6.2': Bullet, Single Tea and Butter Biscuit

Vijay, VijayKant and SuryaKant - Velayudham and 7Am Arivu

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 13:34:00 +0000

Parameter	Velayudham	7am Arivu	Hypothetical Vijay’Kant’ movie
Similarities
Story	Vijay vs Pakistan Theevaravadhigal	Surya Vs Chinees Theevaravadhigal	Vijaykant vs Pakistan theevaravadhigal
Hero	Vijay who is a milk man and transforms into Velayudham the superhero	Surya who is a circus performer and transforms into Bodhidharman the superhero	VijayKant, no transformation. Always a police/army/intelligence guy
Heroine	His sondhakara ponnu who loves him.	The girl who does fancy research into genetic engineering and awakens bodhidharman sleeping in surya	Some random girl who chases gabtun and falls for him
Additional heroine	The girl who makes vijay into Velayudham and has a crush on him	None. Director is focused	Could be the gramathu ponnu who loves gabtun but is secondary to the heroine who is there for skin show
Differentiators
Villain	Pakistan theevaravathigal plus the corrupt politician	Villan as powerful as the hero, Chinees. But then underutilized till the climax	An army of Pakistan Theevaravathigal
Premise	Villain wants to create chaos by bombing	Biological warfare used by China against India	Kill a politician or some big shot or poor innocent civilians using usual bombs and aruval etc.
Punch quotient.	Medium. Vijay uses it only to promote himself. Subtle political agenda – Anna hazarae ish	Subtle but overloaded towards the end. Promoting Tamils and also sri lankan issue.	From start to finish. DMDK agenda
Sex Quotient	Only heroine. No one wants to watch Vijay Shirtless	For women only. Surya is shirtless. Inspired by Salman Khan	Only heroine. One item song mandatory
Sentiment Quotient	Overloaded sister sentiment	Restrained use of sentiment. Mother sentiment there only in one scene.	All forms, mother, sister, brother, nation.

So basically all three movies are similar, with almost identical story lines. The director can just play around with the superficial aspects to differentiate the movies. And of course each director within the very tight constraints adds his own directorial touches to differentiate the movies. This is something like the icing on the cake to make it different from the other.

Velayudham

There is a love triangle, this of course allows for the director to have some distractions. This allows the director to juxtapose the urbane genelia against the Pattikattu Hanshika Motawani. Of course this also allows for the audience to have different faces during the songs. Some relief for the audience, because after 5 minutes the women get boring no? Next time vijay should have different women for each of the songs. Next of course is the sister sentiment. It triumphs over all other forms of sentiments. Saranya Mohan is the new irritating sister in movies.

Of course the creation of Tamil Cinemas first superhero. Velayudham. Vijay wears a costume protects his identity and all in this movie. His sidekick is Genelia, just like how Batman has an Alfred.

This also is a super crucial movie for Vijay. He puts an end to all confusion and says that he is a superhero who wears his underwear inside his pants.

And of course the director says its time for women to take the lead, hence in one scene Hanshika Motawani mixes Viagra and gives it to vijay. This is sex education, not the shit Selvaraghavan shows in Mayakam Enna.

Moral of the movie - Like all good tamil movies, this one too preaches. This one is very Anna Hazaraeesq. It says that if we wish to root out corruption we have to act now and not depend on some superhero

7 Am Aarivu.

Since the Director can’t be reduced to producing storylines like Vijay movies, and Surya is one up on Vijay. He acts in movies which take a Vijay/Vijay’Kant” story and repackage it using some masala, are shot in a much more slick manner and of course where the hero is not as cheri as the other two.

This does leave little room for the director to show his great skill. The director first differentiates by showing the story of Bodhidharman and all. He also adds some stuff about Nooku Varmam when the person can control another person’s mind by looking into their eyes and all. What next Kaama Varmam? Now that is usually done only in serious tamil movies, think Dasavaratham or Aayirithil Oruvan by Selvaraghavan. Of course there is also the added element of mumbo jumbo in the form of biological warfare and all. Bombs, Aruval and all are for the Vijays and Vijaykants not Surya.

The director also understands that Surya is the Tamil Cinema equivalent of Salman Khan, so he has a good 40 minutes of bare-chested Surya, just for the women, usually its skimpy women for the male front benchers. Of course since Shruthi Hasan is a Kamal’s daughter and all, she is assumed to have brains and hence doesn’t indulge in skin show, but she forgets that her father could act and speak proper tamil.

But if all this garbage is removed, the movie is no different from Velayudham. Just that the level of punch dialogues are lower and it is not about promoting the hero but more to do with patriotism and tamil culture etc. Both Surya and Shruthi Hasan have equal share in dialogues, that of course is not common.

Moral of the movie – never forget your past culture etc. the usual blah.

7 Am Arivu requires a vijay movieish treatment with punch dialogues and vijay acting cheri. Surya and all isn’t suited for the movie.

