to eat healthy more now than ever). Life felt good for the first time in months.

All my life I felt that I was a self made woman. That I didn't require help. Nobody's help. Not even God. Help was for losers, I thought. Help was for lazy people, I thought. Many moments I took my parents and friends for granted. The only people who became my strong support system through a time that was unimaginable for me.

I didn't understand how this infection in my body was even humanely possible - I worked out few times a week, I ate healthy and I prided myself about never falling sick for 28 years of my life. I despised silently those who fell sick, because I thought it was their own doing. Until I saw my own father falling into depths of chronic sickness. And still I hadn't developed enough empathy for the sick. Now I have a new found admiration for people who fight ill-health EVERY SINGLE DAY of their lives. I cannot imagine what that must be. Because I have had enough for a month and a half - enough to throw my confidence and hope, off-balance.

The thing is there is an important lesson hidden in every experience. But there is something about failures and tragic experiences that bring in a change in you. In those days of sickness, I realized how much I wanted to do in life. That life is too short. That we take our life for granted - our good health, parents, friends & close ones, happy memories, opportunities etc. People with permanent disabilities and far fatal diseases live life with confidence. Then why are we, normal average people, plagued by worries?

The mysterious thing about happiness is it is in our perspective. For ages, people have researched, studied and taken surveys about happiness. But I realized it is in accepting the moment - whatever that is. It is in the way we view things, cherish things and see the positive in everything. The tragic experiences in our life test this faith of ours to be happy, no matter what.

It is tough to be happy, if you choose to. It is easy to be happy, if you choose to.

Now I pop about 5 drugs per day like candies and joke about the orange color of my urine (a result of the drugs). "It is more like the sunset orange.", I describe to my mom who reacts with disgust to my rather detailed descriptions.

Even now when I think about my illness, I shudder. I am still recovering but it feels like a miracle to get rid of viral attacks. But the miracle happened when I resolved to fight it and get out of it. When I saw people around me give strength it felt foolish to sit in a corner and cry.

Because that one moment when I decided to be positive and have a little faith, I chose happiness. And the rest...the rest was just noise.

How to learn a foreign language for free

2012-12-12T22:12:00.001-05:00

I have been learning Spanish since a month now. (Me encanta aprender espanol!)

I know, that probably doesn't make me any expert to write an article as this. But I believe you will find some worthy recommendations here (specially resources you should use). Best of all they are all FREE!

Learning through mems

Earlier in the year when I read Joshua Foer's Moonwalking with Einstein I was fascinated with this whole business about remembering things. Certainly, the memory championships are won by ordinary human beings and not wizards. So it was exciting to learn a technique or two about improving memory. Cutting short, there was a Guardian article on how Joshua Foer learnt a language in 22 hours. There he refers to a site built by former memory champions called memrise.com. A site where you can learn languages (among other things) through visual cues (mnemonics or what they shortly call as "mems"). Till date, I remember some of the complicated phrases in Spanish thanks to memrise. It is fun and addictive. Give it a shot!

Learning via apps

One of the best language learning apps out there is Duolingo (only available in iPhone as of now). Thanks to Mr. Ashton Kutcher, who tweeted this and there hasn't been a day where I didn't use this app to learn Spanish. Ok, there was a day and the Duolingo team promptly sent me a reminder (whoa!) that daily practice is essential to learn a language. So now you must wonder, there are several apps, so why this app? I think what works in this app is you can take short lessons in under 5 mins or so (if you were waiting in a line somewhere, commuting, or just bored), you could switch to this app and learn a word or two. Also, the app structures the lessons really well (so you are progressing from one level to another) and is very comprehensive!

Learning via podcasts

I love my iTunes! Specially podcasts and iTunes U. I could sit on them the whole day and forget to work. They are that addictive. One of the most popular language learning series on iTunes is Coffee Break Spanish. These are short podcasts (weekly I think) that cover Spanish lessons offered by Scottish anchors Mark and Cara. They make it really interesting through conversations, basic phrases, holiday jingles and what not. Basically very very simple but effective.

