Just For Kicks

Mr.Procrastination

2012-11-20T05:55:00.000-08:00

I know procrastination is a massively overused topic of conversation, which is probably not good. As my dad would say,"Master procrastination and you will master your life. Son" yeah yeah sentimental. Whatever. I'm sure procrastination must have its upsides, just off hand I would say that stress release could be one. For example, today, my Chemistry exam went absolutely atrociously, so I got home made myself some food (45mins), ate(30mins), ate some junk food while watching TV(1hour) and then decided that I was going to get fat before I had to pass English so I went to go run off all those lovely procrastination calories at the gym. After this I weighed myself just for shits and giggles and noticed I had actually lost 2Kg's after all. So since I had actually lost weight I decided to eat some more. After this I decided I'm being an absolute girl by worrying about my weight so damn much and listened to some Bob Marley for half an hour. It is now 3:47pm and I haven't started studying, instead I am writing this useless blog in the hope that I can boost the R0.01 I made yesterday to maybe R1.00 today. Its just a thing I have, procrastination that is, because now after all this procrastination I feel great (Bloated yes, but great) much less stressed. So moral of this story is that perhaps there is good in all bad things. In moderation of course. Happy Studying students :)

Life According to Albert...

2012-11-13T07:38:00.001-08:00

I've had this new gardener for quite some time now, and I couldn't help but notice how useless he was... I'm sure my Mother has employed him out of pity or something because he really is the dumbest person I have ever come across. As harsh as this statement is, he makes up for it with his friendliness and humorous acts of stupidity. For example, once he was asked to weed a small section of grass, I even showed him by means of example how he should go about doing such an impossible task. After asking him if he fully grasps the concept, he eagerly replies,"Yes yes" although I have come to realise that this is pretty much his standard reply to almost anything I throw his way. (Me:"How are you today Albert?" Albert:"Yes yes") So after an hour of doing homework (Yes tweeting useless shit) I came back to find that Albert Einstein has completely ripped out all grass from the section I have asked him to weed. Annoying? Yes. But the laughs I get from this dude are directly proportional. Life According to Albert...

Twitter...

2012-11-10T07:22:00.000-08:00

As many of the readers of this post will know, I am an avid 'tweeter' rightfully or wrongfully so. This means that I waste much of my time typing rubbish and tweeting it out to the universe to be criticised and sometimes even liked. In this post I will be doing just that, criticising, as I do best. As I go on to my feed right now I can already something that makes no sense, and I haven't even had to scroll yet. @WaitTilYouSeeMy (What kind of name is that anyway, what are we waiting to see? Her ass? Her horrendously stupid tweets? Whatever) This chick said something along the lines of a haiku she made up about getting out of bed and it goes like this:"No no no no no No no no no no no no No no no no no". Now alight fine she can make haiku's I really don't have a problem with that but why tweet this in the first place? Like, for example, am I going to be all like,"Wow that haiku really made a difference to how I get up in the morning, I'm going to Re-tweet that shit right away!" NO! Which brings me to point number 2. Why do people Re-tweet emotional love rubbish to send a message in disguise to someone else? Tell them, doubt it can hurt as much as these emo love tweets filling my timeline are hurting me. Seriously. I know its probably rich coming from the idiot that tweets like 50 times a day, but then unfollow, at least I don't steal content from Googles' humour etc. Enough ranting for today, just a tip: Keep it simple stupid.

Epic nut shots, This guy is probably sterile!

2012-09-05T09:34:00.001-07:00

So I was watching =3, this is a video show that reviews viral videos, and I found this one guy on YouTube that just gets hit in the nuts in various ways for popularity or whatever. He is 25 years old, and still hasn't grown up. He also has a young daughter. (Perhaps she is extremely annoying and he just couldn't handle another child, and so started getting hit in the nuts real hard all the time) If you are a guy, you can appreciate how much stupidity (Balls) this guy has. I doubt you can imagine the pain you can go through when getting hit in the gonads if in fact it has never happened to you, or if you just don't have a 'set' of your own. (Unless getting punched in the boob is sore, but I wouldn't know. Oh yeah and child birth, but that happens once, maybe four times in a lifetime) Either way this guy is crazy, in every-day day life too, he just screams like all the time (Its super weird). American stereotype right there, screaming and shouting to voice their stupidity (That's mean I'm sure there are Americans(I have yet to meet) that aren't like this). Ill post one of his many videos where he gets hit in the nuts with a giant tyre. I realise most of my views come from those crappy blackberries (I also have one, so relax, I also keep it just for BBM) so I'll explain in words how this goes down: 1. Dude says it is going to be the most epic thing he has ever done, exact words,"This is the most intense thing I've ever done." (He says this super calmly. LoL). 2. He calmly lies there awaiting the "Intense" pain... 3. The tyre is let loose onto a ramp, and then lands directly onto his balls, the tyre then bounces back up and makes a thudding sound. Ouch, shame. I fail to feel any sympathy (He is such a tosser, sorry) but s**t me that must hurt like a b***h. Until next time were I will write about this guy that touches 1001 boobs with only one rejection. XD LEGEND