And bottom line is all the movies trace their roots to Vijaykanth movies, there is Vijay, Vijay’cant’ and Surya’cant’

Raavanan - The Love Child of Mani Ratnam

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 05:12:00 +0000

Raavanan in Tamil probably alludes to Mani Ratnam belief that the Tamil audience are akin to a bastard child. The movie has a very north Indianish feel, considering Veera is from Thirunelveli district. The costumes and backdrop, every time the movie shifts out of the forest feels north Indianish. It does feel like watching a movie dubbed from Hindi.
Apart from this grouse, if viewed within certain constraints, the movie is a half decent attempt at interpreting the Ramayana. The lines between Ram and Raavanan blur with Rama killing Vibeeshana, while Raavana is projected as a benevolent king ruling over his Lanka. The attempt at humanising Ram and Raavana along with Sita not being portrayed as the worshipful wife is shallow and superficial. Greying the Ramayana is definitely an interesting attempt, but the Ramayana has a very light shade of grey, not sufficient to lift the movie. The intentions and ideas are in the right direction, but execution is half hearted, focusing on peripheral areas while missing the core content.Interpersonal relationship between the characters is not dwelled on, while Santosh Sivan has been given unreasonable footage to display his skills, detracting time for the development of the story. Devoid of the Ramayana parallels and interpretation, the movie lacks the pace and depth required for a kidnap drama with a naxal backdrop. None of the characters are developed, all of them emerging as full grown individuals, with their backstory left to the audience’s imagination. Without the parallel the movie is reduced to a slow paced kidnap drama without the suspense of a kidnap drama with excellent cinematography, reducing it to Mani Ratnam indulging his whimsical fantasies and desires.

Tamil audience is the bastard child of Mani Ratnam and Raavan. The original child is now the bastard, while the bastard is the crown prince. It could also be added, this is akin to the beginning of Mani Ratnams phase similar to Balachanders post Sindhi Bhiravi phase.

PS: Opinions on any movie are a function of expectations.

XXIVC-1

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Mon, 24 May 2010 09:41:00 +0000

Stability is the desire for constant in human existence. Change often is viewed with contempt; certainty is sought as a sign of risk aversion. Permanency is loved and sought. There is the constant search for permanency, but it shall never be found for it never exists. The desire for permanency manifests itself in the acceptance of various social norms and actions, some purely physical and some more intangible. The search for permanency in the ocean of chaos is an exercise in futility. This exercise in is often the sole purpose of homo sapien existence for most, for in this search this search ultimately leads the homo sapien species survive. Most though tend to find some form of stability within volatility. The absolute rejection of volatility and embracing stability is the beginning of the end. It is an indication of decay, when decay will begin from within. This is the beginning of decay and collapse into the morass of mediocrity. Searching for stability and permanency in life is an exercise in futility.

PS: The old tag line of my blog was "Nirandhiram oru Dhandanai - Stability is a Curse"

XIX - Maminess

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Fri, 07 May 2010 10:59:00 +0000

Maminess is defined by a state of mind and not by age. Maminess is conforming to a state of conditioning and adhering to it due to externalities penalizing non adherence. This breeds a sense of chronic risk aversion and hence not stepping out of comfort zones. Admitting to conforming to norms of course is not always easy to digest, hence the entire mami system provides for a mechanism to break the norms to satiate the needs to provide the individual with the illusion of venturing beyond the system, yet remaining within the system. All eccentricities unless otherwise the within the boundaries allowed are to be curtailed. Maminess or those who adhere to it are allowed to build the superstructure of their lives as they please, but of course they shy away from molding the core. Maminess is living within the illusion of not running the rat race, yet running it.

PS: Maminess/Mamaness can be interchangeably used

XIIXX-X

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 03:42:00 +0000

The fundamental purpose of existence of the entire homosapien race is identical that of every other species, namely ensuring the survival of the species. The dominance of the species in the planet that the individual members of the attaining their goal is inconsequential to the larger outcome of ensuring the species survival. This though has created a lack of self importance and a desire to not follow the herd for some members of the species. This group tends to differentiate itself by trying to change or contribute towards the larger societal fabric that the entire species has created and strives to stand out from the herd. This hence has resulted in the lot not understanding its purpose of existence at all, but rather in believing that the social fabric created by the entire species to try and find an alternative purpose for its existence. Ultimately, both sets fail in their pursuit, the group claiming to be above the herd just manages boost its ego, without realizing there are just two options, either to opt in with the herd or to opt in with the herd with the knowledge of its futility. The futile attempt at opting out by the segment claiming to be above the herd is recursive and futile. The recursive futility of the social fabric is overpowering.

Herd is Always Right

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 05:32:00 +0000

Gamblers love to gamble. They though know the risks they undertake and are well aware when they are betting against the odds. Everyone is keen to go long and bet against the odds. This is the most interesting bet Ive come across. The bet is only long, and secondly, it is based on short term information that this bet is made. It is a forecast. Making this audacious forecast of going long based on short term certainty and the continuation of status quo in the long term is certainly betting against the odds. As the nature of the bet is, no one who makes the bet ever realizes that they are going long on an ideal short bet and secondly, they do not also realize they are betting against the odds. Since it is a bet everyone makes, it is the norm. Norms are decided by the herd, and the herd is never wrong. Such are the truisms of existence in societies.

Vinai Thandi Varuvaiya.....Vandhi Thaan Varuthu

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Sun, 28 Feb 2010 03:36:00 +0000

Vinai Thandi Varuvaiya is a brilliant movie. I loved it. Its awesome. Largely because after a long time I wanted to write and post on this blog. The last time a movie did that to me was way back when I saw Sakkarakatti. Its over 18 months ago. Before I start the Mujik. Someone please give Gautham Menon a book on Flirting for Dummies. he needs to read it before writing scripts, even if he sucks in real life.

Now Below Starts Mujik.

The story of the movie is simple. It is the old story in all usual Tamil Movies. Boy loves girl, boy is hindu, girl is Christian, parental opposition, and girl marries someone else. In the midst of this the boy goes after his dream, and becomes a film director, makes a movie out of his story and achieves his dream.

