Slippery Nipples

I have moved.

2005-11-24T01:55:00.000+08:00

Indeed, I have succumbed to the temptations of the dark side, and returned to the blogging sphere.

Visit me at http://perfectegg.blogspot.com

Don't ask about the address. It's a long story.

Going down.

2005-11-20T06:30:00.000+08:00

When I first started this blog, it was for the sole purpose of updating my friends, family & loved ones of my own life. These are the people whom I may hardly see in my lives, but they are also the same people who care about my life, my thoughts.

When I first started this blog, it was intended for private viewing.

But I have since invited strangers into my blog, my life.

I have also invited many other people from my real world, to my electronic world.

Today, I no longer see the need to maintain a blog, because I no longer find the motivation to write for the benefit of people who don't know me. I no find the motivation to write and censor my thoughts simply because there are so many people reading this.

I will be shutting down the blog, there will be no furthur entries.

Perhaps, one day, I will once again open up to invite strangers into my life, I will perhaps once again write on more than what my life is.

Perhaps.

But for now, my thoughts remain my own. Private, somewhere else.

The past always manages to catch up.

2005-11-13T22:50:00.000+08:00

No matter how much we want to forget it, how much we want to ignore it. No matter what we do, the past always manages to creep up somehow or another.

Like how you go past the block of flats where someone you used to date lives, and wonder how he's getting on, if he's still the way he used to be, or if he has changed his way. You think about the times that was spent with him, and wonder if it was worth it.

Or looking at the Friendster account of someone else, and wonder what life was like with him. You wonder if things would have been different if... Then you wonder also, how life has been for him, in terms of what he's done this time.

You wonder about your ex-es, wonder if they are the same to you they are to every other girlfriend they've had, or you were different. You wonder if he hurts every other girl the way he hurt you. You wonder if the things people say about him is true, and then you wonder why you never saw it in him.

Then that feeling inside just emerges. Isit a tinge of spite? Hate? Jealousy? Or bitterness? Are you glad he's moved on to someone else and happy, or are you wondering if he really is true to this girl he is with now.

And then you look at your life now, as it is, and you wonder if things would have been better if... Then you realise, there is no if, because all that matters, is here and now.

Stop whining!!

2005-11-13T13:48:00.000+08:00

For the past couple of weeks or so, one of the hot topics on everyone's lips is that of that Vietnamese Aussie PR who is set to be hung for drug trafficking in Singapore. Here in Singapore, we say, no big deal, people get hanged everyday for trafficking in drugs, and what's so bad about that? It's a crime and you have to pay for it.

Elsewhere, things just aren't as easy. This latest episode brings up yet again another criticism of the Singapore legal system. Capital punishment. Should there be any at all? Many argue no, because it violates human rights and you are basically trying to "play god" because no other human beings have the right to take away the lives of other human beings.

Ok, what if the person committed murder instead? He took away another person's life, and in that process he loses his right to live since he violated the sanctity of someone else's life first right?

Bringing ourselves back into the crime of drug trafficking. Everyday, thousands and millions of lives all over the world are ruined because of drugs and its effects. Who are those culpable and responsible for it? The drug dealers of course, and those who bring drugs to the people. The drug traffickers. If you are involved in the process of ruining someone's life knowing very well the harmful effects of drug-consumation, then haven't you knowingly committed the same thing a murderer has done, and hence has no right whatsoever to live?

Of course, this is a very base argument, exaggerated at certain points. But the fact remains that Nguyen committed a crime that may not be heinous, but a crime that helps perpetuates and encourages the drug problem, especially in this part of the world. So what if you were just carrying the drugs through Singapore and into Australia? Did you not have to come into Singapore to achieve that purpose? Does this not subject you to our laws?

Perhaps when it comes to the legal system, these things are subjective, there are loopholes in the law, many things can be argued. But there are things that can't.

