The Heights and The Depths.

Streamlining

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 15:03:00 +0000

No, your computer isn't messing up my layout. I'm tightening things up around here a bit. Just got tired of seeing so much "stuff" on the page. Later.

Something Sweet

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 14:30:00 +0000

Two little sweeties before bedtime.

And a recipe you for which you will thank me.

Go bake these cookies today. Yes, I am a bad blogger for not having an uber-close-up picture of a freshly baked cookie along with the recipe. You will simply have to trust me that these are delicious and every bit worth the effort!

(you'll find this recipe all over the internet, but I'm re-typing it here in my own words)

Big, chewy, chocolate chip cookies!

2 cups plus 2 Tbsp all-purpose flour
1/2 Tsp baking soda
1/2 Tsp salt
12 Tbsp (1 1/2 sticks of butter - unsalted - don't use margerine!) melted and cooled until warm
1 cup packed light brown sugar
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 large egg plus 1 egg yolk (creating the chewiness! best if the eggs are room temperature)
2 Tsp real vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups semisweet chocolate chips (I used Godiva)

Pre-heat oven to 325.
Whisk dry ingredients together. Set aside.
With an electric mixer or by hand stir together melted butter and sugars until well combined.
Add egg, egg yolk and vanilla and mix until well combined.
Slowly add dry ingredients and beat slowly until just combined.
Carefully stir in chocolate chips.

Roll dough into a ball roughly 1/2 cup at a time and pull apart into 2 equal halves. This creates the perfect size cookie! Place balls on a cookie sheet with plenty of space between cookies. Bake until edges begin to golden or turn under and middles still look soft. Do not overbake! Start with 10 minutes and go up from there. Enjoy!

Firsts

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 19:18:00 +0000

MCM went to her first day of Mother's Day Out last week. I wish I had a picture of her all suited up with a backpack or something, but here she is with her dear friend Mousy ("Missy" in MCM speak). She also has a sweet old-school lunch box (the metal kind) with the Disney princesses on it.

LCM is now big enough to sit in the Bumbo for short periods of time. This is where she ate her first taste of big people food! (well, organic rice cereal mixed with breastmilk - hardly a "big person" meal)

She took to it quite well, although I think later it made her tummy hurt. Lately I could see that she's been wanting to be a part of mealtimes. It's no fun to be left out while everyone else is eating! She loves to be involved in everything going on around her - especially whatever her big sister is doing!

MCM finally go a haircut! It was really just a trim to even it all up. Her bangs still fall in her face constantly, because she takes her bows out. I couldn't bear to let them cut bangs though!

We went to Sweet and Sassy, which is a beauty salon for little girls. It's a pretty genius concept - totally cutesy and girlie. They had flat screens all over the place playing Lady and the Tramp (MCM's dream!). And there was a little girl birthday party going on where they were all in dress up clothes, singing and dancing, sporting fresh up-do's and having a grand old time. MCM LOVED it! She might have thought the party had to do with her new haircut, because she hasn't stopped talking about it since! We left with a souvenir photo of "baby's first haircut" which has since been loved to pieces. MCM carried it around for over a week and even wanted to sleep with it. Ah, the beginnings of narcissism! She is pretty cute though...

Still Here

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 21:04:00 +0000

We're still alive, folks. I've officially become one of those bloggers who doesn't blog. Man, that gets on my nerves. I'm getting on my own nerves. Not to make excuses, but life with two little bitties is extremely busy and at times more overwhelming than I would like to admit. Free time...there's not much of it. When I do have it, I usually find myself either sitting and staring or (rarely) trying to do something productive like fold the mountains of laundry that keep popping up. But, we're still here.

LCM is 4 1/2 months old. MCM is fully two and everything that means. I keep thinking life is going to get easier and we'll get on top of things around here soon, but it hasn't happened yet. Between waking up with LCM at night (no, she shows no sign of sleeping through the night) and MCM's early rising (rarely past 6:30 am), I am a bit of a walking zombie. There have been some milestones that will need recording soon...MCM's first day of Mother's Day Out, her first haircut, LCM's first taste of rice cereal, and her first trip to Nashville. There's a lot to catch up on, so expect those catch-up posts soon.

I Love These Girls.

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 01:49:00 +0000

This girl makes me laugh....even though she looks a bit like a crazy person covered in leg tats. They're just stickers.

This girl has so many smiles. Each one revives a little piece of me that mostly wants to cry over how exhausted I am and how I used to be an somewhat interesting person, not just a Mom.

Three Months Old

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 19:13:00 +0000

Hanging out watching MCM, as usual.

I just rolled over!

Here I go again!

It's pretty cool learning to do things.

Snuggle time with my favorite two-year-old.

LCM is three-months-old. That is so hard to believe, but it's true. She is growing up MUCH too fast! It's amazing how I can already see her wanting to do the things her sister does. She rolled over last week for the first time. She is so strong for a little gal! She's holding her head up, and trying so hard to sit up - though that's not going to happen anytime soon.

Things are so different the second time around. I am more laid back, and she is a much more laid back girl than MCM. Still, we've had our moments. She's been struggling with tummy troubles. I'll spare you the details, but basically her poop is messed up and we're not sure why. I've changed my diet and we've tried getting probiotics into her. So far it seems better for a few days and then worse again. When her tummy hurts, she cries like a mad woman - red-faced screaming and constant interrupted sleep. Not fun.