Indha padatha partha dhaan enakku Vadivelu’s famous dialogue “ethivittu Ethivittu, odambai ranagalam akkittangla” oda artham puriyathu. Gautham Menon’ai ethivittu oru Mani Ratnam range ku build up kuduthu avarai ippidi oru padam eduthurukkar.

I hear it being mentioned the movie is inspired by Gautham Menons first love, Im wondering if it is first love or the losing his virginity inspired him. Essentially the movie has the subtle effect that the leading pair are in their mid 20s, horny and dying to have sex, but of course cant just have sex that easily, so mask and cloak it under the pretext of love and then are free to have sex. So essentially it is about the director losing his virginity, one inference I can draw is that he didn’t go to a prostitute and lose his virginity.

All Vijay fans should watch this movie, it will make them nostalgic about the late 90s Vijay movies. In the late 90s he acted in movies where he would love a girl at first sight, and then run after hear, have dream songs etc and generally about love happens only once etc in the movie. This movie is the same thing, add a little bit of style to it, some polish, class to the leading lady, an ugly male hero (vijay-a replace panna, korangu madri dhanae irukkanom?), and add ARR music and viola it is a new movie all together.

Simbu has been renamed as “Young Super Star” from “Little Super Star” the circular logo shit he had has disappeared. Did he hire a marketing consultant? Or did he realize he is no longer little?

Gautham Menon said in this movie Simbu has adaki Vasuchified. Andha change indha opening credit pattam madri mottum dhaan teriyaradhu

Ippo dhaan puriyathu. “Little Super Star” is a moralistic and virtuous young man. Whose little finger also wont touch the girl (Tamil padam ellathulaiyum vara dialogue “Ennoda sundu veral koodai avalai thothuthu illai), except in songs when the “Little Super Star” has the freedom to indulge in foreplay with the leading lady, except both of them have their clothes on. In this movie though Simbu declares that he just wants Guilt free sex hence doesn’t go with the image of “Little Super Star” so has changed the title. Brilliant marketing idea. Creating two independent brands.

Simbu ku ella padathulaiyum oru 3-4 women in minimal clothing irundhu pazkham pola irukku. Here there is a short fall, only Trisha and in Sarees, hence the guys subconscious horniness comes to the forefront. In everyscene he is just waiting to get an opportunity to lunge at trisha and make out. Gautham Menon could have spared us this torture by having at least 1 item song.

In the entire movie, the director emphasizes on the pain of love, how it is delusional and a high. I can certainly empathise with him, especially when Simbu says that, I can feel the pain in myself, the torment and the torture. Especially since I am wondering why did I get fooled by Gautham Menon to watch a Simbu movie and the pain this movie is inflicting on me. Enakkum andha Vali teriyaradhu.

This pain I guess is to make everyone who watches the movie, whether they are in love or not appreciate the beauty of being in love or lust, or whatever, or even the need to get laid. Those are the key take aways from the movie :D

Simbu in all scenes when he is declaring his undying love and interacting with Trisha, seems constipated and is clearly just waiting to claw at her. Simbu of course acts cheap and goes ahead and molests Trisha, despite her protests in a Train. Enna oru pudhaimai. I bet no one taught of this before Gautham Menon. Maybe it is Simbu unable to control his sexual urges and seeking a release suggested it to Gautham Menon, who thrust it down Trisha’s throat. Trisha maybe agreed since she had no opportunity to let her sexual urges out by wearing minimal clothing in the movie also agreed.

Gautham Menon is an intelligent man. In all his movies he has some pudhumai. In Kakha Kakha it was sleek editing. Minnalae it was that 5 days is a lifetime, and if you hang out with a girl for 5 days, its like one has had a live in relationship and that hence has the right of first refusal to get married to her. In this movie the message keeps changing.

First Gautham Menon I Thought said “Premaritial Sex is fine as long as the people intend to get married”
Then it changes “Premaritial Sex might not be all that alright, but making out is”
Then The subtle message is “Love is just an excuse for lust and a lack of sex, so create that excuse and make out”

The message indeed is new, since it involves sex and pre maritial sex. If he had stuck to the first one, Kushboo would have been proud and NACO could have used it to control AIDS. NACO could have launched a campaign trying to push the punithamana kaadhal, deivamana kaadhal and andha kaathalargal oda dhaan dhambadhaya uruvu vechirukkanom.

Indha padathula innoru Pudhumai enna na, Gautham Menon takes his love for portraying female sexuality and bringing it to the open a step further, he has Trisha talking about sex and making out. It all began with Kakha Kakha, where Jyothika declared her love, in Vaaranam Ayiram, Ramya declared her love to Surya (maybe Surya does not have the balls to declare his love to his leading ladies) here its taken a step further and Trisha speaks about the kiss with Simbu. Idhu oru pudhumai.

Usuala ella padathulaiyum, hero oda oru 4 koojas iruppanga, avanga ellam andha hero oda vaisule dhaan iruppanga, indha padathule the kooja for the hero is his friend philosopher and guide a middle aged man who is a cinematographer. The movie has lots of such small innovations, it’s like a drop of water in bucket, but drops of water only fill the bucket no?