Drugs are harmful, everyone knows that. Even your common panadol or aspirin sold over the counter/off the shelf can be harmful when taken in large doses. Morphine helps to ease the pain of patients but if over-administered can cause addiction in a person. We all know that addiction is a bad word. What more an addiction to drugs? Did you not know you were doing something morally questionable when you were smuggling them? Do you not admit you committed a crime, somehow?

Yes, you did it to save your brother who was in debt (because of his credit card bills, which I heard, were chalked up by the girlfriend), but does it make you any more innocent than you were?

Not to mention the millions of reports everyday, the most absurb being one that Australians were boycotting Singapore because of this issue. These reports bring no justice to the Singaporean legal system. Sure, our legal code may not be perfect, but hey, it does it most basic job, and that is to keep crime rates low and the country safe and secure. Can you gladly say the same for your country? We may not enjoy freedom of press, not much freedom of speech, but we have the freedom to walk out on the streets and night and not worry about being mugged/robbed/raped/molested/gunned down.

Besides, freedom, by whose standards? Yours or mine? Just because you have a different idea and standard of how freedom ought to be, it doesn't mean you can impose it on mine if ours differ.

The man committed a crime, and he should be punished for it. Regardless of whether or not he did it for his brother/mother/wife/daughter/cousin. So stop acting as though he was innocently charged for a crime he did.

Yummy!!!

2005-11-12T22:24:00.000+08:00

Yummy!!!
Originally uploaded by hecate.

Tried some new flavour from Myojo (some ramen thingy but actually a rival of Indomee's mee goreng in disguise), plus a sunny side up on top. YUMmmm..

7 Things Meme!

2005-11-11T03:28:00.000+08:00

Its 0330hours over here and I'm just thinking of going to sleep before carrying on with my revision in the morning. Planning to wake up at 9am and then head down to the lib to do some photocopying. Again. (Serial Photocopier. Me)

Anyway, here's the SEVEN THINGS MEME! *wide silly grin*

Seven things that scare me:
1. Losing my loved ones
2. Losing control of my thoughts
3. Not being able to exercise AkA play floorball anymore
4. Failing my exams and being a complete failure in life
5. Graduating from school and stepping out into the working world
6. Becoming fat
7. Becoming old and senile

Seven things I like the most:
1. Hugs and Kisses and lots of love
2. my iBook
3. snuggling in bed with Andrew (being with him in general)
4. the feeling of being free
5. playing floorball
6. sleeping
7. FOOD!

Seven most important things in my room:
Note: This question is designed to trick people lik e me. Why? Because I live in 4 different places simultaneously: my room @ home, my room @ Kuok, Andrew's room @ RVR, and my table at the Clubroom. :D
1. my iBook, with all my music inside
2. my speakers with the wonderful bass that costed only $35
3. the clubroom desktop! cause that's where all the music & videos come from
4. Andrew's Canon ixus I. Cause i'm a photoslut =)
5. the pillow that stinks. haha
6. my comforter on my bed @ home
7. my sister, for without her, my room would be super neat and super quiet. *wide grin*

Seven random facts about me:
1. I throw my things around, but I have a compulsive need for the workspace to be NEAT
2. I have a weak tummy, even though I eat alot
3. I like to spend money and buy things when I'm in a bad mood
4. I cook, wash, bake, and clean!
5. I check my email every 30 mins
6. I love to read, even my readings. :D
7. I have a compulsive need to check books out of the library every single time I step inside one

Seven things i plan to do before i die:
1. Start my own business
2. Get a driving license
3. Get a boating license
4. Get married and have kids
5. Go on a tour of Europe, especially Spain
6. Tell everyone how much I love them
7. Watch the sunset and sunrise

Seven things i can do:
1. Publish a magazine
2. Run a camp
3. Love everyone around me
4. Be happy =)
5. Sleep for only 3 hours and yet function normally
7. Eat like a pig
6. Not eat at all
7. Play floorball

Seven things i can't do:
1. cycle
2. play the drums
3. go without sleep
4. stop worrying about my loved ones
5. straighten my right knee
6. drive
7. roll my Rs

Seven words i say the most:
1. I'm hungry
2. I want to sleep/The Yongming syndrome has kicked in.
3. Wah lao eh!
4. Hmmm..
5. Orh..
6. Bleh
7. Har?