Innocent prank goes horribly wrong!

2012-09-03T10:45:00.003-07:00

So (I guess this has become a thing now) I was browsing YouTube, as I do when I have lots of work to do (Check my last post, I rant about the work the teachers give us), and I found this video. Now before you get to see the video you need to know that YouTube doesn't allow any vulgar videos to be uploaded. This is therefore fake, but it still made my heart jump! I did double check, because it seemed very realistic as you will see. Id love to know who has the time to do this stuff (Okay wait I would probably do this just for kicks one day if I were bored) it has 1.9 million views and has been up for around a year and a half now.

Teacher Logic.

2012-09-03T07:41:00.000-07:00

So today got me thinking, this week, is one of the most hectic weeks of term. If not THEE most hectic week. We have so many projects, speeches or work tasks to hand in. This could just be me caving in from all the pressure but I feel that this could have been avoidable. Not on the students part but rather on the teachers, if you know marks must be in 6 weeks into term, spread the workload rather than cramming it into the last week you have! I'm not being unreasonable am I? The teachers are constantly telling us how WE must manage OUR time more effectively. Well I'd like to tell them that THEY need to manage THEIR time better so that WE don't have to stress as much. By spreading the work load it also would help them, I mean then they don't have to cram marking time in order to reach the deadline. I realise this might be bias, but I think I have a point here, I'm not just saying this because of all the work I'm unhappy with. I feel this makes logical sense...

Appliance shopping with the rents...

2012-09-02T09:38:00.003-07:00

So today I went to Clearwater mall for what I thought would be a simple breakfast and perhaps an hour at max of shopping for some kitchen appliances for our new holiday house. I was wrong, sorely wrong. We had breakfast, which was the only reason I tagged along in the first place, then we started our 5 hour search for the best freaking appliances South Africa had to offer. Nothing was good enough, and when it was, it was the wrong freaking colour. 2 hours down the line I get so bored in this one shop that I decide to jump into one of those massive fridges. Shortly after I get in and close the door (About 5 mins passed) a salesman and three of his costumers peek their heads into the fridge. It was so awkward. Wow. I had to get out and walk away while they where awkwardly there in my way. Then it gets better, we are in the SAME SHOP for another HOUR!!! (My parents are so freaking indecisive) So I had to sit there on a couch and wait while this salesman kept on walking past giving me death stares... At this point in time I am very tired of walking around and stuff so I fall asleep on the couch, luckily when I woke up on the couch on show we were leaving. Weirdest day evar! (Yeah I did spell that wrong, deal with it). Here is a picture of me (Yes that is in fact me) Lying on the couch in that shop. My mom found me on the couch sleeping and thought it was hilarious, so she took this picture :

Bath Salts, Makes you crazy man!

2012-09-02T08:07:00.004-07:00

New story! (At least I didn't start this post with "so"! Yippee!) This guy aged 20 who lives in California (Living the dream man!) was arrested earlier today (Dream = Dead) for the attempted murder of a sweet old lady aged 70. This guy, named White (what a name. Wow.) was trying to kill birds with a shovel in the local park, he was going absolutely mad. This is because he was in fact high on bath salts (The Latest drug, all the dead kids did it) which he had drunk in his Coca-cola can an hour before. The 70 year old lady saw this plonker waving his shovel around like a lunatic, trying to hit a bird, so she asked him politely to stop. He refused and started chasing her around the park trying to hit her! This is a very serious matter but I cant help laughing at the silly picture I have created in my mind of this absolute idiot trying to catch and hit an old lady with a freaking shovel! What is more is that when the police shot him to the floor with rubber bullets and asked him what he was doing, he calmly said that he was an alien and was talking to Jesus at the time. What the hell!? This just goes to show how much bath-salts messes with your brain. Drugs are bad okay? The police then tied him to a wheelchair (Don't ask me why, its probably protocol in America, weirdos...) and he kept on telling people that God loves them. This story is super messed up but kind of made my day in a round about way, I do realise it sucks that a granny had to be hit over the head with a shovel... : (

Right pic is bath salts DRUG left is just the crap you bath with...

