my world

The worst movies of this decade:

noreply@blogger.com (abhi) — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 11:22:00 +0000

Now this is going to be far more excruciating and daunting than my last post of 10 best. Simply because 90% stuff churned out by Bollywood is almost mediocre if not trash.

The list is basically consists of the most hyped and the most disappointing, both at the same time. Some of them might not have got such a bad reputation had they were not hyped as the most awaited movie of the year.

Like my pick of the best 10, this one is also a completely personal choice and I know many of you will disagree to at least a couple of them in the list. Let’s see if this goes down well with all of you or not

1. 1. Mohabbatein: How will you decide what was the biggest flaw with this Adi Chopra fare when the name itself does not exist in any dictionary and was a creation of Adi Chopra’s creative mind. Each love story in this romantic torture was a pain to watch and we had 5 of such nauseating couples if I remember correctly. It was actually a horror movie in the name of romantic movie, with Aish playing the ghost herself. But the humans in the film were more horrifying than the ghost. The most atrocious of all was SRK who was hell-bent on teaching love lesson to anyone he meets in life. How desperate. With all his hamming, stammering and arm stretching pose in all the songs, He created a new bench mark for over acting which only he can overcome. And losers brigade (Shamita Shetty, Uday Chopra, Jugal Hansraj and others) were competing with each other to prove who can look more stupid. But the biggest loser was Adi himself who many years later with RNBDJ proved again that he still has what it takes to make worst possible cinema.

2. 2. Yaadein: Many will say many reasons behind this nightmare called “Yaadein”. Over expectation from Hrithik, Subhash Ghai’s confusion whether he is making a love story or a father-daughter movie. And why the hell the whole movie looked more like an advertisement than a movie. Hero cycle,coke,Paas Paas and many more such commercials in the name of a movie. Nothing worth to keep “yaadein” of in this painful 3 hours.

3. 3. Gadar: The worst possible jingoistic crap possible from Sunny Deol school of cinema. Anil Gadar Sharma took some challenge to take jingoism and extreme chauvinism or nationalism to such a level that nobody else could ever dare to match it. I am no Pak lover but still can’t digest the fact that their Army is so useless that one Indian sardar can make a mockery of it so easily. Gadar had everything possible which is a staple food for any jingo-crap movie. Bad pakistani,a noble and superman like Indian who can take out the hand pump to fight with 500+ men and not get hurt at all in the process. In the form of patriotism, this was the worst possible Deol torture dished out to Indian public. Hope Anil Gadar Sharma’s “Veer” is not a sequel to this.

4. 4. Main Prem Ki Diwani Hoon: If there was any text book for overacting, this must be the bible for the same. Hrithik must have committed some sin that he had to don the role of “Prem” but believe me the punishment given to him was 10 times bigger than the sin he might have committed. The less I say about Kareena the better. Even the animated dog and the parakeet in the movie deserve more respect than the whole cast. SB went insane in trying to match the KJs and the chopras in terms of packaging saccharine sweet Indian values with miniskirts, pre marital sex. But boy, how he failed.

5. 5. Mangal Pandey: Nobody knew the fact that Mangal Pandey was in love with a prostitute till this movie was released. Kudos to Ketan for showing us this hitherto hidden fact. Along with Mela, It is a strong contender for the worst movie of Aamir’s career. I still wonder what took Ketan and Aamir 4 years to create such a piece of shit. The torture was painstakingly well above 3 hours which made this movie unbearable even for a blind. It takes hell lots of commitment to create a period drama and this movie showed none such whatsoever.

6. 6. RGV ki aag: This movie is so bad that if I don’t keep it in this list, some people might even kill me for this crime. I think RGV was challenging himself to reach the nadir of crapness with this movie. And why so much fascination with Nisha’s derriere? Everything worked for original Sholay, and nothing really went well for this Aag which burnt almost everyone’s brain. This became the perfect example why classics should never be remade. Because if you can’t better the perfection then why go for low grade stuff.