Seven Celeb crushes:
1. Johnny Depp!!!
2. The garderner who shagged Gabrielle in Desperate Housewives (he's how hot)
3. Eva Longoria (Gabrielle in Desperate Housewives)
4. Daniel Wu!
5. Angelina Jolie
6. Katherine Moennig (she plays a butch on The L Word, damn hot la I tell you)
7. The guy who plays Carlos on Desperate Housewives (I love Spanish men!)

Seven people i'd love to see do this:
Note: I have no idea who I want to do this, so I'll leave it blank, everyone wants to do is welcome!! =)
1.
2.
3.
4.
4.
5.
6.
7.

Deepavali

2005-11-02T21:49:00.000+08:00

Dinner at Jeremiah's was great. The food was fabulous, had all sorts of curry; vegetarian, chicken, fish, mutton, had prawns. Half a bottle of wine with Tiff, another half with Sharon. One shot of vodka for Andrew. It's just good.

Revision starts now though, gonna go RBR and then do all the readings at one shot so I can sit down and study for one shot.

Don't think I'll be going home this weekend.

Ouch!!

2005-10-30T15:17:00.000+08:00

Had a very wonderful sleep in my very cosy sleeping bag. Supposed to wake up at 8 with Puay Cher to go to the lib, but we both ended up sleeping until 12noon!! That girl rushed off to Church and I snoozed til like 2? Woohoo!

Wanted to go back to Kuok to have a nice bath and wash up and then pack up to go home, was walking up the steps when I suddenly trip on one of the steps and fell! Then I realised I had two big cuts at the bottom of my right big toe. Damn painful.

Hobbled back to Sports Club, thankfully Grace was there and she helped me to clean it up. =S

I am officially "pai kah" for the rest of the week.

Training

2005-10-30T02:37:00.000+08:00

Got to play defence today.

Somehow I really like defence more than forward, although I've been playing that position for the past few years.

True, when I play defence I can hardly shoot or score or whatever else I do, but with defence, I feel so much more comfortable and confident of my ball control & handling skills.

Ppleeasseee can I play defence again?

Rambling thoughts..

2005-10-29T02:23:00.000+08:00

Nothing seems to be of interest to blog about anymore, maybe I'm just getting tired with blogging..or perhaps I'm just too busy and tired with my everyday life to even think about blogging.

Been playing with the idea of committing blogicide, but I'm just playing with the idea. Perhaps when the holidays roll around and I need to get the writing/creative juices flowing, I'll start this thing rolling again.

Speaking of creative juices. The "all-new" SPORTLight was unleashed on the NUS population on Thursday and Friday. 1900 copies in total. One entire month of hard work from the writers, Jiexin and me! Seeing the completed version on your laptop/desktop and seeing it materialize into 2000 copies and being distributed all over NUS with every other random stranger holding on to a copy of your magazine are just two different things.

MY magazine. Ours. Everything is just so surreal. Never thought that a closet Photoshop-er like me would one day be able to print something and distribute it to 1900 individuals across campus.

Not to mention the sponsors/corporate people who will be getting a copy to see how we can help them in terms of advertisement.

It's just, amazing.

Life lately has just been Andrew, Canoe, Training, and days spent in the clubroom either 1)reading, 2)nua-ing, 3)napping. Days are spent replying emails, sending emails, trying to keep up with schoolwork.

Ah, schoolwork. Comm is closing, training is stopping, just cause the exams are here.

Once again I'm faced with the horrible thought that my grades will be horrible, and once again I'm at that crossroads I face every half a year since last semester.