Counting all the small small innovations of Gautham Menon

Hero oda kooja is ungle
Hero tells heroine he wants to make love to her all the time
Hero and heroine are shown having guilt free sex without it being hyped
Heroine is shown in Sarees
Heroine is older than the hero
There is no line saying “punithamana, deivamana kaadhal” etc in the movie, all tamil movies have that.
Heroine is open about her horniess too.
ARR being inspired by Pink Floyd with Aramolae song.
The hero’s kooja makes a sutble reference to older women being better in bed. This is something new. Just that that the heroine is a karpuku arasi in the movie and is shown as having no prior experience.
Innoru pudhumai enna na in all tamil movies the leading lady in the movie is a “Karpuku-Arasi” who is virtuous etc, but in the songs suddenly performs soft porn, in this movie that does not happen.

Gautham Menon has shown tremendous restraint, he has controlled is urge to kill either of the leading pair. He usually does that.

End of the movie there was standing ovation for the director, the entire audience clapped because the movie is finally over and they can run out of the theatre.

In summation, Vinai Thandi Varuvaiya is Vandhi Thaan Varuthu.

A Typical Mylapore Story - Part 3

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 15:54:00 +0000

Its been 10 months since I first started writing it, well I didnt know how to end it and finally figured it out.

Part-2

He had money; he did not know how to spend it. It was his maadaveedhi upbringing, counting every penny he spent. He chooses to live in a small two bedroom apartment in the city of Madras. His wife too was of a similar upbringing, but for her the money had a purpose. For her the money was a sign of societal status. Growing up in a lower middle class family, she lacked financial strength. The money mattered to her. She would not step into a five star restaurant for dinner, but the knowledge that she could afford such a dinner gave her power. She did not want the Mercedes, she was content with a second hand Hyundai, but the knowledge that she could buy a Mercedes if she needed to gave her a sense of fulfillment.

The void soon filled his existence. Every time he looked at his wife, he envied her. She seemed to have filled her void, family and financial security seemed to suffice for her. It was not for him. He desired more. His professional success nor his family filled the void. It always reappeared. He realized the void is what kept pushing him to push himself. He owed his success to fill the void. He had spent his entire life meeting societal norms, he had met their norms. The fog of mediocrity had engulfed him, his neck was above the fog, but he was still a part of it. He was pulled down by the weight of mediocrity. He needed to break free from it. The fog of mediocrity arose out of his feeling that his life had no purpose.
He was walking down the streets, he saw an old man lying on the pavement, not an uncommon sight in Indian streets. The old man’s worldly possessions, he wondered probably consisted of the bag he used as a pillow. The man probably had a family, probably had kids, who had deserted him. The old man’s daily struggle for three meals kept him busy.

The old man was not different from him, he too had the same concerns, food, feeding his family well when he had one and kids. The similar concerns which dominated most of his existence, he was just better than the old man at meeting these goals.

It seemed to him that the entire purpose of his life was to procreate. Help the homo sapiens species survive. In this process it was upto him to feed his family, in the paternal society the Homo Sapiens had built. It was the same objective as the rest of the world, within this objective he had tried hard to distinguish himself, and he had succeeded. The entire construction was built on an illusion driven by a strong desire to distinguish him from the herd.

He desired to seem different; he started companies, reveled in material comforts, his huge bank balance made him seem different, but his ultimate objective was the same as the old homeless man on the pavement. Despite his attempts to differentiate himself, he was drawn subconsciously towards the only motive of his life, because it’s the only purpose for the existence of the Homo Sapiens, just like all life. Since the beginning of life, all species had the same objective, and will continue to have the same purpose for as long as life exists. He realized he had gone behind an illusion which did not exist, and believed the illusion was real and meaningful.

His existence here onwards was waiting for his body to degenerate, disintegrate and collapse. He had been extreamely successful at the only objective he could have in life, survival and procreation. Now he was literally useless, his sole purpose of existence, ensuring the survival of the homo sapiens had been met. He was no different from every other species on the planet. He had a wait, probably a long wait ahead of him, though he wished it came sooner for he felt useless.

A Typical Mylapore Story - 2

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 16:43:00 +0000

Part one can be read here

Soon he had kids, his family in India was happy. His dad was overjoyed. His mom was ecstatic. His family in India were overjoyed that their family tree would exist and not die. He was born to procreate and ensure the survival of the human race. Even if he disappeared from this moment, he would have fulfilled his destiny. But the human race has created the entire web called society and that prevented him for disappearing, it held him back.

His wife too was overjoyed; the kids were a validation of her feminity and fertility. Now being a mother felt reassuring to her. She decided to give up her job to become a full time mother. Her kids and husband were the center of her life now. He believed she stood out in the crowd because she had a job and a life which did not center on him, but he was mistaken. She was above mediocrity, but did not want to stay afloat. It soon swallowed her. She wanted the satisfaction of having risen above it.

He realized as long as he was occupied and was under pressure personally or professionally the void did not seem prominent. When he was not, the void seemed very prominent. He would retrospect on his life; the void would emerge to fill his mind. Providing for his children kept him occupied, the void did not engulf him. He had to strive harder for that little bonus or increment. He strived hard to provide for his kids, achieving that he felt would fill the void he felt. He strived hard to provide his kids with all they desired. He did manage to do that. He though had to work that extra bit harder for that.

He was no longer the teenager who landed on the shores to pursue his dream. He was now a middle aged man, a successful corporate citizen, a responsible father and a loving husband. He had made enough money to financially secure his family. Yet he felt lonely, his wife seemed like a stranger. She could never understand the void that engulfed him. He was always restless, she thought he was weird. They were strangers coerced by marriage to live under one roof. Soon the void filled his existence, just when he thought he had wiped it out from his life, it reemerged to fill his existence.