However, when she's not hurting, she is a delight. She has a very sweet way about her, always looking around with big eyes and taking everything in. She "talks" a lot, and sometimes it almost sounds like words. She laughs and smiles and loves it when you talk or sing to her. She loves to watch MCM and doesn't seem to mind her constant hugs and kisses. She's definitely growing into a social being and loves to be right in the mix as long as you'll let her - through naps and even in the middle of the night! At night she's sleeping about 5-6 hours in the early evening, has one middle of the night feeding, and then sleeps on for 5-6 more hours. I'm so thrilled to see her do that on her own! Maybe she'll sleep through the night in the next month or so? She's still sleeping in our room, which I have really enjoyed. If for some reason she has a hard time going to sleep I'll lay her right next to me, and she LOVES it so much. I must say, those are sweet moments with her so close and sleeping. (not to mention I can feed her and sleep right through it) I am going to have a hard time moving her to her room, but I think that's coming soon.

I'm not sure what her stats are at this point as far as weight and length, but my best guess is that she's close to 12 lbs now. She is growing so much every week, and she literally looks more mature every day! She already looks different than these pictures, which were taken last week. I'm trying to stay on top of picture taking, but it is very difficult with 2 babies to care for!

A Lady and Two Babies, One With No Shoes.

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Sat, 01 Aug 2009 18:40:00 +0000

That was me yesterday afternoon wandering down our street with a tear running down my face, holding one baby in my arms and another by the hand as she hobbled down the street shoeless repeating, "Bye-bye! Bye-bye!" in between sobs. We were evacuating the house.

MCM was exhausted, and LCM wouldn't sleep. I was simultaneously making dinner for LCM (and making her eat it - two separate acts) and trying to coax LCM to sleep, when all the sudden an incredibly loud, high-pitched sound started going off all over the house. I ran down the hall to the alarm system, trying to figure out how to stop the screeching, when I realized perhaps I should remove my infant child from the noise before her ear drums burst. Then, I looked up to see MCM in her high chair screaming and crying with her hands over her ears. In one swoop, I snatched her up and ran them both out of the house thinking there's either an intruder or a fire. We left so quickly that I didn't close the door to the house. I was holding the baby and trying to comfort MCM (who also wanted to be held). After deducing the situation, I realized there was no good way to go back in the house and figure out the problem - couldn't leave MCM there to cry - she was already terrified - couldn't leave the baby sitting alone in the grass or take her back into the noise, so we started over to the neighbor's house. Nobody home. Then, on down the street (This is all about 6:30 PM. Daddy still not home from work. No cell phone, no keys, no nothing.) I figured we'd have to walk down the street with or without shoes, until I noticed two young girls with a baby about 6 houses down. I yanked MCM down the street and approached the ladies (while sort-of crying) and asked if they could kindly hold my babies while I run down the street to get my car keys. Just then I see Leland pull into the driveway. We were so far down the street, he couldn't see us. He was pretty sure we'd been kidnapped. So, I thank the kind ladies, and yank MCM back down the street - she's balling now because we're going back toward the scary noise). By the time we get back to the house, Leland comes out and realizes that indeed, we're alive, but the fire alarms all over the house are going off simultaneously for no apparent reason. Even after removing the batteries, they continue to go off. So, he packs us up in my car and we go down to KK and BT's house. KK graciously bathes MCM, who is quite covered in apple juice from her meal. I feed LCM who has been awake for God knows how many hours. BT goes to help Leland make the noise stop. Now all fire alarms have been removed and holes with wires hanging out are left all over the house. (We have an abundance of fire alarms) Now MCM is scared to go to sleep. Now MCM is scared of the hole in her wall. Now MCM is refusing to nap, because the noise might come back...and her teeth hurt...and her eye (which she calls blink - "blink hurt!!)...and she needs to poop every 5 minutes. LCM went to sleep after showing off her best blood-curling screams for me and for Leland. This is a mere snapshot of the week we've had. It is never ending.

Photo Friday (still no time to chat)

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 19:17:00 +0000

I don't have a lot of time, but I do have pictures.

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 19:57:00 +0000

I'll add actual words later...

Super Close Up

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 19:24:00 +0000

MCM, it sure is good that you're so cute.

Naps...we're 1 for 3 so far. Monday, yes there was crying, but eventually there was a nap. Sure, it was shorter than usual but it was substantial enough, and we've been praising her like crazy for being such a great napper. Tuesday, more crying, then quiet until I noticed a new scenario - playing quietly in her room (so that Mommy won't hear) instead of sleeping. We got the no crying thing down, but it's still the SLEEP that is missing. Today...working on hour #2 of trying to get her to go to sleep. 2 big poops (the child actually holds her poops for naptime - manipulative poops, people!!!), some crying, probably 45 minutes of playing when I thought she was sleeping, but NO SLEEP. I'm not beating a dead horse hear, folks. The child has been falling down tired since about 10:00 AM. I hear her singing right now. It should be cute, but it's not!!!!!! Where is the sleep??????