Will I be doing my honours?

For now, no one knows. Not even me.

Anyway, just attended SMU Sports Awards Night. Interesting, to say the least. Things are done very differently there. The sports community is so small everyone knows everyone.

Later went to celebrate Jiexin's birthday. The youngest member of our committee! =)

Took lots of pictures, but I'm just too damn tired to post them. Will do so after Tuesday @ Jere's house for Deepavali (or isit Deevapali?).

Andrew's got a new camera, Canon Ixus i (or something like that, its an ixus for sure), and we're both enjoying ourselves with it. *damn photosluts we are*

So I guess there'll be more pictures.

Stay tuned.

Imperfect

2005-10-09T19:00:00.000+08:00

In your eyes,

I will always be flawed.

I will always be imperfect.

I will always be too stupid, too fat, too short, too emotional, too insecure, too jealous, too possesive, too overbearing, too helpless.

No matter how hard I try to be supportive.

No matter how hard I try to be there for you.

No matter how hard I try to make you happy.

I will never be perfect in your eyes.

To you, I am always flawed & imperfect.

But in your eyes, will I ever be that figure of flawed perfection?

Nightmare

2005-10-02T10:48:00.000+08:00

I had a horrible nightmare yesterday which never seemed to end;

I dreamt that I was taking modules like FNA1002 (AGAIN!) and SC1101E. Then I realised I had two tests on the same day, one after another and I didn't study for it. THEN, the worst thing was I realised I WAS ONLY TAKING 4 MODULES!! *argh* I even took out my PRESENT timetable to count the modules and IT WAS THE SAME!!! *double ARGH*

That Sovil et Titus movie

2005-09-25T02:52:00.000+08:00

Those old enough to remember, will remember that very cliche watch ad that goes, 不在忽天长地九，只在忽曾经永有.

Ad is cliche, but the movie ain't.

For those not in the know, the movie is set in World War II, Andy Lau plays a KMT pilot who comes from a family of pilots. Jacqueline Wu plays a swaku, innocent village girl whose entire village rescues Andy from his crashed plane and nurses him back to health.

Needless to say, the pair spend alot of time together and fall in love, blahblablah..

Later, Andy manages to go back to his squadron, away from Wu, but she travels all the way to the city to look for him. They reunite.

One fine day, Andy is sent to a mission which he has no chance of survival. The day of his departure, a plane explodes on the runway.

Upon knowing that he might return, everyone clears runway. Everyone thinks they won't return and retreat. Wu, desperate for him to come back, clears runway on her own and lifts heavy debris. Andy's mom is impressed.

Ending? Andy comes back and they live happily ever after.

Ok, on second thoughts, it is a pretty lame movie. But think about this, because of the love she has for Andy, no matter what happens, the love that she has gives her strength to even move plane debris! Wow!

No but seriously, I think what the movie is trying to say is that love transcends all odds, and I guess it does a pretty ok, albeit cliche job of doing this.

Would you move mountains for the ones you love? I know people who can and would. But what about you?

For goodness' sake...

2005-09-24T02:56:00.000+08:00

STOP POSTING COMMENTS ON MY BLOG SOLICITING YOUR CRAP BLOG!!!

Things you do when you are bored # 56479

2005-09-24T01:40:00.000+08:00

You recover a copy of "Sportlight" February 2003 and amuse yourself with an interview conducted by a predecessor who is also the big brother of a friend.

It's 1.40am and the night seems amazingly long. Arrived at clubroom at about 8 or 9pm earlier, sat for a while, and at 11pm it seemed like 3am already.

So this is what it feels like to have nothing to do.

Actually, I do have alot of things to do, its just that, hmm, for some reason I feel so free.

So I basically spent half the evening reading emails, replying emails and cursing and swearing at writers who write a good 1000+++ word article when I SPECIFICALLY told them to stick between 700 to 1000.