A good friend made an offered him his escape route. His friend wanted him to join in his start up. It would entail moving back to India. His wife was overjoyed. She was never happy here, she longed for the streets and smells of India. She need not share a house with the stranger alone anymore. His children were studying in hostels. He did not have to risk his financial security, but would reap the gains if any. The deal seemed too hard to resist. He moved back to India.

The start up kept him busy the void disappeared from his existence. Luck had always favored him, through his life. He missed the IITs but got through to REC, he missed the top universities, but got through to an Ivy League university. He also got the job everyone desired, a wife who stood out in the crowd, and now he helped build a successful start up. The company was soon devoured by a larger firm. Small fish are always swallowed by bigger fish. He though did end up financially wealthier.

A Typical Mylapore Story - 1

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 16:00:00 +0000

For him, mornings always resonated with sounds of the temple, the thirupallaiyachi of Kesava Perumal Kovil. He lived in its madaveedhi. He longed to get out of the place, the air always had the smell of mediocrity and of middle aged mamis and mamas. He aspired for more than mediocrity. Living in the madaveedhi, the fog of mediocrity was wrapped around him like a blanket. He was in his tenth standard when he decided to pursue the engineering dream. He had seen his cousin and his neighbor leave the maadaveedhi by pursuing the engineering dream. He viewed them as having risen above the fog of mediocrity. They were now working with the company everyone wanted to, he desired for that. This he believed would help him rise above the fog. Like every aspiring engineer he aimed for the Indian Institutes of Technology. Like almost everyone, his aim was below the target, he had to settle for the Regional Engineering Colleges. He though had his ego intact, he was not going to any of the self financing private engineering colleges, and he got into the Regional Engineering College. He was finally out of the wretched madaveedhi, but not entirely. He did have to go back home during semester breaks, it was the entirety he desired.

He soon graduated and decided to pursue the American dream. He chose that over employment in the IT companies for he felt the back office employment was mediocre. Everyone in India seemed to be a part of the back office environment. It to him was again a sign of mediocrity. He did get into one of the Ivy League universities. He focused on passing his course and landing a job with a company everyone desired but could not get, he had to be above mediocrity which surrounded him like a thick fog preventing him from seeing beyond it. He believed rising above it was in professional success, he longed for that.

In the meantime, like all good obedient boys from maadaveedhi, while living in the USA he took a ten day break, saw a few girls who were acceptable to his family and settled in for an arranged marriage. He had to agree to an arranged marriage because he would never have been able to find a girl on his own for he is an arrogant, sub social, and egoistic character. His alpha male status hinged on his professional success, and it mattered most only in the arranged marriage market. He was ideally suited for the system.

He was a part of the crowd, the fog of mediocrity was wrapped around him, but he believed having the job everyone desired but could not get and a wife who would stand out in the crowd. This he believed had made him rise above the fog of mediocrity. To the outsider his life seemed perfect. But not to him, he always felt something was missing in his life, it had always been a void he could not understand. He believed that the job, a wife, money and professional success would fill the void. But they did not; the void only grew more prominent. He was now more aware of it than earlier.

Part 2 Can be read here

Tamil Bank Bernake and The Dollar

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 06:30:00 +0000

The Federal Reserve Board in the United States has made two drastic decisions over the past few weeks and months, both of which I feel present scope for us tamils to profiteer from. Firstly they seem to be giving banking licenses to anyone. The automotive financing arm of General Motors which sold bad cars to sub prime borrowers now has become a bank to raise deposits since its facing losses. So now it seems anyone can become a bank in the USA, all financial institutions seem eligible to become banks. Secondly, they cut the benchmark interest rates to between 0 and 0.25 percent.

Now, as a good Tamil financial investor I see a tremendous opportunity to profiteer from this. Short the dollar, long on emerging market currencies. But for this scheme to work, the stupid Chinese central bank which holds large reserves of the dollar, have to be suckered into this scheme. They are paranoid about losses from rising interest rates, and with falling interest rates are sitting pretty. This will be a challenge. This great scheme would require scale.

Tamilians have group and herd mentality, now we Tamils should apply to the Federal Reserve to become a bank holding company. Bernake of course is now under the belief that every financial institution is a bank and all banks are financial institutions.

This new bank will accept all contributions towards capital from its members, and in proportion to the contribution shares will be allotted. We are god-fearing conservative bankers, we cannot function without the blessing of Lord Venkatesa in Tirupati, the beggar god. We are also beggars just like him. We will have the TTD board also contribute towards the capital of the Tamil Investment Bank.

We will operate an elaborate currency desk out of New York. Fill it with our Tamil Brethren who have been kicked out of Wall Street. In Simple terms, we will borrow the dollar in the inter bank lending window at 0% interest rate, sell it, drive prices down, and buy it again to repay the loan. This will be the great dollar carry trade. Being the reserve currency, it won’t have the risks like the yen carry trade. Emerging markets where there is an outflow of portfolio investments have been increasing interest rates, we will borrow dollars and lend to these countries pocketing the difference.

When we reach scale, The Tamil Investment Bank would have suckered the Chinese into this grand scheme of shorting the dollar. The Chinese would start playing, driving the dollar even lower. This is when we the great tamils, will long the dollar, short emerging market currencies. With our action, using our clout on Wall Street, especially among the Indian community, and Obama who is now a Tamil at Heart, we will collectively long the dollar and short emerging market currencies. Since the Japs and Koreans hate the Chinese we can subtly have them join the party. In effect it will be a war in the financial markets, China vs the Indians, Japs and Koreans. We of course will be part of the stronger alliance and will win this war.