Between the absent naps, Lucy's crying (oh so much crying), and the fact that Bachelorette Jillian let Bachelor Reid go, I am just not loving this week...not at all.

Sleep Begets Sleep

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 20:01:00 +0000

That is the most true statement from any sleep book out there if you ask me. (Weissbluth - Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child) It's my mantra as I make this week about getting MCM back into her sleeping routine.

I came to a conclusion after dealing with the daily tantrum all last week. We've worked so hard to acclimate MCM to life with a little sister that we've perhaps gone overboard in reassuring her. We've tried to spend as much time with her as possible, so at naptime and bedtime we've spent more time than usual settling down with her. Before LCM, at nap she would often crawl into bed and want to go right to sleep. Sometimes I would lay down with her and read one book and snuggle for a minute. Since LCM arrived, I've been inclined to say yes to many of her requests, meaning, "You want to read three books before nap instead of two? Okay, sure! You want me to lay here until you're almost asleep? Sure!" I think we've overcompensated for our new situation enough that we've gotten off track a little bit. This is not to say that I take full responsibility for MCM's behavior by any means. It just means that for her, there's safety in sticking to the routine. When I relax it too much, she just can't stay within the boundaries of what works for her. So, this week we're sticking to the usual routine. Nap begins between 12:30 and 1:30 PM, and bedtime is between 7:00 and 7:30 PM - no later! It drives me crazy that there's any variation in time, but that's just life right now - especially when there's only one of me to go around. As soon as they begin cloning mothers, I'll get Courtney #2 to put MCM to sleep. Maybe she will handle the crying a little better.

Seriously though, I'm doing everything humanly possible to maintain an air of calm and patience at these times. But I'll tell you, by about 4:00 PM - even if they both nap - I'm running out of steam. By 6:00 PM I'm cursing under my breath, and by 7:00 if things aren't happening like they should, I'm unraveling. Thankfully, that is about the time Leland comes home, and I can mentally give myself a little bit of a break even though with a toddler and an infant - especially one that breastfeeds around the clock - it never, ever stops. One day just rolls into the next, because I no longer function in 24-hour intervals. It's just one feeding to the next...on and on until who knows when. And, yes, I am tired...

...Wait, I forget the whole sleeping through the night thing. I literally forget that's possible, since MCM didn't sleep through the night until over a year. Maybe LCM will get that whole sleep thing down soon. I still have no idea how that could possibly happen, especially since she's been enjoying eating about every 2 1/2 hours at night lately. Her longest stretch of sleep happens between about 6:00 PM and 12:00 AM. Not sure why babies do that. I have the choice each night of either going to sleep and getting woken up an hour or so later, or staying awake and being completely exhausted the next day. What do you do? Again, I find it's better to never wake a sleeping baby (Weissbluth), and I hope that sleep will beget sleep.

The Force is Strong With This One

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 18:00:00 +0000

The Heights.

She looks so angelic, doesn't she? Lots of the time she acts angelic too. And then there are other times...

The Depths.

Today is the first day MCM has taken a nap since last Saturday. What the...

Not only has she not napped, she has thrown knock-down-drag-out full-on tantrums regarding the nap. Every. Single. Day. The worst day was Tuesday. I literally felt like I was in an episode of Supernanny. My child who only a week ago would gladly crawl into the bed and fall asleep immediately at nap time decided she would disappear. All at once I was concerned for the safety of this new MCM, who was acting like a caged tiger, completely hurt that she was acting so crazy, furious at her for her behavior and overwhelmed with how much I love her and want to do anything in my power to help her or comfort her. These "tantrums" if they can be called that, have lasted for hours each day. Hours. All week I've gone back and forth about how to handle this situation. I'm only learning about discipline. I certainly don't have the answers. In fact, I have no answers. (Please don't leave comments about answers or the books where I might find them.) I just happen to be a person who despises conflict and would gladly run as far from this situation as possible given the opportunity. Unfortunately, this is my child, and she must be dealt with. I feel a bit like I've been in a torture chamber all week. Perhaps this is what it feels like to be waterboarded?

If you're not blessed with a high-needs child, you just have no idea how far they can push you to the brink of insanity. That's where I have been teetering all week...hanging by a thread on about 4 hours of sleep at night and zero moments of peace when I've been awake (and about 1 meal a day, since that's about all there's been time for). I've been so tense, I've had to remind myself to breathe.

Oh, and I also have another child who needs to be fed/diapered/held/parented. It's awesome, especially because 90% of my day is spent meeting the needs of my high-needs child. She is spectacular and spectacularly demanding. I love her so much it literally hurts. The heights and the depths. She embodies it. Our relationship embodies it. And I'm not sure if I'm thankful for that or not.

My husband and I have concluded that a lot of her difficulty stems from how intelligent she is. Nothing gets past this child. Sometimes attempting to discipline her feels like trying to discipline an grown-up. She's so bright, it's ridiculous, at times, maddening (occasionally funny too). We've concluded that if we can just get through this time, she's obviously destined for greatness no matter what she does. No one with her amount of persistence, determination and will of iron couldn't be, right?

Oh wait, she's crying already. Today's successful (?) nap lasted all of 20 minutes. You've got to be freaking kidding me...

Isn't She Lovely?