Not forgetting the sub clubs who give you last minute articles.

Now I have to re-sort my entire magazine.

Thanks people, now I have to cut and paste everything I did.

No actually, I love all of you! I'm serious. Nothing better knowing that you've got great response from both the NUS body and sub clubs.

Also, nothing better knowing that you can start work early on the next issue.

Nothing better knowing that this issue will be a blast (if I can get past the sorting thing, that is).

Of course, nothing is without challenges, as my dear boyfriend-confidante-huggy/fuzzy/hairy bear-resident irritant-perm. resident in my life Andrew would put it;

"Your greatest challenge and success is not about making sure everyone reads the magazine. Rather, it would be to ensure that the changes you implement will be continued after you leave."

How true.

Thanks for the reminder, and the trip back to earth. =P

On another note, I kinda like blogging like this. In sporadic sentences and paragraphs. Sure makes it easier to read my crap too.

Going home tomorrow, I hope mom makes a smashing good home cooked dinner-cum-belated birthday celebration.

Whee.

Feels so good...

2005-09-22T22:05:00.000+08:00

...after training. Never felt so full of energy in a while.

Uncomfortable.

2005-09-22T10:32:00.000+08:00

"I am not comfortable with this at all", she said.

"If she was a friend and she respected our relationship, then why did she do what she had to do?", asked the face.

"She didn't have to do say the things she did," she said.

"Why does it seem that she's in a more important position for me?", the face said.

"She doesn't know alot, she doesn't know too much to say anything", she said.

"I don't like this at all either", the face said.

Deadlines!!

2005-09-22T02:47:00.000+08:00

Managed to finish up half my essay today.

And a few articles the day before.

Will have more work to do tomorrow. Meeting in the morning, hopefully a short nap before training in the evening, and then study like mad for my test on Friday.

Went for a run at West Coast too.

Helped Sean with his marketing project and at the same time trying (desperately) to improve my (non-existent) portfolio.

Today I saw him smile. He flashed the widest and biggest smile I've seen in a long, long time.

I wonder when I'll be able to see the same kinda smile again. The feeling is just so, heart-melting.

I'm that girl

2005-09-19T02:07:00.000+08:00

Like my dear cousin who is also brooding at the moment, I just felt like reminiscing. Also, in honour of MercerMachine, who started it all

I'm that girl who stayed up late to talk to you, despite knowing that my dad would be very pissed if he found out I was up so late.

I'm that girl whom you sang countless songs to, only to make me fall even furthur.

I'm that girl who had a crush on you for 2 years, and having no courage to tell you about it.

I'm that girl who stays up at night worrying about your health, about whether you could keep up at your age, running to and fro to take care of your parents.

I'm that girl who spent 12 hours on the phone with you, talking about everything and nothing at all.

I'm that girl who made you brownies, failing in the second batch where it was just plain tasteless and yet you said they were sweet enough.

I'm that girl who wakes you up every morning, despite not having enough sleep myself, despite having to be late for my lessons.

I'm that girl who kissed you on the cheek at the bus stop when my bus arrived, knowing that you wouldn't have known what to do.

I'm that girl who lay on your shoulder on the MRT, because I didn't know what to do or say when I received Brownie.

I'm that girl worries about your well-being day and night, praying that you'll be able to get through it all.

I'm that girl who misses you like crazy.

I'm that girl who stays up late to write you letters, hoping that you'll feel better.

I'm that girl who feels the same pain you do.

I'm that girl who sits here and wonders if you see and you acknowledge the things I do for you, wondering if this just creates a dependancy that doesn't entail love.

I'm that girl who made you cry, because I wouldn't take you back.

I'm that girl whom you foolishly tried ways and means to make me happy, only to have me hate you for doing the things you do.

I'm that girl used to hit you on your shoulder with my water bottle.

I'm the girl whose handphone you stole from my bag, despite all the trust I had in you.