We Tamils being nationalists would have accomplished a great feat by the end of the cycle. China would find its reserves greatly diminished at the end if we screw them properly. We would have ruined them economically. We tamils would then go on to financially conquer the world, learning from our great ancestors like Raja Raja Chozhan.

Irrational Exuberance, Risk and Marriage Market

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 06:03:00 +0000

The financial crisis gripping the entire global economy has ended the era of irrational exuberance. The worst affected market is the marriage market. According to some informed reports circulated by my investment banker and friends in the financial services industry who are on the lookout, the market is now witnessing a drastic shift.

Ever since the IT boom and the rising global growth, the information technology and financial services industry has had the maximum recall potential on prospective mother in laws’ minds, fuelled by exponential salary increases mimicking the Sensex movements. This class also has been the darling of banks who have doled out irresistible loans, which resulted in them being viewed as well settled in the eyes of prospective mother in Laws eyes.

But now my friends tell me, it is not enough for the grooms to own a house or a car to snatch the best looking girl on the market, but they also have to show their household balance sheets to prospective bride’s families, which is being scrutinized by them for the leverages on their incomes.

Just like banks, my friends tell me, prospective brides’ families don’t like highly leveraged incomes since the future is uncertain. Prospective grooms who leveraged their incomes upwards of 10 and 15 times to buy the coveted duplex in the most desirable locality in the hope that a marriage would reduce the leverage are now faced with the prospect of having to meet the EMI payments. They also under the current credit crisis are not able to roll over debt since the cost of borrowing has risen exponentially.

My good friends tell me, the previously unattractive sectors of government employment and other old industries are now in vogue. Their there is no irrational exuberance, or lavish display of wealth, but the risks on the income I’m told are considerably lower. With prospective brides’ families becoming more risk averse after having burnt their fingers in the IT and boom in financial services, they are looking out for lower risk options with stable incomes, government services and old economy industry look attractive under current circumstances. My friends add, grooms from these sectors are also used to living frugally and saving, rather than spending, which is in vogue now, since borrowing costs have risen exponentially. Saving and frugal living seems to earn brownie points with prospective mother in laws now, in addition to lower debt and debt free assets in individual balance sheets.

PS Can someone verify if the risk taking prospective brides are preferring entrepreneurs over the rest? The downside risk can be high, but the upside will compensate for that. KK can you throw some light on that?

PPS: This post is entirely a work of fiction, I have just applied the global financial crises to the marriage market, with the help of Baidik and Siddharth

Religion and Tamil Investment Corporation

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 14:29:00 +0000

The subprime crises is here to stay, America is in the grip of recession, Europeans are following them, the British like all good allies have walked hand in hand with the Americans into recession. The Japs of course cant be far behind, they too will follow suit, dragging the Koreans and Australians into recession while the New Zealanders beat them to recession, which is not surprising considering there is only so much economic burden that the sheep can shoulder.

In all, it could get worse than the 1930s great depression. In the 1930 depression, the Chettiars, being good money lenders benefited from it. They decided the Zamindars and others in India were already squeezing the market, and so they targetted Myanmar, then Burma. In the depression, rice prices tanked, and viola, the moneylender took over the collateral, which was the land, by the mid 1930s, the Chettiars controlled 95% of the agricultural land in the country and were only forty or fifty thousand in number. After this the Burmese, got pissed with their money lenders and kicked them back to India.

Before this the Cholas conquered the South East Asian countries and established colonial outposts for trade. We Tamils being good traders always are more interested inorganic growth opportunities

We Tamils have a history of expanding our horizons beyond the Indian subcontinent, this time we should set our sights higher, I propose Wall Street. We tamils should take over global finance.

Now with the Tamil fascination for knowledge, there should be a great alliance of Tamil, and should use this opportunity of a Firesale on Wall Street to take over the all the financial institutions in Wall Street.

I propose the formation of a Tamil Investment Corporation. This corporation will be well capitalized by what ever little gold available inTamil households, and those who do part with their gold will be given shares in return. If the gold is insufficient to fund the bailout, we can ask the gods, literally. We Tamil are the religious, and we donate to temples, the temples are our source of wealth, I propose leveraging this wealth to buy out Wall Street. We will of course annex Tirupati and claim it as a part of greater Tamil Nadu. And being servants of god, we will give temples stake in our company.

The company with its divine mandate will improve temple wealth and serve the gods. The gods will also have a share in the profit. If finance is controlled by the gods, then there will be no financial turmoil, the gods will ensure that there is prosperity all around. This is the only way to save the world from another round of great depression.

Long Live the Tamil Nation, it will go down rewrite history

Sakkarakatti: Thollaikutti (to be read in mallustyle)

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 03:32:00 +0000

After a long time Im blogging, and feeling like tearing apart a movie. Its been a bloody long time since Ive ripped a movie, despite watching some terrible movies.