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 01:35:00 +0000

It's hard to believe, but LCM is 7 weeks old. It's been a whirlwind, but somehow she's been with us for almost 2 months. In some ways it feels like much longer. I actually have to remind myself that she's as new as she is. Despite everything she's been through, she is still mostly a laid back girl. She rolls with the punches as well as any baby could, and I'm happy to say she is eating and sleeping like a champ. At her 1 month doctor's appointment she had gained 2 pounds and grown 2 inches. Last night she slept for 7 1/2 hours straight. Don't ask me about that one - could be a total fluke. I still don't quite understand how a baby can sleep like that, but it is very nice!! She is definitely her own little person, completely different than MCM, precious in her own little Lucy way. Her newest trick is the social smile. I'm a little obsessed with getting a smile out of her. It makes me so happy! She's also making the switch from brown hair to blond hair and is rocking blond roots with brown tips. Somehow she is managing to look more and more like her sister while at the same time looking an awful lot like her Mama's baby pictures. She's a pretty cute kiddo, if I do say so myself :)

Birthday Girl

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 19:22:00 +0000

Daddy and his girl. She was wanting her hands wiped. She does not like dirty hands.

Mommy, Daddy and sweet MCM.

I can't believe she actually smiled for a picture with me! (Yes, my hair is conspicuously darker. I'm trying to venture back to my "natural" color. This is a bit darker than it actually is...I think.)

More attempts at a family pic. Couldn't subject Lulu to the sun and heat though.

Getting a hug from her buddy, Sam.

Sam pulled MCM in her wagon just like she was the princess!

Then Daddy pulled his princesses...

Cake!

As soon as she saw the cake she stuck her fingers right in it! That's my girl! She loves the icing best.

Pop, Nana, and Lucy looking deep in thought.

KK was the only one who wore my Pooh ears. She and BT also went above and beyond picking up the cake and decorating everything.

Heat/cake/sugar coma.

But that doesn't stop her!

Trying so hard to escape posing for pictures.

Icing mustache.

"Me?" It took her a second to understand that the presents were indeed for her.

Guess what? It's a little hot outside for a party at the park, but we did it anyway. We weren't the only ones...Julie from The Real World New York was having a party for one of her kids too at the the pavilion next to us. (For all you youngins reading this, I'm talking about the 1st cast in NYC - not the crappy re-do a few years ago.)

Anyway, MCM finally had a birthday party, and it turned out great. There was sunshine, a cool breeze and cupcakes for all. Cake is really the only thing that matters to MCM as far as birthdays are concerned, cake and singing "Happy Birthday" - she loves it, and I've sung it to her many times this week. Thanks go the whole family for showing up. She loves to see you all, and I know she is a child who feels so loved by so many people!

At two years old...

She has 3 best friends - Blue dog, Snuggle, and Minnie Mouse. She takes them everywhere and talks to them all day long. They are invovled in all of our games around the house. We even hold hands with them at night when we say our prayers. Seriously.
She loves to play pretend with her toys. This is new, because before she always had to have me play with her. Now she tinkers around with her dolls and dollhouses and yes, even Thomas the Train and makes up little stories and dialogue. So cute.
She sings! She loves Twinkle Twinkle Little Star right now. I hear her singing it in bed with her 3 buddies every night. She also sings a song that resembles "Dumb Dog" from Annie. Mostly she just sings "Doooogeeee doooogeeee dooogeee!" over and over. It makes me laugh.
She talks up a storm. Especially lately she is coming up with new sentences every day. When we go places in the car she narrates the whole time. Hysterical. It's amazing to be able to communicate with her!
She loves her little sister. She asks about her first thing in the morning and as soon as she wakes up for naps. She tries to take care of her - offering her the paci when she cries and always wanting to hold and kiss her. Today she heard Lucy crying her room and ran to tell me. I said, "Is she crying?" and she said, "Paci." I said, "Do I need to give her a paci?" And she said, "Me." As in, "Me do it." So funny!
On the same note, she loves to mother her stuffed animals and toys. I think half of them are wearing Lucy's newborn diapers right now. We diaper them, give them bottles, burp them, and put them to night night all day long...even the trains.
She still loves dogs more than anything.
She still loves books and is growing into books with more words. Current faves: The Little Engine That Could, Caps for Sale, and her children's Bible.
She loves cartoons, mostly Disney movies. Her favs are Jungle Book, The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (watched almost daily), and Peter Pan.
She can throw a ball better than any two-year-old I've ever seen. The girl can aim. You better watch out!
She loves to do anything physical - dancing, running, jumping, skipping. She is a ball of energy.
She still has babas (bottles) every day and her paci! Not sure when I'll ever make her give those up...
She takes one afternoon nap that hits between 12:30 and 1:00 PM usually. She sleeps like a champ in her big girl bed and still goes to bed at 7:00 PM!
She is still one of the pickiest eaters around, but I feel like we're starting to make some headway in that department.
She is completely read to be potty trained. She's done number 1 and number 2 in the potty, but I've been really lazy about making the total transition, because of all the craziness we've had going on. It's coming soon though!!

MCM, we love you more than words could ever say! You are a blessing indeed!

Two Years Old

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 13:06:00 +0000

The sweet face in anticipation of a sweet treat...