I'm the girl who cried because she felt she wasn't a good enough captain.

I'm the girl takes risks, and makes stupid mistakes.

I'm the girl who wonders why she has to be put in stupid situations.

I'm the girl who feels the occasional melancholy.

I'm the girl who broods once in a while.

I'm that girl who feels uncertainty over things between you and me, because I'm not sure of how you feel about me. I'm also that girl who is afraid of telling you this because I don't want to make you feel I'm forcing you into a long term commitment, because I'm not.

I'm that girl who worried about how life would be when you were gone. Only to realise years later that all this while I was drawing strength from your legacy, to be what I am today, to be who you always wish I would be.

Yeah, I'm that girl, who are you?

Collide

2005-09-14T01:59:00.000+08:00

The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Yeah

But I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find, you and I collide

I'm quiet, you know
You make a first impression
I've found I'm scared to know
I'm always on your mind

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
You somehow find, you and I collide

Don't stop here
I've lost my place
I'm close behind

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find, you and I collide

You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide

It's amazing how the words of just one song can say so much about the relationship between you and a person.

It's even more amazing that the song just touches you so deep you don't even know where to start.

Wrote him a letter, hope it would make him feel better. There are alot of things I might not be able to do for him, but I hope the little gift lets him know that he's not alone in this, that I'm with him, holding his hands each and every step along the way.

Don't cry,
Wipe the tears from your eyes.
Don't cry,
Sleep with the souls tonight.
There's nowhere to run, nowhere to hide,
Fear is a monster, no end in sight,
no screaming, silent screaming,
tonight, close your eyes,
Dream..

Let me be the one to hold your hand and make everything better.

I worry I won't see your face,
Light up again...

Memories, nostalgia..

2005-09-11T02:11:00.000+08:00

It's so hard to make the first step to walk away from something you've known all your life and start on something new..

It's even harder to come back and see how much that thing has improved by leaps and bounds..

It's worse when you realise just how much you miss playing with this bunch of people, whom you've learnt to grow with, whom you shared so much of your life with..

Absolutely gutted when you also realise just how much the team doesn't need you anymore, but yet you still miss playing with them, when all the memories just flood back..

Gutted, just gutted.

Sports Ball 2005

2005-09-08T01:12:00.000+08:00

Event was fun, took alot of photos.

Pics coming up soon!!!!!!

Time for a diet.

2005-09-01T01:24:00.000+08:00

Was getting dressed after shower and realised with horror that the size of my tummy has grown to epic proportions.

Damage control is as follows:
- Strict diet consisting of one meal per day, low carbo, high in fibre and protein
- Running every day

This damage control will be implemented w.e.f Thursday, 1st September 2005, and will continue until subject's weight goes down by 10kg, or size of tummy reduces by 6 inches, whichever is achieved first.

26th MC Publications Director

2005-08-29T00:14:00.000+08:00

After a 12 hour election yesterday, we finally managed to decide for ourselves who we wanted to lead us, and who we wanted working with us in the various different posts.

Yes, the NUS Students' Sports Club 26th management comm is born, we are still very young, with many positions still unfilled, but everything is more or less in place, and we're pretty ready to face the world! Heh heh..

It's gonna be a busy year, but fulfilling. It seems almost as if I'm back into my OI days kinda mode, where I did anything and everything.

Saw on Beng's blog about his concerns with production, as well as his field of study. Coincidentally I've also been thinking about the importance of grades. If I make it to honours, good for me, what if I don't, would a B+ average and a B make alot of difference?

Introducing the SE Z520i

2005-08-24T01:52:00.000+08:00

Was surfing and came across this little beauty:

The SE K520I. It's not exactly a phone packed with lotsa functions, but its good enough for me. A VGA camera, bluetooth, and MP3 ringtones. Problem is, the memory is not expandable, but it should be enough for me.

Birthday gift for me, anyone?