Learning via iTunes U

And then there is the traditional way of signing up for a language course. This is the least recommended, honestly. Because you are going to find yourself less and less motivated to stick to it. But one of the things I was struggling with while learning Spanish is grammar. Grammar, yes, is important. So I found a course by University of Arkansas on iTunes U called the 5 minute Spanish. This focuses only on grammar and is a 5 minute series (again!). Very effective in getting rid of those grammar questions.

A nagging question for instance was when to use "es" and when to use "esta" in Spanish. A 5 minute lesson in this course just crushed it!

Learning with a buddy

Honestly, if I continued to live in the States, I would easily find a Spanish speaking buddy. And that is probably the best thing to do anyway - practice speaking a language with a native speaker. But since I am in India, I learn by practicing with a friend who is also interested in learning the language. So we try to do conversations as if we were two native Spanish speakers. It is fun to make mistakes and laugh over it. Plus, we add our own creative ways of remembering it :)

Learning by listening/reading

This is something I caught on to a little late because I had to build up to the basic Spanish words before I start watching Spanish videos. I picked up a Spanish book recently and I watch Spanish commercials on YouTube. Although, I am still on the lookout for a nice Spanish soap or TV show that I can follow (Recommendations welcome:))

So really when I was watching Life of Pi I jumped up at the scene where Pi is in the hospital and there is a headline in the local Mexican newspaper that reads something like "Chico 277 dias..."

I immediately grip my friend's arm and say hey I know what that means. I had to show off you know ;)

Movie recommendation: No Country for Old Men

2012-12-09T02:20:00.002-05:00

Note: The movie that inspired me to read the book (from which it was adapted). Need I say more?

IMDB entry: No Country for Old Men

Genre: Crime, Thriller

If you enjoy symbolisms in movies, this one will be definitely liked. This movie at first viewing might also seem to be borderline meaningless. Until you get the symbolism of it all. That I got it only in the second viewing, is something that I will admit to frankly. Plus a second viewing is a must, to have a greater appreciation of this movie. It grows on you, like vintage wine or cheese.

Don't worry about the title, not yet. When the end credits roll you will totally get it. The movie follows a drug deal gone wrong in a remote Texas county. Moss (Josh Brolin), a smalltime plumber, stumbles onto the scene and walks away with the booty. However, there is a pyschopathic killer Chigurh (Javier Bardem) who is on the trail and will stop at nothing to get his money. There is also an old sheriff (Tommy Lee Jones) in the mix, who investigates the murders and is struggling to understand the gravity and deadly repercussions of the crime.

Sounds ordinary? It won't if you see it. On the outside it seems like the classic cat chasing mouse thriller but inside it questions the intentions of crimes we read about in the news, everyday. Crimes that have no motive. Crimes that are so maniacal, it is gut wrenching. And such a story, as seen through the eyes of the sheriff, tells it all. That we live in a world full of violence, that is unexplainable and unfathomable. And this is what the sheriff struggles with - to understand the psyche of Chigurh.

The sight of Chigurh is menacing and sends chills down the viewers. And Javier Bardem just epitomizes evil in this character - a kind of lunacy that is hard to imagine or comprehend. This conversation from the movie substantiates Chigurh's description:

Man who hires Wells: [about Chigurh] Just how dangerous is he?

Carson Wells: Compared to what? The bubonic plague?

There were scenes where my hair stood up; seeing him walk with the cattle gun (he carries a shotgun cylinder that is used in slaughterhouses to kill cattle). My heart pounding when the sheriff goes back to the scene of crime in the motel and Chigurh is inches away from him. And that with no background score, an ominous silence (except for the creak of the footsteps and the sound of breath) made it as intense as it could get. For that and the unconventional storytelling, I have to give credit to the genius that is Coen brothers (The Big Lebowski, True Grit fame)

The problem with this movie is - either you like it or don't get it. Some things I appreciated on my second viewing is the way the Chigurh's character is given no justification - he is simply monster of a man - no explanations for his behavior. That good doesn't necessarily triumph over evil, all the time. That sometimes the unexpected of things can happen and you wouldn't see it coming (similar to the climax of this movie that jolts you for a moment and also leaves you confused). This movie is as good as it can get for a modern Western tale. But watch it closely to get its intricacies.