But first she wants to kiss her sissy (every time she gets a chance).

And give a cheek snuggle.

Now it's time to get down to birthday business!

The next day she decided she wanted to be swaddled too.

And then she broke the swaddle for a nose pick. She didn't learn it from watching me...heh...but it looks like her sister is learning from watching her!

We still haven't officially celebrated MCM's birthday, but Monday we did manage to have a little fun...a trip to The Kids Gym, a grilled cheese at The Diplomat and most importantly, Lucy's napping afforded us the chance to spend the whole afternoon outside playing together - MCM's favorite and mine. I love this girl so much. She has turned our lives upside down and filled them with more joy and love than we could imagine. What a blessing you are MCM!

Sick Lucy

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 19:58:00 +0000

This is what a very sick baby looks like.

What a time this has been. Some of you know, and some of you don't, but last weekend Lucy became very sick. She was acting a little strange on Saturday and Sunday - sleeping more, fussier, etc. - but because she is so new, I thought maybe this is just a new side of her we're getting to see. She wasn't coughing, sneezing, etc., just acting a little different than before. Then on Sunday night she became increasingly fussy, breaking into intense cries pretty much every time we picked her up or touched her at all. About 3:00 AM Monday morning we took her temperature, and it was 102.5. Most of you know that is extremely scary for a newborn. We weren't sure what to do, so we tried to cool her down, gave her the slightest dose of Tylenol, and then took her temperature gain a little later. It was lower, so we decided to wait until morning to go to the doctor. Sure enough, by about 6:00 AM it was back up again, so we took her to the doctor (shout out to Dr. Casey), who sent us straight to the hospital.

This was all new to us, because MCM has been such a healthy baby. We got to the ER and they had to do what they call "a full septic workup" - (something they have to do for all babies less than 8 weeks old who run fevers) a urine test with a catheter, drawing blood (inserting an IV), spinal tap (!!), and usually a chest x-ray, but that was one thing we were able to escape. We had to let our poor 4-week-old baby get poked and prodded and listen to her scream bloody murder while the doctors did these things...knowing they're necessary to make sure something is not horribly wrong, but also just wanting to say no to all of them, because it seems so cruel for a little baby to go through that! Particularly the spinal tap...which tests for meningitis - something you don't want to mess with. We felt we couldn't say no, but after watching her go through it...5 times, yes, it took 5 TIMES until they were able to get spinal fluid...let's just say I'm practically having nightmares about the whole experience. Poor Lucy literally cried so hard that she just eventually fell asleep (or passed out) while they were doing it. It makes me want to cry just thinking about it.

Then we were admitted to the hospital where we stayed from Monday until Friday. Lucy ran high fevers for 4 days straight, which was extremely scary. I have never in my life seen a baby that sick, or even a child that sick. The whole experience felt like we were torturing her, but we were just doing everything we could do to make her better. Every test ame back negative, and ultimately the doctors decided it was some sort of fever virus that would just have to run it's course. Things like that are super common for bigger kids like MCM, but in an infant they are SCARY!

It was a horrible week on so many levels. We are so thankful that Lucy is home and doing better, but now we are dealing with the cumulative effects of a very stressful 5 weeks. Obviously, Leland and I have not gotten much rest. He has been sick and I have been with Lucy 24/7. Lucy has been having a hard time, because the experience at the hospital was so traumatic for her. It makes me sad that my formerly laid back baby is now so fussy and unhappy, but it has seemed to improve every day this week. We're praying that the Lord will give her peace in her heart and erase every memory of what she went through from her mind. Most of all we are grateful to the Lord that she is home and healthy.

MCM has been a trooper through all of this - especially the fact that Mommy was gone for 5 days - much longer than any time we've been apart before. She is such a sweetheart. She understood that Lucy was sick and every time I talked to her on the phone she would ask, "Sister? Sister?" trying to make sure Lucy was okay. I know they are going to have a special relationship one day!

We're all glad to be together again, especially because this week was MCM's second birthday! We'll be having an official celebration this weekend, and maybe I'll actually have time to post pictures of that one promptly. Happy birthday MCM!

Wordless Wednesday

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 18:34:00 +0000

Don't you wish you could be this happy every day?

The Many Faces of Lucy

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 00:57:00 +0000

The alien face...

Okay, I'm not even sure what to call this one. It just makes me laugh.

"Whatchu talkin' 'bout Willis?"

I promise she really is a very pretty baby. For some reason I can't seem to get a good picture of her! Last week she broke out in a horrible case of baby acne that was still hanging around for these pictures. This week it's clearing up, but of course I have yet to pull out my camera. I guess it's true that it's nearly impossible to take as many pictures of the second baby as you did of the first. I'm going to try though!

I really would love to write more, but I'm not sure when that's going to happen...

The New Normal

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 18:53:00 +0000

"Cheese."

Isn't she so pretty?

Like a little model with her intense gaze.

And her sister, looking very Brown family-esque if you ask me.

It's hard to get a good picture of a baby lying down. Can you see the color of her hair though? Dark blonde. So pretty with those navy blue eyes!

I know you all just really want to see pictures, and I'm trying to stay on top of that.