1. Namba Pudhiya illam puyal Shantnoo nadikara padam dhaan Sakkarakatti. Shantanoo oru puyal, puyal madri screen la varuvar, appadiyae avar nadipa parthu, puyal madri makkal ellam theatre exit ku oduvanga, avangloda sendhu padamum theatre-a vittu odidum.
2. Padam enavo usual story dhaan, one guy, two girls usual story, indha padathula enna pudhu muyarchi na director rumba restrained-a irukkar oru “murai ponnu” angle irundhum adhai use pannalai. Enna oru pudhumai, indha adaka odukam padam poora irundha, especially over the top song sequences la irundha nimmadhiya irukkum.
3. Innoru pudhumai enna na namba mama ponnu namba hero parthu love sollarathu, avaluku teriyum avan namba heroine love panneran nu, annalum sollera. Namba hero r omba kasta pattu convince pannerar that oru aaluku oru girlfriend dhaan irukka mudiyum, avarukum aasai ivalai side la vechi ottanum nu, annal namba director oru mara tamizhan, oru aaluku oru ponnu dhaan nu solitar ba. (Mara tamizhan director should have looked at our great tamilian Mu Karunanidhi, who has a manaivi and a thunaivi, appo padam konjam interesting-a irundhurukkum)
4. “Naan eppozdhu pen aanan” nu oru song irukku, andha pattu la kekkara kelvi ku badul obvious-a irukku. But indha artistic director, ingai dhaan oru twist vechirukkar. First, indha mama ponnu kulikachae namba hero pathi nenaikera, namba heroine kooda kulikachae namba hero pathi nenaikera. Rendu per manasulaiyum butterfly parakarathu (tamil cinema la buggerfly vandha kaadhal nu artham). Idhu dhaan twist, namba director subtle-a enna solla varar na, oru Penn, avo manasula kaadhal vandha dhaan penn aagaral. Abba idhu enna oru thathuvam.
5. Namba hero Climax la bayangara feel oda sollarar avar thappu pannittar nu, the audience can empathies with him, Shantnoo cinema la nadika varahae oru periya thappu dhaan!!
6. Indha padathula bayangaramana Krodham:2 hero Prem oda influence teriyaradhu, bayangara hi-tech-a hero sight adikarar. He uses live camera to cover all strategic locations where girls congregate to sight adichify them. This definitely has to be the influence of Krodham 2 Prem only. Vera yaralai indha madri yosika mudiyum?
7. Like the great tamil cinema tradition, the director has worked a little too hard on the songs, using various elements from various Hollywood and earlier tamil movies, with an overboard of graphics
8. George Lucas should patent the Light Saber, and every unique creation of his in the Star Wars Franchise. In this movie, the director has generously used the light saber; George Lucas will commit suicide if he watches it.
9. Ah, namba hero, acts like Prasanth. Annal kodumai enna na, avan English pesina oru kevalamana western accent pottu saavuadikaran.
10. Innoru ne-ra indha padathula hero, heroine, hero-oda jalra pasanga, heroine oda jalra pasanga, the mama ponnu, ellorum tamil la pesina oru accent oda pesaranga.
11. Indha heroine andha madri pesina paravallai, avo direct import from north India, the mama ponnu also import from north India, avanga pesina paravallai, annal the rest thanga mudiyalai.
12. The heroine looks like a White wash adicha peepa, kevalama irukka, padam poora summa pose kuduthu nikkara. At least she looks good she will conform to tamil cinema norms of good looking but women who cant act, she looks terrible like a whitewashed peepa. Enna kodumai saar idhu?
13. Coming to our hero, every tamil cinema hero has to prove he is a superman who does not wear his underwear over his pants. But he still is a super man. Idhai prove pannarathuku oru song sequence irukku, plus innoru kevalamana scene. Indha song la namba director pudhumai ku Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon and Good, Bad and Ugly mix pannirukkar, the song is Chinamma Chilikkama, kevalama irukku. But our Hero proves he is a jetti podatha super man.
14. Innoru scene oru dream sequence, idhula namba hero avaroda vettu janal vazhiya escape aagarar, to meet his kaadhali, the heroine, annal by mistake (Maybe because he is fully drunk or doped) and goes to his mama ponnu’s house.
15. The director should switch to mega serial directing.avaruku pennin manasu romba nalla purinjirukkar, enna oru insight oru pen eppo penn aagaral nu, avar engaiyo poitaar ba. Idhukum mela, avar super-a blade podrar, idhuku mela mega serial direct panna enna qualification venum?
16. Indha padam is like our old fashioned Bagayaraj movies, love triangle, but then it tried hard to be set in the current scenario, its still an old movie.

Risk Rating: Injurious to the viewer’s mental and physical health. Only for the obsessively sado-masochistic

Sudden Longing.......

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 10:19:00 +0000

......Days of undergraduation.

The Canteen with its disgusting food

Cutting class

Sleeping in Class

First Day First Show at Devi

Battling crowds to buy the tickets and watching movies from the front bench.

Sigh...its so long ago.

Never.......

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 04:29:00 +0000

Try and strive to maintain the average rate of inefficiency at work, beating it is injurious to health

And Finally...

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 03:54:00 +0000

She resided next door. I had a crush on her from the time I turned 14. Every day on my way to school, I used to stare at her, admire her curves. Oh, those curves, the curves were just perfect. I can tuck my legs into those curves while riding her. I’d imagine myself riding her every time I walked passed her. I wanted her. I needed her. Only her, it just had to be her.

I wanted her, and getting her wasn't easy. I had to wait almost 4 years, during which I could just enjoy her beauty from a distance. Every time she came to life, my heart would melt, I'd run outside to enjoy her voice, in all its glory. Then one day, I walked over, and had the courage to speak up, and walked out with her. Finally I could touch her, ah those curves, I could finally tuck my legs into them while riding her. She was mine.