Interactive R learning site

2012-12-06T00:03:00.001-05:00

I am really bummed finding this site on Hacker News this morning. (Follow the comments there to find more dope)

Kind of like Code Academy for R (language).

This is a brilliant way to not just introduce you to R but give a peek at the power of visualizations using R. I am ploughing through the lessons and you should too.

For example I am right now visualizing a dormant New Zealand volcano in lesson 3. And a simple command in the interpreter gifts me with its 3D contour and heat map.

Full points to the folks behind it. Also clever of them to put plugs to relevant Oreilly resources:)

More power to data scientists!

Movie Recommendation: Senna

2012-12-05T04:14:00.001-05:00

Note: During a chance browsing, I bumped into this documentary on Netflix. Easily one of the best documentaries I have watched (more than once). A must watch, even for non-Formula One (F1) fans like me. Strongly recommended!

IMDB entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1424432/

Genre: Documentary, Drama, Sports, Memoir

I am not a Formula One fan. I don't even watch the sport or follow any related news. My only reference to F1 is perhaps a name "Schumacher" and the word "McLaren" inscribed on my boyfriend's bike. So yes, that disclaimer was meant for everyone like me who knows nothing about the sport and doesn't care much about it. So imagine my surprise when I just felt so taken by this documentary on Senna.

Ayrton Senna was a legendary F1 racer from Brazil, who had near mythic status in the world of Formula One. And this is a documentary spun over recorded events and archived footage of his life (I have a dislike for documentaries that are huge portions, reenacted). Parts of this documentary were so intense, it broke my heart. I now have a huge appreciation for F1 racing drivers and the sport.

The opening lines of the documentary nails the mood and story that is going to unfold as Senna's voice booms in the background:

"1978 I came to Europe the first time to compete outside Brazil in the world championship. It was pure driving, pure racing. There wasn't any politics. No money involved either. It was real racing."

It follows the struggles of Senna in the world of Formula One championships. From a young passionate driver to a cult figure, battling his arch nemesis Alain Prost, riding high on emotions and spirituality as an individual, fighting for the safety of drivers and yet fiercely competitive on the track purely out of love and passion for driving. The documentary with its haunting background score makes it a thrilling ride (ya pun intended but true to the word). You get a glimpse of behind the scenes of F1, as seen and experienced by Senna.

It is exciting to watch the rivalry between Senna and Prost and heartbreaking to watch the tragic climax. But what caught my attention (and will surely draw yours too) was his spirit. His raw passion and spirit to ride above controversies and hold his home country Brazil so close to his heart (he was deeply concerned and involved with finding hope for Brazil's poverty and economic instability), even though a large part of his life was spent living in Europe and pursuing a racing profession.

The scene that nearly made my eyes wet was the one from 1991 Brazil Grand Prix. (I was eating at the time and stopped chewing the food in my mouth). This was the first time he had won in his home country. And that, after beating all odds of driving a broken car and triumphantly waving the Brazilian flag on the win.

This movie is a perfect tribute to the icon that is Senna. And kudos to the director for not including re-enactments or third person interviews on Senna - they just break the narrative in a documentary. This is one of the major reasons why people who like movies (commercial ones) hate documentaries - because they are made boring by such distractions. The documentary is so well put together (thanks to its deft editing) that it is part sublime and part fascinating at times.

This is also a movie that will teach you a thing or two along the way. That nothing comes easy. That, come what may, you should never give up. That a sport can truly be a form of art or passion (because all he ever wanted to do was to race). That nothing can break a human spirit, so pure that it leaves behind a legacy called Senna.