Life has been a little crazy around here. Generally speaking, I know the next 6 months to, let's face it, a year are going to be crazy. The first year of a child's life is pretty consuming for the dedicated parent. I remember referring to MCM's first year as "her" year. I realized that no matter what plans I had, things were basically about her - especially because she's a bit of a high maintenance girl. This year, will likely be similar, although I expect it to tax me in a new way as I hope to dedicate as much time and energy to LCM's special year, while never letting MCM feel as if she's taken the back-burner. It's hard. Really, really, hard.

MCM and I are extremely close...as close as I could imagine being to any child. I wouldn't trade that for the world, but I do think it makes it extra hard for her to let go of me a little bit. I don't feel like she's missed out on attention much at all - Lord knows, I've been killing myself to spend every free minute with her. But, I can see that it makes her feel a little insecure when she sees me hold and care for LCM. In fact, those are the moments she wants to sit in my lap, be picked up, or have me sit and play with her.

Being the sweet girl that she is, none of this has affected her feelings toward her baby sister. She loves her and does nothing but try to cuddle her and kiss her - and of course cries every time LCM cries. (Empathy is good, I know, but must it be so loud??) However, she has been throwing her inner sense of animosity straight at her Mommy, and it has definitely been a difficult time for both of us.

I know we're in a new phase, and we're all adjusting to the new normal around here, but can anyone tell me exactly how long it might take her to adjust to things? Tips, advice, commiseration are especially appreciated from those who would describe any of their children as "spirited" or "high needs" or "strong willed"...

Sisters

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Sat, 30 May 2009 14:12:00 +0000

Blurry, yes, but still cute. You also can't tell, but LCM is tucked in the sling behind MCM. Promise she wasn't suffocating, just sleeping.

Biiiiig yawn. She sleeps a lot...so far.

MCM is working hard to be the best big sister ever. Honestly, she seems to love her sister and is definitely growing into quite a little nurturer. Such a sweetheart.

LCM doesn't seem to mind all the kisses and hugs she gets from her big sister either. She seems to be a pretty laid back girl. Other than that, I'm afraid to make pronouncements about her temperament. All I can say is that it's apparent that they have very different little personalities, and one of them is keeping me lots busier than the other. You can probably guess which one...

Promise a real update is coming soon! Gotta go feed a baby though...

At the doctor...

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Fri, 22 May 2009 12:54:00 +0000

LCM had her first doctor's appointment Wednesday. MCM came too with my Mom to watch out for her. She was pretty interested in making sure LCM was okay, and I think she was really glad it wasn't an appointment where she is the one being fooled with. Guess what though? It's really hard to get a decent picture of two little ones!!

LCM doesn't like things like diaper changes and doctor's exams, but she barely cried at the doctor! She lost 6 oz before we left the hospital, but she regained 12 oz the first week at home and grew a half inch! Yay for LCM! My milk came in the day we got home, but it always SO feels good to hear that your baby is growing like she should! Other than that, there's not much to tell about our appointment. She looks healthy and normal. Right now she's eating great and sleeping most of the time. I still feel like it's too early to make proclamations about her temperament, but she has been nothing but laid back and as sweet as can be. It has really been a pleasure to savor her smallness and sweetness. She is just so tiny and delicate and beautiful! I am having a blast with MCM as she gets older - probably now more than ever - but I also feel like I'm able to appreciate LCM's babyhood in a way that I couldn't with MCM. I was such a stressed out new Mommy!

Big sister keeping an eye on little sister. She does NOT like hearing LCM cry! She says, "Mama, help!" when LCM really gets going. She has such a compassionate little heart. :)

Another attempt to get MCM to say "cheese" and poor LCM looking like a munchkin in the car seat.

Sweet girls.

Big Sister

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Fri, 22 May 2009 00:18:00 +0000

This is MCM's "big sister" present - her first Thomas the Train set. She's been a fan of the choo choo for a while, but she is SO excited to have "Tommy" in her very own house now.

The hat is courtesy of LCM - the newborn cap she wore at the hospital. MCM likes to put it on her head and the whip it off and wear it herself. Ahh, sisters. :)

Birth Story

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Sun, 17 May 2009 00:12:00 +0000

I know you're curious, or at least I always am when someone I know has a baby! So, here's the story. There probably will be some details that won't be appreciated by the opposite sex, so bear with me or skip reading if you want to.

Last Tuesday (one week ago!) I went in for my weekly doctor's appointment. I was dilated to 2 cm, which I had been for the 2 previous weeks, about 50 percent effaced and the baby was very low. Still, things had been like that for a while. I was feeling VERY pregnant and anxious about when this baby was going to arrive, not to mention huge, uncomfortable and tired. My doctor offered to sweep my membranes during the exam, quickly separates the lower part of the amniotic sac from the uterus. It's not a big deal (some people think it's quite painful, but for me it was not) but it is known to stir up hormones that will induce labor in women whose bodies are otherwise ready. I hadn't thought about it a lot, but I gave the go ahead and my doctor said he predicted he'd see me in the morning to have a baby.