And I tried to get her into the mood, I had to kick her, and she simply refused to cooperate and burnt me, in my ankle. She'd scarred me for life. Not one who easily gives up, I tried again, this time there were some signs of life, but she still refused to come to life. I tried again, I kicked her again, this time, she hit back, right on my leg.

Finally, she gave in, she came to life. I threw my legs across her, tucked my legs into her curves and drove into the horizon.

It’s been 4 years now; she's been a wonderful companion all these years, never letting me down. She is the 1972 Standard Bullet.

Bourgeoisie, and Mediocrity

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 08:34:00 +0000

Yesterday I saw the Hungarian Grand Prix. Kimi drove an uninspired race, it was hard to believe he was the same person who won the 2007 championship, driving inspired races.

I then realized, we all are striving to be like Kimi. With a Drivers Championship and a astronomical pay package at Ferrari, Kimi has probably achieved his material needs. He now probably has enough to spend for the rest of his life. He has reached where all of us wish to be, that is early on in life make enough money for a comfortable existence.

This exclusive focus on enough money, has shifted the aim from to money from learning and knowledge. This change has lead to the middle class aiming for the goal of money, and not for learning and knowledge. Ideally, money would be the product of learning and knowledge, since now it is the contrary, mediocrity has set in. The middle class is satisfied being mediocre. The middle class actively strives to be mediocre and attain the goal of sufficient money via mediocrity. This has created organizations which are too mediocre. In these organizations, mediocrity is praised, it’s loved, it’s adored, excellence is shunned, because it upsets status quo.

The entire life of the middle class, or broader classification of bourgeoisie follows the path of stable income, marriage, kids, family, excellence within mediocrity, prosperity, and then finally satisfaction and death. Their legacy is their family, which is what all other species do without going through half the hardship involved. All other species, accept they exist to help their DNA replicate itself, and focus merely on that. The homosapien is unable to do that, therefore has built an illusionary world.

Thathuvam

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 06:19:00 +0000

All bikes sold in India except the Bullet are metallic trash, yes it also includes the new Yamaha R 15. They are meant for boy racers who are infatuated with speed or middle aged men who are concerned about the mileage.

Only the Bullet, Yezdi and RD 350 have character.

Capitalism

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 11:49:00 +0000

..........is Privitising profits and Socializing Losses.

Well atleast the torchbearers of capitalism the Americans believe so.

PS: Freddie Mac. Fannie Mac and Bear Sterns.

PPS: Where are the Indian Libertarians? Kupakarai Vizhandhulam Meesaila Man ottalaiya?

Random Doubt XXIXX

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 04:10:00 +0000

Every morning, I usually have a coffee at work. It is near this window overlooking the parking lot. I am usually early, a lot of people come in after i do. I notice quite a few people come into work.

The women usually dont comb their hair looking into their bike's mirror. The men with some hair comb their hair, adjust its position looking into the mirror on their bike. This does not take them too much time.

Its the bald or balding men who take the most time adjusting their looks using their bikes mirror. I wonder why they do so. Their poor hair could not stand their torture and obsession with their hair and has given up, despite this these men torture their hair. I pity their hair. I wonder what is the point of bald or balding men combing their hair.

Ah someone once said there are two types of men, the bald and the balding men. Well then men should not simply bother combing their hair.

Random Conversations

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 13:38:00 +0000

Dude 1: Smoking Kretek cigarettes is supposed to cure asthma and respiratory problems.

Dude 2: Thats bullshit, its like saying "having sex to attain virginity"

:-O :-O

PS: Kretek Cigarettes apperantely are supposed to cure asthma. I quote from Wikipedia "The creator of kretek was one Haji Jamahri, a native of the town of Kudus in Indonesia’s Central Java. Suffering from chest pains, Haji Jamahri attempted to reduce the pain by rubbing clove oil on his chest. Jamahri sought a means of achieving a deeper relief and smoked his hand-rolled cigarettes after adding dried clove buds. According to the story, his asthma and chest pains vanished immediately."

:-O :-O

Random Post XXIVV

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 12:31:00 +0000

Google Chat status Message:

XYZ: Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour and it seems like a minute. Thats relativity- Albert Einstein

ME: Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty brainless girl for minute and it seems like eternity. Thats relativity- Albert Einstein

Dude 1: Put your hand on a hot girl for an hour and it will still feel like a microsecond.

Yes and Dude 1 is going to get married soon. Wonder what his wife is going to say :-) (Guess she is not the hot girl he is referring to).

Idhuku peru dhaan velila pora oonanai, madila edhuthu pottukarathu.

I wonder........

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 07:14:00 +0000

......if news papers now consistently choose columnists because they are dumber than the average reader. Then the reader would massage his/her ego reading the columnist, and also can have a good laugh at the columnist. Classic example would be the Business Standards weekly technology column

There was a time when reading the Hindu editorial was educational, it was before N Ram decided to turn it into the "People's Daily of Chennai". Indian Express and Hindu writers were more intelligent than the average reader. The news papers actually strive to publish intelligent writers who made sense.

PS: Maybe I was younger then and dumber, therefore found the Hindu and Indian Express writers as intelligent.

Circa 2008, 1990 Japan

noreply@blogger.com (ada-paavi!!!!) — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 08:18:00 +0000

Irrational exuberance never lasts. Plain and simple.

Sensex at 13000, Nifty at 3600. Japan 1990?

Recession? Depression? Housing bubbles always precede them.

Another Great depression, nah too far fetched.

Interesting time to live through I suppose.