Not this kind of bath salts!

And here is the effect of the drug, not staged.

A new look at my posts... (A man gets hit with a freaking shovel man!)

2012-09-02T07:31:00.000-07:00

So (yes I'm starting it with 'so' again, just get used to it) I now know that you "People" are monitoring this, so I'll write about stuff that DOESN'T interest you nosey little bas***ds. What may that be you ask? Well I want everyone else to be interested so I chose to post a video of a drunk guy getting hit in the head with a shovel (Man that excites me!). Yeah that does sound a bit too good to be true, but I assure you this is real. I did some research and tracked the source of the video, and found out that it was not in fact staged. Lets be real, who would want to be hit in the face with a spade anyway? Turns out this guy was doing his job, shovelling away and the drunk guy sitting next to him was chirping him about how badly he works, this became more serious and friend number 3 started recording. And this is the result!
Here is a picture if you didn't understand anything I just explained super clearly...
Just to be VERY clear here, I am not responsible for any of you idiots hitting anyone with a shovel, if you decide to do so. And I do not encourage you to do so, and I definitely do not entice rebellion when you so do. Whatever just enjoy this freaking video... (Watching what I post is a pain, screw the system man, screw the system.)

The shovel incident...

And here is the video all this crap is associated with : )

Civvies day from the Perspective of a carrot.

2012-08-17T07:47:00.001-07:00

So today I actually did go to school in a carrot costume, not the greatest one at that. It smelled a smell I have never smelt before, a bad smell. Anyways. I got to school and before I knew it people were pointing fingers and laughing. It made my day, wherever I went there would be someone staring at me with the biggest smile. I did however get lots of people comment on how "gay" I look. Well I don't care, it was possibly the most fun I've had at school. One downside to the whole thing, I got punched in the stomach; kicked in my shins twice and I was even tackled to the floor by some random girl. I don't think they like carrots very much. That is all, peace out. Eat your veggies sexy People! : )

Cone-ing in a carrot suit.

2012-08-15T08:26:00.001-07:00

Guess what I'm planning!?

It brings me great pleasure to announce that on Friday I will be coming to school in a giant carrot suit, provided there are carrot suits left. I'm pretty excited to be the one of the only "tools" that have ever wasted a civvies day with doing something as awesome as this! Then to sweeten up the whole idea, after school I shall go cone-ing. Ill get someone to video it and shall post the video up here soon : D

A loss of sleep can make you fat, yes that's right, FAT!

2012-08-15T05:16:00.001-07:00

So I read about this study conducted on Australians, and provided we are genetically similar these results may even help us, and no it is not the study of sheep. It turns out that most obese or fat people tend to , on average, have less sleep than those who are of normal weight. This was tested among kids aged 8 to 18, but the scary thing is that the fat kids only got 20 minuets less sleep per day. When you don't get the correct amount of sleep every day, your body's hormonal mechanisms become unsynchronised and this contributes to the way in witch you retain weight. So the moral of this story/Australian sheep study is this: When you are tired, go to sleep. The end, nothing complex. So go and sleep well tonight, be healthy. That is all ; )

So now I have seen it...

2012-08-14T07:11:00.001-07:00

The experience

Many may think that cone-ing (as it is spelled correctly) is stupid and well, immature. This is completely true. Why would you want to get a bunch of ice-cream all over your hands for some stupid joke? The answer: For that priceless reaction the cashier person gives you! Its 100% worth every bit of that R3.60 -or however much it was- and more. Here are some photos of today's stupid events...

Coning

2012-08-14T04:21:00.002-07:00

Coning - All the cool kids are doing it!

So I have recently discovered the latest trend! Literally all the cool kids are doing it. If you've heard of planking, owling or even batman-ing; I'm sure you will be able to guess what coning is about. To cone all you do is go to a McDonalds, or any place you can get your hands on some soft serve ice-cream, and when they serve you, grab the top of the ice-cream! That's it! then just wait for the tellers reaction. Ultimate trolling. Keep posted for a video, I'm going to try it out my local KFC in about an hour or so.