That afternoon I felt fairly normal, and in the evening I actually felt as if I had fewer contractions than previous evenings. I was able to get a mostly full night's sleep but awoke around 4:30 AM to contractions that were just different enough from what I'd been having to alert me that they might be the real deal. By 5:30 AM or so I woke Leland up to let him know that I thought today was the day. The contractions were coming about 5 minutes apart, a minute to a minute and a half long, but they were manageable at that point. We were both able to get up and shower, pack last minute things, call our families and even got to spend a few minutes with MCM when she woke up. It meant so much to me to be able to hug her and tell her that we'd see her a little later on that day!

We headed to the hospital around 7:15 AM, and by then my contractions were becoming fairly intense. They were about every 4 minutes, and of course the car ride made them a little more powerful. We had no real idea where we were going when we got to the hospital, which was ridiculous! I was definitely thinking I'd be crawling down the hallway if they didn't get me where I needed to go via wheelchair! Then we had to spend an inordinate amount of time in triage while we waited for the nurses to "make a plan" and "prepare a room" for us. Pretty annoying. By the time they checked, I was dilated between 4 1/2 and 5 - a little earlier in labor than I'd hoped to be at the hospital, but of course I was assured that with your second labor things will go in half the time they did during the first go around. Plus, I was positive for group B strep and knew the doctor would want to get at least one round of antibiotics in me before the baby was born.

There was a lot of hospital hoopla, paperwork, waiting, monitoring, having to be stuck in the bed when the most comfortable position for me to labor was standing up and leaning over the bed when I needed to. My contractions followed a nice pattern and never slowed too terribly, but I definitely think things would've moved faster if I hadn't been stuck in bed for so long. By the time we were able to walk around, things started moving more quickly. I had planned to have an unmedicated birth this time, but I don't think the nurses really believed me until I was dilated to 7 cm and still somehow managing to remain remarkably calm and controlled during the contractions. Thank God there are breaks between contractions, because otherwise I don't think I would've survived. I just tried to completely relax and zone out and let my body do it's job. It worked! I will say that I was feeling pretty proud of myself and even had some moments there where I thought I might actually deliver this baby without getting to a point where I thought I would completely lose it from the pain. I was wrong!

My doctor came in when the nurses had decided I was about 8 cm dilated. This was around 1:00 PM. Mind you, they brought in everything for the delivery around noon, because they were completely convinced that I was going to speed through the transition phase of labor and this baby would be born fast! I decided to let the doctor break my water and was totally thinking I'd have LCM within the hour. Not so. My contractions majorly intensified at this point, and I don't even know what to say about it except that it was the worst pain of my entire life, and it only got worse. For some reason my body just wasn't progressing past 8 cm, even though every sign pointed to the fact that this baby was going to be born soon! 2:00 PM rolled by. 3:00 PM rolled by. I still was fortunate to have breaks between my contractions where I could relax as much as possible, but when they came, they came hard and long...it. was. horrible. I was finally starting to lose confidence in my ability to get through it, especially because I was so tired, hungry, worn out and mentally losing focus at that point. Leland, my Mom and my sister were there with me, and I honestly could not have done it without them. Just having them there was a huge support.

4:00 PM came, and I was starting to feel some pressure with each contraction. It was subtle at first, and I still wasn't completely dilated. (Apparently it's a pretty dangerous situation if you feel the need to push without being completely dilated. The nurse said I could rupture my cervix, and I'm like, Oh great! Thanks for giving me something else to worry about!) Then, from one contraction to the next, I felt a major, uncontrollable urge to push. In fact, it was like my body was actually pushing without me even trying. It was insane!!! Somehow the doctor showed up right then, and it felt like everyone moved so quickly. I'm not sure if they even checked to see if I was 10 cm. I was ready to get the baby out! Pushing actually felt better, because it distracted me from the pain of the contractions. I just wanted to work hard, because I was SO ready to hold LCM and for all of it to be over. After about 30 minutes, Lucy's head was about to make an appearance. I kept hearing everyone saying how much hair she had, and I wanted to see that little girl so badly! So, after another big push, her head came out and the rest of her with it. It was so amazing!! They gave her right to me, and I was able to hold for what seemed like an extra long time. The first thing I noticed was her very long fingers and little hands that looked just like mine. What a precious girl!!

It felt like my body was in shock, but it was over! I didn't have to push the placenta out. I guess it just happened on it's own. I was too busy being thrilled it was over, snuggling LCM and just being amazed that I survived that ordeal!! I think Leland was in shock too. It was such an incredible, intense day. 12 hours we spent in active labor...at least 5 of those being focused, difficult, very painful, and just crazy!

Let me tell you, afterward I think the fear of God was scared into me a bit. I could not have looked over at my sister and said, "You should do this too!" I'll admit, part of me was thinking unmedicated birth is not necessarily worth it! I was just so in shock over the pain I had endured and how intense the whole experience was! However, I will say that the benefits for me have been entirely in hindsight. After that 12 hours was over, I felt better remarkably soon. I was able to get up and go to the bathroom by myself, shower by myself, and take care of myself and the baby. With MCM I literally could not get out of bed for hours because of the epidural. I had to be catheterized because I couldn't get up. I could barely walk to the bathroom and certainly needed assistance getting anywhere and doing anything. Maybe it was because I am so small and I got the epidural pretty late in my labor with her. I'm not sure. All I know is, I felt really weird and out of it emotionally and physically.