Movie Recommendation: The Stoneman Murders

2012-11-29T07:51:00.000-05:00

Note: Because Talaash disappoints this week, I am going to recommend a lesser known Bollywood alternative to give you the chills. This one gives you the goosebumps and keeps you on the edge.

IMDB entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1183946/

Genre: Crime, Thriller, Suspense

This movie is based on the true life incident of serial killings in Bombay in the early 80's. Interestingly, this was never solved according to police records. The movie director gives his own spin (and conclusion) to this whodunit.

The movie dwells right into the crime in the initial 10 minutes. A pavement dweller is brutally killed (his head smashed by a stone) one night in the Matunga area of Mumbai. A local policeman who has been recently suspended sniffs a serial killing spree but the other policemen wave if off as a random killing on the streets. As suspected, there are numerous killings that follow and establish a pattern - the killings happen between hours of late night and dawn only and is targeted at the pavement dwellers. The suspended policeman thus continues to investigate about the murder, off duty. He sets out to gather evidence and prowls the streets in the night to prevent the killer from harming any more people. But he soon becomes a suspect after police find circumstantial evidence incriminating him. Who is the serial killer and why is he targeting only the pavement dwellers? What is the motive behind the killings? The movie solves these as it approaches the climax.

This movie is bone chilling. The pace is quick and keeps you on the edge. Except for the stray song in a bar, there are no such distracting interruptions in the movie. The underbelly of Mumbai - street dwellers, tramps, bar dancers and the flourishing businesses in the dark add to the mood - most of the movie is dark. There are several times where policeman and the killer run into each other. This makes the movie very racy. The conclusion is believable (backed up by a possible and practical reason for such brutal killings). However, it is not something new - this kind of a conclusion has been seen before in other movies and is rather the only weak point in an otherwise gripping thriller.

What can I say about Kay Kay Menon? As the suspended policeman who tries to solve the mystery, Kay Kay Menon shines and how! He has such formidable acting skills and is convincing as the trigger happy and reclusive cop. Contrastingly, Arbaaz Khan in a smaller role struggles. Rest of the cast does ok. The direction and editing is slick. This movie would have had more impact on a big screen, in fact.

Overall, a good psychological thriller sure to be enjoyed by thriller movie fans.

Being generous is ridiculously easy

2012-11-24T09:16:00.000-05:00

"Did you see that?", I ask my friend sullenly.

"See what?", he shoots back.

I replay how I just saw an old ailing couple, sitting on a pavement and sharing halves of what looked like an orange. As I recollect, I realize how cold I felt on the shaded street that winter evening. I couldn't help but wonder how tiny rags did any good for the homeless couple on that street.

It doesn't help much to discuss at length about such "obvious" things in India. Things that wrap me in pangs of guilt. Because we speak about them and easily forget. Like every time, I try to push out such gloomy thoughts out of my mind. But there is always a breadcrumb of trailing thoughts that follow me, eventually.

"There is so much I can do. There is so much I can give back. Then why am I not doing that?", I keep questioning myself. The feeling is unsettling at best. But I can easily distract myself through work, books or movies.

The next morning at work, I am vile about a news story that ran last night. I narrate to my co-worker about a group of cops (I think?) who defused couple of bombs in metropolitan Pune this year (with no body protection) and the government gave them 100 rupees (2 US dollars) as a reward, the story reported.

"Why? Why do we (Indians) put cricketers and celebrities on a pedestal and shower them with huge monetary rewards that they apparently don't even need, but we insult such acts of bravery? Why is a human life so cheap in India?". I seethe in anger as I eat my lunch. "I hate how we are so contradictory. And yet here we are eating a big lunch and watching a stupid cricket match.", I mutter under by breath as the match plays over a big LCD in the office cafetaria. (Two people across the table shoot me questioning glances. I was loud enough apparently.)

"You cannot think about everything at once", my lunchmate replies matter-of-factly.

I am furious and he does his best to calm me. We decide to take a walk and talk about it.