7. 7. Saanwaria: This was perhaps the first blue film released with a “U” certificate and perhaps the movie could have borrowed its title from another pathetic film “Blue” in this list. Slated to be the most awaited, and rated as the most hated of the year. While designing dreamlike sets, lighting and costumes, SLB completely forgot that he will need a script too. Perhaps real problem was the decision of making a movie out of Dostoevsky’s short story because there was hardly any scope for movie adaption. Only SLB knows what he saw in the story. Ranbir and Sonam could never choose a worse movie as their launch pad.

8. 8. Tashan: This year will be remembered for the agony YRF forced upon the movie goers and “Tashan” will most certainly take the biggest credit in the process. Only Anil Kapoor could comprehend his “Hinglish” in the movie and only he can wear that ugly garb showing his pot belly and mammaries. Kareena was so desperate to show off her newly acquired size zero that she forgot she gets paid for acting also. Someone please ban the director who took every one of us for granted and showed no respect to our intelligence. Somehow Akshay never learnt his lesson and went on to give us many more such eyesores (CCTC, Kambakht Ishq, Blue etc) one after another.

9. 9. Kambakht Ishq: A totally kambakht, mindless drama with two leading actors of bollywood and some out of work stars of Hollywood. Makers could have easily used a bit of big budget on script too if they had cared a little for poor audience. Somebody kill the man who wrote those sexist, racist dialogues? And why Kareena, being a woman herself, had no issues in mouthing those dirty lines or even doing such a shameful venture which shows woman in worst possible derogatory manner. And what to say for Akshay, he seriously needs some help. Movie was full of women getting slapped, being termed as good for only one thing, sex talks and lowest possible slapstick comedy. If anyone dares to watch a mockery of cinema, this is the perfect stuff for him.

10. 10. Blue: Can we believe that a team of Rehman, Akshay,Sanjay and chicks like Lara and Kylie Minogue can give us headache that no disprin can pacify. Touted to be the most expensive movie ever and turned out to be the silliest of them all. Did they really need such money to make something so foolish? You would choose to sink in the sea than tolerate this painful dose of 3 hours. There was so much build up for the treasure hidden somewhere in the deep blue sea and that only Sanjay Dutt could get to it. The way treasure hunt with no thrill whatsoever was shown, everybody almost banged his head in frustration. We wished some of those sharks to eat them all. But Phew!! What a shame, none could even touch any of them. And this was the most difficult treasure hunt mind you. As for Sanjay Dutt, simply his career- worst but Akshay has many more such flicks to his credit(Tashan, Kambakht Ishq etc).

P.S. I know many names worthy of being called the worst of all time such as Asoka, Kisna, RNBDJ, Jhoom Barabar Jhoom, Drona, Singh is King, Dil Bole Hadippa, KANK and even some not worth mentioning like Deshdrohi, Fox, Sheesha and the likes have missed to figure in my worst 10 movies of the decade. But I was lucky to not watch most of the above mentioned horrors and that’s why could not consider them for selection. And yes, most hyped ones were my prime targets while picking 10 names.

Best Movies of this decade

noreply@blogger.com (abhi) — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 06:11:00 +0000

This list is open to all kind of criticism and brickbats and I am listing it out keeping only my personal taste in mind. There can be few misses which is nothing but logical as the list consists of only 10 Top movies in the order of their release. Hope to see your own list in the comments section...till then just enjoy my picks.

1. Lagaan: Once upon a time in India: One of the best of not only this decade but of all time Indian cinema. Not because Oscar hype, Aamir or anything else but because this was a story of hope, grit and fighting for what you believe in. Cinema was never to sweet yet meaningful, lengthy yet gripping, bucolic yet contemporary.