The day LCM was born, I felt remarkably well, and the next day after that, I felt downright energetic. Emotionally and physically, I feel so much more connected to everything that has happened. I've been able to play with MCM, care for LCM and have just been mostly like my normal self, except for the expected tiredness. LCM was also incredibly awake and alert after the birth, which made interacting with her that much more special.

My sister says the way I have been after this birth experience is night and day compared to the first go around, and she was there to witness the whole ordeal. Will I do it again? Probably. Because the most important thing is not those 12 hours, it's the weeks afterward. For me, this has been a really wonderful experience. When you have a busy almost-two-year-old, feeling good after coming home from the hospital is priceless.

I could literally blab on and on, but it's taken me days just to get this information together. More later. Lots to come, and of course more pictures.

Introducing...

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Sat, 16 May 2009 23:17:00 +0000

Lucy Camille
born
May 13, 2009
at 4:51 PM
6 lb, 6 oz
19 1/2 in

What a beauty!

Itty bitty fingers...

She looks like the spitting image of her mommy's newborn pictures and surprisingly not as much like her big sister as we thought!

MCM giving LCM her first hug and kiss.

Heading home from the hospital with our new precious girl!

Wow, I don't even know where to begin! We had quite an exciting week around here. We're home and settling in with our new little girl, and we feel richly blessed! I am thankful and amazed that I was able to have an unmedicated delivery and now have an utterly healthy and beautiful baby girl! May 13, 2009 goes down in history as probably the hardest day of my entire life, but now I am feeling great. Tired - of course - we're doing sell around here. Gotta run right now, but I'll let you know the rest of the story SOON!

Pictures from Purgatory

noreply@blogger.com (Courtney) — Mon, 11 May 2009 12:02:00 +0000

These pictures are from a little post-nap Saturday afternoon visit to BT and KK's house. Please notice how much hair MCM has all the sudden!

She found a treasure - a rock.

This is a little thing I like to call "riding the bump." It makes such a nice seat for her.

She's just so dern pretty. And she was fascinated by watching BT work in the yard. She just learned to say his name and pretty much says it over and over and over.

That's not a basketball under my shirt. It's a real baby in there, folks.

We're still here. It's just hard to write anything when I'm spending every day expending energy in hopes that today is THE day. So far, no luck. It seems that this little girl is quite content in the womb. My doctor even went so far as to say, "I've got to be honest and say that it doesn't really look like you're going to have a baby any day now...maybe this is just a due date baby."

Of course, that's all normal for anyone else. I guess I just didn't realize how much having MCM early skewed my perception of what is normal. Somehow going all the way to 40 weeks seems almost intolerable. But, here I am at 39 weeks. No signs of baby, so I might be writing this all again next Monday, with my little bun tucked safely in the oven.

The good thing is, everything continues to look healthy and completely normal. She is still moving around like crazy, growing each week, and putting on the pounds. I know she's going to be a little bigger than MCM was when she was born, just hopefully not too big! As long as everything continues to look good, and I'm not going crazy from pregnancy clausterphobia, we won't consider inducing until I'm well past my due date. Oh, how I hope she decides to come on her own though!!

We are VERY excited about meeting our little girl, and the waiting stinks! However, we have been blessed to have some very sweet times with MCM over the past few weeks. It is absolutely amazing how much she has matured in the past month or so. She has so many new words, I can't keep up! This newfound ability to communicate seems to satisfy her on so many levels. It's neat to be able to communicate more clearly and effectively with her and to see how excited she is when she is understood. She has a silly sense of humor and is always trying to make us laugh. She is also very sensitive and quick to snuggle and love whenever given the opportunity. We've survived the past few weeks of me being VERY tired and pregnant by spending a lot of time snuggling and watching movies. There was a time I would've thought that wasn't an acceptable use of time, but it is a lifesaver. Even as I type, it's 7:30 AM...MCM woke up at 6:15, and she's snuggled in the bed next to me watching Jungle Book. If we weren't watching this, she would be asking me to chase her up and down the hallways, and in my current state, it's just a bit too early for that amount of action.

Somehow, the little power struggles we were having a few months ago seem to have sorted themselves out. Even her sleep has turned into a pretty easy ballgame, and that is AMAZING after all we've been through. The big girl bed is the best thing that's every happened to her, I think. She is so ready to go down for her afternoon nap, it's all I can do to delay it to 12 or 1 o'clock. She literally crawls into the bed, lays her head on the pillow and is practically out cold by the time I turn off the light. And at night we have such a nice bedtime routine...she loves nothing more than for Leland or I to snuggle in bed with her, read books and say prayers. It really is such a sweet time each night.

*Just to encourage parents of sleepless babies out there - the ones who are STILL not sleeping through the night at a year old or more, it will even out! It has for us. MCM was 13 months old when she started sleeping through the night, and she is no worse for the wear. We survived too, and you better believe I'm going to be reminding myself of this when I'm waking up with baby #2 every couple hours at night!

So, here we are, trying to enjoy each day that we have as parents to the sweetest little girl in the world, while trying to contain our anticipation and excitement about having another precious girl any day now. The waiting is literally killing us, but what can you do? My parents are in town this week to hold vigil with us and help with MCM. It will be a welcome distraction to have them here, and we really hope to have a baby before they must go home!