"We must do the really tiny things we can.", I say.

He nods in approval. "Did you see how much food is being wasted in the cafe?"

We have a whiteboard where the cafe team puts up the quantity of food wasted everyday. Data that embarrasses me. I again sulk in depression.

He waves me aside and tells "That's the power of data. Unfortunately, that isn't leveraged to send the right signals to everyone. Do you know how many people are even taking notice of it or pausing to reflect over their food wastage?", he asks. I continue, "To bring out the real problems, we need both - data and insights that evoke a reaction from people." We both nod and sigh in approval.

Charity starts at home, they say. Do your bit, they say. But how many of us really do our bit? Yes, each of us have personal goals, commitments, promises to keep. But is giving back such a big deal at all? I think not.

I am now going to obsess over how much food I am wasting, or how much coffee I leave behind in the cup. This week I have decided to journal this. Yes, I want to quantify this. Yes, I want to be pedantic about this so I can take a stand for myself - That I will never waste food. Maybe I am selfish because am trying avenues to live up to my conscience. So be it. But the repercussions are plenty and unknown to us - for example an article that tries to demystify Why India can't feed its people put me on the edge once again.

I think everyone knows and agrees that we don't have to be the Bill Gates of charity. We just need to our bit - our own acts of kindness and generosity. Because being generous, it seems to me, is ridiculously easy.

Movie recommendation: Stanley ka Dabba (Stanley's Lunch Box)

2012-11-22T09:37:00.000-05:00

Note: It takes a lot (for me) to like a kid-centric movie. Yes, I am heartless like that. It took me two times and undivided attention to even appreciate Taare Zameen Par. But this one is different. It is a winner from the get go.

IMDB Entry: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1907761/

Genre: Children, Family, Drama

If there is a movie that can connect to you in nostalgic ways, this is it. It brings back your school days. Of trivial fights, innocent friendships, crushes on teachers and the like. Plus, an important message delivered to the audience is the icing on the cake. Every movie story must connect with the audience, emotionally, for the greatest impact. And Stanley ka Dabba has this one in the bag.

Stanley is your average high school kid. He is bright, smart and a favorite among kids and his "Rosy" teacher. His friends share their lunches (tiffin boxes) with him since he doesn't get his own (his excuse is his mother is out of town so there is no one at home to prep his lunch box). Meanwhile a gluttony school teacher who teaches Stanley's class sets eyes on their substantial lunch boxes. Stanley's friends are not too happy about it and evade the teacher by changing their lunch spots everyday. But not too long, as the teacher soon understands that he is being tricked. Out of anger and humiliation he asks Stanley to attend school only when he can bring his own lunch box. Will Stanley get his own lunch box? What is the mystery behind his lunch box? This forms the rest of the story.

Without giving too much away, this is what works for the movie - a suspenseful precedent (why doesn't Stanley get his lunch box?), heartwarming high school moments, subtle digs at Indian teachers who emphasize rote over practical projects (yes, our education system is wrong in so many ways) and a surprising but impactful message at the end of the movie. You come to understand in the end that "dabba" (lunch box) was only used as a metaphor for the greater message it wants to get across.

Incidentally the director, Amole Gupte was also the writer for Taare Zameen Par (a film on dyslexic kids). And no, both movies have no similarities and neither is it a sequel (the kind of assumptions people make, uff!) In fact, he excels much more here with his storytelling that sounds far less preachy and yet has a far reaching message to deliver. A message that will leave you brooding for a couple of minutes after the movie ends. The genius lies in the honest treatment and the powerful climax that ties in with the story beautifully.

It isn't every other day that you come across honest cinema with a good message. Sometimes I wonder why Bollywood movie folks are spending boat loads of money on insubstantial, brain-dead and purposeless stories when they could easily make a dozen such meaningful movies. Stanley ka Dabba proves that cinema can be both honest and entertaining at the same time. And for that you owe yourself (and your family) to watch it.

Plus heartstrings will be strummed. Guaranteed.