2. Dil Chahta Hai: First time when I watched it, I was shell shocked. I could not believe what I saw. Farhaan had arrived and showed us the whole new meaning of Kool. Cinema will never be the same. We all will be obliged to DCH for giving us an all new Saif who really rocked in his new avatar. It was so fresh and ahead of its time that even now it has great repeat value.

3.Haasil: Many of you may not have watched this movie and many might have forgotten the name too. But it will remain in my favourite because it gave us one of the most outstanding performances of this decade. Yes, I am talking about Ran Vijay Singh i.e. Irfaan Khan. This movie has so many memorable dialogues delivered perfectly by both Irfaan and Ashutosh Rana.

4. Munna Bhai MBBS: Had anybody seen any comedy like this? Was not this a path breaking and path setting at the same time? Munna and Circuit will remain one of the best filmi jodi along with Jai and Viru. Let’s not forget the message the movie tried to put forward.

5. Hum Tum: I know many will counter this choice but I have to be honest with myself. This is the only romantic movie which I never get tired of watching. Rani and Saif were as spunky as they come. I accept the theme or may be even story was not original and the movie borrows so much from Hollywood romantic comedies. But it worked and that’s what matters.

6. Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi: This one showed the angst boiling inside every youth. The characters were so beautiful that you can connect to all of them. It is set against the backdrop of emergency and shows the political and social turmoil India went through in those times. Ek Dum Real.

7. Sehar: Best Police force movie post 2000, I must say. Better than Khaki not in terms of performances but in terms of detailing, authenticity and make believe characters. The story is based on many real life crime incidents in UP of 90s. Here the protagonist has not been shown as the typical Bollywood policeman who is more often than not a one man army. He is as real as any of your local cops can be. Moreover this movie does not make caricatures of our police force which was a big relief.

8. Rang De Basanti: The idea of creating revolutionaries like Bhagat, Azad out of present day cool college going beer guzzlers really worked. And who can forget ARR’s magic and the mass hysteria the movie created throughout the nations. We saw so many protest campaigns inspired by RDB. Truly masti ki pathshala.

9. Chak De India: Shimit Amin’s best till date which speaks a lot about this movie because Ab Tak and Rocket were outstanding too. I still can’t figure out what really worked for this movie. May be it was understated patriotism, gripping screen play, SRK’s portrayal of a tainted coach struggling to prove his loyalty. The title song became the new Anthem for everybody.

10. Oye Lucky Lucky Oye: I regret missing this movie on the big screen but still I like it more than Khosla ka Ghosla which many of you will rate better than OLLO. I know there were few flaws in OLLO but still it worked for me and keeps me glued whenever I watch it. First 25 minutes in itself is total paisa vasool and the rest respects your intelligence. And Manu Rishi was just perfect in the role of Bangali, a side kick of Abhay. Watch it again to know what I mean.

P.S. The selection of movies was really a daunting task as there are many of my favourite movies which missed the Top 10 by a whisker. Lage Raho Munna Bhai, Dev D, A Wednesday, 3 idiots, Jab We Met, Ek Hasina Thi, Gangajal, Omkara, Maqbool, Cheeni Kum, Monsoon Wedding and many more such superb movies could not make it to the list just because of my personal taste and preferences. They are no doubt in my all time picks.

Mistakes i made haunt me till date.......

noreply@blogger.com (abhi) — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 17:33:00 +0000

How did it, get to be like this?
Alone I sit, thinking the past was bliss
Mistakes I make, alone I must face
Hearts I break, are hard to replace
I was drinking, I wasn’t thinking
I hear my fate sounds like my heart sinking
Life is a test, how did I get this stressed
Swore I’d never let anyone get my best
With love comes pain, I have only my self to blame
For the mistake I made, I’ll never be the same
Every day I pray, make it go away
I’m most sorry to you, loving me and being by my side
But I’ll hide my actions between us in this world
Hopefully we can get past this and grow
But will never show anyone till death takes a hold
I can’t end my own life..
Please forgive me in the afterlife!..If any....